Bilal Philips – Sisters Questions & Answers Part 1
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The speakers discuss the importance of privacy in relationships and the need for privacy in home spaces. They stress the difficulty of avoiding certain behavior and the need for education and inspiring parents to be mindful of their behavior. They also discuss treatments for various health issues, including avoiding certain behavior and not letting children go to custody. The segment emphasizes the importance of dressing in a stylistically appropriate way and avoiding sexual harassment.
AI: Summary ©
I would avoid accepting such a gift
as a circumstance of
where
you're trying to get close to this person in order to give them some guidance, to clarify some things for them to bring them closer to Islam, correct some of their mistakes, then it may be better to accept this on the basis of facilitating. Because if you reject this, perhaps it would
make it difficult for you to try to communicate with them afterwards. But if it's a situation, where you know this is not the case, then where you are, you know the person is involved in, in how likely they are earning their money working at a bank or any of these types of situations where you're certain that they're getting portion of their wealth is coming from Haram, then it's better not to accept just on them, and of course, to tell them in a kind way, in a gentle way. You appreciate their thoughts, their concern for you. But, you know, based on the fact that the earnings are,
you know, in order to try to protect yourself and your home, you would avoid accepting such gifts. My husband wants me to wear the niqab. I'm not ready to take the steps. I do just with Jill Bob. And
my disobeying him take into consideration that the niqab is not that there is a difference of opinion on this issue. Please advise, advise, well,
if we take the position that the wearing of niqab is
recommended is commendable.
And the husband asked the wife to do something, which is fine as long
then technically speaking, she should obey Him.
My advice to the brother would be, you know, if your wife is not ready for it as yet, give her a chance to grow.
And that is a counter advice from the other side. But at the same times for the sisters. If the brother asks you to do something which is a part of Islam, which is acceptable in Islam,
then
you are supposed to comply with his wish.
Is it permissible for a woman to go out
without a Muslim for something important such as taking a child to school or a doctor, etc? Yes, this is permissible, what is not what where the issue of permissibility comes in it is really the area of travel, where a person is journey going on a journey,
not just moving about within the city, but going on a journey from that city to another city.
Those are the times when the issue of having a Muslim apprentice to the majority of scholars become
something where they have this weight also, as to whether it is possible.
at all, some scholars hold that is not possible if a woman is leaving the bounds of recipients in other areas, it is not permissible for her to travel that
was the majority of scholars hold that as long as that journey was not longer than a day and a night. It is permissible for her.
And in the case, where a woman for example, has no Muslim.
She has converted to Islam she has no Muslim,
then
for herself, to travel to seek knowledge is permissible because she is required islamically to gain knowledge. And she has no Muslim to accompany her to gain the knowledge that in that circumstance and there is no community to provide a means of getting that knowledge, then it will be permissible for her to travel to get that knowledge.
In animals besides pork slaughtered by the people that would be consumed by Muslims, there are a number of Muslim lady eating kosher meat with this excuse. It is kosher meat is considered allowed according to Islamic law.
And if a Christian also sacrifices an animal
and
the animal while it is alive, this niche is also classified as
you notice the issues that some people tried to raise
The Christians of today are not like the Christians of the time of the Prophet.
This is a weak argument because the basic deviation which took place in Christianity had already occurred. By the time the final revelation came in the seventh eighth century, it was already all there, the three dogs in one everything else is there.
Is it a sin to hate that your husband wants a second life? No.
How can one open their heart towards a polygamous relationship?
Keep in mind this sister thinks polygamy is okay. Even recommended, but with her husband, she's jealous.
Well,
one can,
one can ask the Lord to remove these feelings from the highest.
One can look at it as being a part of the test of this life.
And that if one is patience with this difficult,
that allow that individual for her patient, especially by looking at it as a means of
reward, look at sickness in our bagging patients with sickness, you know, that said that this is purification from
patients with a situation like that of polygamy, wherein one is jealous one
doesn't like it. But one is patience with this. I mean, this is a course where justice exists, not in circumstances of injustice, but where justice exists, that being patients will allow a reward that individual that much more
what is the proper way to treat your non Muslim neighbors
is a good test to lead them back.
To give them food, if you are having food, and some overtime, to develop some kind of positive relationship with them as a means of opening the door to give them some literature, or some page or something, to try to open the door to get some Islam across to them.
And this doesn't, treating non Muslims in a kind way doesn't
affect the principle of Allah and and Torah, where we love the believers and we hate the disbelievers and basic basic principles. Because what is not permissible is that we love the disbelievers over the very first
because there will be people who do good to us, who are kind to us, etc, we naturally will love and that natural love is
part and parcel of
what Allah has created us with. And there is no harm in that, as long as we don't allow that love to
cause us to take the disbelievers, as confident as close friends who we depend on instead of delivers
what are the dress requirements, woman in the home,
but it depends on what you mean is if you mean in the presence of non Muslims, then are in the presence of males who are non Muslims and non Muslim then reject requirements in the home is the same as adjust requirements in the streets.
In the case of
people who are from the Muslim, then the woman is allowed to relax for
covering to the points of what they consider to be the major parts of the hour. You know, what is below the neck.
What is above the knee, you know, for arms are exposed, you know below her knee is exposed. It's permissible.
As you just mentioned, there is an issue which has to do with the non Muslim women and out of Muslim women amongst non Muslim women. Scholars have differed on this issue. Some of you held that the woman Muslim woman should cover herself at least covering all of her body and then there's a range of other sexual but at least covering her here and not exposing any part of her body in front of a non Muslim woman as follows well that is permissible. The numbers the woman is like the mushrooms that she may expose as she exposes to the mushroom. And this opinion is expressed by she has been bad. And when he was asked this question himself when otherwise
And actually, this includes, for example, breastfeeding, that a woman may breastfeed in front of a non Muslim woman or as a woman, you know, which involves exposing our grass to them. But this is
the case of
breastfeeding women This is permissible,
permissible progressive potential when using music and singing, it has become very difficult to avoid these methods even in Islamic schools, while music is measured has to do with the forbidden instruments when the stringed instruments then it is forbidden. Anyhow.
If it is using a dumb, dumb like thing that you hit, to provide some wisdom as you are singing with them, then it is permissible
to declare bankruptcy on a student loan where they charge interest, called an asset to be charged without interest, the loan is for 11,000 we have to pay off 3000 we want to go for Hajj because we are so we can't until we are debt free
to declare bankruptcy on a student loan. So the point is the first one, they take a student loan, they have signed a contract saying that they will pay interest. Once you've signed that contract.
You are bound by your word, you know, it's not a question of we can say, well, we're dealing with non Muslims. And this is the only way and we will just you know renege when the time comes to pay no, because then what you have done is you've become like the Jews who make it permissible to take interest from non Jews, but not permissible amongst themselves. righteousness is righteousness. And there are no lines that we draw. So we are righteous to Muslims and unrighteous, to non Muslims.
So no one has a debt that has to be cleared one has to do so before making
now is that this is something that you're paying off on a monthly basis, say for example, over a year
that something was obligatory from you, at that moment that you owe 3000, that they need that 3000 then you should pay it within the next month, but you have it spread out over a period of time, then it is still possible for you to go to make hundreds if you know you have money that you will be able to pay on a monthly basis at companies that payment
plans for women to save during your pregnancy or delivery. It is common in our culture in Pakistan, for women to decide to marry and in order to make it as easy as this
decide
whether to make the job easier, not dissimilar question, we have no heavy performers to that effect. So anyone can claim that this will happen. But besides in core and during times of pregnancy, any portions of the grant any draws the process
has taught us in terms of physical ailments etc, utilize these drugs and Sharla with that, inshallah will make things easier for them. And if not, whatever difficulty they face, they should look at it as being two applications from things and be patient with it.
Can I Muslim wife requested a separate residence from her in laws, what rights that she has to privacy in her own husband's home, that she has the right to separate residence.
Ivan cannot make her live with her in laws unless she agrees. And even when they do so, within that home, there shouldn't be an area which is the wife's area, which she has control over. Not that she has to be functioning out of the same kitchen and other the same, you know bathroom areas as the rest of the family where public policies and problems are likely to arise. So this woman should have an area the house should be divisible in such a way that she will have her own area,
which is her own area of control.
There's a woman I know who converted to Islam and then got married to a Muslim but now the husband doesn't practice Islam and this woman going to be punished because she does not even pray and her husband doesn't even teach her very well. Knowledge is compulsory for her. She needs to learn to pray.
Whatever husband phase where he doesn't say it is still her responsibility.
She cannot stand before long the day of judgment and say I didn't know how to pay because my husband didn't know she has a responsibility to gain that knowledge herself.
And if she doesn't gain it, then she can be punished for not performing our prayers.
It is forbidden to hit young children in order to discipline them. No, although some scholars hold that she has not said that. Young Children should only be hit for fair because they had
As I mentioned, you teach your children saliva to age of seven and spank them for the age of 10. So that they should not be struck for any other reason is, is taken the literal
text of not that hitting from the head is made permissible, as he's taken it as being only in that context, whereas the majority of scholars will say that it is permissible to hit young children for discipline. But I would say that, that cheating should only take place when a person is not in a state of anger, that he thinks should really be for discipline, and not, you know, advancing our emotions out of anger, one is striking the child because then the child will not learn discipline, a child will only learn to avoid mother when she's angry,
until you have making headdresses up and wanted to know, if they have treatments for asthma, and diabetes, it's right for an ex husband to fight you in court for child custody with when she's doing the best she can for the child. So questions
in terms of treatments for asthma and diabetes. As far as I know, the treatment does exist there.
In the UAE, the medical facilities there are quite advanced
in terms of the husband fighting in the courts for custody of the child,
I want them to say, what is the condition here, this is you're saying she's doing the best you can for the child. But perhaps, that death
is not sufficient. If the child's needs are not being looked after properly, then if she will not give her give the child up to ask you to provide the necessary means for the child, then it will be illegitimate for him to seek to gain custody to the court. But if she is taking care of the child properly, and he is providing the maintenance issue for the child, then of course, it's not permissible for him to seek custody from her.
What is the best strategy?
Actually, what I'll do is as you know, as you're going through the questions, if somebody is the one who wrote the question, for example, and something is not clear from what I said, and they want to make a follow up, you can just raise your hand, and you can state what you'd like to follow up with. Go ahead.
You raise your voice.
This is Rob, if he is not providing maintenance, he has no rights. I mean, because if he were providing what he should be providing, then whatever the child needs would be fulfilled. So that would not be legitimate.
What is the best strategy to deal with a Muslim laughter taking our talking to
talking to them, showing them the truth from the Quran still is doing haram things. I wearing transparency job wearing perfume or makeup outside the home, taking consideration, the person who's your roommate, in close quarters with you. You shouldn't break ties with that person.
And finish answering the question. You shouldn't break ties with that person, you should still continue to advise the person. He wants to keep the door open because you never know when a good word from us affects that person.
Because our job fundamentally as the law says
that his responsibility is to guide is to convey the message in the malla file and
what is on the Prophet is valid, this is conveying the message and Allah is the one who would take people to account the account is with Allah. What happens, whether they're guided, whether they're not guided, this is left with a hard job is just to convey the message. And as long as people are willing to listen to that message, then we should continue to convey the message.
Somebody wanted to follow up on that note.
How does one dress in front of father in law considering we live in the same house?
Can you elaborate more in reference to the proper dress in front of either the
Leaving women heard sleeveless dresses, shirts etc, are not permissible in front of each other.
The general opinion is that it is permissible sleeveless dresses, shirts etc, in front of other women is permissible.
In the case of the father in law, because this has been lies a Muslim
for life,
father in lies a Muslim
for life,
one may
be in front of him covering the major part of our what is the and that one may not
be what we're talking about is that is like the minimum.
That is the minimum in some countries where people have limited amounts of clothing, etc, etc, then we know that at least that much is permissible for them. But, of course, for a woman to maintain, you know, a more complete covering, for example, just on the living altar here, or maybe parts of her arm something like this, this would be better. Because even though people may be considered Muslim, we do know that interest does take place, etc. So we don't want to wear anything, which would maybe encourage behavior, which is sinful.
But just to know what is actually required the basic requirements, this is legally the basic requirements, what you need to do if your husband does not want to make kids?
Well, again, one has to look at the situation, you know how bad the situation is, what
are you and your husband doing? Are you involved in establishing community involved in dialogue? You know, I assume in some schools, once all you can see that you are able to practice you know, a good deal of Islam, in such circumstances, then if he doesn't want to make his reference point is better for you to stay with him. And if it is a circumstance where you know, the family is falling apart, children are going out of Islam, you can hardly practice you're being put under a lot of pressure there. And you need to impress on him that need for hedra. My advice would be to talk to other brothers who may talk to this person, if he has the means to make his resume encourage him to do so.
And if at the end, you feel as though he doesn't want to change, you know, people are stressing him and you still want to accept it, and you care for your game. When you reach a stage where you fear for your dean remaining in a given circumstance, it is impermissible for you to seek an element to pull out of your marriage so that you can survive, you and your Islam can survive.
Somebody says something.
I know that gold is not Haram. But these were my father was wearing a gold ring. And the person that told her to remove it
does this naked
report is considering the various studies, we have to take all of them together. And the conclusion of the majority of scholars with regards to these on goals is that it is permissible for women, we can conclude from the Hadith of the Prophet, in which she seemed to disfavor wearing gold as a general recommendation and it would be better for women to avoid it.
But they in the end, the bottom line is that it is permissible for them.
With regards to the question of,
of oral *,
there are a number of early scholars who have
stated that this is permissible is is found in most of the stuff here is one of the most classical tasks
that it is permissible. Some of the scholars of this time who have addressed the issue have identified it as not being permissible.
What I would say is that
when you consider issues of harassment,
there's a general rule that you can use to determine what approach should you take to this particular thing.
Something which is from worship, from the acts of worship,
what are known as a badass then you should assume
That all such acts are forbidden unless the Prophet Muhammad was specifically made it permissible.
Whereas, the other category is what are known as the Muhammad Allah, these are social dealings which have to do with individual social relations, man man relations, male female relations, trade, the kind of dress you wear all these different types of things, this the basic rule in this is that it is all halau except that which prompts us whether one has specifically forbidden. So, if we look at the issue of oral *, we have to say this is from llama lab and not from the level of
So, for us to say it is haram, then it requires specific evidence.
And, really the effects are not specifically for entities and how people may judge or may conclude or may draw, you know,
answers or principles on the basis of general issues like for example, the issue of NASA during his magic. So, the place where you end comes from could be classified as a place of magetta. So, to put oneself in that situation where
you want to say, Well, this is something I've learned
something of course, but then again to say it is forbidden, again you run into a problem,
because
something which is maybe on your clothes may be considered to be not permissible, right, blood for example, it is not permissible for you to have it on your clothes, but for you to take a blood transfusion for out of needs, medical is one, so, this is permissible drinking blood, per se This is not permissible. In the case of urine, we know farmers are seldom prescribed for
the some people were sick in Medina jukin, camels urine along with milk.
So, you know, there are issues concerning urine that the Navy is on your clothes, you can see this as a joke of course, if you carry on your clothes, you should not pray and it you should remove it. But the other issues that come up which have to do with segments also doesn't have one issue concerning prayer, etc, etc. So, it's not sufficient and arguments to say on the basis of this we can say
where is the proof about it? Where does it say that nidhogg is recommended? What do you do if you believe that a person should wear this cover in a club and your husband says you can't, because he fears for your safety
in the US people react or can react very poorly to this.
The issue of,
of niqab
we know that this is the this is the way of the wives of the Prophet Muhammad, they cover themselves up completely. And we know that the generations about when the reverse of hijab came, how the women covered themselves with only one high was visible, these are all narrations relating to it. So, at minimum, we can say that it was it would be a recommended practice if it was practiced by the wives of the farmhouse or salon and the living women of Medina, you know many of them, then we can say on the on the basis of this that this is
preferable. But
the issue of it being compulsory. Of course, this is the issue, wherein scholars have different now where a woman feels that it is compulsory for her to cover her face, because she has seen the evidence wherever she concludes that it is compulsory. And her husband says she cannot
then
technically speaking, we'd have to say that she should cover her face, because she believes that this is compulsory, in which case for her to uncover face would be sinful. But what I would say to the sister, is that sense there is a difference of opinion on this issue, that there are well known scholars who hold that it is
not compulsory and others that is compulsory that
if your husband is requesting you something which among the scholars, well known scholars,
this is permissible, then again, it is preferable to comply with the wishes of your husband.
But before doing that, I would still say to advise or have some other brothers who could advise the sister, advise your husband to allow you to do so that they try to advise him in that way. But if he insists then
I would say personally, that it would be better for you to go along with your husband's position, knowing your heart, knowing that
this is what you prefer. And of course, Allah will reward you for your intention to do so. And at the same time for your intention to follow the instructions of your husband in an area, which
does
indicate some difference, where some leeway where a person may or may not do it. I took along when I was in disbelief, then became Muslim. And now I have to pay the loan. Am I accountable for that? No, you're not held to account in the sense that you're paying interest that you're held to account for that because this is before Islam.
My husband is for is it allowed for me to work? If I'm going to sell for? Someone told me it is?
Well,
of course,
what is forbidden to us is forbidden for us to sell.
And we should avoid workplaces where we're involved in selling what is
it what is the situation in a situation where this is the only means of providing for your family, then one may do so temporarily until one finds another option and one should be actively seeking another option.
If you're invited to a friend's house, and you feel that it will cause
more fitna by going and I know that if a Muslim invites you have to go
well, if you're not trying to avoid fitna
if you're trying to avoid fitna
then for you not to go because whenever we have something again, which is from the sun, now, something recommended of us. If that thing
may lead to a greater problem,
then we may give up that aspect of the sun that
this is a well known principle, that if in trying to do something which is not something compulsory, but something which is a good one is going to bring about a greater problem,
then it is better to avoid that small good
to prevent the bigger evil
sisters relaxing their job within the company of other Muslim women or another woman. Some women may be too talkative. And they talk about what they see and do in the company of other women. Of course, that possibility does exist.
But that becomes their sin.
That becomes their sin, a husband and wife
have relations. And when a woman sits with another woman, she may talk about it.
So because of the fact that women may talk about these things, should we say that women shouldn't sit together?
If the woman talks about what six days transpires in the bedroom, then she carries the sin of having done so.
Shouldn't Yes, that's what I'm saying is sinful, to go social carry the sin. But because this is a possibility, can we say that women shouldn't fit together? married women shouldn't sit together? Because it is possible that they may talk about what goes on in the bedroom? No, we cannot make that rule because of what may happen.
So in the same way, because if women when sitting together, relax their jobs, some women may talk about the beauty of some other women or whatever aspects of their themselves. This is not sufficient argument to say that women should maintain that job because other women need to know.
what one can do for oneself as one fear is that to oneself, then one can maintain one's job but what we're talking about is a principle for people in general. You know what you personally you as an individual may feel that you want to do you want to do more?
You want to maintain certain things that aren't required of you. This is permissible.
What should I do when I'm
left with my brother in law alone in the house with him? I don't like it.
But
the people I live with don't understand why it is wrong.
When you're left in the house alone with him, you try to avoid being in a room alone with him, then in the house alone with him is not in and of itself prohibited. If your husband from it says,
I actually, if your husband permits, for example, he knows somebody is coming, and he's not gonna be in the house. And he says, Please, when the person comes in, wants it in the front room, you stay in the other part of the house, this is permissible, this is the husband's permission. So a brother in law even though so, if he has, he can be in the house, but you avoid sitting in a room alone with him, which is the point at which fitness can occur. And you should insist that for example, he may not walk into parts of the house because he may take it upon himself. You may be in the kitchen, he wants to come in the kitchen and be there with you. In such circumstance, you should you know,
insist or instruct him that he should not do so or ask your husband's