Fatima Barkatulla – 70 Major Sins #22 – Sin 40 al-Mannan, Sin 41 Denying Predestiny, Sin 42 Eavesdropping
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The "70 major sense class" is expected to see major punishments and injuries in the coming year, including murder, attacks, and harms. The speakers emphasize the importance of avoiding major sins and the need for people to avoid them. They also discuss the concept of Sub and the importance of forgiveness and giving in various ways, including reminding people to give small things and not recalling things that have happened to others. The speakers stress the importance of belief in Qatar and avoiding denying others' actions and beliefs. They also discuss the negative impact of stress on children and the importance of avoiding over exaggeration and not being spied on by others.
AI: Summary ©
Okay, smilla Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah de assisters Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. And welcome to the 70 major sense class, where we are going through the 17 major sins mentioned in Kitab al Qaeda, by Imam a vehbi.
Rahim Allah, I'm just going to share my screen with you. So where were we last week?
we'd gotten locked to
what was the sin before this? The major sin before Ullman was
treachery.
Being treacherous towards alone, the man and his messenger being treacherous in general.
And now we're
up to a group of sins that I think
it's easy for us to belittle. And so you know, when you hear about major sins, like, murder, or
even Xena and things like that, right? Like, for some of us that might seem like So,
so far removed from our lives, right? Especially if you're like a practicing Muslim, you're all your friends are practicing your family's practicing,
you know, certain sins, they just seem very, like crimes that other people do, right, like, people far away.
But the next group of sins that are coming up. So personally be really surprised how common they are. In fact,
people do them casually. That's the really sad thing about the the next group of sense. So that's why I think we should really pay attention to these. And in a way that even more any pertinent to us in the sense that although none of us should feel
immune, even from the very greatest of the major sins, that seem, you know, we might think are very far away from our behavior will seem like very, very difficult for a person to get to that level, right? Where they would actually commit those types of major sins. None of us actually immune. You know, because somehow, I don't know how many times we hear about people who, they're kind of nice people, right? Like good Muslims practicing Muslims. And then something happens, and they go down this kind of pit, and they spiral their life spirals, and then
you hear about something that's happened or something that they've been involved in, and you think, how did they get from there to there, right? It's because shavon is off to us all the time, sisters, you know, Chopin is constantly in our area. He's constantly giving us suggestions, trying to encourage us towards evil.
And he knows with the believers, that he can't get the average believer to do a major sin very easily. And so he will entice the believers through smaller
crimes, right, smaller, kind of, what's the word transgressions? And once you start accepting those smaller transgressions,
you become desensitized, and then he entices you to the next step, then he entices you to the next step. So I don't want any of us to feel immune from any of the major sins.
But these ones that we're about to look at, unfortunately, they're ones that we see.
And that we also can fall into quite casually so let's,
let's become aware of them. So this major sin is aluminum. The person who reminds people of their charity.
So it means you do something nice for somebody. And when it when we say charity, it's not just
charity as in money. You know, it can be any favor. You do a favor for someone. That's an act of charity, right? islamically. So the car is an act of charity, any activity, any kind of act of any favor.
that you do is an act of charity. So
this
major sin basically means
either reminding people or mentioning and making it very kind of in their face that you you did something for them right? Or that you did an act of charity
or harming people after you've done them a favor
harming people after you've done them a favor. Allah Subhana Allah tells us in the Quran
in turtle Baccarat is three is that really talk about this? i levina yunfei Puna and wela home FISA de la he formula used to be Runa Falco, Manuela other lahoma, Jerome endora be him Well, I hope en la him Allah whom he has a known that those who spend their wealth in the way of Allah, and then do not follow up what they've spent with reminders or injury. Okay, so we said Didn't we that that's what my nan means reminding,
or mentioning that you did a favor when during the people after you've done them a favor.
It's a lie, saying those who spend their wealth in his way and then don't follow it up with reminders or injury will have their reward with the Lord. And there will be no fear concerning them, nor will they grieve.
And this kind of shows you how easy or normal is for people to follow up favors that they've done for others with
some kind of remark of showing off or, you know, maybe on a future occasion, they'll mentioned something like, remember last time I did that for you, or I've done so much for you. You know
what, especially like say, you've done someone a favor, and now you're in need of a favor. Right? It's very tempting, isn't it to say to that person? I did you a favor, right? Remember when I did that thing for you. But that spoils the sincerity of that deed
and harming the person afterwards this even worse, right? And then Allah says in the next
column, Maru from Amalfi rotten, Hiram min sadaqa, tinea to
other right, but that a good word? a kind word. And forgiveness is better than charity that is followed by home.
Right? And Allah is Allah who honey on haleem. Allah is
all sufficient. And he is forbearing. Right? So Pamela, Isn't that beautiful? You know, sometimes we think that we've done such something so big by giving some money, right? or giving, giving some actual tangible thing. But am I saying here, this actually better. And it's a type of sadaqa isn't it, to say a kind word to someone, and to be forgiving of people.
That's better than giving charity and then following it by something negative.
And Subhanallah, it really shows you that a kind word, and forgiving people's faults, they are amazing gifts that you can give to somebody. Just think about in your own life. The people who you meet, who they meet you with a smile, you know, they'll say something nice about you. Or they'll remind you of something positive.
If you make a mistake, they won't be they won't nitpick every little mistake that you make, you know, there's certain things I'll overlook about you certain annoying habits of yours, that they'll overlook right idiosyncrasies, those types of easygoing people.
They are so enjoyable to be around, right? They basically it's like they're being so benevolent and giving towards you by being forgiving, and kind. Right? And that's a huge gift. And so Pamela, this I have her and really shows you how important it is to have that that characteristic, right?
saying a kind word, forgiving people's faults.
You know, maybe we can write down that, you know, every day.
Is there a kind word you could say to somebody, maybe through text, or in your interactions with people? Is there a kind word you could say to them? Is there some kind of overlooking of their faults that you could do, you know, to bring to life this
this act of
charity that Allah is telling us about right?
And then Allah says, yeah you have levina Armin latuda pellucida corticon bill money will ever oh you have believed do not invalidate your charities with reminders or injury
as does one who spends his wealth only to be seen by the people can lovely young people, Marla Horry and nursey. What are you mean, we'll be lucky while you're Mila.
Just like the person who's basically only spending
as an act of showing off, right so that people will see him.
And he doesn't actually believe in Allah, He wants to reward from the people. He sees the people as his source of reward, their adulation, their praise. And then Allah says,
For my fellow hookah, my fairly soft one in LA he to rob be the parable, or the example
of that person, right, who basically gives charity and then follows up with
reminders or so reminding people about charity that they've given, or,
you know, harming them. Allah says they are like,
sufferance or fun here is like a boulder, like a massive Boulder, smooth boulder
that has like a layer of soil on it has a layer of soil on it. And then that soil has vegetation, right?
So from far away that Boulder, or that rock, with that thin layer of soil on it, with vegetation, it looks like it's green, right? It looks very lush, from far away. And a person might think, oh, wow, you know that that's,
like, very fertile, some kind of fertile ground.
But Allah says, For our Sahaba, who were billing for taraka, who sold them that
and then a
there's a downpour of rain. Okay.
And what happens, all of that thin layer of soil and vegetation just washes away, washes away. And all that's really left is rock.
So Allah is likening a person who does good,
gives charity and then follows up with harm, or follows up with reminders to this Boulder. That looks lush, it looks like they've done something amazing, right? So just like this boulder looks like it's got vegetation. But when the water pulls down on it, it all washes away. So by following up this sadaqa with harm or with reminders, you're washing away the good deeds or washing away any good that was in it.
And then Allah Subhana Allah says
la jacc de Runa Allah chez Makka Sabu, Allahu La Jolla del formel caffeine that they are unable to keep any reward in other words, of what they have earned. And Allah does not guide the disbelieving people Allah has equated it is a type of act of disbelief,
right? Because if you really want, if you really did it for the sake of Allah, you would not be following up with home, you would not be showing off about it, or reminding people of it.
Right? You did it for Allah. And I know it's actually very tempting, you know, especially like with family. I don't know if you've experienced this. But sometimes like say, say you're a person who does a lot of giving in the family. You're the one who invites a lot of people you do this or you do that you're right.
And then you see one of your siblings or somebody in the family doesn't really pull their weight much, right? It's really easy to
have a dig at them or make a comment, like, you know,
I you know, I always do everything or maybe not as blatant as that, but some kind of comment that kind of makes, just to make it known that you know, you feel like you do all the work in the family, or you're the one who's always doing the giving.
Now, why did you do that? Why do you need to do that? If you are the one who's always giving, and I mentioned this because I hear sisters, talk about this, you know, if you're the one who's always doing the giving, you're the one who's always doing the silicone rahem You're the one who
Always feeding people blah, blah, blah.
You're doing that for a lot, right? So why do you need to talk about it?
You know, if that person in front of you doesn't have the initiative to do that, if your other family members, they don't have that initiative, then you should realize that Allah has blessed you. Allah has blessed you to have the trophy, right? To be the one who's the giving one.
That's a blessing.
You know, and if Allah didn't give those people that the trophy and they haven't got the kind of, you know, some people they're not very emotionally intelligent, or they're not very conscious of these types of things.
then realize that a lot kind of Allah has blessed you by making you the one who's the giver.
If you're the giver, you're also going to be the one who will get the most reward right?
So panela So,
and this heavy, it's very scary.
Oh, Buddha said,
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam observed that there are three types of people to whom Allah will neither speak on the Day of Judgment, no, look at them, no purify them, and they will have a painful chastisement.
The Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam repeated it three times. of will, they're remarked, they are ruined. Who are they Oh, messenger of Allah. Upon this, the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said,
One who lets down his lower garments below his ankles, should say ankles, that's the wrong spelling.
alias out of arrogance, okay, so you know, people who drag their clothes out of arrogance,
one who boasts of his favors done to another, right, so this is a mannequin,
following up
charity with reminders, right? One who boasts of his favors done to another.
And by the way, it doesn't have to be that you boast to the person who you are. Or you remind the person who you gave to, right? It means charity that you then go around talking about to anyone.
And the third, a person who sells his goods sells things. So maybe they're a tradesman, or whatever, by taking a false oath. So they make all these like false promises. And, you know, a lie, he This is the best, blah, blah, blah, you know, the law, he this is say they, they, they take photos, and they
or they make promises in trying to sell goods
that they don't keep, right. panela. So,
again, it's so easy to fall into this specially in our times, right? People sometimes on social media, they're always talking about, you know, things that have happened to them. And they'll casually mention a favor they did to somebody will, they'll casually mentioned charity, or they'll film themselves giving charity, you know, they'll film themselves doing all sorts of good deeds. And of course, these things are very dangerous to a person's loss.
So the things you want to stay away from reminding people of favors that we've done for them in the past,
recounting anything charitable that we've done, or charity that we've given, right?
Just be aware that Allah knows, Allah saw it. You don't need to tell you to tell other people you know,
harming saying hurtful words. After giving charity, were doing a favor
especially to the person who you gave charity to. Right.
I'm
against and this is just to mention that this is all against the class, right? It's not the attitude of a believer. Very sorry, I need to get somebody to check the spelling on my stuff. should say believer.
It's against the floss right.
Okay, so major sin number 41.
Denial of the Divine Decree.
Okay. Duck avaible bill Qadri. So
we know that belief in Qatar is one of the pillars of Eman right.
Even Omar Abdullah bin llama are the line Who said that?
Well, he heard that they were people who are denying other
Right. And he said, If I meet these people, I will tell them that I have nothing to do with them. And they have nothing to do with me. By the one, by whom Abdullah bin Omar saw, if one of them had gold equivalent to Mount Hood and he spent it, Allah would not accept it from him unless he believed in other
things, then the narrator might have said that last bit, a narrator who narrated from even Homer,
but you can see the attitude of the of the Sahaba and early Muslims regarding people who denied other and there were some groups that basically started to deny other
you know how,
in the early centuries,
when, especially philosophy and Greek philosophy started entering into the
Muslim Ummah, and Muslims discovered and started reading and engaging with Greek philosophy.
It really affected a lot of Muslims, it really affected a lot of the intellectuals and scholars, and they started engaging with some of those questions that actually Muslims had not really been too worried about before, you know, they had been clear on before.
And then that gave rise to people really, sometimes, I would say over
analyzing over discussing certain topics, and then some kind of like, you know, we have groups who came along who said no, they, you know, you denied further, who denied a lost power over all things,
especially over human actions, right.
And then we also had counter ideologies or counter movements that actually denied human freewill completely. Right. And said that now everything that happens, we're forced, is forced.
Human beings don't have free will. Right?
So with regards to
the correct understanding, you know, of other
there are four aspects together that every Muslim should believe.
And those are number one, that a lot knows all things.
Our creator, he knows all things, Jen, in general terms and in detail, there's nothing in this universe that passes Allah by
without him knowing about it. Right?
So he has complete knowledge and complete.
You know, he's completely omnipotent. He has power and knowledge of all things, and over all things.
The second is belief that Allah has decreed all things in a low Alma for a long time afford is the preserve tablets. So we believe that
there are these preserved tablets, that Allah subhanaw taala asked
the pen to write upon everything that would happen until the day of judgment, okay, everything that would happen until the day of judgment. And this was 50,000 years. And when we say years, we don't mean Earth years, I mean, 50,000 years or periods of time, before he created the heavens and the earth. So before we even existed,
everything that would happen,
Allah ordered the pen to write it down on the preserved tablets. Which means that everything that's going to happen until the Day of Judgment is written.
It's recorded and written already.
Okay, and it's known already.
The third aspect is
belief that the will of Allah is irresistible. You can't escape the will of Allah, you can't escape. If Allah wants some something to happen, you cannot escape that thing.
And if Allah does not want something to happen, you will not be able to make that thing happen. Right? So his will is inescapable it should say I think, rather than irresistible, and his decree is comprehensive.
So nothing happens in this universe. Good or bad.
Bye.
By His will,
everything that happens, happens, the permission of Allah.
And by Allah's will.
The fourth aspect is belief that all that exists, was created by Allah
is the Creator of all beings and the creator of even of our attributes and actions. So when we want to do something,
the action and the ability to do the action is something that Allah gave us, right?
But at the same time, we believe that the individual has free will.
Okay, a person's will and ability do not operate outside the will a decree of Allah.
So Allah subhanaw taala is the one who gives the final. Okay, right, he's the one who allows those things to happen.
And nothing we do or want to do, can happen unless Allah allows it.
Allah is the one who has given us that ability and made us able to distinguish between good and evil, and make the choices that we make.
As Allah. Allah says, well, Maya, Tasha, una de la pena, Sha, Allah horrible al amin, and you cannot will unless it be that Allah wills the lord of Laila mean, right, there's nothing you can make happen unless Allah allows it.
So this interplay between
human beings having free will, okay, and our last kind of thought of being the ultimate one who decrees and that our will doesn't operate independently or outside of the will of and decree of Allah is not outside of Allah's will. And decree is, is a difficult concept for many people to get their heads around. And
to be honest, the exact nature of these things, right? The exact nature of the relationship between our freewill and a lot of other laws power over all things.
We don't really we don't know that. Human beings, I hate saying, I don't know. But actually, a lot of these things, especially when the deeper you dig, are matters of the vape matters of the unseen.
And so it's safe and better. To
stay to what Allah has stated and what the prophet SAW, Selim has stated, and not to
go so deeply into it, that it confuses you, or you know, that it causes you problems. Right, because we, as human beings were limited in our ability and our cognitive ability, and our,
even our senses, right? And our intelligence we are, we're limited.
And so for something that is limited to try to comprehend that which is infinite, you know, Allah subhanaw taala
is impossible. It's impossible to fully appreciate and comprehend.
And so that's why whatever last taught us and whatever the Messenger of Allah sallallahu Sallam has taught us, that's what we should hold on to. Right when it comes to beliefs regarding these things.
So
yeah, just to finish talking about whether belief in elkader is one of the six pillars of faith which were mentioned in you know, the famous Hadith where jabril la salon came and asked the Prophet sallallahu wasallam.
What is Islam? And then he asked, What is he man, when he said, What is Islam? The prophet SAW, Selim mentioned the five pillars, right? Then he said, What is he man?
And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, it is to believe in Allah, His angels, his books, his messengers, the last day, and to believe in the Divine Will and decree.
The cutter, both good and bad,
right, that Allah decrees everything Allah is in control, and he decrees everything.
Those who deny belief in other, there are certain sects in Islamic history that denied belief in other and one of them was the Zilla, right?
Or people call, you know, those who denied cover the other area, right? They maintain that Allah does not interfere in our good or evil actions at all. This is what they believed
that without complete responsibility and freedom, humans cannot justly be held accountable for their actions. This is what caused the kind of doubts right to come right that, well, if a loss of habitat is going to punish humans, for their actions,
that means that humans are completely responsible for their actions
and have complete freedom
and that Allah has no control over them.
Right?
Obviously, that's that's an extreme position.
That's a false dichotomy.
And then there was there were groups that did the opposite, and said, and they're known as the jabariya who believed that humans are forced,
controlled by predestination without having any choice or freewill at all. So everything you're doing is just like a robot
carrying out something that like a puppeteer is controlling you right? You're just a puppet is being controlled by someone else. And you have no choice or freewill. So these two positions are both extreme right? and Allison I will Gemma
are between those extremes, you know, neither denying other and saying that human beings are you know, have have complete freewill. And Allah does not interfere with their actions at all. And the other extreme, saying that humans are completely like puppets controlled by predestination by other.
between those two extremes are Allison and Gemma.
And you know, this beautiful, heavy, you know, is so, so beautiful, this part of this athlete that is famous, you know,
in the 40, had the gift of my mama no always mentioned as well.
If you hold on to this, especially this part of the Hadeeth,
you know, it can really save you from a lot of stress in your life,
that if the nations gathered together to benefit you, they could not benefit you unless Allah has decreed it for you. And if the nations gathered together to harm you, they could not harm you. unless Allah has decreed it for you. The pens have been lifted, and the pages have dried, it's already written, everything is written already. Everything is already known.
So you don't need to stress, okay? Don't have to stress so much. If somebody, for example, threatens you, or somebody makes an enemy of you,
or somebody says they're going to do something against you realize that they will never be able to harm you anyway, unless it was already written for you.
And don't put all your hopes into other people, when they say they're going to benefit you in some way. Don't put all your hopes in that job, or in that person or in that, you know, in your parents or anyone who says they're going to benefit you in any way. Because they will not be able to benefit you, except in something that law had already written for you. So you as a believer did not need to stress so much.
Pamela, you know, we don't realize that these beliefs that we have
this feeder, or these beliefs that we have *
it actually get gets rid of a lot of anxiety, and a lot of stress. I was having a deep discussion with a lady and Muslim lady who was asking me, we're just having a discussion about, you know, our children and as adults, like, what kind of field are they going to go into? Or what studies are they doing at uni? And, you know, and I was just mentioning casually that my son is doing a particular subject and
and she was saying, you know, do you just let your kids decide what they would like to do themselves?
And I said, Yeah, you know,
at the end of the day, they're going to have to live with her decision. So if they're not interested in a particular subject, why would I force them to do that, right? And this lady, this lady was discussing with me
Um, you know, while don't you kind of want to make your kids do your certain subjects so that they'll
go into a certain type of job and be able to earn a certain amount of money, etc, right? And don't feel stressed if they're taking a subject that isn't seen as being very lucrative, you know, like, history or no art or something like that, right.
And when we were discussing it, what became really clear, was actually, at the end of the day, the reason why, and she was trying to get to the bottom of why does it not stress me out, because she was from a culture where they get really stressed out, I think she's she was Chinese. And in her kind of cultural her family, they get really stressed out when it comes to, you know, making sure that the kids are a certain level, they go to certain schools, certain subjects, you know, achieving a certain they have tutors, they have all of that, right.
And she was wondering, like, Why doesn't it stress me out that my son is, for example, doing a subject that maybe is not seen as particularly lucrative as a, as a future career, right. And I said to her look, you know, at the end of the day,
if a child is good at something, if you're, if you're, if a person becomes good at something, they'll always be able to earn money, right, they'll always be able to earn money. So it's not something to be worried about. And then I actually have to explain to her, that you know, what, actually, what it is, is that we believe that, that wealth risk is something from God, something from Allah, and that, what's our success or failure, all of that is already written, you know, so yes, we do have to work hard, we do have to do our bit. But we don't need to stress about the results. Right? We don't have to stress about the results. Because the result is not in our hands,
you can work as hard as you want, you can, you know, go into whatever profession you think, is most lucrative. If Allah doesn't want you to be successful at that, if he doesn't want you to have a certain risk, you're not going to get that. Right. It's only if Allah wills that you will get that.
So by explaining to her our mindset as Muslims, she finally understood why we're not stressed out, or why I wasn't stressed out about it, right. SubhanAllah and it really made me think,
you know, we as Muslims Alhamdulillah, you know, for the beliefs that we have, and hamdulillah for the guidance that when I saw Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam brought to us from our Creator. Because if it wasn't for that, we would also be very, very stressed out.
And sometimes when we are very stressed out, we should actually reflect on that, you know, how connected are we to,
to those beliefs, right to the things that last kind of Allah taught us the Eman that we're meant to have.
And at times like that, we should remember how these like this, you know that if been hot, all the nations gathered together to benefit you, they couldn't benefit you.
Except in something that Allah has already written for you. And if the all the nations gathered together
to harm you, they couldn't harm you, unless Allah had already decreed it for you.
So in other words, make your focus Allah,
he's the one who's going to give you the success or the
failure or protect you from the failure. Right?
So I'm going to actually quite briefly do this one.
And this is a major sin that panela
you know,
oh, by the way, before we move on, you know, sometimes even Muslims, you do hear Muslim, especially like, at funerals, or I remember when somebody passed away and, you know, the,
some people who came, especially older generation, you know, and when they were trying to be, you know, they're feeling sad, they wanted to give condolences. Sometimes people say things about
that, that show that they have a deficiency or misunderstanding about whether, you know,
so they'll say something like, Oh, you know,
they were, that person was so young, and they've basically, you know, as if, as if there was something that could have happened differently, you know, they'll say something like, you know, if only x x, they had done x y Zed,
Right, as if that would have saved that person's life. Right? Or if only this or if only that. And I know that they mean well, but you can see that even in our community, people sometimes have a misunderstanding about other. And I don't realize that look, once somebody has passed away, right? That was written for them. That was 100% written for them. If they didn't die in that way, they would have died in another way.
Because that moment of death was written for them.
Right? So this kind of over exaggerated, you know, like, lamenting, lamenting that, Oh, if only he had not gone on that plane, or we've only done this over, you know, whatever it is, depending on how that person passed away.
It shows a deficiency in people's understanding of color. Yeah, of course, we're allowed to be sad. We're allowed to even cry when somebody passes away, right? Of course, there's a natural grief, that's all fine. But we have to be careful what we say. Be very careful what we say. It's very easy to say things that
are not things that a person who believes in a lot who believes in other properly would say, right?
Yeah, so just wanted to mention that. Now.
This major sin is one, again, that people do very casually.
Right? eavesdropping,
actually is basically, literally it's, you know, listening in on things that people want to keep secret.
So this 100% applies to written things as well, right? It's not just literally listening, you know, to a conversation that somebody is having that they didn't want you to know about, or that they were doing secretly right, or they were having privately.
It can also mean private messages that are being sent. Letters, emails, text messages, all of that, right?
Um,
what Allah Subhana Allah says in the Quran, do not spy do not spy on one another.
In Surah 49 I am number 12.
Right. And
one of the scholars says spying means prying into people's private affairs and listening secretly to what they say.
According to some commentators spying means investigating the faults of the Muslims and their private affairs.
Okay, and
and when almost pantalla says do not spy, it means none of you should seek out the faults of your brother when Allah has veiled him.
So panela
there's even this example here.
Even must not be alone, who was told by someone,
Al Walid Ibn octopus beard was dripping with wine.
Okay, he said, We are forbidden to spy. If anything visible appears to us, we will punish him for it. Okay. So do you see the attitude that I believe are supposed to have to other people's faults?
You know, this idea of that even sometimes non Muslims have, actually sometimes maybe Muslims also have this idea of what it is to be a Muslim society.
It's not about spying on people trying to find what sins they're doing, and then punishing them. That's that's not what it's about. Right? The norm should be and you know, we should learn about this for our children, for example, yeah, especially like when you have teenage kids, right? If you start spying on the right, and really like keeping tabs on every single thing that they're doing, they're speaking about, or they're mentioning when they're discussing something on social media or whatever. If you if you start doing that,
of course, you're going to find lots of faults, right? Because they're young, and they're just learning, right? They're learning how to be in the world. And that's not the attitude that I believe it's supposed to have with other believers. The same with if you are a spouse, you know, this idea that has become normal now that you can pick up your spouse's phone and go through their messages.
That's
First of all, it's it's so harmful.
Why do you want to do that?
I hear from sisters who are like, you know, I found my husband, you know, he's being very friendly towards some sister at work or some lady at work or in his text messages. Or, you know, a brother might might say, you know,
that he's found messages or he's read things that his wife has written. You know, she's nasty, she's mean to me at home, when she's talking to these people at work, or people that wherever, you know, outside the home, she's very polite, and very nice to them. And, you know, shavon can sow the seeds of jealousy and anger and whatever, right?
My question to those brothers and sisters who read each other's their spouses messages and emails, and you know, and sometimes they do it secretly. So it's a completely wrong Yani. That's how wrong we are,
you know, even with their consent, I would say don't do it.
But if it's without their consent, that's even worse. That's that's a major sin. Right? My question to them would be, why would you want to do that to yourself? Why would you want to burden yourself with that,
with the possible misunderstandings that can happen, from the messages that you read, with the possible kind of the jealousy that will be probably heightened? Because, you know, the spouse relationship is different? Isn't it to any other relationship? Maybe that conversation is just a normal interaction, you know, but for you, because you're the spouse, you'd, you'll be much more sensitive.
Right?
Why do you want to seek out those types of things?
You know, and I've had sisters on the phone to me crying, upset, saying, you know, I was looking through my husband's phone, and I, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, there's a sister, there's a girl or somebody at work, and he seems to be very overly friendly with them. And I confronted him. And he said, Well, why are you looking at my phone? And I said, Well, why can't I you know, he should have nothing to hide from me, right? You should have nothing to hide from me.
But, you know, I will always say to the sister,
okay, now that it's kind of come out, you can have a conversation with your husband about it, etc. But I will ask her, why did you look into his home?
Why are you trying to find something wrong?
Right?
Because look, I don't know about you sisters. But all of us can sometimes slip up a little bit, right? Like, in our interactions, or in some something that we're, you know, we might might slip up a little bit
and then we correct ourselves, right, we might become, inshallah mela protect us might become a little bit casual in a particular interaction, right? Obviously, these things are problematic in and of themselves, right? Like, having casual interactions with the opposite *, it inevitably leads to issues. But
all of us can make a mistake, right? Like, get a little bit too casual.
And then we might say, Okay, you know what, I'm getting a bit too casual, I'm gonna stop doing that.
Now you have the right to correct yourself and change yourself right? without feeling that every single message of yours every single mistake of yours is going to be
looked into or broadcast or right.
And that's another terrible thing that is becoming prevalent, right? Even amongst to art you see, even die is supposed to have some kind of knowledge doing this, right? Where they have some kind of spat with somebody and other Muslim.
Usually something to do with Islam or whatever, right? They haven't discussion. We even they have a private email group, or a private whatsapp group, and they're having scholarly discussions and sometimes it happens with people who are supposed to be students of knowledge.
And what do they do? That those messages supposed to be private between those people,
they find something wrong in what that person that scholar or that shear or that that he is saying, right? Something objectionable.
And instead of going like a man and being courageous, and having some dignity, and going and talking to that person and saying, look, can we talk about this, this is a major fault of yours or whatever and having a proper one to one and get discussing it. Right? Bear in mind, these discussions are private. what they'll do is they'll take screenshots
pan
take screenshots of people's private messages that they thought were just between them, right?
And then they will broadcast them all over the internet.
And they'll make YouTube videos about that person about that shift or about that person, right? And broadcast to the oma. That person's maybe faults, or maybe not even faults, maybe just a discussion that can easily be misunderstood.
So Pamela, and they cause fitna so much fitna, how much sin Do you think they're accumulating by doing that? You know, apart from the fact that they're, again, you know, doing this basically, right.
They're broadcasting something that was meant to be secret, and making it available for everyone.
Number one, number two, they're causing fitna something that they could have kept a lid on and sorted out and dealt with. They're just making a fitna in the oma to destroy somebody's reputation, blah, blah, blah.
How much sin Do you think they're going to accumulate from that? And they take it so lightly. In fact, they think they're doing the thing they're doing the almighty favor?
No, you're not doing people a favor by broadcasting faults.
Of course, if somebody needs to be brought to account for something, there are the proper channels for doing that. Okay. There are proper channels that people should follow to do that.
But this kind of casual,
taking screenshots of messages that you've had with somebody and then
putting them on the internet,
right? or reading people's messages, even for us, those of us who are just viewers, you know, sitting on the internet watching, and then you see somebody printing or publishing private messages, we shouldn't be reading those messages. Do you see that person is sinful for publishing those messages. But we would be sinful if we read those messages. Because we can see that those messages went to be private
is seeking out people's faults and secrets.
You run out of time.
So Pamela, so I can see there are no questions.
We'll carry on with listening to eavesdropping and what what that means, but also we're going to do next time, we're going to look at the topic of NEMA. Another very big topic, right? That is something easily that people fall into all the time. And you might find that, you know, in casual conversation, you or others fall into this sin of NEMA.
And it's something we've got to be very, very aware of and put a stop to in our community and you know, in our friendship circles, so just like my locker ancestors,
may Allah bless you. I'm sorry if there was a lot of noise in the background. I can't tell. But I could hear my son's making a racket upstairs.
Microphone didn't capture that in chat a lot. I'll see you next week. May Allah protect us from these major sins? May Allah give us hikma, you know, sometimes staying away from these things, digging into even our spouses, interactions and their you know, faults.
It brings us more pain brings us more harm. You know, May Allah give us hikma to understand that, right? That we make mistakes, our spouse might make some mistakes, casual mistakes, give each other a chance to fix fix up, right?
By having the sort of atmosphere of self improvement in the home, right, not by seeking each other's faults, exposing one another with private things, you know, but by being honest and realizing you know that you both want the same thing. And aiming towards the same thing does happen my Farren I'll leave you with that insha Allah Subhana Allah home ob handig
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