Yasir Qadhi – Suicide Prevention Week

			hamdulillah All praise is due to Allah, the One and the unique. He it is whom we worship. And it is
his aid that we seek. He is the Lord of the oppressed. And he answers the prayer of the week as to
what follows on an unrelated but a very, very important topic. This week, is the National Suicide
Prevention Week of this country. And it is a topic that I have spoken about before and others have
spoken about as well. Some of you find it awkward, but your awkwardness is not going to stop the
rest of us from preaching and perhaps saving a life. We have to be aware of brothers and sisters,
that suicide is on the rise in a manner that is not just unprecedented, but inexplicable. We don't
		

			understand why in this country, it is the 12th cause of death of the entire population. In the state
of Texas, the suicide rate has risen over 30%, it is now the 11th cause of death of the entire
state. Think about that you have cancer, you have you know, sickness, you have this not number 11.
In this state, it's people taking their lives. And the number one demographics young men, young men
in particular, the number one demographics. In fact, in a certain category of young men, I think
from 11 to 20 or something, it is the second highest cause of death Subhanallah second highest
costs, and anybody who thinks that our community is safe, has not understood the reality of our
		

			community. Every few weeks here in Dallas, a janazah is prayed over one of our own, who for whatever
reasons, ended their own life. And brothers and sisters, it is important that as parents, as
educators, as community leaders, we understand the symptoms, the telltale signs, we are monitoring,
when we see a young one, when we see our own son, usually it's a son, sometimes a daughter, when we
see our own loved ones going down this path, it is imperative we educate ourselves about the
symptoms, I have given a whole host but others have given and log on to mine and check very briefly,
one of the main symptoms is complete withdrawal from society to change one's moods radically, for no
		

			reason, to start blaming oneself to force here, your son or daughter start saying, I wish I weren't
alive, the world would be a better place without me. These types of things, when you start hearing
them, you start seeing a mood change very radically, you start seeing a decline into depression, you
start hearing the the notion or the wish that I wish I were not here, I wish I were dead. These are
all symptoms and signs that you start alarm bells in your own in your own brain, you should realize
when you see this, you need to take this challenge seriously. And I have said this before, I will
say it again.
		

			Times have changed. Maybe we don't understand why this generation is feeling this way. It doesn't
change the fact that they are it doesn't change you're not understanding and my not understanding is
not going to change the reality. And the reality speak to any psychiatrists speak to any person in
therapy, they will tell you the reality is depression. And also thoughts of suicide are rising
exponentially in the next generation. And that includes our own children that includes our own our
own kith and kin. So parents, community leaders, educate yourselves about the symptoms of depression
and suicide, understand that it is a diagnosable disease. It is a disease of the mind. Do not
		

			dismiss it. Our generation and our elders. They were on the more dismissive side. Okay, that's fine.
That was their generation. They were wrong. We cannot dismiss depression. We cannot just say, Oh,
this is a figment of your imagination. It doesn't change the fact it's an actual tangible
psychological psychiatrically diagnoseable disease and therapy does help, not just Imani. IMANI is
also helpful, good friends helpful. But therapy does help as well. So when you find a young man or
woman, when you find somebody whom you feel is going down this path, engage with them, reach out to
them, show them that they are wanted and loved brothers and sisters, I will tell you one episode in
		

			my own office and my own interactions Wallahi It shook me to the core, a young man from our own
community, our own Dallas community wanted to get rid of his own life. And I'm trying to explain to
him and what not one phrase he said it struck me.
		

			He said the one reason I didn't do that was because I knew my mother loved me, and it would cause
her harm. It would feel she would feel hurt. So in order to not cause her pain, I didn't do it. This
phrase Subhanallah what saved him was the fact he knew his mother loved him, and he knew the pain he
would cause his mother
		

			That simple Realisation to know that a person is loved to know that a person feels validated. That's
on us. That's our job to make sure because all too often such young men or such young women feel
nobody cares about me. My parents don't like me they think I'm a disappointment. My parents think
I'm the biggest decision regret they ever had my heard my dad say so I heard my mom say, I wish I
wasn't born. When you start hearing and start thinking along with modern culture, along with
everything, along with whatever it might be, I don't know, I'm not a psychiatrist. I can diagnose. I
don't understand why, but it is on the rise. And I know that one suicide is not is more than enough
		

			for our community much more every few weeks is happening. If we can save one life, if we can save
one of our youth from going down this path, as Allah says, it is as if we have saved all of mankind.
So I urge all of you, all of you to reorient your thinking when it comes to suicide. When it comes
to depression. I urge all of you to be vigilant, especially with your teenagers, especially with the
next generation, no matter what they've done, okay? Sometimes they have to be rebuked,
understandably, but that rebuke must be within love. They must know they are loved, they must know
they're appreciated, they must know that your future and theirs are intertwined together, they must
		

			feel validated about who they are, even with their mistakes and shortcomings. Be careful, parents,
don't be so harsh that your children start thinking I wish I was never born, you have definitely
gone too overboard if they start thinking this way. So use your language with wisdom and understand
the next generation is not me and you we grew up in a different time and place you will have to
change because it's not their fault. They're being born at a different time in place. Frankly, it's
our responsibility. We were the ones who came most of us from another land, we were the ones who
chose to come here we were the ones so you cannot blame them for absorbing the values and the
		

			concepts that we find around ourselves. So the compassion has to begin with you. And in the end of
the day, you're the adult, not them. So please forgive my harshness, you need to step up to the
plate, and you need to act with the maturity and the love and the wisdom that only you can have.
What do you expect a 15 year old a 17 year old, they're still children trapped in the bodies of an
adult? What do you expect them to say except be a little bit harsh, mean nasty, they're throwing
tantrums. It doesn't justify you going the other way. You're the adult please brothers and sisters
act like that. And I'm sorry to be blunt here. But if you listen to their stories, if you listen to
		

			what their own parents say about them, if you listen and you interact with somebody who's flirting
with suicide, your own heart changes and you start thinking through different things. Brothers and
sisters make dua to Allah show love to your children have your households to be a household of love
and Eman and Taqwa and just lots of DUA and lots of love. That's all that we can do. And obviously,
if you find one such young man or woman, then please understand therapy does help. I have seen
myself some of these young men after therapy, they're singing a different tune, not necessarily
fully solved, but much better. therapy does help going to a professional train and Alhamdulillah
		

			Muslims are also getting involved in therapy and we now have Muslim psychiatrist and Muslim
therapist that can help out as well. So ask around any shoulder domestic as well can help you in
this regard. Most important thing it's our responsibility to protect the next generation. So we need
to learn we need to understand and we need to take on that responsibility. May Allah subhana wa Tada
help all of us in
		

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