Salem Al Amry – Lesson 16 Weekly Class Virtues of Islam
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AI: Transcript ©
Sheikh,
we
Sheikh, we are ready when you are
I'm ready,
Okay. Let us begin.
Brothers and sisters,
Assalamu alaykum wa Rahmatullahi
wabarakatuh.
And welcome to our weekly dose of virtues
of Islam lesson number 16
with our honorable Sheikh Sheikh Salim Al Amri.
Inshallah, we'll pass the mic and the screen
to the Sheikh, and the Sheikh will begin.
That Allah made us Muslims.
And this indeed
is one of the blessings. It's the one
the greatest blessing that Allah bestowed on us.
Assalam, my dear brothers and sisters,
as you know,
it is a way of life.
It addresses
all the issues
we as
humans,
mankind, face,
and comes with pragmatic
practical solutions.
And among the problems,
social problems
that are common
in communities
is the
spinsterhood,
women who are not married,
or men
spinsterhood or bachelorhood,
men who are not married.
This is
a problem,
needs to be resolved,
needs to be addressed.
And, normally,
the birth rate of the
females
is more than the birth rate of the
males
unless there is
an external factor
due to some cultural,
influencers
where they preferred the boys to the girls,
so they killed the girls
or abort them.
That's different issue.
But, normally,
the rate of the birth of rate
the rate of birth of females more than
the males.
So
how to resolve this issue? How to address
it?
Because
Allah embedded and built within
each one of us,
the inclination
towards the opposite *
and built within each of us the sexual
desire, the sexual drive,
which has to be
satisfied
and fulfilled
that desire
in the proper
way because that desire has to be
fulfilled.
If you don't fulfill this desire
in the halal,
lawful manner,
then
it will be fulfilled in the
improper way
and illicit to age.
You cannot suppress this
instinctive feeling.
It is something. It is an instinct. It
is something built within each one of us.
You cannot go against your own nature.
So
Allah
the one who created
us,
and he knows
our nature.
He legislated
and made it lawful
to get married
and to build
families
in the proper,
lawful
way.
Now
how about those women who are not married?
They have the right to get married.
If we have, let's say, 1,000,000
men
and 2,000,000 women,
and each man married 1 woman,
we'll be left with 1,000,000 surplus.
What to do with them?
They have the right
to live normal life,
not perverted one,
natural one,
to build family,
to become mothers.
So what is the solution
other beliefs provide?
Those who talk about Islam and say Islam,
permits
the polygamy and
okay. We ask them, what is the solution
you have?
Islam came with the solution.
We have
an existing
problem
beforehand
needs
resolution,
needs to be resolved and addressed.
What is the solution you have you don't
have?
Islam came with the solution.
Of course, before,
in the previous
laws,
Sharia,
it was permissible
to have more than one wife.
Islam limited it to the number maximum 4.
So polygamy,
my dear sisters,
because women are very sensitive. They are selfish
actually. Selfish.
If he is not married, he's one of
them. She said, yes. I agree. This is
the solution.
But if she's already married, she's selfish.
She doesn't care about her sisters,
and she doesn't want her husband to marry
another woman
who can
look after both of them, and he's able
physically and financially.
So Allah says, my dear brothers and sisters,
regarding this issue,
because now we have this surplus number,
either they should be they should get married
or they will be practicing
unlawful relationship,
and they will commit zina,
fornication,
adultery.
So
Allah says in Surat An Nisa,
aya number 3.
If you fear you might fail to give
often women their due rights
if you were to marry them,
then marry other women of your choice,
2, 3, or 4.
But if you are afraid you will fail
to maintain justice,
then content yourself
with 1
of with 1 or
those your right hand possesses. That means
this way it goes.
This way, you are less likely to commit
injustice.
Let us reflect here.
So this is the divine
solution.
This is the answer
to the problem.
Let's say that you are
taking care of orphans,
girls,
and you are the one who is taking
care of them, and you are the guardian.
And
now they grow up.
So
If you fear you might fail to give
often women their due
rights, if you marry them,
because
maybe the motive is to you marry this
orphan girl
for her own money.
So you want to
consume her money.
So Allah says,
if you fail,
you feel that you might fail to give
the orphan girls,
women, their if
you were to marry them,
then marry 3 women.
So we have slave girls,
orphans,
3 women, and slave girls.
Here, he's talking about free women,
not the overs,
neither the overs nor the slave girls. Then
marry other women of your choice.
You can marry. 2,
3, up to 4.
K.
Now
what is the ruling in the Sharia
regarding
marrying 1 wife?
When we say what is the ruling,
we want to know
which one of the 5 rulings.
Is marrying more than wife Haram?
Is marrying more than one wife Makru?
Is marrying more than one wife
or recommended
or permissible?
Halal.
The answer, it is.
It is.
It
is.
You can marry
up to 4 women.
More than 4, if you want to marry,
you have to divorce 1 of them.
K. You cannot have more than one form.
And you know that
a man
has to go through like a woman.
For example,
if he has 4 wives
and he divorced one of them, he cannot
get married immediately
because this fourth one who was the divorcee,
she's still his wife
when when she's still in the.
So if he matters another woman,
then he has 54 5 women 5 wives.
So he has to wait
until the waiting period,
Either 3 menstrual cycles or 3 months are
over.
He cannot immediately
divorce one of them and marry the other
one.
He cannot.
So if you fear that you will not
be just and
maintain justice.
And
here, the old women,
universally,
they just keep this.
1,
because you will not be able to be
just.
In other words, they're saying,
Allah said it's only 1 because we know
you. You will not be able to be
just
and treat us justly.
So the ayah says only 1.
Here, we tell our sister, try to understand.
Do you think Allah
tells the men, you're married
4 women or 2 women or 3?
That means he
permitted them and gave them the
permissibility,
the permission,
and he knows
that it is impossible for them to do
it.
When Allah
say, thank you
because he knows
it is possible
to treat them justly,
especially those who fear Allah.
So what does it mean?
This ayah,
what does it mean?
This talks about
the material,
the things, the benefits
to be just
with them regarding material
issues.
You buy this one
address, you buy address for the other one.
You buy a ring for this one, you
buy a ring for the other one.
For this one,
for the other one. This what you have
to
be just.
So if you know yourself, you will not
be
just
regarding the material issues
than
only 1.
The Quran has not spoken about your
heart,
your feelings,
the affinity
towards one more than the other. You love
this one more than the other.
I am not talking about that.
I have spoken about the things that you
can
treat them equally.
You treat them
equally regarding
material
issues, material
items,
matters.
The heart is not on your hand,
and naturally,
you might
love 1 than the other.
That's not on your hand, and the law
will not blame you for that or hold
you accountable
because that's what the prophet
said. He he treated all his wife
carefully,
but he said to Allah, oh, Allah, this
regarding what I can,
material
justice,
treating them equally, giving each one her days.
If I buy for this one, I buy
for the other.
That is okay. That is in my hand.
But don't blame me regarding what you own
and I don't own. You have it in
your hand. That's the heart.
That's why
he loves Aisha more than any other one.
It is known.
The.
It is known to everyone that he loves
Aisha.
Aisha is the most beloved
one among his wives to him.
The closest to his heart,
that is known.
And he was asked,
whom do you love most from among your
women, your wives? He said, Aisha.
They asked him about the men. He said
her father,
so it is clear.
So that's why the Sahaba,
if anyone wanted to give
a gift,
he would
wait
for the day of Aisha.
So when
the is with Aisha,
they he would give his gift
to the
But material
issues,
clothes,
accommodation,
provision,
food,
you treat them equally.
Hard days, you give each one hard day.
Not that you marry the young one now
and the
the mother of your children
who is advanced in age now
is neglected and ignored, and you don't visit
her. You don't
see them.
That's his.
That's why a person
who's not treating his wife equally
in matters of the
coming to bed and matters of
maintenance.
He will be
in the day of resurrection, he will be
come walking and coming,
and one of his sides is falling down,
drooping.
But your heart allow not blame you. And
this love
towards one more than the other,
that's not on your hand.
That's not on your hand. But this should
not
affect
you regarding
carrying out your obligations,
fulfilling the biological
needs of each one.
That's why the he would sleep with all
his wives in one night.
He would pass by all of them
and then spend the remaining part of the
night with the one
who
had they that
happened to be had they.
So you have to fulfill the biological
needs
of each one.
So don't misunderstand
this ayah.
It's not talking about the
the heart,
the love issue. No. Talks about something material.
You have to be just
and
teach them justly and equally. So if you
feel that you cannot do that, then
shift only to 1.
K? So
but if you are afraid, you will fail
to maintain justice, then content yourself with 1
or those your right hand possess it,
The,
as you know,
are swift goes.
Islam did not come
with slavery.
Slavery existed
before Islam.
So it is something
practiced.
Islam came with the solution
for
the abolition
and how to
end the issue of slavery,
and he came with the
practical solutions.
K. If you read your the scriptures,
whether the
Old Testament or the New Testament and
and other beliefs,
slaves are there.
K?
But Islam came with the solution.
Islam
looked into the issue
and blocked the inputs of slavery
because
people used to tribes attack each other
and take their women as slaves or their
men and boys and sell them as slaves
just like
that.
So Islam stopped that.
How about those slaves who are already there?
What to do about them?
So Islam
gave pragmatic,
practical solutions,
telling the masters,
first of all,
you have to be fair in treating them.
You don't overburden
them.
You don't
insult them.
You don't call them slaves.
They should teach eat the same food you
eat.
When they bring you the food, ask them
to sit down and eat with you, oh,
master,
or at least give them a morsel
from what you eat.
You clothe them as you clothe yourself,
then he's not a slave.
What slave is this? He's like his master.
His master should not,
overburden him,
should not
give call him straight, should teach him with,
fairly
and,
and he should eat from the same food,
wear clothes like his master.
When they saw Abdulav Nur Umar and his,
Nafir,
Nafir was a slave.
And when a slave is set free, he
is called.
And he
dresses. Right?
The same thing Abu
Ghafari.
When they saw him and the his,
young
slave boy like him. Say, what is it?
He said, this is what our taught
us.
Then Allah gave
the slaves a chance to set themselves
free,
and this is called mukataba,
to buy their own freedom.
So the slave works for his master,
and he agrees with his master
to pay certain amount,
and
he works to
to gain that amount of money and then
pays the money to his master, and he
becomes free.
And we,
as a community,
we help the slave
to get free.
So we help him and give him money
to set himself free.
That's why when,
Berila
Berila
came to
Aisha and had to ask for help.
Said, I agreed with my master,
so I need you to help me
so that I will become free.
I shall
say, I have no problem
to help
you. In one condition,
the Wallah should be for me. Wallah means
what?
The because now when you set a slave
free, he called,
which means when he dies,
the master will inherit him
will inherit him.
So Aisha said of the Allahu Anha, I
will set you free. I will pay the
money
on the
condition
that the wallah
if you die before me, I will inherit
you.
She went to her master, and they refused.
Said
no. If you die, the will for us,
we will inherit you.
So Aisha
informed the prophet
and the prophet told her, pay for the
amount of money and stipulate
that the wallah is for you. And then
he addressed the Muslim
and told them
when
he said.
So
the will be
for the one who sets the slave free,
helping the slaves to become free
by paying the ransom of the amount of
money.
So this is one of the ways
Islam
provided the techniques to so that a slave
will become free.
Also,
if a woman because now a man did
master who's who's free, and he's sleeping
with his slave girls,
like a wife
like a wife, and it is haram.
Now she conceives.
Now she becomes pregnant.
The moment she gives birth to a child,
she becomes free,
and this is called
called.
She becomes free because the child is
free.
The child is
free,
and she becomes free. So this is one
of the ways
Allah provided to so that the slave woman
will become free.
So this is how Islam addressed the issue
of slavery,
gave
solutions.
Also,
Islam
made the expiation
of many
sins
to set slaves free.
If someone sleeps with his wife during
day of Ramadan,
the explanation
to set a slave free,
if someone
took an oath
or swore by Allah not to do a
certain thing.
Then he realized he was mistaken.
The explanation
is to set a slave free,
etcetera.
So keep in mind now,
the slaves number of slaves is now
limited,
so no more
inputs,
and
Islam created many outlets,
ways to set them free.
So over a period of time,
all those slaves became free.
That's why today,
we don't find a slave.
So all this Hadith and the ayat set
to slave free
cannot be applied because there are no slaves
anymore.
So here,
Allah subhanahu alayhi said,
you men and women,
if you fear that you would not be
fair
to the often women,
that you will treat them
justly, or you might
consume
their wealth,
than marry other free women
up to 4.
If you are able financially
and physically,
2 things,
alba'a. This is called alba'a.
Alba'a means
money wise,
financially,
you can
provide
and take care of of this woman.
And second thing, physically you are able
to fulfill
her biological
needs.
If you have impotent,
you are not allowed to do that.
Yes. You are well off. You are rich,
but you cannot
fulfill her biological
needs.
And if you feel that you will not
be just materially
and treat to treat your woman equally regarding
material matters issues,
than only 1
or
your slave girls, but your right hand
possesses.
Some ignorant Muslims,
nowadays,
they consider
they think that the housemaids
are slave girls
or what your right hand possess. No. That's
not true.
If you
have a relationship with the housemaid, then it
is.
Then Allah said,
This way, you are less likely to commit
injustice to commit injustice.
Also, Allah said
in Surat An Nur
Surat An Nur, which the
scholars
used to say in the salaf,
teach your family Surat al Nur.
So Allah says in Surat al Nur, ayah
32.
So the ayah number 3 is Surat Al
Nisa, as we know, that Allah
gave the solution that men who are
physically able and financially able to marry women.
Well, then
what wife? Up to 4.
What's the problem?
There is a problem in the community,
and you can help and solve it.
So my dear sisters, keep your feelings and
emotions away. Think.
Sheikh Sam,
please unmute your mic.
So many sisters, may Allah guide them.
They don't mind
their
husbands
commit.
It's okay to them,
and they know that their husbands are committing.
They know
that.
She knows her husband is committing haram. He
doesn't mind.
But the moment her husband thinks to
have
fulfill his desire and the halal and build
another family
and another home,
Most of the sister
are against
it,
and they are ready to ask for divorce.
They don't know
that this is not an
excuse to ask for,
and she is sinful if she asks for.
And a woman who ask her husband for
with no valid reason, and this is not
a valid reason,
she will not smell the fakeness of the
agenda.
So keep this in mind, my dear sisters.
That's not your right.
If you marry another woman,
then divorce me.
So the hadith is clear.
She will not smell the fragrance of the
jannah.
So in Surat al Noor,
Allah says, I 32.
And marry the unmarried among you. Those who
are not married, the demerit.
And the righteous among your male slaves and
female slaves, the demerit.
If they should be poor,
Allah will avech them from his bounty,
and Allah is all encompassing
and knowing.
So this how Islam
provides
the solution
and encourages
encourages here the community.
So he is addressing other Muslim
and encouraging them.
So married, the unmarried,
the young one,
those who are not married, get them married.
Islam
instructs us to facilitate
and make the marriage easy
for the young one.
So that they will have pious righteous life.
Something happened to the Muslims.
We have been enslaved
intellectually
that a boy
cannot get mad at until he finishes his
degree,
university.
So he will fit graduate
at the age
of maybe 24.
The same thing for the girl.
So the marriage is delayed,
and the delay of the marriage will have
dreadful consequences.
The girl might commit harm,
especially when there is free mixing, and she's
going through co ed co education.
The same thing,
the boys.
What is the problem if you are well
off as a family?
You got your children married
when they are yeah. What's the problem?
He's just studying. Let him study.
What's the problem?
He will focus more on his study when
he's married.
There's nothing there to distract his
concentration.
The same thing for the girls.
During the reign of Sayidina Umar ibn Abdul
Aziz,
because during his reign,
Barakah,
everything is blessed.
So much so that the collector
could not find
receivers,
could not find anyone to accept it.
So they wrote to him.
No one is ready to accept the zakar.
He said, okay.
Call with those who are not married
and get them married.
They did, and they amount to money is
still there.
They wrote to him,
said we got those who are not married,
married,
but still there is
surplus amount of money.
He said buy slaves and set them free.
They did,
and they wrote.
Still,
you say buy food for the birds and
the animal
and
put it
in the in the places where the the
birds will
normally
go.
Places where you feel there are birds there,
buy seeds and throw the seeds for the
birds.
So this is our Islam.
So Allah is commanding
us to get those who are not married,
married.
And today,
this is the problem facing the Muslim youth,
male
and females,
boys and girls.
And, unfortunately,
many
Muslim families,
They don't mind
their sons to commit They
know.
Say he's a man. Okay. He's a man
To commit to Zina.
Halal? No.
Finish your degree.
Zina, go.
And married and married among you,
And married, get them married.
And the among your male slaves and female
slaves, get them married.
And if they are poor, Allah will provide
for them.
If they should be poor, Allah will enrich
them from his bounty.
And
Allah is all encompassing
and knowing.
And in the hadith,
which is an Nasai,
authentic hadith,
reported by Abdullah ibn Mas'ud
Well, not let me I did for Alihibosaun.
It was narrated that Abdullah
said,
the messenger of Allah said,
whoever among you can afford
to get married, let him do so.
And whoever cannot afford it
should fast,
for it will be a restraint
for him.
So here,
the
in another narration, he addresses the youth.
Because this is natural.
They have to get married.
That sexual
urge,
desire
needs to be satshined.
And do you know what the shaitan does?
Either through shubuhat,
doubts,
or shahawat,
desires and
lusts.
So the matter helps the someone
to get rid of the desire.
That's why when you get married,
you completed
half of your deed, half of it.
So here,
the pafsa
salam is encouraging
the
Muslim youth to that matter.
And we have to facilitate
it and make it easy
not to
make the weddings
very extravagant,
cost a lot of money. No.
Very simple.
The wedding is very simple.
Few people
you invite.
K.
And he announced the that they got married
and finished.
Why should
we
complicate
it?
So here,
So he's addressing the youth.
Whoever among you can afford to get married,
let him do so. Do not delay
do not delay the marriage
and especially the girls
because you don't have chance.
You are limited.
The average, 40 when you reach 40,
you vanapose.
Finish.
You'll not have children.
Because from
the age of 15 or maybe less than
that, 14, 13, 12, it depends on the
where you live and hot countries and the
climate, and some girls, they get their periods
very early,
maybe 9 sometimes.
So every month, you lose one egg.
The ovary
releases
1 oven, 1 egg.
And since you are not married, so there's
no fertilization,
there's no sperm will come
to fertilize that egg.
The egg will wait for a period of
time, then it dies, then
it comes out in the form of blood
because the uterine wall of the uterus
also collapses and comes out in form of
menses.
So every month, you lose one egg till
the ovary becomes depleted,
empty. Nothing is there.
Finished.
No chance
to have children.
No chance.
So that's why
you get your
daughters married
as soon as possible.
Do not delay delay the marriage. Or sometimes
the girl herself says, no. No. I'm not
thinking about marriage now.
I want
to finish my degree.
Okay.
Then
manic? No. I have to get a job.
I have to secure
get a career,
and then I have to establish myself. Okay.
And the clock is ticking,
and the years are passing,
and you don't feel this.
And then
and old.
No one is interested
now
to marry me.
Yeah?
Name yourself.
Nobody
else.
Will the career now help you? This
degree will help you now?
Don't you want to have a baby in
your hand to feel as a mother?
You missed the chance.
You're the one who should be blamed.
K?
So
whoever among you
can afford to get married, let him do
so.
Whoever cannot
afford it,
should fast, the prophet. This is how
he
gave the option and the alternative to the
youth. You can't
that matter
fast because fasting
but it will be a restrained
for
him.
Literally, it means
frustration.
So the fasting
will diminish the sexual
urge,
the desire.
So you keep fasting Monday, Thursday,
and do exercise
and avoid,
taking food that will
give you energy like seafood and stuff like
that and stop and stop watching anything
that will trigger your desire or read anything
that will trigger your desire.
Lower your gaze.
Okay. Build your
iman. Work on your heart.
Increase your
until Allah
creates for you
a way and facilitates for you and makes
it easy to get married. May Allah get
all the Muslim youth married.
And
here, the prophet
he told the youth
to start practice
to
practice fasting.
Nothing else.
He didn't tell them you can't masturbate
because * is Haram.
* is Haram.
So he told them,
fast. The fasting is the
prophetic description
for the youth.
Another narration.
So reported Allah's messenger saying,
marry women who are loving and very prolific,
for I shall outnumber
the peoples, the nations, by you.
So this is the wish of the prophet
He's telling us,
get married
and have many children
have many children. This is my wish
because I want my
number, the other nations on the day of
resurrection. I want you to
to have the the highest number
on that day.
So
that's why he said,
Those women
who
have,
of, love and nature,
and wadud,
very prolific. She will give you many children.
How do I know that?
She's a girl.
They say we look at her mother,
her sisters,
because
heredity
plays vital role here.
So, normally, she will be like them.
But if her mother, she
gave only one child
and her sister the same, then she is
not going to be prolific.
K?
So you marry those women who will give
you more children
because
we don't have birth control in Islam. It's
a birth control is haram.
Birth control in the sense that
you limit
the
number of children. Said, okay. One boy and
one girl, and that's it.
So it's the cost of living. That was
haram.
It's not allowed in Islam, and it goes
against this hadith.
Because you are the as a father, you
are not the the. You are not the
provider. The one who provide is Allah.
You are only a tool.
So
the issue
of provision and sustenance,
a Muslim should not worry about it. It
is in Allah's hand.
So we should not kill our children
out of
fear of profit.
So birth control is not allowed
at all.
Yes.
You can
keep gaps within one child and another child,
and that is what Allah gave himself,
2 years, the period of breastfeeding.
But to decide not to have children anymore,
that's not allowed.
That's why I hear the prophet
say, marry those women who will give you
more children.
Prolific.
This is the wish of the prophet.
So the
prophet has this wish,
and he wants each one of us to
fulfill his wish.
I want to say, this is my.
See,
we are the greatest.
The greatest
number is my.
But if every Muslim says
no,
I want only 1 boy and 1 girl,
and and and that is enough,
then how you are going to fulfill the
wish
of your prophet?
Or if the
the wife herself says the woman says,
I cannot
go through this
pregnancy
more than
twice. That's it.
So I'm going to
close the fallopian tubes
and get sterilized.
That's not permissible in Islam.
That's not I don't know. That's.
This the life of the mother is at
risk.
K.
At risk
that she went through many caesareans.
All
the children she gave through caesarean
operations.
Then
Muslim doctor says,
so if you get pregnant, then
your life will be at stake.
Apart from that,
you cannot stop
having children,
But this is the wish of the and
the Sahaba understood that,
and this was the practice of the Muslims.
That's about history.
And this is,
alhamdulillah,
the Muslim ummah is the number is increasing,
hamdullilah.
And the kuffar, their number is
reducing
because they don't have children,
and they don't get married. They just keep
practicing
and
committing because
is
available everywhere,
and the relationships
are not,
local relationships.
And they are
they don't want responsibilities,
so they don't have children.
And they see the Muslim number, Muslim,
the
birth rate Muslims,
the number
is
increasing, and that scares them.
May Allah
bless our Ummah,
and may Allah
keep us remain steadfast in this beautiful deen,
and may Allah
forgive us our faults and mistakes and ignorance.
And may Allah
unite
our and may Allah unite our hearts and
and
may Allah grant us the beneficial knowledge
and the righteous needs.
And may Allah reward all of you, my
dear brothers and sisters,
immensely
for your patience and attendance.
Brothers and sisters, we will now begin the
question and answers time.
If you have not sent your questions already,
please do so. You can do it by
sending in
written questions
on the chat section or
as we prefer, raise your hand
and ask the questions
directly.
Okay.
We have received some questions already. We will
begin with those.
It's the first question.
Assalamu alaykum. May Allah reward you Sheikh for
this wonderful class.
A man brings in second wife when he
knows that the first wife is patient with
his income and assisting in the home upkeep.
After the marriage,
he now cannot longer afford even the little
he usually
could afford
for the family
because it now has to be divided.
Is this permissible?
You see, the
the hadith is very clear.
K.
And this means
financially, you are able to open more one
than one house
to look after the second wife and third
wife and the fourth wife.
If you cannot afford that, then only one.
It's not that you say,
I am a macho man. You know?
K?
I am
I can
look after them,
But, financially, I don't have
money. Sorry.
Because you have to take care of them.
And that's why
the the prophet
told the woman who
who,
came to him and said,
3 of your companions
proposed to me,
Abu Jahan and Usama.
He told them
is very poor. He doesn't have anything.
So he will not be able to look
after you. That
was his
at that time, that was his status,
and later on, he became the Khalifa of
the Muslims.
And
the,
he beats the woman.
Clearly, the habit says
because one narration says,
that means always the the stick on his
shoulder.
And this is,
an,
allegory.
Someone is having the stick on his shoulder.
It can mean
figuratively,
he's a traveler, always traveling,
and the Arabs, when one is traveling, always
have a stick that,
carry a stick on his shoulder,
or he beats women.
Then the other narration explains this and said,
he
beats women,
so don't marry him.
Marry Usama.
So the prophet
made it very clear
that you have to take care of your
family.
Now he got married,
So
family is there. 2 wives are there. So
may Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala with barakah and
the income,
and may Allah
provide to him
and increase his income. I mean,
but
anyone who has this in mind, first of
all,
make sure that you
are able financially
to look after more than one wife.
Is this clear to the question?
Shala, it is clear, Sheikh. If not the
question, I can send in another question.
Follow-up.
The next question. A person took money from
a non Muslim government
from their COVID relief plan
without really qualifying for it, but now feels
bad.
She is
asking
Allah's forgiveness, but asking what she should do
with the money.
How did she take, he or she took,
take this money? How did
Sheikhad, in terms of,
how in terms of cash or bank or
is that what you're asking, Sheikha? No. No.
No. No. The I mean, yeah,
he or It will be
noun. False representations
on, forms.
So okay. Forgery?
Forgery.
Okay. That's ham. So
now
if there's a way to return it,
that's well and fine.
If not, then you this has to be
given to,
charity organizations,
and you repent to Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala. It is haram.
Enerspective whether
this money,
belongs to a Muslim or a non Muslim.
This is a form of stealing.
It's theft.
Is this clear to the question?
We go to the next question.
My parents have done a lot of things
for me, alhamdulillah.
However, they scolded me and mock my jokes,
which makes me serious at home.
At school, I am happy, and I get
along well.
I started to love my teachers and thus
become lively there.
However, this makes me remember Allah
less at school compared to home.
Is this hypocrisy?
So at home,
the atmosphere is not helping her. Her family,
they
they,
mock her, and, she feels bad about that.
Yes. Sheikh
parents mock
him, his jokes,
and they scold him too.
Anyway, you see,
whatever the parents
do of course, it's just wrong, no doubt,
and it might affect the child, but try
to not take things into heart
when whatever your parents say. Just this is
my advice for you. Just ignore
what they are saying as you haven't
heard anything.
Okay?
And ask Allah
to guide them.
And at the same time, parents should
fear Allah
because
we might ruin and
destroy
our children without knowing,
k, without knowing sometimes
because we
mimic and emulate the way of upbringing
that was given to us.
That's
how our parents
protest. Absa, now we want to
replicate and do the same thing. No.
No.
Because you are going to
harm your children.
Okay?
So my advice for you, just ignore what
they are saying.
Pray for them. Strengthen your relationship with your
Lord,
your adkar, your prayers, your,
connection with the book of Allah
And the same thing at school.
You should not be
when you are at school, you feel relaxed
and you ignored your religious commitments.
Okay?
And you become less practicing
when you are,
outside
your home.
Should not have this
duality in your,
personality, dual personality.
K.
So at home, what you do at home,
you do outside.
So you
because Allah, the one you worship, he's seeing
you wherever you are.
So we
you fear Allah wherever you are.
So you practice your deen wherever you are
to the best of your ability. May Allah
strengthen your iman, and may Allah guide your
parents, and may Allah
make you overcome
what you are going through.
Ameen.
It is clear to the questioner.
I mean,
we go to the next question.
What if the eligible
men in the local area have wrong?
What should a woman do?
If he has wrong,
don't marry him.
Don't marry
him irrespective of how desperate you are.
Don't marry someone who has
long belief,
who believes in
tomb worship, saints worship, stuff like that.
K.
So just practicing shift,
don't marry him
because he's going to
influence you.
And my advice for all the sisters,
get up at night.
Get up at night in the last 3rd
of the night and pour down out your
heart and cry to Allah.
May Allah
grant you
pious husbands, oh my dear sisters, those who
are not married
sooner,
those who will help you to reach the
akhira,
pious ones.
Ameen.
So
Allah,
everything is in the hand of Allah
Keep crying to him.
Meanwhile,
keep fasting.
May Allah help all
the brothers and sisters
to get married,
Amin.
Next.
I mean, the next question,
Are we encouraged
to marry from amongst our own nation?
I'm looking for a spouse for my daughter,
and the prospective
spouse comes from mixed heritage.
His father,
African and mother, Pakistani.
My husband said it is best to find
somebody who is from an Indian background so
that our daughter can be closer to her
culture.
A prospective boy is religious and from a
good family.
Therefore,
I do not
do I not consider him because of my
husband's preference?
No. The hadith is clear.
So when the one who proposes you are
satisfied with his religious commitment
and his manner and his character.
So these two qualities
are fulfilled
conditions.
We should not turn him away.
Should not.
Otherwise, the prophet
said, it will cause it will cause a
widespread corruption.
So
the
culture,
we have to keep it aside.
Yes.
As preference,
if someone
from the same
area,
the
same culture,
There will be more compatibility,
and he
the and,
that's what I'm fine.
But you don't disqualify
this,
brother because
he's not from the same area
or doesn't belong to the same culture.
K? You don't reject him just like that
because of that reason. It's not a valid
reason.
And
many parents
who think along this line,
they keep just
rejecting, rejecting.
And the years they pass and the girl
is growing,
and then
it's too late. Now they want anyone to
come. No one is interested.
So, please,
when you have pious
suitor, someone who's very pious, righteous,
and
has a and he can look after, and
you did your homework.
You asked about the boy,
then don't reject this boy.
This is my advice for you.
Is this clear to the question now?
Otherwise, alternatively, they can send in another question.
The next question.
Assalamu alaikum, Sheikh. My question is,
there is a new sect which was started
some years ago in South India.
Nowadays, it's getting popular. Many of my friends
also follow this sect.
They follow the Quran and the sunnah, but
they follow the Islamic
calendar of Saudi Arabia.
They start fasting one
day before they
celebrate
Eid a day before.
They do sacrifice
a day before.
Is it acceptable
how to give them dua?
To give them dua? They are Muslim.
What is this funny question, really?
And you call them
sects because they follow a calendar of Saudi
Arabia?
Or because they make a Eid, they follow
their Eid when that Eid is announced in
Mecca?
So it's a huge issue.
Yes. It is preferable you follow the mainstream
when it comes to their Eid and stuff
like that,
but this will not make them sick.
And you consider them deviant,
and now you're asking,
can you give them?
K?
So my dear questioner,
cool down and try to learn your deed.
K?
And not label Muslims
because of
these certain issues.
Okay?
They announce the Eid
of Ramadan tomorrow,
So they followed
the announcement. Many Muslim countries, they have their
Eid on that day
or the day of Adavah.
People you can see them on the mount
of Adavat.
So that's the day of Adavah,
and you don't want to fast that day.
To you, the day every day is the
day of Arafat as if you have your
own Arafat
where you live.
See, this issue
in the past,
100 years back,
when there was no communication,
yes,
can be understood.
People are following and seeing the
the the follow the calendar, the moon,
and that's how they count the days.
But today, you see everything in front of
you before your eyes.
That's
why
they even one Muslim country
sighted the moon,
all Muslim countries should follow.
That's it. Especially,
when all these countries,
they have
one common night and one common day. That
means they share the same night and the
same day. It is now night. It is
night there. It is night everywhere,
and the country saw the moon.
But because, you know, the political systems
and regimes,
they don't follow each other.
But Islamically,
if one Muslim condition, it's enough.
Is this clear to the questioner?
Shala, it is clear. Sheikh, next question.
What advice can you give to a Muslim
who gets frequent waswas
about the jinn and monsters,
getting harmed by them?
Does this make the person
a?
No. No. No.
See, my dear,
brothers and sisters,
Avoid using these words,
for small matters issues.
So this is a.
So why it would how to make a
person a kafir?
It is shaitan who whispers into one's ears.
The remedy is to turn to Allah,
to read.
The adkar,
you maintain you will do
the istighfar,
praying to Allah,
and Allah
will
cure you from such wish was.
If it is so severe became OCD,
then you can't seek also medical
help
besides the
spiritual cure,
your alcary,
your,
etcetera.
But it has nothing to do with or
and stuff like that.
So may Allah
grant you
quick cure
and remedy
and recovery from this.
Strengthen your relationship with your lord.
Maintain
your. Maintain
the. Always maintain your.
Read the book of Allah
and Allah is the protector,
and Allah is the healer.
When they fall sick, he is the one
who heals me.
Hold to the robe of Allah.
Strengthen
your attachment and your connection
with your creator,
And
you'll be able to overcome
what you're going through. May Allah
strengthen your iman
and grant you
a recovery from what you
experienced.
Amen.
Next. Amen.
Next question.
I have 2 questions.
Number 1,
a brother is married but is not able
to fulfill his marital,
conjugal
relationship.
Does the sister have the right for divorce?
First question.
Yeah.
If the,
this,
problem
happened
recently,
and there is a reason behind it. So
as you see, sometimes,
if the relationship
is sour
between the 2,
then
the man will not have that ability,
and it might affect him.
Or
if
he is not taking care of how looks
and
so there are certain things that put him
off.
This also will affect a man.
So this
weakness
can be
treated
can be,
fixed
either
through medical treatment
to see a doctor
or taking certain
food
that help.
And if after all
attempts,
he tried
and he cannot
fulfill
the biological
needs
of his,
partner,
and
she feels
she will fall into harm,
Then it is to
ask for,
but that is the last thing to think
of.
And
the how they discuss
how many times,
a man just sleep with his wife.
K.
Some they say it once a month.
If he does that,
he did his part
because Allah said
So when they are clean, approach them
in the place that Allah
allowed you
and mentioned to you.
So they said the minimum once
or once a week.
So if he does that,
then
there's no need to ask for a follow-up.
There's no need to ask for.
But if, for example, he now got married
to another one, so the first one is
totally
neglected.
So when he comes to her,
he sleeps,
and he doesn't fulfill her biological needs.
And
she's ready for the and she will bear
the consequences
and she will not
regret later on, that's alright.
But first of all, my advice
is to help your husband
to overcome this problem.
Sometimes it is something
psychological.
It's fine.
Sometimes it could maybe due to second
or due to
2. Sometimes it is the second is done.
So help your husband
to overcome this problem. May Allah
make your
marital relationship
happy
and strong, I mean.
Next.
The second question from the same person.
Is hairdressing
as a profession
permissible?
Would someone be sinning if they gift someone's
styling equipment knowing
that sometimes
she styles people who are uncovered?
If she is working as
has she has her own salon
and she is a beautician,
if she's doing it to the Muslim
women
who will cover and they are doing
that they
come to her,
and ask her to do their hair for
their husband, that's fine.
But if you know someone, she is
she's not practicing.
And you know she is just coming
and to do her hair so that she
will be fitna,
goes more fitna
and attract men
more. In this case, don't.
Don't do that
because you you should not cooperate regarding
Munkal
and causing
helping someone
to cause more damage to the community
and spread
corruption, moral corruption in the community, which should
not help them.
I hope this is clear to your to
the questioner.
Sure. Light is clear, Shay.
The next question, Sheikh.
A husband insisted that he has to merge
the first and second wife together in the
same house, and one of the wives refused.
Is she sinful for not obeying the husband
in this situation?
If the house
is vast enough,
spacious,
so that
it will accommodate
both of them.
She should not.
But if it is already congested,
and on top of that, they have to
share the same bedroom,
for example,
Then that's his highlight.
You should tell him. No.
You see the house.
K?
And now you want to bring her on
top of me.
Where are you going to put her?
K. So men,
they have to understand this to the brothers.
K?
They have to understand.
Why you put yourself in such trouble, in
such problem when you are not ready for
it?
K. Having a second life is not a
joke.
It's a headache.
It's a headache.
And the brothers say that this sunnah,
this I'll listen to, you know,
It is sunnah and commitment and obligation.
Obligation.
So woman has have rights. She have her
own house.
K?
So if this
home is
spacious,
can accommodate, fuck. That's what I'm fine.
When you know that
he cannot,
for the time being,
can cooperate,
and Allah will reward you for your patience.
May Allah reward you, and may Allah
guide all of you. Ameen.
Next.
Next question, Sheikh. I'm asking about Tayamun.
What comes first, the hands or the face?
You strike your the the the earth with
your hand like this,
then you wipe your face.
Of course, you when you when you strike
your hands, then like this, you wipe your
face, and it the same the same
the same,
strike for both hands. The same.
It's up to here, up to the rest,
the same. So like this, I work the
face and like this.
There is another narration, 2, 1 for the
face and 2 for the hands and the
whole, but it is a weak narration.
Is this clear?
Next question.
How should a Muslim deal with an abusive
wife?
What do you mean abusive wife? He
has bad tongue,
uses
slang. She swears and stuff like that. What
Yeah.
I believe that's what they they mean.
Okay.
Sabolun, Jenny,
if you want
to to stay with her.
Just stuff your ears with cotton
and ignore what you're saying
and work
try to improve her character.
If you have children and you
don't want to
to destroy your family and
make the children to suffer,
So
have and pray for her and ask Allah
to guide her, and she has to fear
Allah
because a
Muslim, the prophet said,
a Muslim
So a Muslim is not the one who
curses, the one who it's not the one
who swears.
They're not the one who
insults.
I'm not the one who use bad language.
Vulgar
toes. That's not the character of the Muslim.
May Allah guide her, and may Allah grant
you
beautiful patience, Amin.
Next.
Next question, Sheikh.
A brother gets married before consuming the marriage.
He marries a second wife.
Is this valid?
Again. Again?
A brother gets married.
Okay. And before consuming the marriage, he marries
another wife.
Is that valid?
So he married a woman,
and before the consummation,
he married another one?
Yeah.
Okay. It is valid.
It is
valid providing that they are not, more than
4.
Okay. Let's say that he married this woman
and the consummation
hasn't happened. So she's still she's
his wife
because the wedlock is fine,
and then he married a second one.
So now he has 2 wives.
Yeah. The consummation with the first one hasn't
happened, but she is his wife.
So their marriage is valid. Yes?
Is this clear to the question?
Our light is clear, Sheikh. We go to
the next question.
I know a salesperson who received an order
of a particular product he doesn't possess.
The customer discusses the price and delivery period.
He confirms them. Is that permissible?
You don't sell something you don't have.
You cannot sell
it, and you cannot
take the price in advance.
But if
he this the the client say,
I want this product,
so import it, and I'm going to buy
it. So this is a promise.
He has to maintain it.
And you order,
then now you have the item. Now you
can sell, but you cannot sell it before
you possess it and you before you having
it. You cannot.
You can order it,
and the the buyer committed
that I'm going to,
to buy it,
and now you inform him the item arrived.
K.
Or if he paid something as what you
call
down payment,
K.
And then he decides not to take the
project.
Should you return this money to him or
not?
If you return it, that's,
well, I'm fine.
And if you take it because
you,
the order of this project
cost you this amount of money,
or for example,
he comes to you and says,
I want this project. Just, keep it aside
and don't sell it.
And this is,
advanced payment.
And then later on, after 2 weeks, after
1 month, 2 months, 3 months,
and that
commodity
is allocated for him,
and
then he comes and say, I don't want.
Then you have the right to take that
money because
that commodity could be you could have sold
it,
and he stopped you from doing that.
Is this clear to the questioner?
But selling an item,
because this what many people do,
say, yes. Yes. Come tomorrow. I'll give it
to you, and now,
give me the the
the the amount of money, the price. So
you sell something you don't have.
That's not permissible.
Is this clear to the question or?
Shall I let this clear share? We go
to the next question.
A group of people gather their money every
month, and each month, one of the members
takes that total amount gathered.
Is that permissible?
No. It's not permissible.
It's not permissible.
But this is and this is they do
it and goes on and on.
So the first one,
he benefits. The last one, he didn't benefit
because he would just get what he he
paid. But the first one, he
He got this
amount
chunk of money, and he made business with
it, etcetera.
And if someone dies,
what will happen if someone failed
to pay, etcetera?
So
the
will say, it's not
permissible.
Next.
And you find this common among teachers and
employees and
people have limited income.
Next.
Next question.
Dear Sheikh, Allah bless you and make you
and all of us people.
What about
if a wife is not ready to fulfill
the biological
needs between her and her husband for 2
years
and there is children going to the madras
or learning the deen, and for that case,
the husband decides
not to
divorce, but decides to stay away from her.
Is this right or wrong?
So she she refuses to come to bed?
The question has written,
is not ready to fulfill the biological
needs.
K.
This is from her side. Right?
From her side.
Okay. Is this due to endless sickness?
She is sick.
Okay. I'm giving different reason.
If it is due to an illness, due
to sickness,
okay,
and
you can't tolerate
and you feel that you are okay,
that is your right.
But if you now feel that this is
going to affect you and you might fall
into the Haram,
yes, you can leave her
as a wife
and marry another woman
if you want to do that.
So
this is the question?
He's asking, can he marry another woman?
I think he's just asking your opinion if
he
does not divorce and just stays away from
her. Is that okay?
Yeah. Okay. It is okay because it the
problem comes from her side. I if it
is there is no valid reason,
okay,
then this is called in the the
Islamic,
terminology
rebellious.
He doesn't want to come to bed.
She's sinful.
She is sinful.
So the sin on her side.
Now regarding you, it's you know yourself.
You know yourself. If this is affecting you
and you can't afford marrying another wife and
you want to do so, it is halal
for you, and it is permissible.
If you want to tolerate and be become
and remain patient,
that is
up to you.
That's up to you.
You're not sinful
by just ignoring her and,
because you you have family, you have children,
you don't want to
to
end this marital relationship, though it is nominal
relationship. It's not real relationship,
but
that is
your right, and you will have to decide
if you want to carry on. You are
not sinful.
May Allah give you
and patience
to control
your desires.
Next.
Next question, Sheikh.
Sheikh, one of my righteous friends is facing
tests one after another.
Within 1 month, he lost his job,
and his health is badly affected.
And I came to know today that suddenly
he's unable to open his right eye.
He is heartbroken, but same time, very patient
and in consultation with doctors for treatment.
Sheikh, may I request you to please make
dua for him, and also if you can
please guide him with the dua which invokes
Allah's mercy on him.
May Allah
grant him a quick recovery, Ameen, and may
Allah
make it easy, make this test easy for
him, and Allah
only test those whom he loves.
So my advice for this father to just
remain
patient
and ask Allah
the and
asking
Allah to make it easy on him and
to ease it.
May Allah
grant him a quick
recovery and.
Amin.
Okay. Next question, Sheikh. Sheikh, my question is,
sometimes we see death people in our dreams.
Is that does that mean they really come
in our dream, or is it because of
Shaikhan?
The prophet
he told us
the 2 types of dreams, bad dreams and
good dreams. If you see a good dream,
it is from Allah.
K?
And you can
relate it to whom you love or relate
it to someone who can
explain it
or interpret the this dream for you. If
it is bad dream, you spit on your
left side, and you forget about it. That's
it.
And you your life should not be run
by dreams,
so the dream should not affect you at
all. If it is bad dream, you spit
and that's it,
and nothing will
harm you.
Next. Yeah. That was our final question for
tonight, JazakAllah Khair, if you'd like to conclude.
My dear brothers and sisters for your patience
and attendance.
May Allah bless you, bless your family. May
Allah
make all of you,
make all your marital lives happy and successful,
and may
Allah elevate your status in this world and
in
And may Allah
give us a remain
steadfast in this beautiful deen till we meet
him, and he is pleased with all of
us.
Until we meet
in the coming session,
I leave you in Allah's company and protection.