Ismail Kamdar – Mustafa Sabris Writings on Preserving the Family

Ismail Kamdar
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The speakers discuss the importance of honoring Him for his actions and faithing him for his deeds. They also discuss the history and legacy of the Ottoman Empire, including its collapse and dismantling of the Khilafat. The speakers emphasize the importance of preserving families and building diplomatic families to avoid harmful elements of the outside world. They also touch on the idea that Islam is not a religious system and that women and men should not be affected by it.

AI: Summary ©

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			In the name of Allah, we praise Him,
		
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			we ask for His help, we ask for
		
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			His forgiveness, and we believe in Him.
		
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			And we put our trust in Him, and
		
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			we say to Him, O Allah, from the
		
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			evil of our mouths and from the evil
		
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			of our deeds, there is none worthy of
		
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			worship except Him, and there is none worthy
		
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			of worship except Him, and there is no
		
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			one worthy of worship except Him.
		
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			One of the topics that I am quite
		
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			passionate about is reviving a way of thinking
		
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			about family and community.
		
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			Now, I believe in the past two decades,
		
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			we have become too individualistic in our thinking.
		
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			Most people these days are unable to think
		
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			outside of themselves.
		
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			Life has become all about me, all about
		
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			my ego, all about my desires, my goals.
		
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			People don't think as families anymore, people don't
		
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			think as communities anymore, they don't think as
		
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			part of an ummah anymore.
		
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			Many people can only think about themselves.
		
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			And there are many topics that need to
		
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			be discussed to fix this.
		
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			And I'm going to spend a few weeks
		
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			discussing some of these topics.
		
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			But today, I'm going to do something a
		
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			little bit different.
		
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			I'm going to go to the biography of
		
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			a very interesting scholar that you might not
		
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			be aware of.
		
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			And from his biography, I'm going to then
		
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			go into some of his writings and teachings
		
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			about family, that may help you to think
		
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			differently about family.
		
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			You see, one of the problems we have
		
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			today amongst the youth is that many of
		
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			them don't want to get married.
		
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			And when they weigh the benefits of being
		
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			single against the benefits of being married, in
		
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			their minds, for many of them, there are
		
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			more benefits than being single.
		
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			Many young people think of marriage and family
		
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			as a responsibility, as a burden, as something
		
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			that's getting in the way of their dreams.
		
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			And we need to fix this way of
		
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			thinking.
		
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			So today, I want to share with you
		
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			something I read recently that really reshaped the
		
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			way I think about family.
		
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			Recently, I've been reading through the writings of
		
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			Sheikh-ul-Islam Mustafa Sabri Effendi.
		
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			I'm not sure many of you have heard
		
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			about him.
		
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			He was the last or second last Sheikh
		
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			-ul-Islam of the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			A very important individual.
		
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			And his writings are very important and relevant
		
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			to our times.
		
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			So just a bit about who this man
		
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			is before we get into his teachings about
		
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			family.
		
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			Sheikh Mustafa Sabri was born in the 1800s,
		
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			around 1860.
		
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			And he passed away around 1950.
		
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			He lived through the fall of the Ottoman
		
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			Empire.
		
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			But he didn't just live through the fall
		
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			of the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			He was one of the most important people
		
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			in the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			Mustafa Sabri was born into a scholarly family.
		
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			And became one of the most important, leading,
		
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			Hanafi scholars in the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			To such an extent that when Sultan Abdul
		
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			Hamid began his project for trying to save
		
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			the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			Trying to preserve it from falling apart.
		
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			Mustafa Sabri was one of those scholars he
		
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			hired for this project.
		
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			He worked very closely with the Khalifa.
		
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			In trying to prevent the Ottoman Empire from
		
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			falling apart.
		
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			And in the year 1923, Mustafa Sabri was
		
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			promoted to Sheikh of Islam.
		
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			Sheikh of Islam is the highest position that
		
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			a scholar can get in the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			The Sheikh of Islam is essentially the Grand
		
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			Mufti and the Chief Qadi.
		
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			The Chief Judge of the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			The one person who has the most authority
		
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			to interpret the Sharia.
		
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			He was put into this position in 1923.
		
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			Anyone remember when the Ottoman Empire collapsed?
		
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			1924.
		
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			Just one year later.
		
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			He came into this position too late.
		
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			By the time Mustafa Sabri became Sheikh of
		
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			Islam.
		
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			The Kamalists, the secularists had already taken over
		
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			Turkey.
		
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			And they were trying to dismantle the Khilafat.
		
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			And one year later they would be successfully
		
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			dismantling the Khilafat.
		
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			And so his time as Sheikh of Islam
		
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			was a very shaky time.
		
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			Because he was trying to preserve the Sharia.
		
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			And the new leaders were trying to dismantle
		
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			the Sharia.
		
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			And sadly he lost his battle.
		
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			And he was removed from his position.
		
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			And the Sharia was dismantled.
		
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			And the Khilafat was dismantled.
		
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			And we are still living in the aftermath
		
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			of that.
		
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			After the Khilafat was dismantled.
		
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			Mustafa Sabri found himself in a very strange
		
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			position.
		
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			He was the Chief Sheikh of the Ottoman
		
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			Empire.
		
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			And now there is no Ottoman Empire.
		
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			Now there is nation states and secularism and
		
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			liberalism.
		
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			And nobody wants him.
		
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			Nobody wants him.
		
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			I am a scholar who is talking about
		
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			Islam and calling people back to Islam.
		
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			He now has to leave the country.
		
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			And he moves from land to land seeking
		
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			a new place to live.
		
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			And nobody wants him.
		
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			He goes to France, he goes to Algeria,
		
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			he goes to many different places.
		
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			Eventually he settles in Egypt.
		
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			And even in Egypt people don't really like
		
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			what he is saying.
		
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			Egypt in the 1930s was very much influenced
		
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			by feminism and liberalism.
		
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			It had become a very westernized land.
		
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			He talks a lot about this in his
		
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			writings.
		
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			And the people living in Egypt at that
		
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			time did not like what Mustafa Sabri had
		
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			to say.
		
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			But he settled there.
		
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			And he dedicated the rest of his life
		
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			to writing books.
		
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			Very very powerful books.
		
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			Some of the most important books produced in
		
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			the past hundred years.
		
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			His books were focused primarily on refuting modern
		
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			ideologies.
		
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			This is the 1930s.
		
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			He wrote books against liberalism, secularism, feminism.
		
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			All of these different ideologies.
		
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			He wrote books against them in the 1930s.
		
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			And one of the topics that he emphasized
		
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			a lot in these books was the importance
		
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			of preserving the family.
		
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			And then you see the different phases of
		
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			his life.
		
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			When Mustafa Sabri was young, his goal was
		
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			to preserve the Ottoman Empire.
		
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			To protect it from collapsing.
		
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			That failed after World War I and the
		
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			Ottoman Empire collapsed.
		
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			His goal after that was to try and
		
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			revive the Khilafat.
		
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			Okay, the Ottoman Empire collapsed, maybe we can
		
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			have another Khilafat.
		
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			But within a few years he realized the
		
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			Ummah is too divided.
		
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			These nation states are going to be here
		
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			for a while.
		
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			We are not going to have a Khilafat
		
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			anytime soon.
		
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			Then he switches gears to trying to protect
		
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			the Iman of people through his writings by
		
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			refuting modern ideologies.
		
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			But what's interesting at this point is that
		
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			a key focus of his in refuting modern
		
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			ideologies is emphasizing the importance of family.
		
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			Why?
		
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			Why does he talk so much about family?
		
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			This is something I found very interesting about
		
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			his writings.
		
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			At the time when the Khilafat had just
		
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			collapsed, people had fallen into secularism and liberalism
		
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			and all of these other isms.
		
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			Mustafa Asabri talks a lot about family.
		
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			He talks a lot about the importance of
		
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			preserving family.
		
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			The importance of having a big family, having
		
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			a strong family, having a righteous family.
		
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			You see, one of the key points that
		
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			stood out in his writings to me is
		
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			he talks about families as power structures.
		
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			This is very interesting.
		
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			Many of us, we don't think of families
		
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			as power structures.
		
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			We just think of families as people we
		
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			know.
		
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			You grow up with your siblings and then
		
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			you go your own way.
		
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			That's not how families were looked at historically.
		
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			In Islam, power is decentralized.
		
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			No one person has all the power.
		
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			The Khalifa has a certain level of power,
		
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			but there's limits to his power.
		
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			For example, the Khalifa cannot interpret the Sharia.
		
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			It's the ulama who interpret the Sharia.
		
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			So the Khalifa cannot interfere with what the
		
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			law is.
		
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			The law comes from the ulama, not from
		
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			the Khalifa.
		
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			So there's limits to his power.
		
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			So the Khalifa is one type of power.
		
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			The ulama are a different type of power.
		
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			The judges are a different type of power.
		
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			But the head of the household is also
		
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			a different type of power.
		
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			In Islam, a family or a tribe is
		
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			a unit of power.
		
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			It's a power structure.
		
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			And the head of the household or the
		
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			tribal chief has actual power in the community
		
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			to such an extent that in the Hanafi
		
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			Madhab and specifically in the Ottoman Empire, the
		
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			head of the household functioned as a mini
		
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			-Khalifa.
		
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			The level of power that a man has
		
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			in his home under the Hanafi Madhab is
		
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			almost like a mini-Khalifa.
		
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			What does this mean?
		
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			It means, for example, in the Ottoman Empire,
		
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			if you were a man and you had
		
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			your wives and your children and your grandchildren
		
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			and you had a huge compound in which
		
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			your whole family lived, how you run that
		
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			compound is not the government's business.
		
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			What rules you have for your family is
		
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			not the government's business.
		
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			As long as you are not oppressing anyone,
		
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			as long as you are not harming anyone,
		
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			how you run your house is your own
		
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			business.
		
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			That a man literally operated as a mini
		
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			-Khalifa with his family.
		
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			And this meant if a person had a
		
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			big family, if somebody had a large family,
		
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			they would be very powerful.
		
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			They would be very influential.
		
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			So what's interesting is that Sheikh Mustafa Sabri,
		
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			he noticed a couple of trends happening in
		
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			the Muslim world that he found dangerous in
		
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			the 1930s.
		
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			One of them, very interestingly, he talks often
		
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			in his writings about a marriage crisis.
		
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			He says young people can't find anyone to
		
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			get married to.
		
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			He talks about the marriage crisis.
		
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			People in their late 20s and early 30s
		
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			can't find anyone to get married to.
		
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			This is in the 1930s in Egypt.
		
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			Very similar to what our community faces today.
		
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			Very similar situation.
		
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			He talks about the marriage crisis.
		
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			He talks about the things that led to
		
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			the marriage crisis.
		
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			The rise of Sinar, people delaying marriage because
		
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			of education.
		
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			Very similar to what we are facing today.
		
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			But another problem he talks about is how
		
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			Muslims turned against polygamy.
		
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			This is very interesting, right?
		
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			So the way Mustafa Sabri approaches this topic
		
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			is he says that throughout the bulk of
		
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			Muslim history, nobody had a problem with polygamy.
		
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			It was a normal practice in the Muslim
		
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			world.
		
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			Colonization happens.
		
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			The British force their values on the Muslims.
		
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			And suddenly the Muslims now start looking at
		
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			polygamy and polygamous families as a bad thing.
		
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			So he argues in his writings, specifically in
		
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			his Kolun Vara, his views on womanhood.
		
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			He argues for the importance of polygamy.
		
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			And he argues for it from a very
		
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			interesting angle.
		
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			About families being power structures.
		
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			So he said in the past if a
		
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			man had four wives and seven children of
		
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			each wife, he is a very powerful member
		
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			of the community.
		
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			Every member of that family is going to
		
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			protect each other.
		
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			Every member of that family is going to
		
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			care for each other.
		
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			You can't oppress any member of that family
		
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			because the rest of the family is going
		
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			to team up and help them.
		
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			But family is huge.
		
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			You have more people there who are likely
		
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			to protect you and help you against external
		
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			forces.
		
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			And he said that the reason why they
		
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			tried to get rid of polygamy in the
		
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			Muslim world was to make families smaller to
		
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			make families weaker.
		
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			So now a man goes from having a
		
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			large family to a smaller family.
		
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			In our time, even smaller family.
		
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			In our times, many people don't think of
		
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			family as protection.
		
00:11:10 --> 00:11:12
			They think of family as inconvenience.
		
00:11:13 --> 00:11:16
			And the important metaphor here, he says that
		
00:11:16 --> 00:11:19
			the wolf goes after the lone sheep.
		
00:11:20 --> 00:11:21
			It doesn't go after the sheep in the
		
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			flock.
		
00:11:22 --> 00:11:23
			And this is what's happening to the Ummah
		
00:11:23 --> 00:11:23
			today.
		
00:11:23 --> 00:11:24
			People are going out alone.
		
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			They say, I don't need family, I don't
		
00:11:26 --> 00:11:27
			need community, I don't need anybody.
		
00:11:28 --> 00:11:29
			I can take care of myself.
		
00:11:30 --> 00:11:31
			That's when you are most vulnerable to shaitan.
		
00:11:32 --> 00:11:35
			That's when you are most vulnerable to the
		
00:11:35 --> 00:11:36
			elements of society.
		
00:11:36 --> 00:11:39
			When you don't have people around you to
		
00:11:39 --> 00:11:41
			keep you in check, to protect you.
		
00:11:41 --> 00:11:43
			Not just to protect you from external forces,
		
00:11:44 --> 00:11:44
			but from your own self.
		
00:11:45 --> 00:11:46
			From your own nafs.
		
00:11:47 --> 00:11:50
			And so this is a key teaching that
		
00:11:50 --> 00:11:54
			Mustafa as-Salih Rahimallah emphasizes over and over
		
00:11:54 --> 00:11:56
			again in his writings for the rest of
		
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			his life.
		
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			That families are meant to protect each other.
		
00:12:00 --> 00:12:01
			They are meant to be a sense of
		
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			security.
		
00:12:02 --> 00:12:05
			If you have a large family, you have
		
00:12:05 --> 00:12:06
			many members of the family who are there
		
00:12:06 --> 00:12:07
			to protect each other.
		
00:12:07 --> 00:12:10
			If things go wrong, your family will be
		
00:12:10 --> 00:12:10
			there for you.
		
00:12:11 --> 00:12:13
			If things go wrong, you have people there
		
00:12:13 --> 00:12:14
			who can take care of you.
		
00:12:14 --> 00:12:15
			In life, things do go wrong.
		
00:12:15 --> 00:12:17
			He lived in a time when things went
		
00:12:17 --> 00:12:18
			very, very wrong.
		
00:12:18 --> 00:12:19
			Remember this man lived through World War I
		
00:12:19 --> 00:12:20
			and World War II.
		
00:12:21 --> 00:12:23
			He lived in a very difficult point in
		
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			history.
		
00:12:25 --> 00:12:29
			And so he emphasizes the importance of family
		
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			from this perspective.
		
00:12:30 --> 00:12:33
			The perspective of families being a source of
		
00:12:33 --> 00:12:33
			power.
		
00:12:34 --> 00:12:35
			And he argues that they took away the
		
00:12:35 --> 00:12:36
			Khilafat.
		
00:12:36 --> 00:12:38
			They took away one source of power from
		
00:12:38 --> 00:12:38
			the Muslims.
		
00:12:39 --> 00:12:40
			Don't let them take away your families.
		
00:12:41 --> 00:12:42
			Don't let them destroy your family.
		
00:12:43 --> 00:12:48
			Because historically, the Khilafat protected Muslims from outside
		
00:12:48 --> 00:12:48
			elements.
		
00:12:49 --> 00:12:51
			You lived in Darul Islam, you are protected
		
00:12:51 --> 00:12:51
			from Kufr.
		
00:12:52 --> 00:12:55
			Now without a Khilafat, especially for us living
		
00:12:55 --> 00:12:58
			as minorities in non-Muslim lands, what protects
		
00:12:58 --> 00:12:59
			you from the outside elements?
		
00:12:59 --> 00:13:01
			What protects you from being influenced by Kufr?
		
00:13:02 --> 00:13:03
			Your family.
		
00:13:03 --> 00:13:06
			If you have a strong, righteous family, with
		
00:13:06 --> 00:13:08
			a strong head of the household, and a
		
00:13:08 --> 00:13:10
			strong heart of the household, where the mother
		
00:13:10 --> 00:13:12
			and father are righteous and committed to the
		
00:13:12 --> 00:13:15
			Deen, and they teach you the religion, you
		
00:13:15 --> 00:13:17
			are more likely to be protected from the
		
00:13:17 --> 00:13:19
			Kufr that is being bombarded at you through
		
00:13:19 --> 00:13:21
			the media and through society.
		
00:13:22 --> 00:13:23
			Families are powerful.
		
00:13:24 --> 00:13:28
			So the young people today, when they talk
		
00:13:28 --> 00:13:32
			about families being an inconvenience, families getting in
		
00:13:32 --> 00:13:34
			the way of their goals, I want you
		
00:13:34 --> 00:13:35
			to now rethink this.
		
00:13:36 --> 00:13:38
			I want you to weigh the pros and
		
00:13:38 --> 00:13:38
			cons.
		
00:13:39 --> 00:13:41
			Remember, anything you choose in life is costing
		
00:13:41 --> 00:13:42
			you something else.
		
00:13:42 --> 00:13:43
			That's how the world works.
		
00:13:43 --> 00:13:44
			It's always a cost.
		
00:13:45 --> 00:13:46
			Yes, if you choose family, it may cost
		
00:13:46 --> 00:13:48
			you some of your personal dreams, some of
		
00:13:48 --> 00:13:50
			your free time, some of your hobbies.
		
00:13:50 --> 00:13:52
			That's part of the cost of choosing family.
		
00:13:52 --> 00:13:54
			But what's the cost of choosing to be
		
00:13:54 --> 00:13:54
			alone?
		
00:13:55 --> 00:13:57
			The cost of choosing to be alone is
		
00:13:57 --> 00:13:58
			vulnerability.
		
00:13:59 --> 00:14:02
			You become vulnerable to shaitan, to society, to
		
00:14:02 --> 00:14:03
			the government.
		
00:14:03 --> 00:14:05
			You don't have that extra layer of protection
		
00:14:05 --> 00:14:06
			that you would have if you are part
		
00:14:06 --> 00:14:07
			of a family.
		
00:14:07 --> 00:14:09
			If you are committed to a family.
		
00:14:09 --> 00:14:11
			If you and your family get along, and
		
00:14:11 --> 00:14:12
			you take care of each other, and you
		
00:14:12 --> 00:14:13
			love each other, and you are there for
		
00:14:13 --> 00:14:13
			each other.
		
00:14:14 --> 00:14:15
			Weigh the pros and cons.
		
00:14:16 --> 00:14:21
			Do you choose absolute freedom with the chance
		
00:14:21 --> 00:14:22
			that if things go wrong, you are on
		
00:14:22 --> 00:14:23
			your own?
		
00:14:24 --> 00:14:25
			Or do you choose to be part of
		
00:14:25 --> 00:14:29
			a family where yes, there's responsibilities, there's limits
		
00:14:29 --> 00:14:32
			in what you can do, but you have
		
00:14:32 --> 00:14:33
			each other's backs.
		
00:14:33 --> 00:14:35
			You are there for each other.
		
00:14:35 --> 00:14:36
			And when things go wrong, you know your
		
00:14:36 --> 00:14:39
			family are there to take care of you.
		
00:14:40 --> 00:14:41
			And I think if we start thinking like
		
00:14:41 --> 00:14:44
			this again, perhaps young people once again see
		
00:14:44 --> 00:14:45
			the importance of family.
		
00:14:46 --> 00:14:49
			See the importance of being part of something
		
00:14:49 --> 00:14:49
			bigger.
		
00:14:50 --> 00:14:52
			We are not meant to be individuals.
		
00:14:53 --> 00:14:55
			There's a hadith that applies to community.
		
00:14:55 --> 00:14:57
			I want you to take that hadith and
		
00:14:57 --> 00:14:58
			apply it to family as well.
		
00:14:58 --> 00:15:02
			The Prophet ﷺ said, The person who mixes
		
00:15:02 --> 00:15:05
			with people and bears their harm is better
		
00:15:05 --> 00:15:07
			than the one who is alone.
		
00:15:07 --> 00:15:10
			It is better to mix with people and
		
00:15:10 --> 00:15:11
			bear their harm than to be alone.
		
00:15:11 --> 00:15:12
			Why?
		
00:15:12 --> 00:15:15
			Because when you are alone, yes, people can't
		
00:15:15 --> 00:15:16
			harm you, people can't fight with you, people
		
00:15:16 --> 00:15:19
			can't argue with you, but you are vulnerable.
		
00:15:20 --> 00:15:21
			Something happens to you, there's no one to
		
00:15:21 --> 00:15:22
			help you.
		
00:15:23 --> 00:15:25
			When you are part of a people, whether
		
00:15:25 --> 00:15:27
			it's a community or a family, yes, you
		
00:15:27 --> 00:15:28
			will get on each other's nerves.
		
00:15:28 --> 00:15:30
			Yes, you will have differences of opinion.
		
00:15:30 --> 00:15:32
			Yes, you may clash with each other, things
		
00:15:32 --> 00:15:32
			may get heated.
		
00:15:34 --> 00:15:36
			But you'll have each other's backs.
		
00:15:37 --> 00:15:38
			The family protects the family.
		
00:15:38 --> 00:15:40
			The community protects the community.
		
00:15:40 --> 00:15:43
			And that makes it worth dealing with the
		
00:15:43 --> 00:15:46
			inconvenience of the small harms that come from
		
00:15:46 --> 00:15:47
			being part of a bigger whole.
		
00:15:48 --> 00:15:50
			So let us go back to thinking about
		
00:15:50 --> 00:15:54
			families as a source of protection from the
		
00:15:54 --> 00:15:56
			harmful elements of the outside world.
		
00:15:57 --> 00:15:58
			Let us go back to thinking of families
		
00:15:58 --> 00:16:01
			as a source of power that gives us
		
00:16:01 --> 00:16:03
			actual influence in our communities.
		
00:16:03 --> 00:16:07
			Strong, influential families don't just have protection for
		
00:16:07 --> 00:16:09
			each other but they influence the greater community
		
00:16:09 --> 00:16:09
			as well.
		
00:16:10 --> 00:16:11
			And this has always been the case throughout
		
00:16:11 --> 00:16:12
			history and it is still the case today.
		
00:16:13 --> 00:16:15
			We need to build such families in the
		
00:16:15 --> 00:16:17
			Muslim community so that we are influential over
		
00:16:17 --> 00:16:19
			others instead of allowing others to have influence
		
00:16:19 --> 00:16:20
			over us.
		
00:16:20 --> 00:16:29
			وَأَفْرِقْ دَعْوَانًا الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ وَبِالْعَالَمِينَ الحمد لله وحده
		
00:16:29 --> 00:16:32
			والصلاة والسلام على من لا نبي أبعد أم
		
00:16:32 --> 00:16:35
			آباد إِنَّ أَسْتَقَى الْحَدِيثِ كِتَابُ اللَّهُ وَخَيْرِهُ حَدِّي
		
00:16:35 --> 00:16:39
			حَلِّ مُحَمَّدٍ صَلُّ اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّى وَسُلِّمُهُ مُحْدَسَاتُهَا
		
00:16:39 --> 00:16:43
			وَقُلُوا مُحْدَسَةٍ بِنْعَمْ وَقُلُوا بِتَةٍ مُلَالًا وَقُلُوا دَلَالًا
		
00:16:43 --> 00:16:47
			جُبِنَّا Nowadays, the young people are bombarded with
		
00:16:47 --> 00:16:50
			many wrong messages about family, especially through social
		
00:16:50 --> 00:16:51
			media.
		
00:16:52 --> 00:16:54
			Seems like there's a lot of individualism being
		
00:16:54 --> 00:16:57
			pushed on social media, telling people, you don't
		
00:16:57 --> 00:16:58
			need a man, you don't need a woman,
		
00:16:59 --> 00:17:01
			men are evil, women are evil.
		
00:17:01 --> 00:17:03
			All these messages are being pushed on people
		
00:17:03 --> 00:17:06
			to make people hate the opposite gender, to
		
00:17:06 --> 00:17:11
			make people think of marriage as something inconvenient,
		
00:17:11 --> 00:17:12
			something that gets in the way of your
		
00:17:12 --> 00:17:14
			freedom, something that gets in the way of
		
00:17:14 --> 00:17:20
			pursuing your dreams, and we need to take
		
00:17:20 --> 00:17:22
			these topics one by one and dismantle them.
		
00:17:23 --> 00:17:23
			So let's start with one.
		
00:17:24 --> 00:17:27
			One of the ideas that is being pushed
		
00:17:27 --> 00:17:29
			on young Muslim women today, and really on
		
00:17:29 --> 00:17:31
			women all over the world today, is the
		
00:17:31 --> 00:17:32
			idea that men are inherently evil.
		
00:17:33 --> 00:17:35
			This is an idea that is being pushed
		
00:17:35 --> 00:17:37
			a lot online, that men are evil, men
		
00:17:37 --> 00:17:40
			are trash, men are dangerous, you can't trust
		
00:17:40 --> 00:17:41
			men, it's an idea that men are just
		
00:17:41 --> 00:17:42
			bad.
		
00:17:43 --> 00:17:44
			And because of this, a lot of women
		
00:17:44 --> 00:17:46
			choose not to get married, they end up
		
00:17:46 --> 00:17:48
			having bad relationships with their own fathers, they
		
00:17:48 --> 00:17:50
			don't want to have sons, they just see
		
00:17:50 --> 00:17:52
			men as a dangerous and evil thing.
		
00:17:53 --> 00:17:57
			Understand that this concept is foreign to our
		
00:17:57 --> 00:17:57
			religion.
		
00:17:58 --> 00:17:59
			It's not just foreign to our religion, but
		
00:17:59 --> 00:18:01
			if a woman believes this is dangerous to
		
00:18:01 --> 00:18:02
			her iman, why?
		
00:18:02 --> 00:18:04
			Because she thinks all men are evil.
		
00:18:05 --> 00:18:07
			What would be her conclusion about the prophets
		
00:18:07 --> 00:18:09
			of Allah, who are men?
		
00:18:09 --> 00:18:11
			Or the great ulema of the past, who
		
00:18:11 --> 00:18:12
			are men?
		
00:18:12 --> 00:18:13
			Or the khulafa, who are men?
		
00:18:14 --> 00:18:16
			Would she look at them as evil too?
		
00:18:16 --> 00:18:18
			And some of them are doing that.
		
00:18:18 --> 00:18:20
			You will find people online claiming that Abu
		
00:18:20 --> 00:18:24
			Huraira was a misogynist, or Imam Ghazali was
		
00:18:24 --> 00:18:24
			a misogynist.
		
00:18:24 --> 00:18:26
			People are saying things like this today, because
		
00:18:26 --> 00:18:28
			this is the conclusion of thinking all men
		
00:18:28 --> 00:18:29
			are evil.
		
00:18:29 --> 00:18:30
			That you now start to look at the
		
00:18:30 --> 00:18:32
			great men of the past and see them
		
00:18:32 --> 00:18:32
			as evil.
		
00:18:33 --> 00:18:34
			So what does Islam teach us?
		
00:18:35 --> 00:18:38
			Islam teaches us very simply, there are good
		
00:18:38 --> 00:18:40
			men and there are bad men.
		
00:18:40 --> 00:18:42
			There are good women and there are bad
		
00:18:42 --> 00:18:42
			women.
		
00:18:43 --> 00:18:45
			You can't take an entire gender and lump
		
00:18:45 --> 00:18:46
			it like this.
		
00:18:47 --> 00:18:48
			And this is why the Quran says, righteous
		
00:18:48 --> 00:18:50
			men are for righteous women, and evil men
		
00:18:50 --> 00:18:51
			are for evil women.
		
00:18:51 --> 00:18:53
			It makes it very clear, both types of
		
00:18:53 --> 00:18:54
			people exist.
		
00:18:54 --> 00:18:57
			You cannot label an entire gender based on
		
00:18:57 --> 00:18:58
			the actions of evil people.
		
00:18:58 --> 00:19:00
			This is a very toxic way to live
		
00:19:00 --> 00:19:01
			your life.
		
00:19:01 --> 00:19:02
			Because what happens then, even when a woman
		
00:19:02 --> 00:19:04
			does get married, she goes into a marriage
		
00:19:04 --> 00:19:06
			with the idea that this man is evil.
		
00:19:06 --> 00:19:08
			And I need to fix it.
		
00:19:09 --> 00:19:10
			Or I need to keep him under control.
		
00:19:11 --> 00:19:12
			This is not the Islamic approach.
		
00:19:13 --> 00:19:15
			Islamically, you find yourself a good man.
		
00:19:16 --> 00:19:18
			And a good man and a good woman
		
00:19:18 --> 00:19:19
			together, they build a good home.
		
00:19:20 --> 00:19:22
			So don't think of every member of the
		
00:19:22 --> 00:19:23
			opposite gender as evil.
		
00:19:23 --> 00:19:24
			Because Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells us
		
00:19:24 --> 00:19:27
			in Surah Tawbah, that the believing men and
		
00:19:27 --> 00:19:32
			women, المؤمنون والمؤمنان بعضهم أولياء وبعض The believing
		
00:19:32 --> 00:19:35
			men and women are allies of each other.
		
00:19:35 --> 00:19:37
			They command what is good and they forbid
		
00:19:37 --> 00:19:37
			what is evil.
		
00:19:38 --> 00:19:40
			Meaning righteous men and women keep each other
		
00:19:40 --> 00:19:41
			in check.
		
00:19:41 --> 00:19:43
			They prevent each other from doing haram.
		
00:19:43 --> 00:19:44
			They prevent each other from going astray.
		
00:19:45 --> 00:19:47
			This is the foundation of an Islamic community.
		
00:19:47 --> 00:19:49
			This is the foundation of an Islamic marriage.
		
00:19:49 --> 00:19:51
			You are there to keep each other in
		
00:19:51 --> 00:19:53
			check, to prevent each other from falling into
		
00:19:53 --> 00:19:55
			haram, and to trust each other and to
		
00:19:55 --> 00:19:56
			love each other.
		
00:19:56 --> 00:19:58
			And so we must be wary of these
		
00:19:58 --> 00:20:00
			ideas that have been put out into the
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:00
			community.
		
00:20:01 --> 00:20:03
			And we must make sure that we are
		
00:20:03 --> 00:20:06
			having conversations with our young men and women
		
00:20:06 --> 00:20:07
			about the idea that they are being fed.
		
00:20:08 --> 00:20:12
			There are influential men online who are preaching
		
00:20:12 --> 00:20:14
			the idea that all women are evil.
		
00:20:14 --> 00:20:16
			Or that all women will cheat on you.
		
00:20:16 --> 00:20:17
			Or that all women are bad.
		
00:20:17 --> 00:20:19
			This is a completely haram ideology.
		
00:20:19 --> 00:20:22
			Righteous women do not fall into this category
		
00:20:22 --> 00:20:23
			that they are talking about.
		
00:20:23 --> 00:20:25
			They had experience with bad women and they
		
00:20:25 --> 00:20:27
			are labelling all women with this.
		
00:20:27 --> 00:20:29
			And likewise there are women online who are
		
00:20:29 --> 00:20:30
			labelling all men as evil.
		
00:20:30 --> 00:20:32
			And many young people are buying into these
		
00:20:32 --> 00:20:33
			gender ideologies.
		
00:20:34 --> 00:20:36
			So we need to make sure that our
		
00:20:36 --> 00:20:38
			ideology comes from the Quran and Sunnah.
		
00:20:39 --> 00:20:41
			And the Quran and Sunnah makes it very
		
00:20:41 --> 00:20:45
			clear that every man and woman is born
		
00:20:45 --> 00:20:46
			upon the fitrah.
		
00:20:46 --> 00:20:48
			They are born upon natural goodness.
		
00:20:48 --> 00:20:50
			Society can corrupt them.
		
00:20:51 --> 00:20:52
			But if they nurture their goodness, if they
		
00:20:52 --> 00:20:54
			follow Allah, if they obey Allah, any man
		
00:20:54 --> 00:20:56
			or woman can become righteous.
		
00:20:56 --> 00:20:58
			So righteous men should marry righteous women and
		
00:20:58 --> 00:20:59
			build righteous families.
		
00:21:00 --> 00:21:02
			And know all of this noise online trying
		
00:21:02 --> 00:21:04
			to paint the opposite gender as something evil.
		
00:21:04 --> 00:21:06
			This is not from the teachings of Islam.
		
00:21:07 --> 00:21:08
			This is not something we agree upon.
		
00:21:09 --> 00:21:10
			And this is something that is very dangerous
		
00:21:10 --> 00:21:12
			to you and to your Iman and to
		
00:21:12 --> 00:21:14
			your community and to your families if you
		
00:21:14 --> 00:21:16
			buy into these type of ideologies.
		
00:21:16 --> 00:21:18
			We ask Allah to protect us from dangerous
		
00:21:18 --> 00:21:20
			ideologies and to grant us the correct understanding
		
00:21:20 --> 00:21:21
			of Islam.