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All praise due to Allah and his praise
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and blessings and peace be upon our Prophet
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Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam His family, his
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companions and his followers until the Day of
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Judgment I bear witness that Allah is the
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only one worthy of worship and Muhammad salallahu
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alayhi wa sallam his last and final messenger.
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My dear brothers and sisters Yaqul al-imam
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al-shatibi rahimahullah mulakhisan maqsadan azeeman min maqasid
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al-shari'ah Yaqul fa inna al-shari
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'ata tad'u ila al-khuruji min da
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'i al-hawa ila da'i al-huda
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He summarized one of the most important goals
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of shari'ah that our religion came to
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free you from being enslaved, controlled by your
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desires to be controlled by the guidance of
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Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala That's very big
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concept and important concept in our religion that
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the person submit to the will and to
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the guidance of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
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not to be following his or her own
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desires Desires which is usually translate the word
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al-hawa in the Qur'an and Sunnah
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mentioned in the Qur'an is like what
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27 or 26 times All of them, every
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time in these 26 times al-hawa, desire
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was mentioned was not mentioned in a positive
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meaning Actually criticized ma dhukra ila madhmuman fala
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tattabi'u al-hawa Don't follow your desires
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an ta'dilu It will lead you not to
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be fair and just fahkum bayna al-nasi
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bil-haqqi wala tattabi'u al-hawa Rule
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between people based on justice, not based on
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desires ara'ayta man ittakhadha ilahahu hawa Have
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you seen those who have taken their desires,
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their God, their Lord balittaba'al ladheena dhalamu
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ahwa'ahum bighayri ilm The transgressor only follow
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their desires with no knowledge And so many
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verses in the Qur'an like this And
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that's something important because We as a human
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being Desire is part of who we are
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It is something in us But al-Islam
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help us, give us tools Allah subhanahu wa
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ta'ala created us and he knows us
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the best And he knows if we submit
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ourselves to our desires We will not succeed
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in this life and the next That's why
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there is so many rules and regulations And
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guide us in Islam in relation to the
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issue of how to deal with the desires
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But today I would like just to comment
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on one concept of al-hawa Which is
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when you not have the ability to have
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a self-control When you don't have the
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ability to govern your own feelings And to
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control your reactions When you lose self-control
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That can be very damaging to you and
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to your relationships with people Your relationship with
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Allah Your relationship with the religion Your relationship
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with your family When you don't know how
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to control yourself And when you know how
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to master this Like somebody said I'm a
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king Why?
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Because I rule myself I know how to
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rule myself I'm in control of myself It
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is hard for me to imagine Someone who
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cannot lead and cannot be in control of
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his own desires How this person expected to
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lead his family To lead a community To
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lead in his organization If you can't have
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a control of yourself And you cannot be
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able to control your reactions And you have
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a self-control How can you have a
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control of others Or other things around you
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You know, the real, the problem really That
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desires has to do with feelings المشكلة تكمن
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في صعوبة ضبط النفس أنها تتعلق بالمشاعر You
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know, you can close your eyes If you
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don't want to see something You can close
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your ear if you don't want to hear
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something I agree with you, it's hard to
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close your mouth If you don't want to
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eat something But you still can do that
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But the problem, you have a control over
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these senses But the problem with self-control
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That basically, it comes from your heart You
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don't have the ability to close your heart
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You can control your eyes, you can close
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your eyes Your ear, your basically, your mouth
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But you can't close your heart These feelings,
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you don't have that control over That's why
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it requires from the person A great deal
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of effort and mastering that That's why Nabi
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Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam Praise those who are able
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to do that To control that desire, to
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control their feelings فَأَمَّا مَنْ خَافَ مَقَامَ رَبِّهِ
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وَنَهَى النَّفْسَ عَنِ الْهَوَى فَإِنَّ الْجَنَّةَ هِيَ الْمَأْوَى
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Those who fear Allah and control their desires
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Al-Jannah is the reward لَا تَغْضَبُ لَكَ
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الْجَنَّةَ Don't be angry and Al-Jannah is
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your reward لَيْسَ الشَّدِيدُ بِالسُّرْعَةِ إِنَّمَا الشَّدِيدِ الَّذِي
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يَمْلِكُ نَفْسَهُ And Nabi Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said
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The strong person is not the one with
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big muscles Who can wrestle with people No,
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the strong person is the one who can
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control himself In a time of anger مَنْ
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حَجَّ فَلَمْ يَرْفُثْ وَلَمْ يَفْسُقْ رَجَعَكَ يَوْمِ وَلَدَتْهُ
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أُمُّهُ Those who go to hajj and control
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themselves Control their reactions, control their feelings Because
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that feeling will lead to actions When you
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control that, you come back from hajj Without
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committing any type of rafath or fusuq Ya
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'ni sins or arguing or using bad words
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Or losing your control and anger You come
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back as if the same day you were
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born Ya'ni free of sins That sort
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of control over your emotions Is something so
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important Emotions like what?
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Like anger, like love It's a very strong
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emotion But how can you control that love?
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Not to let your love for something lead
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you to do something haram Fear, it's a
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very strong emotion How can you make your
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fear control?
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Hurt, hurt is a very strong feeling But
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guess what?
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Those who are hurt can hurt others as
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well While they are feeling that they are
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hurt so much You know?
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Jealous, it's a very strong feeling How can
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you control that jealousy?
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So it will not turn to be something
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negative The lust, the sexual lust Is a
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very strong feeling as well But how can
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you control that so it will not lead
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you to haram?
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إِنَّ مَنْ لَمْ يُحْسِنِ السَّيْطَرَ عَلَى مَشَاعِرِهِ قَدَتْهُ
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إِلَى الْمُهْلِكَاتِ Those who cannot have a control
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over their feelings Definitely it will turn them
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to their destruction You know?
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The happiness of a man in this life
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Does not consist of the absence But in
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the mastery of his or her passions When
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you can master your feeling That would bring
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happiness, bring peace to your life And it
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is allowed for you to be sad It's
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allowed for you to be angry It's good
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to be angry sometimes It's good to be
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sad sometimes Or you know, it's good to
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be jealous sometimes These feelings are not completely
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bad But when you don't control them When
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they got out of control That's when they
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become bad Otherwise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
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said زِيِّنَا لِلنَّاسِ يَحِبُّوا الشَّهَوَاتِ It's a natural
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thing to have the desire For the opposite
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gender The love for wealth, the love for
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fame You know?
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It is a natural thing to be angry
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فَلَمَّا ذَهَبَ عَن مُوسَى الْغَضَبِ When Musa became
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angry إِنِّي رُزِقْتُ حُبَّهَا I am in love
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with her يقول النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم
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Love is not a bad thing سَاد إِنَّ
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الْخَلْبَ لَيَحْزَنُ I'm sad over the death of
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my son He said صلى الله عليه وسلم
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But the point is to be able to
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control these feelings And not to let it
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control you Because if you don't control it
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It will lead to things that you will
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regret And it can be a long term
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effect for you And sharia have given us
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Certain guidelines in this regard One of it
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is your ability to transfer these feelings From
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00:09:01
being negative to something positive Make sure that
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00:09:04
you channel your anger To be something that
00:09:04 -->
00:09:07
will be productive Channel your sadness to be
00:09:07 -->
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something to be productive To learn and to
00:09:09 -->
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grow from these feelings Also, make sure that
00:09:14 -->
00:09:17
Whenever you want to deal with self control
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It's so important to mature up Immaturity is
00:09:21 -->
00:09:25
unbelievable reason For people to lose control And
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to hurt others and to hurt themselves And
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00:09:29
I see that sometimes When we see the
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reaction of people When something, a calamity happen
00:09:33 -->
00:09:37
Or a disaster happen So immaturity, just anything
00:09:37 -->
00:09:40
You know, just recently talking to someone Oh,
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00:09:43
it wasn't very immature for me to say
00:09:43 -->
00:09:46
that And that's so often I hear that
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00:09:48
That people, you know, don't know how to
00:09:48 -->
00:09:52
grow up Especially when their emotions are so
00:09:52 -->
00:09:54
tense You have to know how to deal
00:09:54 -->
00:09:56
with things with wisdom And to make sure
00:09:56 -->
00:10:00
that you deal with it with maturity Also,
00:10:00 -->
00:10:04
some people, I believe They need kind of
00:10:04 -->
00:10:07
professional help Seek professional help If you have
00:10:07 -->
00:10:10
an extreme anger, can't control You should look
00:10:10 -->
00:10:12
to a therapy Or look at program to
00:10:12 -->
00:10:15
help you to master your anger Or your
00:10:15 -->
00:10:19
reactions Basically, your violence If it reach to
00:10:19 -->
00:10:22
that level May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
00:10:22 -->
00:10:24
help us And to make us always in
00:10:24 -->
00:10:27
control of ourselves أقول ما سميتم أستغفر الله
00:10:27 -->
00:10:34
لي ولكم باستغفره الحمد لله وحده والصلاة والسلام
00:10:34 -->
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على من لا نبي بعده I think one
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00:10:38
of the most important point that I would
00:10:38 -->
00:10:41
like to end with it Is the issue
00:10:41 -->
00:10:46
of, for self-control Control your tongue No
00:10:46 -->
00:10:49
matter what is emotions going inside you Learn
00:10:49 -->
00:10:53
how to control your tongue And you deal
00:10:53 -->
00:10:55
with your emotions later But don't open your
00:10:55 -->
00:11:01
mouth And if you have to Just make
00:11:01 -->
00:11:04
sure you tune it down It was said
00:11:04 -->
00:11:08
once, Churchill One of his rival, she was
00:11:08 -->
00:11:13
a member in the In the British House
00:11:13 -->
00:11:17
of Commons Her name was, I think Lady
00:11:17 -->
00:11:21
Astor or something like that In a heated
00:11:21 -->
00:11:25
debate, she told him You know what, if
00:11:25 -->
00:11:27
I was your wife I would put a
00:11:27 -->
00:11:31
poison in your soup Then he smiled and
00:11:31 -->
00:11:33
he said If I was your husband, I
00:11:33 -->
00:11:41
would have drink it And just he ended
00:11:41 -->
00:11:43
the whole thing And everybody started laughing and
00:11:43 -->
00:11:47
things passed That's a control, you might laugh
00:11:47 -->
00:11:49
at that But that's a mastery of controlling
00:11:49 -->
00:11:54
your tongue That's a mastery of controlling himself
00:11:55 -->
00:11:57
And not let himself to go lose it
00:12:00 -->
00:12:02
And this is an important thing that you
00:12:02 -->
00:12:04
need to learn And we need to learn
00:12:04 -->
00:12:08
Don't allow yourself to start backbite Accusing people
00:12:09 -->
00:12:12
Saying bad words, cursing or making things or
00:12:12 -->
00:12:16
lying Just because there is a tense emotion
00:12:16 -->
00:12:19
Because you're so scared, you're so afraid And
00:12:19 -->
00:12:21
you start saying things that you might regret
00:12:21 -->
00:12:25
in the future You wanna need help with
00:12:25 -->
00:12:27
losing your tongue And remember, whatever you say,
00:12:27 -->
00:12:29
Allah will ask you about Allah will ask
00:12:29 -->
00:12:31
you about what you say, not what you
00:12:31 -->
00:12:33
didn't say Remember, the Prophet s.a.w.
00:12:33 -->
00:12:37
said Say good or remain silent A lot
00:12:37 -->
00:12:39
of people think that they have to say
00:12:39 -->
00:12:41
something Especially in the world of social media
00:12:41 -->
00:12:43
today Everybody think that I have to make
00:12:43 -->
00:12:45
an opinion I have to make a statement
00:12:46 -->
00:12:51
You don't have to Also, make sure that
00:12:51 -->
00:12:53
you reduce the amount of talk Make sure
00:12:53 -->
00:12:55
that you mention Allah before you open your
00:12:55 -->
00:13:02
mouth I've seen a wonder from Sheikh Ibn
00:13:02 -->
00:13:04
Baz One of my teachers Anytime he want
00:13:04 -->
00:13:06
to open his mouth and talk Especially if
00:13:06 -->
00:13:08
somebody made him angry He make a lot
00:13:08 -->
00:13:11
of dhikr and istighfar Then he will talk
00:13:11 -->
00:13:16
before he speaks Remember, not only to say
00:13:16 -->
00:13:19
the right thing in the right place But
00:13:19 -->
00:13:25
far more difficult to leave unsaid wrong things
00:13:25 -->
00:13:30
at the tempting moment Remember, sometimes the resistance
00:13:30 -->
00:13:34
of making your point Make you win a
00:13:34 -->
00:13:49
lot of points Allahumma
00:13:49 -->
00:13:51
inna nas'aluka an tuhsina khitamana wa an
00:13:51 -->
00:13:54
taghfira dhunubana wa an tarhama da'afana wa
00:13:54 -->
00:13:57
an tajbura kasrana Allahumma inna nas'aluka an
00:13:57 -->
00:13:59
tarhama ikhwanana al mustadha'afina fi biladi al
00:13:59 -->
00:14:02
sham wa fi filistina khasatan yadha al jalali
00:14:02 -->
00:14:04
wa al ikram wa ghazata ya arhama al
00:14:04 -->
00:14:08
rahimin irhamhum bi rahmatik Allahumma irhamhum bi rahmatik
00:14:08 -->
00:14:11
wa aafihim bi aafiyatik Allahumma ajil lahum bil
00:14:11 -->
00:14:13
faraj ya hayya qayyum Allahumma inna nas'aluka
00:14:13 -->
00:14:17
an taghfira liwalidina Allahumma aghfir liwalidina Allahumma aghfir
00:14:17 -->
00:14:20
liwalidina ya ahya'a wa amwata Allahumma ahdina
00:14:20 -->
00:14:22
wa ahdi azwajana wa awladana wa dhurriyatina li
00:14:22 -->
00:14:24
kulli khayr wa abid a'anna sharr al
00:14:24 -->
00:14:26
fitani maa dhahra minha wa maa batan wa
00:14:26 -->
00:14:28
aslih wa laa ta'umur al muslimin wa
00:14:28 -->
00:14:30
man wallaytahu amrana yadha al jalali wa al
00:14:30 -->
00:14:32
ikram wa laa taj'alna fitnatan lilqawm al
00:14:32 -->
00:14:36
dhalimin Allahumma ahina muslimin wa amitna muslimin ya
00:14:36 -->
00:14:40
hayyu ya qayyum anzir rahmatika wa barakatika wa
00:14:40 -->
00:14:42
ghinaaka wa lutfika ala hadha al masjidi wa
00:14:42 -->
00:14:44
ahlihi wa jaliyatina ya arhama al rahimin wa
00:14:44 -->
00:14:48
ahfazna bihifdika ya qawiyu ya aziz wa salli
00:14:48 -->
00:14:50
wa sallim wa barik ala nabiyyina muhammad wa
00:14:50 -->
00:14:53
ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallim tasliman kathira
00:14:53 -->
00:14:56
And today, my brothers and sisters of Friday
00:14:56 -->
00:14:58
Nabi salallahu alayhi wa sallam encouraged us to
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00:15:01
increase our salat wa salam ala rasulillah so
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00:15:04
increase your salat rasulillah until the maghrib time
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00:15:07
Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala nabiyyina
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00:15:09
muhammad wa alihi wa sahbihi wa qumu lill
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00:15:16
salat ya rahmankumullah Al Fatiha
