Taimiyyah Zubair – Taleem al Quran 2012 – P21 212D Tafsir Luqman 14-15
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The speakers discuss the importance of gratitude in relationships between father and mother, as it is a fundamental strength for everyone. They stress the importance of one not being grateful until they are good to their parents and the need for parents to be perfect in their job and not obey their children. They also touch on the struggles of the low-pressure world and the importance of respecting parents.
AI: Summary ©
Now Allah subhanaw taala says, well, we'll sign that And We have enjoined Al Insana, the human being be wily, they he would both his parents. Now these are not the words of Lachlan. Okay, the speech of milkman will continue after a couple of verses, but in the middle Allah subhanaw taala is teaching us something. This is known as Joomla mortadella. You know, for example, you're narrating something, but in the middle, you interrupt and you add something else.
Why do you do that? Because it's essential, it's necessary, you have to mention that point over there. So a final insana be wildly they he, we have enjoined upon man with his parents. What is it that Allah has enjoined upon man? What is it that he should do with his parents? It's not mentioned directly here. It comes later on. And that is gratitude, good treatment, and it could legally validate. Why is it that man should be good towards his parents? Allah subhanaw taala gives a reason how my lad who she carried him, OMA, who his mother Wagnon weakness, Allah whining upon weakness. Why is it that every person must be good with his parents, because the mother carried him how
weakness upon weakness, the word one is from the root letters, well, her noon, one, and that means weakness, feebleness, it's basically dwarf Philomel in one's action, in one's affair, also in one's bones. So she grows in her weakness, as the pregnancy progresses, she bears hardship, upon hardship, as the pregnancy continues, it only grows her in weakness, diminishing her strength, if you think about it, you know, many women all their lives have never taken any supplements, ever. But what happens as they get pregnant, they have to take supplements on a daily basis. Why because their iron reserves are very, very low. Right? Calcium, I mean, so many things, they just go down. So one Allah
one difficulty upon difficulty, hardship upon hardship, and this hardship only increases the woman, the mother in weakness. And then when she gives birth, it's not over yet. Allah says Wafi salehoo. And his weaning, meaning the weaning of the child is fear Amin in two years, the word facade facade lamb for Salah literally means to create a distance and facade is used for weaning what is weaning? When a child is taken off of breastfeeding, meaning the mother stops nursing the child. Why is that called fissile? Because it creates a distance between the mother and the baby between the mother and the child? Right? Because if you think about it, when the mother is nursing the child, there is at
least for example, minimum five times minimum six times depending on how frequently she's nursing the child, that she will hold her baby.
But now what happens as he's two years old, he's running around all day, she can leave him, right she's gone to work, she's busy somewhere, the child can spend the whole day without the mother technically. So this creates a gap. So what they saw no more fear. I mean, this weaning isn't how many years two years meaning after birth, she nurses him for two years and two years is a maximum period that a mother again nurse her child. So this is why I initially what is it that Allah has obligated was Saina will slay now what I initially that you will be grateful to, to me to Allah, Wiley, Wiley, Dacre, and to both your parents, ILA yell must lead to me is the destination. Be
grateful to Allah be grateful to the parents? Why? Because their favorites are many. And to Allah is the final destination, so he will recompense you for your kind treatment of your parents. Now, we learned earlier that wisdom is gratitude, right? So many times it happens that when we're thinking about parents, we wonder why should I be grateful?
Right, why should I be grateful I didn't get this. In fact, I suffered in this way I suffered in that way. My parents deprived me of such and such. You know, many times when you ask children about how their parents are and everything, there's a whole list of complaints, right? And many times it's not just the children, it's even adults. When their 30s and their 40s they have a list of complaints against their parents. I'm not saying the parents are perfect human beings. They have no errors. They have their errors, trust me. You don't know the guilt that parents live with.
Every day, the guilt that they live with, I wish I did not say this to my child. I wish I did not do this to my child. I wish I taught him this. I wish I didn't teach him this. These are, you know, normal feelings of parents, right? But what does Allah subhanaw taala teach us over here, a lesson in gratitude, right? That be grateful to your parents for the very fact that your mother gave birth to you, that is enough of a reason that she gave birth to you, she carried you for nine months. And then it wasn't over, she nursed you. So be grateful to your birth mother, be grateful to your biological mother, even if you have no connection with her.
Even if she put you up for adoption, even if you know whatever she did, that is her responsibility. That is her son. Right. But the fact that she gave birth to you, that is enough of a reason that you are grateful to her.
And notice over here, be grateful to validate, right, both your parents. But if you think about whose Air sign has mentioned, the mother's Air sign has mentioned that she carried him. But the thing is that we have to be grateful to both mother and father, because mother carried you because she couldn't carry you without the Father. All right, she couldn't carry you without his support. Without his help without his assistance. The thing is that a person cannot be a good servant of Allah until he is good to his parents. It's not possible.
Because out of all human beings, whose Air sign is the greatest on us, the people that we live amongst, I'm not talking about the prophets all along, and I'm talking about people that we are living amongst it is who our parents. And if we don't acknowledge their favor, can we then acknowledge the favors of Allah.
If we cannot be grateful to those who are in front of us? Can we be grateful to the one who is inlaid when we cannot see.
So gratitude to Allah, you know, being a good servant to Allah, this is impossible, without being a good child. And a good child doesn't mean that your parents are happy with you. They're 100% pleased with you. In the following verses, we'll see how parents can be very upset with you and force you to do what is wrong. Being a good child means that you are grateful to your parents. You acknowledge their favors, but of course, you have your principles, your rules in your life, right? Now, if you think about it, the parents, what is their sign on us? The fact that they're the reason for our existence, right? Allah subhanaw taala made them the sub made them the cause the reason for our
existence. And now notice, both the parents are mentioned, but the mother's Air sign has mentioned. Why? Because the right of the mother is more than that of the Father. And why is that? So? Because her sacrifice is? Is what? Greater from the very beginning? Not just a pregnancy, but even afterwards, not just the birth, but even afterwards? Isn't it? How often does it happen that if a child is crying, and the Father is holding the child and the baby's crying, you'll just say, Oh, he's hungry. Yeah. Nursing. Right? This is how many fathers will just offload the child, you know, I don't know how to change a diaper. I don't know how to do this. He needs you. Right, the baby needs
you. So the mother's sacrifice is definitely greater. And this is why you're familiar with the famous Hadith about how the Prophet sallallahu Sallam advised a man to be good to his mother, your mother, your mother, and then who? Your father.
Oh, I look at these verses. And I'm like, maybe I can't relate so much to the fact that like she gave birth to me. I mean, my mom gave birth to me, and she fed me and stuff. But as a girl, I can relate to the fact that she had to go through all menstrual cycle and like the pain that comes with it. And like as someone who has experienced pain stuck due to it, I can be like, that must have like, killed you. And you could multiply that pain by 1000 times maybe more seriously.
And then, after birth, imagine for how long she is bleeding.
Right? Really, if you think about it, you can relate with it. You don't have to wait to become a mother in order to understand the sacrifices of your mother. Just look at little children. And when they start annoying you and you look for the Mother, where's the mother so I can give the child back to the mother. Think about your mom. She couldn't give you to anybody else.
Right?
So be grateful to your parents and this is one of the heart
Just things to do. You know that it is actually one of the hardest things to do to be grateful to your parents, because we take it for granted. Right? And to say thank you to your parents is sometimes it feels so awkward because you never said it. You've never said it.
You know, for example, for some of us to say to our parents, I love you, you know, thank you so much or whatever, it's so strange because it's just never happened.
But you feel it, you have that emotion. But after that, you have to extend that exercise if you don't do that the gratitude is not complete. So you have to do it, you have to try.
So initially Wiley Wiley, they Lal mostly to me is the return this is something so interesting. Allah subhanaw taala reminds us of the Hereafter over here
herself with Allah. Allah has ordered us to be good with our parents, and he will ask us about our treatment of our parents.
You know, when we do something good to someone, like for example, parents are good to their children. They're expecting that okay, children will help us. You know, when we're older, my child will take care of me.
But children when they're looking after their old parents, for example, what do they expect in return? What can they really can the parents look after them in return? No, no, they can't. So then, who would you expect just out from Who do you expect reward from Allah subhanaw taala and sometimes it happens that you're trying your best to be good to your father to be good to your mother.
Right You're focusing on the positive but they're focusing on the negative what do you do expect aged from WHO? Allah because LA yell must lead to Allah is the returning what in and if Jaha Dhaka, they both strive against you, they do jihad against you.
They're doing jihad against you. For what Allah upon on that to Shreeka you associate be with me meeting with Allah, my dat which laser laka you do not have be of it. Real Money, any knowledge meaning any evidence, any proof, any authority, anything you have no authority to associate partners with Allah, but your parents are forcing you.
They're doing Jihads
you know, to make you do shake with Allah, they're forcing you they're pressuring you with all their might, then what should you do? What should you do? Fella tutor Huma, then do not obey either of them. Home out both mother and father. You do not obey the mother here, even though her right is greater. You do not obey the father here. Even though he is your father, you do not obey them. Obedience in this regard is prohibited. But General goodness is not prohibited. Okay? Obedience and other matters is not prohibited. It's only in which matter in the matter of Schick. And then it's further emphasized while Sahib Houma and accompany them both feet dunya in the world, being in the
life of the world, how ma rufa in appropriate kindness, Sahib whom I saw him from the root letters, so I'd have a Sahaba what is sarebbe?
companionship?
By the way, the word Sahaba? Is it from the same root? Yes, it is. Why are the Sahaba called Sahaba? What's the definition of a Sahabi? What's the definition?
Someone who saw the Prophet sallallahu Sallam and believed in him
any he had some time of Serba with the Prophet salallahu Salam, some kind of companionship, saw him, sat with him, it with him traveled with him for and all of that. There's some SORBA companionship. So Allah says that with your parents saw him whom accompany them, which means spend time with them. Live with them.
Sit with them. Talk to them, Sahib Houma for dunya in the life of this world, Maril rufa in a good way,
in a way that is reasonable. Good, kind.
Very interesting. Fit dunya in the world, because which kind of parents do you think will force their children to do shit Mushnik parents, those who themselves do shit, right? So but still in the world? Isn't there a relationship that Allah subhanaw taala has made between the two? There is so I acknowledge that relationship, even though they're from a different religion, they're doing ship and they hate your Islam. Still, you have to be with them. You have to give them their rights. Do
US don't obey them in matters which are prohibited, otherwise, live with them in appropriate kindness honorably with decency, like Ibrahim on his Sam did. And when he parted from his father, he said to us, though federal law cannot be, I will seek forgiveness for you from my Lord. So even though your son to parents is necessary, what do we learn over here? If the parents tell you to do something wrong, then do not obey the rights of Allah are greater, always, always. So I'm going to be what Casa de la Arne who? He said that four verses were revealed about me. He said the first was when my mother swore she would neither eat nor drink until I left Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam. So Allah the Exalted, revealed, this verse will saw Him whom if it dunya, ma rufa, so don't obey them in this regard. But in worldly matters, keep doing good. That just because they're doing something wrong, you don't have to do wrong in return. If they're being back to you, you don't do bad in return. Just don't listen to them when they tell you to do something wrong. Otherwise, always be good. Generally, what happens if somebody is treating us in a wrong way? What do we think it's justified for us to
do wrong in return? But over here, we see that their error does not justify your bad treatment of them. Do not even let idol worship be an excuse for you to be bad to your parents. Now think about it. If the parents are righteous, then is there any excuse to be bad to them?
If the parents are righteous, is there any reason to be back to them then is there any justification? No, there isn't.
A smack Vince of the bucket well below her and her her mother was a mushfiqur. All right, when she came to visit her in Medina, and she wanted to stay with her she was also expecting some kind of, you know, good treatment from a schmuck. So I smell a little too low on her. She didn't let her mother in in her house. Imagine that you're emotionally QCA. You're not welcome. She went to the Prophet sallallahu Sallam to ask, What should I do? And the Prophet sallallahu sallam said slowly omake Be good to your mother maintain the sky with her. Let her in have her stay with you be good to her? That yes, she's a Mystica. But her status as a mother is not finished just because she's in
wishmaker. You understand?
Now think about it. We don't forgive our parents sometimes because of something wrong that they have done to us or to somebody else. Shake is which kind of world which kind of wrong, the greatest the worst? Even if parents are doing schicke still Allah says Sahiba who Macedonia Maruka? What if the parents are not doing shit? What if it's a sin lesser than schicke? What if it's the sin of riba for example, or Zina for example, or any other major sin, lying for example, what happens is that we think parents have to be perfect human beings, perfect human beings.
As if a person is you know, 30 years old, or 40 years old, they just have no faults left in them, they have to become an angel. And then when we see the faults in our parents, all of a sudden we have no respect for them. Allah subhanaw taala teaches us over here that we must have respect for our parents, even though they may have errors in them. They may have faults in them we see those faults. So for example, we might see in our parents that for instance, they're rude. They don't have good o'clock they don't speak politely. They're not honest. They're this they're that it doesn't matter. Their faults are for them. Our duties are for us what is our duty as children saw him who
Macedonia Mustafa be with them in the world in a good way. But in terms of religion, who should be your role model? What the beer and follow Sabina way of who man of the one who an Abba Ilya, the one who has returned to me an Abba from their letters, new Alba, Inaba, what does Inaba mean, to return.
So the one who has returned to Allah, meaning the one whose goal in life
is Allah's pleasure, who's striving towards Allah, that person his way that is what you have to follow? So my EMR JIRA comm then to me is your return for ona Bo comm then I will inform you be my quantum thermolon of that which we used to do. What do we see over here in religious matters, you follow the way of those who have turned to Allah subhanaw taala you take inspiration from those who are see
King Allah, that how did they deal with such trials? Do what they did, so you too can be successful. Now if you think about it,
the way of Allah, right the way of Allah Subhan Allah, sometimes it is described as the way of Allah and sometimes it is described as the way of the one who has turned to Allah Subhan Allah man and Abba Illya it's the same thing. split off on levena and antifouling it's the same thing.
Right? The Way of Allah the way of Abu Bakr right because Abu Bakr was on the way of Allah same thing, as long as the person is of the moon I mean of those who are blessed so Rafa Medina and unterlagen. Right. So let's look at the example of Abu Bakar Abdullah Warren who How did he deal with such a situation? He was of those who had an Abba Illya who had turned to Allah.
Remember the father Abu Bakar, Abdullah Warren who he didn't embrace Islam until Fatima aka
until the conquest of Makkah. Okay. And the father of Abu Bakr, Abdullah Warren, who was one of the elders of Makkah, he was a you could say the the group of you could say Abu Talib.
Right, the elders, now, a vocal halfa that that was his name, he was not really pleased with the Islam of Abu Bakr, Abdullah Warren. And not just that he wasn't pleased with the fact that obika of lowering who was so charitable, that he was putting his own life in danger to protect the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam that he was practicing Islam and because of that his life was in danger. He was losing his friends. Remember Abu Bakr al de lo Arn who used to pray openly and the machete King prohibited him from that, right of Ibaka low on who wants he was protecting the Prophet sallallahu Sallam and the people beat him up so much that he passed out. Right. And when he regained
consciousness, he was concerned about who the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. Then Bilal radula, on who who bought his freedom, who set him free, Abu Bakr Al Ghul, or no and Bilal was not the only slave that Abu Bakr bought and set free many slaves. So we'll look at the low man who had a lot of money, but his money was basically decreasing because of Islam. And his father did not like that. And in so to lay at the end of sort of lay, while a sofa, yerba, we learned about Abu Bakar at the lower end who that his father used to criticize his spending. So he used to say that if you are going to buy slaves and set them free, you might as well set those slaves free, who are strong, who can actually
benefit you in some way. What is Bilal going to do for you? What are these guys gonna do for you, they can do nothing.
So Abu Bakr, Abdullah, Lauren, who he replied that I'm not doing this to get something in return from the slaves, I'm doing this to get returned from WHO? Allah subhanaw taala. So Allah who revealed wala Silva, Yoruba, that Allah will be pleased.
And welcome to the low iron who when he did hijra,
what happened? His father came to his house. And he was really upset that ovoca had left. And he said, your father had so much money, he must have taken it with him. What has he left for you? Nothing. So a smile, although on her a younger at that time, she said no.
Our father left a lot of money for us.
And she got a whole lot of pebbles, because he was blind he couldn't see. And she let him touch those that look. Our father left money for us. Okay. Anyway, I'm not discussing whether that's right or wrong. The point here is that Abu Bakar his father was not pleased with me because Islam.
He was not pleased. But what did Abu Bakar Abdullah and who do?
What did he do? Did he stopped his Islam because of his father? No. Did he stop his Ahmed Saleh because of his father? Did he stopped his sadaqa because of his father? No, he didn't. But at the same time, he was good to his father to the best of his ability. And this is what we need to remember also.
You have your principles, you have your rules, you have your goals, and you want to achieve them.
Do it
but don't forget to respect your parents along the way. You may disagree with them, but disagreement does not mean that it has to be turned into disrespect.
So over here in these verses, what do we see? Though hate is emphasized. Risala is emphasized sebelah man and Abba Illya and that is the prophets and then also Acuras emphasized.
Now, in the following verses, look bands advice, it continues. Let's listen to the recitation. What was slain
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I want you to think about something your parents do that, or say that you don't agree with your heart doesn't agree with it, your brain doesn't agree with it. You don't like it, you got offended by it. Think about it, write it down. Cover it. Okay, you know the way you punch the code for your debit card, and you put your hand on the sides of the person next to you can't see it. So in that way covered and write it down.
Just write a word or two, you don't have to write a whole paragraph even though you might want to.
What's the solution to this? Whatever it is that you don't like?
What do we learn in these ayat? What do we have to do?
Especially if we're facing it on a daily basis, what do we have to do?
What did you understand from the verses? That if your parents are telling you to do something as bad as shit?
What does Allah subhanaw taala teach us led to their Houma and secondly, Sahib Houma fifth dunya ma ruva.
Right. Now ask yourself, Is it really something that's wrong? Islamically
what you wrote down? Is it something wrong? Islamically
if it isn't, just cut it out, crush it out, you know,
literally scribble over it.
And tell yourself, it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter because it's not as bad as Schick.
Isn't, Is it as bad as check? No, it isn't. So a fair shake. Allah is telling us still be good to the parents than what about what we're dealing with? Do we still have to be good to our parents? Good.
Now what you wrote, please destroy it, rip it out, or scribble over it? And tell yourself, it's okay.
Their deeds are for them. And my deeds are for me.
They're responsible as parents, and I am responsible as a child. At the end. It al mostly to Allah is the return and I have to answer him. He will ask me not about what my parents did, but about what I did to my parents. Each person will be asked about what he was supposed to do. So let's worry about our own faults.
Now write down something about yourself about yourself that your parents do not like.
Don't tell me
write it down. What is it that offends them?
What is it that hurts them?
What is it that disappoints them?
About Me?
And now tell yourself, I have to fix this.
What my parents do, I don't need to worry about that. What I do, I need to fix that.
I have to work on this. Because this is what I will be asked about.
Okay,
so in the advice of Lachman, while look man is talking to his son in the middle Allah subhanaw taala tells us something. And over here the ground rules are set pay heed to the advice of your parents. Remember their rights but also remember that the rights of Allah are greater.
So chronicle long behind the eye shadow Allah ilaha illa Anta, a stockbroker to retake a Salam or aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.