Fatima Barkatulla – 70 Major Sins #17 – Sin 29 – Suicide contd, Sin 30 – Habitual Lying

Fatima Barkatulla
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The importance of protecting one's life is discussed, including the suicide rate among Muslims and the need for police protection. The negative impact of alcoholism and mental health conditions is also discussed. The importance of protection for mental health and the potential consequences of alcohol consumption are emphasized. The speakers emphasize the need for forgiveness and avoiding negative comments to family members, while also acknowledging the importance of avoiding advertisements and highlighting major sin. The importance of trust and integrity is emphasized, along with the need to be sensitive to one's own behavior and standards.

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			Okay Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah the Sisters of salaam aleikum wa
rahmatullah wa barakato. And welcome to another class
		
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			in our series 70 major sins based on the book Kitab, Al khobar by imaam and gnabry.
		
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			Let me know what your thoughts are on that topic of that book that I was thinking of
		
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			writing in sha Allah, and anything else you think would be useful to add,
		
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			you know, to each of the major sins like any other angle or area
		
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			that would be relevant and useful for our times, that would be very good to know. So I'm going to
share my screen with you now.
		
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			We've started to speak about
		
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			the major sin,
		
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			which is taking one's own life, very
		
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			unpleasant topic to talk about. You know, in our times, it's very much related to, I mean, we're
living in the country where the suicide rate,
		
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			especially for young people is pretty high, you know, relatively.
		
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			It's not completely unheard of, in our community, Muslim community to hear of
		
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			unfortunately, of Muslims, also,
		
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			having committed suicide or taken their own life, I think it was only
		
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			a few weeks or
		
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			ago, or a few months, I think, a month or so that
		
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			suddenly, we heard of a,
		
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			of a teenage boy, Muslim teenage boy who took his own life and his parents found in his bedroom.
		
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			That is tragic. That's tragic, of course. And that's why this topic is a bit difficult to talk about
because,
		
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			you know, you don't want to talk about to in an in an insensitive way, right. But at the same time,
we have to be very clear. Okay. That as far as the dean is concerned,
		
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			taking one's own life is
		
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			a major sin.
		
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			Okay, and if you remember from last time,
		
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			what did we say? We said?
		
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			Yeah, so this was the major Saturday afternoon son of several person killing themselves and Allah
Subhana Allah unequivocally says in the Quran and do not kill yourselves.
		
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			Okay, and he's emphasizing that He is merciful.
		
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			Because ultimately taking his own life
		
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			indicates a person's loss of hope.
		
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			Loss of hope and the mercy of Allah.
		
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			Okay.
		
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			And we're supposed to protect our lives, we said that last time ropes was to protect our lives as
much as possible. In fact, to the to the extent that some of the rules of the Sharia can be any
changed the rulings because there could be a home to somebody's life. You know, I can't remember a
few years ago, there was this controversy in the news with Jehovah's Witnesses. You know, Jehovah's
Witnesses Christians, who were refusing to allow their child to have blood transfusion.
		
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			Okay, in hospital because they forgotten what exactly their belief is, but it's something to do with
		
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			not being allowed to take the blood I forgotten the reason forgotten the reason they've got some
doctrine that says that they're not allowed to take blood. Okay.
		
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			So, the government stepped in and overruled, overruled the parents, who were saying no, we don't
want our child who is basically dying, okay. We don't want our child to have a blood transfusion
because it's against our religion, okay. But government had to step in and take over and overrule
the parents and give the child a blood transfusion because
		
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			it couldn't just watch
		
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			Family due to religious reasons allow the child to die. Okay. And I remember there was, there was a
phone in about it on the radio and people were finding and, you know, all sorts of opinions and and
then there was the typical discussion, right of how religion is so backward and religion, religion,
what it does it causes people to kill their own children or harm their own children.
		
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			And I remember, I found in actually at the time, and I said to the presenter, happened to be Vanessa
feltz.
		
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			I said to her, because you know, there was all this negative talk about religion. I said, No, you
know,
		
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			God does not ask us to harm ourselves.
		
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			There's nothing in the religion of God, that tells us to harm ourselves. In fact,
		
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			even things that are forbidden, right, like pork, like alcohol, like anything, right? Anything that
is forbidden, if a person's life is going to be hard, in other words, they're gonna die.
		
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			Because, for example, they don't have any food or drink. And the only thing they have is that
available, it becomes now that haraam thing now becomes obligatory for them to consume in order,
just the extent to which I mean, just the amount that they need to save their life.
		
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			Why? Because the preservation of life is one of the
		
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			aims of the religion, the preservation of life, right. I think she was saying something about the
Jewish
		
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			tradition also having a similar thing, you know, I was telling her about the five maqasid of the
Sharia,
		
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			which we kind of mentioned last time, right? That the
		
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			overarching
		
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			objectives of the Sharia overarching objectives
		
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			that the scholars identified, and they look at the entirety of the Sharia, and they look at all of
the rulings, the pattern that they see in the things that the shadia is seeking to protect our Dean
protection of the dean
		
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			life, okay.
		
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			intellect, that right. progeny, muscle, and wealth,
		
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			man, right. And that's why for example, stealing is forbidden. Why because protection of wealth.
robot is forbidden protection of wealth.
		
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			Xena is forbidden protection of progeny, right?
		
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			person must know who with what their lineage is, human beings want to know, where their origins are,
who their father is, for example, right? protection of intellect. Alcohol is forbidden, right? To
preserve the intellect. Drugs are forbidden
		
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			protection of life.
		
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			Even the fact that we have capital punishment shadia has capital punishment for murder
		
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			is to protect life. You know, it seems seems like a contradiction there. It's not a contradiction.
		
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			You know, when Allah Subhana Allah makes the punishment for murder. execution, it means that that
becomes a deterrent for people, right?
		
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			Life is not something that is light and cheap anymore. Right? We live in a time when life is cheap.
		
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			Again, young people are killing one another. You know, we have knife crime in London.
		
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			Young people are killing other young people who don't care.
		
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			Because they know there's there's really not going to be that much of a punishment for it.
		
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			You know,
		
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			few years in prison,
		
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			who knows prison might even be better than the life that they're leading out there on the streets.
Right? Or in the council houses and the, you know, the places where they're living outside of
prison. There's no deterrent. There's no deterrent.
		
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			Protection of Dean.
		
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			So, one of the things you know, that we see in the Sharia that are there to protect DNA in terms of
		
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			the Salah in terms of,
		
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			you know, so many things
		
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			and that's and protection of Deen is obviously the most important, the most immoral
		
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			But the point I'm trying to make is that the Sharia does not
		
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			ever want us to take home our lives, you know.
		
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			And God would never put that on us.
		
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			These are some of the narrations we looked at last time, right about
		
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			the fact that it's a major sin. And the punishment for the person who kills themselves is that the
way that they killed themselves
		
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			will be repeated again and again and again for them.
		
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			Last have done to protect us.
		
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			But we also I think we highlighted that it's not, it doesn't take a person outside the fold of
Islam, right. So we shouldn't, we should still make go off of that person. If they were a believer,
if a Muslim, in other words,
		
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			takes their own life, like that young man
		
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			that I was talking about, right, that we heard about the teenage boy who he was an adult,
islamically an adult, I don't know the full details of his situation. But generally, when you hear
about something like that, you still make bar for that person, you know, you still make dinner for
the family, you still give them condolences and sympathy, you know,
		
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			it being a major sin doesn't mean that now that person is condemned, right? We hope for their
forgiveness, we hope for their forgiveness. But for that, for us to know, it is for us to know that
it is a major sin, and that we are the punishment for it is very severe in the next life.
		
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			And we said that it's because Allah kind of Allah is the one who gave us life. So he is the only one
who has the right to take it away. Or he has the right to sanction for it to be taken away. Right.
		
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			But it's not something that we have a right to unilaterally, you know, make a decision on? No.
		
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			And also, we said about, you know, loss of hope. That was one of the things we highlighted, right.
Loss of hope in Allah's mercy, lack of tawakkol, you know, is a deficiency in a person's human
right? It can be a deficiency in a person's emotion that leads to this.
		
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			But remember, we said that look, it doesn't mean that it's always because of that, and that we're
condemning people who, for example, have a mental health condition, right.
		
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			So this is what this slide is about, what about suicide by a person with a mental health condition?
Well, depending on the condition, you know, it may not be considered a major sin
		
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			for that person, right? For example, if they lost their mental capacity to reason, you know, the
scholars talk about that. Because we know that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is reported
to have said, the pen has been lifted from three, the pen meaning the pen that records deeds, right,
has been lifted from three. In other words, the these three categories of people, they're not going
to be accountable.
		
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			At that time, while they're in this state, the sleeper until he awakens, so while the person is
asleep,
		
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			if if he does anything, right, I don't know how maybe sleepwalking. I don't know
		
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			if a person is asleep.
		
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			Okay. So for example, if they're asleep, and they forgot to pray, right?
		
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			They, they didn't pray because they overslept. Okay?
		
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			Then they're not accountable for that. But as soon as they wake up, they're not accountable. Right?
So now as soon as you wake up, you realize that the Salah, you go and pray as soon as possible,
right? It doesn't mean you don't set an alarm, you know, you have to set an alarm. But the point is
that while that person is in a state of sleep, they can't be held accountable for something right?
		
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			A child until he reaches puberty, so a child girl a boy.
		
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			While they are under the age of puberty, or while they don't have the signs of puberty in their
body, they walk for the girl, that's menstruation for the boy, it could be
		
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			a *. It could be
		
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			you know, pubic hair, deepening of the voice and those you know the classic science of puberty
		
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			until that point,
		
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			The child is not accountable, right? They're not held accountable for their
		
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			sins
		
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			and the insane person until he comes to his senses. Right? So a person who loses their mind loses
their mental capacity
		
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			is also not accountable.
		
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			Okay? So that's why, you know, we have to be careful, we don't want to, again, if you hear about
somebody who is in this situation who's, for example, you hear that they've committed suicide, you
don't know the circumstances. So you know, just make go off with them. And you go to their janazah,
etc, you know.
		
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			And we talked about, you know, if a person is contemplating suicide, some of the things they need to
think about.
		
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			And we've covered that last time, so I don't really want to go over it again, please look at the
previous video.
		
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			So we still make Boff of that person's forgiveness, okay, it's not cool for
		
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			that takes a person outside of Islam, this person is still a believer, it's just
		
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			a major sin that they've committed, right. And the nature of the major sin is that they can't come
back. Right, they can't come back. That's the nature of that sin.
		
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			But
		
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			we shouldn't like say negative things to the relatives, you know, I mean, we hang stuff to be
sensitive to the relatives, there's no need to say, Oh, that was a major sin that that person
committed, you know, there's no need to like, say that to the relatives, because the relatives are
suffering at the end of the day, right? Like this young man who, who took his own life, his parents
did not have a clue that he was even suffering from bullying, or whatever it was that he was going
through. Right? They didn't know.
		
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			And in that, I think is a real wake up call for parents, for all of us, actually, that
		
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			do we know what's going on in the lives of our kids?
		
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			You know, because young people, they're still forming that human, their sense of who Allah is and
how to connect to Allah, and having to our call, and that they're Allah's mercy is there and you
know, that you need to have patience, and these are things that they're still getting to know about.
And if we haven't instilled that in them,
		
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			first of all, and second, secondly, if we're not even aware of what's going on in our young people's
lives, you know, if they're suffering, they can't even turn to us. What in the world is going on?
You know, we really need to ask ourselves that, like, what is going on our parents, allowing the
children to lead separate lives, in their bedrooms with their phones and their devices, and don't
know what's going on, you don't know that your child is being bullied, or you don't know that
they're suffering from something or what kind of websites are going on. And this is why I really
advocate that, you know, you don't allow your children to be hidden away in their rooms, with
		
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			devices. But that people if they are going to be on devices, first of all, time limited. block
certain types of websites, you know, you can do that there are settings you can set up when you're
setting up your internet, you can do that.
		
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			Be able to cut off their Wi Fi, if need be right.
		
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			And generally speaking, let them be in a public room in a room where everyone is when they are on
the internet. So you know what's going on? I know that's not what is possible. But, you know, you
hear so many stories of young people who've
		
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			gone off to Syria and
		
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			arranged all of that online.
		
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			Right? Through chats, chat rooms, and things like this.
		
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			Or, again, like this young man who is later on that they found out that he was being bullied online
or at school and he was talking about it, but he couldn't talk to his own parents about it.
		
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			Right, or I don't know exactly what happened. But you know, what it seemed.
		
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			We need to ask ourselves What's going on? You know, we need to be involved in our children's lives.
We need to know what's going on. And if somebody in our family, even not our children, our siblings,
our anyone, or friends expresses that they're suffering.
		
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			We got to try to find out for them.
		
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			You know,
		
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			Encourage them to seek help, but also help find help for them.
		
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			So, so Latin janazah still takes place for such a person. Okay.
		
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			However, some of the scholars say that the people have knowledge and like the LMR, they don't attend
the janazah of a person who took their own life.
		
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			Okay, and that is to send a message to the community
		
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			that this isn't acceptable, this isn't. But this is a major sin, right?
		
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			The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did not pray janazah over a person who
		
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			took their own life.
		
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			And this is why, you know, so he didn't prevent the Muslims from doing it. In fact, he told them to,
but he himself did not pray in that janazah.
		
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			Why? Because, you know, when the people of knowledge do something, it's a type of
		
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			It's a type of
		
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			endorsement. Right? It's an honor, isn't it, you're being honored by having people have knowledge,
		
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			the allama who are the heirs of the Prophet
		
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			having them present at a janazah. And because it's very important for this message to be sent out to
the community that this is not acceptable.
		
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			You know, that this isn't condoned by the Sharia at all.
		
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			This is why the people of knowledge, Allah do not pray the janazah over a person who took their own
life.
		
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			And I've written here, no need to mention it and tell others.
		
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			You know, it's not something to spread, really, it's not really something if you've if you know,
that it, that that's how the person died, that we need to really like advertise and
		
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			mention, you know,
		
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			because it's like any
		
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			negative end, right? or major sin. You don't want to tell people about it, you know, after the
person has died, a believer, and you we are hopeful that last 100, Allah forgives them, you know,
we're still hopeful that Allah will forgive them will make the offer them.
		
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			You know, so I think that's really important as well.
		
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			Because we know that Allah Subhana, Allah says that he forgives. So he doesn't forgive, that anyone
associates partners with him, right? doesn't forgive shared. But apart from any other sin, including
these major sins, all of these major sins we've mentioned so far, and the ones that we're going to
mention in the future.
		
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			if Allah wills he could forgive that person, either due to their own tober
		
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			or due to some deed that they did that he's so pleased with, right? We you know, we know the story
of the prostitute who was forgiven for she fed a, she gave water to a dog, right? Some deed that
Allah loved so much that He will forgive that person, or
		
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			perhaps due to outdoors, London's best. The point is that we don't condemn any person and we say
specifically about a specific person, that person is going to be punished. That person is going to
Hellfire, right, we don't say that about a specific person.
		
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			Even for non Muslims, you know, well say that about a specific person that you're going to, you're
condemned to this or that. We say that a person who commits this sin
		
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			you know,
		
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			the punishment for the sin is this.
		
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			But now to start talking specifics, that that's uncalled for, and also we don't have a right to do
that. Because we don't know what Allah subhanaw taala will decide about them, right ultimately.
		
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			So that's really important to note that every even major sin Allah subhanaw taala could forgive if
you want
		
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			okay.
		
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			Right.
		
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			Fell kvp urllib awkwardly, so lying in most of your speech,
		
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			that's what this means, right? I basically lying all the time lying a lot.
		
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			Okay, that's the next major sin.
		
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			And there's a number of
		
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			AI ads in the Quran about this, like, what's it on hover are suing and harass sooner those who lied
about the profits, right? They lie about the prophets Allah, Allah, whatever seller,
		
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			the deny him and
		
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			make up lies about him. And Allah Subhana Allah said,
		
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			in sort of Emraan if someone argues with you, I'm prophet over this meaning this message of yours,
after the knowledge that has come to you say to him Come, let us call our sons and your sons, our
women and your women, ourselves and yourselves, then let us pray and invoke the curse of Allah upon
the liars.
		
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			And at the end of this ayah, Allah Subhana, Allah says in Allah, Allah, the men who are mostly
fomka, Bab, Indeed Allah does not guide one who is a transgressor and a liar.
		
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			by lying, we know that one of the great qualities of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was
that he was truthful.
		
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			Even before he became a prophet, right, I saw the apple, I mean, he was a saw their color. I mean,
they knew that he was trustworthy, and he was truthful, they could keep their trust, they could keep
things with him.
		
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			And he would return it to them exactly as they gave it, their wealth even right.
		
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			He would not betray a person, if they told him a secret, for example,
		
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			when he was doing his dealings, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in the marketplace and the marketplace
is notorious, right for lying. And we know that even in our times, right marketing and selling
stuff, how much exaggeration takes place. It's a panela.
		
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			You know, I have this lady who, sometimes I buy things from, and I don't want to say that she's
lying. But
		
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			hey, you know, she's really clever, like the way she can sell stuff to you, you know,
		
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			when you walk in, she'll say something, for example, like, wow, you did great, you've lost weight.
		
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			Even if you haven't, even if you haven't lost any weight at all, she knows how to make you feel
really good about yourself, right? Oh, your skin is looking so good. Blah, blah, blah, right? And
then
		
00:28:07 --> 00:28:10
			now you're like, feeling really good about yourself.
		
00:28:11 --> 00:28:13
			she'll start selling stuff to you, you know,
		
00:28:14 --> 00:28:19
			I'm not saying that. That's the type of lying that's being mentioned here.
		
00:28:20 --> 00:28:26
			But it's quite funny that marketplaces and marketing and selling
		
00:28:27 --> 00:28:51
			brings out in people this kind of need to manipulate, you know. And, of course, it goes to the
extreme of being blatant, like, where people are selling things that have saying that they have
qualities they don't have, or they inflate prices and make things out to be way more expensive than
they really are, etc, etc, right?
		
00:28:54 --> 00:29:16
			Or they just blatantly lie in about the volume of something. You know, that's, that's the typical
thing that might have happened at the time of the profits or loss of them that people, you know,
they would hide a weight, for example, hide something on the scales, that would make the grain the
thing that you're weighing make it seem heavier, so more expensive, so you get more money, right?
		
00:29:18 --> 00:29:40
			There's the famous story at the time of Omar when he was k lift of him putting the message out,
right that people should not mix water with milk to sell it. Right because it had become like a
thing to do to mix milk with water and sell it as milk.
		
00:29:42 --> 00:29:49
			And obviously, that's the type of cheating this type of lying right deceiving deception and Omar bin
on
		
00:29:50 --> 00:29:52
			the line who had put this call out right.
		
00:29:53 --> 00:29:59
			And in the night, you must know this story in the middle of the night when he used to go on his
round, you know
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:05
			used to kind of go in disguise with his servant going around to the different
		
00:30:07 --> 00:30:23
			dwellings in Medina, just to hear and see what's going on is everyone are I? What kind of leader is
he you know, and who rise people like what are they suffering from? Do they have needs that he
doesn't know about? etc? Right.
		
00:30:24 --> 00:30:36
			panela he used to go around. And you know that story in the middle of the night he heard from one
house, he had a mother saying to her daughter,
		
00:30:38 --> 00:30:53
			mix milk and water for tomorrow for the marketplace. And the daughter said to her No, the halifa he
put a call out a middle mini and put a call out that we should not do this because it's deception.
Right?
		
00:30:54 --> 00:31:06
			And the mother said, Come on, he said, I mean, what mean is not here. I mean, what minion is not
here to see us. It's panela. And of course, he's outside listening.
		
00:31:08 --> 00:31:19
			And the daughter said, ameerul momineen may not be here. But a lot is here. A lot can hear us, you
know, a lot is present. He can see what we're doing.
		
00:31:20 --> 00:31:25
			So, you know, she was telling him that she fears a lot. Not really what we mean.
		
00:31:26 --> 00:31:31
			And Subhanallah almost been heard this.
		
00:31:33 --> 00:31:49
			He went back. He sent His servant The next day, actually, he gathered his sons. They say he gathered
his sons. And he said to them, Listen, if any of you wants a really good wife, okay, I came across
this young lady yesterday.
		
00:31:52 --> 00:32:14
			She'll make a great wife. You know, she's a woman of taqwa. And he went through two sons and one of
his sons Subhanallah actually wanted to get married. So he went and called for that young girl.
Okay. And she ended up getting married to the son
		
00:32:15 --> 00:32:15
			of oma.
		
00:32:17 --> 00:32:20
			And I believe that it was from her progeny.
		
00:32:22 --> 00:32:26
			And almost son, forgotten which of his sons it was
		
00:32:28 --> 00:32:29
			that
		
00:32:30 --> 00:32:37
			Omar bin Abdulaziz came later on this panel. So Pamela, see
		
00:32:39 --> 00:32:48
			a young girl, young ladies honesty, gave her a wonderful husband, you know, and progeny, Mashallah.
		
00:32:49 --> 00:32:50
			So,
		
00:32:51 --> 00:32:58
			all of these things are types of lying, right? And a person can become really habituated to lying.
		
00:33:00 --> 00:33:24
			There's so many heartbeats about lying. Abdullah bin Massoud reported that the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wasallam said truthfulness leads to righteousness and righteousness leads to paradise. A man
will keep speaking the truth and striving to speak the truth until he will be recorded with Allah as
a Siddique speaker of the truth
		
00:33:26 --> 00:33:29
			or a person of that level, you know that the level of the opinion
		
00:33:30 --> 00:33:35
			lying leads to wickedness and wickedness leads to the hellfire.
		
00:33:38 --> 00:33:46
			A man will keep telling lies and striving to tell lies until he is recorded with a lot as a liar. As
a liar. So
		
00:33:48 --> 00:33:48
			So Panama
		
00:33:52 --> 00:33:54
			just looking up something just a second.
		
00:33:58 --> 00:34:01
			Yeah. Okay. So
		
00:34:04 --> 00:34:18
			this Hadith, in Bukhari Muslim really emphasizes that, that you know, truthfulness leads to more
truthfulness and lying leads to more lying. I was reading an article, psychology psychology article,
		
00:34:19 --> 00:34:26
			just before this class, about lying and the effects that lying has on a person psychology. And,
		
00:34:28 --> 00:34:59
			you know, it said, apart from the ship, there are short term effects that lying as right things like
your heart rate goes up and you know, a person starts sweating and there's certain physical effects
that it's like the brain goes into this type of scared mode, right? And the reason for that is that
apparently, our bodies our brains are hardwired to want to have a good reputation. Believe it or
not, that's what the psychologists are saying.
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:40
			Our brains are hardwired to want to have a good reputation. And once the, you know the group, right?
And when we lie, we know that we're risking our reputation. We're risking being mistrusted by
people. And that's why it sets this kind of negative physical reaction, physiological reaction in us
panela. But the psychologist was saying that, and you know, those are the signs that lie detectors
usually pick up, right? heart rate, sweating, brain activity, stuff like that, right.
		
00:35:42 --> 00:36:03
			But he was saying that, in the long term, if you lie, the effects are actually less obvious. And
that is because people get used to lying, and they get habituated to lying to such an extent that
then their body stops having a reaction.
		
00:36:04 --> 00:36:18
			So that kind of shows you doesn't it that you don't want to get to that stage, you know, you don't
want to allow yourself to get into that state, where Subhanallah, you are so used to lying, it has
no, it doesn't even give you a guilty conscience.
		
00:36:19 --> 00:36:27
			Right. So it's really important not to allow yourself to fall into lying. And,
		
00:36:28 --> 00:36:36
			you know, I think one of the things that really helps with this, and you might think to yourself,
yeah, I'm on like, I don't lie. But
		
00:36:38 --> 00:36:45
			another type of lying, that I think we might do more easily, in our times,
		
00:36:46 --> 00:37:17
			is saying things that we don't actually believe, you know, saying things that we don't actually
believe because they just sound like the right thing to say, or they're politically correct. I'm not
saying we shouldn't be sensitive, okay, to people not saying that. But I'm saying for example,
sometimes you when you're in a group, you know, you get into this groupthink mentality, right? And
somebody might ask a question, and because
		
00:37:18 --> 00:37:21
			the norm or the group has
		
00:37:22 --> 00:37:30
			a type of way of being right, or there's a certain answer that that culture or that society or that
		
00:37:31 --> 00:37:47
			group of people find acceptable, we can find ourselves repeating that same statement. And deep down,
we know, we don't really believe that. We're just saying it, you know, we're just saying it, just to
kind of, I don't know,
		
00:37:49 --> 00:37:53
			to look good, right? Not to be embarrassed or something like that.
		
00:37:54 --> 00:37:57
			And we're not willing to say the actual truth.
		
00:37:58 --> 00:38:01
			So for example, and this isn't the only example. Okay, maybe.
		
00:38:02 --> 00:38:18
			But I think it's important. When people ask us, for example, you know, why, why do you wear hijab?
Right? Sometimes you hear sisters, and this, obviously, because they're trying to sound make it
sound good and palatable. Right. So things like,
		
00:38:20 --> 00:38:20
			Well, you know,
		
00:38:22 --> 00:38:24
			it's, it's my choice.
		
00:38:25 --> 00:38:26
			It's,
		
00:38:27 --> 00:38:29
			you know, it's something that
		
00:38:33 --> 00:38:39
			I believe is like, about women's rights, or it's, you know, it's a feminist
		
00:38:40 --> 00:38:43
			symbol, right? Like, I've heard people say stuff like that.
		
00:38:45 --> 00:38:57
			They won't just say, well, it's a command of God. You know, we believe that God has commanded us to
do this. I won't just say, you know, it's an obligation for Muslim women. Right?
		
00:38:58 --> 00:39:42
			Why? Because that sounds, you know, like, it's not going to be very palatable for people, right?
Even though it's the truth. So then we start using all these untrue reasonings, right? For things,
and then it comes to bite us back, because then the non lessons later they say, oh, is is sort of
about modesty. Is that all what it is a slight modesty. So Well, are you are you tried to say that
I'm not modest, you know, I'm not dressed like you. I'm not wearing a hijab. But so he's trying to
say I'm not modest. And then and then you have to do gymnastics, mental gymnastics and verbal
gymnastics in order to get out of that and say, Well, no, I didn't mean that. It's, it's not it's
		
00:39:42 --> 00:39:45
			not that you're not modest. It's just that, you know.
		
00:39:47 --> 00:39:59
			And then at the end, you have to just say, Well, it's because God said so. Right. We believe God
said so this is what God is what God commanded us with this is God's definition of
		
00:40:00 --> 00:40:03
			How a woman should dress in public for example, right.
		
00:40:04 --> 00:40:10
			So in order to avoid that we start playing games and saying things in half truths.
		
00:40:11 --> 00:40:28
			And it ends up backfiring. Right? So I'm not saying that we shouldn't be sensitive and we shouldn't
have hikma, of course, we should have hikma when we're talking, right, we should have wisdom. We're
talking and explaining things. But we don't have a right to sugarcoat and completely change
		
00:40:29 --> 00:40:37
			the meaning of things, just because it makes it more palatable to somebody, you know.
		
00:40:40 --> 00:40:42
			And what ends up happening is we,
		
00:40:43 --> 00:40:48
			we harm ourselves, we harm our cause we harm the message,
		
00:40:50 --> 00:40:53
			when we don't say it like it is, you know?
		
00:40:54 --> 00:40:55
			So
		
00:40:56 --> 00:41:19
			that's another type of lighting. And I think we can all become more sensitive to that. You know,
next time someone asks you a question or your opinion about something, ask yourself, Am I saying the
thing that I think I'm supposed to say? Or am I actually thinking this through and saying, what,
what the truth is, you know, what I really believe,
		
00:41:20 --> 00:41:21
			and what I really know to be true,
		
00:41:23 --> 00:41:35
			and become really sensitive to that. I'm telling you, it changes your life, it really changes your
life, because people respect you as well. And they know that you're authentic, you're an authentic
person.
		
00:41:36 --> 00:42:14
			And that if they ask you something, your word, your opinion, starts to count more. Right? If you're
always the sort of person who just says nice things to everyone, and, you know, someone asks you, do
you like this foodies? * yeah, it's lovely. Everything's lovely. And I don't respect your opinion
anymore. Because you're always happy about everything. Right. But if you're a little bit discerning
and say, Well, actually, I think that could do with this, or I think that would improve that. Say,
what you really think, of course with hikma, right? And if it's appropriate in that situation?
		
00:42:17 --> 00:42:23
			And you'll find that people start to take your word more seriously.
		
00:42:25 --> 00:42:35
			Right. You might get some people get who are a little bit reactive to what you say, right? But
overall, in the long term, you've spoken the truth.
		
00:42:37 --> 00:42:44
			And you won't be somebody who's just constantly deceiving themselves and others, right.
		
00:42:47 --> 00:42:50
			Sometimes people they, you know, they say something,
		
00:42:52 --> 00:43:14
			and they don't really believe it. And then later on, they get really upset like, Oh, you know, and
it's all because they, they didn't express themselves, they don't express what they actually
thought. They kept hiding it. And so people kept walking all over them, right. So it's important in
general, to become someone who really starts being sensitive about their speech.
		
00:43:16 --> 00:43:18
			Abu Raider, reported
		
00:43:19 --> 00:43:24
			that the alarm about the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said,
		
00:43:25 --> 00:43:33
			among the signs of a hypocrite, or munafo, or three, even if he fasts and prays and claims to be a
Muslim,
		
00:43:35 --> 00:43:39
			when he speaks, he lies. When he gives a promise, he breaks it.
		
00:43:40 --> 00:43:55
			And when he is trusted, he betrays. So Pamela, all of these three are types of lying, aren't they?
You give a promise. But you break the promise you. In other words, you go against your word.
		
00:43:57 --> 00:44:02
			Someone in trust, something to use, so you promise them that you're going to look after it, for
example.
		
00:44:04 --> 00:44:11
			And you betrayed them. When you speak, you lie. So all of these types of lying, and Subhanallah
		
00:44:12 --> 00:44:19
			it's very easy to have these traits, and these traits have become very common in our times, right?
Think about it.
		
00:44:22 --> 00:44:40
			Why is it? Yeah, this is a sad thing to say. But why is it that when you have a Muslim event, okay,
or somebody tells you that they're going to meet you x, x o'clock. Okay. Why is it that a lot of the
time Muslims will say,
		
00:44:41 --> 00:45:00
			Oh, you know, doesn't really mean 10 o'clock. I mean, you know, 10 o'clock, Muslim time is like 11
o'clock, right? Apparently. So panela like, that's terrible, right? That's a terrible, terrible
attitude to have and a terrible reputation for Muslims.
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:06
			Stop, right? If somebody says 10 o'clock, they don't really mean 10 o'clock, it's 11 o'clock, right?
		
00:45:08 --> 00:45:18
			Or you tell us that you take a book from somebody, you borrow a book and you say you'll give it back
on x date. And then that date goes by and you don't care. And you just just let it go.
		
00:45:20 --> 00:45:29
			Right until that person begs and chases after you and asked to put so much effort into getting it
back from you shouldn't be like that, right?
		
00:45:31 --> 00:45:37
			You tell somebody, someone tells you a secret tells you some confidential information.
		
00:45:38 --> 00:45:42
			And what do you do? You go and tell your spouse?
		
00:45:44 --> 00:45:55
			You go and tell somebody? Because it's like, really interesting, his skill set or whatever? And what
do you say at the beginning, when you're telling you're telling the person you say?
		
00:45:57 --> 00:45:58
			Don't tell anyone, okay.
		
00:46:00 --> 00:46:07
			And you think that that's okay, you think that makes it okay? When somebody expected you, to keep it
private?
		
00:46:08 --> 00:46:18
			You think it's okay for you to go to somebody else and say, Look, don't tell anyone again, I don't
think that person would like me telling you, but and then you tell it anyway. It's like,
		
00:46:19 --> 00:46:22
			that is betrayal of trust. That is a betrayal of trust.
		
00:46:26 --> 00:46:51
			I mean, there's so many examples we could give. And I think we need to become sensitive and start
thinking in our own lives, how we are betraying trusts. And especially, it's not just between
Muslims with anyone, right? But I mean, for some reason, we have low, even lower standards, when it
is between Muslims, why? Why shouldn't be like that your word is you. Your word is you.
		
00:46:53 --> 00:46:54
			And,
		
00:46:55 --> 00:47:06
			you know, the mall should be that when you say we're going to have a meeting at 10am on Monday
morning, which is actually something that I am, I have to do with my team.
		
00:47:09 --> 00:47:55
			That unless there's an emergency, okay? That meeting takes place, because you set it and you take
whatever means it takes which you whether it's putting it in a calendar, putting a tent, putting 10,
reminders, alarm clocks, whatever it takes, you do what it takes to make sure that you're going to
be there, you're going to be there 10am that morning. And if something happens, and you can't be
there, you make sure that you give plenty of notice. And you contact everyone that needs to know
before the meeting way before and you tell them that actually, you know, there's something that's
come up, blah, blah, blah, is there any possibility of us rescheduling? Whatever, right? But you do
		
00:47:55 --> 00:48:14
			that before you don't do it when you're late now. And time is running his time has gone into the you
know, time that you said you'd be there. And now you're like, oh, if you don't mind, could we start?
No, you should have said it before the meeting started before the time that you promised you'd be
there. Right.
		
00:48:16 --> 00:48:20
			So these are all the types of things we need to become really sensitive about sisters.
		
00:48:21 --> 00:48:26
			It's about having integrity. That's what it is, at the end of the day integrity.
		
00:48:31 --> 00:48:43
			In on the night journey, the Prophet sallallahu Sallam have got the numeration here, he saw a person
is very scary. So panela the description
		
00:48:48 --> 00:48:55
			we came to a man who was lying on his back and there was another man standing over him with an iron
hook.
		
00:48:57 --> 00:49:32
			He went to one side of his face and ripped open the side of his mouth until it reached the back of
his neck and then his nostril to the back of his neck and his eye to the back of his neck. Then he
moved to the other side and did the same thing as he had done to the first side. When he finished
that side, the first side had become whole again. Then he did the same thing all over again. And
this would continue for him until the day of rising so the profits are seldom saw a person being
punished in the Hellfire with
		
00:49:34 --> 00:49:38
			iron hooks with his flesh being torn off his face and
		
00:49:40 --> 00:49:48
			his sounds like his face being turned inside out basically and then coming back to being okay and
then the punishment being repeated and repeated.
		
00:49:49 --> 00:49:50
			And
		
00:49:52 --> 00:49:57
			you know when he asked about who all of the all the different people that he saw punished when it
came to this one
		
00:49:59 --> 00:49:59
			he was
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:18
			told, as for the man who came upon his sides of mouth, nostrils and eyes were torn off from the
front of the back. He is the symbol of a man who goes out of his house in the morning, and tell so
many lies that it spreads all over the world.
		
00:50:20 --> 00:50:20
			Hon Allah.
		
00:50:23 --> 00:50:31
			And, you know, that's not such an amazing thing anymore. The idea that a person tells lies that
spread all over the world.
		
00:50:33 --> 00:50:55
			Literally, we living in the age of the internet, where you could tweet something that is a lie. Or
you could post something a screenshot, you could create a screenshot, you could create some live
fake news, as Trump called it, right, and it will spread all over the world.
		
00:50:57 --> 00:51:01
			So panela, you could destroy somebody's reputation.
		
00:51:03 --> 00:51:12
			By just instigating a little rumor, by just retweeting something panela it's very, very scary, very
scary.
		
00:51:16 --> 00:51:20
			So for us to realize that integrity is
		
00:51:21 --> 00:51:34
			of paramount importance. You know, just hold yourself to account and say to yourself, you know what,
when I say something, it's going to happen, when I say something, it's gonna happen unless
		
00:51:35 --> 00:51:39
			something major happens, and I absolutely cannot do it.
		
00:51:40 --> 00:52:28
			You know, I remember, there used to be bollywood movies back in the day, where they would always
show the Muslim, you know, like the sky, who kept his word, you would go over a mountain, he would
go over, you go through *, to make it to a place that he promised that he would get to. And you
know, how bollywood movies there was like, exaggerate things, right? But they, they kind of show the
ideal version of things, right. And they would always show the Muslim Subhan Allah as the one who
kept their word. And, you know, like I said, would go through * in order to keep their word, they
would nearly kill themselves, but that their word would be upheld. That's the reputation that
		
00:52:28 --> 00:52:30
			Muslims had. No.
		
00:52:32 --> 00:52:33
			So panela.
		
00:52:35 --> 00:52:52
			So keeping our word keeping promises and promises doesn't just mean like when you say, well, law, he
doesn't just mean to say, well, Ah, hey, I'm going to do this. No, you shouldn't have to say, well,
like, when you say, I'm going to do this, that is already a premise. Right?
		
00:52:55 --> 00:53:04
			Don't say you're going to do something, if you're not going to be able to do it. It's better to say
no, that is to say, you know what, I can't guarantee I'll be able to do that.
		
00:53:06 --> 00:53:22
			No, just as I'm speaking, I'm remembering a deadline for an article that somebody had asked me to
write. So, you know, all of us have to work on this panel, I need to go contact that person who was
expecting something from me
		
00:53:24 --> 00:53:26
			and renegotiate a new deadline, right?
		
00:53:28 --> 00:53:48
			But you see how, maybe I've over committed, maybe I shouldn't have said yes to that thing. If I
wasn't 100%? Sure, I'd be able to do it. Right. And instead of giving that person false
expectations, I should tell them, You know what, I can't do it. Please find somebody else. Let me
help you find someone else cetera.
		
00:53:49 --> 00:53:51
			Beware of getting habituated to lying.
		
00:53:53 --> 00:53:59
			become very sensitive to fulfilling trusts if somebody has entrusted you with their secrets,
		
00:54:00 --> 00:54:08
			you know, kept you kept you in their confidence. Especially like as a wife, you know, your husband's
private information
		
00:54:09 --> 00:54:30
			or husband with his wife's privacy, shouldn't be going around telling people, your husband's
business, not even your family, not even his family, you know, should be something that you can keep
between yourselves unless there's a reasonably Unless, you know, you've allowed each other to talk
about a particular thing.
		
00:54:34 --> 00:54:43
			Another thing that is very emphasized is lying about dreams. You know, lying about dreams is even
grievous sin.
		
00:54:44 --> 00:54:51
			Why? Because people really believe in dreams. You know, if you say to somebody, I saw a dream that I
don't know that you
		
00:54:52 --> 00:55:00
			something bad happened to you, right? First of all, you shouldn't be telling people any bad dreams
anyway. If you ever have a bad dream, you're not supposed to repeat it and tell people about
		
00:55:01 --> 00:55:04
			But to lie about it is even worse.
		
00:55:06 --> 00:55:18
			So why because dreams, people feel that there's something from above, right? Something divine
something from Allah. And so if you say that you had a dream about something, people really take it
seriously.
		
00:55:22 --> 00:55:49
			So anyway, just to round off, there are different degrees of lying. Right? And with different levels
of sensor, for example, lying about the profits, loss of them lying about the dean buys a huge cent,
that's a grievous and then, you know, certain other types of lying, all right. So, although, in
general, consistent lying or lying a lot is a major sin.
		
00:55:52 --> 00:56:14
			There are different degrees, okay, some of the types of lying could be very, very severe since,
okay, so let's just all become people who start taking our word very seriously. Yeah. And start
practicing that and you'll see things will change, things will become better.
		
00:56:15 --> 00:56:19
			And people will really respect you and show our love for it.
		
00:56:21 --> 00:56:24
			So, the sisters just come along Heron.
		
00:56:26 --> 00:56:33
			And with that, I'm going to leave you and let me just quickly read some questions or comments.
		
00:56:35 --> 00:56:36
			On the law.
		
00:56:38 --> 00:56:41
			practical examples, people love those. Yes.
		
00:56:44 --> 00:56:48
			enjoy hearing the rulings in a more recent context. Yep.
		
00:56:49 --> 00:56:50
			You Yeah.
		
00:56:52 --> 00:57:31
			So, you know, each of us has a role to play our community instead of us looking at it and thinking,
How bad certain things are, how bad certain Sins of prevalence and sins have become. Let's become
sensitive about it in our own lives, and in our family's lives. And we will be able to change the
Alma family, by family, home by home individual by individual, you know, each of us matters. What we
do in our own lives matters and what our families do matters. So we focus on the circle of influence
that we have the people who we actually can directly influence
		
00:57:32 --> 00:58:02
			and ourselves and take responsibility for that. Then in sha Allah, this is how change comes, right?
So with that, inshallah, I'm gonna leave you and bid you farewell, dear sisters, does that allow
Ferran sinervo alikum Rahmatullahi wa barakato subhanak Allah homo Behanding shadow Allah Illa Illa
de esta firaga wa to be like, see you next time in sha Allah 6pm next Sunday. Solomonic