Taimiyyah Zubair – Taleem al Quran 2012 – P21 212C Tafsir Luqman 13
AI: Summary ©
The importance of gratitude and learning from past experiences is emphasized, along with the benefits of regular gratitude for healing and repair. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of teaching children about the concept of hate and avoiding mistakes. The focus on positive and small small actions is also emphasized.
AI: Summary ©
Look, man, Hakeem, Look, man, the wise.
What is it that Allah subhanaw taala advised him to do? Allah ordered him to be grateful. Allah gave him wisdom. And what was that wisdom that you must be grateful? Grateful to? Who? Allah subhanaw taala? For what?
for everything, for whatever that happens, even things that go against our wishes? Yes. Why? Because Allah subhanaw taala doesn't ever decree anything that is purely evil. Everything that is even hurtful, that may have an evil side to it, that may have something bad about it, even in that attach to that is something good. Which is why many times, you know, when there's something difficult that we come across later on, we call it it was a blessing in disguise, right? That actually it benefited me, it actually helped me it actually shaped me, it actually helped me become a better person or so on and so forth. Right? Even though it was very difficult, it was very painful. But even with that
pain with that difficulty was goodness. So this is why Oscar Lilla be grateful to Allah. And Oscar is a command, right? That you must be grateful that no matter what happens, you still have to be grateful. You can never give up hope. You can never think negatively about Allah subhana data or score Lilla.
So I gave you some homework. Did you do it?
I'm very grateful that you did it.
Thank you very much that you did it. That hamdulillah because you see Quran is for Amel isn't it? It is for the purpose of implementation. This is what makes a person intelligent, right? put knowledge into practice. Because if we don't put it into practice, then what's going to happen? We're going to lose that knowledge, we're going to forget it. Correct. So I'm very grateful that you put it into practice. So Would anybody like to share
something from your gratitude exercise five things that you wrote down, that you're grateful for? I know, many things can be very private, personal. But if there's something that you think others could benefit from, please go ahead and share.
I'm grateful for my struggles and middle school, because they made me a lot stronger. And it's, I find it amazing that like they made me stronger. Because just yesterday someone was asking me, how do you deal with the pressure school? I was like, I don't deal with the pressure at school. I don't have any desire to partake in whatever goes on, you know. And it's only because of my struggles in middle school that I feel that way. Yeah.
You see, the sense of gratitude helps, like we learned earlier that it helps heal wounds from childhood even. Right? Because then you're not looking at the events that happened to things that happened in your life, in a sad way, you're not putting yourself you're grateful that had happened because you're focusing on the benefit that it brought you. Right, anything else somebody would like to share?
I want to come, I wrote I'm grateful for the ability for the heart to heal, even after being broken 1000 times in 1000 pieces, So alhamdulillah for healing and repair. Alhamdulillah indeed, imagine if hearts wouldn't heal.
Just imagine how miserable we would be how difficult lives we would be living. I just wanted to say Alhamdulillah from my mom who always reminds me to say Alhamdulillah because when I'm frustrated and I'm kind of just like complaining to her when she reminds me to say and hamdulillah even if I don't want to once I say I can't continue frustrated with being pressured and complaining and hamdulillah
somebody else?
Yes.
Unfortunately, I wasn't able to pray Fudger today's I was grateful for being able to wake up and you know, having the chance to repent and make up for the prayer that I miss
something that happened yesterday that you're grateful for.
Yes. When they go home there were students come at two o'clock. So whenever I come normally I just take a cup of tea and then come here, right? So my husband, he came very late and he texts me I didn't get the text. So Hamdulillah I prayed with you know with Gemma, I paid so her first I waited for him then I prayed with them and then I control myself I'm not gonna say anything I hungry like anything, right? But it's okay. I was not having any money in my wallet. And my friend was gone. So I control myself and when I went home, I was just to went home I would have one car stop then second car and third
And I just said to my daughter, give me a cup of tea, I'm going downstairs, I was asked to have the chain mess CURV
Al Hamdulillah. See, you focused on something you picked on something that you could be grateful for. Right? Amongst all the things that were going wrong, you found something to be grateful for. And that was that you got to pray in Jamar, right? And that Alhamdulillah helped you have Sabha. Right? Because otherwise what happens, you don't have to wait for the person to come, you can just yell at them over the phone, can't you just through a text message, you can really yell at them, you can, and then just let them come in front of you and call us. So sugar. Gratitude really helps you control yourself. It helps you focus your energies on what is really productive.
You know, you never take things seriously till you actually see somebody in a situation, or very close friend of mine, who was the most healthy person suddenly developed a disease where every organ of her body was gradually failing. And I would visit her from time to time and she was the most thankful person that I've seen. Like, she can't move her limbs, because something is not working properly. And still, she would say she could Alhamdulillah. And once I saw her not being able to breathe,
it was the most difficult thing to watch somebody who's healthy gradually deteriorate. And everybody around her, the whole family gets affected. And you will be so thankful when you see the person struggle. And she couldn't bring water by itself, she was thirsty. But if she drinks water, it would go into her lungs. So she had to add something to it to make it tick. And then bring it imagine if you're not able to drink water. I mean, I would see her every time with each difficulty. She was so grateful. And then I would take a lesson from that and say, you know, I took all these things for granted that I can drink water that I can read Alhamdulillah that today I can do it with ease. And I
wasn't even grateful for it till I actually saw this lady. So when we have these things, we don't realize it till we see somebody losing it and going through the struggles, says okay,
I'm grateful for my friends. If I didn't have my friends, I wouldn't have anybody to play with. Yes,
that is true.
You know, we think of money as a blessing and health as a blessing. And there are indeed blessings but friends
aren't the blessing. Really. We have many complaints about our friends sometimes. She didn't call me back. Right? She doesn't really remember me and unless she needs me, right, I care about her so much and she doesn't care about me. We do have complaints but the very fact that we actually have friends that is a huge blessing from Allah soprano.
So anyway, wash coral Allah be grateful to Allah. Now from the following verses, we will see the advice that Lachman the wise gave to his son.
But notice before the father's advice, as mentioned, what is mentioned first, the instruction that is given to the Father, right? Because many times we find that, you know, for example, in the Quran, it's mentioned repeatedly to be good towards your parents. I remember I was giving a Halacha, somewhere once and this one girl asked me that, what are the parents duties towards their children? You know, we talk a lot about what the children are supposed to do with their parents, what are the parents supposed to do with the children? What are their duties? What are their obligations, right? And this is really something that we do think about, we do wonder, and this is something for all
mothers and mothers to be in sha Allah, that don't just look at your children as people who are under you and those whom you're supposed to order around. You're supposed to instruct an order around. We as human beings as parents, Allah subhanaw taala has given us certain orders. So what is the command that was given to look man as a father? What is it that he's told Oscar Lilla. And really, if parents if this is what we focus on gratitude to Allah subhanaw taala for the very fact that we have children, and then find a reason to be grateful for having the children that you have with their problems and with their bad habits and what they're, you know, things that annoy you
whatever it may be, but still be grateful to Allah for even the faults that exist in your children. Because many times those faults, what do they show to us the faults that exist in us?
Many times it happens that parents they find it difficult to, you know, deal with their children because the entire focus is on what are the negatives
All right, the entire focus is on the negatives. She's not praying on time, she's not wearing her job the way I want her to, she's not studying this, she's not willing to get married, she's not doing this. She doesn't behave, she doesn't do this, find the faults are there. But just think about it. The positives are also there. There will definitely be things that you can be grateful for. In recently, this one lady, she came to me and as usual, many times when mothers come to me, they complain to me about their daughters, and like, you know, in your weekend class, tell the girls about this. I'm like, leave the girls alone. He know what they're studying, you need to study also,
seriously, give them a break? Don't say anything to them. Anyway, so this particular individual, she came to me and she's going on and on about her daughter, I'm like, Do you realize how lucky you are that you have a daughter who actually wears the hijab? You're complaining that she doesn't do this and this and this? Imagine if your daughter refused to wear the hijab? Why do you take her hijab for granted?
Why do you take her Salah for granted, don't do that. Appreciate that. And many times, this is what we want as human beings, that the way we are we are accepted. Right? I'm not saying that we are perfect, but at least the good we have acknowledged it.
I know that majority of the people sitting here are younger girls, but the mother is here and child they can benefit and inshallah mothers to be this is a very important command that Allah subhanaw taala has given to look, man, and this is for all parents, all parents are Shouko Lilla be grateful to Allah for the very fact that you have children, and for the children that you have with the faults that they have. Doesn't mean that they don't need to improve, they need to improve, but be grateful. And gratitude will change so many things. You know, when you show gratitude to somebody, for instance, doesn't it build trust and friendship, doesn't it? And that is key to good
relationships. If constantly at home, people are complaining about each other, then what's going to happen, nobody's happy. Nobody's relaxed. But if we start thanking each other for little little things, even not take it for granted, that makes the atmosphere very happy within the household.
Very true. gratitude brings the best out of people and criticism brings the worst out of them.
This is very true. Yesterday, it happened with me. I actually had to go somewhere. And my daughter at the last moment, she's like, I want to come with you. And she was so happy. It's way past her bedtime. But she wanted to come with him like short Inshallah, let's go. So I took her along with me. I'm giving the Halacha she's sitting very nicely, and she realizes that Mama has the iPad, right? And she wanted it. So I'm like, Okay, take it. But then she wanted to play zaqy You know, the video, lucky and unfill volume
while the Halacha is going on. Anyway, finally, you know, we survived the evening, I got home. And when I got home, I was a little upset. Because, you know, I felt like I couldn't really relax over there. But instead of getting upset with her, I said, I'm very, very grateful that you came with me. And I'm so thankful that even though it was way past your bedtime, but you came with me, you had your dinner, you sat with me. And I'm not alone. At nighttime, you're with me in the car. Thank you very much. So on and so forth. I was talking about all these positive things. You know, even though in my heart I was, you know, I forced myself to be grateful right emote and extend, right. So an
exercise. That's what I was doing. Basically, I get home and my husband asked my daughter, so how was it? And she goes, do thumbs up.
And I'm like, Yes, two thumbs up on vanilla. But I was thinking that if I had, you know, been yelling at her. If I had gotten upset with her, then what would that do?
What would that do? It would make her upset and she wouldn't want to come with me again. Right? And on top of that, you wouldn't like the idea that Mama has to go for. You know, Elektra here, elector there, she would like it. And what made it easier for me to accept it was to remind myself that she's only a child. Right. You know, hikma what is hikma? hikma is to be able to transform knowledge into action. And children lack that. You know, if I asked her about the rules, what are the rules that we discussed? She can list them all. No talking. No interrupting, no running. No this no that. I mean, she can repeat the rules are endless there.
Right. But this is the difference between an adult and a child. hikma is missing.
Right? So gratitude really it brings about the best
and people and criticism will bring about the worst of them. So we need to focus on the positive to grow that positive. What we appreciate appreciates, remember, let in Shackleton let us see the look of it will increase, it will grow.
And if we focus on the negatives, then it's the negatives that will increase. Doesn't it happen that somebody shows to you that they don't really trust you? And you're like, I'll show you them. You don't trust me? I'll show I'll prove it to you that I'm not worthy of trust. Doesn't it happen? That if somebody doesn't, you know, think positively about you than you'd like, fine? I'll show you. So this is something that's very normal within us human beings, whatever we focus on, that is what we increase in.
So now the advice of the Father to the Son
What if Paula, and when he said, who look man Oh, look, man.
And when look man said liberty, he to his son Wahiawa while he year elu, he was instructing him he was advising him.
Look man said to his son, while he was teaching his son while he was advising his son, notice the word yellow who it's from wild and wild is different from Tallinn 30 mins to give in, right to teach to educate, this is this, this is that so on and so forth. Right. But while is to advise in such a way that it actually affects the heart of the listener, it softens their heart, it moves their heart, it actually clicks with them, you know, it touches them, they understand it, they absorb it. So look, man, while he was talking to his son, he wasn't just telling him in a dry way in a very, you know, boring way. You know, we're supposed to do this and you're supposed to do this and you're
supposed to do this. No, he was talking to him in a very effective way in a way that his son understood in a way that his son you know, he absorbed what the Father was telling him so well who a year in lieu and here we really need to think about how is it that we talk to people is it just that we're focused on delivering the message you know, delivering the content and this is x this is why this is the end of it? Or is it that we want to make sure that the other person understands and grasps what is it that he said what was the advice? Yeah, when a year these were the words of look man yeah Boonah year learn to Shrek biller Oh my dear son, do not associate partners with Allah.
Yeah, buena. Yeah, yeah, Bonilla. Bonilla. What does it mean when he is actually a bunny? You know? Yeah, when he actually means yet even he Oh, my son, even even son, and yet at the end is for me. But notice how it's not evenly. What is it? Buena? Yerba
Buena? Yeah, this is basically the affectionate diminutive of Yeah, ebony. It's isn't this leaf the sweetest to make something small. All right. So when you make a word small, okay, why out of affection?
Out of affection. And it doesn't mean that it's small in the sense that it's small. You know, the word becomes small, but you make it cuter. You could say, okay, like, for example, a little girl has a blanket. She won't call it blanket. She'll say blankie
you understand? Why blankie and not blankets?
Why? blankie?
Why?
Okay, not just mine, but it's like,
you know, like, for example, doll. Doll. My Dolly.
You understand? Girl? girly? Kid, Kitty. Right? Why is that we change where it's like this. It's out of affection. It's out of love. So yeah, even ie not yet. Even he says yeah. When uh, yeah. Oh, my dear child. Oh, my little son. Oh, my beloved son.
You know, this style itself is so affectionate, so loving. Right? Now what we generally do is that when we call people, for example, our younger brothers and sisters or our own children, many times will use names that they're actually offended with. That they don't like.
Right? It's not done out of love. It's done out of, you know the intention to tease. But over here look, man is addressing his son in a very loving in a very affectionate way. Because this is so true that if someone talks to you in a loving way automatically you are pulled towards them. If so,
Somebody addresses you in a very affectionate way automatically you pay attention to them, you want to listen, you're drawn towards them. You know, love is something that attracts, it really pulls,
really pulls, you know, why is it that for example, if there's a child who cannot help, but look at the baby, seriously, there's so many people in a room, but why is it that your eyes are fixed on the baby? Right? And then why is it that you can't help but go and, you know, say something to the baby. Love attracts. So when you genuinely love someone you express that love verbally also, it will definitely pull them towards you. This is one of the best ways of advising someone. So yeah, Boonah here. Oh, my dear son, this is wisdom. Right. This is Hickman Yagoona, yet led to Shrek villa. The first lesson, this wise man this wise father gives his son is do not do shit with Allah. He doesn't
say I'm your father. You're the child. I'm the boss. You listen to me. Whatever I tell you. No, he's not establishing his superiority over his child. What is he doing? He's teaching his child Allah is your Lord and you worship Him and you worship only Him lead to Shrek Billa he is teaching his son the most essential knowledge. This is the most essential in after hate. Knowing that Allah is One Love the Shrek biller and love to shake meaning do not associate anything. What is chick chick is basically to give what is exclusively Allah's right to to somebody else. And all parents must teach their children about this led to Shrek Billa and then he gives him the reason in a Shilka indeed
ship Lululemon alim, it is surely an injustice, that is our leave that is great. It's a crime. It's an offense. It's injustice, that is great. How is it injustice? Because one is to not give someone what they deserve. Right? To put something in its improper place. This is what loom is Knox, whether a che fee lady Mahan Lee, there are so many definitions of Lauren, right. So Chinook is to give Allah's right to somebody else, that is unfairness that is putting something where it doesn't belong, learn is that you diminish someone's right. Allah's right is that he alone is worship when someone else is worshipped, besides Allah, that is reducing the right of Allah. So in the shitcan,
alumina alim, it's the greatest sin. It's a great sin. Now, what do we see over here? First of all, we see that look, man is teaching his son or pay the
right, he's teaching his son, then
the fact that he's teaching his son, what does it show that we must teach our children because our children are an investment?
They are and Amana, we are responsible over them. Some of you might think that, oh, I don't have children. So it's irrelevant to meet no think from now.
Because I'm sure you think about how you're going to dress your daughter when she's born. Right? I'm sure you think about how you're going to make her hair. I'm sure you think about what you're going to name your child. You know, even though you're not married, these are normal thoughts that we have. Right? So these are things that we must keep in mind also, that I am going to teach my children about their heat, I'm going to teach my children about Allah, I'm going to warn them against Schick and think about creative ways of teaching them, what chunk is what the hate is. So teaching our children suddenly we see teaching or clida first first lesson must be of though hate.
First lesson must be often hate. And this is something that should begin at a very early stage.
You know, for example, there's so many ways, you know, little babies, even five month old, six months old, you ask them, Allah is One, they point their finger when I remember my son was only about, I think, eight months or so. And my father He taught him, I mean Allah, where is Allah? And he would, you know, put his hand up like this up, up, you know, Mandla Buka or be Allah. Right? There'll be Allah. So these lessons of the hate you might think they don't even fully understand them. But still, do they understand ABCs seriously.
Do they understand Mary Had a Little Lamb? They don't. But just because they said over and over and over again, it just
stays in their brains. And this is what you want to do. But though hate in their heads, just stick it in. And for that you have to start very early. Many times we excuse ourselves saying that all the little child is not going to understand anything, just wait until, you know they go to school. They go to Islamic school, they go to the weekend school, you know, we can school, they'll call and they'll learn everything. But it might be too late. The other day, my sister was sad. So I was trying to distract her. So I started to acting like everything I was stepping on had feeling this bed, like let me not sit on it because it has feelings, right? It's gonna cry in this and that it's
probably hurting, right? And then I was like, Okay, let me get on something else. So then I jumped onto the mat. And then I was like, well, this mat probably has feelings too, and, and be sad and start crying. And then I stepped onto the floor. And I said the same thing. And I was like, Hey, wait a second, this floor is so strong, it holds everything. I think this floor created everything. Right? And then she was like, What are you talking about? Well, it was so bad. And then I was like, This is what some people do. You know, like, they say that they create something. And then they say that this created everything. And then she really understood it motion 100. And so in any way that
you can teach about check that they should understand should this is something that is our obligation. Another thing we see over here is that he's teaching his son about the Hayden chick. But he's teaching how lovingly right and this is something that we need to remember that address children with love regardless of their age. And regardless of what you're talking about.
Regardless of what you're talking about, whatever the topic is,
talk lovingly then another important thing we see over here is that he doesn't just say lotto shake Billa he gives them the reason
he gives them the reason that do not do shake because shake is the greatest sin.
And then of course that leads to a whole discussion and question and answers, discuss it. But give the reason. Don't just say because I said so. Now over here, there is a lesson for us also, which is that we must never do shake with Allah ever at any cost. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said do not associate anything with Allah. Even if you are cut to pieces, or burned.
Do not associate anything with Allah at any cost. In a hadith we learn anyone who dies worshipping others along with Allah will definitely enter the fire. This is when led to Shrek Villa Sheikh is described as learn injustice. The thing is that every sin is injustice, how, when a person is committing a sin, either he's committing injustice against himself, or he's committing injustice against someone else, or he's committing injustice against both himself and somebody else both combined. So shrink is the greatest sin, how that a person is committing injustice against himself. He's the servant of who Allah alone, and he's making himself the servant of somebody else. This is
unfairness. We weren't supposed to worship others. We were supposed to worship only Allah. And when we worship somebody other than Allah, we are harming ourselves. Who has given us the authority to do that. We're going beyond our limits.
How else is it an injustice because it's injustice against Allah, it's injustice against other people also, that if they follow us, if they do what we're doing, then what's going to happen? They're in error, they will suffer. So schicke is really the greatest sin in total and I 88 Allah mentioned so many prophets and then he says, well, oh, I should aku la habitacion Houma CAN WE ARE muddled. If they did check, whatever they did would have gone waste. Let's listen to the recitation.
We're all on Obama and he will
morning to shriek
machine shade color war room. Oh, now me