Haifaa Younis – Why I Shouldn’t Lie Even a White Lie
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the concept of lying and how it can lead to negative consequences, including negative consequences for insecurity, habit, lack of trust, and desire for a status. They emphasize the importance of truthfulness and avoiding false assumptions. The conversation also touches on the topic of insecurity, habit, and a haunted woman, while joking around with others. The speakers stress the importance of trustworthiness and avoiding false assumptions.
AI: Summary ©
Single I chose this topic we didn't get the email from the gentleman what I'm going to talk about lining
right and everybody's smiling
I hope you don't have to lie type so why do we lie? That's the first question and the second one especially for our youth so what's wrong with it? I didn't mean it. It's just a word. Don't make it a big deal Don't you hear this right? Third it's becoming so norm. So norm and I'm not saying only here wherever you are. And please forgive me whatever age we are
young and old you know a mother and grandmother a college student whatever it is norm to the point that if you don't lie you're abnormal.
Am I exaggerating?
So what's wrong with it?
So what let's let's let's lie I didn't mean it no one gets hurt. Maybe I'm making somebody happy. So I was looking at it actually enforcing I looked at is what is the definition of lying?
So how do I know I'm lying? I
think within
six something is not the truth. Okay. Well, it's the truth, I think is the truth.
So number one, number one for me, before I judge anyone and by the way, this is for me, meaning for each one of us. Don't think oh, I know she's lies. Oh, I know, she's a liar. This is not the issue. The issue is me. Am I this? Have I ever done it? So what should I do? So lying in general number one is when I say something, and when I do something, lying is two things, singing and doing and I'll share with you an iron the Quran, which most of you probably all have, you know, sharp. So when I say something, that is opposite reality,
and I do something that is opposite reality. That's Carib blind. Let's take the famous story in the Koran. What's the most famous story in the Quran? Say your name Joseph. Right. So when his brothers came back to their father, they did this exactly they send ended
right What did they do? So you all know they took Satan and use it for him in the world came back. Right deja vu about whom Asia and Europe Kuhn came back in the night to their father crying.
Really sad.
polyuria burner all they said now lying with words all year abana. Oh, Daddy. Oh, father. We went out to play left Yusuf and Wolf. Ah,
this is like, obvious why
it didn't happen. And absolutely nothing to do with reality. So this is saying where it is the action? Would you wanna Cammisa? He didn't incur them. They brought his shirt with blood. That's lying in action. So they did it both. And then they know they are lying. And what did they say to their father? Woman woman at Walmart. And then why not?
Help Be humble.
And to be more meaning Lennar and and you will not believe us. They know they are lying. And you will not believe us, although although they bought that shirt, so they said and bought the shirt and said, You're not gonna believe us? So first thing, I'm gonna remember me. Not anyone here. Each one here. Have I ever done that?
Have I ever said something? And I know it's not the truth. Because there's two kinds of flying lying by mistake. For example, I said, when I was coming, I thought 141 was closed.
And I turned to be wrong. I didn't lie by intention. Versus I know which was open. And I say, one 141 is closed on money.
So basically, have I ever done it intentionally or not intentional? And if I've never done it at hamdulillah I really doubt it. So second thing comes in. Has it ever been mentioned in the origin? This is where we go first. Our source has Kevin lying mentioned in the Quran.
It's either yes or no I don't know. You're not supposed to lie. No, no. is the word lying? Get mentioned in the Quran? Yes or no? Good morning, ladies. Why you are so quiet. Of course. Yes. Right. How many times I don't expect you to know
Cuz I didn't know I looked it up, right? 176 times. Exactly. I was like, Whoa
176 in the book of law, in the words of a law 100 times 76 times, either the word lying itself, liars, they lie in all the forms. So 176 when you say something frequent, what does that mean?
When you tell your son, your child, your daughter, your colleague, do this, do this, do this, or don't do this, don't do this, don't do this. You keep saying it, what does it mean? It's a something pay attention to otherwise you will mentioned once or twice, so number one is frequently mentioned in the Quran. Number two, in which way did Allah praise it? And I actually looked at it and I have this book which has every aisle that the word lining or lawyers came in, never in the Quran, and I'm saying never. It came in a form of praise. Never Allah praise the action, nor the person. In fact, it's the opposite. It's the opposite in the beginning of salthill, Baccarat levena cafaro What can
the movie IR Tina, look at the those who rejected and did not believe in our book or science, they will have the hellfire. So never ever it was praised. frequently mentioned once Allah subhanaw taala wants to put down a human being in the Quran. One of the description is cadott is a liar.
For example, furong clearout can dibawa
he rejected and turned away?
Never was what he sought to set on hasha was described in this absolutely the opposite of what was he described
before he became a prophet
aside, well, I mean hamdullah you all know right? The truthful, the trustworthy, so never, ever came as a praise in the Quran. Come to the Sunnah, and this is a hadith out wherever you go. Look at this subject, this hadith comes in first. And it's an order a request from your beloved in mind roswaal he saw two Sir, what did he say?
Ali can be subtle.
Be truthful.
Take truthfulness as your character.
Why are Osama?
Why? And he gives you because you know you and me are the wondering as they call this
being truthful, will lead you to be righteous.
And while
being grateful, righteous will take you to Jannah if I asked everyone in this room, or yourself or me, you want to go to Ghana? The answer is Come on What do you even ask? So it's like of course here you go. That's the recipe or a compass to be truthful truthful meaning your character because the next thing he said what email more or less do the human being take truthfulness as her character constant till she is called saw they also do. And now if you now remember someone, and all of you probably will remember who was called the subject.
So you know why, why?
You never
actually know why he was called abubakr Sonic now this is ABC question trivia for Sunday school.
Why?
Because he believed in a restaurant so to sum everything he said. So Rosario Sato, Sam called the Moscow geek. And you know the famous line when they came to him after we arrived on the site or went to Jerusalem, and they came in it says, Your friend does say, in the night, he went to Jerusalem and came back. Like imagine, I really want you to imagine now of course, it was the big deal. You know, we'll take a plane and we'll be here. And he looked at that, and he said, he told me,
he got revelation from, from Allah from the Creator, and I believed him Do you think I'm not going to believe in him telling me he wants a juicer? So Sadiq Ali Khan, this'll be truthful. truthfulness will take you to righteousness. Righteousness will take you to gender. And he immediately said the opposite. What year como el Khatib. Look at the word. Be aware of lying. What year come when you tell your child beware
Beware usually it is something you're really worried about. It's different than you say don't do. But when we say beware we are Komal Khatib, but in academia, if you're lying, when it becomes a character, it will lead to corruption.
And you all know nodding your hand.
And corruption will lead to john.
And the person human being will continue to lie to he or she will be called liar. Have you seen people who says, Oh, don't believe what she says? She always like panela we hear this? He or she? And these days you see it even and you hear it without going to the details. Right? So I Lee call Bill, Bill. What? Yeah, come we'll get him. That's the most beloved that you all. Pamela. They're happy that you took it nobody will do what you just said beloved Rasul Allah Sato Sir, I was just reading the sheet. Right? That's what he advised you on one. The second thing, if someone said to me, and I'm gonna, I'm not gonna say said to you said you are a hypocrite.
Exact look at what you said. Or hypocrite. Mona Phil. How do you feel? insulted? Right? So you don't call me? How dare you call me this? What did you see? What did I do? How do you know what's in my heart? We all say this, okay? Come to this, how youth related to blind eye or to monolithic follow
the signs of a hypocrite, three signs. And this is a hypocrite in character, not hypocrite indien not someone who doesn't believe in Allah. And he say I believe that's a different. This is in character. Aria to munafo.
The sign signs of offer, hypocrite is a three, write this down, and then look at it. You don't look at someone else. Number one, if I had difficut when he or she speaks, they lie.
Number two, either either.
When he makes a promise, he does not keep it. Where do we start?
Right, I'm coming. I'm not coming. I've come at seven I come at 10. Right. And either hasami have a job. When he gets upset with someone past the limit. Fragile means you pass the limit.
And instead of saying you know what, May Allah forgive you, you start saying that saying and saying. So these are three. In another Hadith, he said autobahn man couldn't have he he can own African Holly saw for characters. Whomsoever has them all, pure hypocrite. And if he has one, then he has one character.
Forcing had difficulty.
If he or she speaks, they lie.
So Pamela, it's something major, and it's a major sin, I'll cover and there's a beautiful book, small book. It's called major sins, it's about 72 major sins. One of them is alcohol. It's actually two of them. One is lying about Rasul Allah as AutoSum and the other one is lying in general.
Now I looked up this after this is I looked at the psychiatrists to look at this. Why do we lie? Why does human beings lie?
Why do we like talk to me? And then I'll share with you what I found. Why do we lie?
insecurity? So insecurity? Okay.
When I know I'm lying, not by mistake, I know I'm not saying the truth. So insecurity.
Share your information. That's a question reminds me at the end. I don't want to share information with people so how do I handle it? Because that always comes up remind me a dent. But this is not the reason this is one reason which is actually there is a three reasons it's okay to lie. But I'm talking about in general, why do we like insecurity is one what is the other one?
habit? Exactly. It's actually number five. It's habit. You know, how do you know how do I know it's a habit? When someone asked me why do you like What do I say? I don't know.
It just came out. Right? This is habit. So Pamela, when I was reading it, I was like, yeah, it becomes a habit. Because that's what our Swati thought was announcing don't fly. Because then person continuously will likely be called liar. So habit. Okay, that's not it yet, right to get out of trouble trying to get out of trouble apps
Typically, and I'll share with you at the end saying to say no more about this, trying to get to trouble or trying to get something, trying to get a status or something, I cannot get it. I'm trying to sell something.
How often is this? Especially if the seller starts to swear by Allah?
Right? And I always say, Don't swear, please don't swear, don't mention the name of Allah. I'll bite. Nobody. I mean it, because don't help people to lie.
You know what I'm saying? So this is a three, four
awards from the people to have a status, that status, I want to be like, we're on the gathering. And I want to be show off, I want to be better than others. So what do I do? I start picking up stories, like or exaggerate or making up stories, or I did this, and I did that, and I did not do it. Or my son did this, or my daughter did that or whatever. something related to me to look people says, oh, wow, Really?
Then you got it. So to get status, to get status in the security habit, to get the benefit or to push a home? I think
it will be lack of trust. I was coming to this and allow me to say this, because the question comes in is, why do I do all these? Because I have a problem with my relationship with Allah.
If I want to be dignified, who will give me the dignity Allah?
Who will give me the dignity Allah. So why are quiet
man can I read your laser printer I certainly lucky Jamia you whomsoever Listen, listen saltwater, Whosoever wants dignity. The owner of dignity is a law.
You want to be dignified? I am or you are insecure, I want to be secured. Who do I turn to?
I want to start as what do I do? Actually, one thing will give you status is being truthful. Because people will trust you.
And by the way, when we lie once or twice, you cannot cover it all the time. So five things remember, every time I am uttering something that I know it is not a truth, I need to remember these which one and turn to a one says your law by 101 give me dignity and insecurity or lost fuel. So basically, there are reasons we are or we lie is to get a start something in dunya something in this life. If I am thinking of life and our hero, and every time we come when death around us, our hero become much closer, right? Every time we pray janazah. What How do you feel? on that set? It's an I'll be the next one. It should be actually, this is how it should be when I go and visit the
graveyard. You have to say to yourself, one day I'm going to be there. So the more I think of there all these becomes smaller. So five reasons. Is it okay to lie in certain cases?
Let's see, let's see the scholars in this room. Yes or no? How many say yes. And one.
Life at number one, number one is a time of war,
a time of war, basically to push real evil. And number two, so you can put life and death under this, too. When we want to bring two people together.
Now, have I said that?
We're not going to abuse this.
You know how it is we'd like hamdulillah now I there is one I'm gonna use. The best way not to lie is to go around it. They call it a terrarium. It's a very common thing in this Deen. It's not flying. What does that mean? I say something. It has two meanings.
I mean something you understand that the other way around. I'll give you an example. So you know, Boubacar was working with our Swati Sala to center in a hostile place. And they didn't notice why the site was set up by the new site network. So they asked, Who is this man?
Here you go, who was asking me now I don't want to say it. Right somebody said it now. So here you go. If you say he's Muhammad Ali site or center, let's say now Swati psycho center would probably be hurt. If he said anybody else. Say now the worker and Allah protect him. He will be
So what did he say?
No, even nicer. He didn't say I don't know. He said that's a man who guides me through the road.
In the Arabic language he said hahaha Julia Dini era Sybil,
a man guides me to the path is realizing
Isn't he guide him to the path. But what I will do, and you will understand he is guiding him through the way, quote unquote GPS these days.
It's not a diplomat, diplomacy, it's basically saying the truth. And the person in front of you will understand it may be different than what you are. I'll give you another example. And this is not lying. This is out of adaboost, Allah Swati santosa. are saying also abubaker was asked, Is Swati Sato some older than you? or younger?
Now he say younger? How can you see yourself as AutoSum? younger than me?
Out of respect? Well, he is younger than him. So what did he say?
He said, he is older than me in status. And he was born after me.
Did you? Did you get the point? So the way you answer the way you answer, for example, I'll give you a very common question. You buy a house, and everybody's gonna smile.
And then you make her people come to your home, right? And some people will ask you how much you bought the house.
And you don't want to say that.
And actually, it's your right not to say it. And it's not really pleasant and nice, unless you're buying a house in that neighborhood. And you really want to know how much to know how much I'll pay. That's a different story. But just to know, I'm not gonna say it's not your business, because that's not politeness. And that's not my deal. But I don't want to answer.
So what should I do?
What do you answer? Well,
I bought it at the market price.
Absolutely, absolutely. You're not lining up and you bought at the market price, maybe higher market price, lower market price. So the point is, this is our way out for us in being allowed, that we should not we use it in order not to lie. But don't abuse this one also. Because this one, you know how we are we are weak human beings are weak panela. But I will say when I'm really in the corner, when I am pushed in the corner, and sometimes we are right. And if you don't want to say them, say to all my love, show me something, let me say something not lying. But I don't want to say this. And this teacher teaches this to your children. Because unfortunately, it's not a society. It's a
culture of flying everywhere. I'm not saying let's hear everywhere, teach them that this is absolutely wrong. You know the word haraam that we use right and left.
This is one of the things that you are and you should use the word wrong, it is wrong to lie period, except in the two things I told you about life or death, or in the case of war, or in the case of I'm bringing two people together. The husband wants to divorce his wife. Right? And she never takes good care of me. And she never praise me. And you look and says you know what? No, she does?
No, she does, I heard her praising you.
You are not saying the truth because you have not. But you are bringing a family together. So remember this lying is wrong is not allowed. And I kept saying this. And there is what is and I'll give you a hadith which is really amazing. And they put it in that chapter. A man came to Roswell, he sort of Sir, it was happy to teach us a lot of things, not only about Lyme, and he said My son has abdominal pain.
Okay, this is all of us. And he said give him honey.
Because Allah said in the Quran, he she found holiness Allah says in the Quran, honey is a cure.
Yeah, honey. The mind came back and says he still has to pee.
And he said, so he asked Allah give him honey. Want, came back. He still has been.
He said give him honey.
Third time came back and he said he still has that.
Look what he said. The rasa risotto said. He said, sadhak Allah, Allah is saying the truth. And I am going to say you're the belly of your son is not saying the truth.
Did you get the point so much believing that honey is a cure, that it is a cure. And if he's still saying that there is pain, then the belly he didn't say his line, he said his belly is not saying the truth. The man gave it to him fourth time, and the sun became
no lying, believing in what Allah says, believing in Matera, Swati software Salaam says, and I should not say anything but the truth. How did I we still have some time. So I'm going to share with you some stories, right? And this is very common. when the phone rings, and you don't want to answer and your child picked up the phone by mistake. Big problem. Right? Mom? Whoever is calling you?
What do you say? I'm not? I'm not here. And probably I'm hearing you. And you're saying I'm not here? Right? Tell him or tell her? I'm not there. I'm in the shower.
That's
I'm sorry, line. But I don't want to talk on the phone.
What should I say?
What is the messages that we have on our phones? The recorded ones? What does it say?
I am not available?
Right? If you put the recorded one, I am not available or I cannot come to the phone right now. What does that mean? I can doesn't mean all only physically. Could be emotional. It could be I'm not in the mood of talking on the phone. So a man knock the door on a very righteous man. Right? And he was in the house. But he did not want to see that person.
So he What did he say? So knocked on the door, open the door. And that man was there. But he didn't open the door. His helper open the door, came to him and says this man wants you? What did you say? Tell him look for him in the masjid.
Did you get it?
Tell him look for him in the masjid. Meaning
he's not in the house. He's He's not in the mud. He didn't say I'm not in the house. But I'm probably going to be more frequent in the masjid. Go and find me in the masjid. So find a way of going out. But definitely not lying. If I am between two choices, lying or saying something that I don't want to say which one I choose?
someone puts you in the corner, they really wanted the price of your house and says what is the market price? No, no, if I say don't know, online,
ask the realtor. No, I want you to tell let's put it this way. Exactly what my The reason I'm saying this is because if I am being put in the corner, I am going to say the truth.
That's what I wanted to get to. I will say the truth. And I'm going to turn to a lion I say Allah, I said it obeying you protect me.
You know, the reason you don't want to say because of whatever you protect, but don't lie, don't say I don't know. Because everybody will look at you as like, really, you buy a house and you don't know how much it is. So basically, this is what I was trying to focus lying is how long, there is nothing called why to blue or red or whatever color money it's wanting is like it's something absolutely condemned. And I can see this word in this deal in our D and actually even in society. And opposite is highly, highly virtuous. Still, even this day and age, when people when they write a recommendation letter, they say trustworthy.
For us physicians, physicians in the room, they say, Actually one day asked me and I had recently someone called me to give a recommendation about a creek. The answer the question was, if this was your family, will you send her? Will you send them to her?
And I said absolutely, yes. trustworthy. If I was sick, I'll go to her. So trustworthiness is still something highly virtuous, even in this day and age it's looked for so so you know, Omar said that this and this is actually answer somebody here and I told you all and he said
if saying the truth will put me in trouble. And look at next, he said between brackets and it was
Never do.
He said, If truthfulness will put me in trouble, and it will never do more beloved to me, than lying to save myself and between bracket, it will never do.
Lying may save me or you or ask for a short period of time, but at the end, we'll pay the price for it. So that's enough. Look at the next one.
A woman and this is a woman, actual
righteous man, they got into a quarrel about a piece of land they share. So look like they were neighbors, and there's a piece of land, she said, This is mine. This is mine. And the man said, It is my house. And then he stopped. And he said, he told her, I heard the roswaal he thought was Sarah, also other, take a piece of land that is not his own, from the other. Allah subhanho wa Taala will chain him 70 times on the Day of Judgment. And then he did the following. This is this is the lesson here. He turned to align. He said, y'all Allah, if she was lying, and this land is she took the land. And he turned to Allah says, y'all luck, she's long. And this land is not hers. Make her
blind.
Wait, wait, make her blind, and make her grave in that piece of land.
Okay, then, he says, later on, I saw her blind,
touching the wall to find her way. And as she was doing this, walking in that land, fell in a world and died in it.
So again, don't take it lightly. Conduct with a loss. Fantastic. Sometimes we get very upset. And we should when we know people are lying, and they take on an issue this in court, lawyers win stories about that, especially when it comes to divorce when it comes to money when it comes to inheritance, all this because it's things we love and like, see what he did leave it, take it and see what a lot. And he didn't say a lot. She's a liar. Look how he said, he said if she was lying, if could we throw what could I I could be wrong. And she could be if she was lying, make her blind.
And then another one he says
I never another righteous person said every time I do something by look and see. Is my speech the same as I am doing. Am I saying the same what I am doing? And I always say to my son, don't be a liar.
why I'm saying this, you tell your children. What do you want? If someone right What do you tell them? Don't do that. Whatever is that is,
as I'm saying this, what should I tell to myself?
Am I doing it and I always bring this example you see it all the time
because it's usually in the toughest time.
Right
last thing I want to ensure we can we'll have time for slaughter. What about joking?
joking joke in what are we joking? Like
the two different things
for a joke we make a lie.
Yes.
Maybe Maybe not everyone, but it is common out of joke to make people laugh. I say things not true. Right. And Swati sought for some This is a very famous line about him he looked at a woman
and this is when you study the laughing and the joking of roswaal the salt wassalam and he said, You will not get to Jenna.
And she starts crying. When I was highly sought for Santa you're not going to gender imagine this is you and me. Of course I'm going to be crying. And then he said not when he or she was an older lead. And he said not when you are in this age, you will be 33 engine
did he see?
And there's a hadith of roswaal he sought us and that's why I want to remind myself a new orbit and all of us and we'll end up with this he said now you're a man and Canada. You will not be a true believer to all believe I had diametrical Canada until so knew you and I will not be true believer unless you and I stay away leave completely lying when we are joking. And there's two things leave arguments when you are truth when you are right.
So you will not and I will not be true believer full Eman. Like I am happy with the way I am. Unless I am sure there's two things is not in me know aligning when I am joking. And no argumentation continuously, although I'm right. Because that's also very hard. I know I am right. And actually there's another heavy water Swati site or Sadam says I promise in the meaning is I promise the higher status of gentlemen, for the person who leaves joking do you leave lying in joking and in the middle of Jenga for someone who stops arguing although he or she is right.
I know I'm right. You know sometimes you get this is your specialty. It's your experience. It's your expertise and someone comes and argue with you and they are clueless right and they know you are wrong. You know how they have this and you know they are wrong and you say you know what? Allah knows who is the wrong and you leave look at your place in general.
The opposite one and this is one of the most serious one this is heavy from water water one of the most correct chain of holies of karate sorters and he said Mankato Vata Yamato Amida palatable what my other homeland No, the one who make lies against me intentionally. Let him Look at his seat and john. The reason I'm saying this is especially these days, and just as I left I had this question that's what came to my mind and we forward things.
V Sure. When you say this is a heavy Saraswati, salt or solar, this is a Hadeeth of raw Swati salt was because if it is not, I'm like,
and the best thing is don't unless you really make sure, let alone you say he said that's why you see almost all of us say, as he said, to make sure that what we are saying is close to what he said. So as we sum up here, ladies, let's make this non existing character in me, in my household, in my work at in the street, in my society, even if I am the only one I am the only one who says the truth one person gradually can change the others and don't do it for whatever the reason unless that to my last panel what Allah make us of those who he says in the horror idea you are living
in a lower corner Masada always
Either all who you who attend faith have or feel a lot conscious and be among those who are truthful. It double la Hakuna Masada. Now last part are the makers of those that was pantalla makers of those who listened to the words of admonition. Listen, pay attention, learn and practice Mr. Marijuana qualified to be honest and we listen and we follow the verse may last pantalla protect me and you and everyone, all our loved ones from any sign of not being truthful, or any sign of lying. Zach Malawians pelikulang more behind the shadow
stuff your coworker woody some a lot of sad
to see him. I think there's gifts what is no, I just yeah.
And there is the books also
that I'm running