Yaser Birjas – Dealing With Offensive People With Patience
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AI: Transcript ©
How do you deal with offensive people?
If you had people, you know, around you,
friends,
neighbors,
coworkers,
random dudes, you know, in the shopping center,
and they're just gonna say something bad to
you, how do you respond to them?
Should you always retaliate
and if someone says a word you'll send
send it back again or or should you
always just forgive and brush it off and
say, it's alright.
How do you respond to people when they're
very offensive? Let's see what the prophet
did
and what does it mean to be patient
in these circumstances. Hadith number 42
in the other salih in the book of
Sabr, the chapter on patience.
So Bismuz Udi says after the battle of
Hunayn,
the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, he
favored some people in a distribution of spoils
for
consolation,
some people who gave them a little bit
more extra.
And he gave and he gave names. He
gave Al Aqraib and Habes,
Rayna ibn ibn
Hasan,
and, he said each of them he got
a 100 camel,
and he showed favor also to some more
honorable persons among the Arabs.
Now, just to give perspective over here, Al
Aqraib and Habes, Ayn ibn Hasan and others,
they were from the leaders of Quraish.
And these people, just few days before that,
they were not Muslims.
Just before that.
So how come the prophet all of a
sudden he gives them a 100 camel? A
100 camel in our modern time
is equivalent to saying $1,000,000.
This is how valuable a 100 camel back
then. Like when you say this person has
a 100 camel,
like nowadays we say he's a millionaire. That's
what it means. So to give someone a
whole $1,000,000 like this is like, woah,
that's a lot of money.
And for what?
Yeah. They're leaders but they were non Muslims
a few days ago.
So some of the Ansar
didn't like that.
Some of the did not like that.
Just to give also perspective to the story
over here, remember the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam,
he came to
the conquest of Mecca with 10,000
warriors,
so they conquered Mecca.
Now after they conquered Mecca, who is left
in the Arab who can stand against the
prophet
Not too many people,
but particularly the people of Zakkif,
which is in Al Qaif. It's a very
fortified place in the in the top of
a mountain.
So the prophet
he heard about Thaqif
Hawazin.
They're recruiting their armies outside of Mecca, somewhere
in the mountain hill areas.
So he wanted to immediately before they become
a threat, he wanted to go and finish
it before it becomes a real a real
thing.
So after the prophet
he finished from Makkah, conquers Makkah, stood in
front of the people of Makkah, said, what
do you think I'm gonna do to you?
They say we
know
you. You're a good person, you're gonna be
good to your family.
He said you're all free.
A lot of people embrace Islam, 2 to
3,000.
Some of those
2,000 people came out with the prophet
So they were about 12,000
marching with the prophet
to meet the people of Hawazin
and Thaqif.
So what did they say to themselves?
Says,
now we're out no one can outnumber us.
Now we have the power of numbers, that's
what they said.
But they were easily ambushed by the Qifanawazir
in the mountains.
And when they were ambushed,
those 12,000
almost, many of them start retreating and going
back.
They were shocked.
And to which the prophet
saw the people
dispersing away from him,
he
stayed on his on his mule
and he starts calling
I am the prophet, no doubt in it.
I'm the son of Abdul Muttalib.
Like he is provoking the people right now
in 2 fronts,
the religious ones and the traditional one, the
cultural ones.
The religious one says I am the Prophet,
where are you going?
And for the newly embraced Islam, the Arab,
they say what's wrong with you? I'm your
leader. I'm the son of Abdul Muttalib still.
And then he starts calling Ansar
Ansar Ansar Ansar. 1 narration the Prophet
called the Ansar 3 times
because Ansar,
they vowed that they will support the prophet
at all fronts, in all aspects.
Now the narration he called and he called
So he calling the
and the So the they came defending the
Prophet
in this difficult time
until they became victorious
and the prophet
took over, and there were a lot of
spoils that they were collected.
A lot of things were collected.
Now, the prophet
starts giving those spoils
to some of the elders of Quraish, those
who newly embraced Islam.
So they gave 1,000,000.
And he gave some of the who
lost everything when they did their hijra, their
migration to Madinah, and now they're getting something
back.
But what did the Ansar take with them?
The Prophet
So
the Prophet did not give anything to the
Ansaar,
so they start talking.
So like, look, when it is difficult,
they call us.
But when things get easy now, we've forgotten.
And when the prophet heard about those words
from the Sahaba,
he called the Ansar together.
He said only the Ansar,
and he called the Ansar.
And he says
I'm hearing some some things, you've been you've
been saying things
lately. What is that that you're saying?
They all kept quiet. They're
embarrassed. They said, well, look, don't weren't you
divided, I unite you together?
You were weak, I made you strong. You
had nothing, I gave you everything.
And the prophet said, well, answer me.
Answer me.
You could say, yeah, but you're also being
chased out, we gave you shelter, you're alone
and we gave you community, with this and
that, And he was telling them that, look,
your favors are well known to me. And
they would say,
I know the favor is from the Prophet
us. We can't say we've given any favor
to the Prophet
So there were a few words of this,
and then the prophet said, look, listen.
The only reason I haven't given you anything
because I am depending on your iman.
These people I'm giving them the sweetness of
this dunya
because I don't trust their iman.
So I'm giving them with the dunya.
Don't you wanna be among those who
see others going away with dunya and you
go home with the Prophet
He says
If it wasn't a muhajir, I would have
wished to be an Ansari.
You are
my dithar. You are the inner the inner
layer of my garment, and everybody else is
the outer layer. Are you the closest to
me? And And that of course, they soften
their hearts
The point is that when
this division became public,
some people didn't like it at all. So
in this story here,
one of them he said,
So this man now he says, this division
is not based on justice
and was not intended to win the pleasure
of Allah.
He's talking about the
Messenger of Allah.
Now that statement the
rebel of Kufr.
Like how could you accuse
the prophet of
of of this? It's Horrible statement.
What a great what an unbelievable offense.
But the prophet
he said
So he went to the property, told him,
This person said such and such. So the
prophet brought him in.
He
was like what's wrong with you?
The face of the prophet turned red
If I'm not the one who's fair and
just, who else?
Like if I'm not gonna observe that, who
else is gonna be doing this?
He said may Allah have mercy on my
brother Musa.
He was caused more distress than this, but
he remained patient.
Now,
when he heard for that from the prophet
he felt so bad.
He felt so
bad.
He said, I should never convey anything of
this kind to him from the future.
I don't want to cause him any distress.
Like why It's not necessary distress on your
prophet
He didn't take any action,
but it was just distressful for him. Say,
I won't ever do that for the prophet
which also teaches a lesson in jama'ah.
If you know people talk,
you don't have to always convey that to
others.
Hey, this person said this about you. Who
cares?
If there is nothing can be done about
it, just leave it.
Leave it to Allah
Now, am I allowed to retaliate? Am I
allowed to seek justice and investigate and go
to other person like, I heard that you
said this and that about me. Is that
true?
You are.
If you would like to take your hat,
you can. That's alright. You can do that.
But sometimes
hearing statement like this, especially unfair statement like
that, you just leave it.
As Allah
If the foolish speak, just leave it. Just
say peace.
For your own peace of mind, leave
it because you might be going after them
and that doesn't do any except escalating the
situation.
You know it's not fair, you know it's
not just, you know it's not right, so
you have the option to go the route
of justice, which might be long and maybe
difficult,
or just buy your peace of mind and
just, you know what,
let there be. I don't care. I'm confident
enough
of myself and these people, they can say
whatever they want to say. So here's the
prophet
is teaching us this lesson. He got upset.
No doubt about it.
He was angry, his face was turning red.
But did he take any action against this
man? No. Actually there's another narration
in which as the man was leaving, because
he didn't even like the Prophet response either,
so as he was leaving,
Khaled telling the prophet
let me take care of him for you.
Like I'll finish him right now before this
spreads.
And the prophet said, no, no, just leave
him. Let him be.
Then he said, unfortunately, perhaps,
from the like of this person, a generation
will come
that you will belittle your to their
their your dedication to their dedication.
However,
they're only gonna through gonna go through this
faith just like the target
or the arrow goes through the target.
This is how fast they're gonna go through
this deal. Like, they learn nothing.
So, yeah. Some people, unfortunately, just this is
what they like to do, and they're benefiting
nothing from the spirit of faith and the
spirit of, of the deen. Allah protect us
from the
Surabaymi. So, again, how to deal with offensive
people? You have the route of justice,
and you're gonna have to pursue that, that's
gonna be difficult and hard,
or just let it be because I don't
have to worry about it or even actually
waste my time on it. The choice is
yours. May Allah
protect us Any question,
Alright.
You guys are just trying to be safe.