Asim Khan – The Sunnah of speech

			In the hospital, Hadith the keytab Allah subhanahu wa ala or Hiral howdy howdy Muhammad sallallahu
alayhi wa salam are shallow or more in depth to her Akula desert in vida, Aquila medallion, Bala
Wakulla Bala tensioner, Amanda, my dearest brothers and sisters,
		

			one of the qualities of being a successful person in this life, and in the next is being an
effective communicator, having this ability to be able to articulate your thoughts and get the point
across.
		

			And this is something in fact, we don't really appreciate or think about, and I want you to imagine
Subhanallah of those people
		

			that are afflicted with a stroke.
		

			And after the stroke, though they survive, many of them lose the power of speech.
		

			How is life after that?
		

			That when they want to say something, they're not able to move their tongue and allow the other
person to understand how they are feeling?
		

			How would it be when you want to ask for something, and you are unable to communicate that intent?
May Allah Subhana Allah protect us. But this is the blessing that we often do not think about
speech, and more importantly, how to refine speech, so that it becomes more effective, makes you
more charismatic, and allows you to communicate not just what you want, but the message of the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.
		

			And if we turn to the prophets, we find that
		

			they were great speakers, people who are articulate and eloquent Allah subhanaw taala says, and so
Abraham, well, our cell number was sold in in BD Saturday Pomi Liuba Yun, Allahu Allah says, We
never sent any messenger, except that he came in the language of his people, meaning he spoke their
language, will you be an alarm so that he could clarify the message now want you to understand and
appreciate that a profit is coming with a message that will save someone's life literally. And if he
is unable to explain to them, how they must change their life, in order to gain salvation,
		

			he would fail that person. And that person if they misunderstood, they would fail.
		

			And they would be down to the hellfire.
		

			And so as a prophet of Allah, we find that they were graced with beautiful eloquent speech and our
prophets that Allahu Allah Salam was known to have joba me or cut him, which means that he could say
		

			quotes or phrases that were very concise yet extremely profound. sallallahu alayhi wa sallam for
example. He said, Look Me know mid to movement. These are just three words. A believer is a mirror
to his believer, Allahu Akbar. What does that mean?
		

			has so many meanings for example a mirror, it shows you your flaws, as well as your attractive
features. In the same way a believer a friend is supposed to be transparent. call you out when you
make mistakes but also praise you when you do something right. A mirror also is accurate.
		

			What it shows you of yourself is precise and accurate as sold so so to should a believer when they
speak or give advice be accurate in what they say in precise a mirror shows you what is around you
behind you.
		

			In a very similar way a friend should make you aware of that which is around your behind you that
you cannot see Subhanallah three words and yet so much meaning
		

			the promises and have also told us a lot mean that
		

			a person doesn't truly believe that you have very FEMA your head Bolinas you until he loves for his
brother why he loves for himself a golden principle
		

			that if you truly want to know your status in the sight of Allah, look to see how you treat the
believers in your life. If you love for them what you love for yourself. It shows that you are
personal Hi Eman. May Allah make us from such people along the mean? Again such a small, short
phrase concise, powerful and meaning.
		

			And he also said about the process of them his communication skills exceptional. It is said that
when people used to speak to him, he would turn and face them fully. And I want you to understand
and appreciate this when somebody comes to you from this
		

			aside and ask you a question, you may turn to look at them like this. But it's not the same as fully
turning to look at them. And so you are face to face with them. How does that impact on that person?
It makes them feel like this guy who asked a question.
		

			He values what I have to say he acknowledges me. He's listening to me, Subhan Allah.
		

			And he also said about the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
		

			Then he would make a person feel like they were the most special person in the world. Allahu Akbar.
		

			Allah of Laos around the Allahu turned around, he was one of the last people of Makkah to embrace
Islam before that, he made it his mission to try to undermine the Prophet sallallahu Arliss and he
was the one who went to Abyssinia to try and trick and the Joshi, the king to release the Muslims
who had migrated there so the Balkans could punish them.
		

			And yet after he became Muslim, though he is one of the last to become Muslim. He spent a few years
as a believer living in Medina with the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam and it is reported that he
asked the process Salam Yara Sula, who do you love the most?
		

			fully expecting that the prophets of Allah who lives some would say, average is you?
		

			But the person who said no, it is Alisha, Robbie, Allah with Anna Anna. And then Amber, Amber asked,
and who then after that, and he said it is the father of Robocop.
		

			And then what about after that? Is that then it is over.
		

			And I haven't said I felt shy, to continue to ask, because my phone my name would never come. But
the point here is that he believed that the prophets of Allah who are there were some loved him the
most. Why, because of how he communicated with him when he was speak to him, and he would give him
his undivided attention.
		

			And he will listen to him and talk to him as though he valued him so much so that he felt that
special. This is how the prophets of Allah sort of used to communicate. And this is a lesson for us
today, in self help, they talk about being a better listener, they talk about having active
listening being an active listener.
		

			And this is very similar to what we are talking about from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu ALA.
So they say that listening is of levels.
		

			The lowest form of listening, they say, is when you're waiting to speak.
		

			That's when you're basically in an argument. And the person is talking. And you're thinking, Okay,
hurry up, hurry, hurry up, as soon as they suppose you jump in. You haven't heard a word of what
they said. In fact, you don't care what they said, just want to get your word in SubhanAllah. This
is the lowest level of listening. The highest they say is when you are empathetic towards the other
person when you are listening, and trying to figure out where are they coming from? What is their
concern? What is the intent behind what they are saying.
		

			And the irony is that sometimes you don't listen. Because you feel as though if you spend time
listening, you will have to spend more time, you will waste time you say to yourself, but what
happens when you don't listen carefully, miscommunication happens, misunderstanding happens. And
that is when problems start which take longer to resolve. And had you just listened carefully to
that person, Subhan Allah.
		

			And then you responded.
		

			If you think about bad communication, what that leads to, you'll find that it can be very, very
disastrous. One of the consequences of being a poor communicator is that it can create friction in
your life, maybe between friends, I'll give you an example.
		

			Imagine you lent someone money, maybe a friend, a good friend of yours. And as you lend them the
money, you said, pay me back whenever you can. No worries, as many people say, but you didn't really
mean that.
		

			That wasn't really, truly how you felt that they could pay you back 10 years down the line. But you
said it anyway.
		

			out of politeness, maybe. But then when that friend starts to
		

			prolong
		

			that loan, and starts to wait and wait and wait, and you're thinking, Oh, hang on over. What is this
guy gonna pay me back? Then you start to have friction, that you don't want to speak to them
properly anymore. Then you start having bad thoughts. Look, he's going on holiday. Maybe that's the
money I gave him he's going on holiday with.
		

			And then the relationship starts to deteriorate. If you just rewind
		

			to that mobile, you said broad payment back whenever you kind of said, Listen, I'm easy, so long as
you pay back within one year. I'm okay. How much
		

			headache would have saved you that may have saved the friendship itself. How many people Subhanallah
break relationships because of money?
		

			And how many times that money problem was actually a communication problem.
		

			Think about inheritance. The father, he didn't make it clear, how much should go to who.
		

			Now, even though the shears have already been divided according to Sharia, maybe a particular item
was supposed to go to a particular person.
		

			And had the father just said to his sons and his daughters, look, this is one thing, I would like to
go to this person. Are you all okay with that? And if they said, so long, if they said, Yes, it's
fine, so long as the value of it doesn't overstep the share. I'm happy with that. In fact, they
could have even said, Father, you want to give this person this house? And this is more than what
you're going to give us. But we are happy with that. Even that Islamically is acceptable, because it
is their right that they are foregoing. But because the father didn't have that conversation, and he
didn't communicate properly. When he passes away, the brothers start fighting and bickering. I said
		

			no, he told me this. The other says no, it is anything like that. And then what happens? It gets
messy.
		

			And then the relationships break down Subhanallah what a disaster all because of poor communication.
So what are the things we should get better at
		

			is being better listeners, that when somebody talks to us, we follow the Sunnah and we face them
fully.
		

			And we pay attention to what they are saying. And we wonder where is this person coming from?
		

			And then we respond. And this is part of active listening. We ask Allah subhanaw taala to improve us
in our communication skills, and allow us to follow the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam, a full body hello sir for Allah and He will accompany so sweet for Sofitel in the whole
world before Rahim.
		

			Smilla Rahmanir Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Shafi lambiel mousseline
Amina Muhammad Anwar early was that we had married a mother.
		

			A second tip to being a better communicator, is to have good assumptions of the person you are
talking to.
		

			There was an interesting story from the life of the prophet Sallallahu, Allah sent me sent a
companion, Allah leads to go to a faraway tribe who had recently converted outside of Medina and
collect zakat.
		

			Now this first one, he went the automation,
		

			he was going to receive the money from these people. And when he arrived at the outskirts of that
tribes territory, he saw that they had already come out and they are walking towards him.
		

			Now the reason they were walking towards him, was to greet him, to meet him and give him Salam. But
when he saw them coming out, he thought, they're coming to kill me. They don't want to pay this
ticket. These people have turned against the prophets, Allah, sir. And so what did he do? He turned
his horse around and he went back to Medina. And he said, Yeah, rasool Allah, I think they have
either apostate or they are refusing to give this account. Now look at this, that is basically a
signal for war. And in that moment, the Prophet salallahu Alaihe salam to make a decision, what do I
do?
		

			Should I send out the army to go and teach them a lesson to collect that cigar by force? No, he sent
another companion.
		

			And he said, go and investigate. So Holly leads around the alarms and I was sent out. And what do
you do he count somewhere outside of that territory? And in the night time, at fertile time, he
would go and he would try and eavesdrop what is happening at first of time. And he heard that
		

			he heard the Avada Fajr time and he went back to the process and said jasola I heard the Adana for
the time they are still Muslim
		

			and so and I was revealed in the Quran yeah you were living in India and comfortable Minerva In
fact, every year No.
		

			Oh believers, evil person comes in in the IS is a wicked person comes to you with a piece of news,
verify it, and to Cebu calm and be Johanna unless you go ahead and damage a people out of ignorance.
Now, in that narration, when the promises seldom heard what Khalid said about them still being
Muslim. He said something beautiful, he said, an hour or two
		

			I mean, Allah will Angela to misshapen he said, deliberation is from Allah. And haste is from
shaitan SubhanAllah. And this is a timeless lesson when it become when it comes to being a good
communicator, that when somebody speaks to you, maybe somebody upsets you or annoys you, you first
tell yourself, you know what, I'm not going to react out of impulse or emotion. How many times? Do
you land yourself in trouble? Because you reacted out of haste. You spoke out of emotion, and then
you regret what you said, SubhanAllah. But the problem with words is that they are like a sword,
they can cut someone. And that cut can be permanent. And if it's your wife, or your husband, or your
		

			children, that could be a trauma that they never get over. And all the while you're like, you know
what, subhanAllah if only I had just waited a moment, for a better time to speak about the issue. It
would have saved me so much trouble that Allah grant is understanding.
		

			The last advice I would give myself and to all of you
		

			is that the Prophet salallahu alayhi salam, he used to practice silence. And this is something that
many of us do not do anymore. And you might be thinking just about your speech. Think about your
activities online. How many times you comment, how many times you post all of that is part of your
speech.
		

			Now listen to what the Prophet said I sort of said, he said, When Kara you may know Biller, he will
your mill, whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, failure to hyaluron only speak good or remain
silent. That is the principle that you follow that before you open your mouth, you ask yourself a
question. And the question is, is what I'm going to say? Good, beneficial, valuable, noble, pleasing
to Allah? And if the answer is no, what should you do? Be silent? And this will save you so much
trouble in life. And this will save you from the fire of Jahannam Subhan Allah because one of the if
not the mother of all sins is the tongue.
		

			Think about that. How many times does your speech lead you to say something haram? Gossiping,
backbiting, lying? Deceiving, all of this comes from where the tongue? And how do you say to
yourself, you know what I'm going to think before I speak? Is it good?
		

			Or should I remain silent? How do you remain silent all those times of how to lock
		

			the record of sins would be drastically reduced. We ask Allah subhanaw taala to allow us to be
mindful of our speech, and to forgive us for the slips of our tongue along mean and to allow us to
be better communicators allow me to volum Nan Posada while Dr. Phil and
		

			then Hakuna middle hostellerie Rahman Allah to Zulu when I've added Hadith and I will have it Allah
Milligan Kurama in the cultural hub of Jena dunya Hassan or Phil Filati Hassan Joaquin Agha now why
are people so?
		

			Allahu Akbar
		

			Allah
		

			as I knew, I never have met them Rasul Allah