Hamzah Wald Maqbul – Sincerity in Giving Advice and Taking Advice
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From the Ayat
of Al Quran Al Hakim, the Quran full
of wisdom,
is
the commandment,
the double emphatic commandment of Allah
Surah Alai Imran.
Let there be from amongst you a group
of people such an Ummah, such a nation.
That calls people toward goodness.
That calls people toward good things.
Let them be amongst you a group of
people who rises to invite people to that
which is good,
to command that which is right, and to
forbid that which is evil.
And those are the people who attained success.
The commandment of that which is right and
the forbidding of that which is evil
is not merely the preserve
of those who are
religious minded.
It's not merely the preserve of those who
are
praying 5 times a day in the masjid.
It's not even really the preserve of the
righteous and the pious.
We have a whole complex
in America.
It's part of the cultural history of America,
the holier than thou complex,
where people judge one another.
When one person tells another person
something good or gives them good advice,
or tells
them not to do something bad,
discourages them from doing something bad, either to
themselves or to others.
There is a
a rider with that, that by me telling
you this,
I'm also establishing that I'm better than you
are. I am more righteous than you are.
I'm more pious than you are.
Traditionally, the Muslims didn't
view this,
well this task and this job of commanding
to that which is right and forbidding that
which is evil, to be that way.
Rather, it was something that was done with
some humility,
with the understanding of this is a job
that I'm tasked to do,
And it's a farida, it's a farad, it's
it's a obligation to command to that which
is right and forbid that which is evil.
It's a command it's a obligation in Islam.
Even if a person themselves is not able
to fulfill what they are commanding or if
a person themselves is not a good person.
This makes sense how? That this is a
job that Allah
tasked us with, to encourage one another to
good, and to discourage one another from evil.
It's a job that we're tasked with, and
like a slave has no choice but to
obey the master. Just like that, we have
no choice but to obey Allah
In fact, we're commanded
not to look down on people when we
enjoy the ride and forbid the evil.
It comes in a hadith of timidity that
nobody will
look down on another. Nobody will look down
on another. Forget about when they're telling them
to stop their sin. Nobody will simply look
down on another person who is committing a
sin or committing a wrong as if I'm
better than you are.
Except for
Allah will cause that person
to be in the tribulation and to be
tried and to be humiliated by that same
sin before they die.
This is something that's very scary.
The
assumption
and the acting
as if a person has greatness.
This is only the right of Allah This
is not the right of any of his
creation.
When we command to that which is right
and forbid that which is evil, we do
it in the spirit of what? In the
spirit of with
sincerity to one another, and in the mode
of sincere advice and of good advice.
This is why traditionally,
from amongst the Muslims, even our great scholars
and our great righteous people,
they would not chastise someone for telling them
to do something.
Oftentimes people would give advice and it would
be even wrong.
And so the proper adab is what? To
thank a person for giving them good advice
even if it's wrong, even if you disagree
with the advice somebody is giving you. So
imagine if someone gives you correct advice,
what should the adab be? If you're supposed
to thank someone for giving you advice, even
if you disagree with it, even if you
think it's wrong, even if you're not going
to enact it, Then what should be if
someone tells you to do something and they're
right?
You see, you look at the advice, you
don't look at the person who's delivering it.
You look at the advice, you don't look
at the person who's delivering it. Oftentimes, good
advice is delivered with very bad adam, with
very bad manners.
Something that could have been taken care of
or broached or, addressed in private
is broached in public.
Something that could have been addressed or brushed
with kindness
is brushed with harshness or with indifference.
Even then, it's the add up to take
advice and not to take it personally
and not to take it personally.
Why do people take advice when someone gives
them advice in public? Why do people take
it badly?
People take it badly when this is embarrassing.
You see in front of everybody else, your
shortcomings are being pointed out.
For other people, you should be very concerned
about that. You shouldn't give other people
advice in public if you can get the
job done by giving them advice in prayer.
But it's a double standard. There should be
a double standard. You should have one standard
for other people. That standard must be much
higher than the standard you have for yourself.
As for yourself and for myself,
if somebody gives me advice in public when
they could've given it in private, it should
make no difference to me. Why?
Because Allah sees you in public, and Allah
sees you in private. He sees you when
you're alone at your worst, when you're alone
at your best, when you're in public at
your worst, when you're in public at your
best. He sees you. There's no fooling you.
So what's the point of being embarrassed in
front of the creation?
When a person is not embarrassed in front
of the creator.
And if a person has shyness and in
front of the creator, then the creation their
eyes are not something that should increase or
decrease in that shyness or one bit.
This is very difficult advice to enact. But
this is the adab of Islam. This is
what Islam teaches us.
Obviously, different people do things for their own
motives. Sometimes someone will chastise you in public,
and their motive is not your Islam. Their
motive is not your rectification, rather they have
some sort of ulterior motive.
Islam teaches us not to worry about or
judge other people's motives, because the Islam and
the rectification of other people is a second
priority after
the Islam and rectification of yourself, of myself,
for each and every one of us.
The commandment of, of of of enjoining that
which is right and forbidding that which is
evil is described in the beautiful hadith of
He
says, the
prophet
says
that the likeness
the likeness
of those
who cross the limits of Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala. Meaning, those who are doing haram.
Those who stop at the limits of Allah
don't cross them, I should say, and the
likeness of those who don't stop and who
cross them. So you have 2 groups. 1,
people who are observing the Khudood of Allah,
the limits of Allah,
and the other group that are
observing or not observing them and are crossing
them. Now it's important to stop for a
second
and appreciate what words are used over here.
Because this is one of the reasons we
quote the a hadith and we quote the
Quran
in Arabic, not in translation.
Because a, they're untranslatable,
b, in translation,
you lose precision in meaning.
1 of the 1 of the, definitions of
this word, qudu. Right? We say the limits
of Allah ta'ala. Some people cross them. Those
are the ones who commit those the the
acts that are unlawful.
And one set of people who when they
see that limit, they stop before crossing.
One of the meanings of the word hudud
in Arabic language
is a definition.
You know, when you define something, you look
it up in the dictionary, what's the definition
of it? You have an engineer
defining a a a, a plot of land,
a survey. Where does the land the lines
of the land end? Where do they begin?
Where do they cross over with one another?
And part of the,
understanding of,
of hadd is what, of hadd is what,
is that it requires education. It requires knowing
where those lines are with precision
with precision.
If I were to ask everybody in this
masjid, how do you know how to make
muvu? Do you know how to make the
the the, the
ablution, the washing before prayer?
Undoubtedly, almost everybody is going to race with
one another to raise their hand and say,
of course, I do. In fact, many people
will feel insulted. In fact, some people may
feel insulted that I even asked question right
now. But the fact of the matter is,
and this is not anecdotal. This is based
on empirical evidence.
Group after group of Muslims,
once you start talking about the actual issues
of ritual purification
in detail,
what will end up happening, there'll be a
cascade of questions,
very practical daily questions that are things that
happen in people's lives. There will be a
practical cascade of questions both from the brothers
and from the sisters,
such that it will overwhelm any speaker who
is teaching a class.
It will be something that will have to
be divided up over several sessions.
That's how much room there is to learn.
How what are we talking about here? Hadood.
Right? We're talking about limits. We're talking about
knowledge.
What is righteousness? What is not righteousness? What
is piety? What is not piety? What's your
right against people? What's their right against you?
What is Allah's right from you? What should
you expect from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala?
All of those things. How what form do
they take in this world? What form do
they take in the hereafter?
It's a big deal. That's why the Nabi
has so many
has so many, a hadith and so many
statements about the importance of learning knowledge.
Why? Because what we're gonna talk about right
now, commanding to that which is right and
forbidding that which is evil. If a person
doesn't have knowledge, if a person is Jahil,
if they're ignorant,
they're going to take this Khutba,
and it's going to fly like a kite
in the left field of their imagination.
And they're going to go crazy on people,
and think that they're doing something good when
in fact all they're doing is evil. All
they're doing is hard.
Right? We you remember we talked about this
whole more righteous than thou, holier than thou
complex.
That that the people, in this country, in
in this culture detest and hate so much.
Why is it? It's all based on people
doing
enjoying that which is right and forbidding that
which is evil While not knowing what is
right, and not knowing what is evil, and
not knowing what the proper etiquette is, enjoying
what is right and forbidding what is evil
is.
And it's something that I hope is not
falling on deaf ears.
But we have to learn it. We can't
just say we're gonna put this to the
side. Your religion is your personal matter. My
religion is my personal matter. I don't interfere
with you. You don't interfere with me. And,
we just do our own thing.
Because only people who do that are people
who don't love one another.
The only people who do that are people
who don't love one another. Right?
Right? To you, it's your religion. To me,
it's mine. It's I of the Quran. Which
Surah is it from?
It's from Surah Al Khafirun.
It's addressed to those people who, are dejected
from faith, who reject faith, who have nothing
to do with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. It's
not a way to treat one another as
brothers and sisters. Allah is not a way
to treat one another as brothers and sisters.
If you cared for another person, you wouldn't
leave them alone like that. You would always
tell them what's best, and you would always,
protect them from what's worst. And you would
always love for them to tell you what's
best, and you would always love for them
to protect you what's worst. So the rabbi
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam talks about a methal,
about a a parable or a likeness.
The likeness of those who stop at the
limits that Allah ta'ala has laid down for
them in the sacred law. And those people
who cross the limits, who don't care about
the limits, who cross the limits that are
laid down for them in the sacred law.
Like a group of people
who are gonna take a journey on a
ship.
Right? This is this is a metaphor. What
is the ship? The metaphor of the ship.
The ship is
earth. It's like a group of people
who have to travel on on a ship,
and so they draw lots.
You know? Drawing lots, it's complete it's a
random way of doing it. Who gets to
be on the deck? Who gets to be,
down in the the the hull of the
ship? Right? All of the the the different
places in the ship are different. Some are
more pleasant than others. Some have a better
view than others. Some are closer to the
bathroom. Some are further from the bathroom. Some
of them are noisier. Some of them different
how what's the most what's the most fair
way of
dividing them?
Right? You draw lots.
Right? You draw lots, and randomly whatever, whoever
gets whatever, that way we cannot accuse anyone
of being unfair.
This is a of the positions that we
have in life. Although the positions that we
have in life, the places that we have
in life are random,
Everything Allah does in his wisdom,
in his knowledge that preceded
the creation of creation.
Everything that we have is part of that
wisdom, and it's through his will. And everybody
is where they are supposed to be, and
there is nowhere better for each and every
one of us to end up. This is
our belief.
There's nowhere better that you could've gone, nowhere
better I could've gone. So you're saying, you
know, someone sitting next to me is making
$500,000 a year, and I'm late on my
credit card payments. And, you're telling me where,
I'm where I'm supposed to be, and there's
no one who could be better than me?
That's not believable.
Say, look. You'll go to Yom Ale on
the day of judgment
when the righteous
are in Jannah. And when the the arrogant,
and the the the criminal,
and the,
and the person who cared neither for themselves
nor for Allah, nor for their brother or
sister,
whatever faith they may have been of.
That person is in the fire where they
deserve to be. On that day, on that
day when you're enjoying the blessings of Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala, and you're enjoying the mercy
of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, on that day
tell me am I not where I'm supposed
to be? You have to look at things
from what? From a holistic perspective, you cannot
look at things from just a small perspective.
Like an ant that's crawling on the black
part of the carpet, and he thinks the
entire carpet is black.
He doesn't appreciate the design of the entire
carpet, because it's so small. You can't see
right now. A day will come when you'll
see the Hikmahullah
and everything.
A day will come when even pharaoh will
be a person who knows as much about
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
as as as as the the right as
the people in this world do.
What even the worst of people will be
people of, divine noses. On that day, it
won't be a benefit to them, but they'll
know on that day. Just like all of
us will know.
So the metaphor of
of of of this,
istiham,
of dry lots for which place you end
up in the ship,
is that to you because you can't appreciate
it, to me because I can't appreciate it.
Because we're small beings
in this in this planet compared to our
Lord who's mighty and majestic and completed his
knowledge and completed his wisdom.
To us, it may seem very random. Where
did we end up? Who's a man? Who's
a woman?
Who is from who is an Arab? Who
is not an Arab? Who is American? Who
is not American? Who is intelligent? Who is
not the brightest, you know, bulb in the
in the set?
Who is
wealthy, who's not wealthy,
who is physically strong, who is always ill.
Allah subhanahu wa knows best to us. It
seems as if it's random.
But whatever, we accept whatever lot we have
in life, and we go to our different
places in the ship.
So what he says what what does the
Nabi sallallahu alaihi wa sallam say about this
parable? He continues.
He says that there's a problem that everybody
in the ship needs water.
So some people are closer to the water
and
from from the deck of the ship, and
some people are further from water. They're in
the hull of the ship. So every time
the people in the hull of the ship
have to cross the people on the deck,
the people on the deck, they ask act
like they're bothered. They're annoyed.
Why are you wasting our time? Why are
you,
giving us this difficulty?
Why are you,
annoying us so much? You need water again?
You need water again?
And so what happens to people in the
bottom? They have an idea.
They have an idea. It's not a very
smart idea.
What is their idea? That if we drill
a hole in the side of the ship,
we can get as much water as we
want to. It's our own access of water.
It's our own almost, inexhaustible
tap of water,
and we won't bother the people who are
up top.
This is a very beautiful example. Why?
Because it gives a an excuse also for
the people of sin.
It gives an part of the deed is
to have a good opinion of others.
Even if people are sinners, to have a
good opinion of them. To know that they're
in a circumstance, if I was in that
circumstance, maybe I would have even done worse
than what they
did. What is it? That everybody has different
needs and different wants in life. Everybody has
different circumstances.
Some people's circumstance compels them to do certain
things. And all the all the people on
the top of the ship, you know, you're
have both your parents,
You, were given an education.
You were taught good manners. You always you
know, you never starved. You never
were wrongly incarcerated for a crime you didn't
commit. When people meet you, they meet you
with honor and respect. They don't meet you,
you know, in a in a in a
way that's detestable
or in a way that assumes that you're
a criminal or that you're a person of
second rate in terms of value or worth
as a human being.
From that pers perspective, it's very difficult to
appreciate why somebody would commit a crime.
Because in from that perspective,
you and I have never had to commit
a crime.
To do what's right has been easier for
us than it has been for other people.
There's a number of circumstances
that some of which we know, some of
which are measurable.
Poverty and
education, etcetera. They're measurable that that show that
there's an empirical connection between
these indicators
and how likely a person is to commit
a crime or to commit a sin, to
break the law.
And there are certain things that we cannot
empirically measure, but they're real. They're real. Mental,
spiritual, psychological
stresses that people face. They're very
real. So it's very beautiful that what is
it? That their sin starts out of some
innocence.
It starts out of a combination of innocence
and ignorance.
And this is another plug for why knowledge
is so necessary.
Common sense would have told those people, this
is not a good idea, but it's not
so common after all. That's why a community
which is educated
is a community which is righteous.
Even if the people don't have the disposition
of righteousness inside of them.
Whereas a community which is uneducated
is going to be a community of harm
even if people have the disposition of piety
inside of them. Why? Because they will use
religious fervor and zeal to do something
which is not beneficial,
and they'll think it's beneficial.
Whereas the other set of people will withhold
themselves from doing something wrong because they can
truly appreciate why that wrong thing is harmful.
And they don't need to rely upon who's
born with a who's born with a quieter
and a less angry disposition than the other
or something like that, which is much more
random, something much more out of your control.
So what happens? They have this idea that
if we just drill a hole,
in the side of the ship, we can
get our water whenever we want to. We
can take it whenever we want to, and
we don't have to bother whoever is above
us in the ship.
The prophet
comments then. He says,
when
That those people on the top deck, when
they find out about this brilliant plan,
if they go down to the bottom deck
and they grab their brother by the hand
and say, brother, this is not a good
idea.
This is, sister, this is not a good
idea.
You're going to sink the entire ship. You're
going to cause problems.
This is not a good idea. We're sorry
that we were so we've made faces every
time you came by and we made those
comments every time you came by for water.
In fact, this is our fault.
We will, from now on, make way from
you. We'll work out a system. You can
come at this time every day. We'll make
way for you. We can work it out.
We can make some solution for this. This
is not a solution.
If they do that,
and and and they they help them, then
who's gonna be saved? All of them will
be saved.
The pious and the impious. All of them
will be saved together. The rabbi says, if
they leave them and say, oh, you know
those crazy people, I cannot be bothered with
them. They anoint us on the top of
the deck, and I really don't care what
they're doing out on the bottom deck. I
don't care what those crazy people are doing
in the weird country. I don't care what
the poor people are doing on the other
side of town. I don't care what black
people are doing or what white people are
doing or what immigrants are doing or what
Americans are doing or what, you know, poor
people are doing, or what these people are
doing. I don't care. I live the American
dream. I earned my money. I'm in my
house. I I don't care what's going. People
outside can go to *. That's what the
sad attitude people have. Unfortunately, that's the attitude
a lot of Muslims have. But whatever, let
them go to *. You see this? You
see that I go out and you see
this? Some of the people who pray 5
times a day, it's completely disgusting.
And but when it comes to simple the
simplest of things, they'll take their garbage and
throw it over the walls of their house
into the street. They don't care why everybody
outside can go to *.
Build barbed wire fence, put bars into your
windows, and don't worry about what's going on
outside. Who cares? What did the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam say? He says that if
they if if the people on the top
deck leave the people on the bottom deck
to do what they want to do, and
they let people in the bottom deck die,
then all of them will die together.
And if the people on the top deck
take their brothers by the hand and stop
them from doing what they were gonna do,
And they make some sort of understanding, some
sort of arrangement.
If they can do that, when they're saved,
they're all gonna be saved together. This is
this is a concept. In this in the
the hereafter,
judgment in front of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala,
judgment in front of God is individual. No
man answers for the sins of another person.
No man will receive the reward for the
righteousness of the piety and of the priesthood.
But in this world,
nations are just together. Nations will be successful
together, and they will fail together.
You know, they say failed state. They'll they'll
be successful
together, and they'll be a failed state together.
The pious and the righteous and the criminals
will all fail together, or they'll all be
successful together.
Allah says in his book,
and fear from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala such
a punishment
that doesn't that doesn't,
afflict the people of of of,
of of oppression only. When it hits, it
hits everybody.
When a storm hits, it hits everybody. When
an earthquake hits, it hits everybody. It doesn't
ask who's pious and who's righteous. Maybe miraculously
certain people are saved.
But generally speaking, if a person dies in
it, a a storm or an earthquake, we
don't take it to be that this is
a unrighteous person. It was just their time
to leave this world.
When those punishments strike, they strike everybody together.
This is why we need to command that
which is right and forbid what is evil.
Not because I'm better than you or you're
better than me, but because it's not about
me and you. It's about all of us
together. It's about all of us being saved
together, and it's about all of us being
prevented from being destroyed together. May Allah, subhanahu
wa ta'ala,
give us tafish. May Allah ta'ala, give us
the sincerity. It's not easy. May Allah ta'ala
give us the sincerity we need in order
to view our brothers and their well-being as
our as ourselves and as our own well-being.
And when we give each other
sincere
that it's just that, it's sincere advice. It's
not talking down to somebody or or or
or, you know, seeing ill in somebody. Rather,
it's seeing yourself in another person and it's
having that empathy and that type of sympathy
for another person like you would like other
people to have for yourself. May Allah
to know what is right and what is
wrong in the first place, that we're not
going to go around entirely and beat each
other with a stick. People say, oh, shit.
You have a stick.
I'm afraid you're gonna hit me with it.
There's walahi I see people walking to Masjid
very frequently. They beat each other up. They
don't need a stick. The way they beat
each other up with their words is worse
than what you could have done with a
stick. May Allah protect us from being that
person. May Allah give us forgive us for
having been that person in the past, in
the future that we think twice, and we
only
give advice based on solid and sound knowledge.
And if we don't know something, leave other
people alone and say Allah knows best.
Ask the people of knowledge if you don't
know so that there could be a cure
for the the the the the sickness that
comes with that comes with ignorance. May Allah
enlighten and illuminate our hearts. May
Allah make people as people take each other
by the hand with love and that we
be people who who are who gain salvation
together, not people who are destroyed together.