Channel: Yasir Qadhi
Series: Yasir Qadhi - Ask Shaykh YQ
On Women Attending Funerals
Sr shamima emails and asks that my father passed away, and I wanted to attend his funeral and also go to his actual janazah. But then I was told that it is how long for a lady to go to the funerals and to attend the janazah. Can you please shed some light on this issue?
so we began by stating that the general rule is that any ruling that comes in our Sharia applies to both genders unless we find explicit evidence that this is a gender specific issue. And when it comes to the janaza It is well known that in early Islam, our Prophet system initially forbade people from visiting the graveyards. And then he asked Allah's permission to visit his mother's grave Amina. And then he said that I used to forbid you from visiting graveyards, then Allah allowed me to visit my mother's grave. So now I am telling you go and visit graves because it reminds you of the ark era. So this is a generic ruling right now both men and women, that right now we say it is
generic. And there's another Hadith as well the famous hadith of rhodiola. One, that whoever follows the janazah of a Muslim with a man and expecting a large reward, that that person who continues until there is going to be a Duffin, the person will come back with two mountains of good deeds. And each of these mountains is like the mount of overhead. So whoever follows in janazah until the burial takes place and then comes back, we'll get the reward of two large mountains. This is a general rule that as of yet would apply to both but there are a number of traditions in which women are specifically mentioned. So we need to examine these the most authentic, which is in Bukhari, and
Muslim and the most explicit and essentially this will be my verdict because it is very clear. In stable Hadith Sahih. Muslim Omar I'll tell you one of the famous Sahaba yet she said no Hina I need to buy in Jana, Izzy, what am your exam? Elena, this is in Bukhari and Muslim. We were forbidden, we meaning the womenfolk. We were forbidden from following the janazah. But at the same time, it wasn't made a strict issue. While I'm your exam, Elena, we weren't told to do so in a very strict manner. The general rule we were told not to follow. But it wasn't enforced. It wasn't. It was something that we weren't told is a very severe thing. This Hadith in Bukhari and Muslim and there are a
number of traditions in which scholars have different over the authenticity. The next heavy that will do is an Abu Dawood and scholars have different is it hasn't is a life that the Prophet system is reported to have said line Allahu czar, Eros, cobalt and in one virgin xo world or to local board allas Lana is upon the females who visit or who frequently visit the graves and who put candles on it was definitely historic and those who put candles on the graves. So there is a discussion is this hadith authentic or not, and those who make it authentic, then they divided into two camps is the meaning. Those ladies who do jihadi practices and they bring the candles to the grave? Or is the
meaning those ladies who merely visit the graves. So there is yet another level of meaning Now, what is the meaning of this hadith? those ladies who go and they will do because in the days of God, you know, it is instill, I think that the Chinese culture I think, or or their Japanese culture that when somebody dies, they hire professional mourners. Do you know of this thing that they hire professional mourners, and the mourners will come and they will cry out in a professional manner. And they will evoke the emotions of the people you know, it is human nature. When everybody is crying, you will feel sad when everybody's nervous. You will feel nervous when everybody's happy,
you will feel happy. So the purpose of these mourners is to bring about an atmosphere of wailing and sadness. And the jihadi Arabs had this practice well known. And that's why there are so many ideas that are forbidding this. So the question does this hadith follow the same genre that what is being forbidden is those ladies or because the phrase says those ladies who visit graze and put candles on it so they will
would go and they would surround the grave and they would put candles on do versing. So what is being forbidden ladies visiting, or the Jah Haley custom of hiring out those professional mourners, and they will wail and they will do a particular type of chanting and what not what is being forbidden. That is another issue as well. And then there's a header that is definitely weak so that this one is a controversy. Some have made it has been submitted live. And then the third headed, which is definitely weak, which is an urban module that it is narrated that our Prophet system saw some women coming back from janazah. And he said to the ladies, did you carry the janazah? They
said, No. Then he said, Did you shroud the janazah? They said no. He said, Did you put it in the ground and bury it? I mean, did you do any of the physical labor what that men do? Men carry it, men shroud it, men put it in men dig the grave men do so he's asking the one when they said no, no, no. And then he said, then you have come back carrying evil not carrying good deeds, okay. And this hadith is very clearly we can also even the wording that the process of is not the nature of the Hadith to put down in such a harsh manner when there's so this, so anyone who is not this week, in any case, so these are the three main ahaadeeth In this regard, based on these three hour format
hubs then extracted from these ahaadeeth. And the males have that was the most willing for the women to go to the journal is was the Maliki method. Essentially, the Maliki method hub considered these ahaadeeth to indicate only those women who are doing an Islamic practices, ie, the Wailing, and the shouting, and the they had a type of I'm not gonna call it poetry, but they had phrases they would say, okay, so for example, this is the biggest calamity How will we live after this? Who will take care of us? Our rock has disappeared. So they have phrases. These phrases are phrases of Jamelia. So they, they had this professional means of doing it, and especially it was something the women did
and it was associated with feminine mourning of the graves men did not do this. It is the women that did it. So the Maliki's understood all of this applies to that category of ladies not to ladies full stop. And so, essentially, a saw we in his book,
The interpretation of multimatic has always called he says that it is john is it is allowed for an elderly lady without any conditions to go attend the janazah. And it his job is for a young lady to go if she is appropriately addressed and the janazah is of her close relative. Okay, now remember in that society, young ladies did not exit the house at all except for a reason. So the Maliki method was saying this is one of those reasons where she's allowed to go if her brother if her father, if her uncle passes away, then she can go as long as she observes Islamic etiquette in Hurly buss, and also in what she says and does, okay, there's the Maliki mother, but there are on one side in them
smack in the middle is the humbly and the shaffir method, both the humbleness and shaffir ease, they said that it is not how long but neither is it is it is my crew, and my crew means it's best not to do but if you do it you are not sinful. Okay, this is the position of the ham buddies and of D which one shaffir is this is the explicit position mm hmm No, he says that.
A mom in no way says it is much more that what we mentioned that it is makrooh for the for the women to follow the journal is this is our method and the method of the vast majority of odema. abdomen there said this the position of women was root of a bin Omar abou mama of our issue of masuka hustle and bustle and Nakayama Adam Lambert is aka Morocco, authority and ozeri so on and so forth. And mumble core to be the famous scholar from Cordoba, Spain and Morocco to be said, the explicit hadith of Omar altea clearly shows that it is merely discouraged and not harm. And this is the vast majority of our dilemma. This is a lot to be said. Okay, the headache of homeopathy is which one? We
were told not to follow the agenda is, but we weren't told in a strict way what it wasn't enforced. It wasn't something that was made a big deal of if people did, so. the strictest in this regard is of course the one might have that is left and it is the Hanafi madhhab and the Hanafi madhhab. They did not make it out on but they said it is mcru kureha to heddy me not karahan z the Hanafi is have two types of mcru. Right the other methods are one type of mcru. I mentioned this in an earlier q&a that I did the HANA fees have two types of mcru one in which there is a small amount of sin one in which there is no sin. Okay, so makuu kureha 10 z. There's no sin
makuu kurata hurry me, there's an amount of sin but not like sin going to jahannam that's how long stuff that's like the big stuff, right? And the Hanafi categorization is actually more sensible, as I said before, nonetheless, they said, This is mcru kanaha, the hairy me that there shall be an amount of sin but not a large amount is like basically it's, it's not good and really she should not go and if she goes, then she has committed a minor sin. This is the hanafy position. And that's why in our cultures of India, Foxton and other hanafy cultures, basically, it is unheard of or unknown that the women go button out of other cultures, it is not as strict of an issue in many Arab
cultures because of the method issue. Also, there are other narrations as well that the other scholars use of them the Hadith in Sahih Bukhari that the Prophet system was walking, and he saw a lady sitting at a table crying, okay. And it is very clear, by the way, because at that timeframe, the only cover they had was back here. Okay, so the lady is sitting there at the cover, crying, not wailing, big difference. Crying is halaal, crying, no sin, wailing, what is wailing, to raise your voice, and to say phrases of jaha Leah, and to beat oneself This is what is how long, but to cry, and to feel sad, is completely not only highlight, it's a sign of humanity. So he passed by a lady
idefense in Bahati, she's sitting at the cupboard, and it was the puppet of her husband or the one who was to take care of her, and she's crying. And the profitsystem said, Oh, servant of all the female servant of Allah, be patient, be patient, and expect a lot to reward you. He gave her words of of what encouragement, had it been How long had had been sinful?
Then he would not have said this. She did not recognize him. And she said, You don't know what I have suffered. You don't know who this you know, the level of what not, you know, and she said something very harsh. Go away from here. He lay candy.
And the processor in his other he left and
one of the Sahaba and little he was a judo What did you just say? Who do you know who this person was? She didn't recognize because she was in her grief, you know? So then she rushed up, she said Yasuda ly didn't recognize you as well. I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. And the processor did not get angry. But he said a very powerful phrase. What is the phrase in a subtitle and the subtitle oola patience is demonstrated at the first stroke of calamity, how you react when you first hear the news, how you react in the first few minutes and half hour hour, that shows patience. Everybody comes down in a week, everybody how you react as soon as you hear the news, meaning, he's saying in
a very gentle manner. You weren't patient. That's what he was telling the lady. But the point is, very clearly she's sitting at the cupboard. And he's giving her words of encouragement, also more explicit than this and much more powerful. in multiple narrations. We know that Chateau de la Juana after the death of the prophet SAW Selim, she, of course, remained in her house completely, she never exited the house, because of the verses of hijab that were extra from the Prophet system. However, she wanted to go for Hajj. So she asked permission from Earth minded when I found out the law one. And so that year, all of the wives except for one, listen to my lectures, otherwise, the
person went went over all of this, all of the wives they went for which in a special caravan in a special entourage with special guards that are going to take them for Hajj. And on the way back, it is narrated in multiple texts. Without a question. This is authentic. She went to the grave of her brother, Abdul Rahman Ibn Abu Bakar. He was buried outside of Makkah. And so she went to there, and she walked to the grave, and she made do art for her brother. And
I'll quote you one of these narrations that Abdullah bin AB Malaika says that our Isha came back one day from the graveyard, and I said, oh, oh omble momineen. Where did you go? She said, I came back from the upper of my brother Abdul Rahman Ibn abubaker. Abdul Rahman is the brother who took her for Umbra. After Hajj, if you remember Mr. Asia to name right. Her brother, Abdul Rahman was the one who took her and then took her back that was gonna be a bucket, and he passed away in the Philippines of, I think, or model de la one. And so
immediately, Monica says, didn't the Prophet sallallahu Sallam forbid women from visiting public? This is a very explicit Hadith. Didn't the Prophet system say you're not supposed to go? And our issue says, Yes, we used to be forbidden and then he allowed us to visit. Okay, and this
Hadeeth is in by Houthi unhackme. Yes, it used to be forbidden, then he allowed us. And in another version, when she visited the grave she made, she stood at the grave she made for her brother. And then she said, If I had been here to witness your burial, I wouldn't have come to your grave. Meaning. The point is, I don't want to be out of my house, I will go to the cabin come back. But I wasn't witnessing I wasn't there when you were lowered. I wasn't there to pray janazah over you, I was in Medina. So if I had witnessed your janazah, I wouldn't have done this detour. And I would have gone straight home. Okay, so the point is that, you know, she went there now.
Other scholars respond, and they say, the fact that I should have the law on her went, that's her opinion. And the idea that the processes are there, to which respond, technically, that's a valid point. But the opinion of Ayesha is no joke, especially in feminine matters. And she knows feminine, better than other later interpreters.
Others say that she didn't actually visit the grave of Republic of her brother, but it happened to be next to the road. And the responses, this is an assumption that has no basis number one, number two, there is no upper that is literally on the road that you're going there. There is a small graveyard, wherever there was. And the point is she herself explicitly says, If I had witnessed your janaza, I wouldn't have come here, which means she's going out of her way. Why? Because those who say that it is not allowed. They say, we must interpret that I should didn't go visit the grave. The grave was on her path, you see the difference, right? And they say, if you're walking, and there's a
grave there you're not visiting. And this is a stretch like it's, I mean, can you imagine the cupboard is right next to inches, walking between muck and mud and issues going to the small little village that he passed away, there's a pub there. And the wording is clear that I have come here because I wasn't able to witness your janazah. So this doesn't hold much weight. And then they say, those who say that it is not allowed. They say that. The very fact that she says had I witnessed your janazah, I wouldn't have come shows she knew that the default is that women should not come to the graves, you understand where they're coming from right to decide this point, the very fact that
she's saying, had I witnessed your janazah, I wouldn't have come, it means she knows women should not come to the graveyard to respond to this two things. Number one, if it was how to home, even if she didn't witness the janazah, will she be able to come?
If it was sinful, which he publicize, that I'm with. So this actually proves that it is not how long at all because she's announcing it. And number two, you're assuming she's not going to the grave because of the prohibition of women. But there's another more explicit assumption that she doesn't want to go to the grave because she's supposed to be in a job, which is explicit in the Quran, right? That Allah excellences in the Quran, that remain in your hijab, remain in your houses, and don't go out. So she only exited for Hajj. And it could easily be interpreted that if I had witnessed your janazah, I would have rushed straight back. And I would not have done the detour
because I want to get back to my house not because of the prohibition, but because she wants to be in her house, which is the wives of the processor. So to summarize this question that we move on to the second one,
it is clear those who wish to follow the hell he might have no problem. It is mcru Cora to help me and I respect as you know my position, I have no problem. I think it's a good if somebody follows. There might have no problem with that. That having been said, we also have to be very sensitive, that times have changed. And our women are no longer sitting at home as they did for much of Islamic history. And what has is happening is that we are depriving them of the most essential places they need to be like the masjid, for example, right? It is true. Some scholars of the past said, you know, let the woman stay at home when women would stay at home. And there's no need for them to come
to the masjid. Even though the Hadith is clear, she should come if she wants to. But there are some others that said that, but in a society and at a place in time, where our wives our daughters, our mothers are, and I'm not saying this is positive, I'm just giving it factually. They go everywhere. like as if there is nothing in exiting the house. The notion of remaining in the house is not even known to them. It is gone from the minds of our women. And I'm not saying that as a good thing or as a bad thing. I'm simply saying it as a fact that that notion is gone. To bring up these issues and then say Yeah, go ahead, do your shopping. Go Kroger's, do your education in the hospital. They
should do education. Don't get me wrong. I'm just
Saying, go everywhere. But don't come to the masjid.
Do everything when your father dies, don't go to the barber. You see in this society, and in this mindset, if we keep on pushing them into a corner, the reaction might be an illegitimate anger in which they say, we're going to take over, give the hold, but from now on, okay?
I was in Los Angeles on the weekend. And there is a Masjid there, that is only women, no men are allowed inside hold was given by the women, all run by the women, everything is there. Now I'm not criticizing publicly, I'm not definitely not endorsing. But I will say one thing, if you keep on pushing, pushing, pushing was going to happen. So my philosophy and I'll be very explicit about this, where the Sharia allows some leeway. Give that leeway. Where the Sharia has some
breathing room, then hamdulillah give and where the Sharia has a red line. That is where we need to enforce. Because if you want to keep on moving the Red Lion back back back, don't be surprised. I mean, in our timeframe to tell
a daughter that she cannot go to the gentleness of her father.
She will literally say what type of religion is I can't even come in, and and you know, be and whatnot, which we should say, look, men and women are allowed to go, but there must be proper decorum. You observe the etiquettes, no wailing, no screaming, no shouting. And if there is a fear that that might happen, then we tell this lady think twice. And if you insist on going, we will have other ladies there that if that happens, you will be you know,
taken out that this is not appropriate that at a wedding. And by the way, at a funeral, by the way, this is something that I have witnessed myself. So it's not just hearsay, that women are not told this and they attend the janazah. And especially if it's a sudden death, right, and you have, you know, a young lady screaming at the top of her lungs, you know, just bawling and saying things that are not appropriate to be said, you know, it's not something that of Islam that you see how are we going to live now who's going to take care of me, a lot took care of you not this man. A lot took care of you, not your husband or brother or father. But at that emotional state. If you say
something, I can't live any more stuff that person was giving you life a lot is Hey, Uncle, you. So this is where we draw the red line. These are the battles we should be fighting. And we say very clearly, that is something that should not be done. Nonetheless, if somebody wants to follow the other method, then I have read that's their business. But the other three methods they say it is not sinful to do, and that is the position I hold on a large division knows best.
Enough in dounia Solomon