Hamzah Wald Maqbul – Riyd alSlihn The Prohibition of Leaving Fires Unattended,Pointless Affectation & Performative…
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
So chapter regarding the
prohibition
of leaving fire,
burning in the house when
asleep
or something like that. Meaning, we're not paying
attention, not being there,
not
in the room.
Whether or not it's in a lamp or
it's not in the lamp.
So,
you know, one might think this is from
the chapter regarding common sense. So what's the
point of it in the spiritual path?
There's a number of answers to it. But
to go through very quickly, if you don't
have common sense, you don't have deen.
If you don't have deen, you're not on
a spiritual path. That should be really sufficient
for people
to understand that much, but it gets a
little bit deeper than that. Some of which
we might cover,
while translating the hadith and some of which
we might not. But this may unfold and
open up to you at some point in
your life through experiences.
The fortunate one is the one who learns
a lesson from others the misfortunes of others.
Narrates from the prophet
that he said, do not leave fire in
your houses when you're asleep. And it's a
hadith of both Bukhari and Muslim.
Abu Musa Al Ashaari
said that a house in Medina had burned
down,
upon its
inhabitants.
And when the messenger of Allah
was told about what happened to them,
he said that indeed this fire is an
enemy to you.
So when you sleep, put it out.
Sayedna Jabe narrates
from the prophet
that he said,
cover your
vessels,
the vessels that have food in them. Cover
your vessels and tie up your,
tie up your water skins. The,
is the girba. Right?
The is the
the the drawstring
that you tie the neck of the girdba
out
up with. One of my happy memories of
Mauritania was writing an email to my father
describing that I drink water out of a
dead goat.
And,
he's like, I'm glad you also got to,
like, experience this too. And I'm like, you
drink water out of goat too? He's like,
he has to be like everybody, but you
guys have.
And so, yeah. So the is the drawstring
that you close it with.
For those of you who haven't passed by
the hadith yet in your dura or haven't
gotten to dura yet, this is one of
the interesting worded hadiths, alayni
wika of sahi,
That the two eyes are like the drawstring
of the the sahi is the. It's
the the
the rear, exit
from the human body.
And so the prophet said that, like, the
two eyes are like the drawstring for for
for for the for the backside.
Now what does that mean? The point is
is what? Is that this is an explanation
of why your glue breaks when you sleep.
Is that when your eyes close and you
sleep, then that drawstring is loosened so things
can leave. Hopefully, it's just wind, but
stuff happens.
At any rate, the point is is that
that's the the the remember that because you
might spend, like, an hour trying to look
up what the meaning of that word is,
And so this this will come come in
handy. At any rate, he's saying that,
that,
don't leave your,
sorry, go ahead and close-up your skins, your
water skins,
and, close and, lock your doors. And
put out your,
put out your lamps because shaitan
isn't able to,
open a drawstring,
and he cannot open a door, and he
does not,
he does not over uncover covered
vessels.
This is very
important to understand.
What what did the prophet said?
He said the shaitan doesn't untie or loosen
a drawstring.
Shaitan doesn't
open a door, and sheitan doesn't uncover
a covered vessel.
The sheitan's insinuations
and the sheitan's motivating and the sheitan's
whispering
is
not a physical thing. It's spiritual thing.
And shaitan influences human beings as well as
other living things,
but he's not physically in control of them
until or unless
someone or something allows him to physically control
them. That's a really messed up state to
get to. If you don't ever wanna get
into that state, then don't worship idols,
you know, don't
take drugs and intoxicants. Don't go to, like,
whatever Hindu Jin Baba in order to, like,
you know, get some girl who, you know,
has good reason not to fall in love
with you, to try to force her to
fall in love with you. Don't do any
of that dumb stuff. And for the sake
of the Lord, before you eat something, just
go look up the Hafsa website
and don't eat haram. And you're more or
less good between that, between the 5 daily
prayers,
you're more or less good.
It's something that a person does very deliberately,
and it's just a stupid choice when a
person does it.
But you don't have to be all that
afraid of it. If you don't actually
deliberately
go to that go down that path, it's
not going to it's not gonna harm you.
Like, not that it means anything in
Islam, but they even have this,
they even have this kind of, like, folk
understanding that
the vampire can't enter your house until you
invite him in.
Prophet
says, like, don't let anyone eat your food
except for a takhi, except for the one
fierce god. Don't invite weird people into your
house.
We'll talk a little bit more about that
in one of the subsequent chapters as well.
But the point is is what? These things
only have power over a person. If he
allows them. Normal people wouldn't allow them to,
you know, even a Christian, Mosheic.
But would you like Satan to control your
life?
Pass. Not a good idea.
In fact, many Satan worshipers, all it is
is that they don't actually worship Satan.
They're just, like, upset at somebody or whatever.
But that's their stupidity that they go down
that path.
Anyhow, coming back to this, the understanding is
what? The shaitan doesn't physically mess with stuff.
So go ahead and, like, secure things.
Lock your doors. Whoever does it, male, be
they, or female, husband or wife,
leaving stuff on the burner and then walking
away is not the sunnah. If you have
something to do, get a chair and sit
in the kitchen and do it or whatever,
or go do it and cook stuff later.
This is this is what it's hard to
be it's hard to traverse the spiritual path
properly if you're constantly burning your house down.
I mean, if it happens one time because
cause of a mistake or you didn't know
what you're doing or whatever, that's fine. But
it's it's not
it's it's contraindicated
for having a a life that's successful in
this world and the hereafter to do it
on purpose again and again.
And let me add you. If a person
doesn't find anything to cover,
cover their their pots with or cover their
their vessels that contain food and drink with,
then even,
let them just even put, like, a a
piece of wood over it and
then
take the name of Allah and just do
that.
One of the possible meanings of this the
meaning of ood is like a stick. So
for example,
a person
has
a cup of coffee. There's this mug right
here, has a lid. Right? Imagine there's no
lid. So
one possible interpretation of this is to, like,
just put a say Bismillah and put a
pencil on top of it. You'll see actually
people do this in the
Muslim world. When it's time for salat or
whatever, if something is cooking or something is
there, they'll just put, like, the spatula or
whatever cross crosswise on top of the on
top of the pot,
and, they'll go pray and they'll come back,
or they'll go take care of whatever they
need to do, and they'll come back.
Doing that and saying, Bismillah,
there's some barakah in it. The name of
Allah always has some barakah in it. But
your protection of the pot is a spiritual
protection. It will definitely repel shaitan, but it's
not
gonna
complete the job. What is the actual sunnah?
Cover the thing, shut the door, etcetera.
In a,
in a, manuscript variant of this hadith,
the wording is
There's a o inside there. Like,
to indicate Noah, some type, that whatever you
can cover it with cover it with that,
even if it's, like,
just a stick, a piece of wood.
If you're a
vaheri of the type that's like, oh, look.
This hadi says that you can't urinate in
a pool of standing water, but it's not
approved. You can't defecate in it. Or you
can't say oof to your parents, but it's
not approved that you can't beat them.
This is a type of thinking that's been
largely abandoned by the Ummah and for good
reason, in my opinion.
Sticking to the of the hadith, there's some
barakah always in it.
Why? Because
there is still some benefit in saying Bismillah
and covering it with something.
But the complete benefit is what? Is,
like, actually physically cover it.
Most of us, you know, can afford not
only pots and pans but the lids as
well.
And if you can't, you can at least
afford a plate to put on top of
something, or you can afford
something or another to cover it up with.
The The point is is don't just be
the person who sticks the thing and look,
I'm a good Muslim. I I followed the
sunnah. I followed the hadith. I put a,
you know, a stick on top of it
and I left.
And if you have nothing else other than
that and you follow the sunnah like that,
then that's
very appropriate. If you have something else to
cover it and you're just thinking like, then
this is
the the the correct way of following the
sun. The correct way is covering whatever it
is properly.
The chapter regarding the prohibition,
of Takaluf,
of affectation.
Takaluf being defined here as
an action or speech that has no benefit
and it's very difficult to do.
An action or a speech that has no
benefit, and it's very difficult to do.
Commanded,
to
the say,
say, I
I don't ask you for any any reward
for this tab tabler
for delivering this message.
And I'm not somebody who is a person
of. I'm not just doing something that's pointless
or saying something that's pointless.
So that he's saying that this thing I'm
preaching to you, it's not it's not something
that's pointless. If it was, then it would
have been. Praiseworthy for me not to waste
anyone's time with it, yours or mine, and
it would have been blameworthy for me not
to have said something to you.
But the idea is there's,
which is really bad news for, like, Desi
people
and many other
of the world.
Understand something about
your culture,
about your culture as a Desi or as
a whatever
Persianate,
you know, post imperial,
like orphan,
whether it be on the east side or,
Ottoman on the west side or whatever other
weird
not weird, wonderful and beautiful,
you know, Turkomongal
conquerors in the middle or or somewhere else.
A lot of a lot of what we
consider good manners are imperial court culture,
which makes sense when you're actually the emperor.
Mughal empire was gone a long time ago.
So first, if you really love that culture
and you really want to have those,
then go conquer someplace
and, like, build your, like, whatever, palace out
of pearls or whatever. And then you can,
like, do stuff like, you know, you can
do stuff like that level of that makes
sense. Why? Because you can afford it.
But if you're broke and you're not paying
the rent and you're sitting there chewing on,
on, like, a silver leaf covered,
elaichi and threads of saffron or whatever,
perhaps things are a little bit out of
order. That's at that point, that's not even
good culture. That's just like lack of common
sense.
But if comments, you know, common sense is
not all that common, ironically.
So these are things to remember to keep
in mind. This is one of the things
I was mentioning about about who you should
invite over to your house. It's good to
be
hospitable.
And I think that in America, we're not
hospitable enough.
But there is a level after which it's
not good.
Calling someone into your house, it's not gonna
benefit you. It's not gonna benefit them. It's
a waste of time.
Even some people are so.
They say if I could, you know, take
my and run over it with the car
and, you know, it'll make you happy for
5 minutes, you know, I would do
But there are many people you'll run over
your roof with the car. It will make
them happy for 5 minutes or even 5
seconds or even one second or at all.
That's a complete waste of time. The dean
doesn't call toward what is it? It's what?
Saying something or doing something that has no
benefit.
No,
no benefit,
and and it's really difficult to do.
Fine. There are certain things you can do.
There's may not be all all that much
benefit other than maybe making a person feel
better or honored or whatever, which is
kind of can be can be more important
or less important at times. I think sometimes
we even overvalue that within the cult of
Dawa mentality.
But, Tiga, in general, if you're able to
make a person feel better without causing any
harm, it's a good thing. But there should
also be some sort of limit to,
to how much a person puts into that.
And so, yes, when you have guests over,
what should you do? You should
be good to them, be kind to them,
you know,
put them put their needs in front of
yours. You should feed them,
if you have the food.
But if you don't have the food to
buy things that you don't have or that
you cannot afford,
This is not the sunnah, this is what
the and what ends up happening when you
make the
with a guest like this, you're gonna start
hating having guests over,
and this is a problem.
For this, I say that the hospitality award
goes
to the dark horse candidate, the Mauritanians,
which is what
when you come to Mauritanian's house or at
least the Mauritanian, yeah, I remember. Hajjalad can
tell us if it's still like that or
or not. Maybe some places it's, you know,
the more bling blingy parts of tafarazena
are not not like that no more. I
don't know. But,
I don't know. But the Mauritania I remember,
is,
such that
you
go into someone's house, and they say the
house is your house,
and they really mean it.
But at the same time, because it's so
much, like, no skin off their back, like,
they're not gonna sit there and, like, pour
and, like, whatever. If you want something, you'll
ask. And if you ask for it, they
may say it's over there.
You know, like, meaning, they the expectation
it doesn't enter even their mind that the
expectation is that you they're gonna get it
for you.
But the benefit of that is what? The
benefit of that is that,
it's not difficult for them to keep you
there so you can stay and you can
come and you keep meeting each other, and
you're happy when you keep meeting each other.
I I I mean, I understand that many
of us come from cultures that are not
like that,
in which if we do this, to explain
to someone that this is a good thing
is gonna be so foreign to their
sensibility. They won't understand. In fact, they won't
even stick around long enough for you to
explain it to them.
So you may offend people wildly by by
doing things like that. And so if you
wanna, like, spare yourself from that,
you know, that's that's understandable.
I understand. I understand. I get that.
But we should have a way of meeting
one another that
doesn't cause annoyance.
And this is one of the things that
we miss
living in a culture that's not built around
Islam.
People oftentimes say, oh, that's not Islam. That's
just culture. Mahid, the culture is built around
Islam.
Much
of much of what we find as angst
between our
Islamic cultures
and between the practice of the deen
has to do with something that's out of
place or misunderstood or misapplied.
Yes. There are certain cultural
practices that are just wrong,
but by and large,
it has to do more with, you know,
things that are not applied correctly or not
understood correctly.
Houses in much of the Muslim world are
built such that
the
house has a front room
that is called a number of different things,
but it has a front room that's close
to the outside or may actually have its
own separate outside entrance.
And it is a room that people can
come, sit down, you can meet them in,
and they never see the inside of your
house.
It's easy to keep clean. It's easy to
keep orderly, and
really no foreign male should foreign not meaning
like citizenship foreign, but, like, not your relative
or not someone really close to you. No
foreign male should really ever see the inside
of your house. They should not see your
wife's clothing. They should not see, you know,
like, the dishes. They should not know whether
things are clean or or not clean. They
shouldn't see any of those things.
And they don't have to. Why? Because the
house is built such. And the thing is
someone's like, well, I don't have enough money
to build the house myself, which I don't
have the money to build the house myself,
and many of you may not have the
money to build the house
yourself
either. You just bought it from someone else.
Well, when you live in one of these
cultures and someone else who built the house
in the first place also builds it with
this in mind.
The point is is that they
lived a life such that it facilitated
implementing these values
in a correct way so that you can
have guests over, and it's not a big
deal.
You know, you'd say the door is unlocked,
helped yourself in, I'll be home in 5
minutes,
instead of having to, like, you know, go
out of your way and, like, just make
all this crazy,
you know, arrangements in order to fulfill a
kind of a basic standard.
And what happens is when you do things
beyond your means
in anything,
whether it's buying a car,
whether it's buying a house, whether it's buying
clothing, whether
it's serving a guest, whether it's donating to
the Masjid,
whether it's funding
your favorite
small non Masjid space that you make zikr
and go to Darsat,
with the charismatic demagogue,
figure
who, you know, like, whatever, cuts you off
from your family slowly in order to initiate
you into his cult that, like, controls every
aspect of your life to the point where,
like, 20 years later, you're like, where has
all the time gone?
In any of those things, moderation is important.
This is one of the reasons that,
even in in in rebat, I know I
know the way to, you know, fill bombs
on seats and make a a big,
gathering and to drive things politically
and to get more YouTube views and more
YouTube hits and what to say to what
person that will make them happy and what
will you know, to say what person that'll
make them give money. I've seen all of
these pranks pulled. I've seen all of these
scams pulled on other people.
I say that there are some people who
do these things and they leverage these things.
They're in a position to leverage these things
in order to serve the Haqq. Go ahead
and do it.
My duas are with you. But if the
point is to tell people about the spiritual
path, if the point is to tell the
people about the sunnah, none of these things
are the sunnah.
This is one of the differentiators
Mu'awiya
not one of the Khalifa Rashidun.
Even though I don't say anything ill about
him, and I actually say that the Muslims
benefited a great amount from him in a
way that people don't acknowledge, they should acknowledge.
But it was clear even to say, Nama
radiya ahu from the very first day that
he understood how to deal with people politically,
and he was into it. He jumped into
it from day 1.
So the Omar would chastise him when he
went to Sham. So why are you guys
dressed like this? Why are you guys, you
know, act like this? Why do you behave
like this? What is this protocol? What is
he knew that this is how the Romans
are used to doing things.
This is how you're gonna get things done.
In the age that he was in with
the people he was around, he did a
good job, actually.
But that
isn't negated by recognizing that there's a path
higher than that.
The memory of which the recognition of which
is a
to recognize its superiority or even to remember
what it was or what it is.
And its practice also has to stay alive
in the ummah at some point because all
of those things are shortcuts toward your,
goal that end up bypassing things that you're
gonna need at another time or another place.
You may not just immediately need it right
now.
So
coming back to this issue of takaluf,
stop for the sake of the Lord. Stop
making takaluf in things.
Stop buying things that you don't have the
ability to buy in cash unless
complete need.
God forbid.
Somebody's child or somebody's loved one needs a
medicine, and they need it now, and they
can't afford it except for by borrowing money
on riba or this or that or put
it on the credit card.
The muftis, go talk to them. They'll tell
you this is dais, you know, with such
and such conditions. Just do it and ask
Allah for his help. Allah test people in
different ways.
But your need for a brand new car
is not like that.
Your need for new furniture
when you get married is not like that.
Your need for a particular type of house
is 100%
not like that.
Your need for having a wedding of a
particular type is 100%
not like that.
And that time, that energy,
that
mental bandwidth,
those resources that you should have been saving
for what?
For the service of the deen of Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala.
It's not being wasted on usurers,
on banks,
on stupid companies that make garbage that's all
made in the same China.
The money of which is spent
by
people who are imprisoning our brothers and sisters
in camps and torturing them, and even if
they're not still like a atheist abomination.
Someone says, well, you know, Joe Biden and
Donald Trump don't strike me as god fearing
people either. Okay. Don't waste the money on
them either.
What are you saying you like? Don't waste
the money on him either.
General so and so, king so and so,
sultan so and so, Amir so and so
is awesome. Don't give them the money either.
Oh, he tells the Arabia we should boycott.
Why don't you boycott? Go to the gas
station. Walk somewhere.
It might help you get married as well.
Your dearth of marriage proposals might actually increase
after, like, a couple of months of walking.
This
is important. Why? Because there's a difference on
the day of judgment between someone who's gonna
show up and be a Muslim, a believer,
and someone who's gonna be from the party
of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.
The former are more typified by, like, do
I have to? Do I not have to?
Can I, like, ask for forgiveness and be
forgiven? And the answer is you don't have
to most of the time. And even if
you do and you don't do it, you'll
probably be forgiven at some point or another
if you ask for forgiveness. Even if you
don't, a lot of stuff is gonna be
forgiven. Even if you don't, it'll still work
out in the end.
But if you want to be from the
party of the Rasool Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam on
the day of judgment, you have to start
thinking differently than this. You have to start
thinking differently than this. You have to have
your it has to be
in how it is that we can do
this work, how this is that we can
be from the of Rasool Allah sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. This project, which is definitely not
just I'm going to Jannah and then throw
up the deuces.
And so Takaluf destroys all of these things.
And
so don't don't be that person. Step 1.
Most of you are not that person anyway.
Otherwise, you wouldn't be here on a Sunday.
Don't let your wife do it
to
you. If she does it too much, it
may be time for a different wife.
The girl you like,
you may not actually like her as much
as you think you like her.
If your husband is like that, a little
bit more difficult to extricate yourself from that
situation. So don't marry someone like that in
the first place.
What's the problem?
Well, he has shiny this and he has
a nice that and he has this and
that. If you're gonna sell your daughters,
sisters, if you're gonna sell yourselves,
fathers, brothers, if you're gonna sell your daughters
for that type of stuff, there's a word
for it in the English language. It's not
a nice word.
Don't
do it.
How many of our olema, how many of
our mashay have married their daughters to princes
and kings.
People have renowned people who commanded clout in
society, married their daughters to simple and humble
men.
Why? Because it's it's a man. Ironically ironically,
she'll be happier with such a such a
such a man.
But some ladies have been known to say
that don't impress me much.
The
point is that all of this stuff ends
up sinking the ship.
You get
linked up with someone like that.
You wasted your own life because you will
do for your wife if you love her.
What you wouldn't do for yourself,
you will do for your children
what your wife tells you do because you
love them, and you know that you're at
that point, breaking your relationship with her is
breaking them as well.
Because marriages can end legally, but the relationship
never ends. Till the day you die, you'll
still remember one another and it will still
hurt.
All of this stuff, if you're a solid,
avoid it as much as you can mitigate
it. Someone's like, well, I can I can
divorce my wife? What do I do? It's
my mother who does it to me. It's
my father who does it to me. It's
my brothers and sisters who do it to
me. It's this person. It's that person that
I can't cut off, and I can't, like,
make hinge it off from my I just
get I can't just get up and leave.
Right?
And this is why, you know, I use
this word all the time when telling people
about how to deal with their personal relationships.
There's ways of circumnavigating
such problems.
Through avoidance,
you won't no one will be alive forever.
Through avoidance, you can definitely mitigate and keep
at bay certain issues.
Your respect for your mother, your love for
your mother doesn't include becoming a complete idiot
and, like, destroying yourself and destroying her because
that's actually the opposite of love and the
opposite of respect. Right?
It doesn't mean that they're like some sort
of infallible source of
of of righteousness.
In fact,
nobody
is after the prophet
All of these
all of these
that people, they're they have so much love
for them. Just let them go.
Let them it's okay.
Just let them go. Let the dreams, the
desires for them
go. Replace them with other dreams, better dreams,
and better desires
with
you know, because someone's like, okay. Look. You
know, like, I would like to have, like,
this, like, wonderful Tesla that,
you know, will finally make me happy. And,
it'll make me run faster and jump higher
and control my blood sugar and lose weight
and,
you know, get me into Harvard and, like,
there's some magical thing of the duniya that
a person's like, oh, it's like everything I
ever needed.
If it's not you can't get it if
you can get it without takalluf, then please
go ahead and do it. You know, say
in in the beginning at
the end and thank Allah for it.
If it's something that there's and you're like,
look, the choice is now either is testing
me, either this or either, you know, I
go to Hajj.
Either this or
I, you know, learn to read the Quran.
Either this or I learn my farda'in.
Either this or I go to Umrah in
the year. Either this or I can go
pray salat with taraweeh. Either this or I
can, you know,
fulfill something.
There are all sorts of different ways a
person can worship Allah,
but, like, it's something that you know you
can do. You're good at it. You'll enjoy
it. It'll be better for you in this
world and the hereafter. It's either this or
that.
Either this or I, you know, I I
hear that 5 times a day.
Either this or I, you know, serve my
parents. Either this or I, you know, Again,
without the color. But either this or I
serve my parents, you know, the things that
they need from me.
Don't think of it as giving something up.
Think of it as getting a better bargain
for your time, better bargain for your money.
Because if you focus and you obsess about
the thing that you're giving up or the
thing that you're losing, then it will feel
like a loss.
If you look at the thing that you're
gaining,
in return,
which is
should be primarily something that's in the hereafter,
but also has benefits in this world as
well,
then it will be easier to let it
go.
But a person has to train themselves. Otherwise,
nobody likes to give
you every monkey likes shiny things. Everyone likes
something that tastes good. Everyone likes, you know,
a beautiful face. Everybody likes, a nice car.
Everybody likes all of these things, and there's
nothing wrong with liking them. They're actually good
things. They're nice things. If they weren't good
things, they wouldn't be there in Jannah for
you.
Allah Ta'ala would have not put them in
in Jannah for you. These are all these
are all these are all,
like, things of of
some sort of beauty in it. It's just
a matter of putting it in the in
the in the
right place.
And,
Abdul Abin Amir, may Allah be pleased with
both of them, said that
we were
prohibited.
The idea being that,
prohibited by who? Prohibited by the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam. That we are prohibited by
for making tikaluf in things. It's being going
over the top,
in things.
Masrook, the famous,
the famous Tabiri in Mujadif,
said that we entered upon Abdul Abin Masrood
and he said, oh, people,
whoever amongst you knows something, then let them
say what they know.
You know something's haram. You know something's halal.
How many prayers are there? There are 5.
Do you know something? Let them speak according
to their knowledge. And whoever doesn't know something,
let them say Allah knows best.
Because it's also part of knowledge to be
able to say,
Allah knows best when you don't know something.
And then he said that Allah ta'ala said
to his prophet
say, I don't ask you, for any reward
and nor am I person of the nor
am I person who does things that have
no point.
The abandonment of which is praiseworthy, and the,
performance of which is blameworthy.
Although it's not mentioned in this chapter here.
Who
also narrates a,
a statement with regards to the praise of
the companions of the messenger of Allah
And one of the one of the things
that he says in their praise
of that the companions of the prophet were
the
least of people in Takaluf. They're the least
of people in their affectation
in doing these things that have no point.
The doing of which is blameworthy and the
abandonment of which is praiseworthy.
So think about that when you choose what
you wanna do with your life. You're in
America now.
You do whatever you like. It's a free
country.
So think about how you wanna have your
house.
Do you wanna have your house like the
or do you wanna have your house like
the houses of the companions
Do you want to get married like the
companions who got married? Do you wanna get
married like,
you know, some weird, like, quasi secularist out
weirdo from, like, 19 seventies, whatever country you're
from,
where people like themselves look like someone, you
know, resemble a corpse of pharaoh in the
British Museum,
and, put up a picture on their social
media and say, oh, look how amazing that
x y z country was because there's women
wearing miniskirts in the picture. Let's declare war
on it. Like, what what which which thing
do you wanna look like?
Which life do you want to live? What
do you want to resemble?
You can ask, is it permissible or not?
And then some mufti or some faqih will
tell you,
but then you choose what it is that
you wanna do,
and,
you deal with it then afterward. You say,
oh, no. I wanted to be like the
companions, but not like life is so hard.
It wasn't supposed to be this way. Well,
yes and no.
Maybe some other piece of your life is
not fitting together with it. When you fix
that as well, you will be content. You
will be at peace. Or maybe you're going
through a difficulty right now. That's actually less
than the difficulty you'll go through when you
do the other thing.
Of course, these things require thinking,
through, and they require some patience and some
skill and understanding.
And, no matter how noble your intentions are,
being stupid is always difficult.
So Allah protect us and help us all.
But this is your choice. You can do
what you like the way, the way that
you like it. And there's again, there's no
harm in having a nice house and no
harm in having a good car.
Being like LOTA KALUF is different for different
people.
If you're making if you're making 5 $100,000
a year, $1,000,000 a year, something like that,
and it's not really all that difficult for
you, then it's okay. Go buy a car
that has, like, a AC that works or
whatever. Right? Don't be like, who come look
at the companions? Because they were from the
companions,
people who had nice things.
But none of them would pay for stuff
so much that it would hold them back
from going on jihad in the path of
Allah ta'ala. Why? Because they're companions. The people
who their, like, finances held them back from
going out with the prophet
They're not companions at all. They were the.
They were the.
And Allah protect us from being those people.
That's a very scary realization because when you
look at our own lives and the lives
of the people that we love,
around us and some of the people even
that we held up as exemplars.
It's scary sometimes. Allah forgive us. Don't call
don't point at someone and say you're or
I'm a just ask for forgiveness. If something
is wrong, then think about, is it really
wrong or not? Examine it. Was there really
a better way of doing things? And if
there was, then do it better in the
future,
instead of dwelling
on the past.
This is the,
the chapter regarding the prohibition,
of
performative
mourning over the dead
and beating your
your face,
and ripping your,
the collar of your,
your clothing,
and pulling your hair out,
and shaving your head,
all in performative mourning
and crying out, oh, we've been destroyed. Oh,
we've been destroyed,
which is all these are all performative,
acts of mourning that the Jahili Arabs used
to do,
in Jahiliyyah and some of them still do.
Especially in the next month, you'll see if
you wanna see what all this looks like,
you'll see it in next month. There'll be
large processions going through,
certain cities, not only of the Arab heartland,
but even,
in the Indian subcontinent and other places. You
can see you can see all these things,
literally, like, as if someone read the hadith
and all the things the prophet forbid, they're
doing all of them. Like, after having read
the descriptions in the hadith, they're doing them
all like that.
So if you wanna see what it looks
like, what Jahili looks like, you can go
see
it inshallah. If not, someone will forward you,
like, a a a YouTube video link afterward.
Said Omar Ibn Khattab
who narrates that the prophet
says
deceased
is tormented in his grave,
because of
what was said in the performative mourning,
over his death,
or as long as his death is being
performatively
mourned.
So what does this mean?
I die.
Joe was like, oh, what a big distraction.
What we this and he starts pulling out
his hair and he starts,
beating himself and ripping his whatever and stuff.
And then why am I getting
tormented in my grave for it?
There are a number of different
explanations. All of them,
in my opinion, are actually true at the
same time.
1 is, like, my rule will be in
the
grave,
seeing and hearing
all of this. If I'm some sort of,
like, super Wally, maybe I'll be able to
see it, like, whatever life. You know? Like,
I'll be I'll be there, like, with him
wherever he is or whatever.
If I'm, like, more like basic package, barely,
like, scratched by or whatever, maybe someone, like,
whatever,
Someone pious, like,
I don't know.
Whoever views pious will, like, you know, and,
like, die. We'll be like, yeah. You know
what? Jawad is, like, yelling straight and it
will make me feel bad. I'll be like,
what is this clown doing? This is haram.
It's gonna be a sin on his head.
It will cause me some it's not I
won't be happy. Right?
This is the the kind of, like, the
base base level, the floor of what the
meaning of this is. That it will be
a a sadness that this is a disobedience
of Allah ta'ala. It's not helping me at
all. Why would somebody be doing this?
And it escalates from there.
And the escalation of the torment has to
do with what your connection with that torment
or what your connection with that performative mourning
is. Some people used to actually
do this for others while they were alive,
and they used
to venerate this for others while they're alive.
And they used to they actually left
instructions that when I die, I want this
to happen. I want that to happen. You
know, these kind of gatherings in which all
this nonsense happens.
Or the person knew it was gonna happen,
and they didn't actively
stop that from happening.
Obviously, the second is not as bad as
the third
or the first sorry. The second is not
the first is not as bad as the
the second is not as bad as the
first.
But still, there's some sort of participation in
this as well.
Where Malek is.
You know?
Maybe some of the more, you know,
literalist leaning schools will have some discussion with
regards to this. But at any rate,
you could understand why it's not a good
thing. If you knew it was gonna happen
anyway, you didn't do anything to stop it.
Because of that, the angels will
torment and torture the person,
in their grave as well.
So all of this will unfold in the
subsequent hadith.
The one who
beats
his cheeks and the one who,
rips his,
collar
and the one who, cries out the cries
of the age of ignorance, that one is
not one of us,
which is a problem because the prophet
the ones who are with him are the
ones who go to Jannah.
So it's it's it's a big problem. It's
a big issue.
Run and grab it from where you
Abuborda,
relates
Abu Burda, who is, one of the, he
relates that Abu Musa Al Ashari
who was in intense pain
to the point that he passed out.
And, his head was in the lap of
a woman from his family
mentions the name
and,
that it was his wife.
So this is from the
because something is mentioned that she does that's
not really the best. So from from other
date, he didn't mention who it was, but
it was known who it was. It was
his wife and
her name is,
her name is mentioned by, Sayyuti.
Her name is Sofia Tablutu. Abi
Domen.
The
point of mentioning it is not to say
anything bad about her. We're all hopefully, everyone
here has enough common sense to know that
she's
a way better person than any of us
here. But the the point is is that
it's these are not like
Khurafat.
Just like stories that people tell, but they
actually have some some origin. Abu Burda is
a he's a known hadith. He's not gonna
just, like, airy fairy, just recall everything he
he heard or whatever.
So he passed out, and his head was
in the lap of a woman from his
family.
And,
so he passed out. Not a good sign,
generally speaking. It's not a good health indicator.
I'm not a doctor, but,
generally, consciousness is a is a good thing.
So she started she started to, like,
scream,
in a
in a in a particular tone.
And he was unable to unable to, like,
say anything to her,
while this is happening. Why? Because he's, like
like, not he's not in it. He's he's
passed out.
So when he,
he came back to consciousness,
he said, I have nothing to do with
anyone that the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam
dissociated from.
And indeed, the messenger dissociated
from,
a woman who or not well, here it's
a woman because it's
the the gender he mentioned is the feminine
gender, but the point is it's anybody. It
could be anyone. In this particular context, you
have to pick one gender or another. But
he said that the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam
dissociated from the salika.
The salika is the the the woman who
starts,
you know, screaming
the
oh, soft, the the praiseworthy traits of the
deceased.
So I have nothing to do with that
that that that woman who starts screaming,
the traits of the deceased or the woman
who shaves her head,
out of out of her grief,
or the woman who,
rips her
clothes.
Says that the person
who is you know, people make a big
show of mourning over him,
that person will be, tormented
on the day of judgment,
in connection with what was said about him
in his
while they were mourning him.
And, this is going to be explained in
the sub quantity, hadith as well. Again, this
is for the people who
either
told people to do it or made arrangements
for them,
to do it or,
didn't stop it even though they had a
feeling it was gonna happen. This is not
for the people who people did it without
you know, despite knowing their objections to such
things.
Again, this is it was such an ingrained
part of Jahiliyyah
that the companions
wasn't immediately
apparent to all of them that this is
a bad thing. Like when said that Hamza
was shaheed,
they felt sad because there was nobody there
to mourn him.
So the ladies actually got together out of
love and respect for the prophet
and his family and for him giving his
life in the sake of Allah ta'ala. They
actually got together and started to, like, you
know, do this for him because there was
no one there to do it for him.
So they felt bad.
And the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam, like, stop
them from from from doing that.
Where does this come from?
It comes from the idea that you only
know the duniya,
because death is like a really scary thing
for
living
things in general,
like you and me.
Someone could say, like, you know, like,
is inflamed with, like, the
the the the the heat of iman.
And he's like, I'm not scared to death.
I'm gonna go to Allah Ta'ala, and this
is gonna happen. Yeah. But, like, you don't
wanna, like
the cessation of vital functions, like, it's not
good. It's not a thing that a person,
like, feels warm and cozy feelings about a
mistake.
You know?
They have such issues that probably someone should,
like, give them a 15% off coupon for
a little center or whatever. Right?
So
this is how people cope with the fact
that death is inevitable
for everybody.
It's all cope.
When we, you know, I you know, we
go we go to the graveyard. Sadly, there
are not many Muslim only graveyards, so we
oftentimes just have, like, reserved sections in other
graveyards. And so you see
weird,
sarcophagi
and statues and angels and crypts and gargoyles
and, you know, weird names,
you know, etched in the side, and military
honors and this and that. It's all cope.
You're dead, bro.
You don't take any of that with you.
Some people, it's the person themselves coping, so
they, you know, arrange for this to happen
after they're gone. Another thing, it's somebody else's
coping
because they realize that this is this person
that was so much meant so much to
them, they're gone now. They're they're, you know,
this dunya and them, they're that's it. It's
not it's over. It's finished.
It's all cope, and Muslims do this cope
as well.
And it's all
cope. 100%
cope.
It's okay if someone died. Like, you feel
bad about it. Right?
Someone said, oh, hamza.
What a nice guy.
He used to serve you know, he used
to, like I don't know.
Serve serve tea after Rial de Salahi. What
a nice guy. Abdullah is like, how does
the one serve the tea actually? But, like,
you know,
you feel that way. Now I'm done. Now
I'm dead. You're like, that's the end of
the line for him. That's like, how I
can't deal with it. How can it like,
he was a good guy, and now it's
done.
But instead
of building a statue or building a plaque
or or or or any of these other
stupid cope copes that people do,
Make a du offer. The person that benefits
them gives $5 of
benefits them. Do these types of things that
benefits them. The dua, the being the best
of things, and then all the other things
that you saw the sawab,
you know, they,
you know, there there's in all of them.
This type of stuff is a complete copse.
The prophet was, like, trying to explain to
them that explain to the the people of
Jahiliyyah that this is a cop. Don't fall
don't fall into it.
And so
that's why that's why they used to do
it. And so it's bad enough when people
spent their entire life worshiping, like, Latin Oz,
and the the the, you know,
it's it's bad enough when they did it,
but they didn't know any better. For us,
we really should know better, and they knew
better once the prophet explained it to them.
She said that,
and it's also Nasiba
according to some. She said that,
the prophet
when he first took the took the oath
of allegiance from us,
he actually asked in the bayah. He actually
one of the terms of the bayah that
they took the oath of allegiance on was
that we would not never we would never,
like, do this, like, big show of mourning
when when someone died.
Any of you ever, like, been to the
where, like, people
take the? They say that they are. Right?
That's what the that's what those are the
things that are said. Right? That we won't
commit. Should we take this big oath that
we won't, make toba from and from shirk
and from and from stealing and from these
are the things the prophet used to.
When people would put their hands in their
hands, and still a Muslim by saying
but when they would they would they would
take the oath of fealty from them, he
would mention these things. And so she said
that's one of the things that used to
mention
that, that the women would would would would
promise that they're not never gonna do this.
So,
Nurmaban bin Bashir narrates that Abdulobin Rawa
in the battle of Moqta,
and a companion of great worth.
All of them were of great worth, but
even amongst them,
that,
he
passed out.
So his sister started his sister started screaming.
What
a mountain he was, and what
what of this he was, and what of
that he was. That's the
the
the the the dad that was mentioned from
before that they would scream the
praiseworthy characteristics of the person who died.
And,
he said after he regained consciousness,
that
I
whenever you would say mention my one of
my characteristics, I was mockingly asked, are you
really like
that? And this is part of the part
this is mentioned in the in the,
in one of the subsequent hadiths,
that this is part of the
part of
the adab that the person experiences when
the the the the mourners will scream all
of these things, and the angels will then
mock the person, say, are you really like
that?
And that's described a little bit, in more
detail.
Bin Ubada
you know, was
complained of the difficulty that he was going
through when he was dying.
Come here not the meaning of complaint is
not that he made a complaint, but meaning
when he's suffering, when he was he could
complain, I guess, is
the the the way it's supposed to be
taken.
When he's suffering from his, the the affliction
from which he passed,
the Rasul salallahu alaihi wa sallam visited him
with Abdul Rahman bin Auf and Sa'ad Abi
Waqas and Abdullah bin Mas'ud.
May Allah be pleased with them.
And so when he entered,
upon him and he found that he was
unconscious, he asked, has he passed? And they
said, no, messenger of Allah. And the messenger
of Allah
wept. And when he wept,
and the people saw the prophet
weeping, they also wept. And he then instructed
them. He says, do do you not hear
me? Indeed, Allah will not
torment,
because of the tears of the eye or
the grief of the heart. But he will
torment because of this, and,
he pointed to his tongue or he'll have
mercy. Meaning what?
Someone died, you cry.
One thing is, like, the performative wailing and
things like that. One thing is it just
makes you cry.
That's not something that that anyone will be
tormented for.
Or you feel really bad because someone you
love died.
That's not or someone died. That's not what
you're going to be punished for. Rather, the
messenger of Allah sallallahu alaihi wasallam
pointed to his tongue and he said that
it's because of this. If someone starts mouthing
off, starts screaming, or starts talking
about things that in a pointless way or
excessive way,
that's what Allah Ta'ala will torment a person
because of, or he'll have mercy. Meaning what?
You can also use the tongue and say
May Allah forgive such a person. This is
such a difficult loss. Allah give us consolation
in our loss. Allah give us patience. Make
dua.
Do something good with your tongue instead of
nothing off.
The prophet the messenger of Allah
said
that the performative screaming woman, if she doesn't
make toba, if she doesn't
repent from
from this act before she dies.
On the day of judgment, she will be
resurrected
and
be made to wear
a garment of tar,
of hot tar and,
on top of it, an overgarment,
of,
of of, like, skin lesions.
From the things that the prophet
had us
pledge
in amongst those good things that he he
had us pledge, expected us to do.
And to never,
to never disobey him in was that we
should never scratch our faces, which is one
of the things that they used to do
as a sign of,
how genuine their warning was or whatever,
nor to scream, oh, we've been destroyed,
or or something like that,
nor to,
rip their collars,
nor to pull hair out,
in his performative mourning.
There's 2 more hadiths, inshallah. We'll read the
we'll read them. The Darce has gone a
little
longer
than normal.
This is something
further explanation of something that was alluded to
in a previous hadith.
He said that no person dies.
And then afterward, the the
big
show of mourning is made for them.
The people, the professional criers start crying over
them,
or the performative criers, I should say, start
crying over them and say things like, oh,
what a mountain he was. Oh, what a
great leader he was,
or something like that. Except for Allah
dispatches and entrusts 2 angels
that will, like, push him
with force. Allah has to push with
the entire palm of your hand on on
on someone's chest with
with full force
or with both hands with full force that
they'll they'll keep pushing him,
and ask him, were you really like such
a big mountain? Were you really like such
a big leader? Were you really this? Were
you really
that? Again, this has to do with the
people who intentionally
wanted this to happen, made provision for it
to happen, knew it was gonna happen, and
didn't stop it.
But this is this and that's the thing
that was from the cash. We you know,
said Abdullah bin Rawaha, he was saying that
it was, like, being said to me. That
was Kash. It wasn't actually happening. He wasn't
because he wasn't actually dead.
But it was something Allah showed him that
this is what where all of this ends
up.
But a good person, if someone did it,
that's
has nothing to do with them. At most,
the adav they have is what? It's like,
stop acting like a clown. This is not
good for you. It's not good for me.
It makes them feel bad that that thing
is happening,
which you don't want to, you know, cause
a a person you love anyway, but it's
not going to be like this. This is
for those people who didn't make provision to
stop it. And the final hadith in the
chapter,
So that there are 2 people,
Rasulullah, sallallahu alaihi,
that he said there are 2 people from
amongst people
that, there's still some Kufrin then.
Obviously, we're not saying that that person's a
non Muslim automatically off the bat. Kufr here
can mean that there is some attributes of
a nonbeliever in them or that there is
some gross
level of ingratitude to the Lord in them
or some gross defect in them.
But the word kufar is used at any
rate. The connotation is really severe, so it's
used on purpose
that there are still kufar in them. 1
is to,
mock another man because of his
lineage,
and the other is to,
is to,
make performative mourning
over someone who died. May Allah protect us
from it and from all other types of
kufr and all other of kufr.
Allah make us such that, you know, our
loved ones are people who understand what what's
beneficial to us, and they'll do the things
that harm us, that give us the good
sense also of not harming,
others and not doing, you know, know, stupid
things that don't benefit the ones that we
love either.