Tom Facchine – Marriage in Islam – Half our Deen
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of marriage in worship, including that it is a part of worship and that children will be punished for abandoning their parents' children. They also emphasize the responsibility of marriage and the importance of showing faith in one's spouse's actions. The segment emphasizes the need to show pride and appeal to the devil's appeal and faith in their spouse's actions, as it is a responsibility of the father.
AI: Summary ©
Today shall watada We will resume our series on sort of putting this off that we have paused at the end of July.
In this section of the chapter beginning Around the Verse number 53, Allah azza wa jal begins to talk about a shame on the devil.
He prepares the people of faith and gives them guidance for how to best to deal with the devils tricks. Then Allah subhana moods are either points out a few case studies to learn from. And finally, a law reassures us that if we put our trust in Him Subhana that He will deliver us from all spiritual harm.
Allah subhanho wa Taala says in verse 53, I'm going to be inviting you all let's see here AXA in their share of the visible beno
in the shape on account and even a setting or whoever will be them. Industry on a Evans like a wave of industry on Academy on Saturday, or lumen. Vina tell them I believing servants to say only what is best, Satan certainly seeks to sow discord among them. Satan is indeed have sworn enemy to mankind.
Allah azza wa jal is setting our expectations and delivering to us critical information regarding the makeup of this universe that we live in. When you're at home with your family. When you're driving in your car, you think that you are alone? No, you're not.
The devil is there too. And he is your enemy. He does not want good for you.
He wants to bring you down.
How does he bring you down?
Allah subhana wa Tada tells us that he brings us down by sowing discord by causing conflicts.
Now there are many types of discord and conflict. The prophets have a long way he was informed us in an authentic hadith that there is one type of discord and conflict that the Devil loves to cause more than any other. And that Discord is between spouses.
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Jabiru probably a lot more and more narrative of the prominence of a lot already he was said, The Devil places his throne or He sets up His headquarters over the water. And then he sends forth his army. The highest in ranks are those who caused the most chaos. Yet even though they are all bound together together. They have given us an opportunity
to go hopefully a couple of times beforehand as an opportunity winning otherworldly and it
all if we get even more, we'll go Luna and it's
one of the ever one of the devil's forces will report back to the devil and say, I did such and such a thing. I call us let's such and such a problem. And the devil himself will respond and say, as nothing.
Then another one will report back and say listen, I didn't leave this guy alone until I crossed him and his wife to divorce.
And the devil will draw that one close and praise Him saying yes you That's it.
The devil places such an importance on marital discord for many, many reasons. One of them is that marriage is one of the most important and sacred relationships that we have.
We can tell that it is important and sacred because of how often it comes up in the forehead and the heavy as well as how often the prophets of Allah already he was commanded that and encouraged us to get married. I don't think that Mr. would really call up on a call let me use of a lot more than he was certain of Yeah, masala Shiva registered on running
phalanges Oh, which woman asked to leave me the song and it never would have done. I've done the ministry and said that the prophets of Allah already here 770 You whoever is able to marry should marry and whoever cannot shoot fast, forever will be a shield for him. In another funny he said
And then there's always room for any more caffeine than before.
Well, that's it for no cut off bending, getting us all get married, since it will make us the most numerous nation on the day of judgment. And don't be like the Christian arts, who as we know, take celibacy are the opposite of marriage as an act of worship? And another funny is cannabis. A lot of us have a lot of our legal system. Yeah, Peruvian.
Well, you don't have an intellectually damaged either.
We have a little taste of what you
tell us otherwise, we will do and we'll do that in the world. And I can't be more careful when people ask me. The the problems of the law while he was us took ordered us to get married and that severely forbidden us from celibacy.
And he would say to us marry love, compassion and childbearing moments so that we become the most numerous nation on the day of judgment.
And you have another friend he said, in the lead talk, the content content, templates, have you been watching him walking it alone, or Jupiter on may have had to leave him in property. Everything that you spend on with the proper intention will be rewarded even a morsel of food that that you've placed in your wife's mouth.
And finally, the proximal is what I once told his companions or whatever father, Gerald Allahu Akbar, managers of the woman with the monthly salary
hasn't
given you enough opportunities for charity, he was talking to the poor of the companions, he said, intimacy with your spouse, is charity.
All these heavy, and many, many, many more, show that getting married is more than just a suggestion. It's more than just the worldly thing. It's more than a piece of paper or a contract.
Marriage is a part of our routine. Marriage is part of worship, and Allah azza wa jal wants us to be married.
Why does a love to hear if we're married or not?
Many of the above a hadith mentioned the connection between marriage and children. And this connection is no accident. It's not discriminating against people who can't have children, or even people who choose not to have children. But the fact of the matter is that children will be bored. There's no way around it. And of all the revelation that we have, and all of the data that we have, and all of the inherited wisdom that we have agreed and emphasize that the best outcomes for children happen when they are raised in a household with their two biological parents who are married to each other
to biological parents, because they tend to to feel more duty bound to their own flesh and blood.
Married because they have a greater incentive to work out their problems, instead of just running away and abandoning the kids in times of difficulty. Are there exceptional circumstances? Yes, of course. And this common law accounts for those exceptional circumstances, we are supposed to take care of orphans as if they were our own children. We are supposed to take care of our stepchildren as if they were our own children.
But exceptions are not a substitute for the norm. You cannot build a society on exceptions.
The modern world has lost the plot on this one. You need this to be the bedrock of society generation after generation to biological parents who are married to each other. Anyone who's advocating for another arrangement or another model doesn't really care about the children.
They are thinking selfishly, and are deluded by their own desire.
Children are an enormous responsibility. It's not all fun.
And the devil wants us to cut ties and run away from that responsibility.
Whereas ALLAH SubhanA wa Tala wants us to lean into that responsibility. And let it work on us and let it make us better people.
This is the second reason Allah azza wa jal once you in this relationship of marriage because it gives you the single greatest opportunity to develop and improve yourself.
Marriage
is about accountability. It's about responsibility. You can't go anywhere, at the end of the day you go home to your spouse, and whatever mess you made in the morning,
you're going to have to clean it up in the evening.
The ego does not like this.
The ego wants to run away. The ego wants to avoid responsibility. And the devil exploits this by appealing to our egos.
And so you come home after work, and maybe dinner is not ready,
where the house was a mess, or you tried to share something with your spouse that is meaningful to you, or tell them about your day, and they don't seem interested. Boom, here comes the devil. With his suggestions, she doesn't appreciate you. He doesn't really care how you feel. And these suggestions never existed in the courtship stage before you were married. Because the devil didn't care about sabotaging your relationship until it became a marriage.
So the devil comes with these suggestions. And then the devil brings the evidence and all of a sudden, you can remember every single example that supports that suggestion. Remember, when this happened? Remember when they did this, or they did not do that it was the same story. It's always been the same story.
The devil tries to emphasize what we are owed,
and not what we owe.
He wants us to only see what the other person needs to work on.
Not what we have to work on.
Next, the devil gets us to compare ourselves to others.
It's not like this in their family. They have such a happy marriage. They're always so sweet and appreciative of each other, this person that I only see for a few hours a week at their house or MSG, or even worse on television, or social media. They have better than me. Why can't I have a marriage like there's
finally, the devil fills us with many desires.
I need to get out of this marriage. I deserve more. I can do better on my own. And may Allah Tada help us if we have a specific someone else in mind.
The devil will have us believing that this new potential spouse is perfect. Satan is the most attractive the most virtuous person on the face of the earth with no faults and no problems or shortcomings.
Just as the devil will have us believing that our current spouse is toxic and the narcissist etc, etc.
The devil wants us to believe that the grass is greener on the other side.
And the loss of honey Boitano wants us to realize that usually, usually the grass was greener where the water is.
We're used to thinking about hardship and marriage as a test. And that's true. But calling it a test can get us thinking that the only thing to do is to be patient.
And in marriage, that's just not the case. There's so much more to do than be patient.
We have to work on ourselves. And that means more than just developing our virtues like gratitude, which is important. But more important than that is working on our intention.
Marriage is a reality check off hard lesson that you can't ever really control another person.
And at the end of the day, all you can control is yourself.
If you are under the illusion that you can control your spouse that you will end up like fit around that we talked about just a few weeks ago, who tried to use his favors to most to control him.
Does that happen our marriages? You bet. I wash your clothes. I go to work all day I make your meals. So you should do this thing for me.
If the devil can get us into transaction mode into accounting mode, he's the one who's winning not us.
Because transaction mode accounting role is usually adopted
And it's usually about the ego. Allah azza wa jal did not make marriage about the ego. He made it for sincerity. It takes faith. It takes faith to realize that a loss of habitat honor controls the hearts. Just like a lot of restaurants that have placed love for baby Musa are in the heart of Finau
and his spouse,
Allah azza wa jal to transform your spouse into the most amazing, considerate, thoughtful, supportive spouse that you can imagine you can do it.
And the way to accomplish that isn't to guilt trip them,
or to dangle the favors you do over their head, in an attempt to get them to reluctantly pay you back.
It's to worship Allah azza wa jal through your package
is to worship Allah subhanho wa Taala through the service of your spouse, it's to be in business with Allah azza wa jal, not with the creation. That's why marriage is half of our deed. That's why it's such a gold mine of potential reward in the afterlife. And that's why the devil wants to ruin it for you.
Because if you can act sincerely in your marriage, sincerely for a law, which is difficult, that you can act sincerely for Allah azza wa jal in every part of your life, and those who are sincere for a loss of common ones are bound for genuine. I'm going to call the high level stuff for the love and the mother football is having difficulty with that person who in an audible about.
How can we learn the art of an accent? Well, sure. You think he wants you?
To even be shopping? Why should the man proceed and that will happen and aren't the whole sort of a derivative of wanting some of the loved one a lot earlier he was having he was when he was sending to Steven
Paul or Lindsay to hear if you can share Barney and renewable energy on a candidate and certainly I do plan to be in
town I believe in servants to say only what is best. Satan certainly seeks to sow discord among them. Satan is indeed a sworn enemy to mankind.
Discord and marriage is just one type of discord that the devil tries to spread. Another very dangerous type of Discord is among the Muslim community,
the province of Allah while he was
comparing us to the parts of a building that reinforce each other, and he, I mean, most of the nationality of the long run, although some of the lights go off on a new cylinder, but we only hope we can get it shipped to her as a Gandalf was younger when I saw
that building that we form of when we support each other, it's it's many things. It's a food pantry for the poor. It's a safe house for the week. It's a school for those who want to learn, it's a sanctuary for those who want to worship, it's honor for those who have been humiliated. It's peace, for those who are running from anxiety. That is what we have to offer the world as Muslims. This is what happens when the Muslims are strong. When the Muslims work together. This is when we can build a fair and equitable society like the loss of kind of autonomous driving, so it'd be so
cool to be with this digital. But
what about those who haven't been in need? Or want to be there? You know what I mean? If we're running and overthinking a lot, a lot. Oh, that'd be human. But I tell you how tempting Oh, believers can stand firm for justice as witnesses for a lot, even if it's against yourselves, even if it's against your parents, even if it's against your close relatives, whether they're rich or poor, Allah azza wa jal is the best to ensure their interests. So don't let your desires cause you to deviate from what is just
when the Muslims are sincere. When the righteous are in charge, everyone is happy, except the wicked.
Do you think the devil wants this? Or do you think he wants to
tear down everything that we build it together pillar by pillar until the weekend the for our pray for the ruthless and definitely one is scattered, alone and vulnerable to the devil's suggestions.
How will the devil do?
One of the tried and true methods of the devil is to pump us up with pride and appeal to our ambition. The devil has been using this trick since the time of Adam. I mean,
how did he tricked out of mind as an architect needing from the very same tree that a lot of us have a job forbidding him from?
by appealing to his ambition, the ambition of a higher status on a man the half a mile on having children naughty? No, let me check on that again. Oh 518 fit a pastor in the local Metal had been at NASA train, but the love the guru.
He said Your Lord has permitted this treaty to you, only to prevent you from becoming angels or immortal.
And he swore to them. I'm truly your sincere advisor. So he brought up out there fall through this deception.
On Monday, he said that I was tempted by the higher status of being an angel or being immortal. So he entertained the devil's appeal, and ultimately listening to him.
Do you think that we're more prepared that Adam? I think he's gonna
What will you do? When the titles and the accolades start coming your way? This can happen even MSG. You may think that you're doing good, you might think that you're serving a loss of power, mozzarella and Isabella at the MSG and and the whole time that devil is taking care of good intentions, and sabotaging your work. Getting your ego involved.
This happened happens when the success of everyone becomes personal.
All of a sudden, it's fine messaging, my program by position by donation. Don't you know who I am? That's my start.
You feel entitled to be treated a certain way because the devil has puffed you up with pride. It's not about the glory, it will also find out anymore. It's about your personal glory.
Don't you know what I also found taller senators have done with Africa said you ought to have been Latina. I really want to figure out what if I said I came from
the eternal home and the hereafter also kind of without the only gives us for those who do not see supremacy on this earth. For corruption. The ultimate outcome belongs to the righteous supremacy is a level as
not possible. The machine is not at
the mercy belongs to Allah. If we really want to serve the best team, the first thing we need to do is humble ourselves and not let the devil sway us after we had started out with good intentions.
Another method that definitely uses this to scare us
to threaten us with poverty and harm in order to get us to betray each other as brothers and sisters. And in order to get us to disobey Allah subhana wa Tada. Allah azza wa jal says a che coming up behind the way according to the fascia will love will not filter in who was out there last year and I mean,
the devil threatens you with the prospect of poverty and bends you to shameful deeds, while Allah azza wa jal promises you forgiveness and bounty from him and the law. So my job is all bountiful and all knowing
the devil threatens us with poverty.
If you don't do this, you won't be able to feed your children. You won't be able to keep a roof over your head. You won't be able to send your kids to college and sell the drugs and alcohol take forever miss the prayer.
You don't think the devil uses our good intentions as parents against us.
Think again,
was fairly confident and worthy while they were in the home when they're younger sleep on it.
manipulate them in their wealth of children and make them promises but the devil promises that are nothing but delusion.
We cannot build our own personal success off the backs of others. That's not the way
If we can't make our livelihood at the expense of the people around us, muster or otherwise, if we do, we might achieve a comfortable life. But we will have earned the name of Allah subhanho wa Taala in the process and we will have turned to everyone else against us.
Allah azza wa jal promised us bounty Hello, and abundance. There's nothing really to fear. We must stay the course obey Allah be united contributes to our communities and be ready to resist the devil when he tries to come between us. The muscle that was sitting on me Can I have a full proper container to fall in love over the
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