Suzy Ismail – #27 AsSami
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AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
Salam Alaikum, it's nice to see you all again as we continue to
discuss how we can bring the divine into the daily by
understanding the characteristics of Allah subhanaw taala and
incorporating those characteristics into our lives. So
the name that we're going to discuss today is SM er, which
means we're all hearing.
When we think about hearing and listening, that's one of the
topics that often comes up quite frequently in terms of
communication and miscommunication in the marital relationship. Many
times when we are speaking to our spouse, we may choose to hear what
we perceive, rather than to really listen and understand what is
being said. So for example, if we have already formulated an opinion
that our spouse is selfish, or our spouse is arrogant, or our spouse
is not supportive, then at moments when our spouse may be expressing
a certain emotion may be going through a difficult day, maybe
having a hardship, our reaction may be to project upon our spouse,
what we already perceive of them, rather than really listening to
what the person has to say. Thus, everything that comes out of the
spouse's mouth in that moment will be seen as proving that this
person is selfish, or proving this person is not supportive or
proving that this person doesn't care or is arrogant. And so we
wind up hearing what we want to hear, rather than really listening
to what is being sent. We often do the same thing with our children,
where we may hear their noise, their words, but because we've
already anticipated that they are saying the wrong things, or
they're going down the wrong path. We've concluded that we don't need
to listen until we hear the noise, but we don't listen to the words.
And we'll see this often when our children are younger, and they
enter into our car maybe after picking them up from school. And
they have so much that they want to say, but we hear it as noise
rather than listening to the emotion that may be behind it. And
again, when we shift back to the spouse, often times when someone
is seeking out empathy, when the words that they're saying are
simply a call for a reaction, like a hug, or a pat on the shoulder,
or a pat on the back, and we hear it instead as a complaint we hear
instead, as whining or as disagreement than our reaction to
that person is also going to be negative. So I pray that Allah
subhanaw taala is Semia allows us to become better at hearing what
needs to be heard, and listening to the words not just forming our
own conclusions, or judging based on our perceptions. Just a common
law here and I look forward to our next episode, as we continue to
bring the divine into the daily astrological