Tom Facchine – Muslims Should STOP Doing This

			Sometimes we want to give advice to other people. But in reality, it's just about anxiety, right? We
give or we give advice from a place of anxiety. Okay? You might know a hadith, right? You don't
understand the fact of it. You don't understand the other Hadith of the issue. But you know that
you've heard it, said, Bellinger, and me, Annie will write, like, relayed from me, or spread it from
me share it from me, even if it's just one verse, And you interpret this to mean that any little
piece of information and knowledge that you have, you have to share it, you know, come what may no
matter what the reaction is, no matter your relationship with the person no matter what, okay? And
		

			then you have this sort of anxiety, you're thinking, well, if I don't share this, then what's going
to happen to me on the day of judgment, maybe I'm going to be held accountable, I didn't share this
sort of thing, you know, look at all the anxiety that has piled up on top of you. And so then you
you say what you have to say, it's not taken well, the person kind of rejects it, or they're like,
who are you? I don't know, you whatever. And then you say, Well, you know what, at least I delivered
the message and you walk away and you're kind of content with yourself. And I'd like to challenge
that model. I don't think that's the model of giving advice that we need to be going for. I think
		

			that that does not demonstrate the proper loyalty that's in the term to see her at the prophets of
Allah Allah. He was salam said in Edina, Nestle Ha is that the religion is not see her and then they
said According a little man who to who is this no see her, Allah, Allah and He said to Allah, so for
those who are translating to see her as advice, you run into a problem right away. How do you give
advice to Allah? Right? Then he said after the law, holy Kitabi and to His revelation. Now the
problem how do you give advice to Allah's revelation? Well, the Rasul Allah He another problem, how
do you give advice to the messenger? Salallahu Alaihe Salam, you can't, right. So let's see how it
		

			is not just advice. Now see how it is about loyalty and sincerity right? Yeah, if Allah Dena avenue
to Allah Toba 10. So returned to a law with sincere repentance with repentance is based out of your
loyalty to a law and your sincerity to him. Okay. And so we talk about nnessee how the time but it's
not just advice. It's not advice. Advice is one of the fruits of Naseeha advice is one of the
consequences of no see her but let's see how it is really about loyalty and loyalty is much more
comprehensive, because now you're talking about okay, this is how we apply the Hadith not one of you
truly believes until you love for your brother, what you'd love for yourself. If I was in that
		

			person's position, how would I want to be treated? Maybe I got caught out doing something awkward.
Maybe I got put in an awkward situation. Maybe I'm a daddy, maybe I'm a scholar or student knowledge
and I was invited to some sort of interfaith event and then something awkward happened. And I was
already there. And maybe I didn't respond in the way that I'm even happy with. Okay, how do we deal
with that person? We put them on blast, do we smear their name right? Do we do all these sorts of
things? Or do we consider hmm, if I were in that situation? How would I want somebody to respond to
me? How would I eat let's say I met I made a mistake. Let's say I made a misstep. How would I want
		

			somebody to guide me back to the truth or to show me the right way? Okay, and that's why we get this
wrong when we think about oh, well does it have to be in private can it be in public he said it in
public he did it in public and via forget about that you're working on barely permissible. You're
not working with SN we're talking about SN here what most demonstrates your loyalty and sincerity to
this individual. Did you pray for them once did you pray for their guidance once How can you tell
that this is sincerity and not an ego trip for you feeling like you know something better that
you're able to put yourself above this person? They're so they're so misguided? May Allah guide
		

			them? Right. Sheikh Abdullah used to call us out on us all the time. He said like at the end. So May
Allah guide you, who are you to talk about other people needing Allah's guidance, you need Allah's
guidance more than anybody else, right? So it's about ascent, okay, in the sea Ha, loyalty, having
loyalty to people. If you're loyal to somebody, you're going to think carefully about how to
approach them, you're going to think about what's going to motivate them, you're going to think
about trying to guide them in a beautiful way. And you're probably going to make really sure that
you know what you're talking about, or at least involve somebody who surely knows what they're
		

			talking about. So when we're giving our quote unquote, advice to people, are we really fulfilling
all of these goals? are we checking all these boxes? Are we acting out of anxiety in haste? Or are
we demonstrating loyalty and care? Usually the first usually we're demonstrating anxiety and haste
and it's a weak Hadith and the prophesy Saddam but many scholars refer to it as the meaning being
correct. LRG lamina shaytaan is that haste is from the devil, right? And as we say all the time,
like Allah says, in the end of Surah, to the calf, who's the Biggest Loser on a day of judgment, the
biggest loser is the person who was doing evil and they thought that they were doing good, right. So
		

			it's not enough to have just a good intention. You have to have care. You have to demonstrate your s
and demonstrate your sincerity. Demonstrate your loyalty to your fellow Muslim by putting yourself
in their shoes and trying to exercise care when you're trying to give advice or guide them to the
right way.