Zakariyya Harnekar – Naseehah Q&A Discussion LGBTQ
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The question is
we're we're discussing a question here.
Let
me just get it to us and start
the class.
And he was
We,
we were just discussing a question
A little bit of a question on
Jumal that he listened to, and he was
speaking about matters related to,
like, LGBT
stuff.
And the question was basically
that
can a person that identifies
if I'm getting it wrong, can a person
that identifies
as one of those things
be engaged
with the understanding
that what they are doing is wrong.
And, I was just basically explaining that,
certainly the person can be engaged.
And you they might not accept
from the premise, from the start of the
discussion
that the action
is wrong.
You want the outcome of them to change.
But the thing is you don't have control
of outcomes.
You're never required to have control of outcomes.
And
all that you are in fact required to
do in that regard is
and then move in my roof and then
you are in your.
Good. But with wisdom. So that's why I
said the important thing is to identify the
source of the problem. Sometimes a person can
have the problem simply because once I once
I had to speak to a a boy
I don't know if I told you guys
about this before. I had to speak to
okay. Also, again, not the small boy. He's
in his teens,
latter teens.
And,
initially,
parents told me he's having doubts about his
Islam.
He's having doubts about Islam.
So
first time I went to him, I went
to meet with him. He was very cool.
He wasn't
opening up much on what his issues were.
In fact, I ended up just playing FIFA
with him.
But then the second time I went,
and then he was like, oh,
really need to speak.
This is the conversation.
And,
initially, I started conversing with him, like, talking
about how to remove the doubts about the
existence of Allah and
also the existence of Allah.
That is where the conversation was going. But,
eventually,
we went to market
a more check somewhere, and they were having
a check.
And then I asked them certain questions. Like,
so what are your thoughts about those things?
What are your thoughts about performance on that?
What are your thoughts? What they told me
no. I don't have any issue with that.
So at some point in the conversation, he
he identified the problem for me.
He told me, you see,
what it is is I think that these
things that's harangued.
Right?
But I want to do them.
And on account of that,
I doubt
Islam. No. But listen to what this boy
said.
If
I think about it in terms of the
the,
you know,
the makeup of the that one more time
speaks about.
And
in light of that, this guy doesn't have
a ugly problem.
He doesn't have a problem. He just has
a.
And when I look at it in light
of other things,
I think in in light of other surrounding
differences,
his lifestyle, etcetera.
That's what the issue is. I don't actually
need to talk to this guy about the
existence of a lot.
He doesn't have a problem with that.
His problem is that he doesn't know how
to restrain his nerves.
In fact, like, so funny.
He actually
he actually asked me, like, if I could
get him to buy weed.
I was like, bro,
your your parents called me.
This one this is you are. You asked
me to go buy it. You already told
me.
There was a there was a other guy
that he was speaking to before
about this you know, you've been a savvy
speaking about him. That's why after the first
time, they didn't initially call me.
Then he told me, oh, no. That other
guy that he was speaking to, like, about
the daily issues, he was a small screen.
And And then I was telling you, also,
what's my perception of me, etcetera. So I
told him, look. It's a drag, and it
has its own. Even if you have good
quality stuff, but can still have, you know,
you can still get dragging new psychosis, and
you can still have all of those
effects and it's awful. And I told him,
no. Most of the time, people laced the
stuff. He told me, no. No. I don't
think my dealer will.
So I asked him, why do you think
that he told me, no. He says, oh,
But,
it's definitely a lot.
It's important to identify
what the problem exists in relation to and
you can solve.
So if any person
struggles with a,
they struggle with a
sin,
no matter what the sin may be, that
can be
LGBT stuff. It could be Xena. It could
be drugs. It could be stealing. It could
be anything.
These
that problem stems from something.
Sometimes it's something that an individual can analyze
if they, you know, know what to be
looking for.
Sometimes it's something that the person needs proficient
offers. That's why we have talked to him.
And, yeah, like, you can sometimes identify this
is a problem with.
There's a problem with.
This is a problem that I can't actually
converse with you about. Maybe you need some
medication.
And,
you know, all of those things are
are to be taken back.
We never
we never think
from Islamic perspective that Allah will create a
person
without the potential
for
for salvation
the potential for salvation. And I think it's
important to understand and it's important to also
recognize
that every person's
taste is different.
Every person's taste is different, but I actually
actually say every person's taste is different.
Not from the perspective of the challenge that
they're facing,
but the account that will be taken from
him is also different.
I I mean,
I always, you know, do a hadith stand
out in my mind
about this? He's the guy that sent his
whole life. He asked his family to kidimate
him.
Why did he want his family to kidimate
him? I him? I think the Mas'uz kept
his ashes on the land and on the
city, the Hadidism.
Why? Because
he
send his whole life, and he doesn't want
to be punished.
Right? So then that is
a worst thing of of anything upon a.
And then
he pauses away. He still doesn't do it.
They can make his body. They scattered his
remains that.
And then,
brings the parts of his body together
and asks him why he did that. And
then he says to all that I was
shy to stand before you, committed,
you know, that life of sin. And then
unless I'm shy to punish you, and then
I'll continue to.
So
you you hear that on one hand,
but in no way does that justify living
a life of sin.
Right? Because there may there may be other
examples of people who lived good lives
or apparently good lives. As I hadith another
hadith mentions, a person does the the the
deeds of the personal gender
for his own life
until he's a hand span away from gender.
And then he does the action of the
people of the outside,
and then an account of that, I think
it's causing to the outside.
So
we must be by no fool for Roger,
but the point is that it's a different.
And problems of
of of this nature,
where people are gonna have confusion about the
identity, where people are gonna have confusion about
the reality, where people are gonna have confusion
about,
you know, the validity or the the objectivity
of things.
It's it's only gonna increase.
And our response to it can't be, okay.
Let me check you in the alpha here.
Let me check everybody in the alfa.
That's not a valid response. It's not a
share it's not what the sharia requires of
us even,
even.
Yes. They will exist in society,
with that group of people that do take
that position. And sometimes, they must
exist
as
a make weight.
On the other side of this girl, there's
a group of people in society that are
completely on the,
you know, on the on the one end
of the spectrum. And then you have some
people on the end of the spectrum that,
you know, balance things out a little bit.
But, generally,
we aim to be
moderate for the kind of service, look for
the salvation of people.
And we do it with
following
the correct aqida,
following the correct,
following the correct aqida, following the correct fit,
but also with the virtue
of.
You can't you can't have the the idea
that I'm gonna impose
the if you're not coming from a place
of.
Otherwise, you're gonna be just handling everything and
you think you're gonna be imposing the, but
you're gonna end up with nothing.
That's why we call it,
call it, call it you know? That is
that is the lifeblood spirit of Islam.
So all of those things has to be
injected into society
through that spirit of ASR, through the spirit
of good world, through the spirit of bringing
in about beauty and all the listeners.
And, I think a lot of the challenges
that we face in society
regarding,
you know, the predominant philosophy in our time
are things that in looking in our growth,
in our legacy, we will find some initial
steps to solving them.
You might not know, but in many of
them, the which is one of the
main
or the second most prominent might have been.
Many of the texts
start with the phrase,
something like that.
Like, different variations of it. The realities of
things are established and fixed.
So it's like they're telling you
before to translate it into,
philosophical terms, they would be saying,
as Muslims,
we are
realist.
And then they'll speak about the Mahia, and
we are essentials,
like, from from a philosophical,
perspective.
And then if you unpack that and understand
that,
then
and that makes sense to you and you
can convert somebody of that,
then you'll see the absurdity of
somebody
white identifying as a black man
or somebody
identifying as something that they are really not
because reality has value and it has new.
So, you know, those
are conversations that we might have to have
more and
and there's a conversation that we'll be the
first ones having that's been added in new
industry. We must really learn and
know the source of the issues and then
and then tackle.
So to me, when I went to have
discussion with that guy who decided he's
a female
or woman, whatever the case was,
I didn't even start by talking about it.
I'm not even
bothered to talk to this guy about it
at the moment
because it's really a problem that he thinks
that he has the right to define his
reality based on
his thought.
So let's talk about the reality first.
Yeah. Then perhaps
if we can come to some agreement
on the terms of our engagement and our
discussion,
that we can say, okay. Look. Is there
any I mean, if I engage in a
conversation and say, is there anything
that I can say
that you are bound to, things that we
are clear upon,
you know, that we can bind each other
doing the discussion.
Because if we if we are in such
things,
then having a discussion is in the future.
So let's get to that point where there
are certain things we can we can achieve.
And, generally,
for me, I mean, depending on,
this is something that we assist all the
time.
But
the most important reality
is all.
If you want objectivity, worldview, and all of
those things, I'll start with all.
If you want model objectivity, I start with
all.
All that is.
You can you cannot be a Muslim and
have an anti realist worldview because
there's one essential
reality
truth that you would have to accept. It's
not relative. It's not dependent on your perception.
It's not dependent on your thoughts. It's not
dependent on your feelings. It's not dependent on
anything else. It is.
That's all.
And that's why I used to ever thought
that, actually, the more and more we're getting
into this postmodern era,
the more and more we're getting into it,
that's extremely awful and chaotic for society.
But at the same time, there's a silver
lining
that the choice between all or nothing becomes
easier to make.
And I think people still have the inherent
recognition
that, you know what?
It is reality.
Things are
You might
get people who study philosophy and stuff like
that who will tell you, okay. I'm a
anti realist,
or I believe everything to be completely negative.
But if you go to a normal person,
you ask him,
like,
is there reality?
They'll tell you yes.
And you I mean and if you tell
them all, but if you think like this,
then the only way you can justifiably do
that is if you accept that there's no
reality.
Then they will perhaps be able to see
the absurdity of their position.
So
yeah.
Of course.
But we that will that has to be
informed and why is that?
It has to
be
that
that
that aims at creating the very core of
these problems.
What's the age of the person?
What's the age of the person? He's a
young guy.
So I can say he doesn't know his
audience.
Perhaps.
Because the bulk of the people may not
be trying to.
Mhmm. Let's say, they're calling.
So it's a look. It's increasing
for some reason, I don't know. We on
earth, I fell into this thing, but, like,
people ask me to come
speak to the age children and stuff, and
I'm telling you, like,
a
lot over the past. I don't think it's
a.
You're still on? It's a good.
I
think the general
Yeah.
So maybe you want
you made a choice. You need to be
the leader that you
At school now.
Because I'm it's it's it's like part of
it's like part of what the kids learn
at school. Yes. I want I want the
teachers at Islamic
at Islamic.
She teaches.
In her class, she said that homosexuality
is halal.
And the girls want to have a petition
against her. I think they actually did.
And I'm not saying this to bash Islam
here. I'm just saying that,
that that's so pervasive in society
that,
like,
there's likely I mean, a generation of beyond
of me, they can think to themselves, okay.
Now we're learning so with people, accept realities,
but, really, like,
it's actually really pervasive in society. Youngsters,
most of them,
they have some crazy ideas.
If not secular humanistic ideas, then, like, we
think it religion doesn't matter. Like,
most most youth that I engage,
they won't see the problem for somebody to
reject a lot as long as they're a
good person.
Like, from good actually, almost all the people
that I spoke to about this come from
good Muslim homes.
But at least, like, what we'll consider the
normal
Muslim home. I'm not talking about people,
you know, of the families, Christians, so they
might have a emotional
reason for not wanting to accept such kind
of thought or anything like that. Like, just
from a
normal middle class Muslim.
1 guy even had to speak that became
a atheist.
That guy
used to lead him to our headcounts 2
and a half, 2 and a half.
He used to take the guys to to
fight him in the movie.
He's not even from, Madhu. He's from a
conservative,
And it's tax. It's so much on their
eyes like you'd say.
So only issue is
it's not that the only options people have
is, you know, buying into nothing or Islam.
There are other avenues.
And there was one article
I think the article's in Yahoo.
Economy movement, but it might have been as
well probably,
who argued that
based on a book that was written in
2015, and I think this is the name
of the book,
that
the religion
that youth are buying into, the philosophy that
that youth are buying into because atheism is
very unsatisfying.
Right? It's it's it's very, very unsatisfying.
Like, well, it should lead you to regression
itself. Mhmm.
Is
a
morally therapeutic day is
And
that's basically, like, people
believing in something,
but they're not accepting a revelation
in terms of the
sources of knowledge.
But it gives them the idea that there
is something
such as goodness and badness that we have
to adhere to. It's really naturalistic, very irrational.
But, you know, from our Islamic perspective, what
you think is irrational is not necessarily irrational.
Rationality
has a very,
defined scope.
And
if you don't learn about what's the correct
usage of rationality,
you can be thinking that something is irrational,
but it's actually how I'm speaking.
So you need to, you know, you need
to be able to discern.
And those types of discussions,
our legacy
is in abundance.
We have the.
We have the. We have the. They all
engage in discussions with respect.
So it's a difficult job. We have to
lead stuff and,
yeah,
think about the stuff we've done. But
it's stuff we have to deal with. We
can't shy away from it. We can't,
and and and we certainly
cannot get a response. We track everybody now
by it.
So I don't know what but I'll just
say, but, likely,
I'm okay.
But,
yeah.
We're wet.
I'm just
I think we can
skip on and see how for today, shall
we?
And just look at the now.
We don't have any
project taken into it.
There's just one thing I wanted to mention
to you in relation to the now.
So,
we're not gonna do a new concept in,
but this is one thing I wanted to
focus on.
Look. Okay. That's a discussion I can just
talk over then.
Is there any input from
you guys on
on this issue?
Online, you're welcome to.
No. No. Just in terms of what I
see now.
I think it's a it's
a a great need that needs to be
open and transparent.
Because a lot of times,
cultures, it's, you know, keep under the
because they need all people to say that
it's in the body lies. There's something that
are underlying truth, but it should be.
So it's it's it's good that it happens.
I think our problem is that
I think we've been slow to react to
it.
I know of schools where it's like, you
know, it's almost like part of the idea
of schools that you have to be pretty
good.
LGBTQ
is there's no
single gender toilets. These or no toilets or
schools that it's male, female. So it's all
one way especially at that at that age
group, you know, you can rewatch
into acceptance. And I think it's very important
that we realize that it's not something that
should be accepted.
Yeah. Of course. In our community to people.
Like,
my my my brother is a teacher at,
South High School.
South High School is not a model school.
It's not like a school for a middle
privilege.
But even he told me they had a
meeting, a staff meeting
about this, having gender
neutral toilets.
Well, there wasn't actually changing neutral tourists. There's
more
there's more having transgendered toilets.
And
the school is like of Muslim people,
Principal
Muslim. The next in line that's likely to
be a principal
okay. I would say I can't say it.
But
other prominent teachers in the school are also
Muslim.
There's a lot of Muslim students there.
But the principal told him, actually, there's actually
nothing we can do about
it. There's nothing we can do to,
like,
stop it
if,
you know,
if
it's pushed all enough by
the powers it be. If you look at
those international, I think it's
it would be all all to be,
in the cards.
Yes. Yes. Used to be able to, you
know, software just for this program. And
We're finding We're finding We're finding that. But
there's also, like, so much of condemnation towards
it.
Yes.
Yeah. Yeah. I know. It's just it's it's
crazy.
And,
was he again, he was like, just read
this, but just know that this is what
you're supposed to write. Mhmm. This is not
my views. So this is like according to
the kids. Mhmm.
But yeah. Okay. That's what I mean, it's
problematic that kids are expected to espouse lose
that they don't know cognitive dissonances and stuff
like that. But
yeah. That's why I'm thinking. I don't know
if I'm gonna send my kid to school
even. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know
what I'm still figuring out. I'm just doing
it.
I live
in.
Yeah.
I think that
the school situation,
it's like,
you know, like, that that sort of dialogue
with children at the very early age, and
they're not yet to decide each year about
morality and what's acceptable and what's not.
Yeah. Yeah. I know it's it's
you know, even
yesterday was
a a year since when Nata passed away.
And when Nata was immersed, like, in
his focus on his efforts were primarily on
Hadith and on.
He was a polymath, so he was like
a super good in
a a large variety of subjects.
But,
like, in the latter part of his life,
even he, like, changed his focus a lot
to matters about data and stuff like that
because
that's where the problems of our timeline.
It's it's crazy.
But sometimes I actually sit and I just
think, yo,
the world is bonkers.
Like
yeah.
That's like there's no
it's not.
Yeah. I mean, I'm I'm still quite
young.
I mean, it wasn't
now
what I mean is, like, I was at
school,
like, maybe
13 years ago.
And, like, what the
what the situation was at school 13 years
ago to what it is now, it's just
like
world support.
And that rapid change is
is the interest because
we have to have a rapid production of
responses also.
And the things that is
yeah. It was simple. Mhmm. But now it's
changing. Like, you know, a person's identity.
Yeah. But Christians or Christian value.
I was at this field so we was
with
you saying the the voice being
that's really.
Like, we don't believe in bullying or anything
like that. But it was still I could
feel the.
Maybe
And I think also, you know, one of
the
one of the subtle things that create a
bigger problem or that or effective in their
course is that they
use
things
that
are laden with positive connotations
to like,
I'm so I'm scared with my kid to
watch something with the rainbows
in.
Just because
just because he's going to associate
rainbows with goodness,
and then he goes into society and the
rainbows are associated with all types of other
things.
My brother-in-law was in was in Germany. He
went to soccer match the other day. He
sends a photo of the stadium.
The whole stadium by Munich Stadium is
in the rainbow.
Right? He seems to know, look up to
the stadium.
But,
yeah, it's all it's all of the placements.
Occupying the accusation
occupying positions
of power in terms of ideas.
I mean, it might be all of those
types of benefit, but, also, if you occupy
positions of of of ideological power, then you
can impose it even if you're a smaller
So
Islam, you know, sexuality is pretty much the
goal for, like, really even if you get
into reading anything like that. But,
that that's how it's actually
decentralized mass media to the idea and then
we're leading to users that it's actually,
you know, the champions people. They are all
part of us.
He's a stand up comedian.
He could say he could say anything. He
could accept. But he said
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it became.
But
what is I think you know?
I was thinking of
the idea of using positive symbols, like
In the book itself. A good life.
Yeah.
But but you can just say rainbow. It's
like, how do you how do you strip
away
the wonder of a rainbow?
And,
the other word as well, like,
progressivism.
If somebody asked you, are you progressive? You'd
want to say yes. I'm progressive because, like,
what am I gonna say? I'm backward.
But when you we you know, when you
understand the connotations of what that means in
a philosophical sense, then as a Muslim,
no. I actually believe that the gold standard
of morality existed 1400 years ago or more.
I don't believe that the further forward we
go in society, the more modern advanced we
we we we we we we can become.
In fact, I think that society needs to
revert
to that. Does that make me backward?
No.
I think it's it's it's actually international advancement
that allows you to recognize that. But
just the immediate response of somebody if you're
having a conversation with them and you ask
them, are you good at guessing? That's, of
course, a good at guessing,
not backwards.
But, you know, all of those
using of words or symbols connected with positive,
connotations
and then loading them with meanings,
but don't have to get into them.
It's very, it's it's it's very damaging to
society. So I don't know how that gets
combated or what.
Yeah.
I'm not gonna lie to you. And even
in my last thoughts, I'm gonna be sitting
in the fifties all thinking about this stuff.
But, yeah,
anything else?
I I honestly think that and I and
I had many discussions with Mona and I
about this as well as well as I
was calling that, especially for youth
that are coming to university.
And increasingly, the need is the same for
high schools
is that
youth need to
have some kind of
prep course
regarding these ideas. Because in my experience, most
youth that go to university,
they don't
not get affected by these things on account
of the strength of the argument.
That's more
that's more on account of the deep rootedness
of their faith.
So
they sell deeply Muslim. I'm gonna take a
note.
They're so deep rooted. The Islamists are deep
rooted. They they
rooted in Islamic culture. Their family is Muslim,
whatever. So they push all of those things
out of the
out of the mind. That kind of defense
in a sense.
And then they come out of university, and
they still have the same circle, and they
carry on a flight.
And very few of those that can actually
engage in a conversation
and get that bad
on a on a intellectual level.
So
I think there's a great need for having,
like, prep courses for people. Because, I mean,
even if you study
engineering,
you're probably gonna have some course in ethics,
in which
that's dependent on the lecturer or whether he
wants to engage in questions of,
predestination
and all of those things. So it's
I mean, many
many university students
will contact me. Tell me, look here.
How can it be that, that Allah,
you know, will believe in Takdir,
But, then it's a lot of just
why
didn't you know this enough for the schools
that I'm doing?
But when you're doing engineering
yeah. But they have to do these ethics
course. And they engage in discussions. They don't
care about the they would carry on with
life as normal as they do. They weren't
forced to engage in the in the in
the thing. But for many of them, it
actually
it actually
creates a moment of vulnerability. And in that
moment of vulnerability, you can,
you know, alter the ideas.
So yeah. The
Sure. Could I could I ask a question?
Okay, Nana. Just just one moment. Somebody in
the class wanted to say something, and then,
we'll take,
Nana's question.
No.
The the question is, is there a way
that we can,
you know, make the content of the Quran
that is unchanging, more accessible
to to the youth?
I think they definitely
you know, one of the things that some
somebody
who has the expertise may be better placed
to do is perhaps look at different,
you know, theories of cognitive development
and then identify for different age groups the,
you know,
the modes of learning
and then see what content is appropriate and
what mode or what
vehicle
means of conveyance
is suitable for that type of content.
And then we think about
syllabi or,
you know, pedagogies that actually enable us to
to access youth in those ways. I mean,
I'm not a educational theorist or anything like
that, so I don't,
read about all
of these people all the time.
I mean, maybe I just
read something on it now and then. I
don't know why even. But,
like, people that the ensuring that there's a
wholesome and a holistic Muslim society is the
responsibility of every Muslim. It's not the responsibility
of a certain group of people.
So people with all types of expertise need
to put their heads together
and see how
that information or the expertise can be used
beneficially. So people that are in education that
know about those things
should come together with perhaps scholars, etcetera,
to look at, you
know, creating pedagogies that that do that. And
there are there are secrets like that,
that exist.
There was this,
was
it,
funds?
They were publishing some stuff on,
work, but for children.
So there are there are efforts like that,
food, and I think we need to
invest more in there and,
both financially and in terms of, like I
think it's actually happens a lot. In
how
it happens a lot.
Yeah.
Could I just,
make a comment?
We are missing
missing out on the comments and the questions
from the floor. So could you just briefly
repeat it before you respond to them? Thank
you.
Okay. Sure. Sure. No problem. And, and what
was Nana's question?
Nana, was that the question as well?
Okay.
So the the comment we're dealing with is,
you know, since the content of the Quran
is unchanging,
are there ways in which we can, you
know,
make the content of the Quran more accessible
to the youth?
And so that's what we were talking about
now.
And
I think one thing that we also mustn't
do is we mustn't underestimate the capacity of
votes,
especially once they're into the 18 year, especially
in the latter teen years. Oftentimes, they can
actually,
engage with the content of the Quran as
it is.
Maybe we just need to
adapt the language and stuff like that. Like,
I don't know once.
I working with, MSR High Schools,
and we had to talk to, like, a
1000 high school,
youngsters.
And we were not thinking that's how's to
care what the * are we gonna do
here. We got a 1,000 people to come,
but I think we got him to come
off for each. I have pizzas.
So,
I don't know. We had to speak to
them. And then what I did was, I
just got one of my cousins. I told
him, okay.
What are the words you people use nowadays?
I remember at that time, it was lit,
low key,
high key,
and,
like so I call some other stuff fam
so I'm a say fam more than like,
squad girls. I just said
like, I
no. I'm serious. So I just said to
my cousin, and I told him to get
down with all these words. And then I
just used that words in,
like, human talk, and they could relate to
it. The content was, like, the same.
Yeah.
So what they're doing with the.
For example, in somebody, they have it
in the.
Just do 1, 2, 3, and then
And then at home, you must sit with
your family
and 123 are.
And in that way,
from page 1, 2 page, whatever in the
book,
we would have covered that from
as soon as they understand from age 5
years old, till they're 15
or until they leave high school. Yeah. So
if you constantly do that,
you could call
it,
what do you call it?
Or you could call it indoctrination.
Darling.
And I keep on saying this to some
of my friends and colleagues
that one of the most
successful massages in Cape Town
is
a Portland's Masjid, which,
Brian Gray did it.
The night that I went there, the Saturday
night.
A hadith or what or you'll use even
a
at the person's house before they leave with
with some advice.
With himself, he said in that on the
Saturday evening,
for it would be 3 quarters.
And that's it's now for each other.
So that tells me
that because of the effort and the figure
that it has for its community,
but he's and I pulled this out in
each one of the successful designs.
Even on a Thursday, they they have got
and it's
full of youth.
Yes. So this is what I'm saying is
that every night,
the imam
must speak.
And you find that those imams
that do not do this, this
is very, very good.
You see? And now with COVID,
there are some of our males that do
not want to go to Jumai even.
And it has broken that's allowed
because now people feel, I don't need to
go to the mosque.
You know, the mosque is not on them.
There's no social distancing. There's no masks.
You go to square in Masjid,
social distancing, they get to sanitize it, but
they still have the mask.
You see? So
it is up to the family then,
the
father figure in the house or the mother
to sit with the child, with the children,
with the.
And
I came to a stage where I let
the children meet now when they were bigger.
And they would be the,
and they would
not know the next word. And after telling
the word, we'll have to and they tell
me how do you know it. Mhmm. But
that must be. So
this is another way of
trying to
inoculate
the use of the. I think that's that's
really important. So the comment was so those
are and the comment was that one of
the things that we should institute
are, like, practices like
that have existed in various groupings like the,
We you have that takes place in the
spreadsheet, and then you have that takes place
at home.
We just maybe once a day, there's a
hadith, they're together, etcetera. I think that's really,
really important then.
But also serves as a platform for discussion.
We you know,
oftentimes, people are so busy. Parents are so
busy. Kids are so busy. It's not like
they're really busy, but nowadays, they're kicking. They're
really busy all the time because they have
their phone and stuff. And even parents, it's
the same
that you don't actually ever know what the
kids are engaging with or what they're dealing
with because of the fact that you don't
have a platform for discussion.
So when you actually have that institution in
your house, we care this time. We're gonna
sit. We're gonna read this thing. We're gonna
talk about it.
That is a very definitely very effective thing.
Another another
model very similar to that,
is the
the model of the helicopter
model of the where people get together.
They read some Quran, read some hadith, read
something from books that will be official, and
then they discuss it.
Also very important. I also heard this this
entire.
They are they are at the stage where
the media and.
Yes. They are on that stage of it.
Yeah. And a lot of things in the
is actually.
Yes.
Yes. Yes.
Not just this. But you cannot have nothing.
Yes. This is my fault.
No. I I can certainly I mean, we
invest
a super lot
in our children's,
yeah, secular
education. I mean, I'm not so comfortable calling
it secular, but
in that part of the education,
and we are oftentimes really negligent in relation
to the
Just Islamic education, and it's totally metal chosen.
So just Friday, you know, I was saying
that,
complaint.
Say, Momo can do this to you and
keep you and all that.
But that's Momo cannot keep you, but the
mother told them that Momo can keep you.
Right?
And then she then had to address to
them what I told you not gonna get
ugly pictures. It's a.
So this is the kind of thing that
it tells you that the age of 3
is already exposed.
So we don't have a tally in all
other good stuff. I'm telling you.
Yeah.
Yeah. I know phones are.
I mean, we need them in a society,
and there's a lot of good that can
be derived from. But children, I don't
children
must have touch phones.
They can they must be very, very controlled.
Look here, I know it's the easiest specify.
It's like a new age dummy,
but
but,
what I actually what I actually recommend parents
do, especially,
Is it? That's a problem. What is it?
What? What? What?
No. But sometimes the stuff pop up on
their YouTube feeds and things.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. What do what I think parents
must do is
even even for even for, like,
young adults or so.
Okay. I know all about respecting policy and
stuff like it.
Nah. You
that must be if you
won't let me go through your phone,
go to your phone.
Obviously, it comes at age where you have
to
just trust them and make the work, but,
but it's very important, especially youth. Youngsters,
they have access to too much. I actually
say now and I I recommended this in
my Friday to 1
because it's gonna be youth day now. Everybody's
gonna speak about the youth and what the
youth must be doing. But it's not about
what the youth do. They're just an inflection
of the society.
I,
recommend
that parents
must not allow their children access
to phones in general.
Right? If you want to allow them to
watch something, then you must put it on,
and then, you know, they mustn't touch the
phone.
And there's voice that you can control that
you can interrupt this type of YouTube. I
don't know if it's legal. It's not legal.
Just don't drop anybody as in it. Right?
But for the well-being of
the society,
you download the stuff.
Add up this stuff.
Put it in a playlist that the child
cannot click on anything other than things that
you have already vetted,
that you know it's safe, that has it
represents good moral values,
that,
you know, there's a good lesson in there.
And then
you can allow the child some degree of
access to it. I'm not saying you must,
you know, become Amish people or anything like
that, but,
like,
you wouldn't give your child a laugh to
play with. Why would you give something that's
gonna catch up the, you know, the ideas?
So
that's what I strongly feel about YouTube. I
mean, I tried with my kid. I tell
him, okay. Here's a phone. Don't touch.
He touches it every single time.
Yeah. The flash app ads,
all of those
things.
But,
there are ways you get around that is
I don't mean
that
of Quran
while we're talking about YouTube and apps, but
there's an app actually called YouTube Vanced.
YouTube Vanced,
and, there's some features that, like, are actually
quite beneficial that you can lock your phone
while you're watching something.
So
the channel won't be able to
there's a button, and there's no there's no
ads on there also.
Cancel all the ads and stuff.
So,
we also need to update ourselves. Kids are
getting updated with and and sometimes I speak
about kids, but the problem problem applies is
I will speak to from children, tall,
you know, young professionals, even beyond that, people
are grappling with these problems.
And, yeah,
these apps that you can download to monitor
screen on time on your phone.
And, and and, you know, empowering ourselves with
what all of those things are that are
available to us is very important,
in the society.
But it's becoming also as I say, you
know, there's other problems are becoming increasingly prevalent.
What's also becoming increase increasingly prevalent
is that people are living
by and large online lives.
Like, I know youth that literally
spend their whole day online.
Their friends, they who they consider their new
friends are all online.
I mean,
because they play they do online game. So
on on the online game, they sometimes have,
and they're speaking to other people or they're
typing up and,
they're chatting.
But, I mean, I actually spoke to a
few youth.
I asked him, like, I asked him, like,
who are your friends?
And he told me, I don't have any
friends. All my friends are overseas.
So,
actually, a a cousin of mine now, close
a first cousin of mine, he's like, during
COVID, his accent changed.
So I was
like, I'm not joking. I'm not but
but actually, it's for me to really see
this.
Right?
His accent changed are are awesome. Like,
What's
going on?
Really, it's nice because of all the people
he speaks on. So
he speaks like
and
and and then I was engaging. He was
talking about, like, new friends. Who's your friends
here? What you do?
Now all of he told me all of
his closely. He doesn't have any friends. He
asked you now, what about your friends at
school? He told me I talked to some
people. Yeah. Neighbors. Like, don't you do anything
with them when you go out to them?
Don't you? No.
All my friends are. So
I'll just spend time with them. I spend
time with one hand.
That's a it seems like a laughable thing,
but it's a v it's becoming very common.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But, I think just in in conclusion I
mean, I don't have all the solutions to
all these problems. I don't think,
anybody has all of them. But some things
we need to focus on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
In another shopping.
They become complacent with that.
And I I mean, I actually asked the
customer, like, who hugs you when you're sad?
Like, if you
if you
if all your friends are online,
and you're not talking much to the people
in your house,
like,
how do
you have those needs to form in that?
Yeah.
But,
I think,
not highlighting the problems is not enough. We
need to look for solutions, and I think
some of the solutions
some some things require simple solutions.
Like I mentioned, just limiting access
to, you know, to online life.
Even with the younger adults, you can have
a TV. You can play games, but you
play the front room.
I think also, it'll be it'll be close
circles Yeah. For as long as possible.
Hopefully by then, we don't only can you
give me too hard as well? Yeah. We've
done the 50 15 15 for
as long in so that when you get
to that so they are going to get
get you exposed to that
to be able to. Yeah.
So insulating children for a while until they're
able to deal with,
things on their own.
And then
I also think we we I think it's
something.
Yeah. No. That's it. That that I agree.
Sometimes
sometimes
the solutions are
it is working to very simple things that
are some advice.
So Angela
forces you to meet people, meet people, talk
to people, get out of that,
that bubble. It is You're all like minded
on certain parts. Like minded people on a
certain part. There's accountability when you're in a
community.
But, you know, as I think, we're talking
to same conclusion.
And I think, you know, maybe this is
why I was actually thinking
as
well. Teaching subjects like academia,
and,
know, fit and discovering what is real, what
exists real,
how it applies to our society, all of
us. And so in short, I think that
education
is
becoming more and more important.
Our time is up.
And I know we didn't do
any of the subjects we were supposed to
do.
But
may this
be a may this be a,
discussion that gets us thinking about solutions.
And then if you have any solutions in
relation to anything, share it with everybody else,
and
I think it can be beneficial.
So anyway for now.