Al-Furqan 51-62 Word-Analysis and Tafsir 53-54
Taimiyyah Zubair – Taleem al-Quran 2010 – Juz 19 – L189C
AI: Summary ©
The concept of "immediate connection" is used for artwork and writing, and the use of salty water is seen as a way to avoid loss of identity. The importance of truth and falsehood is emphasized, and people are encouraged to be true to themselves and not give up on others' actions. The speakers stress the need to show appreciation for one's actions to avoid losing one's cool and avoid becoming annoying, and to focus on positive and negative aspects of one's behavior to avoid becoming annoying.
AI: Summary ©
Lesson number 189 sort of a con
well I levy and he is the one who meaning a last panel data Mirage Alva harini, who has released the two C's. How that has been forgotten, one is fresh and sweet will have them will judge and one is salty and bitter. But both of them there are flowing simultaneously. But what john avena who met and he has made between the two birds, the hunt a barrier, where hedgerow Madura and a prohibiting partition.
Well, who are the manager Bahraini manager is from the room fetters meme, gene.
And Mirage is to mix up it is to merge two or more things.
The word marriage from the same root is something that is confusing that you can't really understand for whom fee emblem marriage. Why? Because when two or more things are mixed up together, you cannot tell them apart.
Maharajah literally means to leave livestock animals for grazing, to release them to let them go so that they can graze so that they can pasture
that just imagine a herd of sheep, they have been released, the door has been opened up, the barn is open, and now they're off, they're going.
Now as they're going what happens, they keep mixing into one another, isn't it so they don't walk in straight lines. If you say okay, I'm going to follow this particular sheet, but I'm going to see where it goes, you're going to lose it unless if it's marked. Why?
Because it's going to be here at one point then it's going to mix into the other sheet but another point and then it's at the front and then it's on the side and then it's in the middle and then it's at the back they keep mixing into one another this is what managers literally do let loose to release something.
And in particular, Mirage is also used for mixing something because when something is let loose and what happens, what happens it gets merged, it gets mixed up. But it is to make something in a way that each thing, each part it retains its individual identity,
it retains its individual identity.
Meaning the things they have you can say integrated however they have not assimilated
you understand
they are together. But each and every component retains its individual identity they do not become one thing. Like for example if you have 50 beads, you put them together in a jar, you shake the jar to the beads become one big bead. No, they're mixed up. Right? But they're not assimilated in the sense that all of them become one thing or all of them become like each other.
You understand.
So what do I love the Mirage el Bharani What does it mean then that he is the one who has released the two seats freely so that both of them are flowing simultaneously.
Or secondly, monitor behind him that he has mixed them together he has joined them together. He has merged them together. Behind is the dual off and baja is used for a huge body of water. It can be applied to see it can be applied to an ocean It can also be applied to a huge River.
So module Bahraini he has joined the two bodies of water and Heather are the one forgotten this meaning huddled behind one of the two seas. It is a boon for autumn. One is on what does it mean is that which is sweet that which is pleasant. It's used for such water that is cool and pleasant and sweet that a person wishes to drink it even if there is no need.
When do you need to drink water
when you're thirsty or you've had spicy food, so then you need to have water
but it is such water it is such cool and pleasant and sweet water that you want to drink it even if you didn't have any spicy food even if you're not thirsty you just want to have it it's very very pleasant.
Understand
this is what it is and forgot forgot some newsletters fell out that for that is also is an alum of Euphrates River. However, over here for
means tasty sweet. Forgotten man is when water is extremely pleasant extremely delicious, extremely sweet.
But also such water that is great in quantity.
So I want for our time together What does it mean
for artists doing Tokido
so what does it mean? extremely delicious very, very sweet, very very pleasant. Just as when you have something that's very black What do you say jack black. When something is extremely cold What do you say ice cold. So you add more words in order to emphasize
so I won't fall out and fall out over here is emphasizing the sweetness the pleasantness
of this type of water
and for art over here also expresses the cathro the great quantity of the freshwater
so Heather, I've been forgotten. One is sweet, delicious. We're Heather Miller will judge and the other. It is milk. It assaulted male mainland hair. That which is salty, and has a lot of salt content, bitter in its taste. And a judge from the veterans Hamza Gigi
and EU judge is when something is extremely salty. And not just salty but also warm.
You understand? Not just salty, but also warm. Now think about this that you're having something that's very, very salty.
Imagine your sister made soup and you put a lot of salt in it. And on top of that it's also hot. When you have it what's going to happen
not only are you going to experience something very very bitter and salty in your mouth, but as you sip it, your throat and your chest even that will begin to burn
isn't it?
So this is what we judges when something is so salty. That when you swallow it your throat and your chest begin to burn.
This is why ajaya do is to burn to blaze.
So millhone adjudge together What does it mean? Salty, very salty, salty, and bitter. extremely unpleasant and also warm.
So if you look at it one is I've been for odd, cool, pleasant, delicious, sweet freshwater.
And the other melanogenic extremely bitter, extremely salty and warm.
If you think about it, river water. I was it. It's sweet, right? And it's also cool, isn't it?
But seawater, how is it salty and many times you will also find it warm. You'll also find it cold but many times you'll also find it warm.
So have them inherently judge. But these two different types of water what is Allah subhanaw taala say that he has Maharajah he has let them flow simultaneously both of them are flowing together
or that he has joined them together. However, even though they're joined up together, even though they're flowing simultaneously,
when john avena Houma Bursa he has made between them about what is the verse of a partition, a barrier and this barrier is invisible and it does not let them mix up together it does not let them lose their individual identity, it does not let them assimilate.
We're hedgerow Madura hedgerow macura we have also learned earlier what does it mean as an expression? What does it mean stop do not harm
and secondly, it is used for such a barrier that cannot be crossed a forbidding ban. So upper pivoting barrier that is not let the two waters mix.
If you think about it, if you take half a cup of salty water, half a cup of Sweetwater and you mix them together, what's gonna happen?
What's gonna happen,
they're gonna lose their identity. When you sip it, you won't find it salty, you won't find it sweet. It'll be something extremely strange and weird.
But we see that at such a large scale, whether it's a river joining the sea,
or there are two different types of water flowing in the sea, they do not mix with one another such that they lose their identity.
they retain their distinct colors. they retain their distinct colors I myself saw once do reverse joining together. One was of a darker green shade and the other was of a lighter green shade. And I was
amazed that both of them were flowing together until such a long distance, and they still had their own color, you could literally see a line between them.
So they retain their distinct colors. One is called the other is warm, and one is fresh, and sweet and the other is salty and bitter.
And we see that sometimes these two different types of water, sometimes they're flowing adjacent to one another. Sometimes they're flowing one on top of the other, and sometimes they're found as springs in the sea.
All of this what is the point to the great power of a loss of
intellect of Roman 19 to 20, we learn Mara galvanneal Tolkien bainer Huma boza han lineable Yan, that Allah has released the two C's that meet side by side, but between them as a barrier that neither of them transgressive.
insalata number is 61 we learn Amanda either out of the Koran with Gerardo Helena and held on with john and held Alessia with john Albania, Albania hedgies, a Isla humara Allah, but
is he not best, who made the earth a stable ground and placed within it rivers and made for it firmly set mountains and placed between the two seas a barrier? Is there any data with Allah, most of them do not know.
Now, when does this happen, when or where do these two different types of waters meet, but they do not lose their identity
with the Mediterranean Sea and the Atlantic Ocean, the two mixing together so panela that you see two C's, one is the see the other is an ocean, they're next to one another. However, the salt quantity in both of them. It's different, the saltiness, it's different. And as a result, when you swim in one, you swim better. And when you swim in the other, you swim worse and simulate the species that exist in one do not exist in the other.
So it has been proven scientifically that there are literally barriers between the sea and the ocean, the river and the sea, that prevent the two from assimilating that prevent the two from mixing together and losing their identity.
That although they are right next to one another, but still they retain their individual identity.
Now over here, the salty water and the sweet water, where is it that both of them meet, but still they do not lose their identity?
Many times First of all, it happens when a large freshwater lake or river enters a sea or an ocean which is salty. Now river, what kind of water does it have fresh and sweet Lake also fresh and sweet. But when it meets the sea, the sea has what kind of what salty.
But we see that as the river water enters into the salty water into the seawater, they don't just get mixed up into one another, no, they retain their individual identity both of them.
Similarly, in the sea, there are fresh water springs, fresh water springs, which is why you can actually find fresh water in the sea even what a huge blessing
but a huge blessing.
Then also that when the tidal waves when they begin to flow when they begin to ebb and flow, if you think about how the tidal waves form by the gravitational forces of the earth Sun and Moon according to some theories, but as the tidal waves are formed, what happens is salty water, it rises to the surface it comes to the surface and the sweet and fresh water it is at lower levels.
So, the fresh water is covered by the salty water one is overcome by the other. But still we see that as one is overcome by the other both of them they retain their individual identity
they do not lose themselves
they do not lose their identity.
Now if you look at it, why is this mentioned a
few related with the context of the soul. What is this little alpha con one that distinguishes between the two opposite things
that when you see freshwater and saltwater coexisting in the same body, in the same sea, perhaps in the same ocean even that as a sweet water enters into the salty water or you have freshwater springs in the salty water. You have one layer of Sweetwater which is covered by the salty water. Both of them, do not
mixed with one another. What does it show
that the believer even when he is upon the truth, even if he's surrounded by false, he will not assimilate, in a sense that he will not lose his faith. He will not lose himself lose his identity. No, he will remain who he is.
alasa panel tada has failed this world with opposites. Just as the way there is Sweetwater there is salty water similarity, there's truth and falsehood. There is good and bad. That has happened about the they're good people. They're bad people.
There is light there is darkness. Both of these opposites are found in dystonia.
And just as light and darkness, they do not mix with one another losing their identity. Similarly, the truth and falsehood what happens? The truth does not lose its identity. It maintains its identity.
If you think about it, when the sweet water is covered up by the salty water, does it say okay, I'm defeated and given up? Let me just mix with the salty water now. No, it does not mix. It remains what it is.
Similarly, even if the believers think that they are a minority, there are very few, they're very weak. And there is a surge of disbelief in opposing forces.
Should the believer give up? No. This is a very, very relevant example.
Especially to the people at the time the Prophet sallallahu Sallam there were so few in number. And constantly there was opposition from the enemy constantly. And it felt as though the videos are always covered up by the waves of salty water. But doesn't mean they should give up. Doesn't mean they should accept defeat and not remain who they are no Allah subhanaw taala says Jay hit home, Big Island Kabira keep struggling. Keep putting in effort he hasn't Kabila as required. And as you will do that you will remain who you are, you will not lose yourself, you will not lose your fate.
So what does it show to us? That in order to preserve your faith, in times of opposition? What do you need to do? Spread it conveyed to others. Because when you are struggling to convey the message to others, then your faith will become stronger. Believe me.
When you will struggle to convey the call on to others, your faith will become stronger. And if you think No, no, no, no, I cannot speak. There's too much tension. There's too much opposition. There's a surge of opposition, I cannot do anything. If you stop over there, then how long will you stay? jarhead whom big hadn't Kabira in times of opposition? Why? Because only then you will be able to retain your faith.
So what do we see over here, there is reassurance for the believers that even if you're few, even if you're weak, realize that you are up on the hook you are upon the truth.
And just because the enemy is too much is great in number. It doesn't mean you lose yourself. Just remember, this is a temporary phase. When the waves they begin to ebb and flow and they form at that time there's a lot of tension, but eventually what happens?
The sea comes down,
isn't it? Similarly, right now, there's a lot of opposition, you keep struggling and what will happen. Eventually, things will become long.
If you look at it, what is needed quality, the sweet water, when it retains its quality, it retains what it is that it will remain it will last.
But if the emphasis is not on the quality, but only on the quantity, then what's going to happen.
You will not be able to remain who you are.
And there is another very important lesson that Allah subhanaw taala has created different different things, right? You have the salty water, you have the sweet water,
but both of them remain who they are,
isn't it?
They're in the same sea in the same ocean. They're living right next to one another but they remain who they're now human beings also what are they made of?
Water? What does it show to us that people they're of different nature. A person might be very sweet in his nature and other person may be very salty, very bitter in his nature.
But just because someone is very salty and bitter in their nature, should you give it to them? No. Should you not live with them? No. If Allah has written in your decree that he
You are going to be with the salty water.
He wasn't going to be surrounded with the salty waters doesn't mean you lose your sweetness.
Should you lose your sweetness? Just because you're surrounded by bitter water? No. Should you say I cannot survive here anymore? No, you could have been in the form of, you know, ice or like a glacier at the top of a mountain, far away from salty, bitter water was possible. But Allah put you amongst salty water.
That's meant for you that's written for you accept it.
And once you're there, it doesn't mean you lose yourself. It doesn't mean you lose your sweetness, because many times what happens we keep blaming other people. She's so harsh, she's so rude. She's so annoying. Therefore, I'm very short tempered.
Therefore, I say bad words. Therefore, I'm always arguing therefore I cannot be patient anymore. No, if sweet and salty water can coexist. Similarly, you can also coexist with other people who are often very, very different nature than you.
It's about how strong you are.
It's about how you realize the limits that Allah subhana wa
berzon, Hydra Madura there is a barrier which you cannot cross a barrier of respect, no matter how bitter the other person is, or how salty he is. You're not supposed to go against the commands that Allah Subhana
Allah has set the limits, and you cannot cross them,
you understand.
So this is also a very, very important lesson that we learn. Because in life, you will come across many people. It's possible many of you are living in your own houses with your own parents, and everybody's very, very sweet. Perhaps you're the youngest one, perhaps you are the eldest one, everybody's very sweet to you. But the moment you come out of your family and you come across other people, they may be very salty and bitter towards you. You don't lose your sweetness because
you accept this is the decree of Allah, you remain who you are and realize the limits that Allah has said
many times we deal with other people thinking about how they are,
isn't it?
Because she is so annoying, therefore, I yell
because she does not do this. Therefore I do not get along with her, what should we remember the other is the way he is. But at the same time Allah has placed above
Allah has placed a hedgerow Matura that I cannot disrespect the other person. I cannot yell at them. I cannot argue with them. I cannot fight with them, regardless of how bitter How annoying they're.
So this is a very important rule that we must remember in life.
And if you remember it, if you apply it, believe me, you can live with anyone.
You can live with anyone you can deal with anyone. And you see when you're doing our This is a very, very major hurdle.
You want to talk to someone, they're so annoying. They don't listen, they argue with you, should you give up? Should you lose your temper? Should you lose your sweetness and begin to yell at them? No, remember the limited a lesson
that we learned about the disbelievers that What did they say in Kerala you live Luna, an early Latina Lola on savarna he was about to deviate us away from our gods had we not been patient.
So if they are so patient on their false hood, if they are so firm on their false ways, what is our obligation
what is our obligation, we remain firm on the right ways on the ways that Allah has given to us.
So we need to be sweet within ourselves be confident Allah and we do as our teamwork some of them we are sweet and we are bitter. So for this thing for this jihad, we have to Jihad within ourselves and then outwardly when we learn many Taka Allahu Hawa when people are outside, falling the desire badly Allah subhanaw taala gave us command in the contrast for la petite can
be so when there are fighting, they're struggling working hard for something completely wrong. We have Jad and we are not supposed to follow them, because unfortunately, we ourselves are very weak within us. We are several shameful of many things being a mother many times I know nowadays nicer long. When you wake up your kids from early morning some of them say it's okay. So being a mother when we are preparing a future generation, what we are doing, what kind of jihad we are doing on ourselves and what we are teaching to our kids
We should definitely learn a lesson from missionaries, certain missionaries certain * with there's so admin, I remember doesn't when she was telling us a situation of where she had met someone. And she said, they said they work six months. And then six months, they devote, specifically they volunteer and like their special like Institute's for the work of their team.
And, you know, when it comes to Jihad and Kabira, they really do have an appeal, that sometimes you can discuss something with them, and you can debate with them, you can argue with them for two, three hours, they will not give up until you are satisfied.
They will never get upset and angry and just walk away. They'll ever do that. No matter how much you try to annoy them or how much you try to, you know, make them realize they're wrong. They don't lose their patience.
they retain their sweetness matter how bitter you become towards, you will notice that
I remember once these two missionary boys, they came over to my sister's house, I happened to be there. And my sister and I first were talking to them, and they're standing outside the door. Because they said that wherever there are only women were not allowed to go, there must be at least one man only then we can come in. That was very interesting. But anyway, they were standing outside in the heat of the sun. And first me and my sister were talking to them spoke them for a very long time and my sister gave up she went, somebody else came, then we're talking to them. I gave up my sister came like we took turns literally. And they're standing there for two hours. Plus, they
didn't get upset or angry or think oh, it's past our time and we need to go it's almost sunset. No. They wanted to make sure we understood all of our questions were answered. This is what they wanted. And there were many times where easily they could get annoyed by the questions that we were asking them. But they didn't show any frustration, any anger, nothing. But what happens with us, we become so angry, and we think we're getting angry for the sake of a line, we start yelling at the other person, and we want to start beating them up. And we tell them to go away and never show up again. We become so angry. Can you do to have them computer like that?
No, you cannot lose your sweetness just because the other is bitter.
They completely blind faith. They believe with so much conviction what they're doing, which is why they're able to do what they do. And I think at the end of the day, if you look at us, there's something lacking, we don't fully believe because if we believed as much as they believed, then we would have if not more conviction than they
need to we need to check within ourselves do we really truly believe like, deep down? If you look at them, you can dissuade them. They it's like ingrained in them.
First of all, the belief it's just like selling a $2,000 vacuum, right? If you don't believe in your product, you'll never be able to sell that because it's first of all, it's $2,000. And this is the training upon the salespeople that you have to must believe in your product in order to sell it. Second why they keep calling you. Yeah, they keep telling you the benefits. They keep sending you flyers, right. Second of all, doing dour and patience. I just experienced this not very long ago at about two weeks ago. Every time we get on the bus because we're both wearing niqab like this bus driver is like wearing her frown. So anyways, I would say like, you know, good morning, how are you?
And she would just give us the transfer and all that stuff. Thanks. Goodbye, like and every time we get on the bus, I'm smiling and I'm always asking her house her day and I was like, This morning, and hamdulillah she's actually telling her her weekend to me. And like you know how it's too hard for her to get up in the morning. And this morning Alhamdulillah like, you know, I was just taking my my time. And I gave her a book like this. And she was actually telling me about cottaging on the weekend. And it's like I said, Here, read this when you go to your cottage. And this is the book that I always always used for Dawa and hamdulillah this mentioned
a brief illustration Guide to Understanding Islam. The things that we are discussing in the Quran all of them are in here in this meeting. Right like the the mention of the two seas the embryology the positive and the negative charges of the lightning and the amazing book and I was like I didn't wanna let go that chance because like, oh my god this morning, she's smiling and she's talking and she's talking about her cottage.
Like what do you need? Some if you think or maybe she doesn't like Muslims Forget about it. I'm not gonna say hi to her. I'm not gonna say good morning to her and you just walk by her. Saying that Oh, if you can show me anger, I can show you anger too. Then can you convey you cannot convey
you have to retain your sweetness no matter how bitter the others
Sonico just to add, a sister was saying that like, if you believe in your product, you will sell it. And I remember there was this, I think he is from Sierra. And then he went to Mexico, and then to spread Islam, and like he's in the living in rural area, and then he's teaching native. And in Savannah like they were saying that the native are becoming like Muslim. And I was just thinking that this is just only one person. And he realized that his responsibility went there to convey the message. But the thing is, like he had the belief and then he had conviction, the conviction.
That's the recitation of these verses
Hola, Camila, Eva Sharon.
And it is he who has created from water a human being
who does Basha refer to
it can refer to Adam or listener. And it can also refer to human beings in general because we're who are letting holler come in and may.
And what does water refer to? It can refer to.
And it can also refer to that, as we learned earlier, which are unlimited may equal the shape and height that every living creature has been made from what water so what do I love the hollow Camila, Eva Shaolin. In the previous ayah, what did we learn the two types of water, one is salty, one is bitter.
So just as there are two types of water Similarly, there are two types of people some are very nice, some are very sweet, very accommodating, and other people may be otherwise
flagella who then he made for him. Meaning that Allah has made the human being NASA been kindled by blood was the one and also Kindred by marriage. Work on aboukir cadila and your Lord is April.
For Jeremiah hoonah. Seven, what does that mean? nessa are those relationships that are by blood, when you're related to someone because of blood.
Because you share the same lineage, you are of the same descent.
And Sahara. On the other hand, side Hara are those relationships that come about you to marriage.
So for example, when a man marries a woman, he gets a new relative how he gets a wife, whom he did not have before. And it's not just that he gets a wife, but through her, he gets an entire family, isn't it? So he gets another set of parents, he gets another set of siblings, he gets another set of relatives.
Similarly, for a woman when she gets married to a man, what happens? She gets another family, another set of parents another set of siblings. So for Jada who know seven, was
it has also been said that NASA often refers to sons. Why? Because it is through sons that the NASA continues, isn't it?
It is through the son and not the daughter that the lineage continues.
Isn't it?
Like, for example, the man, his children? Which last name, do they get their mother's name or the father's name?
Father's name, right. So NASA refers to sons and so on the other hand, refers to daughters. Why?
Because it is through daughters that you get in law, relationships.
And the daughter, what happens to her when she goes into somebody else's family? She does not continue with your name, but rather her children what name will they get? their father's name?
So for Jonah, who nessa one will say, what cannot buka cadila and your Lord is ever able.
What does it mean by this, that if Allah wills, He could have created every human being, just like other medicine.
That other restaurant Allah subhanaw taala created him himself, he did not have any parents,
isn't it? He did not have any siblings. Similarly, every human being could also have been made like that, without parents without siblings without relatives.
Bye but Allah subhanaw taala has made human being such that they are related to one another, by blood and also by marriage.
Because when people are related to one another what happens? When relationships are established what happens? increases love, it increases the sense of responsibility. You care for other people, you're more concerned about them. Naturally you are.
If you look at it, other creatures such as stars, for example, they don't have any relationship between them.
Similarly, if you look at even goats, even lions, although they are related by blood, but they don't have that sense of love, and the feeling of relationship between them as much as human beings.
So human beings, this is a huge favor of a lot upon us, that he has created us, such that we have families, such that we have relatives by blood, and also by marriage.
And when a person is born into a family, then what happens, he has so many people to love him, so many people to care for him. He has his parents, he has his uncles and aunts and older siblings and grandparents. Just imagine if a child did not have any relatives. You know, some children as they grow up, they know their grandparents, as they grew up, they tell stories about their grandparents. And if you did not know your grandparents, if they passed away before you were born, or you were very, very young, how would you feel you missed out on something, isn't it.
Or, for example, if you live very far away from your grandparents, and you only got to see them once or twice, you don't really know them that well, and your parents tell you about them, you do have this love for them, but you wish that you got to spend more time with them. Right? It's only natural.
So when a child is born into a family, he gets the love and care of so many people, so many people. And this is what makes human beings human. This is what makes us different from other creatures.
This is what makes us caring and concerned. And this is what makes us realize our duties, our obligations towards other people the rights that other people have over us.
And when a person gets married, then he gets another family, she gets another family.
And if you look at it, all the people this way, they're connected to one another in some way or the other, either by blood, or by marriage, through close relationship or through distant relationship.
So when they're related to one another, if you find out that somebody is your distant cousin, your distant relative, even if you've never met them before, what happens when you meet them, there's a different kind of a feeling,
isn't it. So
even if you meet your relatives after many, many years, it's a different feeling compared to meeting a person whom you went to school with in grade two, and you're meeting them after 20 years, doesn't bring the same feeling as you meet your cousin,
isn't it.
So this feeling this love of Allah subhanaw taala has put into our heart so that we become human, we become different creatures, we become caring creatures. And this is a means of bringing happiness into the world. This is a means of bringing happiness and comfort to the people that they become a source of support for one another.
And the details of NASA and we have learned about them earlier insert and decide which people are related to a person by blood. Like for example, in sort of the NASA I have 2223 Halima arlequin, that these women are forbidden upon you What is it show that they are your relatives in the news also we learned about which people a woman is allowed to show her Xena to which shows that there are her relatives, either by blood or by marriage. But there's another type of relationship which is through rodar.
And in Buhari we learned that Yahoo may not or it may have been an sob. What is unlawful because of blood relations is also unlawful because of the foster relations.
Now, we see over here that both the relationships by blood and also by marriage, they're necessary.
Or they think about it, are they necessary? Yes, they are.
Like for example, for a child to be born. He needs both a mother and a father,
isn't it? for a woman to have a child what does she need husband.
These relationships are necessary, those relationships that Allah has created,
just as the salty water serves a particular purpose. Similarly, the Sweetwater also serves a particular purpose, isn't it'll.
Similarly, it's possible that there are some relationships there are some relatives and you don't like that much, whom you don't get along with as well.
But remember that they are also necessary.
There are alternatives to say.
Like, for example, if a woman thinks that forget about a, why do I need my in laws, I don't need to live with them, I don't need to be living close to them, I don't need to see them every now and then I can raise my child and my own. But one is that you raise your child exclusively. You're the only one who shows love to the child. And the other is that a child has been shown love by his aunts and uncles and grandparents. It's very, very different. Isn't it all? Children who are raised by only their parents, what happens? Many times they have fears, fears of who the outer world because whatever fears the parents have, they transfer them into the children, isn't it? But as a child is
exposed to so many people, he learns how to trust different different people.
He sees that, yes, my aunt can scold me at one point. But she can also give me a very lovely gift at another point,
isn't it
that when a child is raised by multiple people, when a child is shown love by different people, then what happens? It feels different different needs in the child.
Because remember that you as a mother, as an individual cannot provide all the love to your child, you cannot do that. He needs more than that. And for that Allah subhanaw taala has made all of these relatives, all of these relationships. So both are necessary.
Now, many times what happens people find their relatives through NASA very sweet. And usually people find relatives through Sahara, very salty. But just because one is salty, just because when there's not as nice doesn't mean you cut off from them. No, as I mentioned to you earlier, that the two offers Allah has put them together. The Sweetwater could be in the form of a glacier at the top of a mountain far away from salty water. But it was written and it's stuck the it has to be amongst the salty water.
So if it's in your ducted, if it's in your decree accepted, and just because others are bitter, doesn't mean you lose your sweetness. This is something that we have to apply in family life. This is something that we have to apply when doing Dawa. This is something that we have to apply when working with other people. There's something very, very important. Just because the others are not the way you want them to be. Doesn't mean you cut off from them.
It doesn't mean you become harsh with them. No, you remain who you are.
Because both are necessary. Both types of behaviors, they achieve certain things like for example, if a person is extremely strict, you might not like their strictness. But if there were not strict, then what would happen, the work would not be done.
It's possible that a person is very lenient, very gentle, you don't like their leniency, you want them to be more tough. But if they were not that lenient, then what would happen? People would not come and do the work.
So yes, we do not like certain people, we do not like certain behaviors, because they might be annoying.
They might be bitter.
But realize that each is necessary at its own pace. Each is playing a different role. You might not like how your grandmother is, you know, you might not like how your mother in law is. But in some way or the other, there is good in some way or the other there is some benefit, always focus on the positive. Always, what is our behavior, that when it comes to these relatives, we are only complaining all the time.
We don't look at the positive aspect.
Remember everything, there's both positives, as well as negatives. focus on the positive, and the negative will reduce in your sight.
It's possible, you know, like your mother in law telling you to, let's say wash dishes. You keep thinking oh my god, she treats me like a servant there. She cooks and she tells me to wash dishes. But it's possible that the way you wash dishes every single day, you become so fast, you become so quick at it, that after a few years, it's not such a big deal for you anymore.
If you hadn't received all that practice, you would not become as good.
There was this book that I was reading in which they were mentioning that in order to become good at anything, you have to spend at least 1000 hours,
at least 1000 hours there's 1000 hour rule. You don't like mopping the floor you feel as if you're being treated like a servant. But think about it, the more time you spend doing it. The better you become at it,
the more quick you will become.
So, yes, people are nice people are better. You get along with them. You don't get along with them.
There are some things you like about them. There's something
You don't like about them?
But ultimately, what should we remember that these relationships? What are they a blessing of Allah?
They are a huge blessing of Allah. And instead of complaining, what should we be doing, focusing on the positives? What cannot buka do And your Lord is ever able he could have put you in some other situation.
He could have created some other circumstances for you. There are many people who never see their end loss, isn't it so? But Allah has put you in a position where you live with your own life. Because
at the end of the day, it's not your will. It's the will of Allah. He executes whatever he desires.