Ali Hammuda – Do This in Your Relationships

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			shuffled wondering what we're going to do today yeah.
		

			Just here there's some leaflets. Yes. There's an angling fishing area around here. Yeah, we've been
fishing before never never been fishing. I love fishing. Yeah. And was thinking you can go fishing
have you? I mean, I'm assuming you just get some beans.
		

			Have a look in the fridge
		

			I'm looking for live here because you don't live be I've found that usually is much more effective
fish bite that module. So I'm thinking of frogs. Frogs. Yeah, that's bait. Yeah. Really effective. I
mean, the pretty things
		

			are supposed to kill frogs. Mostly because they say you should look in the Fox Valley kids. They
have their position. Yeah. jority they don't like wow. knew that. Okay.
		

			She's interesting chef. This story. Actually, I mentioned about frogs. My uncle once told me a
story.
		

			I know it's silly. But it was really amusing. I've just come to
		

			know these frogs are going through a forest once you know, just jumping all over. It's
		

			just plain wrong. And they didn't realize what they're playing. There was like a deep pit nearby.
		

			Jumping around messing about a couple of them fell into the pit. And it's so deep, they couldn't
jump back out again. And they were scrambling and jumping, getting frustrated, panicking. They
couldn't get out. Their friends came to the edge carefully and peered into the pitch and they said
		

			that's not looking good for you guys. This is too deep. You're never gonna go. Unless it just wasn't
give up. No way. No one can jump out. It's not you little frogs. Yeah. And one other one of the
frogs heard what they said. He got so disheartened. That's it. It's over for me. I'm never going to
go.
		

			And he just basically led backwards.
		

			Waiting for the guy. Yeah.
		

			But the other frog who was with him? Yeah. Despite what his friends were saying, or his predicament.
		

			He was just getting mosey on. He was jumping more and he was trying harder. And he was keeping going
and I'm gonna get off here. And they were looking down and St. Lucie doing because there's no point
there's no point and there's no shouting down, give up. You're wasting your energy. But the he had
this zeal inside of him. And he one point crouch down, got ready. And then he thrust himself up. And
somehow he was able to get the edge of the pit and scrambled was way out.
		

			Approximately, wow, what happened there? Yeah, I mean, what made you keep on going? And you're
looking at them. He's looking a bit confused views. And then he started smiling. And you go, thank
you guys. If it wasn't for you? Yeah, I would have
		

			I would have given up. I'll give it up. And they are looking confused. telling you to give up and
he's going, sorry.
		

			I'm deaf. I can't actually hear what you're saying. So happy that you stayed there looking at me and
helping encouraged me to get out. So he misunderstood their discouragement or encouragement. Yeah,
he thought they were saying good words to you. That was the funny thing.
		

			Okay.
		

			Apart from the fact that the following is supposed to be that
		

			eloquence. Pick the story apart is obviously told to kids and so forth. Yeah. And no, I mean, it's
okay. I mean, we have examples of the principal and action can be no like he did say, Well, only
Nursey personnel speak to people with good words.
		

			And what's interesting Subhanallah is that the Arabic word that was used for good in this area is
Hausner. So the idea translates as speak to people good words. What is even more interesting is that
there's another citation, Hamza Kisatchie, that they recite this idea as Hashanah. So there's a
small variation in Arabic speak to people with goodness, that's how it translates now. So speak to
people with good words versus speak to people with goodness, you put those two together. So the
first presentation describes what should be said content. Secondary citation describes how it should
be set manner. I'm sure you've heard of the idiom of Sticks and stones may hurt my bones but words
		

			will never break me. That kind of goes against it. It does. I don't think it's accurate. words they
do cause so much pain, you know, immense pain, and we know this through experiences of life. We know
this through ye revelation. I mean, just think about it with words. We become Muslims right with a
word a person can leave the religion of Islam.
		

			What other examples I
		

			mean marriages with one word, a person becomes highlighted for you. And then those moments of
intimacy are like an act of worship. And then with another word, the word of divorce, this person
becomes a complete stranger. And then those moments of intimacy are, fornication is a major sin
that's just through words. And that's why the prophets I said them, he said in the famous Hadith and
then Abda later kala mobile Kenny met him in Madrid, one in LA he met up La Habra them your vow
		

			that a person may utter a word which pleases Allah subhanaw taala so much without him realizing its
weight, and Allah raises him to very high degrees.
		

			And then on the other side of the Hadith, he said in an Abdullah the Kela mobile Kenya met him in
cerca de la Hila Utila darlin, yeah, we'd be happy to have them. And similarly, someone may utter a
word, which displeases Allah, without giving it much thought. And because of it, he just plummeted
to help.
		

			And I'm sure you'll agree with me like if you were to survey, the majority of the inmates of health
that was possible, what was it that has caused your suffering here? I would say that the majority
will trace it back to
		

			something they had said. And in fact, when the Prophet SAW Selim himself was asked the question,
what is it that causes people to enter?
		

			Paradise most? Do you remember what you said that Allah hospital, the Taqwa of Allah, consciousness
of Allah, and good manners? And then they said to him, what causes people to go into * the most.
And he said, I'll femoral Well, Farge, meaning mouth speech, and the private parts. These things
take people to help the most speech and the private ones.
		

			Now, if you were to think about, you know, the sheer amount of people we interact with in our lives,
I mean, who are they we have believers on believers, pious people, rebellious people, Stingy people,
generous, calm, angered, humble, arrogant. This Quran, this Quranic principle is of is of the
essence, because we can apply it 10s or hundreds of times a day. So who would you say is the
worthiness of all people when it comes to applying this principle to
		

			parents, parents, nobody before parents, Allah said, One Adecco Lahoma off don't even say to them
off well that and horrible man don't even disrespect them. What will Omar golden Karima but address
them with words of honor.
		

			And the famous incident of Abdullah who now when his mom called him he responded with a loud voice
just a little bit louder than has he decided to repent to Allah and He freed two slaves hoping Allah
with forgiven. So Mum and Dad, another group of people who deserve our application of this principle
on them is our spouses. It's just so sad maybe you agree to see someone.
		

			Angel of Nicean public counselor sympathetic with everyone you know, tiptoeing doesn't want to
offend people and talking but when he gets home or when she gets home, so different persona, penny
pinching, miser, harsh, foul mouthed, like a demon. For the man Michelle Kenny, he said that so many
people fall into this calamity Kathy Ilan Minh and Maya columnist with he has a huge word by so many
people fall into this trap. He goes,
		

			photographer to either Latvia Allah who can us onesie was Jarwin nevsun. Why? He says that you you
see a person who meets his wife. After meeting people, they have the worst manners. They become so
daring. Least in goodness. And then he says what he loved the early Middle Atlantic but when he
meets strangers, right, he softens up.
		

			His his mood improves. He becomes generous and his goodness amplifies. And then email Michelle Kenny
he says that
		

			last Chuck anamod Kanika Delica Hawa mahal motel feel
		

			a person who does this.
		

			He's been deprived of success and help from Allah.
		

			And he's gone astray from the street path and he says we ask Allah to protect us from that we ask
Allah to protect us from that. Clay Docomo hydrothermally It isn't it the famous Hadith? Well, I
definitely recommend
		

			the best of you are those who are best to their wives and I am the best towards my wives.
		

			So again, who are the worthiness of people who deserve this principle? When we are exercising it we
said mom and dad we said it husband and wife that's not just husband towards wife by the way, are
you nurse? Yeah, Adam will
		

			prophesy us and it was asked who does a woman Oh, the greatest rights to he said her husband. Then
he was asked a question.
		

			And who does a man are the greatest rights to? He said his mother. So Mum and Dad, wife husband who
else who deserved this principle were only nasty husband speak to people with good words.
		

			There was a need
		

			people will have needs of us. It could be a financial need it could be knowledge it could be advice
time. Remember what I'm gonna set you left for that? And Allah says as for those who ask of you,
don't repel him. Don't disparage you could be advising it could be time money. If you find yourself
unable to help we turn them away using the kindness of words speak to people with good words.
		

			So Mum and Dad, Wife Husband those in need those who are senior to us.
		

			That's in your seniority could be by way of knowledge could be by way of age. Again, when addressing
them, we address them with the finest let's let you send me an MLM ug let KB Aruna welcome sorry,
Rana YRF, the IE me now who he who does not honor the elders, for profit. So I sent him said, it's
not amongst us, nor shows mercy to the younger ones, and does not give our scholars of their rights.
He says these three categories they're not from amongst us.
		

			So now that we've kind of looked at some of the most deserving people, when it comes to the
application of this principle, speak to people good words, should also address maybe some of the
circumstances when people are most prone to forgetting this principle of speaking to people with
good ones.
		

			What about when on the receiving end of the insult? Shall we you and I've been there? Right? That's
a key time to remember speak to people with good words for either for the homage or you don't
shenana Elijah?
		

			praising his true servants. He said that they are the ones whom when the ignorant people address
them harshly, they respond with words of peace.
		

			Your man was shabby, I think you and I've discussed this one before as well. Where you know he was
insulted. You know, shagging, the famous scholar of Hadith, right? And he said to him that it
couldn't do cannot alter Fatah for Allah who then became a contributor for Allah who that if I am as
you say, I am May Allah forgive me. But if I am not as you say I am they may Allah forgive you.
		

			And a man said to Leonardo da that local wa he that unless I mean, Asha, if you were to insult me
just once, you're going to hear 10
		

			He said to him, Allah He local Dasha, NASA Mandela, Hayden, I swear, if you insulted me 10 times,
you wouldn't even hear one response from me. It's amazing. I think really, the way to look at that
is just to realize that you know, we have so much on our minds as Muslims, we have the authority to
Allah, working towards the home of the Hereafter, the heart should not find room to store these
types of results. We don't have the time to kind of mull over these things. They see life that
Muslim we should see lives like a marketplace. And in the end of that marketplace, some people walk
away they've made a profit. Other people leave me the loss. So they have no time to waste. They
		

			speak to people with good words. So that's a key time I think we need to remember this principle.
We're prone to forgetting it when being insulted. Also, when joking
		

			the purpose of a joke or an Arabic they call it Musa then if you've heard of this one before, it's
the idea is to lighten the atmosphere. You're supposed to bring joy, not sadness, embarrassment,
friction. If it does that, then it's no longer a joke. It's so Korea. It's mockery.
		

			In the Companions, they said the prophets I send them that era sunnah Allah here in Canada in
Moodle, Messenger of Allah, you joke with us. Right? He said, Yeah, Nina who? In the haka, but I
only speak the truth. So his jokes, were free from mockery. There's no lying, there's no poop,
scaring others. There's no excessiveness, you know, so even his jokes, they honored the principle of
speak to people with good lives.
		

			A third circumstance, I think it's really important to remember when
		

			we can forget this principle is when we disagree over a matter, Islamic or otherwise, by the way, it
doesn't matter. You know, universal Salafi. He said that I've never seen a man as wise as a
shattering. We disagreed once over a matter, you fell out over a matter. Then we met and he held my
hand. And he said, Father of Musa, can we not be brothers? Even if we disagree over a maximum?
		

			Can we still be brothers even if we disagree?
		

			These are meant by that I think this is how a man
		

			input should be presented as restraint. And to see the bigger picture and the man will there have
been comments on that incident I just shared with you. And he said this just indicates how wholesome
the mind of enamel Shafi was and how deep his knowledge was for Mozilla and Navara. Because peers,
they will always differ, appears they will always differ.
		

			Anyway, I mean, you know, the famous Hadith maybe we'll kind of round off with this prophets I send
them who said that, in paradise, there are rooms whose outside is visible from it's inside, it's
inside is also visible from its outside, an Arab Bedouin. He said, Who do they belong to a messenger
of Allah. He said Lehmann,
		

			a global column for atomic bomb, where a dama cm or Celebi lovely lady, when I saw you, they are the
ones who are best in speech. Look, he started with that, in another narration, those who are most
gentle in speech, and those who distribute food, those who fast regularly and those who pray and
when people are asleep.
		

			I believe that if you agree or not, that most of the differences that take place between us are
rarely due to issues are difficult to resolve, but simply owing to the manner in which one expressed
himself poor choice of wording poor choice of tone, poor choice of context, most of the disasters of
life and the afterlife can be evaded by just evoking this Quranic principle before our very
expression Partnership does offer mercy little story I mentioned regarding
		

			I still want to go fishing
		

			or being happy
		

			will help win as
		

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			obey shield oh, oh.
		

			Well go
		

			follow up on hold it up on Oh,
		

			nice. Yeah.
		

			Phil Oh, one as Selena Hooton Mozila