Suleiman Hani – How to Embrace Discomfort for Success
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses various "weird moments" of the 10th year after the Roman century, including feeling uncomfortable with attached to a life, discomfort with people coming up with excuses, clinging onto something, and feeling uncomfortable with the heat and lack of AC. They stress the importance of pursuing one's desires and not letting them control behavior, and emphasize the benefits of working hard to achieve success and finding happiness through physical and mental commitment. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of acknowledging one's desires and not letting their emotions hold them to success, and advises against negative thinking and taking responsibility.
AI: Summary ©
Recently I was talking to a brother who
lost 31 relatives
in Gaza.
And as we were talking about
the reaction, the responses, the emotional, the spiritual,
psychological, the physical, what are some of the
things that have happened since then?
Amongst the many things that he said was
that he felt now more uncomfortable with this
world.
Less comfortable with being so attached to this
life, less comfortable with chasing relentlessly
after material things as though there's no end
in mind? What is the ultimate transcendent purpose
behind this wealth, behind your job, behind your
financial,
pursuits?
What's beyond
it, and what's behind it? There's an interesting
moment in history in our sira, in the
sira, the biography of prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. When the Roman Byzantine Empire, it
was said they were coming to attack the
Muslims in Medina. This is in the 10th
year after the migration, after the Hijra.
So the the Roman Byzantine Empire, which is
one of the main superpowers of the region,
is,
not a force that anyone wanted to mess
with. But when this threat started to spread
around as a rumor and it reached the
Muslims, the prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wa sallam
did not hesitate
to prepare to meet the Roman Byzantine Empire.
And so they announced that there would be
an expedition to the area of Tabuk.
And over 30,000 people. The 10th year again
after the Hijra, over 30,000
people gathered
and gathered and gathered, and eventually they departed.
But naturally with massive numbers,
you're going to find in the mix in
Madinah. You're going to find that there were
some disbelievers. You're going to find our hypocrites
who are not actually Muslim but trying to
harm the community from within. You're going to
find weak,
extremely weak Muslims as well. It's all part
of the mix.
They are not all the same people. We
are not all the same.
And so with this, you found that some
people disobeyed,
refused to go out. They came up with
excuses.
They would start to come up with excuses
about why they could not go, even though
they were commanded to leave, to depart.
And as
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala revealed in Surat Al
Tawbah,
there were a number of reasons the Muslims
had to go and defend themselves.
And these reasons are laid out one after
the other, one after the other. And then
Allah
mentions the people who came up with excuses.
When you talk about people with excuses,
you're talking about not those with something valid
because, yes, in Islam, they are excused. You're
talking about people who refuse to go out,
who refuse this command
because
their attachment
to this life was greater than their attachment
to Allah's command. And it was also greater
than their fear of death.
It was greater than their fear of departing
from this world.
And so choosing here the small pleasure of
a dunya
over the eternal pleasure, and the akhirah is
a type of foolishness. It's a type of
ignorance.
And Allah
gave this reminder in the Quran. There's a
rhetorical question with it as well.
All believers. So this is directed at those
who believe and some of them rejected the
command.
O believers,
after laying out everything of the command
of the necessity for you to defend yourselves
and your people and to defend justice,
what is the matter with you?
That when you are told to go out
in fiddle,
here it's a type of expedition to leave,
to depart, to gather.
To leave for the sake of Allah. For
this expedition,
you find yourselves
and there's a in one
When you talk about
there's an emphasis
on clinging onto something,
holding onto something
with an attachment that is intense.
What is the matter with you when Allah
tells you go out with the prophet and
defend yourselves?
That some of you again, this is especially
for those who came up with invalid excuses
that you cling
to the earth. This is the literal translation.
Do you prefer this life over the next?
Do you prefer this life over the next?
The enjoyment of this world compared to the
next is insignificant.
And in this,
you find something interesting with this word.
The scholars say, think about the reality
of a group of people who are being
told to go out and fight the Roman
Byzantine Empire in the summer.
So what are some of the reasons people
came up with excuses? What are some of
their thoughts, their weaken weaknesses that came out?
Number 1, it's summer. It's a long day.
You're going to be going out for a
long time.
Number 2, it's extremely hot, and they don't
have AC. They don't have any of that.
And even today, people come up with excuses.
They're going out in the heat. There's also
a risk for your life. It's very uncomfortable.
Number 3, you are going to be going
a far distance compared to some of the
other expeditions.
Number 4, the dates in Medina were just
ready to be picked. So there was a
an agricultural
or financial or economical incentive
to stay behind.
And number 5,
they are going out not to face a
small random group of people. They're going out
to fight the Roman Byzantine Empire, One of
the 2 superpowers of the region. And they
had reigned in terms of their power for
several centuries.
This was the first time the Muslims were
supposed to go and fight the Roman Byzantine
Empire. So some people for them, that was
a reason to be afraid, so they came
up with excuses.
You're clinging to the earth when Allah told
you to leave.
Here, ibn al Jawazir
he says it could refer to multiple things
amongst them. Think about the natural reaction of
some people who come up with excuses when
they don't want to be
uncomfortable. He says this is desire,
That you find yourselves clinging to your desires
to stay at home, to relax, to rest,
to be in a state of convenience and
comfort. Why would I go out? And sometimes
we don't realize, we keep overlooking
that the greatest vulnerability some of us have,
may Allah protect us, is that door of
desires.
That if you don't control your desires, your
desires are controlling you.
Desires inherently are not bad as we know
in Islam.
Some desires may be bad, but generally desires
are not all bad. We are told how
to direct our desires.
The desire for food is not a bad
thing, but you are told that some things
are healthy, some things are pure,
some things are prohibited.
You are told to eat with a certain
portion. Do not overeat. Look at the medical
issues, the health problems that we have in
this country and around the world. So desires
inherently are not all bad.
Allah talks about desires in the Quran.
But you cannot let your desires be your
religion,
cannot let your desires be your lifestyle.
That whatever my desires want, I pursue, I
chase.
Rather, I control my desires based on a
worldview,
a framework that is coming from above the
heavens, that is coming from the one who
created us for a test, for a limited
time in this world, and told us how
to channel our desires in a healthy manner.
Do not let your desires
be the reason you're not getting closer to
Allah, Be the reason that you're becoming distance
from him. May Allah protect us and may
Allah, Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, forgive us. Number 2,
he says,
can mean hopes for this world. How long
do you think you'll live?
Sometimes we're looking at the situation
in other countries like in Gaza, and some
people will assume subconsciously
that they have a better chance of living
of living longer than some people in Gaza
because of the number of atrocities, because of
how ridiculous it is that we're a 100
plus days in and over 10,000 children have
been killed,
and still it's ongoing, and still it's ongoing,
and still some people are in denial. Some
people will justify.
When you talk about hopes for this world,
the one who really believes in Allah
and believes in the afterlife and believes in
the reality of Al Maut does not ever
think for a moment that the angel of
death is going to someone else. They're passing
by me and going to other people because
they're living in a place of starvation or
war. No. The angel of death assume is
passing other people on the way to you.
For there is a possibility you will leave
this world before someone in a conflict stricken
zone, in an occupation, anywhere around the world.
Number 3, he says,
can refer to your home, your actual residence.
Do you think you're guaranteed to stay there?
Do you think you're guaranteed to live in
the house that you live in long term?
Don't we all know that it doesn't matter
what country you live in? There is the
possibility
of natural disasters. There's the possibility of disease.
There's the possibility of political strife. There's there
are many possibilities. Do not assume
that your place on earth is permanent, and
do not become attached to it. And right
after this, Allah says,
In other words, are you really choosing this
life? You're satisfied with this life
rather than the next life, rather than the
eternal life? And we have to ask ourselves
this question on a daily basis in a
rhetorical manner that will cause us to become
very practical and productive.
Am I choosing with my habits from the
time you wake up and even the way
you wake up and the moment you wake
up? Am I choosing this life over the
next life?
Am I choosing when it comes to temptations,
think about it. If you're tempted, are you
choosing this life over the next?
Are you choosing when you disobey Allah
to please people? Are you choosing this life
or the next?
And when it comes even to your job,
are you choosing the halal over the haram?
Are you being a person of ihsan, a
person of good character in your workplace, as
students in colleges and high schools and other
places as well? Are you choosing when people
are cheating when it seems to be the
easier route to avoid the haram, to obey
Allah
When you choose this life, meaning it is
disconnected from Allah,
it is a matter of,
prohibitions.
Allah
says
The world of a dunya is nothing compared
to the next life. And the word kaleel
here, it means literal literally. When we talk
about Khalil, the example the prophet
gave, and we share this many times. If
you were to go to any coast in
this country, anywhere in the world, and just
look at the ocean and dip your finger
into the ocean, see how much water you
collect.
1 or 2 drops, the life of this
world compared to the next, the prophet
says, is like the one who dips his
finger into the ocean. Let them let him
then see how much water he retains. How
much water do you come back with? Nothing.
Are you choosing 2 drops of water
over the rest of the ocean of the
akhira?
Of course, if someone were to see this
as a business transaction,
you're talking about less than a penny for
an infinite amount of money. Is it equal?
Is there any way to compare this? You're
talking about something limited and something infinite,
something temporary and something eternal.
Only the foolish person knows the reality of
this life and the next and still chooses
this life.
Only someone who is heedless. May Allah protect
us, guide us, and surround us with reminders
that we accept,
with reminders that we follow. 1 of the
scholars, he said,
in this part of the Allah is reprimanding
the Muslims who are coming up with excuses.
So he says,
Allah is reprimanding them for choosing comfort of
this life rather than the comfort of Jannah,
of the afterlife. Because if you were to
obey and go out with the Muslims and
to protect yourselves and defend yourselves,
you're obeying Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So regardless
of what happens, you live or you die.
You live or you die. You're successful. You
have raha, comfort in an eternal life.
And so when we think of these examples,
you realize
the one who created this world,
the one who created this world and the
next is also telling you that this world
is insignificant.
It's telling you that pleasure here is a
distraction. It is a deception. It is very
little, beyond little in terms of the reality.
And so
be uncomfortable
in the pursuit of what is good.
Be willing to embrace discomfort
physically and sometimes even mentally
in the pursuit of something that is great.
Because being uncomfortable in life can have the
potential to change your life and the lives
of so many people around you. Being uncomfortable
can be applied to many things. We're not
talking about being uncomfortable with a medical issue,
being uncomfortable with abuse. We're talking about being
uncomfortable
in the pursuit of success,
that you're willing to go through the hard
work. You're willing to physically be uncomfortable.
So think about people who wake up earlier
than they need to every single day. Why
are you waking up early? Some people will
wake up early. They are sacrificing
for their families. They're taking care of their
children. Some people wake up early because they
go to school. They're after something long term
of benefit to the world, to the ummah.
Some people wake up early because of a
source of income, because of their jobs.
Some people wake up early because of salah,
because of prayer. And so when you talk
about these sacrifices,
you have to be able to see what
you're after, and you have to keep reminding
yourself why you're waking up early, why you're
physically uncomfortable, why are you fasting,
why are you chasing after something great, why
are you working out and taking care of
your health, why are you refraining from harmful
foods, you're after something greater than the discomfort
itself.
It's short term
discomfort and long term pleasure. And, likewise, when
we talk about the afterlife,
short term
discomfort
and long term
pleasure, when you talk about working hard
and striving,
we realize psychologically
that with every technological
advancement
and every advancement in your material state, when
people have more of this world and it
becomes the default standard for them so somebody
gets to a certain place in life materialistically
and they become more comfortable,
the next time a hardship comes their way,
they're less likely to be able to handle
it. What does this mean?
Some people give up as soon as the
pain kicks in. Some people give up as
soon as they thought of being uncomfortable kicks
in.
I remember over a decade ago, one of
the quotes that stuck with me from Muhammad
Ali, Rahimahullah, a famous boxer, somebody asked him
how many sit ups can you do? How
many sit ups can you do? He said,
I don't count the sit ups.
He said, I start counting only when it
starts hurting
because those are the sit ups that actually
count. That's what makes you a champion.
Meaning what? If you're working out and you're
trying to become stronger and endure more, and
we know physiologically you're breaking down muscle, so
we always go with the mantra of no
pain no gain, You literally you will not
find yourself advancing. You're not going to be
able suddenly to lift more if you did
not go through that process of discomfort,
that process of pain.
So, likewise,
you start giving up. Every time you're uncomfortable,
you're not gonna get anywhere.
You're not going to get anywhere.
A lot of people, they see opportunities to
help others, and they start to think of
everything uncomfortable and then they give up.
A lot of people, they start to think
about all the potential things they can do
in life,
the skills
they can have or develop,
the talents, and so on and so forth,
but then they think of the hard work,
and they are discouraged.
They find themselves with very low standards and
ambition in life. Whereas the believer
should know that working hard, striving hard, and,
yes, smart as well, being efficient
is something that will always pay off when
it's in the pursuit of a lost pleasure.
You will never regret it in the next
life.
And that applies to our jobs, That applies
to our education. That applies to the the
development of our children. That that applies to
everything we go through in life. And oftentimes,
neuroscientists,
according to many of the publications,
they find that when people experience new and
uncomfortable things, certain parts of the brain start
to light up.
And if they persevere,
they end up forming new connections and capabilities
able to handle more. And so sometimes you
think today's discomfort
that you're willing to endure
is tomorrow's strength, is tomorrow's success,
is tomorrow's resilience.
You may need it for yourself or for
other people in this world. You may need
it for yourself or for your children. You
may need it for yourself or something you
may experience in the future as well. So
one of the greatest advices according to a
number of studies, don't think in negative terms
that this is uncomfortable for me, so I
give up. Rather think instead of this challenge
is uncomfortable or painful, think to yourself this
challenge is something that will help me. This
challenge is something that I will grow through.
This challenge will bring me closer to Allah.
This challenge will bring me closer to the
afterlife.
So once again,
when we go through these discomforts,
sometimes by choice and other times, it's out
of our control. That's how Qadr works. When
it comes your way, if you're uncomfortable
in a material sense or a physical sense,
sometimes Allah
is protecting you from being too attached to
a dunya.
And so when you watch your brothers and
your sisters struggling around you in this city,
in this country, and all around the world,
in Sudan, in Gaza, in Palestine, in East
Turkestan, in India, in Kashmir, and everywhere else.
When you find people going through pain, make
sure you are taking something from it as
well. Make sure you are growing and developing
and being more resilient as well, because discomfort
can be liberating. Discomfort can protect you if
you are to see the potential
behind it. We look at the situation in
Gaza. We know, and we're talking about this
day and night. Some people are giving up
very quickly. Some people lasted a 100 days
and said nothing is changing. I feel like
I've lost hope. You have to be relentless
in the pursuit of justice.
You have to persevere when you're after something
great.
You commit to the process and not to
the results, and Allah will judge you based
on the process,
the efforts that you put in, not on
the results.
And so if you put in efforts for
a 100 years and you don't get to
the results, Allah will reward you for your
efforts because you were sincere and you tried.
Persevere.
And the reality when we talk about inspiration
from the people of Gaza, we have over
a 100 examples we've given in previous and
lectures, but just think of this one example.
Here and there. Here you are advocating for
the truth. And in the United States of
America,
amongst all countries in the world,
you will find yourself in situations where you
have to be willing
to be uncomfortable so you can speak the
truth. You have to be willing to be
uncomfortable
in different situations,
but to speak the truth. And in fact,
that's one of the greatest forms of jihad,
to speak the truth in the face of
a tyrant,
to give a word of truth in a
situation, in a context in which other people
are ignoring the truth. Other people are justifying
genocide.
We are talking about something that is not
complicated.
Killing 10,000 children should never be a starting
point that is ignored.
So when we talk about inspiration, you have
the example
of the mountain
from Gaza
with a 100 plus other journalists who were
killed, many of them intentionally killed by the
Israeli government.
You have a man whose wife was killed
and he continued to report,
whose child is killed, he continues to report.
His other son is killed. His daughter is
killed. His relatives, his grandchildren.
And he's continuously going back and reporting so
the world can see what's
happening, willing to take on that pain,
that discomfort.
Oftentimes
we want to go back. We want to
find ourselves reserved. We want to isolate ourselves
in moments of discomfort
despite knowing that there's a responsibility upon our
shoulders,
an avenue of helping other people as well.
May Allah
bless him and his family and all of
our brothers and sisters in Palestine and around
the world. May Allah bring down his justice,
his swift justice, and his relief to our
brothers and sisters in every land and every
place. Ask Allah for forgiveness. He is the
merciful, the oft forgiving.