Indeed I am Near – Day 9 – Prayers for one’s Parents
Channel: Taimiyyah Zubair
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AsSalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh
are the bIllahi min ash shaytani R rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah al Karim. Officially Saudi were Siddeley MD Wagner Okta melissani of Kahu. Kohli Allahumma the copy was sent deadly Sani was loads of humor to Colby meanie herbal al Amin
what either sir like everybody or knee for anybody, og Buddha or whatever they're either Dan fell yesterday bully while you may know be La La homier should own. And when My servants ask you concerning me, indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon me. So let them respond to Me by obedience, and believe in me, that they may be rightly guided
of the things that we should be asking Allah subhanaw taala for the drawers that we should be making, is that May Allah bestow mercy on our parents. Our drawers should include drawers for our parents. Allah subhanaw taala tells us in the Quran, that what kadaga or Buka alerta or goo Illa a year, and your Lord has decreed that you not worship except him. What Bill Wiley they near Santa and to parents good treatment. So after the right of Allah, the right of His Messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Remember, the people who deserve the most from us are our parents. Because here in this ayah Allah subhanaw taala gives us a final decree of his work although rabuka Tada is final
judgment, a decree a ruling, meaning this is not something that we have a choice about. So your Lord has ruled, he has decreed that first of all, you should not worship anyone except him. And secondly, what will Wiley thy near Santa and to parents good treatment? In my blue Honda in DeKalb, Kibera huduma Oklahoma, fell out taco Lahoma often Walton Houma whether one or both of them reach old age while with you, say not to them as much as off and do not repel them. What call Lahoma colon Karema but speak to them a noble word, Whitefield love imaginer had do liminal Rama and lower to them the wing of humility, out of Mercy will call and say or Bill him home, Homer, my Lord, have mercy upon
them come out of banni Selita as they brought me up when I was small. Allah subhanaw taala gives us his final decree over here. What is it that Allah has ruled that we must not worship anyone but him, that our heart, our tongue, our body, our entire being, every action that we do, everything should be dedicated, for the sake of Allah subhanho wa taala. Our worship, our sacrifice our prostrations entire life should be in obedience to Allah should be dedicated to Allah azza wa jal. And then we see that along with the hate, we see the command to be good to one's parents is mentioned over here. And this shows us the sanctity of of being good to one's parents, how how sacred of an act, this is
that this is a a religious deed because Allah subhanaw taala has obligated it. And then we see that this is not an ordinary, you know, good deed, no, this is an obligation, just as it is an obligation on us to worship Allah. Likewise, it is an obligation on us, that we are good to our parents, because both are mentioned in the same idea that worship only Allah, and then be good to your parents. So when both commands are given in the same sentence in the same verse, that it means that both are important. And remember that your son with one's parents, is to treat them in an excellent way. Not only with your words with your good kind words, but also with your beautiful actions, your
actions, your acts of service to them, and every such word or deed that brings your parents something of benefit or
or some kind of joy or happiness than this is a form of your son. And your son includes both things that on the one hand, you treat them in a good way. And on the other hand, you protect them from your harm also, that where you try your best to be kind to your parents to serve them, to bring them joy to make them happy. At the same time, you must do your best to protect them from from your harm, that you do not accidentally, or, or even deliberately hurt them, or do something to annoy them, do something to upset them. Any Air sign includes both of these matters. In New Jersey explains that air sign with parents is to obey them in what they come in, as long as it is not something forbidden
or wrong. It is to give preference to their command over voluntary deeds. Meaning on the one hand, your if your parents have asked you to do something, and you wish to do something, that is a good thing, but it's a voluntary act of worship, then you have to give preference to the Command of your parents, to the wish of your parents over your wish your son with parents is to stop from what the parents forbid, from your son to parents is to spend on them, spend from your earned money, the money that you have earned yourself, or the money that you have acquired lawfully, in whatever way the money that is yours, you should spend from that on your parents, your Santa parents is that you
fulfill their wishes. It is that you strive hard in order to serve them, with your hands with your feet, that you go run their errands, you go do their dishes, you prepare food for them, you serve them, you physically work in order to make their life easy for them. Your sign with parents is that you you are respectful towards them, that you show proper adult, you are not rude or harsh, you do not treat them as the way that you treat a friend or someone who is lesser than you someone who is let's say a child, someone who's younger than you or someone who is foolish doesn't understand much No, your son to parents is that you are respectful towards them, you show proper good other, it is
to have haber in ones hard for them, meaning have some fear in the sense that you treat them with utmost respect. And out of that, you do not raise your voice at them. And you do not look at them with your eyes fully open meaning do not give them the look the way you do to you know to your child or something like that, when they say something upsetting when they do something upsetting. So, you you give them the look, you open your eyes and you stare you cannot do that with your parents that is contrary to your son, your sign to parents is that you do not address them by their name. Rather you address them by a by a you know fitting expression or or title or word that is used in your
culture. So for example, use the word mother or father or dad or something like that do not address them by their name that is contrary to your son. In law, Josie even says that part of ESSA is that you walk behind them, not in front of them as if you are leading them. And they have to follow you they have to catch up with you know, you walk behind them, show them other and part of your son in New Jersey says is to be patient over anything that they do which you dislike. Because sometimes because parents are human, they will make mistakes. And sometimes their preferences are different. Their upbringing, maybe very different their you know, the part of the world they grew up in the
culture that they're accustomed to that, you know, according to that they may say something or do something that you might find strange, or you may even dislike, but at that time, be patient because parents are not deliberately trying to annoy you or harm you or hurt you. It's just what they are accustomed to what they're used to. So be patient over that. And do not be disrespectful or rude to them. And the other thing is that parents are humans, and sometimes when they're tired, when they're, you know, upset over something or they're stressed out about something and because they feel very safe and comfortable around you. Then they're able to you know express themselves
completely and fully and sometimes that comes across as as rude to us. We feel like they are being
rude to us, they are being harsh to us. No, bear that with patience. Do not be disrespectful towards them. Do not be rude towards them. Allah subhanaw taala says and this idea that in my yeah blue Honda in the cult Cuba, that if they reach old age with you, with you, meaning before you used to be with your parents and you were in need of them, and now they are with you, because of old age, and because of weakness, and they are in need of you, they took care of you. And now they are in need of being taken care off. So if that happens in your life, that you see your parents old, in their old age, then fella taco Lahoma off, then do not even say off to them off is an expression of is any
expression of speech that is harsh, disliked, or it is bad. And originally, the word of is something that is detestable or dirty. So off is the dirt of nails, the dirt that is under the nails that is off. So off is used to show disgust. It's an expression that is used to show disgust or dislike or contempt. And at times off is used to show annoyance and frustration. So Allah subhanaw taala tells us fella taco Lahoma off, do not even say off to them. Meaning Yes, there will be times when you may when you will feel annoyed, or you will feel frustrated that you have been working so hard to do things the way they like, and yet they find a reason to criticize, or that their needs never end or
that you cannot have time to yourself, or that you always have to attend to them. You You know it's one thing after the other or you have to you know not answer back. And then you know, you feel frustrated you feel annoyed. But Allah subhanaw taala tells us let the code Lahoma of do not show that frustration, do not show that annoyance. Do not even say it with the two letter word.
And think about it, if off is not allowed than what is more than that is not allowed at all. How can it be acceptable that a person begins to yell at their parents raise their voice and talk to them as if they're talking to, you know, a criminal? Someone who is completely ignorant? How how can someone do this?
We see over here Allah subhanaw taala tells us well at and her humor and do not scold them, do not do not rebuke them. And this shows us the status of parents that children are not allowed to, to tell off their parents. Children are not allowed to speak to their parents harshly. They're not allowed to rebuke them ever. Even if parents are doing something that the children dislike that the children get annoyed with, that the children do not want them to do still, as children, we are not allowed to ever raise our voice or rebuke our parents. And then remember that off is the annoyance that when fields in the heart and expresses it in a very small way, right because it's just off any
a person is not saying much and a lot of times because a person is not saying much is not answering back right then something very small like the word of comes out. Allah subhanaw taala is forbidding us from using the word of even and not is to rebuke to scold to tell off that one is losing it basically. So we are being taught over here that neither show little frustration nor a lot. Do not say small words, you know out of being passive aggressive, nor be openly aggressive, or lose it with your parents. Instead, do your son with your parents that if they reach old age with you, then do not express verbal frustration and do not show any disrespect to them through the smallest of words
even we'll call Lahoma colon Karima and say to them noble words. Om Karima is basically speech that is soft, gentle, respectful.
Oh, and modest even meaning it shows that a person has high up.
So they're speaking very carefully. They are selecting their words with care and attention. They're not speaking freely and carelessly. This is colon Karima. So Mujahid explains that do not address your parents by their name or cornea. Rather address them by saying something like yeah, ABA T. Oh, my dear father,
and colon Kadima. somewhat random, I say that this is that just as your parents did not feel or show any disgust in cleaning you when you were little. Rather, they would treat you very lovingly. You should also treat them the same way without showing any disgust. And only lovingly and you think about it. When a mother or father is changing their baby's diaper in the middle of the night. They're not going to yell at the child at the baby that did you really have to dirty your diaper at this time? Do you not understand what time of night it is? Do you not realize how tired I am? Why do you have to dirty so many diapers? Do you understand how expensive they are?
Parents don't say such things to their babies to their children. Yet, when children have to take care of their elderly parents, they begin to get annoyed over every little thing. And they remind their parents of you know the favors that they're doing. And they're constantly you know, showing frustration and disgust Subhanallah we are taught over here that Kula Houma, colon Kadima, that, whatever you do for them, do it lovingly, and use speech that is very respectful, do not let them feel that they are a burden on you, that you have done so much for them, and that you are so tired looking after them. And that it's becoming very expensive, taking care of them. Don't do that. Then
we are taught what field love imagine now hello, liminal, Rama and lower, for them the wing of humility out of mercy. Now, this has been interpreted in two ways, somewhere, and I must say that this means that you should guard and protect your parents, you should look after them, just as birds look after their young. You see, when when birds are looking after their babies, they're young. What do they do? They, they spread out their wings, and they don't just spread out their wings and lift them. No, they lower their wings on to their young in order to cover them fully. You know, there are videos that will show for example, an eagle is sitting in its nest, and it's completely covered in
snow, completely covered in snow. And then it gets up and you know, shakes off all of the snow. And then you can see the eggs and the chicks in the nest that the bird was protecting, guarding. Think about it, you need this is what parents do for their children, that they will bear cold, and they will bear physical hardship and pain and danger even why in order to provide comfort and ease and safety to their children. Allah subhanaw taala is advising us that we should treat our parents the same way that we should protect them, we should guard them, we should defend them, we should look out for their well being and their safety. We should be protective of our parents. How often is
that? You know, sometimes
that, you know, friends will will make fun of their friend's parents. And a lot of people don't have the courage over there to defend their parents. They will in fact, you know,
you know get carried along and they will make fun of their parents with their friends. So this is the exact opposite. We are being taught over here that we should protect and guard our parents look after them. Another interpretation of this is that Be humble before your parents be humble before your parents. And this is because when a bird flies and rises high, it spreads its wings. But when the bird needs to descend, it needs to come down it lowers its wings. So lowering one's wings before one's parents means that a person shows humility before them Subhanallah and some are LM I say that in this is an indication that the more humble you are before your parents, the more Allah will raise
you in the heavens. Because Jenna has don't use your wings of humility. Lower yourself before your parents and Allah subhanaw taala will take you high. Allah subhanaw taala will give you some
Access and good mentioned and status, but it begins with how you treat your parents. And then we are taught will call up in Houma come out of Bayani silly law and say, oh my lord have mercy on them. Just as they raised me when I was little, when I was young, we are taught to make dua for our parents. And this shows us that we can never ever return the favor that our parents have done to us. We can never reciprocate. And no matter how hard we try, we will still fall short. Because we cannot do for them what they did for us SubhanAllah. And even when we are in a situation where we have to help our parents look after them, provide them personal care, and things like that. Our feelings are
not the feelings that our parents had when they were looking after us. So then we can only make dua, we can only ask Allah subhanaw taala to give our parents what they deserve, and to take care of our parents and be and be be merciful towards them.
Now we'll call rabbit hum Homer come out of Bayani Sileo. We're asking Allah subhanaw taala that he should bestow his mercy on our parents and remember that Rama includes all good things with respect to Deen dunya. And
then when you're asking Allah to show mercy to your parents, this means that you're asking Allah to bless them in their Deen to forgive them to to accept their good deeds, to give them good rewards. You're asking Allah to bestow his mercy on your parents, that you're Allah grant them good health, this includes good health. This includes well being any ease in life. Also Rahama includes benefits of the akhira that he or Allah, you forgive them, you admit them into paradise, you raise their ranks, so we'll cover a bit ham Houma, praying for mercy for your parents is the best thing that you can do. Because this is very comprehensive. And come out of Bayani Selena, we're especially taught
to say that in your da say, that have mercy on them, just as they raised me when I was little, meaning just as they showed me mercy by raising me, you show me you show mercy to them in the same way and come out of Bayani also means because that because they raised me because they are looked after me. I am not able to reciprocate. So yeah, Allah, you show mercy to them, you reward them, you make up for what I fall short in.
And here we are reminded of our infancy, our childhood, our weakness, our complete dependency on our parents, when we were in need of protection, we were in need of care. We were in need of love. And our parents provided that to us. And you see, parenting is something very hard. Sometimes in your life, you see your parents struggle with your younger siblings, maybe. So don't just watch them struggle. Don't just have pity made doll for your parents, that you're up, have mercy on them, you're up, make it easy for them. Sometimes you see your parents struggling with some illness or their work, right health issues. So don't just, you know, feel pity. All right, don't just feel this
regret in your heart, that you know I was not able to do such and such for my parents, I am not able to do such and such for my parents. Rather, you know channelize that energy into making Dora ask Allah to bestow mercy on them. Because when Allah subhanaw taala will envelop them with his mercy, then all of their affairs will become easy. All of their matters will become easy. This doesn't mean that you don't do anything yourself that you just may draw for them. No, in this aisle, we are taught both things that do good to your parents, and then also make dua for them. Both are necessary. We see that the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, they would make
dua for their parents. We learn that at one occasion a Buddha Ana de la Horne who went to his homeland in in an archaic sorry, he went to his land in a cape.
And when he entered it, he raised his voice, and because his mother was far, and he said from the entrance, a Salam or aleikum wa rahmatullah who about a cattle who yet Omaha, peace be upon you, mother and the mercy of Allah and His blessing be upon you. Oh, mother. So she replied to him. Why Lekha salaam wa
Hola Hola. Barakatuh and Peace be upon you and the mercy of Allah and His blessing. And then I will go read of the Longhorn who, before even he reached her as he's walking toward her. Right. He said Rahim Akela he come out of beta and Isa Lyra. Sorry, Rahim Akela who come out of beta teeny Saliba, that may Allah have mercy on you, as you raised me when I was a child? And she replied, yeah, Guna Yeah, oh, my son, were under and you to Fajr Zach Allahu hyaluron. While they are unka come about our attorney Kobe law. May Allah repay you well, and be pleased with you, as you were dutiful towards me when I was old SubhanAllah. And you look at how he's talking to his mother. And a lot of
times, men think that they don't have to, you know, speak nicely with their mother. In fact, when they go to see their mother, they expect to be served as if they're still a five year old child who needs to be fed, honey
grew up already, you are going to see your mother, you are spending time with her, you should be serving her not expecting that she should be serving you. And if you bring some food that you are not a fan of, then you grumble and you fuss.
This is amazing, this shocking. What kind of behavior is this any look at Apple Gouda, and I'll do one more I know, look at how respectful he is to his mother. I mean, of course, mothers will want to feed their children, even if their child is 50 years old or 40 years old. And that's fine. But you should not go to your mother expecting that now she has to do everything for you. You should go to your mother with the intention that you are going to serve her. You are going to be good to her and begin with your good words. Sometimes when people go to see their parents, they just say Salaam and the sit down on the couch, turn the TV on or you know start using their phone. And the mothers are
sitting there watching watching the face of the son that will he ever talked to me Will he give me some attention.
Any you can check your phone at other times. You can watch TV maybe at another time. Now that you are seeing your mother, give her your full attention be fully present, talk to her say good words to her. Say kind words to her. Make her happy, comfort her listen to her. We see that the righteous this is the way of the righteous that they may draw for their parents. We learn that Ahmed have been of the lab and zubaid He said that when my father or the loved ones have made he died. I made the same draw for an entire year for an entire year. That Oh ALLAH forgive my father. We think making the off our parents once or twice is enough. And he is making dua for an entire year after his
father's death that yeah, ALLAH forgive my father Yeah, ALLAH forgive my father.
We learn Sophia even arena said that the one who prays five times a day is among those who are grateful to Allah and the one who prays for his parents after every salah. Then he is also grateful to his parents. And this is why traditionally, your children are taught.
You know, part of the doors that they can make in Salah is Roger Lima tea masala tea woman de Rio de la Bonita Kabul, Dora, are Burnham fairly well, usually they Yeah, well, we'll move me Nina Yong Wei Coleman Raisa, because in this doll, we are asking Allah subhanaw taala to forgive us and our parents. So whether parents are alive or deceased, you can make this door offer them that yeah, Allah forgive me and forgive my parents. But what does shaitan do? Shavon makes us believe that our parents are toxic, that they're unfair, that they are ignorant, that they are so backward, that they are so abusive, that they do not understand. And we forget to see how toxic we are, how abusive we
are, how ungrateful we are.
Any, if ever, you have encountered a parent and child yelling at one another, I'm sure you can see how the the child has been more rude, more disrespectful in the way that they're rolling their eyes and the way that you know they're talking to their parents raising their voice. So this is what I found makes us believe that we are victims and our parents are, you know, abusive towards us. They have always been abusive with us. Subhanallah we also learned some of the Companions would say that not praying for one's parents makes a person's life difficult and constricted. And if you do not make dua for your parents, then your life will be difficult. Your life will be will be tough, you
will experience constriction in your life. You
Imagine that what will happen if a person mistreats his parents, that they're being disrespectful and rude to their parents constantly.
Now, sometimes you see in your own life that you're struggling, you know, maybe with your work or maybe with your education, maybe in your marriage, or sometimes you see your friends struggling your spouse struggling, you know, in their work in their sometimes in their in their mental health, that they're constantly anxious. So remind them to be good to their parents, to pray for them to give sadaqa on their behalf. Because this is something that the companions are telling us that if you don't make dua for your parents, then your life will be difficult. making dua for your parents brings ease in your life. We learned in the Quran, that Allah subhanaw taala mentions the right of
the parents after his own right. And this is in many places in the Quran, where Buddha Allah wala to shriek will be Shaya what will validate near Santa worship Allah associate nothing with him and two parents do good. The previous nations were also obligated to be good to their parents. We learned in the Quran that Allah subhanaw taala took a covenant from the Bani Israel that do not worship anyone but Allah and to parents do good.
We learn in the Quran that Allah subhanaw taala tells us to be paid to be grateful to him and also to be grateful to our parents. What will signle insanity why today de homiletical, omo one and Allah wa if your silo who fear I remain an ESCO li while you validate illegal mostly, we have enjoined upon man care for his parents. His mother carried him any she she bore him when she was pregnant, increasing her in weakness upon weakness. And his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to me and to your parents, to me is the final destination. If you think about it, the most healthiest the most strongest of women also bear difficulty in pregnancy. And the difficulty of pregnancy does not end
with full term. No, the difficulty only increases with birth with birthing and labor. And then after that, the difficulty continues. Because before she was able to sleep through the night, now, after the baby's here, now she's up every hour every two hours nursing the baby, changing the baby burping the baby because the baby is entire entirely dependent on the mother. So two years, Allah subhanaw taala says over here is weaning is in two years. So that's a that's a long period of of time that a mother dedicates in looking after her baby. And then we see that out of both parents the right of the mother is even greater. Allah subhanaw taala tells us and sort of what was signle in Santa BYD,
they hear Santa And We have enjoined upon man to his parents good treatment homiletical OMO who call her his mother carried him with hardship, while Adar to call her and gave birth to him with hardship. What we saw Luther Athan, a shahada and his gestation and weaning period is 30 months so long had that either Bella should or who were Bella or Marina Senate and Carla Robbie Zerhouni and Ash coronaria Metallica, Letty and anti Layyah. What Allah Worley they were an armadillo Solly handlebar will also they have a fee to the Yeti in the tuba to La we're in a minute Muslimeen
see becoming a parent is life altering. There aren't just physical struggles that a mother experiences in giving birth in carrying the child. But there are also emotional and social struggles that she continues to experience. Women have to give up their studies. They have to give up their work. They have to give up their social life. Sometimes they're they're not able to even talk to their friends. They're not able to spend any time with their friends. They experience isolation. They experienced physical hardship. They experienced emotional stress in raising little ones. When a baby for example is crying non stop any so many women, they have trauma from birth. They have trauma
from looking after a baby on their own. And it's not just mental health issues. Women also experience spiritual laws. They can't fast in Ramadan. They cannot go for taraweeh they can't pray in the night. There. There's so much that a mother is not able to do because of her little child. But she doesn't think she's raising her child or it's because of him. It's because of her. No, she doesn't treat that child as a burden. She lovingly embraces the child looks at
for the child, Allah subhanaw taala is reminding us of what our mothers have done for us. So have some gratitude for your parents. And there are some people who who have that gratitude who who recognize the favor of their parents. So here we are taught that some people they grow until when he reaches maturity and reaches the age of 40 years. He says, My Lord enabled me to be grateful for your favor, which you have bestowed upon me, and upon my parents, and to work righteousness of which you will approve, and make righteous for me my offspring, indeed, I have repented to you, and indeed, I am of the Muslims. So those people who recognize the favor of their parents who are
grateful for their parents who are grateful to Allah subhanaw taala. Who, who repent to Allah, then Allah subhanaw taala says regarding them, Hola, it can Medina dockable, your own home, our cinema Emmylou? Those are the ones from whom we will accept the best of what they did.
Hey, we're concerned that will Allah accept our deeds? Are our deeds good enough? Will they be acceptable? Will they be rewarded? Allah subhanaw taala tells us over here about people who are good to their parents who repent to Allah, that Allah will accept their good deeds, when at the jail was your answer he it him and we will overlook their misdeeds Allah subhanaw taala will pardon them and they will be fee US habit, Jana, among the companions of paradise, wire, the solidity lady can you are doing that is the promise of truth which they had been promised. So we see that the people who are good to their parents, people who pray for their parents, Allah subhanaw taala will accept their
good deeds, Allah subhanaw taala will forgive them, Allah subhanaw taala will admit them into paradise. This is a true promise who are the slip?
On the other hand, the verses continue. Allah says well let you call only validate he Orfila coma. But the one who says to his parents off to you, Atari donnini and Ohio Raja work on the holodeck Kuruman cubberly Do you promise me that I will be brought forth from the earth when generations before me I've already passed on into oblivion. You tell me that there's resurrection there's life after death. What are you talking about? Well, who am I yesterday thank Allah, while they meaning the parents call to Allah for help. And they say to their son, way, look, I am in water. You believe in the word Allah He helped. Indeed the Promise of Allah is truth for Coloma had Illa salaried or
hourly but he says this is not but legends of the former people. And who are these people? Allah subhanaw taala he says such individuals hola Eiken Medina hochkar la human coleauxv umami kata, Kata communicably Aminul genial ins in Kandahar City, that such individuals who are rude to their parents harsh to their parents, they have no gratitude for their parents, and that eventually leads them to coffered disbelief, then such people will be losers in the hereafter. So we see these two opposite characters, that there are those children who are good to their parents who believe who are humble who serve their parents. And then there are those who are very ungrateful to their parents, who can
only recall and remember and blow out of proportion, the, the mistakes of their parents and parents are not angels, they're humans.
And because they're so focused on the mistakes of their parents, they are rude to them. They're argumentative with them, they answer back, they reject and belittle every advice of their parents, and eventually they even leave the fold of Islam.
You see the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said MALAMI Ushguli, Nurse lumea Shula, the one who is not grateful to people is not grateful to Allah.
And the person who is not grateful to his parents. He is not grateful to Allah. Because, yes, your parents made mistakes, but they also treated you well. They also gave your mother gave birth to you, your mother raised you and yes, she might not have treated you nicely. Alright. She because she's human. Maybe she had her own personal struggles. Maybe she was struggling mentally. Maybe she was struggling financially. I mean, we have seen how so many women struggle to raise little children because they don't get the help from their husbands. So many children. That you know, there are studies that show that children are growing up in poverty. Why because of absent fathers. So when a
mother has to work, she has to you know, do
So many things and then look after her children also, then yes, it's possible that she doesn't treat them in the best way. But the fact that she raised the baby, you know gave birth to the baby. That is enough of a reason that you are grateful to her, that you you should be good to her.
Remember that ingratitude is covered doona coffee. It is a kind of cover, which is less than coffee. Okay, but it is a kind of coffee. Yes, it doesn't take a person out of out of the fold of Islam, but it is a form of coffee. And it causes a person to lose their dunya and I feel because look at the ultimate end of such people who are harsh to their parents who belittle and reject the advice of their parents. All right, and what are the parents doing? Well, who am I? Yes, delete then Allah. They're begging Allah. They're making dua for their, for their child who is rude and harsh. Isn't this amazing?
Subhanallah when children misbehave with their parents, what do parents do? They make dua for their rude children.
But when parents may come across as harsh to the children, what do children do in response?
They they begin to avoid their parents. They begin to detest their parents, they don't want to talk about them. They move away from them, they don't talk to them, they don't see them. They
you know, basically cut off from them. And these days Subhanallah this has become very trendy. That you know, if someone is toxic, someone doesn't support you cut them off, cut them off. Subhanallah This is not the way of the Muslims. But there are two Rahim in it cutting off the ties of kinship this is something forbidden. This is not our culture. This is not our tradition, that we cut off from our toxic parents and labeling parents as toxic this is this is very disrespectful.
Then we we learn that in a hadith the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that Allah enjoins you to be dutiful to your mothers. He enjoins you to be dutiful to your mothers he enjoins you to be dutiful to your fathers, you need the Prophet sallallahu Urdu Sana said this so many times. We also learn that the right of the mother is three times that of the right of the Father. And we also see that the prophets of Allah they were especially good towards their parents. We learn about your hero Alayhis Salam, Allah subhanaw taala describes him or her Nana Milla dunya was a cat and what cannot appear. Were above them be BYU today well, Aamir Khan Jabbar Anasuya he was
in a he was very kind and gentle. And he was very God fearing. And especially he was beautiful to his parents and he was not a disobedient tyrant, meaning he would not disobey his parents. He was not harsh and forceful with his parents and your hairline, Saddam's parents, they were very old when he was born. And it's especially hard to be good to parents who are elderly, because they are not able to do things for you rather, you know, because they are limited in their ability. Sometimes they scold more or they criticize more, so it's difficult Subhanallah but yeah, here it is Santa. He was so good to his parents that Allah subhanaw taala mentions that in the Quran reciting his sunnah
He is described as well Bodrum, beware, Lydda T, while a mudra eligible on Sharqiya. Allah has made me dutiful to my mother, and he has not made me a wretched tyrant. Remember, that being good to one's mother. Taking care of one's mother is a good deed which is even more important than jihad. We learned in a hadith that a man came to the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam and he said, O Messenger of Allah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking the face of Allah and seeking the reward in the hereafter. The prophets of Allah who are to send a mass Tim, is your mother still alive? The man said yes. He said, Go back and honor her. The man approached the prophets of Allah who arisen from
the other side, he tried again, that O Messenger of Allah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking the face of Allah and the home of the Hereafter. He said, Is your mother still alive? The man said yes, he said, Go back and honor her. The man tried for the third time and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said go back and serve her way heck in Zimri jolla for thermal Jana. Go back and serve her for there is paradise you want Jana? This is how you get Jana. Go look after your mother. And this is one of the best deeds on the Prophet sallallahu Rosatom was asked which deeds are the best? He said prayer at its early time meaning as soon as the time enter
as you pray salah, and will be rule validating, being good to your parents and then Jihad visa beat Allah.
We also learn
that serving one's parents should be given preference over voluntary good deeds. We we in Hadith we learned the story of judo age, The Hobbit, the worshiper, how he was busy worshiping Allah, you know, voluntary worship and, you know, his mother would come and call him but he would not answer, he would not go to her, he would ignore her completely. And we were in Hadith about how he suffered a great trial because of how he treated his mother. We also learn that
even if parents are disobedient to Allah,
or they are,
you know, doing things which are clearly contrary to the teachings of Islam, you should still be good to your parents. We learned in Hadith about the son of our beloved obey, our beloved obey was the the leader of the hypocrites you can say, and he was the worst of hypocrites. He is the one who will lead so many people into hypocrisy.
And he was very disrespectful to the Prophet sallallahu earlier, the Sunnah. And on one occasion, you know, he said something very rude. And his son was actually a sincere believer. And he got very angry with his father. And he went to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and he asked him, that messenger of ALLAH, if you want, I can bring you the head of my father. And this is how
rude he is to you. I cannot accept that. If you want, I will go and bring his head to you. And the Prophet sallallahu produciton forbade him, he said, No. Well, I can borrow a burqa, and go and be good to your father. Subhanallah we learned in the Quran that we're in Jaha Dhaka, Allah and to Sri kabhi Melissa raka be hearing for now tutor Houma was Sahib Houma for dunya. Moreover, that if your parents are trying to force you to associate partners with Allah, then do not obey them, but still accompany them in this world with appropriate kindness. And this is so amazing. Sometimes, when children become more religious than their parents, they begin to avoid their parents, they don't
meet them, they don't do anything for them, they begin to avoid them. What kind of religiosity is this? We learn that a smart are the longer and how her mother was a much thicker and she came, you know, to her expecting some financial help. So a smart radula more on her as the Prophet sallallahu earlier said, that, should I help her and the prophets of Allah, whoever it is? And I said, Yes, you should. If this is the case with machinic parents, then the right of Muslim parents is even greater.
We learn in a hadith, that a child cannot repay what he owes to his father,
unless he buys him and sets him free if he finds him in slavery Subhanallah and he sometimes children think that Oh, I did this for my parents. So, I have repaid them for the favors that they did to me. No, you cannot, the only cases that if you find your father in slavery, and you set him free, that is when you can repay his favor, otherwise, it is not possible. We learn that when a parent when a person is good to their parents, they receive increase in life and in wealth. In a Hadees we learn that whoever loves that his life term is expanded, sorry is extended, is increased and his sustenance is increased, then he should be good to his parents, and he should join the ties
And we learn in a hadith about how one of the companions who was known to be very good to his mother, the Prophet sallallahu early of Sanam
was shown was was made to hear that companion reciting Quran in Paradise and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam inquired Who is this he was told this is how to die but Norman and the Prophet sallallahu wasallam said killer Colby Colby, that is you know, bit piety. This is real piety, meaning the result of piety is this paradise, and he was very, very dutiful to his mother. On the other hand, if a person is disrespectful to their parents is rude and harsh. They neglect their parents. And this is something very serious. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said Allah has forbidden you to be unsuitable to your mothers. This is something forbidden. When he was asked about
the major sins. He meant
tend to be unbeautiful to one's parents. This is a major sin. In a hadith we learned learn Allah Who man Saba in another narration Menaka validating that May Allah curse the one who insults his parents, or who cuts off from them any May Allah curse such a person who are called validators, you know be to be very disrespectful, harsh, rude, hurtful, and people who are like this, their good deeds are not even accepted, we learn in our Hadees there, they're obligatory and voluntary, good deeds are not accepted. In another Hadees, we learn that riddle love beefy riddle worded, that the happiness of the Lord is in the happiness of the Father, meaning if you want to make Allah happy
with you, make your father happy, was sort of up if he solidly while it. And if you make your father unhappy, then your Lord will be unhappy with you. So be eager to make your parents happy with you.
And we also learn car, or Dylan Mourinho, he mentioned something to the effect of that when a person disobeyed his parents, then his life term is reduced. Any literally his life term is reduced.
We also learn that when a person some self would say that the person who is disobedient to his parents will find his children to be disobedient. And he this is a sin for which you see the consequences in this life. There is punishment in the grave for such behavior. We also learned that such a person who is disobedient to his parents, any constantly disobedient, will not enter Paradise, now of the rights of the parents is that you serve them, that you obey them, you Don't disobey them, as long as they're telling you to do something that is permissible, you will obey them. And part of the rights of the parents is that you serve them in such a way that they become
happy, and that they make dua for you. Because we learn that, that of the doors that are accepted is the draw of the well in for his wallet, the draw of the father for his child. And while it can also be understood as the one who gives birth, meaning the parent for his child. So the door that parents make for their children that is accepted. So make them happy. make them happy, serve them do different things for them, so that they make the offer you because as long as they're alive, you have this privilege that they will make the offer you once they leave the world you are going to miss you know you're going to lose something very, very precious. We are you know, part of treating
parents well is that you do not make them cry. In a hadith we learned about how a man came to the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam. And he said that I made you know I making hijra, and I left my parents crying, he said go back to them and make them laugh as you made them weep go back, you think you have done something huge by making the Hyjal at the at the cost of making your parents cry, return and make them happy first.
And another important thing is that if parents ever make a mistake, then Do not embarrass them. Do not embarrass them Do not you know, be harsh to them, overlook forgive
spend on your parents. And when you have to spend, you know, in in ways to earn Allah subhanaw taala approval begin with your mother, because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said while standing on the member, that the hand which gives
is the upper hand right here to numerically and earlier. And what what this also means is that the that the upper hand is higher meaning it's better than the lower hand. And he said that
start with those for whom you are responsible.
Meeting when you have to spend, begin spending on those whom you are responsible for. And then he said omocha were aback our otaku our A haka, thumb at the neck at the neck. Begin with your mother, your father, your sister, your brother, then the next closest and the next closest, and of course, the wife and children are not mentioned over here because that is not applicable to everyone. Those who are married those men, you know who are responsible in that way then of course, wife and children are understood but the prophets of Allah who are gonna send them over here he was addressing everyone so this is relevant to everyone spend on your mother spend on your father
to spend on your siblings and work hard to earn money and use that for your parents, Mohammed had been sitting, we learned that he would buy the softest clothes for his mother. And he wouldn't just buy any clothes, he would buy the softest clothes for his mother. And on her eat, he would color her clothes himself. And he would never raise his voice at her louder than hers. And he would never speak to her in a volume that was louder than hers. Allahu Akbar. We learn that when Roberto, Ben Cobain when he would remove something harmful from the road, he would say oh Allah reward my mother and father for this also. And he look at his eagerness. Yeah, Allah reward my mother and father
also, because they raised me, they taught me to do all these good things. So when I'm doing anything, reward them also,
we learn that when parents have departed from the world, then we should especially make dua for them because it benefits them, we should seek forgiveness for them, we should give sadaqa on their behalf, especially the sadhaka of giving water to people. We should
even do voluntary good deeds on their behalf. Like for example, you can do hajj on their behalf, you can fulfill their vows and you should be good to their friends and their relatives, you will be rewarded for that. And they will also be
you know, rewarded for the good that you do in sha Allah. Now of the doors that we can make for our parents, of course is first of all, a little bit hum humor come out of Bayani silly Euro, oh my Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up when I was small. I was small I was incapable. I was in need of protection of mercy of love, affection, constant round the clock care and they gave that to me. I can never do the same for my parents. So yeah, Allah, you will give them what I am not able to give them. Sometimes you are in a situation where you are not able to help your parents. Maybe your physical health as such, or you live in a different country you live too far away, you're
not able to do anything for them. So especially make dua gives her the call on their behalf, send them financial gifts, you know, so that their life is easy, but especially make the offer them are a bit warmer, come out of Bayani salido. And make this dog regularly every day. Like one of the scholars mentioned after every Salah another door or we can make up another fairly well aware leader. Yeah, well in macmini in a Yo Yo como he said that, oh my lord, that our Lord forgive me and forgive my parents and forgive the believers on the day the account is established. And this is the proper order of making sure that you first make go out for yourself, then for your parents and then
for other people.
Parents deserve that you make dua for them, especially for their forgiveness, whether they are alive, or they are deceased, whether they are Muslim, or non Muslim, if they're non Muslim, of course you pray for them while they are alive once they have passed away, then you cannot make dua for them. But while they're alive, especially make dua for them after every Salah that he or Allah guide them Yeah, ALLAH forgive them. Any forgiveness will only come after their guidance. So this the dua for their forgiveness includes the door for their guidance from Bunnell fairly well usually they will mean a yo yo pulmonary sab
and then another door or we can make is a Robbie Zerhouni and Ashkelon arithmetic allottee and anti Layyah. What I learned early they were an ARMA Lasala Hunter BA, what are the three Libero hermetical theory by the kosali hain? Oh my lord enabled me to be grateful for your favor which you have bestowed upon me and upon my parents, and to do righteousness of which you approve and admit me by Your mercy into the ranks of your righteous servants. So a man earning his Sena made this dua and you see he asked libido Zerbini Oh my lord enable me and oh Zara is to restrain by for example, restraint when the word is used in the Quran for restraining forces armies. So, the knifes is such
that when it enjoys certain blessing, certain privileges, it can get out of control. You begin to think I am self made. You begin to think I have accomplished all of this with my own hard work and you forget that you are the product of your parents hard work. Your parents have invested so much in you if you are able to speak
Well if you have any privileges you, Allah subhanaw taala granted them to you through your parents, sometimes it's because of the mistakes of your parents, that you learn that there is a better way of living, that we should be more obedient to Allah. So be grateful to Allah and to your parents so so they might arise Sinha he's asking Allah that ya Allah Oh zero any restrain me, you will give me the ability you enable me that I am grateful to you for the favors that you have bestowed upon me. And also I am grateful for the favors that you have bestowed upon my parents. Allahu Akbar, because whatever your parents enjoy, you also enjoy that directly or indirectly. And then he made dua for
his actions that allow me to do actions that you will be pleased with. He's making dua for his children.
Sorry, that that's in that's in the other dog where we are taught to make dua for our children
will swiftly feed the reality but here's today Monterey Santa, and he's also praying for Allah's mercy, and for the company of the righteous in paradise. Another Dora, oh, this is a very interesting dog. We learned that one of the companions
he was asked that make Dora any you know how, when people gather together, they ask someone make dua, so he made a DUA, and they said make more dua. And so he made more dua, and he said, Allahu Majah I'll name in a local ravine which are only mineral hooded ain that Oh Allah, let me be among those who are brought near you and make my mother among the beautiful women of Paradise. And he asked that ya Allah make me close to you bring me close to you and make my mother
a beautiful woman of paradise we think that hurdler in our you know, the some different creatures that will be in in paradise Earth are in first and foremost are who the believing women. And for many children, you know, they see the beauty of their mother's decline. Right? You see how, you know the hair is falling, the hair is turning gray and white. You see how
you know there are wrinkles on the face. You see how the body is becoming weak. Those hands that were so soft, you know are now maybe experiencing some skin condition. You witness your mother, your parents as they age, that their body begins to age any you see their physical beauty decline. So especially he prayed for his mother's beauty, that are the only men and who they lean in the maker of the beautiful women of Paradise.
In sha Allah we will conclude over here so pentacle. Lahoma will be handed a shadow Allah Illa illa Anta a stone Furukawa to booty lake was salam Wa alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh