Hosai Mojaddidi – Questions & Answers With Female Scholars
AI: Summary ©
The speakers emphasize the importance of prioritizing one's life and balancing life with natural beauty of oneself. They emphasize the need for balance between the wife and family, finding alternative spaces in one's own homes to help them grow up in their community, and learning to live in peace. The importance of learning about women and finding alternative spaces in one's own spaces to help them grow up is also emphasized. The Quran is important in various cultures and is a source of knowledge difficult to learn from experts. The Hadith, a woman in Syria, memorized it, and the woman in Syria who received a job and was given a place to stay. The segment ends with a message to join a webinar on the Jenna Institute's programming and a message to thank people for their time.
AI: Summary ©
similar scenario unequal. I'm going to start with because I
remember the question I got before my session by the time the my
beautiful teachers all get there. So the question was, if I remember
very well, is how do you get education as a woman, Islamic
education, as a woman? And add to it, the usual question of balance.
I'm a wife, I'm a mother, I am a working person, I have my in laws,
or I have my house, my parents, you know, this is all reality very
few of us here is like, you know, it's only you, maybe you and your
husband. So what do you go? Where do you start? Anything, you will
make it
a goal and a priority. With Allah's help, it will work. But
you also have to be realistic. Meaning I am not 18 year old in
college studying Islamic Studies. I am not right where I have my 16
hours study from day to morning to evening. No. So you put your
priorities, what will make you in peace, live in peace is when you
learn that everything you do in your home, and at work as long as
Tada and pleasing to Allah with the right intention is your act of
worship. Don't look at cooking to your children, as I'm wasting my
time. I need to be on my set Giada you didn't get it. Because Allah
said, you need to take care of your children, and we need to eat.
However, having said that, I'm not going to spend three hours
cooking, because I'm gonna get tired. So you need to be
efficient. Put your priorities. And as time changes, you will see
more and more time. For example, I always wanted to memorize the
Quran. But I was a resident and OBGYN I did literally 16 to 18
hours a day.
Good luck.
Absolutely. But I knew I wanted and I know Allah will give it to
me earlier.
And I know he will open the opportunity. So the first thing I
did once I finished my residency started the journey, half an hour
a day. Take puts as what you need to do, including taking care of
yourself, of course, and 20 minutes of a study. And what is a
study. There is a passive and there's active, you know, this
way, a passive, you're listening to lectures. Now, this is passive,
you didn't put much effort. You're listening to a YouTube, it's good.
But this is not what will really make you learn. Sit down and open
that book that you don't like.
Tell me about it. Right? And then you have to highlight everything
that you don't understand. And you have to go and read again and
again. And it's a journey.
It doesn't happen. It's there is no Burger King meal. And Islamic
education is how I call it. Yeah, I always say this, you know what
you want to come or the I want to be a half yoga. Then you come in,
pick up the Quran is in your heart doesn't work this way.
Well lucky. I wish it would be very easy. That's why Allah said
we'll Adina Jaha Davina. It will take time, time, time and Sabol
right as as Imam Abu Hanifa it's beautiful statement he said about
his student.
I think it was Muhammad Shaban.
The meaning he was giving a fatwa and he was there and the photo was
not right there at the answer. And he was not giving him yet the
permission to give the fatwa. So he said to him, you want to be a
grape, and you have not even yet a smaller green hospital. The small
baby
grape, meaning it takes time.
And, and this will make you all very happy. If I die and this is
what I said to myself, when I started the journey, if I'm going
to die, Allah knows if he gave me life. I'll continue and he will
reward me as if I finished. Don't give up. Be organized. Don't waste
your time.
woman, woman
don't waste your time, kitchen. Anything I can do in 30 minutes.
Don't do it in 35 You're wasting your time.
Anything is not necessarily don't do it. Focus. Put Allah and Janna
in front of you and see wonders will happen with
Smilla
so the question was about we heard a lot of female companions and how
things quote should be and our reality is different. How do we
get to the place where we're actually supposed to get Subhan
Allah first of all, try it and don't try to do it alone.
Like you're not the only one that's going through this
inshallah we can do it together. Slow, consistent, steady, calm.
Amos builds community, like martial law. We were talking about
the lack of a foundation for 10 years, every Thursday night.
Friday night, sorry, my bad. Friday night, I just moved here my
defects
every week, like I remember in my community, we had a 10 year
holiday every week, that little drop one drop at a time.
Eventually it breaks into the rock Subhan Allah. So that's one thing.
But the other thing just talking because we mentioned about
talking, sorry, having more than one person doing it together. Do
you guys know that I am the Quran that says to female witnesses. For
years, I was like Hello, but why? I never quite understood it until
I was sitting on the board of the masjid. And every time the men
would get into like a big ego flight of who's more manly. They
didn't care that I was sitting there when we were figuring things
out. And we just need to get stuff done. We were just getting stuff
done. But it would turn into an ego fight. I was invisible. And
every time I would sit there and like yell law if only I had
another woman and suddenly clicked on my head and I was like, Okay,
this is a situation which is far more likely to get dismissed.
If people are fighting over the money, and it's a big deal, and
they were supposed to write it down, because that what that is
telling you and they didn't write it down. And now they're bringing
these witnesses and there's one woman and there's one men are like
the women know anything about money anyway. Right? We all know
this. We've all been in meetings where you're like, let's get
lunch. And then Bob says, Let's get lunch. And he's like, great
idea, Bob.
And if you say I said, let's get lunch, you'd be like, okay, but
don't be petty really late, like, who cares about getting the
credit, right?
But then you have a second woman. That's literally they're to echo
what you said the women in the Obama administration used to do
this. They called it echoing. So taking this my friend Sakina says,
Let's get lunch. I immediately respond, say Sakina just said,
let's get lunch. Whether I agree with it or not. That's not the
point. The point is I'm literally lifting up my sister's voice. And
we keep doing this can fit within Kalina. How often has a small
group change something big also 100. But Vietnam, cathedra, like
overcome a larger group. But also the reality is, the vast majority
of people want a healthy community where their families can thrive
where their children can thrive. It's usually just one person
that's just yelling louder than everyone else.
We don't have to yell at people. Anyways.
Organize yourselves. Just just, I loved what she said. But those of
you because many of you, Kim says we listened to you on Tuesday,
Tuesday program started 2007 woman in the masjid only one of them was
me.
And see where you're exactly. I loved it. Persistent, drop by
drop. Don't give up. And don't forget the most important factor.
Allah will help you if your intention is pure, wanders
welcome.
Well, since we're talking about
taking things one step at a time, I'll do use this question. I'll
take this question. Next, Inshallah, which is about exactly
the same kind of thing. Let's say that there was an Ideal Muslim
state in 2020. Hi.
But let's just say right, theoretically,
what would a woman be able to do to be the state head or the
finance minister?
All right, I used to remember earlier I shared about a she felt
right. She thought about the Ouija, who was the first finance
minister in his system? Okay. Now, the question here is, what would
it take? What would it take for such a thing happened? Now this
could be a whole lecture in itself. But what else does the
question say? It says, How is it possible for her to have such a
high position and responsibility while having Islamic
responsibilities, like taking care of children? And I realized, I
didn't tell you in her biography, she has a long biography. Speaking
of long biography, social law, I didn't share with you that in fact
that she was married. In fact, she married twice, and that she did
have children and was a mother as well. People want to know these
details because they matter.
Right? And because it adds multiple layers to who she is, and
how, what the question is asking her. How do you balance this?
Okay, let's let's finish the question, then I'll come to this.
Instead, if I understood you correctly, that woman should ask
help from her husband and her family. But if she's neglecting
her Islamic responsibility if she were splitting, neglecting her
Islamic responsibilities and taking such a high level position.
It depends. Now, I'm not talking about sheep. I'm talking in
general, you're asking me in the current time and age if a person
takes a high level position of leadership, does it automatically
mean that she is neglecting her family or shirking her Islamic
duties and responsibilities?
The answer is, it depends. Because she might.
And she may do very well here and everybody taps her on the shoulder
and applauds her.
So school you go you UW you, all this all this stuff?
All right, that's I'm telling you, this current era is one that says,
You go girl. Whatever you're doing, you go girl. No, you don't
go
in the eyes of Allah subhanaw taala always, sometimes yes. And
sometimes, no, because people can applaud you all they want.
But ultimately, is what does Allah subhanaw taala see when he looks
at you, this is where the circles of priorities that I was talking
about matter. This is why I spent so much time talking about it.
Because you the book that somebody was quoting about the woman, the
Hadith about woman, right, that was banned in Saudi Arabia,
Subhan, Allah and other places I imagined too, but just quotes this
hadith of Bukhari and Muslim.
He says in there very accurately the author, he says, If she
caught, you know, she masters her circles of priorities, there are
no issues with her working in any other of those fields. Of those
circles, there is no issue.
And this depends on each and every person because some people are
excellent multitasks taskers excellent at multitasking, and
others are pretty terrible at it. Some people are terrible
multitaskers, but they have a lot of hands, helping them.
It really depends Subhanallah so if a person is taking a high level
of responsibility and leadership, it doesn't automatically mean that
she's neglecting her family.
It may mean that Subhan Allah, Allah gifted her with the ability
to be very organized, or the ability to have lots of help.
Because any person you look at and you say, Whoa, how does she do?
It? Never asked that question. Because it's never that person
doing it alone. There's always a whole team of people to allow that
leader to do what they're doing if they really are a balanced leader.
Does that make sense? And when they are not balanced, which are
is the case, actually of many of our leaders, you start seeing it
crop up, you see the house is falling apart. You see the kids
are off doing I don't know what you see, the spouse is upset with
this. You see this crumbling here and that crumbling, barren, you
see all kinds of mismanagement, not just in a person, person's
personal life, but also mismanagement of the communities
time and the community's money and the community's efforts and all
kinds of stuff. It all goes together. Subhan Allah, so anyhow,
I invite us in sha Allah to take inspiration from our role models.
And I asked the question in the lecture and ask it again. Do we
question the wisdom of Satan out OMA
for putting she felt allow that we asked the Minister of Finance?
Would any man or woman today question the wisdom of Allah,
He knew she was married, he knew she had children. And he knew that
she was the master of the fit of finances, and the master of the
person who can go into the stupid say, out with you, you don't know
how to do this business transaction properly and out with
you. You are scamming people.
He knew who you chose, why are we questioning this? Shall we get
inspiration from that article?
Click on the question. The number
each one
see how capable we are? We're doing tech right here on stage.
Right?
Yeah, multitask? How did it?
How did it i The question I had was about, you know, the Hadith
and I mentioned that Allah subhanaw taala is he loves beauty,
he is beauty. And then it's kind of a conflict or a conflicting
message that we shouldn't emphasize our beauty. So how can
we balance that? And as my slides as I referenced in the slides, the
point of, you know, be focusing or, you know, the pursuit of
beautification should really be about the inward right we want to
focus on inward beautification. And that doesn't mean of course,
that we don't take care of our exterior. The prophesy Saddam was
known if you study his Sierra, for always looking the best even
though he had very little, he took great care to present himself in
the most beautiful way that you know, meant oiling using oil using
perfume. Always having, you know, again, just the best presentation
hygiene, of course, where did we learn how to do all these things
was from his sunnah. So all of that is to say that, yes, we're
permitted to spend time beautifying ourselves and even
within our marriages, we should right this should be a balanced
reciprocated thing between both the husband and the wife. However,
if that's all you do, or that's your primary
You focus and you placed so much of your value on beautification.
This is where there's a problem. And in this society, this is the
toxic messaging that we're getting as women, that you have to be a
certain size, your hair has to look a certain way your skin has
to look a certain way your eye color, you should be at the gym
everyday. And you see a lot of women I was telling them, actually
the other day, my son and I drove to the supermarket early because
we had to get milk. And it was after fajr. And, you know, we
hunted I had prayed, and then we stayed awake. So when we left to
go get milk, it was still you know, dark outside relative, so
somewhat. And so I just I saw a bunch of people in the street
running. There were a lot of activity at this time, right? So
very blessed time. Fudger. But you could see that a lot of the people
were up doing what they were out there, focusing on right the
exterior. So they're doing their exercise, and then I saw one guy,
he was putting something in the trunk of his car. And when he came
out, he looked like he had just come from the gym, you know, he
just kind of had that gym. Look, you look sweaty red. Okay, so I
was like, he must have just come from the gym. And I said,
subhanAllah and I told my son, I said, you know, it's amazing that
so many people will wake up really early in the morning, to go to the
gym, they will go out of their way to go to the gym, they'll they'll
wake up from their sleep. To do that. They'll wake up from their
sleep, right to straighten their hair for one to two hours. I know
people who do this, it is their morning beauty routine to wake up
super early. So the gay get there, whatever, you know, they're
ironing there. What is it called? I totally forgot now they're
flattering and thank you they're flattered and ready, and then get
their makeup ready. You got to of course shower and do all that but
there's all this beautification, but they won't pray, they don't
pray to Allah, they don't they, they just don't pray. So this is
where we have it backwards. So the point again, is we are permitted
to beautify ourselves but priority has to be inward beautification,
character development, making sure we're ridding ourselves of the
diseases of the heart, making sure we're learning and studying the
seed of the process and the son of the process of implementing that
being people who embody as much as we are able to the Quranic you
know, the Quran in our in our words and our actions. That's real
beautification. So
I hope that's clear.
Yes.
Okay.
I did, I didn't get through all of them.
So one of there's quite a few questions. And so one of them was
asking also about,
in what ways can sisters help the African American community and
African American Muslim from the basket question. And I think that
the first piece is, is really self education, you know, about
learning, the history, the gaining knowledge and things like that, so
that it can help to change the narrative that had been given to
us whether it's in schools aside to wherever we got than there
would have been wrong families, is to alter the narrative and that
comes with with retraining ourselves first. And the other
piece too is that begin to change the way that we may look at our
sisters or African American sisters might come in and look at
that in terms of a positive aspects that we are contributors
to Islam, were contributors to our community more so than we may have
thought before. So that part is really important.
And there was another question about the social justice aspect of
it. And I think there's one piece around really
also being mindful of yourself and your health with really getting
into the social justice movement and things like that and helping
with an African American community is being mindful because that I
was speaking with someone earlier who came to me to speak before it
can be really draining when really looking at a lot of those
pressures and the negatives that happen and so we focus on focus on
Islam focus on a lot of homeless and homeless slum in our in our in
our health and knowing that we can't do it all you know to pace
ourselves
so I will hand it over to someone else and then I'll come back
around to me to answer some of the other questions thank you
so now the handler was last night a lot also the the the question is
our local Masjid three of them all run by the same board don't offer
any support for sisters events, they don't allow us to use the
masala
is our conference rooms to hold women's gatherings? What do you
advise? How can we facilitate such gatherings with such a big push
back?
Many of us have experienced this and others a hamdulillah code MCC,
and that is the solution, masha Allah Hamdulillah, we see that we
see that market difference of being able to have, you know,
going to the masjid and reciting Quran together, having your
children grow up in the masjid. It's a very different experience
for our children to be able to see their mothers coming and learning
and, you know, knowing other woman, my husband was telling me
that one of his favorite memories of being a kid is just going with
his mom and running around the masjid and just experiencing the
masjid in that way. And that's very interesting, because a lot of
us, you know, we're in the women's section, and we see children
running around, and we're like, we can't concentrate on the prayer,
because there's so much noise. And so there's all these different
aspects of, you know, womanhood, that that converge into this one
space. And when we don't feel like we even have the opportunity to
experience that space with our other sisters, of course, it's
very hurtful. And when you've already spoken to the board, and
you've already written letters, and you've already sent emails,
and you've gone to the board meeting and you've spoken to the
Imam and nothing is changing, I would recommend two things and I
know that the scholars here have way better suggestions, inshallah
they can give advice. But the first is, don't let go of your
connection to the masjid even though you have pain. And that's
been really a journey for myself and I know many other women who,
you know, we need to separate the difference between this is the
house of Allah subhanho wa Taala and I come here to worship Allah.
And this is my, my, my space of connecting with other believers
and helping my family connect with Allah subhanaw taala and then any
negative experience I may have, that's where I go into my sedge in
my sujood. I go to Allah and I asked him to help heal me and help
heal my community. And of course, therapy is very helpful,
especially if you can work with a Muslim therapist, Morriston is
here who can help you process why those things are so hurtful
sometimes. So when on a personal level, don't let go of your
connection with the message. If the message is open to women,
don't let go of it. The second thing is, they might be open in
the prayer hall, but that doesn't mean that they are open to you
having social gatherings or religious gatherings. And if you
want to hold your Holika in the masjid, but they're not opening
the doors for you. I would recommend two things one, find an
alternative space, it can be your own home of sister that I know and
in Santa Clara holds open halacha in her backyard. You know she she
publicizes IT people know her address. And women come all the
way from Berkeley I think some of the women here even come all the
way from Berkeley just to be able to be with other women and a
woman's backyard and that speaks to you know, as panel how
committed women are to seeking knowledge and being in spaces of
worship. So one is finding alternative spaces. But the second
is you have power in your message it you're you yourself are a
donator or maybe someone you know is and you can speak with them and
say you know I would like to donate this amount to the masjid
but it's contingent on women being able to have religious classes in
the masjid. So you put that pressure on the board from a
financial space that you know, the message is for all of us, myself,
my children are not going to be able to learn if you are literally
saying we cannot have piranha lockers in the masjid. So we are
not going to be giving this money here. Instead we're going to rent
a room and you know, random facility to be able to have her
own Hello fellas. So either this money goes to the masjid and you
allow us to worship in the masjid or we're gonna rent out a room in
an office space, excuse me. And we're gonna give that money to an
office space so that we can feel safe, where we worship together
without feeling like we are not welcome. You have power to do
that. And you have the resources to be able to do that. When you
you. Think critically about the ways that you do matter. You are
necessary for the masjid even if you don't feel like you are even
if you're made to feel like you're not. And how can you help them
realize that at the end of the day, they may never realize that.
And that's when you go back to point one, that you still go back
to the masjid and you pray for the healing of yourself and your
community. And maybe it's time to find a different message in your
locality where you do still have that connection but in a different
place.
So
this question is a tough one. So I'm giving you a warning.
It's very practical. It's very common. So I'm going to read this
so I give it Deray how do we as women, especially getting married
young, and questioning both cultural and religious
understanding of Islam, navigate the definition of karma.
That usually is explained as quote unquote, wife has to be obedient
and turned
for financial support from husband,
and that's, that's the extent of the role.
What is the way we as women should understand this role men play? And
what does it look like to obey as a wife? This needs our whole next.
No ideally mean this, this is going to be the next one. Because
we agreed that we're going to tackle every sensitive issue.
Because if we are not going to be talking about it, who else is
going to talk about it?
Right. And we need to, in general, this is very difficult, this
couple of things in Islam. And I'm saying this as a woman, it's very
difficult to under woman. What is the second one?
Very difficult. You don't see it in this country? Because it's not
allowed.
Polygamy? Yeah. When I was in Saudi, this was a huge issue.
Because it's very hard for the woman. So come to reality. Number
one, you need to understand what is Kolomna? And what is the
requirement for a woman in general, when I shared with you
the story of Seda Heisha, right. How did she respond?
And there's nobody stronger than say Dasha,
if you if you really read her biography, right. She stood up for
her right? She speaks her mind. She acted as a wife. She was
jealous she planned. You all know this, right? The motto hurry, Ma
Ma Ma Ma Lola. Right? How did she respond?
Was she an obedient wife?
answered me.
No, or Yes.
Yes, what's your week?
Was she submissive and let them say whatever they say. What can I
do you know he pays for me.
What did she do?
Turn to Allah, this is what we are missing.
I need to understand what is karma? I need to understand where
does karma apply?
Does Allah expect me to be the obedient wife? Yes, to certain
extent is not an open invitation. Otherwise, Allah knows our ability
and our limitation and marriage will be honestly almost
impossible. But is it also exactly what you just said? open
invitation? No for everything this is your mind trick you know the
5050 rule.
You don't know the 5050 I'm not gonna say it in public
so we don't want to go to the extremes. Now you should probably
know it's it shouldn't be the extreme he does this it does this.
If he doesn't do it, I'm not doing it. That's not that's not going to
work. What the Hadith I had astral in my mind but the time didn't
allow in any cell Asha are encouraged. That's hadith of rasa
risotto Salah and you translate it as the following. The women are
but partners of them of their men.
So here you go. What does it will take if I am going to give him the
Hawala
because Allah told me provided he is qualified to do the poema. The
5050 the joint account is not a Kolomna
be my father Allah who bought the home you need to read the Quran.
The Kurama is because he spent on her there is no 5050 there is no
joint account. If you are the richest woman, it's your money. If
that's how it is in your home, then yes, you obey Him as long as
there is no disobedience to Allah.
As long as there's no abuse. It's not a yes and no right away. You
know, the culture is telling us No. And we think it's done. Tell
us Yes. And that's where the conflict, you need to learn. You
need to be patient and need to navigate. And you need to put your
mind the goal after pleasing Allah, can I save this marriage?
Can I be this woman? We need to have a lot of talk about marriage
before they get married. The UN I'm sure Toronado
Aranya knows this, the percentage of divorce in the Muslim community
is getting very close to the non Muslim.
It's 47%
I had a woman came to my house, knocked on the door, gave me the
invitation and says please make dua so of course I'm making this
please make dua they stay married.
What lie I was like SubhanAllah. So Kawana has a requirement from
the man has a requirement from the woman is not do or don't the other
one, what does Allah expect from us, us as obedient wives toward
the husband, one because we want to please Allah, but that usually
gets dressed up
In a cultural baggage, which is so true, and I'd like to understand
the actual expectation to not feel guilty, this is definitely going
to be our next. Yeah, because this is a long subject. So in sha Allah
Allah knows make dua to Allah subhanaw taala allows this to
happen. This, by the way was started in November, in a simple
conversation.
And she said, really? I said, Sure.
And here we are Subhan Allah, and may Allah reward you for all
coming because he made it a reality does aka malarkey. So
inshallah next time we'll tackle another she is by the way, we have
to
acknowledge she was the one who wrote the descriptions.
It was beautiful descriptions really, really, I mean, we talked
about the subject but exactly, you know, the best, the better the
equal, so may Allah the word.
So there was a question about just books in terms of like learning
about women, there's the women around the prophets lace I love
there's a, if you want something that's deeply philosophical, the
Tao of Islam, the source book on no shoot it, the Tao of Islam,
it's discussing a lot of the Sufi ideas of like, what is womanhood
mean, is a woman in my soul, a lot of those discussions, she actually
wrote it from an Eastern perspective, because the western
perspective was apparently too difficult to work with where she
was saying, like, I would go through all of these discussions
on like, you have to understand the Islamic ethos for you to
understand how and why these rulings come about. And it was so
difficult that she's like I have to come, I have to literally cross
the ocean come from an Eastern perspective, to be able to explain
it. But I do want to say a lot and 100 Latin, I'm so grateful for
female teachers. We have just as many female teachers in our
communities as we do men, we just don't value their scholarship in
the same way. We don't have a lack of this. And this is on every
subject like I learned about like structural racism because I asked
aunties on the master. I went to my aunties, and I said, I know I'm
at like, also when you make a mistake, and someone schools you,
thank you thank them for the free education.
Because I didn't, I didn't know things. I didn't actually for a
good chunk of my life. I didn't live in America, I had no idea.
And then I would like meet other sisters don't know those come to
the Halacha.
Please teach us because how are we going to support each other if we
don't know each other?
And we don't value the scholarship that we have. I just I know I'm
tangental. But there was a discussion on polygamy.
I think it's important for us to make sure that we are putting it
again within within its context. The prophets lie Selim married a
number of women after the Battle of what they lost 7% of their male
population in a day.
This was a devastating day. And the story is about the Battle of
God, it's very difficult to get through them with without just
sobbing.
The Companions children, although Allah and home would come out and
call for their fathers and cry when they didn't hear a response.
They knew what happened. So the prophets I send them started
marrying a series of widows.
When you look at a community that's under attack, because
you're living in peace, you don't judge a community that's living
under attack.
Communities at war, I differ from communities of peace. And I want
to say this because Polygamy In in America is far more common within
the black community than it is in the immigrant community. Because
one in four black men between the ages of 18 and 28 is in prison or
on parole. This is a community under attack. And this isn't to
say it's a blanket statement. Not every woman is willing to live
with it. Some women regardless of their backgrounds. In Yemen, it's
actually very common like my my sister in law's neighbor was
trying to find her husband, his second wife, just like a miter saw
like her. This is the craziest thing I've heard in my life.
Different cultures do different things a women in Makkah, were
willing to accept that the women Medina weren't the prophets I send
them difference. I did insulted the women of Medina by taking more
than one white for Medina. It wasn't a part of their culture.
And all of that is fine. We don't I just want to make sure that
we're not judging a community at war, that is under attack, the
same way that we would judge a community in a place of peace. If
Allah has gifted you something and hamdulillah don't look at your
sister that's in a different situation be like Oh, but I'm
better. Ask her what the experience is like she might enjoy
her marriage or more than you ever dreamt of.
And let's talk to some of these sisters. sounds so amazing and 100
Allah may Allah bless you
thank you, thank you Ramona.
All right. Mashallah, this question hum did Allah they're
super so many questions and so many beautiful questions. How on
earth are we going to do these, this all be for naught? I have no
idea. So we're going to do our best we're going to consolidate.
Take another round of one more round maybe before about
It comes in
it's tiny.cc backslash,
reimagined questions.
Excellent. Your neighbor has 100 All right. Alhamdulillah this
question here reads, some of the women that were mentioned today as
examples can be viewed as anomalies. Okay, I love this
because as soon as I read it, I was like, Uh huh. I knew somebody
was going to ask this. I knew somebody was going to say, oh,
yeah, yeah, I know. But those are the greats.
Does this actually apply to me?
So the question goes,
Are they were women who were present in the time of the Prophet
sallallahu, ala he was sending them, which is also a very common
thing that people say, but they were Sahaba yet, who are we? Okay,
hang on. And we are not debating that they are the best of the
generations. This is clear from the Hadith, however,
or that it continues, or they were so hobby, yes, you got that? Or
they were so special and better and us better than us, that they
are at a different level that we will never reach. How do we talk
about this? I'll tell you exactly how we talk about this. The reason
we decided in this, or at least in my talk, I decided to bring
examples of the Prophets wife. And examples of the Sahaba was
specifically because the topic itself had to do with the concept
of my topic was stay at home, do women shouldn't woman stay at
home? And I was giving examples because people are going to say,
Is there proof in the prophets era, that woman did more than stay
at home? I said, Well, who better than the very woman of the
prophets era. So la Allahu alayhi wa sallam, and his very wives did
one in Lohani him to actually explain. But that does not mean
that in all of Muslim history, that there weren't so many example
sisters, you have to hear these stories and understand that they
were so many of them ubiquitous, to where these are not anomalies.
They are not. And I'll tell you, and this is why I'm so happy to
say that because anytime I get to share about Damascus, I love it.
Because for me, for me, I had the honor of being able to see this in
real life. The people who are present I don't know who was in
the Holika on Friday night a couple of weeks ago, I got so
frustrated, so not with the sisters, but with the questions
that people ask about, where are the female scholars, and I would
explain an explainer. Finally, I just said, You know what, I turned
off my green screen behind me and there was my bookshelf, right? And
I just pointed out my bookshelf. And I said, you see these shelves
over here. You see these shelves behind me? There were rows and
rows and rows of books. I said every single one of these is a
modern currently living,
or just a recently deceased female scholar. You want FIP you want
Hadith. You want the clear outs of Quran you want to shoot you want
Sita you want everything. It's all right there on the show. Oh, and
they were all wanting to have to mess in one place. When country?
What if we added to it all the countries of the world? futsal
Bartok Allah, what you said was so true. We may not know the woman
scholars.
Because sometimes you know the auntie who is in the community,
who will you learn structural racism from and nobody calls her
the doctor will stop bla bla bla,
with honorific titles, but she has more knowledge on that topic than
anyone else.
Right? And then what about all of our teachers that actually have
knowledge and either we don't know them simply the gems the hidden
gems of our community? Or they don't have a platform, which is
what my foundation is a platform for all the women have said this
to speak from
a hole they don't have a whole organization backing them or
massage at opening their doors to them. Or that simply, we are so
used to just like the question about the Quran apps, and
listening to men who are ready to put on beautiful recitations.
We're so accustomed to listening to a man reciting put on we've
never even heard a woman recite put on Subhan Allah, right. And so
let me just tell you this, these are not anomalies. Back to the
question.
What I saw Subhan Allah was a beautiful story of balance. A
story of women who had if ALLAH blessed them with a spouse were
married, and from those who are married Appollo bless them with
children were mothers. But every single one of them without
exception, whether she was a wife or not, whether she was widowed or
divorced, whether she was single or never married, whether she had
children, 10 of them were one.
They had one thing in common always.
They were dedicated to the knowledge of the stone.
They learned their Islam. These woman It doesn't matter. The
primary level was they all have memorized.
Every single last one of them had ages and put it in and then there
are those who want
Further up and memorize the Hadith. And eventually got you
jazz is in the all the books of Hadith. And those who became the
10, Asha, put it out of Quran, right and on and on and on
SubhanAllah. And we're not talking in the ones or 1020s or 30s
anomalies, we're talking in the hundreds it was a whole movement,
it was beautiful. It still is these are currently living people,
though they may not all be in Damascus today make up for Syria
in all of the countries of the Muslim world and the world. By
extension. The reason I'm sharing this with you sisters is because
we tend to think of anomalies. Let me tell you after I came back from
studying Syria, one of the trips back, I had actually spent so much
time studying with women teachers, and at a young age, I was a
teenager when I first started, I went to my first mixed Yanni mix
doesn't like that, like woman were on one side and then we're on the
other side program. It was a month long, intensive Dean program. And
I was like, Oh, this is interesting.
They were all male teachers actually quite a funny story.
They were all middle teachers. There wasn't a single woman
teacher and I'm like, I don't know. Anyway, I'd never really
heard too many male teacher speak whatever. So each one was getting
up and giving his lecture each one's giving up give his lecture.
And after like a day's worth of this, this shows you how now even
kind of silly I was still very young. I'm sitting in the front
row. The problem is I'm sitting in the front row.
I listened to each of them, each of them, each of them, Okay, call
us we have a whole they weren't the male teacher speaking
beautiful teachers, Mashallah. And finally, I turned around to the
sister sitting on this side of me and sister sitting on the side and
I said,
How strange. They're all men.
I said, you know, they're not so bad. We're just not as good as the
woman teachers.
The sister sitting next sample will not forget the look on their
faces. They looked at me like what planet did you just come off that
you don't more women, teachers and scholars, that is the weird
anomaly that the male ones are speaking.
That was my reality. All of the women were teachers. Oh, all the
teachers that we had a woman Subhana scholar scholars and
hamdullah Allah allowed me to keep going back to Damascus, I did
study with the men in the shoe as well of Damascus. Beautiful,
Mashallah. But something special about that, to where you can take
a young kid and put her in a program and go who was strange, no
teachers, shall know. Right? Right. I had a friend very similar
story tangent here. But she had lived all her life overseas. And
so her hockey team was all woman, all girls in a Muslim country.
When she moved to Canada.
They went to their first like official hockey game. And so you
know, when you when you have the mask on, and you're everyone's
playing, you can't see if they're a male or woman, a man or a woman?
So eventually took their helmets off. And she goes, Oh, well, there
have been
exact same reaction. It depends what you saw. It depends what you
grew up with. It depends what you were able to look gave you the
ability to see sisters, these examples are not anomalies. They
are more ubiquitous than we think. And they absolutely can and should
and will be you and your daughters Inshallah, tada.
Okay.
So there was another question that came into the chat that asked
about the exam that I talked about the licensing exam. And so this
one sort of just, it's a long one, just ask about.
The question is, is race basically about racism and how I saw the
lens of it when looking at I'm really paraphrasing the question,
because it's a really long one. And about what, you know, if White
people read the question that said, Oh, what's exemplifying
white people. And they feel horrible about that on the exam as
well. And so the writer talked about.
It's better to think about, basically about, but I think
Empower African American community comes from a place of talking
about great things that I'm then have done a focus on the positive
mental shift alongside strategically fighting against
racism. And so basically, I think, the piece when I'm surmising from
this is really focusing on the positives that happened within the
African American community versus the struggles on the pain. We need
both. And so we have to acknowledge the pain and the
torture that happened in this country for over 400 years. That's
a real thing. There is still suffering that comes because of
enslavement and the torture that happened in this country for
African American people and realize that those people were
Muslim. Many of them that came over, you know that were forced
into enslavement. Were also Muslims.
So we're reverting back. So it's not necessarily looking at the
negatives of it, I think we need to look at both.
And look at the positives and the powerful achievements that has
happened and had some happened. Like, unlike Hidden Figures, we
talked about some folks that saw that movie about the strength of
women. And even like the sister was just speaking about many of
the scholars, many of the scholars with that did a lot of the writing
to also come from African countries as written in the
language and Wolf, you know, and spoken in the language of
Bournemouth. So we look at both, I think both is important. And in
the we sit with ourselves and are what their own souls about hearing
and learning things that are painful, and wanting it to go away
and move past it. That goes back to what we talked about with rates
neutrality. And that adds to another question that came in
there. And about cultural humility was another question that came in
there. Cultural humility, is the piece about, you know, being
humbled and learning what it is that we don't know? And moving
ourselves to learn more, and be humble about that? So we need
both. Yes, there is the positive and the beautiful parts about
African American history. And there is also the pain that is
happening right now today. Because if we, if we are blind to it, then
it adds to that piece about race and colorblindness. And that
becomes detrimental and very painful. Whereas books become also
supporters of depression, rather than those who are fighting
against it. So it's a combination of both. And I think I answered
three questions in one.
I think I can show
you Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, sure. Thank you. Perfect.
Thank you. So I had, and again, we apologize for not being able to
get to all the questions. There's so many that I wish I could
answer, but we just don't have time. So I'm going to choose this
one that I really think I can speak on, because it relates to
an experience that I actually lived through. So the question is,
we understand that one can still have Austin tation, right, which
is really a disease of the heart where you show off, right? You're
you're performing basically in order for it to be seen
that we can have a ostentation, when people purposely go out of
their way to not look boastful. Do you still have ostentation, if you
go out of your way, to not look too good around certain people. An
example is we're basically wearing a mask around men are purposely
dressed and purposely dressed with not the best attire around certain
people out of fear of judgment or being seen by them. So the
question again, that I'm hearing here is, is it still really yeah,
if you're trying to basically, you know, kind of tone down your
dress, so as not to attract or to appear a certain way right to
whether it's men or other people. And so I feel like this question,
I just, again, can speak to it, because many, many years ago,
before I even knew what the term ostentation was, which is like a
It's a mouthful of a word. Or yeah, we hadn't studied the
diseases of the heart. I absolutely had it, I just didn't
know I had it. But a big part of my focus was on the outward and so
wearing certain clothes to not be perceived, you know, as as
attractive or, or just to look intimidating was absolutely my
game, I went out of the house with the agenda to intimidate people to
look scary, to not be judged, you know, for for any physicality or
anything else, and to send a message, a strong message. And I
thought that that was, you know, something pious, I actually
believed that it was an act of God to do that. And I've told this
story before, but I don't know how many of you have heard it. So I'll
just quickly tell it because I think it for me, it was a life
changing moment for me, and it just made me It helped me to shift
focus, but I've told the story. So if you've heard it, you can leave
if you want to, I don't want to anyhow, I was this was many years
ago. And so as I mentioned, I used to dress like all kind of military
style in a way head to toe black and I would walk around with like
a grimace and just like not be very pleasant, because I wanted to
intimidate people. So I was at the airport waiting for a ride. And
this
you know, I'm just sitting there people watching waiting for my
ride dressed again, head to toe like that. And a woman she parked
her car right across the street. I mean, on the you know, in the in
the where all the cars are coming, and she parked her car and then
she got out of her car and she's wearing a tank top and shorts. And
she's you know, white, I'm assuming white American woman but
she she was dressed very scantily and I just immediately just judged
her and had a lot of negative thoughts, let's just say,
completely judged her and this happened to me. She closed
trunk of her car. And she looked right in my direction as if she
was piercing through my soul. And, you know, you make eye contact
with somebody who you're just judging, you know, that's not
comfortable. If you've ever done that before, when she did that,
and then she walked directly towards me. And so as she's
walking towards me, my heart is like, you know, because I'm like,
What is this, this is kind of strange, why she coming towards
me, and will lie, he she did that she came and she stood in her tank
top and shorts, shorts. And I'm sitting there and she, she put her
head down, and she said, said I want to go.
Last words I ever thought I would hear from someone dressed like
that. And she had so much humility, I actually, she had her
head to hand, the low the whole time, pretty much she was talking
to me. She's like, I know, I'm dressed so inappropriately, but I
am Muslim. And I want to raise my son, Muslim, and I saw you and I
thought it was like a sign from God, that I come and talk to you.
Because I want books. She's like, I need resources for my son. So
she's saying all this stuff. And I'm just sitting there, like
completely floored at what just happened because I know the
internal dialogue I was having in my head. And of course, Allah
knows what I was thinking. And he sent this woman to me, he sent her
to me to teach me a very, very serious less than a day, which is,
who do you think you are? Right? You're walking around, as though
you are the personification of my face. And you judge people and you
think you're better than people. And that's who I was for a really
long time. And that day, I learned the lesson. I am nobody because
that woman I'm sure was was far better than I was in that moment.
And I had to sit with that it was like I say it was like a punch to
the gut it was but it was a huge awakening for me that my focus was
on the wrong thing. I was focused on the outward so RIA is a disease
of the heart. Where in both cases where you do something to be seen,
or you don't do something to not be seen. It is real, because the
focus is on people. Our focus has to be on Allah subhana wa Tada we
don't act for for to be seen or to not be seen to be judged and I'll
be judged, to be accepted to not be accepted. That is not the state
of the believer, because people can benefit you and they can't
harm you. Everything is from Allah subhanaw taala so the believer
understands that and that's why if you're going to dress a certain
way, do it for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala don't factor in
people, do it for the sake of Allah and He will give you Tofik
Inshallah, just like well,
I just wanted to share since we only have one minute, I will have
time to answer the I won't have time to answer the actual
question. So instead, I'd like to share something Subhanallah when
we're talking about the, you know, legacy of our amazing and
incredible African American brothers and sisters, I want you
to know that we have a international debate Quran
competition, where every country of the world comes and competes
and we've had three winners from the United States and all of them
are African American. Subhana lat we have Allahu Akbar Allah Who a
club in spaces of Quran which is where I do so much research and
women reciting Quran mashallah on the app that we have coming out in
sha Allah we have woman put on recite are so many from Nigeria,
from Cameroon from Guinea, Michelle from the Gambia, and
Masha Allah, their re citations are not just beautiful
recitations, they're also reciting the Iran act. So you're gonna hear
we citations you've never heard before and you don't understand
and I'm gonna have just play one of them for you Inshallah, as we
end just to give you a glimpse of the depth of knowledge, because
this isn't just oh, I go to the masjid and I memorized it from
hearing someone, the level of this knowledge is so powerful and those
of us who are not black, we have so much that we owe our brothers
and sisters our brothers and so how you so beautifully spoke to
this May Allah bless you to recognize the fact that we who
those of us who are not black the privilege that we have, and also
to recognize that the reason we have so much privilege is because
of the sacrifices and the pain of our brothers and sisters from the
African American community but the scholarship that we have from so
much of eastern West Africa is just so powerful in our in our in
our history. So I want to end because of panela listening to
this, it will inshallah blow you away. This Chifa Zainab ze Lani
she is a like mashallah happy though with so much constantly a
constant winner of Quran competitions and I want you to
hear something different than you may have heard before. I just
mashallah there are so many of them. We need to get to it. This
man that
shame on you Raji.
This
18
The dean who led the IBA J
ma he was
further behind because
that should mean in one minute Can you explain what just happened
the first day of just that what happened to why did she say all of
those
in between Yes Why does she say the last one and the first one
because she's just connecting the two pseudo sorry I just that I was
sucked into the rest of
it I'm doing that I'm sorry I'm actually out of practice. Remember
to add but mashallah, like at the beginning of the surah what she
was doing was Imana so like the Jenna, Dre or Jaya, they're all
different recipe.
Sorry.
Michelle, okay. Actually Do you want to answer can you income?
No, no
no, he was salatu salam ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa
sahbihi wa salam.
Mashallah, so different types of presentation. So, some of the
presentations they have Imola
and they don't say the word with feta, the way we say it in house,
so in house we say Asia,
but it means a sequence says Jaya, so, he makes the Emera. So, this
is one of the one of the ways that different between the garage and
Pamela Eonia. There are so many differences, and
Imam Shafi be the among one
collected all the differences in the Quran, all the and he calls it
haruf. So when you say half, it means that it's read differently
from one researcher to another. Sometimes they agree on certain
ones sometimes they do differ. Some researchers say and nice.
And some of them make foolish bear for the med. They will say either
Jah six, some of them say four. So depends. It's a whole science. And
Ma sha Allah the more you learn about the Quran, yeah, the more
you think that you know nothing.
And actually, this is about all the sciences of Islam. So Pamela
Sorry, no Bismillah some of the researchers for example, Hamza
Radi Allahu Allah and consider the Quran as a whole. So he doesn't
read the baesman some of them do six different ways, or five
different ways. How to connect the sewers.
So for example, I'm going to answer this in a little bit of
detail.
Let's take
well, a ball lien Bismillah R Rahman Rahim, Allah Flemmi.
So some of them would the first rule is to separate the three
positions, they'll say, Well, I'll bow on li
Bismillahi Ra, many Rafi
Elif last
me name
you separate.
Then what you do is you connect Bismillah R Rahman Rahim to the
beginning of the next
Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim me Elif
me, blogger me
but you never connect.
When when you start the Quran you never connect out to be laying
shit on regime to Bismillah R Rahman Rahim so that the one who
doesn't know the Quran would not think that I was Bismillah R
Rahman Rahim is at the end of the first surah.
So and then you can connect all of them together in some some
researchers also do sect between the two aisles.
well above all clean Bismillah AR Rahman AR Rahim
actually the sect without Bismillah so that's wrong. Let's
connect them together
one of both orally, le flash
me
so different ways of reciting Hampton
Maha Akbar Allah Hooke but thank you so much, Anthony. And, and
speaking of and this is a wonderful note to end on.
I still need this one. But a wonderful note to end on as we
wrap up our conference in sha Allah is that
the recitation the 10 recitations of Quran, honestly, is something
that is a science that we need to continue on. So philosophers notes
on if anybody here actually has worked on their Quran worked on
their hips worked on their toes made, keep on working with a
tenant put off and if this I mean, we kept to keep on putting the bar
pretty pretty high or shall not to keep on attaining it. I just want
to end with saying one of the wonderful modern like current day.
I say modern and current day martial law, woman scholars that
I'm very blessed, mashallah to be aware of and to know of and
actually study from her books, is somebody by the name of unsay.
summitted Asha, who's written an amazing multiple volumes on the 10
little ads where she takes every single verse of the Quran and
breaks down each and every one of the 10 deflator ads and tells you
the differences. And then they say that there isn't actually a book
so many of her books are so unique, but there isn't actually a
book quite like this, that many people have been able to move from
their hubs of flight and to learning the attendant that adds
because they were able to follow her method. She was also the same
person Marcelo, she has memorized all the books of Hadith and has
books an amazing book where she actually puts in
all it is is like, for those who memorize all the Hadith. Imagine
you just memorize the Hadith, which is itself an amazing feat.
You also memorize the Ananda, which is like on so on, so on, and
so and so on. So um, so right, Colorado, so the Los Altos lambda
center, exactly, and she has these like shortcuts, which are all
pictorial.
Little picture shortcuts of how do you memorize all of the Hadith and
who was in the center
of the slide of the Hadith, I mean, it is phenomenal, masha
Allah, and many, many books, there is a book that is translated of
hers, under the title gatherings of illumination, by Dr. Fatih on
Salem, who translated the book, and it's a book of dua. So since
we're entering into Ramadan, this is when you can go online onto
Amazon and actually order it. And it's a beautiful book where she
brings together the put Anik drawers and your Hadith dewasa the
prophets Allah Lysa num, and other doulas and actually there's other
compilations like this but this one is done by a woman Masha
Allah, and it's a very beautiful compilation of laws. So add to
that to your library in sha Allah, I end this inshallah with more
inspirations. And by the way, she also ran the entire heavy school
for woman in Damascus, Mashallah. I mean, this is beautiful I met
and one more thing I keep on talking about her. She had
students that would come from all over the world and I met mashallah
our chef who gave us the ijazah in put it on in touch with him a
whole lot law, he would have a certain people who are given
permission to give full ijazah because usually what you do in the
ministry of Syria, of the
for the Quran, is you have to go to the person with the shortest
Senate and there's only so many of them, and they were all men. And
most of them wouldn't take on woman, teacher, woman students,
and Subhanallah it's sometime maybe it was in the 70s or 80s or
so some of our teachers were able to finally ask and agree and
convince actually went to the youngest of the five of the
plethora of Shan and he said, No, no, no teach women. They went to
the next oldest.on Teacher, they thought the youngest one would be
more modern. No, no, no, no, no, no, until they get to the eldest
of them.
And subhanAllah our teachers upon all the one we were blessed to
receive ijazah from took on students and and hundreds I'm
talking about in the hundreds, and then into the 1000s of women who
received the Joseph put on from Syria and the anti Joseph Syria is
the strongest and the strictest so people would come from all over
even after they finished put on elsewhere to get the one from
Syria. This teacher so somebody that I'm telling you about. She
had full permission to give the full ijazah on her own. Like
that's how strong her Quran was. And I met Michelle I will never
forget this. One of the housemates, I was on one of my
last trips was somebody from Turkey. And she finished that day
her
Are you jazz have put on she went to go get tested and they give you
this beautiful roll certificate of your ages of put on with the whole
Senate and who the teacher was who the ship wasn't who the teacher
was. And she was so excited not only because she received the job,
but she said look, look on the very corner, it tells you what
number you know, because they issue right? Certificate endowment
based certificates with numbers. Which number are you and these are
in the 1000s of 1000s of these each, as was Michelle law, her
said number one,
because hers was the very first given from ancestor mother herself
from the woman, teacher, Michelle law, beautiful, beautiful 100 And
I hope to inspire you these are all currently living amongst us
women scholars, may Allah bless them and us. And I'm telling you,
whether it's a sister from Turkey or whether it's myself or whether
it's all of us, I think all of us would agree or all of you were
just ordinary people, folks, we're ordinary people that Allah
subhanaw taala allowed for and blessed. And you and us in sha
Allah can be extraordinary in Allah subhanaw taala as eyes would
you make the commitment, make the intention and the doors start
opening Subhanallah and then be community and sisters for each
other. And sha Allah with that I'm going to end and we'll have our
melody prayer together. There are a couple of housekeeping
announcements to us. I'll say after our ending here with some
lalong mod so you get to know him megawatt early. He was he was
selling them. I want to thank all for your time and your attention
today. Hamza Dilla, and everybody was online. Welcome Mashallah.
We're so happy to have you please continue joining us on the
foundation on the Jenna Institute's programming all
throughout the week in the months. And with that, my dear sisters
will close in sha Allah with our dua nun to Shobhana Kanak nominal
volume in
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