Adnan Rajeh – The Empty Space #06 – The Sins and Solutions
AI: Summary ©
The speakers stress the importance of achieving success in various areas of life, including work and personal development. They stress the need for healthy biology and luck, finding the starting points for decisions, and humility to create ego and cause it to inflate and inflate ego. Slow progress is necessary to achieve goals, and showing pride in Allah's quote "ship" is essential to teach others about his negativity and avoid harms. Slow progress is necessary to achieve sincerity and teach others about his quote "ship" to live in a way that doesn't cause problems.
AI: Summary ©
Today is the sixth episode of the series
The Empty Space and today's episode is The
Sins and Solutions.
Our plan is inshallah to have a Q
&A session tomorrow if there's enough interest in
how everyone and if not then we'll kind
of end it as a six episode series.
Now by far six episodes is not remotely
enough to actually address all the all the
topics but I just hope that with with
this series I've opened the door and maybe
clarified a few obscure concepts and paved a
small pathway for people to start walking down
in terms of dealing with their with their
with their selves, their souls and spirits and
reactions and instincts and feelings and thoughts and
behaviors and start actually taking that seriously and
understanding that that is your key to being
a successful Muslim both in this life and
in the hereafter and to make it to
Jannah inshallah.
Today I'm going to talk about the four
major sins of the heart or the soul
and explain a little bit about them and
whatever time I have left after that I'll
maybe have a few dishonorable mentions of other
sins that maybe we should we should know
about but the list is quite long of
the sins of the heart and the scholars
have you know traditionally talked about them obviously
you find a lot there's a lot of
resources and books out there that you can
you can use I'm not sure how much
of these how many of these resources are
translated to English but I know that there's
a lot of interest in this field and
you can you'll find scholars who've been talking
about it if you look around and there's
at least 25 different sins the four major
ones are the most important they are definitely
way ahead of everything all the rest of
them they actually affect all the rest if
you fix the four major sins then the
rest will start to slowly disappear or decrease
in intensity and become easier to to deal
with obviously all the strategies that I talked
about and tools that I mentioned are going
to be needed in order for you to
kind of tackle these four major sins the
first one al ajb, vanity and by the
way all all Abrahamic religions Judaism Christianity and
Islam all have these these sins mentioned heavily
in their holy books and in their traditions
so you know it's not uncommon for you
to have to share this with them with
a non-muslim person and they and they
relate to it and because they've heard it
before because every faith historically has talked about
these things and has pointed them out as
problems that exist in human behavior and that
need to be dealt with and it's not
just the Abrahamic faiths you'll find them now
other faiths around the world that have talked
about these things but we have a specific
approach to it as Muslims that I think
is valuable and really all you need I
don't think you need to study every approach
that every faith has ever had for these
problems the first one is as I said
vanity or al ajb and what is it
what does it actually mean what does it
mean al ajb or vanity is to feel
that your effort and your work and the
time that you spent and something special about
you is the reason that you're successful it's
the only reason or the major reason or
the basic reason that you're successful to feel
that the spotlight needs to be on you
for whatever it is that's going on to
feel that you're the the center of the
universe of the center of the stories of
many other people around you al ajb and
vanity is just an overwhelming feeling of self
-value or an overestimated feeling of self-value
that the nafs develops I pointed out previously
that that's a good thing that the nafs
gives you self-value we don't want to
take that away the point of me talking
about al ajb or vanity is not so
that you start to have no self that
you begin that you end up having no
self-value no self-esteem not at all
it's just cutting it down to the proper
size it's just getting it to the right
size so it turns into something called confidence
which is what Allah subhana wants us to
have and for the right reasons but a
inflated ego which is what al ajb or
vanity is is probably the worst or the
number one sin of the heart that exists
it is that when I say it's number
one it's because all it affects all the
rest I'm gonna go I'm gonna go by
sequence by the way I'm gonna take these
sins by the most dangerous and then move
move forward al ajb because it starts on
the inside doesn't require others al ajb is
something that is developed on the inside you
don't actually have other people around you when
you're developing it and it and it just
focuses all the praise for whatever happened to
you on on yourself does that mean that
I'm saying oh whatever you were able to
achieve you did not participate and of course
you did of course you did but if
we're gonna take it the reality of what
actually happened we have to be honest by
by let let's break this down you know
realistically alhamdulillah you were able to you know
achieve great success in your profession alhamdulillah so
you achieve that success in profession and then
you have to deal with this with this
al ajb with this vanity that's starting to
build because when you look back and say
well I worked very hard I studied for
many many many years and I did not
waste time after I finished studying and I
went right into the workplace and I worked
very hard and was very creative and I
stayed up long nights and I put up
with with no low pay because I had
to do a lot of internships in it
and I had to travel and you're saying
this is what I had to do to
actually achieve and that is correct the question
now needs to kind of will require us
to take a step a step back and
take a look here in order for you
to be able to study really hard you
needed to be nurtured and nourished as a
child you have to have a family that
took care of you in order for that
in order for you to actually qualify to
be someone who's able to go to school
and learn you'd have to have a proper
you know a reasonable IQ you'd have to
have been given a healthy biology and a
healthy and a healthy psychology to begin with
in order to be able to achieve that
on the way as you're studying going to
school and going to university in order for
you to actually stay you focused and to
be able to do you would have to
be given a certain degree of curiosity and
joy within learning the discipline itself to stay
concentrated in order for all these things that
I'm counting you didn't really get yourself you
didn't work for they were just handed to
you these are the building bricks of what
allowed you to become the person that you
became these building bricks were handed to you
Allah subhana wa ta'ala designed it for
you so that you would have them so
you do so really the achievements that you
have you have participated in but is your
participation the biggest part of that puzzle or
is it just a small part or is
it just a part of the puzzle and
the bigger part of the puzzle is everything
that happened beforehand is all the work that
happened in behind the scenes is the effort
your parents put in which is why biri
wadi is so important in Islam and all
of the ease that Allah subhana wa ta
'ala granted you and all of the blessings
that Allah subhana wa ta'ala bestowed upon
you allowing you to actually achieve that so
many things could have happened along the way
that would have stopped this achievement anyone who's
achieved anything knows that there's a lot of
risk involved in actually succeeding meaning there's a
lot of and they use the word luck
it's really not luck it's it's just being
fortunate as Allah subhana wa ta'ala yeah
I need helping you and aiding you down
your road so really what we're supposed to
do when we achieve something is we go
back and look and we say this instead
of say I did this and I did
that and I achieved this and I stayed
Allah subhana wa ta'ala blessed me with
the ability to do this Allah subhana wa
ta'ala allowed me a family that supported
me Allah subhana wa ta'ala granted me
a strong will and curiosity and determination Allah
subhana wa ta'ala granted me circumstances that
helped me do it Allah subhana wa ta
'ala granted me patience so now you're changing
the narrative narrative is going from I did
I did I did to Allah subhana wa
ta'ala allowed Allah subhana wa ta'ala
facilitated Allah subhana wa ta'ala offered that
is taking the spotlight from being on me
and pointing it elsewhere because it's not on
it's not I I participated but the thing
is Allah subhana wa ta'ala knows that
you participated and he told you I am
going to reward you for your participation beyond
your wildest imagination I'm going to give you
eternity in heaven for your for your participation
so you've already been told you're gonna be
fully compensated for your participation so to focus
the spotlight on yourself and ask to be
and praise yourself what you've done is a
bit of a stretch of the issue you
already been told you're going to be fully
compensated you're going to be given way more
than you ever imagined way more than what
you did was worth that's already been taken
care of Allah subhana I will praise you
come to me and I will praise you
for what you did no matter how small
it is no matter simple no matter how
simple your participation is in what you did
I'm going to praise you for it I'm
going to reward you for it for all
eternity so that's been taken care of so
what's left then to actually focus on praising
the one who allowed all this to happen
in the first place to focus on Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala that's why the actual solution
and treatment if I may management of vanity
is the concept of alhamd something that we
say a lot in our lives alhamdulillah that's
how you get rid of vanity not by
just saying it as I said yesterday there's
more than one way of doing invocation and
zikr but the zikr of the aql the
invocation of the mind of understanding the concept
of thinking of alhamdulillah what that means what
I'm in right now what I have right
now what I've been able to obtain in
my life what the success that I'm able
to achieve this all comes from Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala my but if you're really honest
with yourself again I talked about the importance
of being transparent with yourself you know what
your participation was you do I know mine
I know that it's not even worth mentioning
that what I did to actually achieve the
little the very small things I've achieved I
participated very very minimally in it very minimally
is all that they see it of Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala that's just being honest that's
not being humble you're not supposed to say
that in a in a way where it's
just it's just being said this is for
show no no it's true it has to
be truthful no you actually feel actually acknowledge
that my participation and everything I have is
very minimal it's all the that they see
it of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala the gift
of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala the blessing of
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala and that's not saying
it just to make Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
happy is the truth some people say but
they don't believe it and all you have
to do and it's easily exposed time will
expose it in any circumstances and experiences will
expose someone who actually believes that they are
you know divinely special and different from everyone
around them that they there's something about me
that makes me special and that's why I've
been able to do there's something about a
lot of special granted you this opportunity granted
you this ability it's just a difference between
me sitting here and talking and feeling that
this is a series that I put together
that I put a lot of effort in
and saying this is a blessing that Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala bestowed upon upon me the
opportunity to sit down and speak of his
deen that he granted me enough knowledge he
granted me enough time enough teachers enough people
around me to support me the energy to
do to actually sit down and speak of
his deen easily he could have distracted me
by a million things in life there is
an infinite number of things that could have
happened that could have stopped me from doing
this is a blessing so how do I
view it depends on how it just comes
down to how do you view something simply
there's not even an accomplishment I'm just giving
an example something simple like this how do
you view it is this an accomplishment or
is this a blessing from Allah that requires
us to be even more grateful to continue
to be more grateful that Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala granted granted us the opportunity to do
something like that and it's just it's just
taking the focus of praise from yourself and
say me me me I did I did
I do Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala he did
it's very simple alhamdulillah does that just reminds
hamd for me who are you praising hamd
for myself praise me for no hamdulillah praise
Allah because all of it came from Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala again this is the point
of this is not so that you have
no self-esteem you feel that you're you're
very worth for Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala because
you're so worthy he wants to put you
in Jannah for all eternity you want you
to be confident in who you are that
confidence you you stems from your confidence in
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala that he oversees your
life that he believes in you and that
he has given you a destiny of greatness
and he wants you to achieve it but
you're going down that path of greatness and
you're confident that you'll achieve it understanding that
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is the one who's
offering you everything within it so at the
end when you actually make it to the
finish line it's Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala he
did all this I'm just I'm just very
very fortunate that he offered me the opportunity
then he bestowed the blessings it changes right
you say well that is not humility humility
is gonna come in a second the opposite
of vanity is not humbleness is confidence I
imagine it like a pendulum swinging inside the
nafs it swings to the far right where
you're extremely vain and you believe that everything
you that everything good to happen to you
you deserved it and you're the one who
brought it forward or it swings to the
other extreme where you have no self-esteem
at all where you feel that you're completely
worthless that nothing good should ever happen to
you that you have whatever you do is
not worthy you want as a Muslim you
hold it down in the middle it's right
there in the middle just where confidence exists
where you feel confident that Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala believes in you loves you oversees what
you're doing and that you are destined for
greatness and that you can walk down that
path and achieve it as long as Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala is on your side as
long as you are on Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala side which is a better way of
putting it it's holding down to that confidence
Qarun in the Quran you can say well
Iblis isn't it Iblis had all four Iblis
had all the problems of the heart and
this is why he's unique Qarun is the
example of our job that we have Qarun
we was told by his people by his
friends by his family what I tend to
say no sleep I come in a dunya
enjoy your enjoy I need the dunya that
Allah gave you gave you a lot of
wealth enjoy it I can go assing come
on I said Allah would be and he
give it with excellence just like Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala gave it to you with with
excellence in a lot of they told him
that doesn't mean don't be happy no it's
because Allah as I said many times Allah
never tells you not to have an emotion
and emotion is gonna be there he's talking
about behaviors and the Quran means don't be
vain don't be vain Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
doesn't like the vein what was his response
if you go to the surah and surah
al-qasas if you go to the ayat
you'll find that his response was I was
give I achieved this money I was I
got I obtained this wealth because of my
knowledge I'm a very good merchant I'm a
very good businessman I knew where to invest
when to invest how to invest I worked
I knew I knew the market I understood
it took years to study it I understood
it well and that's what I have what
I have that's how I view what Qarun
does if I was living with Qarun that's
how I should view it but that's not
how he should view it if you're wondering
what that means I'll explain I come by
someone it was very successful my brother caught
it here I come and speak to I
see him successful my job is to see
his contribution in his success that's my job
I look at it and say mashallah you
did this you did this you did this
and I thank him for it and I
and I praise the fact that he put
in all that effort that's my job but
that's not his job he's not allowed to
do that I'm allowed to do that for
him and everyone around him should do that
for him that's how we elevate people in
our society that's how we help people go
farther and achieve more and be more successful
and that's what we're supposed to do but
they're not supposed to do that for themselves
they're supposed to look at what they have
in their lives as it's all from Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala all of it is the
gift and the blessing of Allah because they
know really what their contribution is on the
inside they know they have knowledge that I
don't have I don't know they may have
put in the 99% that's that's the
assumption I should have and that's how I
should deal with it and but they should
that person should deal with it differently on
the inside.
Qarun unfortunately had the wrong understanding he was
saying to himself what people should be saying
but he shouldn't be saying you know then
this is a lot he gave it to
me said it's all me so Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala opened the earth and had to
swallow him and everything he owned it was
a bad ending for him but the lesson
in the Quran for you can't live like
that you can't think like that what do
you mean it's all from you you you
aren't from you yourself didn't you didn't produce
it how could be what you've achieved with
it yours if you don't even own your
body or your spirit or your soul and
you're just using things you're using it from
Mother Earth it's hers it's gonna go back
to her you can't really hold on to
it and the spirit came from Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala he owns it and he owns
earth itself everything that you are is owned
by Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala doesn't make sense
that everything good that you do is also
owned by Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala you'll say
well what about the bad things the bad
things are we're preventable we're avoidable you could
have avoided them he gave you the tools
to do all the right stuff doing the
right stuff is the least you can do
when you do something good with what you've
got after Allah subhana gave you everything regarding
it that's the least you can do how
are you saying it's me it's me it's
me you're not even how does it make
sense doesn't make sense now that's why in
order to get rid of vanity hamd has
to be a major core concept that you
live by hamdulillah hamdulillah so every time Muslims
each other hamdulillah repeating the concept time and
time again Allah is praiseworthy he is the
Hamid he is the one who's worthy of
praise I am NOT I am NOT worthy
of praise because I'm a servant of my
job is to serve is not to be
praised Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is the king
he's the one who's worthy of praise and
if we live by that by repeating in
hamdulillah and doing zikr both with the tongue
and with the mind and reminding yourself of
these concepts by listening to people talk about
it time and time again till it really
you know sinks in that that's how I'm
supposed to live my life you'll get rid
of vanity that ego see there's enough room
in this world for our bodies there's not
enough room in this world for all our
egos I can fit yeah I need 500
people in this place but I can't fit
maybe three or four egos here when the
ego is too big when the heart gets
small and the ego gets big the balance
inside the human being doesn't there's an imbalance
and they don't function properly anymore the heart
has to become bigger full of height and
the ego has to get smaller it shouldn't
diminish it shouldn't go away very important we're
not trying to destroy it we're just trying
to get it to the right size that
confidence that allows you to continue to achieve
and then whenever you achieve you turn to
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala and you and you
and you repeat his praise and you sing
his praise subhanahu wa'ta'ala because he offered
you the opportunity to do all that that's
how you get rid of vanity again it's
a long topic I'm trying to summarize the
ideas as much as possible the second disease
of the heart is in kibber arrogance arrogance
is different than vanity arrogance needs people around
for comparisons purposes vanity is just all about
me used looking in the mirror and feeling
that you did everything kibber is when you
look around and say I'm better I'm just
better I don't know why but I'm better
or maybe you do know why and that's
why you're better and that's musiba this is
one of the biggest masaeb it stems from
vanity that's why I started with vanity because
that's where it stems it starts with vanity
then turns later on into kibber even though
kibber is probably the more dangerous one of
the two but one is the beginning is
starting point and one is the kind of
the later on result kibberu batarul haqqi wa
ghimtun nas as the Prophet alayhi salatu wasalam
explained to us but what is if you
come to a point in arrogance you refuse
haqq anymore you refuse to be told you're
wrong you believe that you're not able to
be wrong people can be wrong but not
me I have too much experience I've done
too much I don't make mistakes well ghimtun
nas looking down on people they can make
with it this is a musiba and there's
many many ways for you to get rid
of it many ways most of them are
going to be based on again having proper
perspectives you think how do we judge if
someone's better than someone else what is the
criterion or what is the criteria to say
that this person is better than that person
it's impossible to come up with that no
one can agree to it number one number
two who gets to actually make that judgment
who gets to say this person better than
that person one Allah subhana Allah subhana is
the one who makes that judgment that this
person is better than that person he refuses
to make that judgment in dunya in dunya
whoever is better than him no one will
know Allah subhana Allah has held withheld that
information and he will explain it and he
will reveal it Yom Al-Qiyamah in this
in the turn in the sense of who's
going to go to I need a whole
fire really really a double that who will
go to Jannah and the different ranks in
Jannah I mean he's gonna make that judgment
for us Yom Al-Qiyamah for us to
make it in dunya is actually overstepping our
boundaries in terms of trying to act like
we know what we do not know we're
making you know it's a very risky and
it's a very disrespectful action to act like
you're better than someone else that you somehow
you have the knowledge that you know who
told you that who shared that with you
that somehow you you're better than someone and
based on what did you make that judgment
what are the things that allowed you to
make the judgment well I have more money
or I have more degrees or I'm more
successful I have a better life in order
for us to be able to judge fairly
who won a race we have to have
a number of different elements to be able
to make that judgment the starting points first
of all have to be the same and
it has to be similar or equal starting
points it's impossible to know that that's why
some that's why friends will have be arrogant
or one another and siblings will too that's
where you find the most of these problems
because there's an illusion that I grew up
with this person so I know that they
have the same starting point that I do
the same starting the same starting point that
I had because they you know we grew
up in the same house we were given
the same you know raised the same way
we ate the same food we wore the
same clothes went to the same school if
your friends went to the same school we
got the same education so we think that
we know what their starting point is you
don't you don't you have no idea what
their psychological structure on the inside looks like
you have no idea what their experience is
where you don't know you have no idea
how they processed information you don't know what
Allah gave them you don't know the hand
that they were dealt you don't know you
only know the hand you were dealt that's
all you know and you barely know that
we barely know the hand that were dealt
for me to know what the other person's
hand is so in order for me to
say well I did better I have to
know exactly what hand he had and then
I can say whether I because someone who
starts with a hundred dollars and makes a
million another person who starts with a thousand
dollars and makes two million you can't say
you can't say the guy with two is
but no you can't is it but you
can't really say anything you can't really say
anything because we don't know we don't know
what we do we have zero information we
have no information it's a problem that exists
everywhere this this concept of feeling superior to
others and it's and it's very dangerous and
it's what Iblis said and I'm better than
him and then he gave a completely unrealistic
improper reason I made a fire he's made
of this mud water and soil and I
know it looks unauthentic it looks ugly even
though it's the reason that the human being
is as unique as he is because of
that mix that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
made him from he's like I'm pure you
know the reason you have isn't even correct
and the next will do that will give
you bogus reasons for why you're better and
you'll look for them many of us have
believed that we're better just based on nothing
really I'm just better somehow I'm more special
I have a my mind works uniquely I'm
different I it's just ways than us again
the next wants you to be higher wants
to be superior wants you to last longer
once you'd be stronger so it makes up
these illusions it inflates that ego of yours
that you're you feel better than people hopefully
you go farther it doesn't work again the
pendulum is swinging here between arrogance where we
think we're better than everyone and then inferiority
complex is way over here we don't want
that we want humbleness that's where humility and
humbleness exists right in the middle or in
the middle and what it actually is what
humbleness is is just acknowledgement of reality it's
not this fake show we put on or
we act like we know we we think
everybody's equal to us or better than us
no no it's a reality understanding that the
only sins that I know in this world
are mine I that those are the only
sins and shortcomings and flaws that I'm aware
of or my shortcomings sins and flaws I
do not know anyone else's shortcomings sins or
flaws I don't I have no idea because
I'm not living in their body I don't
have their soul I can assume I can
add to my sin of arrogance this sin
of bad assumption and judgment which just makes
things even worse or I can say I
don't know so why would I use knowledge
I don't have to make a judgment when
I have knowledge of my own shortcomings so
I know that I'm not doing very well
I know that I am not someone who
is functioning properly I'm far away from from
from pleasing Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala I'm far
away from being in any form perfect in
any discipline in any way of life any
form or manner of life itself how is
it that I think I'm better than another
person I don't know what's going on with
them it makes no sense unless you're just
making a lot of assumptions based on based
on nothing it's based on an urge to
want to be better than somebody and you
were never asked to do that and a
loss of pounds I will take care of
that for you he will make that judgment
for you he will say you'll make the
amma who is better and who's not he's
the one I'm telling everything I use a
cool down for someone but you know who's
a key man yes you'll you'll say he'll
make that boy don't worry just like he'll
reward you for your success and their participation
that you have you'll say who's who did
better than someone else but for us to
think that we're better than other people is
just based on false information that's why the
the way to fix it is this to
fall it's asking for forgiveness how well when
you're doing this to follow what you're actually
doing is you're focusing on your flaws you're
focusing on your shortcomings you're focusing on your
sins and your mistakes someone who is preoccupied
with their own flaws own mistakes or doesn't
have time to see the flaws of others
the way that we are able to generate
arrogance is by the nefs observing others seeing
a mistake and seeing I don't have that
mistake I must be better that's how the
soul works because some because it can't judge
everything so just look around hmm he does
that well I don't do that then I'm
better than that person oh he he spoke
that way or he doesn't have as much
knowledge obviously he was asked a question that
I know the answer for that he doesn't
know the answer for he owns that you
know the way he behaved you'll find something
he has less than I do I have
more my net worth is higher whatever it
is that you use to generate arrogance or
I'm more popular people like me or I'm
a more fit or a more healthy or
whatever it is then if just looks for
something a flaw on the other person sees
the flaw and then it fixes it targets
it just it goes for it so that's
that's I'm better than that person because he
does that and I do it or he
doesn't do that and I do but someone
who's preoccupied with their own flaws doesn't have
time to look around what do you know
maybe the flaws of that person is a
hasana and better than your own hasana what
do you mean maybe that person grew up
in a very different circumstance was dealt a
very different hand and the fact that he
is where he is right now with the
flaw that he has is worth more to
Allah subhan Allah than everything that you've ever
done and will ever do in your life
you don't know you don't know you have
no idea and that's why we don't we
can't make that judgment someone I'll give you
an example an extreme example to understand Allah
subhana that I was blessed me with more
than I can ever be you know I
can ever think for grew up in a
in a loving family with loving parents who
took care of my education and I had
a house and I had clothing and I
had food and I had there was enough
affection and care and support around me I
was able to you know finish my education
and work someone goes up in a broken
home abusive parents drug addicts no values and
no ethics were taught to this and given
to this person live but grew up in
a war zone was complete continuously physically and
emotionally abused during their childhood if that person
does not turn into a psychopath then I
think they're probably most likely better than I
than me you'll make a man they're gonna
be judged based on what they were given
if that person somehow finishes high school and
gets a decent job that they're definitely better
than me definitely because where did the difference
of the hand that this person was dealt
and the hand that I was dealt I
barely utilized the potential that I had I
barely even did anything with it extremely lazy
but this person was able to remove himself
or herself from an environment of just negativity
and crime and and drugs and abuse and
still get an education and still live a
decent life with decent values that is a
huge so you can't judge people so when
you see someone walking around the street asking
don't judge them you don't have to give
them money but don't judge them please don't
look at them say well look at they
really said their lives and feel superior as
you're driving you don't know you don't know
anything what are you saying Allah he making
make that mistake and Allah subhan that will
take can take it all the way there's
a known story that the you were taught
that two men were walking on a mountain
so a man walking up the mountain was
a person who just lived a life of
sin just as far away from religion as
you can possibly imagine just so far away
from doing anything right going up the mountain
and coming down the mountain is one of
the only one of the great people but
very pious human beings who have been worshiping
Allah subhana for many many decades so the
going up these mountains so the guy going
up the mountain the sinner he looks up
and he sees this you know this pious
man he says well I it's inappropriate and
improper for a man like me to walk
on the same path as a man like
him it's just not I'm not worthy I'm
so he goes and he takes a different
route because he just feels like he's not
worth you know walking in the same path
and the man who's coming down the pious
man he looks down and he sees this
this sinner coming up he's like it's not
proper for someone like me pious and virtuous
and to walk in a path like that
man so he takes the other route going
down the story goes that the sinner didn't
reach the top of the mountain until Allah
subhan Allah had changed his heart and brought
him closer to him and the good man
did not and the pious person did not
make it to the end of the mountain
before Allah subhan Allah had sent his heart
astray once Shaykh Kareem Raja one of our
one of the scholars of Sham one of
the great reciters of the Quran and scholars
of the sciences of the Quran he came
to our house and we told him you
know tells a story or give us a
piece of wisdom so he so he told
us a story I'll never forget this story
that he told us he looked at me
when he was telling the story I was
young was maybe 15 or 16 but I've
always thanked him for it because it meant
a lot to me that it sat with
me the story was that some and he
once upon a time there was a great
scholar of knowledge that people would come to
visit and benefit from benefit from and learn
from from all over the land he was
the number one name in the discipline of
knowledge that he had and he was someone
that people in the thousands would gather just
to take him yeah people would wait in
line just to be able to say hi
to him a person of true virtue to
he would see his he would see in
his dream that he was in Yom Al
-Qiyamah and it was a scary moment and
he's walking around trying to find his way
and he sees a shaytan Iblis himself and
Iblis is you know organizing all these hooks
he has all these hooks that he's organizing
in and some of these hooks are huge
they're as big as a mountain and some
of the hooks are so small they can't
even you can't even see them and he
asks Iblis what are all these and he
says these are the hooks that once I'm
thrown into Jahannam I'm gonna hook people with
and pull them down with me the hooks
were all attached to his waist so I'm
preparing them so that when it time is
ready I hook them and we go down
so he's looking at all these hooks and
he's one saying to himself I must that
big the huge hook must be for me
honey I'm the the leader of Islamic thought
and in my time so ask who is
that who's the biggest hook for so it
tells him that's for an old elderly man
who sits at the end of your masjid
beside the shoes continuously organizing the shoes and
taking care of the clean cleanliness of the
masjid no one really seems to pay attention
to him I've been trying to get this
person to go astray for for 60 years
and I haven't been able so I prepared
this big hook maybe so that maybe I'll
be successful so he says to himself in
his dream I must have the one after
must be mine so he asked him who's
the second biggest hook for so it gives
him another name and he asks him about
all the hooks going down to the smallest
hook and he Shaitaan fails to mention his
name so the scholar gets upset and he
asks the Shaitaan no offense here but where's
my hook and why do you have these
hooks for everybody I know but there's none
for me so he told him oh you're
falling way ahead of me you don't need
a hook yeah there's no reason for me
to hook you you're already you're way ahead
I'll be coming after you he said that
story to us and I subhanallah stuck with
me when you're arrogant you don't let's go
to Jannah to mankind if you can't be
he missed quality don't let him give her
he who has the amount of atom of
arrogance and he will not enter Jannah you
will stay out until you get rid of
it you will stay outside of Jannah until
you rid yourself of whatever arrogance still exists
in you of feeling better than others you're
not here to do that you have no
right to do that you have no reason
to do that you barely know yourself how
could you be making judgments of others how
could you think how could you make an
assumption that I am better you don't know
anything so just be humble I am sinful
I am full of sin I am full
of mistakes I ask Allah subhana to forgive
me who I am compared to others doesn't
matter this is not again the point of
this is not so that you develop an
inferiority complex I've seen that happen I've seen
people want to get rid of arrogance and
then they turn the opposite they become they
get rid of their vanity and their arrogance
and the pendulum that was swinging way over
to the right they swing it way over
to the left that's not what we want
if you want it somewhere in the middle
where you're not interested in comparing yourself to
other people you see you're not supposed to
see people higher than you keep getting rid
of kibbutz just not seeing yourself higher than
people just getting rid of that whole comparison
the nafs was continuous to try and do
it and when it does remind it to
I don't know Imam Ghazali has a really
nice way of kind of saying what he
does for himself because everyone has their own
way of doing this he said if I
see a Muslim who is older than me
I say this person has been a servant
for Allah subhana longer than me so he's
better than me and if I see someone
who's younger than me I say this person
has lived less so he has sinned less
so he's better than me fine but what
happens if someone is exactly I don't know
but that's that's what he said in his
in his again everyone has a different way
of reasoning how to get rid of that
feeling of arrogance I think it's very simple
I think it's just being realistic you know
your sin you don't know others you know
your hand you don't know others focus on
that that's why istighfar is the best solution
it treats it completely just that's why the
Prophet would tell us I would make istighfar
in a day a hundred times because you're
just focusing on the nafs meaning to be
because the Prophet has a million reasons to
be arrogant why because he was told you're
better than everyone the Prophet was told this
during his life and he still wasn't arrogant
he still didn't think he was better didn't
act like he was better he still treated
people as if they were better than him
as if they you know they mattered more
than him because that's how he believed that
he felt I'm I'm not I'm sinful he's
always y'all are busy y'all are
busy oh Allah forgive me for my sins
the focus on on you know the ones
and arrogance is an important topic that needs
to be dealt with but it's not complicated
you just have to remind yourself of the
realities of your own life and who you
are and that you're a servant you're here
servants don't have egos right a true servant
doesn't have an ego an ego is for
the master Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is the
master he has of course he's a mutakabbir
that's his name al mutakabbir why because that's
his nature his nature is greatness his nature
is being supreme his nature is superior so
he's mutakabbir it's not against his nature but
for a servant to be mutakabbir makes no
sense your nature is to serve your nature
is simple your nature is weak why are
you superior why are you trying to be
superior it goes against who you are as
a creation so get rid of it and
you live a much more satisfying and fulfilling
life if you do if you get rid
of arrogance you'll be happier I guarantee it
you'll just live a better life because you
stop comparing you stop trying to you stop
you just figure out it's not worth it
I don't know Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala will
make the judgment I just have to do
my best with what I've got you have
your hand yeah play it to the best
of your ability just use it as much
as make sure you use it to the
best of your ability let others do their
thing let them do what they need to
do so that's the second one and again
there's much more to talk about well I
have at least but oh my gosh we're
actually running out of time probably going again
before so the third one that needs to
be talked about today at least is the
third one area oh my gosh it has
a word in English that I actually look
up before I ever give a talk about
yeah and then I forget immediately after because
I've never heard anybody use it before it's
just a word that's not used in English
it started to know OS something I don't
know what it is it's a show-off
Rhea is basically wanting others to appreciate you
it's wanting the praise from other people's wants
wanting people to see what you're doing that's
what Rhea is Rhea and summa is basically
looking for others to have their eyesight upon
you it's not it's not having a loss
of count as I said upon you being
enough it's not enough it's the bottom of
mechanic and the lawyer you're hoping that you
have status and the hearts and eyes and
thoughts of other people which is now the
problem with Rhea you know I think Kibbutz
is a bit more dangerous but the issue
with Rhea is that its opposite is the
core worship heart heart worship or how active
active worship of the heart that exists in
Islam because the opposite of the eyes of
losses sincerity and a class is the most
important part of the Dean it's a third
of the Quran it's a couple of words
of the cool wallow I had a loss
is the third of the Quran it's the
only sort of the Quran that name isn't
in the wording of it the concept it's
the concept itself is that when you do
something you do it for the sake of
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala and Rhea is just
that it's like a termite that just goes
into your stack of good deeds and just
eats them from the inside until they're hollow
and empty and they have no weight it's
when you're doing something for a loss of
count out but you're not just wanting a
loss of pounds I like to see it
you want others as well to see it
now does that is that it mean that
if anyone comes and says something nice to
us and we enjoy it that we're more
on you know no the property so someone's
asked that question he said no when you
when you do something good for the sake
of Allah and you you get appreciated for
it tilka you know Bushra movement that's inshallah
good news that Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala has
accepted your deed that's why I told you
just a few moments ago when someone achieves
something we should come and thank them and
we should say you know you put in
all the effort we should praise them because
that's how that's what we're supposed to do
in society and then they have to can
deal with the other parts of that's why
over praising people can be a problem so
we shouldn't I need don't over praise your
your children don't overpraise people because you're actually
making it harder for them to get rid
of their vanity and to continue to be
it just to be sincere and holding on
to and react just stems from that we
are naturally you know we naturally want to
want people to see us doing stuff that's
a part of the instincts of the nests
in the soul it's fine all children as
they grow up want their kids want their
parents to look at them if you have
a kid you know Baba look Baba look
why because that they don't know how to
function any other way they need someone to
see what they're doing to appreciate them that's
normal it's a normal part of development there's
nothing wrong to want people as you grow
up to see what you're doing to want
your parents to see what you're doing to
want your teachers to want people that you
look up to to see what you have
achieved that appreciation that praise that you get
that you know being impressed by what you've
done is important in order for you to
grow up a fully functioning satisfied calm human
being it's when you're older in age when
you achieve a certain age that you're able
to identify that the only opinion that matters
the only eye that matters looking at me
is the opinion and eye of Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala everyone else are the same we're
all the same we're all just as lost
just as scared just as weak as one
another we're all in this big sea of
life and we're just holding on don't be
fooled by people's masks again there's not an
issue of arrogance you have to that's why
these are these things are so delicate you
have to learn them time and time again
I would advise listening to the series more
than once especially if you're younger age especially
if I'm talking to my younger brothers and
sisters listen to it a few times because
you want to these concepts to kind of
slowly sink in because sometimes if you overdo
one then it can cause a different problem
they get rid of Riya meaning you have
to start feeling that the opinions of people
and their praise and what they say doesn't
matter to you that you know whether they
like it or not whether they're on board
and it doesn't really matter to you but
that can turn into arrogance where you just
feel like people are worthless and that's not
the point either of course social pressure and
social and social appraise and people and what
and the society's ability to do a little
model for now I'm okay is important that's
how we social pressures how we in peer
pressures how we stay in line growing up
that's how we keep societies functioning properly then
what is it that you're trying to say
here what I'm trying to say is that
when you're doing something good for the sake
of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala you're not focused
on what people's reactions are if you're doing
it properly you're doing it well you're doing
the right thing it doesn't matter whether they're
happy with it or not yes tell me
and I can match with them it becomes
equal to whether people praise you or they
or they don't but that has to be
in the context that you're doing the right
thing that you're taking feedback you should be
taking feedback you should be asking for feedback
so that you you adjust what you're doing
in a way that that serves people properly
I'm not saying you because people who don't
care about the individuals don't care about the
opinions of people end up not taking feedback
and never you know but never improving and
never getting better and never actually helping others
and he is just not wanting with the
actual action the approval of anyone but Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala it's just realizing that everyone
else is the same when someone comes oh
he is so good oh he's they don't
really care about you they don't really have
any you know control over anything don't it
doesn't matter once you grow up and you
get older in life you figure out that
everyone is focused on their own life when
they come and say something nice to you
it's just it's just just enjoy it for
the moment don't look for it don't do
it and hopefully in the hope of getting
that because no one really cares or celebrities
are always under that illusion and takes them
a while good you know those who are
wise amongst them figure out that doesn't matter
I'm doing what I do I do what
I enjoy you know whether there are actors
or singers or whatever it is that you
do they do it because they enjoy it
and then they walk away waiting around for
people to praise you showing off it doesn't
it's an illusion it doesn't last because no
one cares at the end people will move
on with their lives and and you think
that they really have your back but they
don't no one does but Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala and he will leave you as he
will strand you if you continue to seek
people's approval and not his own subhanahu wa'ta
'ala and he says I don't I have
no need for associates if you do something
for someone else let that someone else give
you the reward I'm not interested do it
for Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala and only him
realize and there's no Aziz and unfathomable and
imperiled but Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala there's no
truly strong qawiyy except Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
there's no creator but Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
there's no one who can offer reward but
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala no one can offer
status and strength but Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
teach the nafs that look what other the
eyes of other people seeing doesn't mean anything
they're not gonna get me hope because the
nafs wants you us others to see you
why because it thinks that if the public
sees you and they think a lot of
you that puts you ahead that gives you
strength that gives you gives you control that
gives you status means you'll probably survive more
you'll have more joy that's what the nafs
does you have to explain no no the
one that can actually offer me status offer
me strength is Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala the
rest don't mean anything they're just people it's
not to disrespect people it just doesn't matter
I'm doing it for Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
my focus is on pleasing Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala how do you get to that point
it's very simple another treatment that is through
dhikr, tasbih and ta'azim of Allah subhanahu
wa'ta'ala the reason that Riyadh exists the
reason that I can't think of the name
of it on ostentation that's exactly no one's
used this word ever before but it's in
the English language and it means exactly that
what wanting the approval of others and showboating
and showing off it stems from a lack
of respect for Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala it
sounds ugly isn't it because it is it
stems from the fact that we don't feel
that Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is as superior
to his creation as he actually is so
we feel that the opinions of people is
somehow equal so we want Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala to be happy with us but we
also want some people to be happy with
us at the same time what and we
want it equally because in our minds the
greatness of public of the public is equal
to the greatness of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
and that's a musibah tasbih exalting God ta
'azim magnifying God subhanahu wa'ta'ala is convincing
your nafs that no no no there is
no equality here Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is
the only one that matters the only opinion
that matters the only eye looking at me
that matters the only praise that I get
that matters comes from Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
everything else is and the nafs will hate
that at the beginning the nafs will hate
that it actually that's why we don't necessarily
teach that to the really younger ages because
a lot of the motivations that exist in
the hearts of young teenagers comes from wanting
people to think highly of them and that's
okay because that's how you develop yourself but
it's when you come to your 20s that
you have to start realizing no and that's
my advice really at that point that's when
and that's how I was taught it the
focus was on ijbin kibur and any other
problems until we reached a certain age where
we started to be taught to actually observe
riya in ourselves and get rid of it
and taught the grandness of Allah subhanahu wa'ta
'ala truly and powerfully to come to that
point where you don't care anymore where it
doesn't matter you come you do your thing
you know whether you're not looking for the
praise you're not waiting for it it's not
making a difference to you it's not harming
you it's not making you think more of
yourself because riya leads to both vanity and
arrogance and arrogance and vanity also lead to
riya they're very much intertwined and they're very
much connected these these diseases they're not we
cannot I'm talking about them independently but they're
not independent they're not they're not actually independent
they're very much intertwined and understanding that is
important that one will affect the other negatively
so fixing one you're fixing the other at
the same time you're making it easier for
yourself so if you start battling and combating
all these disease at once with the small
with the steps that I talked about in
the tools that I brought up and the
and the concepts reminding yourself of these concepts
and performing they could you will slowly start
to get rid of all of them at
the same time you can't take one at
the time at a time it doesn't work
that way it just doesn't.
Performing ta'weem of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala
subhanallahu bihamdi subhanallahu wa'ta'ala exalted that he
is subhanallah he is the perfect one he
is the flawless he is the creator he
is the most strong he is the controller
the compeller the subduer subhanallah of this universe
what what what does some person like me
his opinion offer in light of his opinion
subhanahu wa'ta'ala because he's the one who
has to be happy so what you're doing
is that you perform your action and then
you're like y'all did you accept was
this good are you happy with this are
you satisfied y'all don't accept it y
'all don't allow me to be better next
time see that's how you achieve sincerity but
that means Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala in your
heart is who he is in reality see
Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is the great is
the Almighty is we know whether you believe
that or not whether I believe that I
doesn't make a difference that's who he is
it's just getting the nefs to understand that
that you cannot look and you may not
see me yet to do and do today
and dad and you have borne a home
to hope in there are people who take
associates with the laws about that they love
like Allah and I believe this verse is
talking about yeah you're looking for people you
love the opinion you love the praise of
people more than you love the praise of
Allah he promised you his praise why are
you looking to for the praise of others
it shouldn't matter to you the way to
fix is just be telling is exalting Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala to achieve the class this
is to achieve sincerity but the thing is
sincerity is the most valuable core principle that
you can ever achieve in Islam and it's
a lifelong journey don't stop doing something because
you feel that your intention is not 100
% sincere for a loss about it don't
stop doing it acknowledging that a part of
your intention is is imperfect is good enough
at the beginning it's acknowledging I want to
do this for you but there's a part
of me that's yeah there's some self-interest
in this I'm also hoping to please others
or certain people acknowledging that is being honest
about it is is how you start is
the first step and then slowly as you
move forward before your deeds you take more
time to work on your intention to remind
yourself of the concept we just talked about
of who Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala is and
who people are people are just like you
and I be honest about it to yourself
how powerful are you okay let me talk
about myself I know that I have no
power almost at all I am just as
lost and scared and clumsy and worried about
the future and uncertain as probably more than
everyone else that's who I am if you're
like that know that we're all the same
even those who put on the show somehow
know they have it all figured out and
you know they are in control of things
no one is I guess not as you
have arrogance that you think you're better than
it's just no no no it is Allah
subhanahu wa'ta'ala is the only one so
really what everyone else thinks doesn't matter what
does Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala think figuratively speaking
because Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala you know he's
either satisfied or not you understand what I'm
trying to say and that's how you start
getting rid of the it's a long journey
I've already taken up you know almost an
hour of talk and I had the fourth
disease I wasn't able to talk about so
what we'll do is tomorrow and if everything
works out I'll do a part two to
this and maybe after it after I do
half an hour 40 minutes or so we'll
open any session for Q&A it'll be
it'll be the goal is for it to
be live you can either any type in
the questions or we may be may even
be able to offer a way for you
to call in or to leave a voice
message with a question and that way we
can you know address any any issues that
I wasn't that weren't addressed during the sessions
themselves so that's the plan for tomorrow inshallah
and then down inshallah the goal is that
in the long run we continue to talk
about these things and we and we the
discussion is longer like we take each one
of these diseases and talk about them over
a week or so and just go through
them in detail and give a lot of
examples because a lot of examples you really
learn about these things when you're giving good
examples that's why you need to continue to
educate yourself about this stuff that's one of
the tools reading right I talked about reading
reading as in learning as in gaining experience
and gaining knowledge from people who know how
the nefs works and can give you examples
it can help you deal with the problems
and teach you the concepts that you need
to remember a lot of these diseases go
away once you have proper perspectives once you
convince yourself of certain principles that you live
by that that are sunk in and are
a part of who you are as a
person and that doesn't happen overnight it takes
time I hope that was an official subhanakallah
wa bihamdika shaytan wa la ilaha illa anta
astaghfiruka wa atubu ilayk wa salallahu wasalam wa
baraka ala nabiyyina muhammadin wa ala alihi wa
sahbihi jama'in jazakumullahu khairan wa baraka allahu
feekum assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh