Shadee Elmasry – Is Phone ADDICTION Secretly Ruining Your Life
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AI: Transcript ©
This usage can be regulated.
Why we are addicted is because we don't
regulate it.
There's no things that all right, I'm going
to be on social media from this hour
to this hour.
And at 7pm, I'm going to put it
actually in the trunk of my car, like
as if I buried it like a mafia
buries a body, right?
And, and it's not coming out.
Your life is going to be different.
Like, how much Twitter is enough?
How much WhatsApp is enough?
Like, do I have to be do my
colleagues at work have to be able to
call me at any time?
The answer is no.
Right?
How when does this thing begin is the
other thing I'll tell you what's the worst
thing to start your day off on the
wrong track is to wake up and the
first thing is you reach for your phone.
That's why I don't even sleep with it
in the room.
I consider it like a rat, a mouse,
right?
I don't want to sleep with it in
the room a cockroach.
Don't sleep within the room.
I got my flip phone for emergencies.
My flip is for emergencies.
Anyone want to reach me after hours on
emerge on the flip?
This thing this devil is the devil of
taking away my attention.
It's it ruins up my schedule.
All right, we schedule wake up.
All right, you're gonna want to work out.
30 minutes, just light work.
Then I'm gonna read for then there's fetch
pray fetch.
Then I'll have a nice cup of coffee
and sit with the computer and start working.
That's the first two hours of your day
or whatever.
Six to eight or something like that.
This thing will throw that off so quick.
You won't even know what happened.
It'll be AP 8am you did zero.
And you feel accomplished because you answered some
WhatsApp and you made some tweets and you
got a call up to date on what
who's doing what this is such a waste.
So this thing has to be buried into
your trunk.
Right and use your flip phone for emergencies.
But it's all about saying this is where
it starts and this is where it ends.
And that's staying ahead of the of the
curve rather than being dictated and succumbing to
something.
100% like you know, I'm sure some
people listening to this like, you know, oh,
man, this guy just he just play exercises
all day.
And there's all these thoughts like, you know,
Oh, it must be nice.
He lives in Turkey.
He seems to exercise all day and all
this kind of stuff.
And, and I understand where that comes from.
You know, I understand where those thoughts come
from and that kind of stuff.
But I can't tell you how many hours
people waste.
And like, well, like I run a company,
you know, I have a company that does
other things.
I guess I'm not a professional athlete or
professional coach or do 114 for a living.
This is just my side stuff.
Like, I have real like have my job,
my work, my company, my other things.
I have four kids, I have a wife.
But people waste so much time, scrolling hours
and hours.
And I sound like I know what I
know is that no one's stronger than the
algorithm.
No one is stronger than the algorithm.
Like, you can because what people don't understand,
like why the phones are so addictive is
that if you read the book hooked, you
know, they've learned how to hack the dopamine
response systems, like they know how to hack
dopamine, how to make you feel good very
quickly.
You said nobody's stronger than who?
The algorithm.
I see, I see, I see.
The algorithm is almost like a nafs in
that it knows you better than you know
yourself.
Like, you know, it has a tactical advantage.
It knows, the algorithm knows you better than
you know yourself in the same way as
the nafs knows you better than you know
yourself.
Well, you know, Shaykh, your qareen knows you
better than you know yourself.
Your qareen has been observing your habits.
And that guy's been alive for how many
thousand years, that jinn?
And he's, you're like assignment number 5000 for
him.
Exactly.
That's the algorithm.
The algorithm is your qareen.
Like, it's infinitely smarter than you.
It knows a lot more than, it's probably
listening to us, you know.
And so, what you said was, is exactly
right.
Like, no one's stronger.
Like, that's why you physically have to put
it away.
Like, even when I'm doing a training class,
like in my professional capacity, I have to
tell the people to put the phones away
from their eyesight because I am fighting something
that's just...
You can't win.
You cannot win.
And most people have this in their families.
When their families, there's certain times that it's
time to be together.
The phone can't be in sight.
Like, you just cannot stop except for reaching
for it.
And if I'm not reaching for it, I'm
thinking about not reaching for it.
I'm telling you, it's, again, I don't know
what we're doing to our kids between the
phone, energy drinks, the food that we're feeding
them.
Well, that's why they're all screwed up.
They have so many issues.
Their teeth are crooked, their eyesight's crooked, their
hair is frayed, they don't sleep right, their
skin doesn't look good.
We're producing a whole generation of screwed up
kids.
It's not our fault in 100%, but there's
a lot that we could do.
Like, I'm really worried about microplastics, but what
are you going to do about it, right?
But this stuff we can do something about.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
I mean, there is stuff, but the problem
is, even as parents, our attention is so
fixated on these things.
We're not paying attention to these kids.
It takes a lot of attention of us
as parents to go and monitor what they're
doing.
I gave my son his first smartphone when
he was 17.
You know how hard that is?
That's like going to war.
Because his friend started getting him when he
was 12.
Now I'm dealing with my daughter who's 16,
and it's just so much easier to say,
fine, just, you know.
And let me tell you something else, too,
is that when it comes to these devices,
besides all the parents, there are controls on
Apple.
Apple's trying to win over parents, and they
have a lot of ways to control it.
But the other thing is that, again, it's
got to be handed in at some point.
I put mine away on a good day.
When it's a good day, I put mine
away, and I control it.
If I don't control it, it's a bad
day, right?
It's literally a bad day.
The whole day is spun out of control,
so I missed the workout, missed this.
Now I'm just like...
And then you can get yourself embroiled if
you're undisciplined talking to people online.
You step on some mines and stuff, right?
Because think about what you said.
You had a bad day, and so you
want to feel good.
You want dopamine.
The easiest way to feel good...
Because humans want to avoid feeling bad.
That's why the makers of these phones and
apps know.
We don't want to feel bad.
We don't want to feel uncomfortable with being
bored in the bathroom.
So they know that.
We can't even handle the discomfort of the
boredom of going to the bathroom.
Crazy, crazy, man.
It's crazy.
Crazy.
We can't go to the bathroom without these
things anymore.
We didn't grow up that way.
We grew up, you and I, without these
things.
There was such a thing as boredom.
Yeah, such a thing as boredom.
It's the end of boredom.
Yeah.
The end of boredom is a very weird
feeling because I distinctly remember Sunday evenings, there's
nothing going.
And you are just bored out of your
mind all of Sunday afternoon.
And you're, in a sense, a bit depressed
by it.
And that's a part of life.
But then the next thing, what you did
is that you reset.
Because now you can enjoy the next thing.
And the next thing can be a big
deal again.
Why can it be a big deal?
Because you went down a hill, now you
can go up a hill.
Now the next hill that appears has meaning
to you.
You can feel something.
Now we have a situation where no one
is ever bored.
So the hill just has to keep going
up.
There's nothing that excites anyone anymore because you're
always up, never go down.
There was, if you understand happiness in this
world, when something great happens to you, when
you're at a height of happiness, don't try
to keep it going.
You have to accept yourself to now have
a phase of hard work and no results
and boredom and nothing great is happening.
That's what I call resetting.
You have to reset.
And if you just want to be happy,
happy, happy, that's like sugar, sugar, sugar, you're
going to get diabetes.
And spiritual diabetes is you cannot no longer
see right from wrong.
All you want to do is gouge upon
happiness.
Which is the surefire way to misery and