Nabi SAW Husband and Family Man

Sulaiman Moola


Channel: Sulaiman Moola

File Size: 32.80MB

Episode Notes

Share Page

Transcript ©

AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

00:00:00--> 00:00:44

Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil aalameen al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam O Allah maroussi Raj Mehta Lila alameen Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa many Davi Haji wakatobi suniti he Yomi did warband for the college and Nevada kita Hill Majeed wolfer Connie Hill Hameed Rosa we'll learn him in a shape on your rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim. Were any more attune Hafez mym Beverly her new shoes and Robin feller junuh Halima usili has been a woman who was sold

00:00:46--> 00:01:40

for so sure we're into a new taco for in Milan Hakuna Matata Madonna hubiera Sadat Allahu la beam, honorable scholars, the respected brothers, elders, mothers and sisters, we have once again congregated and assembled to reflect over the impeccable legacy of the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and draw lessons from his rich life. Honestly speaking, our sheer assembly today at this juncture on this momentous occasion, itself elevates our profile in the court of Allah. The Hadith is in Muscat Sharif, the first volume page 75 on the strength of Abu Omar the Allahu anhu. A person came to the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he asked which is the noblest piece of land.

00:01:41--> 00:02:24

The messenger sallallahu Sallam said, I am not away I will ask gibril when gibreel A Salam came Nabi sallallahu wasallam posed the question to him gibril A Salam said malama Sulu unhappy and Amina sur le Ana Viva La Salatu was Salam. I do not have the answer, but I will pose it to Allah and I will return gibreel la Salam leaves and subsequently returns what the answer, but before he communicates the answer to the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says to the Nabhi of Allah sallallahu Sallam in need the know to mean allowing you to know when murder no to mean Hakata or messenger sallallahu wasallam is mentioned to you. I took your question and I presented in the court of a law.

00:02:25--> 00:03:10

I was blessed with such closeness and proximity and hospitality, that I never enjoyed this in my entire life. In the footnotes of this hadith under harsh and number six it's mentioned, while Alessia Ruby he sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he had the hill Mara Lita women Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam waka de Mohave bofi Mira, Sunil Habibi, Gillian, Habibi. The reason that gibreel la Salaam was given this additional hospitality, because in this particular position, gibreel did not only come in the capacity of an angel, but he came is the messenger of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam, which elevated his profile

00:03:11--> 00:03:40

waqqas He is the total mohab bofi Mira Soleil habibollah jaleel. Habib, and how often the messenger is made important simply because he has been sent by the beloved's our topic at hand is the marriage life of the messenger sallallahu wasallam as a husband and as a father. Someone said it very aptly and succinctly what is marriage? It is work in progress was a lifetime contract.

00:03:41--> 00:03:59

You have a company built the building roads to your contract. They put up a complex three year contract, they putting up a mole five years, work in progress was a lifetime contract. While another said love often intoxicates marriage always Silver's

00:04:00--> 00:04:24

love often intoxicates marriage always Silver's and probably the best and has been set in my humble opinion. And that would set the tone to explain the life of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam. The formula to a happy married, happy marriage is not to wear the perfect partner, but rather to love the imperfect partner perfectly well.

00:04:25--> 00:04:59

The formula to a happy marriage is not to where does the perfect partner, but rather to love the imperfect partner perfectly well. The messenger sallallahu wasallam was impeccable Allah has blessed him with the sublime character. His honorable spouses and noble consorts were mortals and so was the messengers a lot. He wasn't a model, but Allah had blessed him with our intimate and protected him, while his wives was a novelist of all woman, but surely they had the common challenges and emotions that any woman had to contend with. Hence, the unique

00:05:00--> 00:05:12

of the messenger sallallahu assumes marriage was not there it was hiccup free, or they were no glitches or they were no snakes. As I will briefly endeavor due to the time constraints, my emcee said he will speak for an hour or so.

00:05:14--> 00:05:24

Then Allah had to contend with the usual things that any marriage had to contend with. But what made it unique was the manner in which he responded and reacted.

00:05:25--> 00:06:11

The Hadith in Bukhari Sharif sobre the Allahu anhu says, Sharon Guna Matura correction with a group of Qureshi nazli. Vanessa Anna, as long as we lived in Montreal, we had clout we had muscle we had authority for the Medina Medina when we came to Medina, either como la boom Nisa, Ansari brothers were amazing hosts. They were great. They were awesome. But when it came to domestic issues, they were on the receiving end. They were passive. They were gentle they woman govern rule and dominated them for toffee khanyisa una Hosanna min. At the beanie silencer. A woman started assimilating with the Ansari woman. They started becoming louder in the tone. They started responding retorting back

00:06:11--> 00:06:30

answering So one day I got into a bit of an argument with my wife for Raja acne. She responded harshly for anchoring to the garlic I said I don't like that. That's in bad taste. She said well, he Mattoon Kira was Alec and Omar Why do you object in as virgin Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam lay your agenda Who?

00:06:32--> 00:06:38

Even the wives of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam back answering him. I can just imagine the woman posing.

00:06:40--> 00:06:45

I can just yeah, Yes, you heard it right, my sister but you're gonna be hearing other things also.

00:06:47--> 00:06:56

Behind every successful man Behind every successful man is a woman. And behind every angry woman is a man who doesn't know what I did wrong now.

00:06:58--> 00:07:25

Behind every successful man is a woman and behind every angry woman is a man who doesn't know what I did wrong now now the poor man starts calculating from last night. Okay, maybe I came late No, but then she still smile okay this morning. Did I not leave cash? No couldn't be that because after I got a pleasant SMS for man grappling, my friend is a pilot. He sends me this picture of a cockpit and a flying deck. All the buttons is a complicated but still easy to understand in a woman.

00:07:27--> 00:07:31

riff can build a real riff can build

00:07:33--> 00:07:59

the messenger license it be gentle with them. Malala Rahmatullah says why should be honey sir, Bill Ferrari service 31 what he was writing in KSR, the Navy of Allah likened woman to glass in three things. delicate, weak and fragile fragility. Very, very fragile and the Navy of Allah said it explicitly categorically.

00:08:01--> 00:08:40

So my wife told me Listen, Omar don't take an issue with me even the Vla salaams wives retort and they respond and even your own daughter does this Gemma to CRB. I gathered my clothes I dashed off I came home, I called I summoned my daughter to her, Zeebo. Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam Listen, oh hafsa this is what has come to my ears that you at times and given to be of Allah and sometimes you have an argument and for a good day either you don't speak with an MP of Allah doesn't speak. Is there any truth to this? Yes, indeed. That's the Absolute Truth while I that is how it is, doesn't my daughter Get your act together? Don't displease the name of Allah sallallahu wasallam and don't

00:08:40--> 00:09:21

get any ideas from your co wife or inshallah the Allaha. Her profile is very unique, her status is different. Her position is very unique. So keep yourself within your profile and don't offend anybody over la sallallahu wasallam in any way. I then came to the visa lottery with them and bounced it off him. I said, I want to be of a law. I don't know if you'll agree. But no matter who nissa Anna in Macau, we had no issues. When we came to Medina suddenly a woman started drawing this skill from the Ansari woman and now they are becoming more loud and assertive with us for the summer. Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says and looked at Amara just smiled. Okay. Then

00:09:21--> 00:09:42

I said, Don't ever ever lie. Don't have sir. She mustn't get ideas from her co wife, your other spouse, and She mustn't become loud with you. The best sama Rasulullah sallallahu. The best to metal. I promise you sometimes everything can be resolved if you can just maintain a smile, not sarcastic or cynical, earnest and honest and you will dissolve it.

00:09:44--> 00:09:59

In fact, this very same Homer the giant, the mighty, the robust armor, that even the enemy would switch lanes. Even the enemy even the devil would switch lanes is forward and come cross him. Even rumor had to contend with

00:10:00--> 00:10:42

balls in his marriage. Omar was also summoned. during his reign. He sends Mahajan plegable Ravi Allahu anhu to benu. Caleb collect this occurred in distributed Monrovia. Ilana obliges and complies. He goes off, collects the socket and distributes it. The norm was whenever anybody came to collect Zika to distribute as a token they would acknowledge this envoy and gift him something. Cigna, Mahara? Yolanda returns home. His wife said How was your trip? It was great aina magic to be here Mima TB Hill Bula to minha de him. Everybody goes they come home with something your pockets are empty. Your bags are empty. Now of God when you just caught on and you have to explain something

00:10:42--> 00:11:06

katakana Mary rotti Bonnie Yachty when you see Elijah, while there was a guardian watchful over me monitoring my affairs, meaning Allah is taking care and Allah is over me, and I went for a purpose. I didn't want to dilute my endeavors. The woman must understood it, she must understood it and if she must understood it, it could be quite difficult to change her mind otherwise respectfully.

00:11:08--> 00:11:40

So she says that means Omar had imposed someone to monitor you because he didn't trust you fully could contain amin and fiancee rasulillah amin and Omar amin and VIP Bucklin some Roma Rue la cara Kiba la Elena Beatrice Did you Abubakar had no reservation, suddenly Omar has apprehension. She dashes off and she goes to the wives of Omar. Now this is the flip side of polygamy. When things go wrong, it can have ripple effects in all the houses

00:11:41--> 00:11:57

as Shabbat daily goofiness, whatever. You know, there was a brother good friend of mines in Australia who were going for a drive between this big van it's a shack I was struggling with my wife. I told her you know what, I'm gonna fill this hole van up with kids. She said you dreaming? I said no, it doesn't have to be your kids.

00:12:04--> 00:12:45

She goes to the respective homes of Maria Lohan who and she tells the wives of Omer. Listen, you must tell Omer He mustn't involve himself in the matters of my husband was Allison to be trusted him and he has no authority. The giant Omer is summoned. That giant honor the point I want to make, and I hope my time allows me what made the marriage unique was not that there were no issues or glitches or hiccups or arguments. It was the manner in which they responded that that is that is what resolved it. Amara Yolanda comes home. His wife says listen, only his wife that was his wife was here and she was complaining and moaning and groaning and why would you want to put someone to

00:12:45--> 00:12:50

monitor the affairs of moron? Almost said I have no clue that I did this but someone who has

00:12:52--> 00:12:53

ripple effects

00:12:54--> 00:13:25

is called on birth to Allah katiba. Did I put someone in place to monitor your face? No, not at all. With supposedly This is what your wife said to my wives. Well, the truth is Omar when I came home, I was put in the spot. I just told her there was a guardian. This is what she understood and I couldn't change her mind. Otherwise, the narration goes so beautifully for the HCA Omar Ahmed says the buck stops here. The point is understood. He even dissolves it with a broad smile, puts his hand in his pocket takes out something he said go and buy her a lavish gift from my sides.

00:13:29--> 00:13:35

I really want to speak on certain aspects of the life of ble Salatu was Salam. And the first is

00:13:36--> 00:14:11

especially in the climate in which we live where much focus is on external beauty, where everybody has become finger conscious. I was reading a book on CBT cognitive behavioral therapy, in that they say 90% of women today suffer image anxiety 50% of people of youngsters who smoke do so to suppress an appetite. 69% of men were interviewed and they said they wish they looked like others. So when this is the image consciousness people have of themselves can you imagine how conscious they will be about their partner?

00:14:12--> 00:14:54

Can you imagine how conscious they will be? The advertisement the billboards this constant invitation to the external beauty and the cosmetic things of this world. When we look into the life of nebulae Salaam, we find that there was a fair amount in its moderate balance, an element of sustaining love, affection, infatuation crush over the spouse and this relation continued and I'll briefly share this with you because sometimes unfortunately, we in the beginning that the couple is very excited. So we want to eat together. So do I give the muscle first or does she give the muscle first what we eat together, whoever gives it first and then we don't eat at the same time never

00:14:54--> 00:14:55

meant when the same plate

00:14:57--> 00:15:00

the Hades is in Buhari the

00:15:00--> 00:15:09

Have you ever less analyzed him? He's relaxed. Are you Sharia law nudges him are loners? altova do look look at the communication look at the chat.

00:15:13--> 00:15:40

Oh my beloved Habib sallallahu wasallam Can I quiz you go for it I'm all yours are ain't alone as altova deal if you're traveling and you're on your camel and probably you hold at some desert Wolfie has shutter button Okay, let me know what shutter rotten lamb you can mean her. And then there are trees from which the animals are coming eating grazing and moving on. And in this clean, untouched virgin tree for a year fee Hakuna Matata Iraq.

00:15:41--> 00:16:26

Where would you probably take your camel to graze only of Allah sallallahu Sallam? I shall the answer is obvious. No, but say you don't have a lot say you don't have a lot. I would take my camel to graze from that tree from which no animal has eaten. Yeah, Annie and Rasulullah sallallahu some Lamia does Bikram yoga. And she was modestly implying that from all your spouse's and your consort, I'm the only spouse that has not been previously married, and rightfully so we heard the couplets and let me just share it again with you where she speaks about. The poet speaks about the privileges that Allah had given to our Chateau de la Juana. marshadow own milma mininova Shani, who de Mohave

00:16:26--> 00:17:22

Bala, Bala Shani inni akoto MOBA Yin un* bullied her Moto G man colina belissa ne yo mobile de la de Cabo mohammedi, Albania to bt Makka Makka nee nee cosas torella Nisa a Mohammed mohammedi basically flat D building tahuna murni was a backhoe to one illegal football illegally her first sub acusa booty one liner? No Anna Annie, married one bu Amata be Natasha a be funny yo yo me was Zama Nusa Mani zoji Rasulullah he Lum Rahu Allah who's a Virginie B he was a Bernie

00:17:25--> 00:17:29

Ameen up sumati Benny mo

00:17:31--> 00:17:34

Ernie, a baker who lives

00:17:35--> 00:17:53

in DC Rue who was yg roho theme and xili Kamani what the llama love will lovely mubi for jetty or baba LTV masika middle port Ernie long who have funny word vomit

00:17:55--> 00:18:00

or Allah Elisa Nina v bhawani la

00:18:01--> 00:18:08

caja Nicola and the bottle Baba it be Luca be hi Romani long who want

00:18:11--> 00:18:29

to see if I can was up behind if so movie Shani in Nila masana is rebury atone. What delino for snipper hottie Hassan II, Allahu la sua nanny Bihar Tammy Russo Lee.

00:18:31--> 00:18:40

If you will boom tourney or Samir etowah Hey ally here in the mohammedi mangifera illa

00:18:41--> 00:18:45

Shani, aha la he was going to

00:18:46--> 00:19:05

be for HANA la vista will be here for Bernie manda eufa Irani, Monza you youfor see Rooney were young kiros Betty one more Hamadan, fee free, Judy. Bernie.

00:19:07--> 00:19:56

What if I can tell you what has been contained in these couplets? It is mind boggling. I'll just briefly run you through few stanzas, who the Buddha The one who loves our Isha because of a position to nebulae Salaam will be guided by Allah Shani and deviant is the blasphemous individual in the opodo. mobian and unfortunately her Amitabha German and totally happy sunny I endeavor to speak and expound on the sentiments of our isharo the Aloha yamabushi Lila Cobra mohammedi, if you have resentment and you despise me, then don't come to the grave of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam you need to know for the baby to Beatty willmaker new macaroni. It's my house. It's my abode in Neha sister

00:19:56--> 00:20:00

Allah Nisa, mo hamady, Allah gave me privilege over the spa

00:20:00--> 00:20:58

have nearly Salaam in many ways mehriban Naboo Amata pinata EBI Allah decreed Allah ordain the death the demise of nearly Salam in my house in my home in my lap in my arms. Maria Barnaby Yo mama Sabina tala AB fell yo yo me, and that just reminds me of the couplets of Sophia or the yellow one Ha. Whenever you have a law passed away she said, Li ke la can Leo man karna baqia la I'm Rima baikin ble mo te wala Kinley hora Qian Karna Tikka Tikka Masala long horrible Mohammedan Allah jettison Serbia three Bursa via Aurora Hassan and atento who was a doctor who you Becky via Rue de julio mana. Phaeton Li rasulillah Amoeba quality sobre todo para la love Theresa letter saw the Moto

00:20:58--> 00:21:11

Saliba Dini a villager Sofia fellow and Nora balharshah Gattaca Bina sorry dinner, Allah in Qin Mo kana mal de la camino de la Salaam,

00:21:12--> 00:21:56

wa jannetty mina la de neuroglia. She said listen, when others cry we say stop now your beloved has passed away Take it easy, but who ever wants to cry today? You have a license to cry I'm not going to stop anybody the greatest human has passed cry. Li ke La Mancha Anna Bercy la lamrim abeking v mo D. Trust me I'm not crying over the demise of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam. As much as I am crying over the crisis that will grow up and rocked the planet post the demise of nearly Salaam one old man passes away in this havoc in a family. One scholar from an institution goes and does mayhem in that institution. Can you imagine when Mohammed butts farewell to this world what would happen to the

00:21:56--> 00:21:57


00:21:58--> 00:22:48

I'm Rima abeking. Nabeel mo de Wella Kinley Horrigan Karnataka Dr. Fatima Sana la hora boo Mohammad inala Jetta getting em Serbia free Battaglia Oh Fatima me the blessings of Allah descend on the bless his soul of your dead. I cannot look at Hassan he's screaming out to his maternal granddad who has moved on sebata you persevere Baba love Teresa sadhika and you diligently conveyed the message of Nebraska. And you left Dean bright and radiant only bubala fellow and Nora balharshah. Sabina, Sally Donna. Oh my words. Follow hon. Arusha, taka baneasa Donna Umbra huka nama Leah, if only Allah prolong your stay within us we would be ecstatic we would have been overwhelmed, but who can temple

00:22:48--> 00:22:49

with the decree of destiny and

00:22:51--> 00:23:11

May the blessings of Allah descend upon you? Surely Jeanette is also waiting for a long time as you are happily ushered into the gardens of Jana. So I started the Atlanta set up of a law passed away in my lab then she goes on to say zoji Rasulullah My husband is the nephew of Allah. I don't know another man. love

00:23:13--> 00:24:03

Allah who's aware Johnny behavoir Benny huji burrito. I mean up so far have been ill Mokhtar Rowena, Ronnie, you see, she's a matchmaker and she hooked them up. Allison gibreel with my image to Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam when the paragon of illustration glanced at me he loved me at the instant the first glance Allah who's over Jenny be here hi Bonnie watamu jabril Amina B. Swati. Daniel Mokhtar and a big crew who last name is virgin spouse in the zero who is confident Virginia who I am his roommate, Freeman z comma, Ronnie and his two great colleagues and companion Abu Bakr and Omar these two moons are sleeping in my house. What's a kilometer long will have removed before jetty wa

00:24:03--> 00:24:52

t FEMA Camille Karani and ally exonerated me in the Quran. What's the Kalam Allahu Allah Halima before jetty what Bara Allahu Allah tala if can was enough Sufi Shani I don't want to go into the couplets will take up too much of my time, but is the last stanza Monza you first Irani Monza Ufa who, who has the audacity to still deny my privilege? Who has the audacity to still deny my privilege, while Mohammedan Fie Hijri he robbed Bernie when Muhammad SAW some molded me groomed me in my own in his own lab. I heard from my honorable teacher and May Allah preserve him, and you heard it from your mom and good luck to you. Said I heard it fresh from jabril when he was giving it

00:24:52--> 00:24:59

to Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam was Samir Otto, Allah hearing de mohammedi MinJae barra de la mano

00:25:00--> 00:25:39

Rahul, Shani. I'm sitting here and he's chatting with me and he says is just pause gibreel has walked in my word my word can you comprehend Can you comprehend so we set the first point is that in the marriage we need to have some form of warmness love affection, this thing needs to happen then a b ovalized. Returning from a campaign and with his daughter or the alarm on home, then it be over the last priority is to perfection as to Pinnacle. Returning from a campaign it would just keep a person that much higher in terms of spirituality. I'm talking on a general note otherwise then a viola was at optimum on every level. I just have a flesh in my mind in the footnotes of

00:25:41--> 00:25:41

Buddha with

00:25:42--> 00:26:08

the great work of Manali Ramadan, pooraka hula is mentioned there that when we exit from the loo when we exit from the toilet, the teachings of the Navy of Allah is chronic. Chronic Oh Allah forgive us. The question is why do we ask Allah forgiveness when we didn't commit a crime in the toilet? Today? Maybe we do commit crime so today you need to double ecfr Today you have a right that you can you know run with it.

00:26:09--> 00:26:12

Because you know what this chattiness what's happening everything is happening in the in the loop.

00:26:14--> 00:26:17

I had an amazing idea were in the toilet or the shower.

00:26:22--> 00:26:23

Why did the number of Allah say

00:26:24--> 00:26:43

because his heart and his tongue was perpetually moist in the remembrance of Allah when he was relieving himself his heart was still connected to a lot but the location denied him to verbally after the glory and the to him the greatness of Allah so due to the location he was unable to articulate it when he exited Oh ALLAH forgive me.

00:26:45--> 00:27:10

Anyways, whenever you have realized return in Java, you going ahead of us watch all the excitement are married on a Viva La awesome, great, wonderful. What's it someone young or old? What's gonna be overlapped? Okay, no Brother, you shouldn't be talking these type of things now. Now look at the Nebbiolo we need balance brothers we need balance. Sometimes by at each level. We forget mosquito theorists money has written taking active steps to love your spouse is not part of the things of this world is part of Africa.

00:27:11--> 00:27:34

You know, say no, don't love this world. That's dunya don't love your car debts things of this world. Don't get attached to the worldly mundane things, rightfully so. Don't get attached to your spouse now getting attached to your spouse and winning his or her confidence from both sides. This is part of Dean chubby, elderly or young or slightly elderly. Hello, Big Crunch to learn what to learn.

00:27:35--> 00:28:11

What to cook, chubby someone young man, you could have a bit of fun. You could ever but I'm paraphrasing scholars are sitting here may Allah guide my tongue did I ever say anything out of line to Dhaka to Baku, to learn Reba to learn every book. There are sisters here. And I want to be modest as well. But I want to capture the essence of the translation. You could have some fun on a viola I had different reasons. My dad had moved on. I had siblings, I was looking for someone a bit mature that could take care of my siblings and be a spouse to me, as up to your wisdom is great. But that's just the thought that I thought I would share with you. Wonderful, wonderful. We know the incident

00:28:11--> 00:28:47

of Abu talha and homeschooling him and we've heard it multiple times, the union is going through strain there's a child that is sick. Now this happens in times and I said this and I'm going to repeat it again. If a man comes home to a healthy marriage, a stable marriage and established relationship, trust me, it is adequate to empower you to become resilient to all the challenges of life. You can go out you can perform you can deliver you can flex your muscles if you come in home, your batteries getting charged properly. But if everything is good at home, in your life, in your business, in the economy, your kids, but you're not coming home to a healthy marriage. The

00:28:47--> 00:29:14

collective prosperity in the respective spheres of your life won't be able to give you muscle to become resilient in your domestic challenges. That is how amazing and how important our marital structure is. It's the foundation. So the marriage is taking strain. And there's a child that is sick. It obviously takes strain on both partners. The husband goes along as well. The child passes away I just want to make an anecdotal reference and move on.

00:29:17--> 00:29:26

In the interim, the wife gives herself to her own child, the husband returns how's the little one doing? Who else can do me makaan

00:29:27--> 00:29:59

I haven't seen a woman in my mind and thought in my research and my understanding, who has condensed all forms of therapy psychology, wisdom diplomacy in one statement like Omitsu named me the countless blessings of Allah descend on this blessed soul. How's the little one? My wife he is more peaceful than what he was. He is more peaceful than what he was. He positively interpreted what happens then. Dammit Ella Hill, Asha sheep.

00:30:00--> 00:30:16

present to him the dinner of the day. He eats the food. The narration of Muslim summit the Santa hatillo Santa Monica Santa Rosa home in public. Then she decorates she calls herself up.

00:30:17--> 00:30:36

She the narration of Muslim she doles herself up her husband at the janazah of her son is lying in their house. Islam has great you want to go for a marriage workshop? You want to go pay a good $500 study the secret of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam they say marriage is a workshop you go you don't men work woman drop

00:30:45--> 00:30:49

she decorates herself What can I be a he's a man he came home is tired.

00:30:50--> 00:30:56

You say you know this man he wants to get married the second time is only for last. I see okay, in the first time was for what?

00:30:59--> 00:30:59

Forgive me I'm

00:31:02--> 00:31:49

alima long who I know on set as guru Nirvana Allah Killa tuba una Silva. Oh my words. I leave him alone who and GM said that guru. Allah Killa to redo hoonah sir one when a woman is in it that then Allah says I know you men you won't resist not speaking about her animal Allah knows. So it's no problem. If you give a hint to put a message in while she's in it that just a hint nothing more. Please let me let me qualify my statements here. Let me qualify my statements here. To put a hint and say listen after it is over. I am interested. Our Deen is complete. Our Deen is wholesome. Take it in its complete embrace.

00:31:51--> 00:32:14

He then has relation he has relation conjugal relations, can you imagine the contradicting emotions in the life of this woman. But she understood the duty and the responsibility that I need to decorate and adorn myself for my spouse and vice versa, vice versa of the lightener boss that I used to always be defined myself because that's precisely what I want my wife to do for me.

00:32:15--> 00:32:30

Fela Mara, and shabbiha these words just fascinate me. When she seen my husband's belly was saturated, his thirst was quenched. His physical manly need was taken care of. She said darling I need to talk to you.

00:32:32--> 00:32:42

My sister if you can welcome your husband like this and they after he doesn't listen to you you can throw a tantrum for the rest of your life.

00:32:43--> 00:32:58

And I give you a license you can kick up a performance but not if you from from from the phone you know friend of mine. He says my wife phones at work then answer where you If only network. It's a landline.

00:33:00--> 00:33:01

We you

00:33:02--> 00:33:06

and for the benefit of woman and because my wife told me please balance your jokes.

00:33:09--> 00:33:21

I can just imagine anyway. So they say what's the issue with men? If a woman phones her husband, then you disturbing me. And if a man phones a woman, I love you. So I was thinking of you.

00:33:24--> 00:33:26

If a woman advises her husband, you're dominating me.

00:33:27--> 00:33:32

You're interfering in my life. And if you don't advise you see you're not even concerned about me.

00:33:34--> 00:33:40

When she's seen all was done, she said I need to talk to you. Talk to me, my husband. Talk to me my wife, I'm Liz

00:33:41--> 00:33:42


00:33:43--> 00:34:03

You want to go for psychology? You want to go for therapy. You want to go for all these workshops. Look at the gentle euphemistic diplomatic engagement. Listen, listen, love, I need to ask you a question. If somebody borrowed us something for a period of time and the duration has leaped Do we have the rights to still keep the item after the duration that they borrowed it for his expired?

00:34:04--> 00:34:12

No, not at all. But where you're going with this theory? Allah borrowed us our son the duration has expired.

00:34:17--> 00:34:59

Allah borrowed generation continues. I just wanted to mention this and continue. If you study the lives of the Sahaba You would be amazed how natural it was. Attica winters they'd been amor been no fail or the Allahu anhu a woman of exceptional beauty. She gets married to have the Rahmani baby Baqarah. A stray arrow hits him on his chest. He claims his life and he passes away. So she sings couplets lamenting his demise was early to Latin *ery nissa t Nathan alayka wallonian faco gil de la barra on my husband, I would cry so much over you and this is the bond upon us evening, Robbie levy says and praise them

00:35:00--> 00:35:40

People don't know about this son in law. He has not accepted Islam. His wife Xena, the first daughter of nearly Sam had accepted Islam at that time it was still permissible. The Quraysh had mounted immense pressure on him. Felipe Sahib attack doesn't divorce your wife. We don't have any issue with you but you can't be married to the daughter Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam Mohammed Maha Nelly in Uttar Pradesh in Nakata, Allah Allah Takata Libyan Erica, listen, we might differ on other issues, but I never would want to substitute my wife for any woman on the earth till the day I die. The Navy of Allah acknowledged him had destiny for saadani Well, what are the need for Fabi? This

00:35:40--> 00:35:46

man took my daughter's hands and what he claimed the day he took my daughter he lived with it till the day he died.

00:35:49--> 00:36:02

That is why the same secret said Nah, man when Rukia Mickelson passed away, nobody Elisa Lam said if I had multiple daughters, I would line them up each one one after the other family father in law's would want to do that he might be regretting his first move.

00:36:07--> 00:36:07

So anyway,

00:36:09--> 00:36:32

after the period goes satana Homer proposes to her so she says no, I can't get married. My husband gave me a garden and he said, I love you so much as a gift don't get married to anyone. And that reminds me of something I read in the field of crochet allama Abu Qasim, crochet Anissa Buddha Shafi has written this year, I read this I was like, Wow, look at this map. For in palatka, Fela, Luna who member

00:36:35--> 00:37:11

people ask the rationale and the wisdom in the logic that when you pronounce the third talaq, then you cannot wait your wife until and unless she doesn't move out of this marriage, she has to re marry, he writes and you can reference this and I read it myself directing is to feel the wisdom, the potential wisdom of this restriction, or this condition that Allah has imposed that once you give the third talaq, then your wife has to get married to someone else. And that relation needs to be consummated. And if at all, it gets dissolved, then it that has to occur and post that then she becomes permissible and legal for a first post. He writes, it is a human nature that a man is

00:37:11--> 00:37:34

possessive over his female members. And he wouldn't want to in normal circumstances, imagine his wife getting married to someone else. It's something that a man would hold and want and desire that this is my wife and my spouse, and I can't imagine her with another man. So because man's nature his possessive nature wouldn't allow that. Allah said, Listen, if you're going to give three catalogs that what you dread is going to happen.

00:37:35--> 00:38:00

That which you dread and despise that's going to happen. So Allah put this barrier in place that the consequences will be catastrophic if he pronounced the third the log, to make men restrain himself and not issued the lock, the 65th chapter of the Quran 28 just surah Talaat four pages five times Allah tells the men for me what the kalon hopatcong on a tequila

00:38:01--> 00:38:06

Raja Amaya Tati, La Jolla, Gianna hoomin Embry, Yusra

00:38:08--> 00:38:10

Yuka Fearon hussaini de

00:38:13--> 00:38:14

la jolla

00:38:15--> 00:38:36

la de mano cadenza La La, la convict a lot of serious money foot noses we I read this in four pages five times Allah said, hang on, fear me how you deal with this woman. Five times Allah alerted you tapped on your conscious be cognizant of the responsibility on your shoulders.

00:38:38--> 00:39:18

So anyway, save normally proposes to her she says no, I have a garden my husband gave me almost said consult with the scholars and the jurors consulted alira Delano Alito delana said no no return the garden and you can get married. So the garden was returned safe now Homer then gets married he calls Ali for the walima now since ahavas, lives with general normal casual at the walima Satan alley, the giant the legend the luminary the great man. He tells save number 11 Lee who can Lima ha can I have a word behind the curtain with your spouse is to go for it. Or early to Latin *ery nice Athena tan, la cola young Saku Gil de Barra. Attica when your husband passed away, I told you never gonna

00:39:18--> 00:39:29

dress up and you'll never get married. What's happening? message at next gen Alia she gives off a cry. Amara delana nudges Ali says Ali hang on is my first night you can do this to me.

00:39:31--> 00:40:00

See the early early look at how natural and normal we move on the second thing that is of paramount importance while we need to have love affection, warmness and all that there has to be provided that is the root that is the soul. The Hadith is a Buddha with Rahim Allah who Emma and may Allah have mercy on that man come Amina Lail, who stands up in the night and then a Tata Allah he awakens his wife or the wife gets up, she revives her husband and they both engage in prayer. You won't have my daughter or his wife. You will have the

00:40:00--> 00:40:42

Muhammad Sallallahu sallam. When Solomon first he got married and he met with his wife. He said hey, Timothy it cliche in America Hey, I'm going to advise you something would you listen jealous to Melissa Utah, I'm all yours. I'm all yours. asani Holly is a testament to Allah, Allah and Allah tala has a gel. My hubby told me when I start my union I started with the obedience of Allah. They go in isolation they engage in prayer look at this incident of Abdullah bin raha both sides, recreation fun in worship. So Abdullah bin Ravana is having a moment with his wife in her house she excuses herself is slave girl was in the house as well. It was a slave girl, not domestic servant,

00:40:42--> 00:41:08

slave girl the rules of slavery we understand the juristic rulings, etc. He had the need to share the bed with his spouse, what the slave girl the wife had excused herself. He goes and he has the relation of the complete relation is his wife walks in and she sees him there. She goes into panic, she becomes hysterical. He gets up and he advances and he sees that there is a knife in her hand. Maria Maria, what's the matter? She's like you still asking what's the matter?

00:41:11--> 00:41:18

Whether you know, my my friends, friends, friends? Why don't you say female friends over Whoa.

00:41:19--> 00:42:02

mafia mafia. What's the matter? Nothing lower. I took a painter I took the old job to have been a karate fake. If I had to see you when I saw you, I would plunge this in your shoulders. Did you see me? You know what? No, no, no, if I had to be there, I would have been impure. I can read Quran for you to prove ampio Okay, read Quran or phenol rasulillah here to look at Baba Kama rufen mineral surgery se or an algo de lama soccerloco nappy hemo cleaner. You know people want to go out they want to go to carnivals they want to go to phase. They want to have fun. Sahaba love natural normal lives. So what he does, he doesn't read Quran he sings Arabic poetry but what a melodious tune. So

00:42:02--> 00:42:37

she says, I'm going to build our kids up to build buzzer Okay, if you read in Quran up to see how pure and clean they were, then I deny what I seen and I believe what you said. But he was a believer. It started playing on his conscience because I wasn't reading Quran I was in the state of impurity. So it comes to the Navy alone of evil. That is what happened. I didn't do anything wrong. I was just having relations with my slave girl. But obviously my wife was uneasy with this whole thing. And he got a bit ugly in the moment wasn't too good. So then I just proved that I'm pure and I read poetry, Zakir rasulillah he had no clue. Abdullah Bandra has said in my whole life, I seen

00:42:37--> 00:42:58

him laugh, but never so much till his blessing became exposed. Yet the same Abdullah is in the lap of the same wife. And then tears trickle down his eyes. We can be having some fun my wife and we can be spending some quality time. But we can also be checked into a lot together. What a sight What a sight. And again is the Father. Let me say this laser show you one

00:42:59--> 00:43:23

morning. miniato Jetta What? Marina de la casa del. You can throw some people by seeing their children in an assembly. You can throw others by seeing their children in a graduation. You can fascinate others by seeing their children in a drama lesson. But you can only threaten the believer by seeing his wife and children in Allah's obedience. There's nothing else that fascinates a believer, there's nothing else that intrigues a believer.

00:43:25--> 00:44:01

So you sit in with his wife, he looks up and then he starts tearing, his wife looks at him and tears trickle down her face. He asked his wife what makes you cry? She says, My beloved, I was sitting here and my thoughts started running. And I started imagining the Yama you know, today we love so much but on Tiamat we don't know where we will be. And then comes the time to cross the bridge. And then I wonder if I'll make it across the bridge. And she says what are the key for brigade? I wasn't sure what made you cry, but just to know my husband is in pain was enough to make me cry. When I'm in the lap of my wife, do I have a flash of an eye I have a flash of another woman. Allah forgive I

00:44:01--> 00:44:45

am fantasizing May Allah say one in all. So the second point that we need to understand also coupled with our love and our affection, there has to be spiritual time there has to be time together. The Prophet of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Ilana walks in he says the moment is right. It is only over lamonica to alpha me Allah homophily eyeshadow Mata dama means done Bihar Mama, Mama, Mama, Allah This is my I love her so much ALLAH forgive her minor major inner outer previous or future. I shadow the Alanna said I was so elated my head fell in my lap. Navi salatu salam said Maja Sookie, I saw what makes you so excited. Even though you may dwell for me, you may dwell for me. I sat in the

00:44:45--> 00:44:50

dark with the Illuminati. To me. I make the doll for my woman every day.

00:44:52--> 00:44:55

These are the Ilana was another woman Oh my words.

00:44:57--> 00:45:00

She was 40 when she came into the nick of my family was

00:45:00--> 00:45:37

selam she was 65 when she moved on Jimmy Rola de sala de la silla minha Ibrahim all the children were from Korea with the exception of Abraham radi Allahu anhu from Maria tipo de oro de la la. He had another state called Rihanna rhodiola on her way, I mean after vinyasa he sallallahu wasallam la casa, she was related to the Navy of Allah sallallahu sallam. Khadija was the daughter of Hawaii, who was the son of acid who was the son of Abdullah was the son of course, I go into ancestry of vlsm to say is the ancestor of nearly Salam. So khadeeja ancestor ngvla cylance ancestor becomes one candidate to the filter helia

00:45:38--> 00:46:03

her title pre Islam was changed to amazing Mazel Tov Allah had a minister in Libya salallahu alayhi wasallam Mazel Tov Khadija eyeshadow delana said from all the woman I knew my position was anchored in establish I was in threatened or intimidated by anyone. But if there was someone who threatened me and intimidated me, and I'm paraphrasing, it was Khadija de la Juana. But the most amazing thing is I never seen

00:46:04--> 00:46:09

I never seen her. There was a little moment with Selma, but then I realized I was on top.

00:46:10--> 00:46:11

There was a little moment with

00:46:13--> 00:46:47

Vanessa, Vanessa. Whenever his son got married to him miss Alma has into his ninja Dida, I went into a depression straight I went into a depression Why? They told me she's very beautiful fertility doula I camouflaged to her I seen her for widget to have alpha was effectively meningioma. And when I looked I realized she was way more beautiful than what I heard. You know, sister phoned me She said, my husband took another wife. I said, Okay, what can I do? She said, I don't want to see this woman. Okay, but then I feel mama What's up? I should see her No.

00:46:51--> 00:47:30

What do I do says to go find it. Good luck. I don't want to see her. Okay. But something tells me No, I need to see her. Go find that Fatah tough do I camouflage have I seen her? For what just to have I seen she was way more beautiful. I got more depressed. I bounced it off hafsa Wakanda yet, and he didn't have signed me we belong to one group. So there were two groups. There were two distinct was the Atlanta it was the Atlanta it was sold out of the alarm and it was Sophia the Atlanta and other spouses respectfully in one group. So this is how to understand and then you have Allah with his composure. He managed everything. Anyway.

00:47:33--> 00:47:34

What was I mentioning?

00:47:42--> 00:48:12

I shall Miss Mr. Viola mana. I seen her then I bounced it off. hafsa. So have suddenly Alana said she is beautiful, but not what you thinking. You are just becoming nervous and excited. And it's your pride, and it's your feeling and your emotions. So I went back and carefully balanced rational I look properly. I said No, you're right. You're right. However, she says if there was any person that really threatened me was Khadija Amara to her. And I didn't see her. But I can kind of

00:48:13--> 00:48:41

look through the crowd. But then we have allow us to just speak ours about Khadija. And then robot Mazda hotshot. Sometimes a sheep would come, they wouldn't be much food at home. But he would say let's slaughter this year. And can we send this to all the friends of my late for the job? All my words, all my words, my sister, have you put that impression in the heart of your husband and my brother? Have you lived that legacy to impress your wife?

00:48:42--> 00:48:42

So my

00:48:43--> 00:49:24

dad is a DJ, he would send us to the homes of Khadija for Obama called Tula who sometimes I would say the hula Mia confit dunya in LA in La Jolla. I hope you don't mind. Was there another woman that came under service besides Khadija I'm just asking. These are the words literally Was there another woman? That is awesome. So the short answer is conduct work on it. She was out of the world. She was amazing. The narration of the Atlanta said Canada the camera for the for the job, when he would start praising Khadija Lam. Yes, Amina Sanna la Ha. Well, it's different. You couldn't stop him now from praising when there will be up if you started him on Khadija there was non stop. She was

00:49:24--> 00:49:31

amazing. She was wonderful. She was phenomenal. She was unique. And then tears would well in his eyes and the non stop two hours.

00:49:33--> 00:49:37

Do we have that in our marriages? And I must say something Yeah.

00:49:38--> 00:49:59

It's important that we praise one another. Healthy we need to learn to acknowledge compliment extol the praises. So there is a verse of the Quran and I think this is very key today where we take too many things for granted in our relations. We take too many things for granted. Something that is a favor, we take it as a deal. And that changes our attitude. A lot. Oh,

00:50:01--> 00:50:36

It will sell them in the 22nd juice to regime and Tasha woman when we come into sharp woman you better read me man hasn't a fella Juna ha la de la cadena takahara you know who Noah, Noah Yoruba Nina Pima Tito naku Kowloon owner you have a long, you can postpone the chance of anyway. So with all your spouse's, you exempted from mutual rotation, then Viola head all the polygamous relation, multiple spouses and to crown it, Allah gave him concession, you don't have to balance it out.

00:50:37--> 00:51:17

You don't have to bet so you can postpone this and I'm going to visit you for five days. And then if you've put a woman on hold, and finally you decide you want to call her, you are at liberty to call her woman, every man has a fella Jonah, there's no issue you shouldn't be feeling guilty or apologizing. But that's not all time is short, that alica at dinner and Takara You know, when we instituted this concession, not only in your interest, but in the interest of your spouses. Now that would raise the alarm bells that would give me put my thinking cap on how does this become a concession or an ease or a privilege or a perk for the spouses, the scholars of the year expound

00:51:17--> 00:51:18

just on a level

00:51:19--> 00:51:35

that one of the greatest challenges in marriage is when a person believes this is my right? So when your spouse thinks this is my right, she will be anxious, she'll be waiting, come home come home, obviously your wife brother is different. We got to be balanced out on time and you know, whatever, multiple visa single entry however it works.

00:51:37--> 00:52:11

But when you know something is you're right, you waiting, and if you come late, you become anxious. But when the wife knows it's not her right? Now she will value whatever she gets, by way of example, you stranded on the road and you're a member? And if they come late, which they likely do, you're gonna have a good you're gonna have a go with them. And you're gonna say no, this is not on when I'm paying a fee, I expect the service. And this is this is not on, you know, I'm going to terminate my membership. But a person you don't know from above. So he stops after three months, after three hours, you're not going to look at him and tell him it's time to stop. It is time to stop, you know,

00:52:11--> 00:52:33

I'm waiting for three out brother so kind of your really unmet needs. So even if he only offers you model support, why? Because you know that that is a favor not to do today, unfortunately. And that's exactly for your spouse's that when you come they welcome you that mind, nobody's given me a chance. And it's not his right. But you know, what's the beauty, then it'll be over law never opted for the concession nevermind abused it.

00:52:35--> 00:52:58

That's a separate topic. And I've given a talk on this. And I don't have time to expound and deviate into this year. Never ever never opted, never opted even before his death. Generally, you have miles and you know what is going to expire, then you create a flight just to redeem your miles because you're going to lose it. So why why for nothing, just go for a holiday, good luck. before passing away. I never exercise this right. Let me just use it now. And his health did not permit even then he didn't use it.

00:53:00--> 00:53:38

Often in the marriage, I want my wife to look after my mother or assist my mother or not that my mother needs it. But just to do something for my mom, I need to know that that's not the duty of my wife. That's her kindness. As a man, I need to go the extra mile to tell her it means so much to me. Really my wife, this is a surprise. This is a gift. You cook this for my mom, I am so humbled by your gesture, but now to impose something on her which is not her right? And I'm not saying don't make her do it. Let's let's have things objectively, I'm saying if you want it, it's your mom and rightfully so. You need to play the balancing act. That is not my wife's duty. It's my

00:53:38--> 00:54:04

responsibility. She's doing me a favor. I need to acknowledge it. And if my in laws are coming home and they put it up there for a few days, it can take a bit of time. You know what I mean? So my wife, you also need to see me right. You also need to acknowledge and compliment me and acknowledge me vice versa, things that are not part of our duty. We take it as a deal. It causes major problems in the marriage, then Allah is setting ups.

00:54:06--> 00:54:47

But I know he won't he won't put me under pressure. The guys can be that hungry. So these are the Alanna knocks on the door. These are the olana sister knocks on the door. Look at the love. Oh man holla nobody says him use the knock. He says that is so nostalgic. That is like my late Adidas knock out of a state of deja Oh my goodness. I used to knock like that on the door. I shalonda said I couldn't hold myself. Does guru mean I use him in ZBrush camera Shane Abdullah kilo Pharaoh Amina whenever you will Am I gonna be your teacher till I die? Nobody saw some common compose.

00:54:48--> 00:54:59

Composed are meant to be if California nurse said the Putney if the bunny and nurse will certainly be Marley. Her is harmony and nurse. Actually you will not born

00:55:00--> 00:55:28

The whole world looked at me skeptical she embraced me. Others withheld her funds. They she put her funds before me. Others doubted me she embraced me you don't expect me not to sing her praises you don't expect me and then to be organized the father again. The narration isn't higher to Sahaba is sitting with him under the law. There's a knock on the door in de la dako Fatima in the oh this is my Fatima knocking at the door. When you say he was hands on.

00:55:30--> 00:55:32

You say he was hands on

00:55:33--> 00:55:34


00:55:36--> 00:55:36


00:55:37--> 00:56:17

Tina. Tina famously ha This is not usual for my Fatima to come it's an odd hour if she came now there's something panic in Marina Oh my word look at the number of allies a father and a husband. She walks in modestly expedite things only be over labial Monica Tomahawk deal with the speed what that means for matamanoa only be over the angels glorify Allah use of b1 la la, la la la after en la ESP Punahou been totally well whom BM re mailloux on viola, this poverty in our house. It's me. It's your son in law and your grandchildren. Can you imagine what a test this must have been for them to be over law. You don't want to see your children in that position. Fatima. I can teach you five

00:56:17--> 00:56:56

words of Dean. I can give you some goats that have come in Well, I've got a tetanus news. There's some goats I can give you I can teach you something make a call on a beautiful law Teach me those words. And I will take that to heart and I will pass it back to my husband. Cooley say Yo what a lovely and serene wairakei Misaki and yopu within Mateen yamawaki mean Fatima takes the words she goes back home does that have to mean rindy Caledonia wa to will after all my husband I left with the with the desire to bring food but I came back with some after he says you came with something more wholesome than what I had dispatched you with you go with a shopping list and come back with a

00:56:56--> 00:56:56


00:56:59--> 00:57:20

nevermind come back with a DA you come back with the trolley full and buy one item wrong so you see you get for you. You get the heavyweight for lightweight foil I'm gonna give you one example I'm not the only man that shops if you are a lightweight don't buy heavyweight you understand what I'm saying? If you're a lightweight for you just lightweight that's it but like it said you buy lightweight.

00:57:21--> 00:57:24

Anyway let's move on time is running a badly

00:57:25--> 00:57:47

Oh my word soda. She was this amazing wife, elderly jovial hilarious keeping everybody laughing whenever you have a law divorced her generations don't explain why she sat down. I read the verse what any moron ha FET meme babbling ha no shows and arroba philani Jonah Halima usili ha

00:57:48--> 00:57:49


00:57:50--> 00:58:20

Olivia velata nocturnally Mujahideen widget De La Habra en good you badly no you have not. Please revoke me and take me back in your marriage. I have taken you and revoked you back in my marriage ought to be over live moved on from the need of men. So I want to be your wife live as your spouse die as your partner and visit resurrected as your wife and I'm happy to give my day to your wife our Isha Miko wife because I know you are very fond of her. Please accept that but keeping in your marriage

00:58:21--> 00:58:24

what anymore at one half a member

00:58:25--> 00:58:37

and if a woman fears ill treatment or a version from her husband, this was obviously not for nearly Salam there's no ill treatment of abuse. Harsha wakulla I'm quoting an IRA independent what a nimra

00:58:39--> 00:59:05

member Alina new shoes and if a woman feels ill treatment or aversion follow Jenna la Hema usually have been a woman. Then tell them to sit down to see them as a hurry. They must first pay in Houma resolve it yourself, please resolve it. Somebody said in English, if you're not happy with something, attend to it and resolve it. Otherwise, you will have to spend a great chunk of your life with something you don't like.

00:59:06--> 00:59:44

You're going to be miserable. You're going to be depressed, fix that relation work on it. You need to come home daily. This is where you need to take amnesty. But the Quran say so beautiful. Look at the philosophy and the wisdom Whoa. And for So sure, intrinsically inherently inborn to our nature is what we are selfish and we are greedy humans. So Allah says when you're going to make a piece both are going to be selfish. You need to create some concessions, some work to stimulate that partner. I'm going to give this concession to you I'm going to give that concession Listen, okay, I did this wrong. I'm apologizing. I will give this compensation to you this financial. We are having

00:59:44--> 01:00:00

an issue with our parents. I'm having an issue with your parents. You haven't for a moment. Let's do this. I'm not going to put pressure on you to visit my parents. You don't put pressure on me to visit your parents. Let's make this compromise. Come weekend. You're free to go Come weekend. I'm free to go. I'm not saying keep this indefinite. Let's give a breather. Let's give some space.

01:00:00--> 01:00:21

The Quran says make peace and the Quran uses Fela, Juna has no harm. scholars say why did Allah adopt this phrase no harm, because the apparent engagement is almost like a bribery. I give you this, you give me that. You can read my full Quran and you'll see what I'm saying. It's like a bribery analysis. This is a wholesome form of a parent bribery. Because end of the day, the couple is together.

01:00:22--> 01:00:40

The couple is together, now the greatest ingredient and I'm going to touch on two three things and quickly run through. What is it it's tolerance and for parents, if that's in order, the marriage is in order. So the first was revealed. Johan levina, Amano in the mean as well, Jacob, what can I do? Well,

01:00:42--> 01:01:17

the Sahaba migrate from Mecca to Medina, some woman kept the husband's back, you can migrate open Malik every time he wants to join a campaign. No, no, you can go stay behind. So the woman and children kept him back. Allah said listen, some of your spouses are not playing the role. Some of your children are becoming impediments. They are not your children, and your wives they are your enemies and Allah categorically explicitly said, so when Allah reveals the verse, the Sahaba decided to now be a bit, you know, stringent and harsh towards them, that Allah said you are enemies. So Allah didn't reveal the next verse. Yes, what they did is wrong. But there's no place where I love

01:01:17--> 01:01:20

you to forgive as much as I love you to forgive in your home.

01:01:22--> 01:01:30

Why? Because in the whole Quran, Allah hasn't brought the three words of forgiveness together in one verse like Allah has done it in this ayah. Sometimes Allah says,

01:01:32--> 01:02:13

sometimes Allah says, well, amen. sobre was afara Allah says we're in for what does what doesn't 00 my words? What in What does or what doesn't? Zero? Listen, it's your child, you're gonna have to forgive Romani Allah, Lucy writes in his ear, and I read this myself, that we have to deal very delicately with the mistakes and the violation of our spouse and children. We need to despise the wrong but we can't despise the individual because Allah calls us to forgive. We need tolerance. Really, I cannot tell you how often in an argument it can be ugly, it can be butter, it looking deep, it's looking bleak. And it is give it few hours and the time the dust settles, and then you

01:02:13--> 01:02:41

start seeing the chemistry jelly and clicking again. So when it was revealed the versus exonerating eyeshadow, the olana and the vs came down there nobody ever looked at it and said, Shiri I Sham Allahu Akbar, Rocky. I said, good news. Allah prove your innocence. I shall have the Alana's parents stood up and said I shall stand up and hugging Avi salatu salam ala Hola, como la de la. Mama say thank you. Allah revealed the Quran I think Allah

01:02:42--> 01:02:42

Allah is

01:02:43--> 01:03:06

now in how often we in the latter part of resolving it and it gets ugly again in the end. Just at that point, something gets ugly, but nobody ever realized this was petty. One narration goes on. Nabi sallallahu, Sallam said, I placed my hand into the hand of Ayesha, Santa. Santa Satya, she pulled her hand away. I'm sure if you married you, you know that.

01:03:07--> 01:03:11

You know you're trying to patch up. Leave me. Okay. No problem.

01:03:13--> 01:03:18

I'm not allowed to give secrets but I mean, I don't think there's a secret that happens everywhere. I shall

01:03:19--> 01:03:32

not be I shall do you know this is the hand that's flipped the moon. I shall do you know the virtue of this? No, no, no, no, this is a woman having her emotion and the nebula gave us space and time tolerance tolerance. The last narration when we conclude you

01:03:34--> 01:04:13

know Josie has made mention of it man mentioned of it in a llama Nisa who Allah is going in a campaign and all his spouses are with him. Okay, he's balanced on his maturity, his composure. They move in, but we're having a bit of a snag here. I shadow the Atlanta is light in physique. She's petite. a camel is suave. sephirah. The olana is a bit heavy in weight, and her camel is sluggish. And because of that, Sophia is moving slower than the viola is moving slow. The crowd is moving slow. So everybody's going slow. So maybe slightly rotated his gaze. He worked out the whole thing. And he said how we know Metallica Sophia Allah Jamali, Ayesha omata, Isola Gemini, Sophia, which is

01:04:13--> 01:04:49

going to stop here just do a quick Sofia. I shall we need your luggage on Sofia's camera. You light her camera is sluggish. So it will move faster. Sophia the Alana's got a bit additional luggage. Now not like oh, Sophia you got so much luggage Where you going? Like you know things like that. Where are you going? You know you're so nasty. You How could you tell me a thing like that? And sometimes we don't realize what we say whatever words we offend, we insult. We make derogatory inflammatory comments and the tongue it can be sharp gentleman who has severe Judo Kabir. It's small, but it's crime can be offensive. We don't hurt anyone. We got to watch how we talk. And we don't say nice and

01:04:49--> 01:04:56

often I say to couples, when you're having an argument. Don't vomit too much. Especially when you have to wear the same clothes.

01:04:57--> 01:04:59

You throw out things ugly and

01:05:00--> 01:05:21

isn't bad and then you have to get together again. It's it's a lump it's a lump it's difficult to swallow. So behave yourself manage yourself control your emotions don't have an outburst regulate your tantrum, it's got to be within limits you answerable. They say regardless of what people tell us, we are responsible for the manner in which we react, we can be better or better

01:05:22--> 01:05:43

regardless of what he said, What he said is what he said what she said, but how you reacted, now now you overdo it and this is a separate thing in the Quran. If you said something if somebody told you something, you're a victim, you're a victim. But when you retort if you said worse now you're the oppressor you no longer the victim. We run for the victim mentality forever

01:05:44--> 01:05:53

you receive but then if you went over the mark then you no longer the victim. So anyway, when this change of luggage happened then I started the Alanna said

01:05:54--> 01:05:56

the fella Patna Hill Yahoo dia,

01:05:58--> 01:06:01

this woman of yahoodi descent she gets away again

01:06:03--> 01:06:18

and now we often have the people here with the airport you know we want to act i mean if it's me I want to ask you to behave behave behave don't throw a tantrum people are watching people are watching this is gonna be ovalized 100 to the whole oma is the one named manasi Coco

01:06:19--> 01:06:35

Coco learn from me we're not gonna meet again here in Mina again, everything of his exemplary his wife is having an outburst this woman gets away again we saw some nice calm is composed unless that does Romana naka rasulillah but you claim you're a prophet. Whoa.

01:06:38--> 01:07:00

I should have Yolanda is having an emotional outburst respect to my mother. Her virtues you cannot comprehend. I just give you a taste of of those couplets otherwise it's mind boggling. She's having an emotional outbursts. But you claim to say you're a prophet Nabi sallallahu wasallam smiles and says our fish shakin and I said everybody else has accepted you got any doubts though?

01:07:04--> 01:07:10

No. So if you are told or you're a doctor, or you think you're an international speaker, and to my amazement, your profit

01:07:12--> 01:07:51

your profit. Lisa Simpson, are you in doubt? I suggest look at what did I say what made it amazing? It was not it was hiccup free, it was glitch free. It was how he's allowed himself to manage it how he conducted himself. Our fee shakin ante. Are you in doubt? No. Holla Holla conveys justice in your life my camel and amateurs give it to someone else. Now, it was her belonging and then a bit of electrical easy, but it was sensitive. abubaker interjects nobody saw some sense of a worker stand clear, stand clear. Respectfully, but I think my daughter overstepped the mark of a bookkeeper. I've told you this before when a woman is having an emotional outburst. She's not cognizant of the

01:07:51--> 01:08:27

directions around her nevermind what she's saying. She doesn't know front from back right from left. Now that's the time you got to manage yourself and behave yourself. We ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to install and infuse and imbibe within us, the great the pure legacy of the messenger sallallahu wasallam. And I make dua earnestly and honestly any couple that is taking strain, I hope and I pray that advises that were rendered by the esteemed scholars. And whatever I said in my humble capacity, we will take it home and we will reflect it deeply. And this would be a means of of patching and reconciling for many religions. Because that is what Allah loves. Allah grant us all the

01:08:27--> 01:08:52

understanding, and once again, I'm grateful to the honorable MC and to the masjid and to everybody else for affording me this opportunity. There are so many great scholars and Allah and the brothers and the sisters and those that have organized you've come out in your numbers in your scores in your multitudes surely whatever we've come here is the life of Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam and we need to leave from your with a greater impact so that we can have positive effects on others Israel inshallah.

01:08:53--> 01:09:11

Bismillah Ramana Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam, ala l mursaleen. sabena Maulana Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi Arjuna in Urbana Tina dunya Santa Rosa Santa mattina

01:09:12--> 01:09:16

Allahumma geologie, tema de mer, mer, Houma.

01:09:17--> 01:09:21

membre de roca masuma Walla

01:09:22--> 01:09:30

Walla Walla inertia p Yola, Roma Baba habla de Minas, Virgina was Oriya Tina pour water on

01:09:31--> 01:09:35

13 EMA robina Tina Fey dounia Asana,

01:09:37--> 01:09:49

Asana hatanaka Now, a lot of emails left lane 18 and a lady who are in SMA two and Marina was left Lana toniann latifi Hamas una was left Elena to channel at

01:09:50--> 01:09:51


01:09:52--> 01:09:54

Luna de

01:09:56--> 01:09:59

la luna Min kinesia Allahumma matassa

01:10:00--> 01:10:38

angora Yuna Willem de bello houmous Allah tuna, Minh Jolla dounia will fetch Alana Minho fall asleep, a lot of whom may nearness el camino de masala camino Moraga wanna be yoga Mohammedan sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when Naruto becoming the master Mr. hodda caminhada wanna be Yuka Mohammedan sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and tell him was Don Juan de Bella Walla Walla Walla quwata illa billahi Lani Allah subhana wa Karabiner Is it on? The phone was Salam Ala Moana Selena was hamdulillah in Europe in LA. I mean