Hosai Mojaddidi – Purification of the Heart for Muslimahs (Monthly Sisterhood Halaqa Part 6)
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I was in a,
I was walking with my son in target. And we were, you know, I
had a cart and he just told me, Mommy, look at this, he was
showing me something. So I turned around for like, I don't know,
even five seconds, maybe. And by that time a woman with her, she
was, uh, she had a stroller, she walked past me and I almost hit
her. I didn't I didn't even come closer. But I almost did. And I
was like, Oh, I'm so sorry. And she just looked at me so harshly
and gave me that like, like, maybe look up disgust. And I was like,
Oh my God, it was like the most innocent thing and it was like
bias. But you could tell like she was just so angry. So you have a
lot of angry people out there and you know, the biller, but the
point being is, you know, we have these different aspects to our
being. And, you know, we in our faith, we don't believe that, we
believe that, that the intellect has to be nurtured, it has to be,
you know, it can overcome right if you with knowledge with as I say,
knowledge is power, right? With knowledge with proper
understanding, you can overcome both your appetites and your
irascible soul and, and have proper, you know, in conductivity,
you can have people who are civilized and actually conducting
themselves the proper way, but that needs to be nurtured. And so
we don't have this idea of original sin, but we do have the
responsibility is on parents of children to be able to give them
this, these tools, right, so that they can overcome their neffs.
Otherwise, what do you have you have,
you know, if you if you don't teach your child to restrain
themselves, if you don't teach your child to not give into every
impulse, or every desire, they become very dangerous as adults,
right. And this is, again, the world that we live in, you have a
lot of, unfortunately, people who did not have parenting, they did
not have to be they did not have a parent or anyone really present,
to be able to teach them how to practice restraint. How Not To Say
whatever's on your mind, you know, there's a lot of this,
you know, these notions in our society to just speak freely, say
whatever you want, do whatever you want, give it to every desire
every whim. And this is now normal. That's the normal message
if you if you practice abstinence, for example. I mean, I work with
youth all the time. And I hear this all the time. If you're
abstinent from certain behaviors in this society, you're considered
the strange one, right? You're considered, you know, weird. Yeah,
proved prudish, or they're square, right. There's something wrong
with you. And that's why peer pressure is real, right? It's a
very real thing. That's why a lot of teens are afraid to disclose,
and specifically teens have with a faith background. There is immense
pressure not to talk about their faith openly, because the backlash
will be so severe, you know, you'll be ostracized you've been
made to feel like there's something wrong with you. So this
is because the predominant culture believes that you should just give
in to whatever you want to do all the time. Whereas our faith is all
about teaching restraint. I mean, somehow, so much of what we do, is
to inculcate restraint. And so it's a very important
quality to have. So I'm glad that he
goes on to say we're almost done with this. He says on page eight
if you're if you're reading along
this matter relates to the fact that the heart is a spiritual
Oregon. The unseen aspect of the heart contains a bad seed that has
the potential of becoming like a cancer that can metatag
metastasize and overtake the heart. The bacterium responsible
for tuberculosis, for example, lives latent in the lungs of
millions of people. When its carriers age or succumb to another
disease that weakens their immune system, tuberculosis may start to
emerge. This analogy illustrates that there is a dormant element in
the human heart that, if nurtured and allowed to grow, can damage
the soul and eventually destroyed the promise of a lion instead of
stated in the son of Adams sins, a black spot appears in the heart,
and if the person repents, it is erased, but if he does not, it
continues to grow until the whole heart becomes pitch black.
Incidentally, this notion of associating the color of black
with sin is not racist in its origins. This attribution has been
long used even among black Africans who are
refer to a person who is wretched as black hearted. The Quran says
about successful people on the day of judgment that their faces
become white. In chapter three verse 106. This does not mean
white as a hue of skin. Rather it refers to light and brightness,
which are spiritual descriptions not associated with actual color.
A black person can have spiritual light in his face and a white
person can have darkness and vice versa depending on one spiritual
and moral condition. The Abominable Zadie considers
ailments of the heart to be part of the Adamic potential, he
believes one is obliged to know this about human nature, in order
to be protected. Other scholars simply consider these ailments to
be predominant in men. That is, most people have these qualities
but not necessarily everybody. It is interesting that a Mahmoud says
it is impossible to rid oneself of these diseases completely. This
implies that purification is a lifelong process, not something
that is applied once and then forgotten. purity of heart never
survives a passive relationship, one must always guard his or her
heart, there is a well known Hadith which states that every
child is born in the state of fitrah. Many Muslims translate
this into English as every child is born a Muslim. However, the
Hadith says fitrah, which means that people are born inclined to
faith with an intuitive awareness of divine purpose, and a nature
built to receive the prophetic message. What remains then is to
nurture one's findra and cultivate this inclination to faith and
purity of heart. So
that is the section on Introduction to purification that
we just finished out. Are there any questions? Yes.
Online my line of thinking,
and this book is also relating to the heart and the heart.
So do you have any idea? How would you like to share a few words
about why blood is stressing on heart and size?
That's a very good question as I go ahead. And so just for those
who are watching, the sister was asking about how, in the monarch
context, we're often, you know, focusing a lot on the mind and
thinking and the intellect as a mental process. But then, in our
tradition, we always focus on the spiritual heart, right? So how is
there a connection? So if you look at the beginning of the book, I
don't remember the exact page. But in the translators, introduction,
there's a whole discussion on this, it's really fascinating,
where Showhomes actually talks about the connection, that there
are, in fact, neurons right in the heart, right, so that there is a
communication between the mind and the heart, right. And so it kind
of he's bringing in all of these more modern ideas together to show
the relevancy that, in fact, the heart and the mind are
communicating and there is a deep connection there. So I would
definitely say read that. Yeah, of course. Yeah, you read it, he
does, obviously, much better job explaining it. But I can read one
section here. He says here, the dominant theory states that the
central nervous system is what controls the entire human being
with the brain as its center. We also know that the nervous system
does not initiate the beat of the heart, but but that it is actually
self initiated, or as we would say, initiated by God. We also
know that the heart should all of its connections to the brain be
severed as they are during during heart transplant continues to
beat. And then he has much more commentary on the fact that we do
you have Oh, only recently have we discovered that there are over
40,000 neurons in the heart.
So it's a very lengthy, much more lengthier discussion, but I would
say read that and it'll it's very insightful. Subhanallah Yeah, but
an excellent question just like you're located
Subhan Allah, but I've always thought about that too. Like
because we hear so much about you know, the heart and so how's that
so I found that really enlightening mashallah Yes?
been honest with yourself and having a shame for
admitting, to be honest, openly admitting to Allah
and not
within their Catholic tradition, there's like confessions, right?
We will have confessions, we don't confess things to a person to any
kind of like cleansing things. But
like, where is the importance or place for having a teacher who can
show ourselves because we might be looking at ourselves and ourselves
in the mirror, but sometimes a teacher, or even just a sister, or
someone else can say, like,
actually,
you got this smile?
But maybe not on our own.
Excellent question. Mashallah. So, I, again, these are all questions
I've even had in the past as well. So how about but you know, this
idea that, yes, we, in our tradition, we don't have, there
isn't an emphasis on trying to seek out
you know, another human being to confess our sins to but there is
absolutely a value in having a guide or a teacher because like
you said, we can be blind to our own faults to our own blemishes.
Right. And so that's why in our, you know, traditional Islam, there
was always a focus on having a guide, a spiritual guide, a
spiritual master, someone that you can turn to for that type of
artwork to help you to do that hard work. And if you look at, you
know, so the hangman's rope, who, who talks about, you know, the, in
his in foundations of the spiritual path, and if you look
at, you know, the agenda to change our condition, or shelves, any
man's aid also are talking about how to transform oneself there,
there is always the emphasis that if you can find a spiritual master
look for one, yes, but if you can't, then what do you do? Right?
What do you do then? And so people have to really, if they're able to
seek out a teacher to have that relationship with that would be
ideal. Because yes, someone who's already on the path who's been
down this road before can certainly help facilitate, you
know it for, for you, but also to be able to, you know, see certain
things that you don't see, like the Hadith, you know, moment to
moment, right? The believer is a mirror for the believer, so to
have, someone who's got the knowledge and has the ability to
see in you certain qualities, or just to help you along is really
important. But it's not always easy to find that person. Right.
And I think that's the challenge that a lot of people have today,
because we don't have as much tea, as many scholars or teachers as
accessible. As previous people, you know, were just a few
centuries ago, you could find massages, and, and teachers and
guides everywhere, but nowadays are very hard to come by. So then
the question has been posed, well, what do you do so our scholars say
that the, in the absence of a spiritual guide to do that for
you,
the silhouette would be a spiritual guide, like the that to
have the practice of doing at least some say 300 to 500
silhouette every day would be, as I guess, you know, would would be
in placement of a scholar for you in that it will start to you will
start to cleanse with it, right, as opposed to having someone
necessarily point things out to you, the purification process will
happen by way of the silhouette. So that's kind of, you know, the I
think for, for most people today who don't have access, that would
be the recommendation is that you just start getting in the habit of
doing that Salawat, that cleansing process of, you know, seeking
Allah subhanaw taala through that exercise, and then the effect of
that would be you're polishing that, that heart, you're polishing
it from the disease, and inshallah you'll come out, purified. But if
you can, of course, it would be best to seek someone who's on the
path and ask, you know, they would help you along, or in even group
settings like this. I mean, I think it's, like I said, why I've
always felt that this was so important, because one on one, it
might be difficult, but when you come in spaces, right, where we
all have a common goal, and we're all like helping and I mean, I've
been in so many of these other places where you can see and
people will come to me afterwards and it's like, there's, you know,
these light bulb moments that happen, right, these moments of
like real realization, these openings is what we would call,
you know, for data like there's spiritual openings that happen
even in larger gatherings because when you read something, someone
says something, someone share something and then Subhanallah you
know, you feel this transfer this inner transformation happening. So
there are different ways
To get there, I guess, but ideally yes and other person would be,
would be ideal. I remember in the very beginning of our
studies 20 something years ago, some of the sisters and I, we, we
were doing this work together. I mean, I'm really aging myself, but
it was a long time ago. And over 20 years ago, right, and we
decided, I remember a group of us that we were going to come
together just for the sole purpose of telling each other what we
thought our diseases were. And I was like, man, we were really bold
for for opening up that conversation with each other. I
mean, it definitely bonded us because it's not easy to hear.
Right? So what do you think my diseases are we that was the
prompt. So what do you think my problem? So what do you think my
diseases of the heart are? And then you have someone else like
plan? Oh, you know, that's not gonna go.
The nurses really, it hurts, it hurts to hear that, right. But it
was, like, insightful. I remember a very good friend of mine, she
told me something that to this day, I will not forget it, she
said, your problem is, is you think you can control things.
And it was insightful, because, you know, I never thought of
myself as a controlling person. But I think what she was trying to
help me see is that you need to let go.
You know, don't think that you can control outcomes. Because like,
when you're if you have like a fixer mindset, you know, like, I'm
a fixer mindset. So I'm thinking always, like, Oh, if you do this,
this should happen, right? So you kind of get in this very logical,
you know, mindset where you think you have the answers to things.
But she pointed that out to me, and it was very done very
delicately, but it was, it was always something that I reflected
on, like, that's, I didn't think that about myself, I didn't know
that. But she was watching and witnessed, you know, kind of
picking up on certain things and benefited me because I realized,
she's right, i No matter what you do, you cannot control outcomes.
You know, we could all conspire together and have the best plan.
But if I was probably doesn't want it, there's no way it's gonna
happen, you know. And that's, I think, a really good spiritual
lesson to learn. So that's the benefit of having good company,
and good teachers, if you can have them is that they will.
Because there's direct Naseeha. You know, there's direct, like
what at what we did, but there's also indirect, you know, knowledge
of being transmitted indirect, no, see how being transmitted,
you know, that, that you'll pick up on just really subtle things,
because people have added most of me more. So I've been very blessed
to be with really amazing sisters, and also some of our male teachers
and brothers. And I've always found one of the consistent things
is the best teachers that I found don't come right out and directly
correct you. They won't like, make you feel the embarrassment of what
you're doing. Right. But they will indirectly, very, like nudge you
in the right direction, in a very gentle way. And then later, you'll
be like, Oh, I know what they were doing.
I see what they like to do, you know, yes.
No, disease, and you're working on it, but you can't get it. Like
when I think of example, getting back my children, I told myself, I
am not going to yell today. I'm not gonna say that word. I'm not
going to emotionally abused.
There we go.
That's a very good question. And I think all mothers, we can relate
to that we all have had those conversations within ourselves. I
think, you know,
in my experience, I found that when we focus on the behavior that
we want to have, right, which is like to be really to not do
certain things, we might be overlooking the source of why we
do it in the first place. And to me, that's more of the focus,
right? Why do you have a meltdown in the first place? Why do you
lose your cool in the first place? Because if you can get to the root
issue, right, and source that, and then resolve that I feel like then
you don't have to worry about the, the rest will kind of follow
through. But what we tend to do is just because we feel so guilty,
it's a very guilt driven impulse, right, be like, I'm never gonna
yell at my children, because we feel bad. But if you, for example,
and I've mentioned this before, but I think it's worth mentioning.
Like, I because I had to do this for myself. I like I when I my
kids were small. I was like, I told my husband I'm like, there
are times where I feel like I'm losing control of myself. And I
don't like that feeling because I've tried to be very controlled
like with my emotions, with my words. I try to be controlled. So
I said when I
Feel that wave of like, you know, frustration building up, it's like
welling up within me. You know, I need you to support me and know,
right? To how to support me. So for example, and I'm totally
putting it all out there now. But like, in my family, my husband has
always done the nighttime routine for my kids, right? Ever since
they were young. He just that was his thing he wants to do there was
put them to bed. I'm like, that's fine. Good. I've been with them
all day, please, take them. But there was a point where he kind of
got a little loosey goosey. You know what I mean? Or like, it was
way past their bedtime. We late and then you know how it goes, Man
have two boys. It's not a very busy like loud household, but
they're still rambunctious at times. So around 10 or 930, or
it's my time because I always tell him nights are mine, I need my
quiet time, I need peace, I need to have certain things I want to
get done. I don't want to hear noise. I don't want to hear
running around. I don't want to hear fighting in the bathroom. I
don't hear none of it. You know? So I told him I said, if I find
that my nights are being encroached on or like, you know,
you're taking my time, I'm gonna start and I feel. And so I said,
if you hear me one time, say, because I'll call his name either.
Like, why are the boys still awake? Or why are they still up,
like, that's your cue to know what to do, then please take care of
it, like nip it in the boat. Because next time, it's not going
to be pretty, you know. So I had to kind of give him all these
guides to pay attention to my cues, you know, and once like,
even with my boys, when I started letting them know, pay attention
to my tone, pay attention to how I'm speaking, because I don't
yell, I really try not to yell in my house. But I have, we all you
know, I think lose it. And I hate when I because then I get
frustrated. I say I don't. It's like a rule I have for myself that
I broke. But I didn't break it because I wanted to. I broke it
because no one's listening to me. So once I kind of communicated my
needs, and I feel like I really sourced the issue, which is, you
know, the Knights need to be controlled better, and I need to
have more rights, like more, you know, things just handled better.
I feel like it got better, right from that point forward. But if
you don't speak up to the source, I feel like then you're just gonna
keep, you know, each time it's gonna, you're gonna keep losing
it. And then you you're the one that sits with that guilt, and you
keep beating yourself up, and it's just as vicious cycle. So maybe,
for all of us if this applies, to try to figure out what is your
trigger? Is it the noise level that bothers you? Are they
disobeying a direct request? Okay, and then that's the next question.
Why? You know, because I feel like, if you can get to why are
they disobeying even that, like, what is it? What agreement can we
come up with? And even for my kids, for those who are parents, I
think it's really important to teach your kids the art of
negotiation. Like I went with, I taught my kids, I said, we need
to, you need to learn to negotiate, which means if I have a
request, and you have a problem with that request, and you have to
convince me, you know, but I want this to be a mutually beneficial
exchange, not just like,
giving a command. And that's it, because I feel like kids will
respect your wishes much more, if you empower them to negotiate
terms. Right? And if you can do that, and teach them to do that, I
feel like you won't have the struggle of why aren't you
listening to me as much? I don't know. That's just my philosophy.
But I hope that answers or helps. Yeah, it's difficult, but don't
beat yourself up. And also pay attention to your cycle. Because
we're, it's real, our cycles absolutely impact us. I feel like
we have to do a much better job as women, to advocate for ourselves.
If that's if your hormones are, are part of it. Like if you know
yourself that you get much more irritable and agitated around that
time, advocate for yourself, like my kids know, I've run a household
of boys so they know it is my time or it's about to be more diverse
that way. You know, I'll give them mornings. And I think they
appreciate it because they know Yeah, yes.
To out of the conversation.
I was
back when she was speaking earlier.
But it's also worked through your heart. That's how I
was trying to like
taking the surf as well saying, Oh, it's always his fault
and I love to chill out
Okay, no, I'm allowing myself to feel upset.
He's like learning it. He's looking up to me.
So my actions.
So trying to, like Sydney forgiveness in front of him, like
I did something wrong. And I wanted
to, like, reflect on myself, and how,
like, not only what he's your children, but what I'm doing to
allow myself to get to that point.
That's an excellent point. I do think it's really important to
mention, like, the different stages because your son is how old
though?
Yeah, see. So when they're younger, it's like a different
type of right mom guilt that we have. And then when they get into
the teen ages, it's like, it evolves into something very
different. But it's a really great perspective. Because I think for
parents of younger kids that ability to be self accountable to
realize like, I'm the adult, right, they're younger, I need to
model good behavior is really good, like you said, for the
purification process. And then as they grow older, it is, I think,
kind of doing that.
Just sourcing how we can communicate better, right? Because
I feel like, you know that you're now dealing with many adults, they
learn to talk back more. And you don't see, yeah, it's just a
different set of variables. But I think, but in both cases, I always
try to tell them, be gentle with yourself, because I don't think
unless you know, a woman really has some anger management issues
or real problems, I think most moms, we really try our best to
give love and to be the best versions of ourselves, but we lose
it. Because something else is being supported or when we don't,
we don't feel supported. And in some other part, maybe trying to
figure that out.
Me for it was
like a lifelong journey.
And when I interact with my parents, and also trying to serve
on our job and my own shortcomings, which you know, I'm
still working on too. But I think involving family is really
important, really wish everybody
the children and the parents and the grandparents and everyone who
was in the house kind of like going on this journey. This is
kind of a presentation on the hardest, these are the
you know, the next few months are going to have conversations about
this. And it's very helpful because what I do lose my temper,
and I can have that conversation later.
Like, hey, I lost my temper, I apologize, I should have done a, b
and c. And, you know, whatever, you can have an open ended
conversation.
Because I was a teenager.
Like if I have that opportunity. If I saw my parents come to you
and hey, I'm sorry, I lost my temper, or hey, I'm so sorry.
So that's how you handle
hopefully?
No, it's very helpful. And it's excellent, excellent advice, I
think, really, really relevant to bring your family members into
whatever you're working on. Because language is effective,
right? So if you haven't shared language around these topics,
which is what you're speaking about, and also even temperaments,
like, understanding your temperament and understanding your
children's temperaments is really helpful, because what it does is
it validates, right, everybody, like, we're all on an equal
playing field, right. And that's why I love this topic for children
too, because it humanizes them and humanizes us and like you said, as
an adult, I can tell them yeah, I've gotten this disease and mom
is working on this, and I need your laws, and I need your
support. And please make it easy for me. And we can kind of all do
it like you said together. And so it's very excellent. And so you
had a good reminder for all of us that whenever when when we're
dealing with our family, whether it's spouses, parents, children,
to not individualize some of these things, like there's certain
things like prayer, da but I think when it has to do with real
you know, like a process like this, where you're trying to
become a better version of yourself and really trying to, you
know, embrace a new like all these virtues and character qualities
that you want. You should want to be including your family in that
process. So
is a very, very good reminder just like
Thank you. That's
well, yeah, I'm sorry as a yes.
Yeah, in a marital context, because in a or with it because in
a marital context I've found, I really think we have to, I mean, I
know the language now is so bizarre around gender and the
differences between men and women, and I don't, I'm not going to go
there. But I feel like, we've got to come back to reality and
realize that there are differences between the way men and women
process information. And a lot of times men, they don't retain some
of these cues and guides that we give them because they're visual
learners, oftentimes. And also, we have like, these emotional
attachments we make to some of these conversations. So we're very
emotionally involved. Whereas with men, it's information. Right? So
it's like, if you're trying to give information, you know, or
like, relay something to a spouse, then kind of understand it from
his lens, which is, this is information and how do you best
retain information, especially if he's juggling a full time job,
he's got all these other things going on, sometimes visually. So
like, a calendar would maybe it would be helpful, right? Which is
like, These are the days where I need this time off, or please, or
my, you know, my cycle is coming on this, I'm just letting you know
ahead of time, because that is information, right. But it's just
thinking, like, oh, I told you, you should know. And then be in
tune with me and be sensitive to me next month, and the month after
and the month after, not at your sudden format have to fail, trust
me of that it doesn't work. But when you give them a hit, like
ahead of time, or like, like I said, even there's apps now where
you can share like, okay, just let you know, this is the next week,
you know,
be forewarned, and you know, the drill. And then you can even make
a wish list of things that you request, and just send it like a
text message. You know, here's my wish list for this month, you
know, then that way it's information and they can process
information much better than the song and dance that I think a lot
of women do, which is like how could you forget? And then we get
all like emotional and then they're like, What what happened
You were fine yesterday and now you know, you're not talking to
me, I'm out in the cold. So because we, we put too much
expectation on them to be in tune with us the way like a girlfriend
would write like your friend or your sister. Because we're so
emotionally connected. We may empathize and because we have the
same context, we can feel right. But men have a very different
process. So I think just understanding those differences
will help.
But excellent questions and comments you guys Machala, someone
confidence because
according to my husband's like you're just
given to you
mashallah,
that's a very good question. So some, I think women in general,
we're conditioned to deflect compliments and praise. Because
many of our cultures and even families may have taught us that
you're being arrogant, you're being conceited. If you take a
compliment, if you you know, take ownership of something like who do
you think you are? And so we don't want that negative association. So
we just kind of, but there is a healthy balance and the best way
is to recognize that when someone is giving you a compliment, too,
don't deflect it entirely. But redirect it right to Allah subhana
wa, because whatever good you have is from Allah. We weren't born
with anything like virtue of our own. Right it's all from a lesser
of a coworker recognizes some work of yours respect, thank you very
much, but in your heart of hearts that have been in our sugar Lila,
don't let it seep into the heart where now you think like oh, I'm
so amazing because my coworkers you know, gave me some
recognition. But in your heart of hearts recognize that it's all by
Allah subhanaw taala that you have to fearfully you have success that
you have the family, the upbringing, the opportunity, the
means to be able to do whatever you've done, the skill set the
faculties it's all from Allah, and to be able to just redirect that
praise to Him is healthy way
At still accepted so that you don't belittle yourself, right?
You never want to belittle yourself and also in a
professional context to that might harm your career, right? And a lot
of I mean, there's entire books written especially on women and
how they don't advance because of this tendency. So it does in many
ways harmless, but if we can learn to accept it in the moment,
without making this big production, like, Oh, thank you so
much. I'm so wonderful, but just like thank you graciously
accepted, but then in your heart of hearts, I have to deny Alma,
thank you so much sugar. And that's that's a good way to stay
balanced.
Okay, hamdulillah Thank you. Does that go okay. So we are going to
stop for a moment of prayer and then we'll be back here for the
shadows.
All right. Bismillah R Rahman Rahim Al hamdu lillah wa Salatu
was Salam ala should have an MBA when we're sitting. Say that our
Mowlana What have you been a Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam while he was certainly a son of this demon Kathira salam Wa
alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh welcome everyone and Hamdulillah
we are so honored and excited tonight to be able to host yet
another shahada here at MCC I've lost count to be honest of how
many we've had Michelle lottomatica Allah may Allah keep
continuing to increase them and we have one or more than one every
single day in sha Allah. But we're very honored to have our dear
brother, our young congregant Brother Yes, seen here who I was
just informed. This is his second facilitating his second shahada
this month so our young congregate yes scene has mashallah is doing
the hard work. He's out there and he's doing this hard work and he's
mashallah reaching the hearts. He's brought his dear, I think
best friend or close friend, Romeo today, and I'm gonna pass the mic
on because apparently, they have an incredible story that I'm
really eager to hear. So I'm going to ask rather your scene to go
ahead, he's also going to facilitate the shahada, which I
love, it's beautiful their friends, this is going to be a
memory for a lifetime that they will have Inshallah, so you're
seeing please welcome us to or share with us your story. This
will last and I want to cinematical.
So basically, the story began yesterday,
last night, and like around five o'clock, me and I got decided to
call up Romeo, I wanted to go ask him about something right. And
then the conversation just eventually evolved into, like life
in general. And how like, today's society, there's so many issues,
you know, issues of masculinity, men are not really men nowadays,
how the world is influenced by like, corrupt people. And then
slowly over time, I just, I started to like, I told him me
about Islam, and how it fixed every single one of these issues.
1400 years ago, these issues of like, masculinity, I told Romeo
about how, right yeah, how, like, it's not cheap to tell it to be
true. Yeah, like just blew my mind. Yeah, yeah. So I told Romeo
about all that, right. I told Romeo about how you should stop
playing video games. Stop.
Stop watching all these movies. He's wasting of time, right? I
told them how slim it makes you constantly improve every single
day, every single day, you just want to be a better person every
single day. You want to get closer to gender, right? So I just told
them about that. I told them I like and Islam. The whole like,
concept of is like consistency. You're always consistent. You're
consistent with your prayers, you're consistent with your like
your thicket, you know, and consistency always like leads to
success if you know what you're doing. And subhanAllah I told
Romeo that he wants to seek the truth and Romeo's he really did
and I was like all right, I want you to look at the Quran. And
Subhan Allah has shown my video and they explained about the
mathematical you wanna explain how you felt about that? Yeah, yeah,
he told me the watch this like 13 Mini minute video that basically
explained it. So I watched it ended up part of the video. It
mentioned how basically like everybody that's read the Quran,
Quran sorry about that.
They shed tears and I was like that's that's wild. So I
I listened to the first 15 verses of it. And
it was so crazy like I actually started shedding tears from and I
was like wait, I don't always use mind when I was like
I'm still like really shocked on my bad but that but it's, it's
wild is fun a lot. Show them the first 15 verses of Surah Baqarah.
And then basically talks about how like this is the book for those
who want guidance, right. And Romeo's, you know, he wanted the
truth. He wanted to speak the truth. Unlike the majority of
people today. Romeo like he on
Honestly like wanting to seek guidance, it did not want to
reject it. He did not want to like waste time. You know? And because
of that upon Allah, Allah made me the means of him to be guided. He
will explain to you what happened like last couple weeks school, you
know? Yeah, you want to Okay, so basically
it was eyebrows
so like, what happened was a lie. You know, I just I felt really bad
that I knew about Islam. I felt really bad about like my non
Muslim friends, how they don't understand that you don't get it.
And it like it will lie I broke my heart. Right. So like, I remember
sometimes at night, I prayed to pray and I would always ask a
lodge to do it. You know, I'm sasco Allah, you know, guide my
friends, guide them to the truth guide them, make them see the
truth. And then Subhan Allah, you know, Romeo at this, yeah, like,
like, out of nowhere, like, I just started thinking about like the
truth more, and
I don't I don't even know how to explain it. Like it was just, it
was just weird. Like,
I was just living my normal life in like, one like, the middle of
the day, randomly, always. I just started thinking really deep. And
I was like, I don't I want to start like working. I want to
start like, making my days more productive. I don't want to just
like, kind of do nothing most of the time. Like I was starting to
get tired or doing nothing.
Yeah, I was just like, I was like, roaming, I felt bored of life. You
know, I've always felt like there was something even more out there
more and more greater than me. And then salon online, you know, like
me and Romeo just connected. By the way we hadn't at that time.
Like when school ended, right. Like in like, what May June 1, we
had to speak. I haven't spoke to Romeo since like yesterday, and
like a month time.
And then immediately me and him clicked right away, right? Out of
nowhere. Yeah, I didn't know where we like a deep discussion for like
three hours. Right? Just talking back and forth with I can't
remember everything but like, it was just so mind blowing. You
know, Subhan Allah.
Like, and even Aikido? Yeah, it was
that conversation, it was also really nice to connect with him
for all the things we're talking about. Because there's only like
one other person that I'm actually friends with, that I'm actually
able to speak about, you know, like society and like, just a lot
of deep things. And
it was it was just like a really nice conversation. Like, really
nice, mind blowing conversation. Yeah, and, you know, because,
like, again, majority of our age group, you know, they're just
like, they know, they're not men, you know, they're not true men,
you know, they don't think they don't want to use their brains.
They're just, they just want to play on their PlayStation all day.
They don't care about knowledge. And so upon a life you just like,
let them go outside, you can see like, the beautiful world, instead
of that, you know, they rather like stay home, waste their time
on like Netflix movies, nothing that benefits them. And when I
realized this, like it really like it just killed my, it killed my
hopes for like, you know, I just I hated it. I was wasting time. It
was just it was killing me and I hated it so much. And I wanted to
seek truth on seek knowledge. And then like will lie. And like after
that I just started learning more and more about Islam. I started
learning about the masculinity and manhood over civil law somehow
based on them, and how he's like the perfect role model. Right?
Yeah. telling him about him and spot on the line. Oh, yeah. You
want to explain how the miracle of the Quran how Muhammad cannot read
or write
So, normally, I was talking on the dinner table, how, like, how Stark
you were that Muhammad SAW? He could not read or write, but he
came up with something like the Quran. Yeah.
When he was when, when he was telling me this yesterday, about
that, I
I'm, like, still kind of speechless on it. But yeah, that
was literally my reaction. I was just, I was just speechless. Like,
I didn't know what to do.
I didn't know what to say, like, at all, I was just speechless.
Like, I still am a little speechless right now. Like, kind
of like my back for that. But, um, it was just, yeah, like I said, it
was really nice conversation. And it made me want to, you know,
learn more about this and I want to
every night actually, I was gonna listen to I'm gonna listen to the
15 verses of the Quran every night. And I already did one
yesterday. So
you know, Hamdulillah you know, like, well, I like the only one
message I just want to give to people out there is like, you know
what, Brotherman here said that Muslims are like the biggest
criminals out there. Because like, we have the truth. We have the
knowledge, but like a bunch of us, especially the youth. They're like
ashamed of it.
they're ashamed to go pray, they're ashamed to say I'm a
Muslim, they're ashamed to grow the beard or change, like do
anything. And then like, you know, will lie and said, you know, like
the Japanese, they refuse to wear it to the Muslim men, they refuse
to pray, they refuse to like to do anything because they're
embarrassed. They have this inferiority complex. They think
like, you know, that we're lesser than, like, these non Muslims, so
it's just completely wrong. Like, because we have the truth, you
know, like, we're being criminals here. Rasul Allah sought to summon
like, you know, out of a, he replaced a trust amongst us,
right, that every single one of us become values, every single one of
us to spread the message of style. Because we all have that
capability. You know, like, a lie. You know, if it was if it wasn't
me, like, if it was any other muscles, Romea would have came to
the same conclusion. That's the beauty of Islam. But like, most of
us, like, we just refuse, you're just embarrassed. And like, it
says, it's sad, because you know, a lie, we have the truth, you
know, like, why do we not want to spread the truth? Why are we
embarrassed by it? Why are we like, you know, lying to
ourselves, you know, it's messed up, you know?
So,
like that anything
I'd like to talk about this morning. Okay, go ahead. So, last
night, I couldn't really sleep for a minute because
of everything that he told me I should hours to, like, just really
just mind blown. Like, I literally just couldn't go to sleep, like I
have so much energy for no reason. And I was just so sick, like, I, I
couldn't go to sleep. So I think I ended up going to sleep at like
one o'clock. And I woke up at six. So I didn't I didn't get like too
much. I didn't get like, too good. Like usually I get like, I'm like
eight or nine hours asleep.
You know, because I try to get good hours asleep. But this
morning, I woke up like,
like, I've never had that good of sleep and like weeks and No, no,
not weeks, months. Like, like it was actually mind blowing. And
then. And then he called me. And then he was like, How do you feel?
I was like, Dude, I haven't had this good sleep in a while. Like,
what? And then he was like, Yeah, that was like the same thing for
me. Like, I had like two hours of sleep. And I still felt like, I
just I just slept really good now, dude, that's like,
it's hamster.
Like, he really we really experienced the same thing. Like
it's so
it's wild. It really is, you know.
And, yeah, another thing that another thing I'd like to add on
with that is,
even when I did wake up, like I didn't, I didn't want to, like do
what I normally did. Like, I didn't want to, like, just hang
out or do nothing in my house. Like I actually wanted to be
productive with my day. So that's what I was doing. I was being
productive. And
like, I was enjoying it like it was
it I've never
like,
like not to come off.
Doing work like that hasn't been too enjoyable like that. But like
this was the first time like I actually really enjoyed working
which was
the same for me. Because like with the whole prayer thing, I was like
I'm without admit this, I was not really the most practicing Muslim
until like recently, December, right? I figured it out. Like when
I started praying my five prayers, when I started being more
consistent with Islam and I started improving myself. A lie
like I love working though, you know, it's very easy for me, I'm
gonna just like just to be productive. And now I just for
some reason, hate this. I have this hatred, of just wasting time.
I have this hatred of just sitting there doing nothing, right? Yeah,
it's just so boring. Like, I can't stand it like you know, always got
to improve always gotta gain knowledge. Always got to do
something, you know? And it's,
yeah.
Like, today, my friends asked if they can hang out with me. So I
was like, Sure. So I invited them to my house. And we're hanging out
for like, a good two hours. And I was like, I literally just looked
at all my friends. I was like, dude, like, we're not doing
anything. Y'all can just like go right now. I'm not gonna lie, cuz
like, I started getting a headache. Because they're just, I
mean, they're having a good time. And I was sitting there like,
Dude, we're doing nothing. Like I don't want to do nothing. Like
y'all can just go right now. So
this event is
over, okay, would you like to say anything else? Are You Ready?
Ready? You're ready. I don't know what I'm ready for. But
so let me explain to you what the shahada is. So the shahada is
basically a declaration of faith. You're telling all these people
now that I'm a Muslim? And once you say these words like that
Allah Muhammad knows what it's like.
Greatest, I'll slowly fade away. It's the greatest. It's the
greatest one of the greatest statements of all time. Because,
you know, like, like, the word lying on the wall, there's no God
where they wish to accept the love that is so powerful. You know,
like that could honestly like save you from like, *. Yeah, like,
legit. There'll be a man on Yom Okayama on the Day of Judgment,
right? They'll have all these sins, and he'll be like, Man, he's
thinking to himself, I'm gonna go to *. Right? And then there'll
be one card that says, like, you know, have a walk, and there'll be
put on his good deeds, right? You know, what happened? All his bad
deeds, his mountains of bad deeds dropped immediately because of
that one statement alone. And because of that, he got agenda to
heaven. Like, yeah, that's how powerful that statement is. And
it's so powerful in the fact that after once you say it, you're
like, a new Muslim. You're like, brand new. You're like a newborn
baby. Every single thing that you did, I don't care how bad it was.
No sense any syndrome. It's forgiven immediately. Yeah. So
prepare yourself.
simple statement. No pressure, you know? Yeah, okay.
I shall do
repeat after me a shadow. I said that La ilaha illa. No, no, no. in
Allah, Allah wa shadow. Why Shalu Inna? No, Mohammed Mohammed Abdo
up up the hill up to World War One rasuluh Rosaleen, you got my bad,
so let's get another sponsor. Okay. I'm gonna say in English.
Now you're gonna repeat after I bear witness. I bear witness that
there is no dadey that there is no God, that
that, no way would you set the duty? There is no there is no
deity
worthy of worship, worthy of worship, except the law, except
Allah. And I bear witness and I bear witness that Muhammad that
Mohammed is the servant is the servant, a messenger of Allah and
most miserable last year and with some Allahu Akbar.
Allahu Akbar, you know, now you're a Muslim, every single thing you
just did is forgiven, you know?
That's wild.
That's
shallow and so inshallah I'll teach you how to teach the fatter
the first chapter on on and then I'll teach you how to pray
and got your money or has like the box, right? Yeah. Someone who has
like the Muslim box and it will teach you it will help you out. We
have Muslim programs out there. So don't worry, man. Don't feel
overwhelmed. Just take it one step at a time. All right. All right.
Oh, no, no, it's fine. It's fine. It's in that suddenly it's in your
office. It's yeah. Okay.
So when he's bringing
you want to tell us how you feel like
dude.
Like
that conversation last night was actually so mind blowing. Like
not and especially coming here like I felt so welcomed into this.
Like
I appreciate the dinner. No problem.
Anytime.
Yeah, go ahead.
On the you know, I know you don't have two kids. So like when new
Muslims converted some some of them they choose a Muslim name,
but you don't have to choose names.
Okay, yeah, it's fine. You can keep rolling if you like, but you
know.
Alright. So
shall
We'll start you off. This is your prayer memoir. Shala. You know, so
let me pray five times a day. We face Mecca. Right? You know, black
you cop, right? Yeah, we face that direction. And then we pray. Right
and show love. Oh, we got you a bunch of books right by Hamza
unification. Sir. Right. So like, it's my Hamza Yusuf. He's a famous
Muslim preacher. You know, everyone knows him. He sometimes
comes here, right? So then I'll leave that book right here.
You know, when we have this book, the book of assistance for new
Muslims is going to help you out a lot. Until you're right now for a
long time you're gonna be you might feel lonely, but just trust
me these books are going to be like your best friends rope.
Alright, the next book is this being a Muslim, a practical guide.
It's going to help you out trust me like, okay, like, all right,
and this is the greatest book of all time. Got out
I'm Yes sir. Yes, this is the Quran and it's all Masha Allah is
even with the last sermon. So like it's the English translation. You
can take that Be careful with it. It's the word of Allah directly,
right? Yeah. It's like the one of the, it's the greatest book of all
time, there's gonna be nothing like this book until the Day of
Judgment, there'll be nothing. So just take care of it, you know,
read it, and trust me any, any questions you have any stressful
situation that you're gonna have, you're gonna find it in this book,
eventually, you just got to read it, you know, you got to think
over. So this is this is your new Muslim guy in Hamden, but I
appreciate it and I got your anytime.
So again, don't feel overwhelmed. We're going to take this baby
steps, you know, yeah, so