Haleh Banani – Keys To Improve Your Marriage – 03 – Physical Intimacy

			Another common problem faced by Muslim couples is physical intimacy in the attempt of raising chass
daughters, some Muslim parents have have a tendency to use scare tactics, and without realizing the
negative impact that it will have on their daughters once they get married. Now, this negative
impact is that the daughter starts feeling some very negative association, they have negative
association, they feel that it is they feel like the act is dirty and sinful. And they feel
belittled. And this really affects their marriage. And I cannot tell you the number of couples that
I have worked with that actually, the the female cries after the act because of all of this, all of
		

			this associated negative association that she has now, it's very admirable to want to raise chast
daughters, but we have to be very careful to, to specify that this act is beautiful in the state in
the halaal. Marriage, and not to make it something evil or sinful or dirty. And my my friends and I
Saba say yet or Marine, and Hannah's a bear from Muslim matters, we did a an hour program on Muslim
matters, it was called intimacy matters. And we really expanded on the reasons people are not having
good physical intimacy, the causes and the solutions, and it has helped and hamdulillah many of my
clients who listened to it, they were able to overcome their negative outlook. A lot of times, there
		

			is a complaint about either quantity or quality. And generally, the men are complaining about the
quantity and the females are complaining about the quality. So it's really important to address this
because if if one person is not being completely fulfilled, it will affect the closeness, the
intimacy of the relationship. So these are things that need to be discussed. I know that the
majority of the clients that I have had never discuss these issues with their spouse, they feel
maybe embarrassed and it feels awkward to bring it up. But it is essential to discuss it if you need
help get the help that you need, because it is a critical aspect of your life. The Prophet
		

			sallallahu Sallam said that the person who gets married the marriage completes half of your deen.
And so this is a big part of it. Because when you're fulfilled in this manner, then you are not
affected as much by the fitna that is out there when you are not fulfilled, then it opens you up to
so many things outside of your marriage. And another complaint is about taking initiative and being
responsive. Many, many females see this as just a duty and an obligation. They may feel wrong to
even want it or desire it. And so they do it more as an act of obligation. And this really affects
the quality of the relationship. So it's very important to take initiative and to be responsive.