Presented at ICNA-MAS Convention 2018
Yaser Birjas – Manners of the Prophet (pbuh)
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the manners of Islam, including the importance of good manners and the use of the clock and manners to prevent confusion. They emphasize the need for individuals to show their true values and maintain healthy friendships to achieve success in life. The importance of manners in relationships and avoiding corruption on Earth is emphasized, along with the need for individuals to deal with people in a positive manner and strive to perfect their manners and demands the Prophet sallama.
AI: Summary ©
Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.
sola, sola Baraka, Dr. Mohamed
Salah, Mata Sleeman kathira.
So manners of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as mean of fortifying our faith, our faith, our Eman in this life. Now I know when it comes to the subject of a flap and manners, many, many people that consider this to be a cliche. We talked about this a lot. Every time we want to talk to the youth, we have to hammer them with behave, behave. And the misbehave is behavior of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the kids are getting tired of this. The youth are getting tired of this, you know, what, what does it mean to behave well anyway? I mean, does that mean that you have a set standard that you can just fit in? And if you don't, then you're not a good Muslim?
Does it mean that if you don't have a specific you know, kind of like etiquette that that means completely you're out of the fold of Islam? What does it mean to behave? What does it mean to follow the manners of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam that is something I want to share with you shallow does at least we take the concept of manners of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam in the right context, and we make something applicable, something that we learn from and we follow inshallah, but we need to understand why is it so important to to come to the manners and o'clock of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. Now, Muslims living in in areas were predominantly ruled by non Muslims
is nothing new. But doing it as we live in today in America, and the West in general is a new thing. If you check the history of Islam in the past, Muslims lived in Europe for many, many years, they lived in the middle of Africa lived in Asia and other places, lots of non Muslims and patches of Muslim communities here and there. But that wasn't out of the ordinary because they were local over there. They originally they were indigenous to that society, but for the Muslims by choice for the Muslims by choice to come and travel from the Muslim land to the non Muslim land that's never heard of before. But now we passed that stage we live in stage number two Muslims are born over here right
now, second generation and third generation so become more than digital to the society. But then, why is it we don't see that the Muslims who once went to Africa, once went to Indonesia, they were able to transform their societies, the Muslim societies, by the Muslims are living in the West living in America, they're unable to do that. As a matter of fact, we're getting backlash instead, instead of people welcoming and saying, Wow, I want to be a Muslim like these guys. We've seen the backlash right now, what went wrong? And what was the big difference? The big difference goes back again to the principle we all are talking about this subject of manners. And
you see, when the Muslims went to Indonesia, they went to, to Africa, they went as merchants, business people, and everywhere they went, they carried with them, their etiquette, their or their manners, they carried with them their attitude, they carry with them, even the concept of honesty, decency, justice, fairness, they guide with them the clock and the mouth of the good merchant, things that when people used to see they will be impressed by, they will look and they say, wow, these people are out of this world. They're amazing. And slowly and gradually, with good manners and lots of power, no matter how many barriers you put between you and other people. We just kind of
feel we start breaking all these barriers down because of good manners and good law. How many stories you've seen, and you read about and probably watched recently on social media, about somebody acting so mean towards some other Muslim brother or sister, but their brother or sister they reply and reciprocate that meanness, With what? With goodness, with good manners. And then these people just got like meltdown. Like, wow, I didn't expect this. I didn't expect that, you know, reply like this. And then somehow, you break all these barriers, and instead of they become friends forever, it changed their view on the subject of Islam as Muslims because of love and
manners. They truly mean a lot. The difference is that the Muslims back in the day when they went to Africa, Indonesia, they cared a lot and the manners of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. So for that reason, these people they believed and they followed here in America, the Muslims are living here, we live in extremely radical individualistic culture. Everybody's for themselves, people they fighting to be the best. They want to be specifically in the in the age of the selfie culture and the Snapchat culture, the self centered culture, everybody wants to be the celebrity of their own selves.
And as a result, we're willing to step on other people's you know, territories and rights and a lot and manage become irrelevant in this kind of competition. Unfortunately, the clock and the manners of the prophets of Allah cell and they're very important, because even if you don't think it's so important to you
But to us collectively as a society as a community, we need that otherwise without a clock and manners, what is going to happen to the world? z when the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. He migrated from Mecca to Medina, when he married from Mecca to Medina, the people of Medina, the people of Medina, they were waiting for him outside for hours and hours, days and days and days from the morning until the late afternoon when it gets hot and the Prophet didn't arrive, they go back home, so there'll be waiting for him, hundreds of them. But you know what, many of these people didn't even didn't even know who was a prophet sallallahu wasallam they didn't have never seen him before.
But they were intermedium why they were so eager, so excited, so happy that they want to see the Prophet sallallahu wasallam because the year before the messenger sallallahu wasallam he sent to them. What do we know today as the first ambassador in Islam, and who was that manager, the young man What was his name? Mousavi Mousavi. When the prophets Allah Sam sent him with the group of the game from yesterday, and after a year, hundreds of people embrace Islam. They haven't seen the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam yet.
To show you how much they were eager to see the Prophet when the prophets Allah xlm and overcast days and that small caravan within came came in. People were looking and they trying to figure out who was Mohammed, they couldn't tell. They look at
aerosolized sauce and which one is Mohammed didn't even know who was Rasulullah. But he wanted to meet him. When he saw the confusion in the eyes of the people here the law and took the outer garment, he took his clock off his shoulder, and he shaded the profits of the lesson from the sun. And when he did that, the people look at the prophet SAW somebody said, Ah, so that's Rasulullah. They were so excited to meet Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, where all of this came from, came from a simple message. His student, most urban Romanian, he displayed the greatest degree and level of mannerism. And that
is for that reason, they thought in their mind, if this is the students, can you imagine the mentor?
If this is the product? Can you imagine the source Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam. So when he came, everybody was talking to me the prophet SAW what the line was so excited, so eager to me, they're sort of like
After all, the fruit doesn't fall far away from the tree
as the Muslims today and specifically for the next generation shout louder of our youth brothers and sisters, who coming up for hopefully vanilla as they carry in their hands the banner of Islam for the next generation. In which manners are we doing this? The clock of the prophets of Allah Salaam, they mean a lot to us. Because no matter what you say, no matter what you do, people will look what you do what you say when what you express to them in terms of Dhamma they will go back and see how you behave. That is going to be the thing that will determine if they should follow you lead or not. Do we have Muslims in amongst ourselves today? How many Muslims live amongst us today? Who really
truly there are actually preaching Islam through their actions not just to their statements. Rasul Allah, Allah. The prophet SAW Allah sevens manners, were perfect for human beings. And as a matter of fact, the message of civil law was praised in the Quran for his manners. Allah says of the prophets of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam were in Nicola Allah, Who do
you need a Mohammed on a great standard of character, the best manners, Miss o'clock sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. But what does that exactly mean? people they, as human beings, you guys, you know, we have two phases, right? We have the public face and the private face. The public face is all of the smiling face, the happy face that the one that you show right now and the conference when you go around, right? When you go to the hotel room, that's when you get really upset with your kids.
You have two different faces as human beings. So some people admit at the time of Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, they went around checking with the wives of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam came for Canada can be Salalah what he was asking about the manners of the Prophet. Now what do you mean by that the purposes of as a public figure, and he's all over the place, you know, the flock of the Prophet, go to the masjid walk with him for some time, you see this in public all the time, watch the Juma and you know, for yourself on the matters of the profits of the LA salon. That wasn't what they were asking about. What they were asking about is his private manners, his travel club, because
we know in public, he's going to behave that way. But what about inside is he that like us, we have, you know, the double standard. So I should have allowed that. I know when she heard him asking the question, she wanted to finish this quickly, and just going to end it there. She said,
like, Hey, stop, don't ask these questions because gonococcal Quran, the Quran, Allah, his mouth
As was the was the Quran itself, which means he doesn't fluctuate. Whenever they are in the Quran, he follows it salon salon. It's not just for the Baraka, we read the Quran for the Baraka, and we memorize the Quran just to get the title. But we don't put the Quran into action into the practice of the clock of Rasulullah sallallahu sallam. What is the essence of being a young Muslim? Because of Hamdulillah, one of the largest Muslim organizations we have in the country is young Muslims, right? And what does it mean to be young Muslim Ummah? I mean, all of us, we kind of lost the title em, in the young Muslim. So we just have young brothers and sisters. Is it actually young Muslims
right now? That's gonna mean the most? Are we? Are we doing what we're supposed to be learning? Are we having that lack of Rasulullah sallallahu. In our personal life, like we do it when they get together? How much of that are we practicing the law of Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam will mean a lot. The meaning of being a Muslim, it means actually to be a good human being a better human being a better citizen. So to
summarize the mission of being a Muslim, the mission of his Dawa and as the mission of yours as young Muslim young brothers and sisters, he said,
in emigrate to Masada,
I was sent to the people to help them perfect their character, their manners, means the entire message of the prophets, Allah set up the entire meaning of doing Salah siyam. When you give charity when you help other people, when it's not in other people's faces, when you do this, when you do that, all the thing that you do, in order to identify yourself with being Muslim is really being a better human being.
perfecting your manners and your of law. But if you being a human being a perfect human being in terms of your speed, your skills, your way of dealing with other people in terms of in academia and this and that and so on. What's the point of your manager do not reflect any of that title being the leader to Muslim?
Allah subhanho wa Taala praise the Prophet sallallahu Sallam for his a flock and his manners. He said, Well, I couldn't afford them.
And how they did if you were heart viewer harsh, and hard and hard hearted, they will be this do this first away from you. They will not come around you. What does that tell us? If you would like to be that Muslim, if you'd like to be that person who will take that message to the next level in Sharla, who Darla, it's important, it's imperative that you display and you hold on yourself to the highest standard of character, because he is the Messenger of Allah Azza wa sallam was instructed that if you want the people to be around you, soften your heart,
soften your heart to them, care about them, make sure that they see that and make sure that it's genuine. See one thing within about that lack of Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam is that he saw the lie was that he dared to care. Today, our youth have been taught to be you know, self centric, to love themselves more than anybody else to get attraction you know, towards themselves. And that's why they compete and they fight for likes and for followings and comments and, and all that stuff on social media. Unfortunately, many they care about that so much so that they lose themselves in the process. And I talked about this last episode attended the lecture, that you need to make sure to
maintain a healthy relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala. On a personal level, yes, as you try to promote yourself as a diet as a speaker, as inshallah, a good source of information and good source of power for people. Don't forget about yourself. You need to learn to care about other people in time and an age that people don't care much about others. We need to care about them. And that's why the professor was instructed to care about other people. So the bottom line was allamani
What does it mean exactly? to care about other people you see as a Muslim, as the Muslims are good manners is needs to be observed in almost every aspect of our life, every aspect of our life, whether it's business, personal marriage, whatever that is, look at something very personal such as the subject of marriage. When people get married, and by the way, I do a lot of you know, marriage counseling and premarital young men and women they come to me and they asked me, can you help me find somebody inshallah for me, parents come to me, can you help me find someone for my daughter, someone for my son? I said, What do you guys are looking for? What is the first thing people look
for? Can you guys can you guys hear me?
The guys that say beauty, thank you.
That's really unrealistic these days. Unfortunately, I know.
Money status, the job maybe has to be in Hyderabad or something like this. Whatever it is. We're looking for so many things, people that share different values than to decide which is the who is the best person for my son who's the best person for my daughter. But
The prophets of Allah Salam instructed us to look for two valuable things in any person. He said, so the last Alameda documento, nadina, wakulla COVID.
If you find somebody who someone comes to you to propose to you, and you're satisfied with their Deen and UCLA, what does it mean? Their Deen, that means their relationship with the Creator. And Allah manners, their relationship with the creation. If you find someone like this says, You accept them, no matter what. And then he said, if you don't do so
if you don't do that, you're gonna cause a lot of fitna a lot of corruption on Earth. Unfortunately, it was hella I was working last night. And today, me and my wife, were talking about it, and just like, all these young men and women, and we're still having a problem finding people to get married.
All over, because we have different standards are started not unified anymore. Back in the day, it was very simple look for the management of law. Now we expanding that Why? Because we have these selfish needs for that. And as a result, obviously, we start coming across against each other's personal needs. And that's where a man has been the most, how would you interact with other people? The manners of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam are very, very important. Why is it so important? Why is it so important? It is very important, because we've come to a lot and man is really they define who you are,
what you do in your life, everything that you do, the way you talk, the way you walk, where you go, where you take things and how you take them and all the stuff that's on even how you behave. And on social media and the virtual world. All of these things, they define who you are, why because your your your character is nothing more than just constant micro decisions, these micro decisions that you make, when you decide what to say, and how to say, what to do, and how you do all this and decide who you are, and your mask, who you are, what your characters gonna. So these things are very important for us. So how do I deal with people? I need to make sure that I deal with people in the
best manner Best of luck. Do I reciprocate based on how they treat me? The answer is absolutely not. You don't treat people based on how they behave towards you know, otherwise, if you're gonna do that, along with Stan, we end up just kind of like killing each other.
Instead, we deal with people based on our standards of mannerism, not theirs. Why did it good, man, good manners, even business. Even for those who like to be successful after they graduate from school, they would like to go up higher in the ladder of you know, of business and courier and so forth. What, what is the most important thing there, I know competition is very is a good thing too. But when it comes to a club, it's higher and much more important than intelligence. There's something called IQ and something called EQ. IQ is basically is your your academic, your intelligence, your brain, the way you think the intellectual koshien but then that doesn't qualify
you to be the best you know, business person, or the best doctor, the best engineer, the best manager and so on, or the best teacher, what qualifies to be that to have the EQ which is the emotional quotient, and that is basically your level of knowledge and manner, and how you interact with people.
So focus on your manners focus in rockleigh, even for your own good. That's very important in all aspects, marriage, social life, Business School relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala, you need that?
Now, the last point I want to share with you being realistic, when we talk when we talk about love and marriage, obviously keep saying that the highest standard of character and at the center of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. But is it even possible?
Is it possible? Can we in this age implement the heart and the minds of the prophets Allah Salaam, so perfectly like he did? So Allah Allah, so Allah? The answer is, I wish I hope so. But let's be realistic. We living in a generation that is completely different.
And we talk about the Sahaba de la gnome, which is why a lot of our young men and women and this is not just for the parents in particular and their educators as well. When it comes to bringing examples from the life of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam and the companions to the young brothers and sisters of our time, we always bring them specific names. like they've asked you this question. How many of you can count how many of you can count 100 names of hobbies? Raise your hand.
If you can count 100 names or hobbies 100 names?
How about 50 names?
A few hands 25 names
10 names of the hobbies.
Okay, about five names of the hobbies. I'm gonna count five names as a hobby. Come on. That's all
Almost everybody, right? So if you cannot count 100 names of Sahabi Where did the other 1000s companions go?
Whenever we bring examples for our children, we always bring the example of who, Abdullah
Abdullah and Omar, Abdullah Han, Ayesha Fatima, very common, very famous names. And we say this is a standard of character. But you know, that wasn't all those hobbies, the list of Sahaba is going on and on and on. And some of them were just, you know, average people. Some of them were Bedouins, some of them they committed, you know, mistakes, I made sins that they were punished for it, and so on. So, the Sahaba among themselves, were not all perfect. So when we talk about the friction, as a matter of law, we need to understand and teach ourselves as well, that it is a process
getting that level of standard of character, remember, it is a process. It's not like one thing you acquire, and then what whether you have it or you don't have it at all, please don't treat the subject of o'clock and manage as being so so solid like this and static, that whether you have it, or you don't have it, no, it's a process. What does that mean? Because a lot of us are young ones, specifically, in the process of perfecting their manners. And there are a lot they make a lot of mistakes. And when every time they make a mistake, what happens to them? They feel discouraged or disheartened. People, they start criticizing them. And they start putting them down or saying oh my
god, you do this Lumsden, shame on you, oh, my God, you How could you do this? So they feel really discouraged. And as a result, they say, what is it I knew it? I'm a hypocrite. I can't be among these good people so they quit. Don't listen to that. Reaching that level of mannerism is a process and you will try you will continue down you'll make mistakes. That's right. That's right. I will keep doing it. And every time I do something wrong, I'll fix it and Charlottetown lets me do this can be found actually in Sula to Wasilla when Allah subhanho wa Taala says about dealing with difficult people he says of Hannah medalla wallet is stolen has to do with
the good and the bad, the not equal. its viability is and always repel, always respond in that which is best for a lady vena cava nawada Carnival in Hamming perhaps with whom you have hostility or enmity becomes the most beloved to you. And then Allah says Allah Allah Allah Allah Dena Saba, only those sorts of severe impatience can handle this, only those recipient patients can hold on to this. Well, maybe
only those who do so will get reward from Allah subhana wa Tada. So Allah telling you Be patient, no matter what other people who wouldn't when they don't reciprocate your kindness, no matter what Be patient and allow will reward you for it. And then, as I tried to do that, I'll make mistakes. So lots of 100 Allah knows that very well. So he said, what
the law is the shape and whispers do which means if you try and you make these mistakes, and the shape and kind of like deceives you at the shop and attempts you and user stop doing doing good and do something about like if you lose it the moment, one moment, it doesn't mean that's it, that's the end of the road, no recalibrate, secret was with a law surgeon, go back again to this path of goodness and shallow Donna and continue. Remember reaching the manners of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam? Absolutely, it's the ultimate goal. Realistically speaking, it's a process, you're not going to become an Ibis all of a sudden, or Anatole de la or I know, you're gonna probably be that
anonymous Sahabi at some point, and then slowly and gradually upgrade your level and Sharla until you get there. And even when you get there, you're still a human being after all, he will continue struggling and you continue to strive, and you continue to your best to perfect your manners and demands of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam it's very crucial that we observe that but we need to start from somewhere and I hope that you guys get the chance and read the life of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam learn from the Prophet sallallahu Sallam the little things and manners of dealing with people before anything melas Panama dynamic among those who have the best o'clock herbal amin
and make it heaven your scales and bring it closer to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and Jonathan Allah. salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.