Hosai Mojaddidi – Honoring Our Grandparents
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
bIllahi min ash shaytani R rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim
Assalamualaikum and welcome to Grandparents Day at MCC. I'm
Khadija Sade. And I'm grateful to MCC for giving me this opportunity
to hold this wonderful session to bring together our grandparents
and their lovely, lovely kids.
So, we will begin with a short introduction and discussion about
the topic, and then inshallah we'll have a guest speaker, we
were hoping to have her say, Join us for a few minutes. And then
inshallah we'll move to the craft area, we'll do some craft together
some coloring, make some lovely take home crafts,
which will be followed by snacks. And inshallah we're hoping to have
a photo session where we can get a photo of you with your grandkid,
and we'll email it to yourself.
So let's start this session, like getting to know you all a little
better. Okay, so last year, we went to the write up there. So
raise your hand if that's applicable to you. And the
grandkids a little young to understand what that means. Feel
free to, you know, step. So, how many of you live with your
grandparents?
Like, oh, you live with you, you live with your grandparents,
whatever, in the same house? Oh, well, wonderful. Mashallah. And
how many of you have your grandparents living nearby? Maybe
they just live across the street or somewhere in the Greater Bay
area? So you will, at least
you do. Okay, and how many? Are there any grandparents here who
are visiting probably from other parts of the country or other
parts of the world? Yeah, I'll handle what are you visiting us
from? India. That's a long way.
Perfect.
So now for the grandkids here, imagine yourself, you're all
alone, and there's nobody to care for you, nobody to help you.
Mommy and Daddy are not around with scary.
Like, there's absolutely nobody to help you around to take care of
you. Would you be scared? Would you be learned? You can answer
back.
Now that you wouldn't be scared,
that you weren't brave
enough to you be really scared. So now think about how blessed you
are to have your parents and even more blessed to have their parents
close to you. Do you know what a great blessing it is from Allah to
have your parents with you?
Who gave you your parents and grandparents? Allah? Did
you want to answer that? Who gave you your parents and grandparents?
Sorry, can you be a little more?
Alexa subhanaw taala. Perfect. Yes. Allah gave us our parents.
And he gave us their parents who happened to be our lovely lovely
grandparents. Okay, so Allah is a Holic. That's one of the Beautiful
Names of Allah. And what is a Holic mean? Well, it means that
Allah is the Creator. He created things from nothing, right? From
absolutely nothing. And that is something that we have to be
always grateful for our parents. And then of course, when I when I
put parents in automatically refers to their parents work,
which happened to be your grandparents. Okay. So something
we always have remember in life is how much grateful we are to our
parents and our grandparents. So
and one of the easiest ways to do this. Do you know what, there's
one word? That means to thank Allah for the bottom of your
heart? It's a simple word. It's called a humbler. Let me just say
that with me, please. Alhamdulillah Yeah, that means
you're thankful to Allah, you're grateful to Allah. So always be
thankful you you will never know the value of a parent's renting
unless you don't happen. Okay, so you're all some of the most
blessed people in the world to have what your parents and
grandparents right beside you.
So, do you want a family means
a family is most likely you?
Your siblings siblings means your brothers and sisters. Then your
parents?
Dear parents, so your mom has her parents and your data separate
back to those all become your grandparents, your lovely, lovely
grandparents.
So who takes care of you at home most? Mostly, like who have who
cooks for you?
Who? You know how to go to school and everything?
Can anybody answer that to me?
Yeah.
Yeah, mom. Yeah. Perfect. And who do you think did that to your mom
when she was a kid?
Yep, better for kids at some time, right? So somebody would have
helped do the same thing to them, that your mom and dad do for you?
And who are they?
You are here with them today, whoever.
Your grandparents, yeah. So you have to be doubly thankful to your
grandparents first, because they took care of your parents. And now
they can just still here with you and they taking care of you. The
fact that they all came today with you itself is a blessing because
they want to be with your right. And they want to be with you. They
want to play with you. So,
so always be grateful and thankful to Allah first and then your
parents and their parents.
Yeah, Allah. Allah is a college. Of all I see. Allah meet my world,
and Allah with me.
Okay, so there's a family tree right there. So who's at the
bottom of the family tree?
Everyone?
Yeah, so we begin right here. So that's you, right? And then your
mommy, and then your daddy.
I mean, depends on how many siblings you have. That your
siblings, and then your mommy's mother and father and your mother
and father. So those of you members. That's what a family
looks like.
Okay, so can you imagine yourself in a really hot desert? And how
much it would be to get some shade under that lovely tree?
How do you think it would be? How would that make you feel? Would
that make you feel happy?
Would that make you feel like relieved that you finally got some
shade in the burning hot desert. That's exactly how your
grandparents are. They are a lovely welcoming tree in the
middle of the desert, they're always ready to have you. They're
always ready to welcome you to play with you. Right there, that
really cool shape that brings relief in your life.
They have all the love and warmth in the world for you. For
grandparents, grandkids mean their entire world,
that they're like these precious pearls to them. So they're always
willing and ready to shower their love and warmth.
Right. So if you know how deep the roots of that tree would go to
hold it in all that wind of the desert.
They're always there for you the roots of your family.
Right? So you may not always live together, but never doubt the love
that your grandparents have for you.
So,
parents,
the most important people in our lives are our grandparents. So
that Allah has a special gift to us. Okay, so value them, treasure
them, and do the work with them. Do you know how much do I want to
for you?
Right? Grandparents, I'm sure after every salah they work with
your grandkids, and huge to the same to do after them at this age.
They probably need the work for good health. Okay, so always,
always do the work for them. And what else can you do to make them
happy? Right.
Spend time with them. So that is something I'm sure most
grandparents look forward to. They either live with you or deliver
with wherever. But I'm sure they would love to spend time with you.
How many of you actually spend time with your grandparents? Raise
your hands.
You do? Do you love spending time with your grandparents? Yeah. Oh
perfect.
So what do you what do you do to spend time with them?
You can raise your hand and answer feel free to
Sure go ahead.
Please line with your mom. Hey, that's nice. Yeah.
hang out and talk. Oh Your grandpa
It's a really cool hangout to talk to
anyone else.
You read books for them. That's fantastic. That's probably the
best thing to do. They make the best playmates, right? Okay. So
make sure whatever time you get off your school, whatever they do,
you spend time with graphics, they love spending time with you, okay,
and do something you enjoy doing with them, and do something they
enjoy doing with you as well. So it could be something like, like I
said, about reading a book, if your grandparent like read the
book, read the bill, learn language from them, they probably
know more languages, they know better languages, they'll know
your your, but I'd say your native language maybe, and let's talk to
them, talk to them about anything in the world. And I'm sure that
fans will listen. Okay, so if it's something that's bothering you, if
it's something that you want to share with them, feel free to talk
to them.
When you're a little older, maybe you can discuss your issues with
them, they will listen without being judgmental, right, and help
them take care of them. Maybe offer them a glass of water when
they need it, you know,
come over. And if you're old enough to give them your medicines
on time, feel free to do that.
share a common hobby, maybe your grandmother loves cooking. So go
ahead and learn something from them. Help them to bake maybe, or
something you can do, learn a skill from them, cook a favorite
meal, make a quote, draw your family tree, collect old
photographs, nobody in the family would have better photographs than
your grandparents. So take them out, tell them to show it to you.
That way, you'll know your extended family, you might you
know people who live far away, maybe you haven't even seen
sometimes you'll get to know them all those photographs are
wonderful photographs, by all means there will be like black and
white disappear. You wouldn't even have seen those kinds of
photographs. But you'll get another meta.
Learn about the time they were kids. It was a whole different
world. And even when your parents were kids, right? That's the you
can always learn from your grandparents. Nobody else is going
to tell you that and your parents and and we won't tell you all the
secrets of your childhood that their parents would know.
Okay, do you know that there's some serious benefits to spending
time with grandparents? What can they be? So the the first point
here is that they're both mentally and emotionally enriching
football. Do you know what that mean?
Like escape, you can share with your grandparents you can confide
with them, you can tell them anything you want.
Black pants on seeing your kids keep energized. And they might
even forget all the problems they have associated with old age maybe
then forget the aches and pains. Because the what they want to do
is play with your grandkids, spend time with them. Right.
The second point is that grandparents can be both mentors,
and Plymouth. So some of you said that your grandparents played with
you, right? Who said that?
Who says
somebody suddenly fun with them than you? Yeah, grandparents play
with your mom, dad, by all means to be busy, they have jobs to do,
they're running around doing errands, they may be having to
take care of the younger kids, younger siblings. But rabbits have
all the time in the world for you, especially for you. So make sure
you make most of that time. Go play with them.
Maybe you can teach them about him, learn something else from
them. So make sure you do that.
And the point is that the teachers need to teach values. So I
remember as kids, like my grandparents would love us and
they would spend time with us but if we did something wrong, they
would make sure to correct us exactly like how your grandparents
probably do.
Um, they will teach you about your heritage, though they'll pass on
family traditions like you might have a special special dish that
they make on eBay that you went then parents would know and they
will teach you about that.
You can also find out about your parents, about their relatives
about your brothers and sisters and we're going to do that at the
end of the session where we're going to make groups inshallah and
going
Let's get to learn on weapons a little better.
So grab a goldmine acknowledge, some of them might not have even
been to school, but they would know more than a lot of your
teachers would know. Because they have something called real life
experiences. They seem like they've been through so much. So
don't ever tell them that you don't know. Okay? Because they for
sure, no way more than you at this age at least. Okay?
And how many of you find your grandparents really funny? Do they
make you laugh?
By saying something you do? Because you
get in the habit they make you laugh, like, do they do something
funny? Do they say something funny? Say something funny about
you?
Okay, that's fine. Yeah.
That they have to be with you.
Okay.
This is not something that I tell you to be. It's something that
Allah has told us in the Quran that we have to be good to
Americans. And when I asked the parents here, by all means, use it
for your grandparents, right? So in Surah, Israel chapter 17 of the
grant was 23. It says, Well, Bill, well, they need you know what that
means? That is being good to your parents. If it says Be good to
your parents, that certainly says Be good to your parents, parents,
right?
Right. Don't even say up to them. Like when when they sometimes tell
you something you don't want.
Don't say that? No, that's wrong. Don't say that. Don't say that
your parents do.
But on the other hand, right, the Westfalen that says, My Lord,
they're still on them. They mercy even as they cherish me in
childhood, would you for even one moment thing is they will, they
will not take care of you, you care to your weapons, that who
take care of you.
So always remember that when you say something to them, like don't
say anything to them, be nice to them. That's what it says Be good
to your parents.
Don't respect disrespect. Listen to them, obey them.
And of course do the work for them like the third one says.
So this was said that after Allah, the people we need to respect the
most loved the most innovative most would be your parents, and
your grandparents don't upset them.
You want to make Allah happy. Make your parents happy?
Can you tell me ways of how you can be good to your webcams?
You can look that up and say that you can tell any other point that
you feel by yourself.
Do you want to share something with us?
know okay.
How can you be good to your grandparents? Talk like Don't be
rude, okay? So be nice to them, talk to them.
Hug them, kiss them. And I'm sure they do that to you right to show
your love to them. So your affection to them, show them how
much they mean to you.
Okay, obey and listen to them. Don't say no. Don't just say no
and walk
and walk up and ask permission. Say thank you. Please, in sorry.
Those are really simple things, but they would make their day help
whenever you can. Okay, like what are the medicines carrying your
bags, but anything you can do to make life easier for them? Take
care of them when they're old. Sick.
Then pray for them enough to forgive them to calm them down
myself.
Do you know who the best grandfather ever was?
Can somebody think of who would have been the best father the best
husband the best grandfather ever.
He was our beloved prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam.
Right?
So he loves his kids a lot. He's to help them help them. Please
pray with him. He
Just carry them on your shoulders. How many of you have been carried
on the shoulders by your grandparents? Does anybody
remember being carried on your shoulder on their shoulders?
No, it's too heavy. Now. This is probably when you're younger,
right? He will teach them to pray. He will teach them to Priscilla
and teach the midwives was, He will teach them the religious
duties, he would never let them movie.
And he would never differentiate between a grandson and
granddaughter.
Okay, so
I have a few questions that I would need you to form groups like
maybe like three grandkids and their their parents, and then ask
them these questions. It's your way of getting to know your
grandparents better. That way you will take something back from the
session, and you would have probably learned a little more
about your Okay, so you want to form like oops.
I said I want to
Masha Allah, how is everyone? This is such a nice event, my disciple.
Thank you, Jenny, for organizing this. And for all of you for
coming out. It's really beautiful. I am so honored to be here. First
of all, thank you for inviting me to speak. I just wanted to share a
few stories and a few Hadith. Just to kind of reinforce the beauty
of, you know, the objective we all have here, which is to honor each
other right? As little ones, but also as our beloved and esteemed
grandparents here. So I wanted to just read a couple of headings.
The problems I sent him said, he is not one of us, who does not
show mercy to our young ones, and esteem to our elderly. Okay,
really important. So what does that mean little ones? What do you
think that means? Anybody want to take a guess?
The process of him is saying, in order to be included in his Alma,
you have to do what he said you have to first he's talking to the
older people. So to all the grandparents, he says, You have to
be merciful, which means show a lot of love to little kids. Okay,
so the processor is making two statements, that he looks to the
little kids all of you. And he says what you have to respect your
elders, the elderly. So both the process of addressing both of you,
he's saying to the, to the elderly, and to the grandparents,
show mercy, be kind to the little ones. And he's talking to the
little ones and say, be respectful to your grandparents, right. And
then he goes on and he says, If a young man honors an elderly on
account of his age, Allah subhanaw taala will appoint someone to
honor him. So every time you're respectful to your grandparents,
this is inshallah I promise that you will also have when it's your
time and you become older, you will have people around you who
also show your respect. So there's this beautiful, you know, give and
take that's happening, right? That Allah is part of that is
constantly reminding us we were all should be working together
because it's mutually beneficial. Right? And then another important
thing, and this is really important. I actually wrote a
book. I don't know if it's up here, but I'm gonna take it out
because I do actually have a copy. I wrote a book on other who can
tell me what other is? What's other BS?
respects? Very good manners. Okay. Have you seen this book ever?
Anybody seen this book? You have it? Oh, how sweet. That's so nice.
Thank you. I wrote this book. Okay. Why did I write this book?
One of the reasons I wrote this book was because I first of all
have children of my own. But I'm also a teacher. And I realized
that one of the things that we need to as parents and as adults
and even
to teach our kids but also to remind ourselves is the importance
of respect. So in one of the chapters here, I'm just going to
quickly read it for you. Okay, I know if you want to actually come
up, you want to come up on ones come up right here on a post,
because I want to read this section.
Okay, you can, if you can see it, that's great. Just sit right here
and I'll try to come around. Okay. So in this chapter, thank you.
It's called, Oh, perfect. It's called sharing and caring. Okay.
And the whole book is about adult and it's about being a Muslim and
what that means, so it's actually a songbook. Okay, so I'm gonna Is
it okay, should I sing it for you? Is that okay? Did you like that?
Okay. I'll do a little song for you. Okay. Just on this page. It
says, I am a Muslim. I say the truth. I mind my manners. Yes, I
do. I saved my money to help
help people in need. I give my time to increase my good deeds. I
share my food and offer the best thing first, I drink three small
sips to quench my thirst. I visit the sick to help ease their pain.
I pray their strength and health will remain. I sit with my elders
and ask them how they are. I help them walk to and from the car.
Okay, so just on this page alone, what did we learn? What did we
learn when your grandparents come over? Should you be sitting in
your toy room and playing with your toys? Know when your
grandparents come over? Should you be watching TV and you know your
cartoons? Your favorite cartoons? Know when you guys come over?
Should you be outside? Getting all muddy and dirty and ignoring them?
Oh, so when they come over what should we do? Yes. MashAllah
Excellent? Say hi. Or what else? Give me something better than Hi.
What else do we say? You can hug them very good. What do we say?
Good Mashallah. We see Santa. Very good. You hug them. I love that.
Who else? What else should you do? His?
Beautiful you answer them. I love them. And Allah bless you. Yes.
What else should you do? You can play with
a loved one your grandkids play with you? Right Hamdulillah. So
this is showing the right to your elders is by realizing when they
come over, that their time is really valuable. And your games
and your cartoons, you can watch them anytime. But if you go to
your grandparents home or they come to your house, a great way to
honor them is to spend time with them and ask them questions and
hear their stories. And a lot of times, they have a lot of funny
stories. Now what about if you walked into a room and your
grandparents were sitting?
Is there a specific rule about what you should do?
What should you do?
Well, should they say hi to you first or should you say hi to them
so that I should say excuse me?
Good you say salam to them first. This is actually from the Hadith,
okay, the process and said that the young, the younger people
should initiate the salah to anybody who's older. Okay. And
then the one who passes by a group should initiate that to a group
that sitting down and the small group of people should initiate
the cilantro large group good. So hamdulillah What about speaking
first? If you and your grandparents are talking about
something who should talk first?
Very good, you guys. It's actually a hadith the boss I said and said
to us, let the eldest among you speak first. So this is something
we should all know. So let them answer first. Okay. Anything else
that you that you know about? How you should be with the prompts? I
mean, with your excuse me with your elders? Anybody else want to
share? Yeah, you just want to raise your hand. That's okay. I
just wanted to let just end on one other thing. Now the prompts I
sent him his who knows what his two grandsons names were?
Start, they both start with an H.
Is everybody stay with me, Hassan. And then Jose, Jose, the Aloha
Alaikum. People think they're twins. They weren't twins, they're
brothers. But the bumps I sort of love them so so much. He actually
there's many studies where he talks about how much he loved
them, and one in specific. Now, before I actually get to that, we
have to remember the bra sizes. I was with them from birth. And he
did you know, he, he's he, they grew up with him in his household.
And they, he taught them he was their teacher. But another really
beautiful part of their relationship that he actually
describes right? Is in a hadith he says what these are my two sons
and the sons of my daughter. Oh Allah, I love them. So love them
and love those who love them. So the prompts I sent him didn't talk
refer to them as his grandsons. Do you get that? He called them
directly his sons, which is really beautiful, because you should look
at your grandparents, not just like the parents of your parents,
but actually like your parents. They have the same, they should
have the same, you know, level of respect that you give your parents
like wow, they're like my parents because they love you that much.
And sometimes with all the candy and the ice cream and the cookies
they give you right they show you and they spoil you with gifts they
show you that right
But this is this is what we get from this hadith is the prophesy
southern is telling us that the relationship between grandchild
and grandparent is actually like a parent and a child relationship.
So we should respect our grandparents at the same level.
Okay, um, the law. So are there any other questions? I just
prepared a very short talk but I'm happy to answer any questions for
many of you know, hum did Allah Well, I thank you for your time. I
know mashallah, you have a beautiful program ahead. Just like
go ahead and may Allah bless all of you and strengthen your
relationships and thank you guys for being such a wonderful
audience. I appreciate it. Okay. Have a wonderful day. Okay, so
that was a call. Take care.