Yasmin Mogahed – Purposeless Pain Or Painful Purpose

			Santa Monica, you're listening to serenity. And I'm assuming
		

			you're, um, thank you for being patient. And we were having a little bit of technical difficulties,
but hamdulillah you know, inshallah Good things come to those who ate and Tila. Today, we're going
to be discussing, tackling and shala a topic, which we all inevitably will face at some point in our
life. And it's the concept of pain. It's the concept of what is, you know, the purpose of pain is
does pain have a purpose, and if so, what is the purpose, and also about coping with pain and and i
think that once we understand, and I think that so much of how we cope with the things in our lives,
so much of it has to do with perspective and understanding the purpose behind why certain things
		

			might happen, or why we encounter certain things in our life. And, in talking about the concept of
pain, I think it's important to note that we have to unlearn a lot of what we are taught in society.
Basically, society teaches you that you're never supposed to feel any amount of pain. In fact,
society teaches you that you're supposed to constantly be in a heightened state of bliss. And the
reason for this is it comes from a very
		

			God sort of, you know, God is taken out of the picture, the Hereafter is taken out of the picture,
it's a very world world dunya centered paradigm. And what that means is that you if you believe that
this life is all you have, if you believe that, you know, this is the only chance you're going to
get to experience happiness to get the things that you want to reach success, then you're going to
want to maximize, you know, pleasure or happiness in quotation marks, because the definition of
happiness, of course, becomes limited to worldly or physical happiness or material happiness. But
the idea is, and the whole problem, this this problematic concept, it comes from the the, the the
		

			mistake in that you believe that this is kind of this is all we have. And so, because that is the
root of this of this concept. As a result, the the the messages that you should never have to feel
any amount of pain, and any amount of anything less than, you know, Ultimate Bliss and happiness.
And if you do, you need to sedate yourself, you need to distract yourself, you need to take a pill,
you need to use somehow, you need to sort of just treat it treat. And this is where it's very
important, you need to treat the symptoms. So, you know, if someone comes in, and, you know, someone
comes to a doctor and tells him, you know, I've been kind of down about this or that that I'm
		

			dealing with. And again, this isn't to say that there is no such thing as clinical depression,
there's definitely, you know, situations where, you know, pain can become completely paralyzing. And
obviously, there are clinical cases, but just the whole idea of that you're never supposed to be
sad, or anything less than happy all the time, and you know, and that you're never supposed to feel
any pain. And if you do take a painkiller, you know, if you do take an antidepressant, the idea here
is that pain is not part of the norm. And it never should be the case. And the reason why this is
problematic, is that everything that we have every emotion that we're given, is, is given to us with
		

			a particular purpose. Now, of course, the problem comes when it goes to one extreme or another, for
example, the the emotion of anger is not without a purpose, Allah subhanaw taala gave us this
emotion for a particular purpose and, and it's intended for a positive purpose. So, for example,
		

			this this, this emotion might prevent you from being abused or taken advantage of or it will, it
will motivate you to get out of situations perhaps or try to change situations which are unjust. And
so in that sense that anger can be a motivator for good. But at the same time, if that anger is out
of proportion, or rather the anger controls me instead of me controlling the anger, then that's when
you have a problem. And it's the same thing with sadness. It's the same thing with pain. So the pain
itself and I'll use a physical example, if I am, you know, standing Sam standing close to a flame of
some sort, you know, I'm by the stove or something.
		

			I turn around and maybe like, part of my my elbow or something, it kind of touches the flame or gets
close to the heat. What What is it that makes me and I'm not looking, I'm not aware of it, because
I've turned my back, what is the thing that makes me remove my arm is the pain is the fact that that
that fire creates pain on my skin and my pain receptors tell me to move my arm. And so in this, this
is in this sense the pain is is a protective measure that Allah subhanaw taala gives me to tell me
there's a problem, you need to make a change. And it's exactly the same thing with emotional pain.
And, and, and and with psychological pain. That, that yes, if I am feeling pain, rather than just
		

			trying to numb it, I need to figure out what it's telling me. I need to figure out what is it that I
need to be changing because the pain is there for a reason, the sadness or the you know that that
sting that I feel is there to show me it's an indicator to something that's wrong. It's an indicator
to a change that I need to make. And you know, Allah subhanaw taala tells us for example, in the
law, hello yoga euro mabille Coleman, how dare you hire maybe and foresee him that Allah subhanaw
taala never changes the condition of a people until they first change the condition of what is
inside themselves until they change what is inside themselves. And so if there's something painful
		

			about my condition, there's something painful about myself about, you know what I'm the state that
I'm in, it is a motivator to make me change internally, it's an indicator that there's a problem
that there's something missing, or there's some change that I need to make, in the same way that the
pain of the of the fire is what makes me remove my arm. And you think about situations where that
pain isn't there. For example, sometimes with diabetics, because of the diabetes that numbs you
know, like, for example, a lot of times in their feet, that they won't feel,
		

			you know, if they get hurt a they won't be able to feel it. And actually what happens as a result,
what can happen as a result of this numbness is that the that the limb itself or wherever the injury
happens can become so infected, that it actually has to be amputated. And and so the idea here is
that because they don't have those receptors, they've numbed it so much, they don't realize there's
a problem that needs to be treated. And it's it's exactly the same thing. In in our spiritual life.
It's exactly the same thing, at an emotional level. If if we, for example, we our our natural, our
natural inclination, is to want to recognize Allah subhanaw taala, it's, we every human being has
		

			the natural fitrah, the natural fitrah of the human being, is to is to recognize,
		

			you know, to hate it's, it's, it's the, it's to recognize and want to be close to one God to the one
God. And this is the God of all, you know, all humanity. And And the idea here is that this is
already in our nature and Allah subhanaw taala tells us in the Quran, for example, that before we
came into this, you know, this form of existence, Allah subhanaw taala took a covenant with us,
Allah subhanaw taala said, Unless to better become, Am I not your Lord, and all of humanity, not
just Muslims, but all of humanity responded and said Belisha hidden, that indeed, and we we bear
witness to this. So we have within us this covenant that we've made with God, that we realize that
		

			he is our Lord. And so this is our natural fifth row, this is our human nature that is already in
us. What happens is, when we move away from that nature, when we move away from God, it creates a
pain because we're moving away from our own nature, it creates a sense of, of pain and emptiness,
and sadness. And so we can respond to this pain in one of two ways. One is we can look at it and
say, why is this happening? Why am I feeling empty and try to search for answers and try to and try
to make the pain should be, you know, directing us towards the tail hate of Allah subhanaw taala
but, but the other option, which is what most people end up doing, is you try to treat the pain
		

			rather than treat the cause. You try to numb the pain you try to distract yourself. So that's why we
jump from you know, from one thing to another, trying to fill this hole trying to, you know, just
just make me not have to feel anything, even if I don't have to feel anything. It's better than
having to feel this. Me
		

			penis and this, this hole, and and therefore have to figure out how do I treat it. And so what we do
is we go through our lives running after one, one thing after another, whether it's, you know, we
throw ourselves into things and we seek, you know, we seek things in this dunya we seek other people
we seek, you know, our jobs, our careers, we, you know, music, alcohol, drugs, all these things are
just trying to do one thing, and that is filled this empty hole. And that hole that's there is there
because we've moved away from our, our spiritual roots, which is our nature to be close to our
Creator. And as a result of that, it's like we're, we're trying, we numb the pain. And so what
		

			happens when we numb the pain is that that emptiness eats at us more and more, and it's kind of,
it's like that, it's like that infection, it just grows and grows and grows, until, you know, the
heart itself can become, you know, so sick that that eventually it becomes just dead. And so we talk
now about hearts which are dead. These are the hearts that they don't, you know, they're so you
know, they've been so alienated from their, from their own nature of being of near their Creator,
that they don't even notice it anymore. It's just you're, you kind of become like, it's it's a
person who's walking around. And it seems like they're alive but all but actually they're dead. And
		

			that's because the heart is dead and because it doesn't have that which which gives a heart life and
that is nearness to Allah subhana wa Tada. And I just want to show before the break, give you this,
this example which is Hanalei, it came right you know, right at the right time, it was just
yesterday, I was having a Holika and one of the sisters she shared this actually, this is a true
story. And she she sent me the news article, she said that there was a guy and he came to the
dentist because he was having pain in his in his tooth. And he went to the dentist in the dentist
told him you have an infection. And so you need antibiotics and painkiller you know, pain painkiller
		

			to you know, help you deal with the pain, but antibiotics to actually cure the, you know, the the
original problem the root cause, well, the guy did not have enough money to buy both. And so we had
to choose, you had to choose either the antibiotic, or the painkiller, and he chose the painkiller.
So he chose, okay, I just don't want to deal with this pain, I'm going to choose that over actually
curing the the actual sickness, and the man actually ended up dying as a result of the infection.
And this is a true story. So as Paula I just I felt like this was, you know, this is so it's a deep
story. Because really, you know, at a, at a spiritual level, this is what a lot of us do. inshallah,
		

			we'll take a quick break now. And when we return, we'll continue talking about pain and its purpose.
		

			Salam Alaikum This is yes, Ninja hit and you're listening to serenity streaming live on one legacy
radio, we're speaking today about the topic and the concept of pain and, you know, is pain,
something that's has a purpose or is pain, just something that we you know, it's these stumbling
blocks that we have to sort of just get out of the way in order to enjoy our life and, you know, get
on with our, with our life. And I and I, and I really want to emphasize and what we've been talking
about this, you know, thus far is is that we really have to do a lot of unlearning of the concepts
that we have grown up with in this society and basically just humanity, you know, has this concept
		

			in is that because this, you know, a lot of, you know, the the paradigm of this being our only life,
it leads to the idea that we should never have to encounter pain. And it really comes from this
concept of this life having to be a paradise. Um, if you think and you reflect on the Hadith of the
Prophet, so I send them who says that, that this life is a paradise for the disbeliever and is a
prison for the believer. And spatola this, this hadith is is is so profound, and I think a lot of
times we, we might misunderstand or limit, you know, the the meaning of the Hadeeth as being you
know, we think like when we're kids, you know, our parents tell us everything is how long how long,
		

			how long
		

			Right. And so we think we grew up with this concept that, okay, if we're going to be Muslim, then
everything is hom, and you know, the non Muslims get to have all the fun, but you know, we'll just
going to deal with this, and then we get our fun in the hereafter. And I think that, that, that
that's kind of the concept that we get, you know, and maybe this is even the way that that some
people interpret this Hadith, but Subhan Allah, I think that the, the meaning of this hadith is like
really so much deeper. And, and it's really, that, first of all, the idea that, that, you know, as a
believer, that means that your life is going to be harder than than disbelievers. Or that, you know,
		

			you just can't have all the fun and everyone else can, is completely wrong. The the true and this is
what we know from both experience. And Allah subhanaw taala tells us this, the true happiness, the
true enjoyment, the true, really like, contentment, of the heart, internal happiness, can only come
if you're a believer, and can only come through that relationship with our Creator, that, that the
physical, I, you know, is sort of, you know, external type of pleasure or happiness isn't, isn't the
real thing, that you can have all of this so called fun and all this, you know, all these these
things, but internally, you still feel that emptiness. And internally, you still don't feel happy.
		

			And I mean, there's nobody can can claim that, you know, having money and status and, you know, lots
of, you know, being able to do whatever you want, and that that isn't what buys happiness, happiness
is something at an internal level that, you know, can only come and Allah subhanaw taala tells us
this can come through the the remembrance of Allah subhanaw taala the nearness to God. And so it's
actually very opposite, where, you know, the idea is completely wrong, that they get to have all you
know, all the happiness and we just have to suffer it's it's really the other way around. That you
know, love for Allah subhanaw taala says, for example, in the Koran, that whoever turns away from
		

			the remembrance of God, we will that for that person is a is a life that's narrowed down a life
that's sort of it doesn't it, it's it's sometimes Translated by you shuts them down guys with the
ISS, then all sudden decrease in Allahumma Ashtanga that whoever turns away from my remembrance for
them is a life that's narrow or miserable. So it's actually you know, the true happiness is through
an only through the nearness and remembrance of Allah subhanho data. So that isn't, you know, with a
message that the that we're getting from the Hadith, but rather, when you look at what what you're
comparing it to. So if if, if for me, if I compare this life to Jenna, for sure, this life looks
		

			like a prison, right? Because there is no comparison between you know, this life where obviously I
have to live and I have to die I have to I mean, I will I'll laugh sometimes I'll cry sometimes I'm
going to feel pain I'm going to bleed I'm going to you know, this is this is a part of life that
nobody can can ever claim that they can avoid. And if I if I compare that to a life where Allah
subhanaw taala says, first of all, never ends there's no death. Second of all, I have one la Mola
home Yes, I know that there is no fear on them. And nor is there any sadness, no, no sorrow. Can
anyone claim that they ever no matter what amount of status you have, no matter what amount of fame
		

			you have, no matter what amount of money you have, you can never claim that you can escape these two
things, fear and sadness that you will never have to feel fear. And you will never have to feel
sadness. You can't do that in this life. And so, when you compare this life to the Hereafter, that's
when this life in comparison to the hereafter. And to in comparison to Jenna becomes a pair a can
becomes a prison. And beyond that, if you think about what is a prisoner, what does a prisoner feel
like? A prisoner is someone who has to be in a certain place for an appointed term, but they'd
rather be home right, the prisoner is basically waiting for their term to finish and you know,
		

			they're doing their time. But the prisoners attachment is to going home, the prisoners is always
kind of waiting to be released in order to go to a better place. So for a prisoner, they're in a
place that they need to be for an appointed time. But there's they know, they know very well, that
there is a better place. They know that there's a place they would rather be than where they are
now, but they are where they are for an appointment.
		

			Time. And so this is the mindset of a believer in this life, where we, we are in this life and we
live this life. And you know, nobody says that you you should be miserable. But rather, it's the
other way around that, that the true contentment comes from that attachment to a less panatela in
this life. And there's, you know, the the statement of of Tamia who talks about the paradise, his
paradise being in his heart, and that, that, that, that, that, that, that you can find a paradise in
this life even before the next. And one of the other statements which I love is that he who does not
enter the paradise of this life will not enter the paradise of the next life. And when you reflect
		

			on this statement, you you will understand that those people who are close to Allah subhanaw taala,
those are the people who enter the paradise of this life, that is the paradise of this light. It
isn't, you know, hanging out at the bars or the clubs or whatever it is that people try to do, to
you know, find happiness or to find pleasure, that's not the paradise but in fact, you know, that's
the true prison, because you're imprisoned for your, your, your distance from Allah subhana wa Tada.
And so looking at this, this Hadith, you know, that the the believer again, although there is a
paradise of this life, which is only in the nearness to Allah subhanaw taala, they're still, they
		

			still know that there's a better place a place where, you know, they can actually be with Allah
subhanaw taala physically, and we can actually see a loss of Hannah with Allah, and you have no, you
know, no sickness, no, it's no sadness, no fear. And so and so the comparison here is between this
life and a better life. But if you look, on the other hand at the one who believes that this life is
all you have, and so when you think that this life is all you have, it better be a paradise, right?
And and when you think about a person who is in what they believe is a paradise, that person would
never want to leave, that person would cling to that place. And this is exactly how Allah subhanaw
		

			taala describes the disbelieving soul, that when that soul is taken out of the body at the time of
death, Allah subhanaw taala describes it as an associate, that that, that that that soul has to be
torn out of the body because it thought it was the best it was already in the best it gets, you
know, if you think this, this is it, and you think, Okay, this is the best it's ever going to get, I
better make the most of it. So then you don't want to leave. Because you thought you were in
paradise. You know, it's like, the happiest place on earth, right? Disneyland. It's not really the
happiest place on earth at all. If you sit and reflect on us, Okay, anyway, when you sit, if you
		

			watch the kids at Disneyland, a lot of them are always screaming. And I feel like it's like so, so
overstimulated that, anyway, but the idea is, it's supposed to be the happiest place on earth. And,
and when you're there, you're never going to want to leave, right? If you're if you're already in
the happiest place on earth, wherever that really is, you're never going to want to leave. And so
that's the concept of, of the disbelieving soul leaving this life, it doesn't want to leave. And
that's why Allah subhanaw taala says when naza to God, that that when that, that it's it's talking
about the the angels that rip those souls out of the body because they don't want to leave. And then
		

			Allah subhanaw taala describes the believing soul When No, she thought that those souls when they
are taken from the body, they just flow out. And the reason is, if you go back to the analogy of the
prison, which was the analogy of the prophets, I send them what happens when you're, you know,
you're an inmate and you're in prison. And then your day comes where your term is over, and they
come in, they're opening up the cell, how many people are going to say, No, actually, I want to stay
here, actually, I'm going to hold on to these prison bars, and I'm not going to let go, because I
kind of like it here. You know, nobody's going to say that, because they know that outside of that
		

			prison is a much better home, that outside of that prison is the real life. And so that's really
the, the, you know, a beautiful analogy that the prophets I send that send them gives, in this
Hadith, where he says that the believer in this life, it's like a prison and for the disbeliever
it's like a paradise. And so, you know, again, understanding this and and really realizing how we
have to unlearn these concepts that you know, pain, sadness, happiness, laughter, tears, all of
these things are are given to us for a purpose. Allah subhanaw taala does not do anything without a
purpose. Allah subhanaw taala is you know, high above doing anything without a purpose. I can, you
		

			know, do very random things with no purpose. But Allah subhanaw taala doesn't do that Allah is high
above that. So everything he gives us
		

			Is with a very particular purpose. And and that includes our pain that includes sadness. And so the
question then is how do we cope? When we are encountered, when we do encounter pain, we do encounter
hardship, you know, loss, that that, first and foremost, we have to understand that this does not
mean that first of all a las panatela is is angry with us. This is also a concept we have to unlearn
that, that, that the idea that trial or test or hardship only comes as a punishment from Allah
subhanaw taala. If that were the case, then that would mean that Allah subhanaw taala out Avila was
punishing his own profits, because if you look at the lives of the prophets, they were the ones who
		

			were tested most and Hadith of the Prophet so that I send them says that Allah subhanaw taala tests
people based on their level of faith, based on their level of Amen, and that the people who are
tested most are the prophets and then after them, those who are, you know, next to them in in, you
know, after them and Amen. And so, the concept of tests being a punishment needs to completely be
unlearned. And when we do that, I think we can we can encounter it in a better way, that that as
long as any kind of hardship, any kind of pain, any kind of tests that we encounter, if it brings us
closer to Allah subhanaw taala, then that is actually a blessing for us, it's actually a gift from
		

			Allah subhanaw taala. Because ultimately, what matters in the end, is whether or not we are getting
closer to our ultimate purpose, or we're getting farther from our ultimate purpose. Anything that
will bring me closer to my purpose is good for me. And so even if that means a loss in the material
sense, it's still good for me. And the other way around is also true, that anything that brings me
farther away from Allah subhanaw taala brings me farther away from my ultimate purpose, no matter
what kind of increase in worldly increase it is. It's not it's, it's actually bad for me, it's
actually, you know, it's not it's, it's not a it's not a it's not a blessing, in fact, it's the
		

			opposite. And so we have to start to read, you know, reorient the way we see, you know, success and
failure and, and, and, and hardship and, and good and bad, we have to recalibrate, you know, this
whole our whole definition, you know, of these things and of these concepts. And part of doing that,
what that will do is it will make it much easier to encounter a hardship and instead of seeing it as
either a punishment or a sign that Allah is displeased with us, we can actually start to see it as a
blessing, that if, if this, if this hardship that I'm encountering is bringing me closer to Allah
subhanaw taala, if it's, if it's purifying me, if it's making me a better person, it's building my
		

			character, then it's the and then it's a blessing. And when we do that, we can start to really, you
know, US have the pain or have the hardship or have the, you know, whatever test that we're going
through, have it do its purpose, because it is sent for a purpose. And part of that Allah subhanaw
taala tells us in the Quran is La La Mirada Xiao Han, Allah says that he sends, you know, hardship
and tests and calamity in NBS, these types of things to the nations in order that they will come
back to us. In order that we come back to Allah soprano Donna. This is the reason he sends it. And
unless puntata talks about other reasons why he sends a pain or sends hardship or tests. And one of
		

			the other reasons is, is is to do the process, a process called thumb pace. Allah subhanaw taala
says Leo makossa livina me know that this process called Tom Haines means to purify, to purge, and
it's actually the same word that's used to describe what happens to gold in order to purify it, we
know that in order to purify gold, we have to heat it up, right and what happens when you heat up
gold is that it removes the impurities from the gold. And it's the same thing with us, our, our
hearts, our insides are full of impurities, all of us. And when Allah subhanaw taala it you know,
out of his mercy and love for us, he wants to purify us. And so one of the ways that we are purified
		

			is through these types of hardships. And this is something all sit back and reflect on in our own
lives of how sometimes the hardest times in our lives. were the times when we actually felt closest
to Allah subhanaw taala of pulling curly hair that was tough for a lady with a comb innovaphone
Rahim subhanak all over him darkness shadow under Illa in the unseen istockphoto corner to Lake was
Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh