Safi Khan – Soul Food Understanding Death
AI: Summary ©
The conversation discusses the importance of death and how it impacts relationships and communities. It also touches on the difficulty of traveling with loved ones and the importance of grieving during overwhelming emotions. The host discusses the use of "immediate" in Arabic to mean something that is not safe, and the importance of traveling together for women who are traveling alone.
AI: Summary ©
Okay, sha Allah let's go ahead and begin Smilla will hamdulillah a
salatu salam ala Rasulillah while early he was Herbie he edge marine
Salam aleykum Rahmatullah everybody and that Allah Welcome
Home Welcome back to roots.
We are in sha Allah going to be sharing some conversation, some
heavy conversation tonight about a certain topic that's not always
easy to talk about.
It's usually very personal for a lot of people. But under the law
as Muslims, we don't shy away from the things that are hard to talk
about. In fact, we embrace them with dignity and etiquette humbly
law as our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to teach us.
So hamdulillah our conversation tonight is going to revolve around
the concept of remembering the ultimate truth of life, which is
the reality of death, right? The reality of mortality. And again,
you know, this is something that Subhanallah it flees so many
people's thoughts, just merely due to the fact that hamdulillah Allah
Tada has given a lot of people in here, you know, healthy, vibrant
young lives. And because of that, the human being tends to sometimes
neglect a lot of reality that you know, is very much you know, true
for our lives if you just look at it from like an others
perspective. But when you look at it through your own lens and
through your own eyes, it almost seems like such a far off concept.
And so there's going to be a lot of insha Allah a lot of
interaction, there's going to be some hypothetical questions and
some you know, what if sir, what would be if you were to approach a
certain situation, and it's inshallah going to get everyone's
kind of, you know, brain working a little bit today to think about
certain things that maybe on a daily basis, we really don't think
about, but in fact, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in his
sunnah, used to advise people to remember death often, right?
Remember death often because if a person does so, they will make
decisions more clearly. They will do things more uprightly, if you
will, right. They will do things with more clear thought and
honesty and sincerity. And so inshallah we're going to open up
that conversation today. So the first thing that I want everyone
to think about, okay, is the thought of death in the first
place. Okay. So the question on the screen, it reads, have you
ever thought about the concept of death? And how does it make you
feel, right?
It should elicit some sort of emotion from a person, you know,
to think about death. And we'll go through some of these narrations
because the scholars and the RMR, they share a lot of insight as to
how death made them feel. We'll talk about it today. Literally,
there are some Sahabi that used to actually wake up in the middle of
the night crying, because they just dreamt about death. Right? I
had conversations with some people today, here in this space about
well, how they feel about death. I was doing like a little bit of
like, kind of field research experience before class tonight,
you know, how do people conceptualize death themselves?
So, in sha Allah, what I'm going to do is I'm going to open up the
floor for everyone today really quickly in sha Allah. Have you
ever thought about the concept of death? And how does it make you
feel anybody want to start us off and share in sha Allah? How does
the thought of death make you feel? And we're going to look for
some variety of answers tonight Inshallah, because I think
there'll be a lot of differences of answers here. Go ahead.
Absolutely. It's like a scary thought. And what is like, what
did what asked like, how does it make you feel? I think for me,
personally, it's like, okay, If death comes to me, it's like, it's
like a meat journey that's going to happen after life, right? But
what scares me more is like, being in this dunya still and losing the
people around me or somebody that I still love and like, and having
to
de morte de mer mentioned something very wise, by the way,
because death is not something that just impacts the individual.
It impacts community. Right. And there are going to be some tear
jerking narrations I'm gonna share with you guys tonight. I was
reading it like four days ago and I was just like crying in my
office like just like lonely person. But but you guys will see
why because what Taymor said was powerful. He said that death not
only affects the person who is undergoing it, but then there's
that kind of perspective of the people around them, right? Almost
that imagery of you know, your loved ones surrounding your death,
but upon that time in which Allah calls your name, and how they feel
right, very, very good. Anyone else want to share? How does the
concept of death make you feel? Yeah?
Yeah, like you can all you almost can never be fully ready for it.
Right? Like, if you were given another minute, you would still
benefit from it. There's never a time where like, you're thinking
to yourself, yes. 100%. I'm done. Right? Because we'll talk about it
again. Right? At any any second any minute. Extended right? In
your Agile is something that's beneficial. Right? In sha Allah.
Okay, good. Anyone else? Yes?
Yeah, yeah, it's weird, right? Because in Islam, you know that
there's like that kind of knowledge that is seen, right. But
there's also an animal rave right now is that unseen, death almost
falls in the middle of those two concepts. You guys agree with
that? That death is knowledge of the scene, because you quite
literally have seen people go through it in your life. But at
the same time, you will never know what it feels like until you taste
it yourself. Right? So it's seen and unseen, which again, right?
The fear of the unknown is a big stimulus for people, right? How
many people in here and just think, well, you didn't raise your
hand. But just think about this internally. How many people in
here have fears have things that they're not familiar with, right?
A new job, possibly a new career, a new place, that you've never
visited a new group of friends, a new, you know, a new person that
you're about to meet? There's that kind of fear? Like, what if this
happens? Or what if that takes place? Or what if I don't do well,
all these? What if questions come up? And the reality the scary
thing about death is that by the time you ask those questions, what
if or what if that or when this, it may already be time and you and
that's why, by the way, SubhanAllah? You know, there's a
famous Hadith of the Prophet SAW somewhere, you know, his
companions used to ask him, yada so Allah, you know, what do we
know about the hour? What do we know about the time in which all
life will cease to exist? And the Prophet Sall, Allahu Allah, he was
telling me he would respond by saying, What are you doing to
prepare for it? Right? Because there's no point in trying to
figure out when you will die, one cannot plan this, right? This is
one of those plans that we leave solely to the hands of Allah
subhanaw taala. And he above everyone else knows every single
human being start an endpoint. And that may be sometimes relieving
for people, and sometimes unsettling, right? It's one of
those things that literally every single person in this room has the
same level of knowledge about, which is, I don't know, right?
Very, very good. Anyone else in sha Allah? Yes, in the plasma?
Eternity, even if it's good attorney, just the idea of
something being like never ending has always caused so much anxiety
and fear for me, because
it's like, I'm not familiar with the idea of something just going
on forever. Yeah, exactly. Right. You almost have to trust a law,
right? It's like, Allah tells you that like Jana is going to be
everlasting. It's gonna be amazing. You're going to enjoy
forever, you're like, really the same honey and water and milk
every day. So I mean, I got you though, it's difficult to
conceptualize that. Very good. You have something
kind of gets people into this like nihilistic spiral where we're all
just going to die that really matters. But
there's a hadith that I always think about that. It's like, even
if the day of judgment comes, like it's almost human piano with
your hand, a sapling is still planted. So that to me means like,
nothing is futile. You do have the knowledge that everything we do in
this life does matter. So even like one tiny good deed
So Hala, right? Like every small thing matters, right? Very, very
good. Mashallah. So there is this idea and I'm going to share a
couple of verses in the Quran with you guys that's going to kind of
like put things into perspective. So insults Imran Allah Tada, he
says Kulu, nacinda Iike tool notes, he says that every single
soul will taste death. And he actually mentioned he says that he
says that ICA tool, which means to like, taste or experience it,
right? Because again, at the end of the day, death is something
that is an experience. I want you guys to think about this, I was
actually speaking to somebody earlier today, that, you know,
birth and death are so parallel to one another, even though they're
quite the opposite, right? One quite literally brings you into
this dunya and one takes you out of it. Both SubhanAllah. Right?
Are interestingly, if you think about it, their blessings, right?
The birth of a child is a blessing, quite literally life did
not exist, you know, 910 months ago, and now all of a sudden,
there is this breathing, heart beating, you know, yapping little
thing inside of your home, and Subhanallah it almost seems to you
from our knowledge that it came out of nowhere, right. But it was
difficult, the process of birth is difficult, it causes a lot of pain
for people at times, right? The child even if you think about it,
the scholars have written about this, they say that, even though
birth is such a beautiful thing. And childhood is such a beautiful
thing. For the child, we talk about the mother's difficulty of
it, but we actually don't think about the child the child has
basically kind of cocooned in its mother for 910 months, almost. And
now all of a sudden, that child is basically immersed into this world
that it's never seen before. And for the first time, it's on its
own, there's no cord anymore attaching it to its mother. So
that blessing also comes with a little bit of difficulty. And the
same parallel is drawn to death. Because death is a journey. Imam
Ghazali talks about the financial I mentioned that later today, that
death is a journey and hamdulillah there are scholars who talk about
the benefits of wanting it and also the benefits of not wanting
it. Because when you taste it that is not remote. It is an experience
that you go through. And like a lot of people said it's scary.
Sometimes it's horrific. Abu Bakar acidic Radi Allahu Taala on who
mentioned that, by the way, he said that death is no small feat.
It is a it is a horror to deal with even if the person who's
passing away is very close to Allah. It's a test right? The
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Prophet Musa Prophet
Ibrahim Maryam added Hassan, all these people were people who are
considered close to Allah. But don't you think they also cried
when they were born? Don't you think they also felt that initial
kind of like, emergence into the world as something that was
uncomfortable for them? So don't just think that this is something
that is, you know, easy for anybody? So it means like, Oh,
you're religious, you're gonna find death? Easy? No, no, that's
not the case. Always. Sometimes people who are pious will still go
through a difficulty during their death, because death is something
that's difficult for everyone to a certain degree, right. And so
Allah subhanaw taala talks about that. And then he mentioned he
says, we're in NAMA, to what fauna or Juraj come, he says that, you
know, every soul on that day will be given its due diligence, like
you're not going to escape anything, that day, everything is
going to come into full fruition, the day that you lied, and you
never asked Allah for any moment to you know, ask for his
forgiveness for it. On that day, there will be received screenshots
right, determining what happened on that day that you said you did
x, but you actually did why all these things will be kept and
ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada says that at the end of this ayah, he mentioned
Walmart will hire to dunya Illa Mata or la hora. He says, So
understand one thing, that this world the life of this world, is
like a fleeting enjoyment. MGTOW, who wrote, he mentioned that? It
seems like he just turned the page in your book. And now that story
is over. I mean, how many of y'all how real is this for all of us? I
know for sure with my own life, I just turned 30 this year. And I
realize now Subhanallah you know, that whole concept of like, man,
time is just going by faster now. Like when you were a kid, it
seemed like time was always going in slow motion. You were living
that movie in slow motion. And now all of a sudden, like, it seems
like it's playing out like 1.5 speed. And you're like, what,
what's going on here? Well, guess what the reality is people don't
want to talk about it, but you are getting closer and closer and
closer to that day, right? And again, as a Muslim, you always
have this decision to make. Am I going to approach this
conversation as a pessimist? Or am I going to approach this real life
situation with positivity and optimism that ALLAH SubhanA wa
Tada has made death a reality for me. So now what am I going to what
am I going to do about it in my life to make this a positive
experience? Right and
So then Allah subhana wa Tada continues in the Quran and he
says, We're unfuckable mimma Rosa cannot come in Kabul, and yet to
have a common mode for cooler Rob be Lola ahorro tiny Isla adjured.
In Caribbean, he says that, you know, every single person who will
taste death, they you know, if you want a good death, you should give
from what Allah has given you spend this life doing things that
Allah will be pleased with. This is a natural kind of, you know,
status quo that we all know as Muslims, but then he says that
when they taste death FEHA Gula Rob Biloela a horror attorney Illa
ajilon Kareem he says that every single person upon tasting death,
they will say to Allah, yah, Robbie, please, please, if you
only delayed me for a short period of time.
Like can I get one second to go back? Can I get one minute to go
back? There's one thing I have to do. You know, I was always
listening to this that, you know, a person upon their deathbed. They
will never be upset about that one business meeting that they missed,
but they will always be upset about that one hour that they
missed with their kids. They will always think back at that one
Ramadan where they didn't give it their full effort. Right. They'll
always think about that one time where they could have prayed that
Witter or that Sunnah prayer, but they chose not to. So on that day,
Allah to Allah says that all human beings will fall under that
umbrella. Or they'll tell they'll beg Allah, Oh, Allah, please,
please, please let me go back, even if it's for as he says, A
Jalen Corrib, just a small fraction of a minute. And you all
and somehow think about how misled we are with our concept of time.
We think like a second is not really much right now. We're like,
Oh, it's a second. There's like 60 of those in a minute and 60
minutes in an hour and how many hours in a day and this many days
in a week and a month in a year? Like that's our scope. But Allah
says that on the Day of Judgment, when your name is going to be
called, you're going to look at a second and you're gonna say, Oh,
my God, how much time
a second will seem like a month, a minute will seem like a year.
Because think about it guys, even a second is enough to say
Alhamdulillah one second. That's all it takes. And what she
mentioned over here that it could have been the smallest thing that
could tip your scale. It could have been a a Masha Allah or a
Subhanallah or Al Hamdulillah, or even just sitting after Salawat
after the herper and saying, Allahu Akbar 33 times. That's all
it took. And on that day, Allah is saying that is the day they will
realize the true meaning of time. While I said in the inside, let me
let me and Mufti Norman just a few weeks ago at heart where we're
talking about this, that right now we're like, oh, yeah, whatever,
dude, like, I got time. And that's truly the curse, right? That you
think you have so much time? Oh, my goodness, I have time and time
and time and time. And subhanAllah yesterday, you know, this, this
real kind of learning experience kind of brought this whole thing
into fruition? When Subhanallah my own teacher, our own teacher, we
call this our teacher shackled the Nasir, his father passed away
yesterday after fajr and we went to you know, his Janessa was held
here at the column, you know, Masjid on the other side of the
building, and Subhanallah as the coffin was being wheeled into the
masala you realize that there is quite literally a person who lived
80 plus years laying right there.
And everyone is gonna stand behind them and make the offer him and
after that door is over, everyone is going to follow his body to the
cemetery. And everyone is almost like, dreading that moment where
they will lower that coffin into the ground and walk away. And
subhanAllah we were sitting there thinking about sheiks Father, I'm
Allah, may Allah have mercy upon him. And at that time, you know,
what was it blew my mind y'all. I was there and it was the Islamic
you know, cemetery and Capello's not far from here.
And as we were bearing shuffled Monoceros father Mala, there were
like four other people that started tapping us on the shoulder
and they're like, oh, by the way, my grandmother is buried right
there. Oh, by the way, my cousin's buried right over there. And
subhanAllah one of our dear you know, imams and she you can Irving
Imam, gosh, if his daughter, H 15 was buried just around 200 feet
away from shackled Monoceros father. So me and my good friend,
Sheikh mobian, we looked at each other and we said, let's go, let's
go to her. And we walked up to her and Subhanallah there she was,
laying there resting, and on her headstone. It said her name 2007
to 2022.
And me and Sheikh mobian just broke into tears like a pair
have children?
Like, how is it possible? I'm 30 sheiks older than me. We're
standing here in front, and Subhanallah Allah subhanaw taala
called her name at 15.
And it hit me so hard because now I have a baby at home and I'm
thinking, what pain was a mom, gosh, have gone through
to lower his his baby and to the dirt.
And to neglect that reality is such a, it's such a dishonor to
her legacy. For us to sit here and say that I have so much time. It's
such a dishonor to her. Because she knows that no, no, no, no, you
don't have that much time. Start thinking about these things. Okay.
And so now I wanted to inshallah turn the conversation a little bit
to a hypothetical. If you knew that you had one day left to live,
what would you spend it doing? How would you spend your last 24
hours? And subhanAllah I did this with a bunch of classmates of mine
a couple of years ago, actually. And it was really interesting to
see the variety of answers. I want everyone to take a minute. Okay.
And I want you to turn to the person next to you, and I want you
to discuss with them this hypothetical up on the screen
right now. If you knew that you had 24 hours left, what would you
spend those 24 hours doing? Bismillah start and inshallah
we'll reconvene together as a group?
Okay Bismillah let's talk in sha Allah. Let's hear what we got. I
know there's so many people here mashallah, we can't get to
everybody. But we want to hear some in sha Allah, who wants to
share who wants to share if they had one day remaining in their
life? And this brings so much thought into a person's mind.
Right? If man Subhanallah and maybe it's a blessing that we
don't know when we're gonna die. But I mean, if we did, what would
we do? Right? What would we do? It's almost like Leila. So Allah
knew that if he disclosed deals with other every single Muslim on
the 27th that will be out there doing their best right and the
29th night they're like alright, Monday night here we go. Okay, go
ahead
I would spend time with my family
Wow Subhanallah interesting while you're like you're definitely like
a mathematician. He's like huh, family in mustard double
mashallah, good. No Michel, but I love what you said you said that
you would spend a lot of time you know, mending the relationships
that may have gone awry in the dunya right very beautiful.
Mashallah. Very, very good. Okay. Anyone else go ahead
into gender base up
so even though like the first thought that comes to my mind,
or something like that, that's just more on top and I know at the
end of the day that that's not gonna get into gender at the mercy
of Allah. So I think maybe I don't know like 24 hours straight of
like begging for forgiveness
on the back
yeah
yeah, absolutely. She spoke very much to the truth right that she
even mentioned the Hadith that no one will enter Jannah based upon
their own merit based upon their own art Mal, that you have to
speak to Allah and touch base with him about all your you know,
guilts and your
feelings within your heart and express them right and that's the
way you pass into paradise mashallah very good Anyone else
want to share what they would do? Let's go with you and then I'll go
to you after inshallah go ahead
so
basically
the reason for each
region
mashallah so many Muslims doubling up everyone's like Hasan at 10 Is
it Ramadan or not Ramadan? I don't know which one is it Hajj do I get
more if I'm in Mecca are good mashallah very good I like it
though the train of thought is mashallah very productive I like
it go ahead
so what we got to do is we got to ask our people that we wrong
and ask them to give
a judgement about ourselves
also like that
yeah
yeah, that's a little personal.
I felt that pain in the voice right there. Be like the US
government I owe them so much money no mashallah very good
hamdulillah unless Joe Biden comes through first and trial I mean,
so very good. hamdulillah very very good. So pay off pay off
paying off debts right? Both financially also settling
disagreements and conflicts quite literally in the dunya between
people very good Mashallah. Anyone else want to share what they would
do? Yes
the point where you can do with it yeah.
Right
wherever
beautiful mashallah powerful good. Somebody here? Yes. kind of
piggybacking off of him, it's like, the cause and effect right?
Like, as discreetly as possible, like, do something that will have
a lasting effect. So like, building a masjid or donating
something because like, you never know, like that, even if it's
small, that can have a big effect, right? So kind of like what do you
say get rid of like everything and like, have something that will
have lasting effects? Subhan Allah Subhanallah Beautiful, beautiful.
How many of y'all would spend a good amount of time just talking
to Allah those last 24 hours? Just speaking to him? Katara who, as
though you can see him right in front of you, right? Subhanallah
there was a famous poet that, you know, Ibn Rajab al Hanbali Rahim
Allah He actually mentioned in one of his books, he says that a very
famous poet one time he says, a stuck gooey Laker Yeah, Caribbean
na e. Shoko Varma e la isla Zula. Dilma, he says that a sinner, oh,
Allah yearns for you. Oh, near one, the way that a thirsty human
being drinks, what cleaner wants that cool water at the end of a
warm day? Right. So that person who basically yearns for Allah
subhanaw taala, they're almost a person who is dehydrated in the
dunya. Right? There, they want something, they want something
they want something, but Subhanallah this poet, he mentions
that who is the owner of this, this, this this request? It's a a
sinner, a person who sinned in their life. They want to meet
Allah, because they know that that's the one place that they'll
actually find relief, right? I was literally in a session earlier
today. Subhanallah where somebody was asking it was a q&a session.
And somebody was asking, like, what do you do if like, you're
tired of being in the repetitive void of sinning and then repenting
and sitting and repenting and sitting and repenting, like one
second to stop. And I said, as soon as Allah subhanaw taala calls
your name. That's when it's going to stop. Because you're a human
being, it's going to keep on going in your life. Until that person
who is a sinner, all of us will finally make our final turn. And
Allah subhana wa Tada will say, well, now you're with me now.
You're with me. Now. You're going to be in my company now and this
is why you know, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he
actually mentioned he said, that, you know, when a Muslim approaches
death, don't be too
stream on either side. Don't don't want it and don't be afraid of it.
And he mentioned it himself to suddenly says, Let none of you
wish for death in light of a harm which descends upon you so
basically if you're like, you know, if you're afraid of
something in the dunya don't ask Allah for death he said, if such
an urge is in suppressible let one say oh Allah grant me life as long
as life is better for me and take my life if death is better for me.
That door is so powerful Oh Allah grant me life so long as life is
better for me.
Keep on giving me life keep on giving me breaths to breathe as
long as this life is good for me yeah Allah continue to allow me to
live and only until you think your Allah that death is better for me
than this dunya then and only then yeah, Allah please, please, I'm
ready to go with you. Okay. And you know the prophets of Allah
Islam he actually mentioned he says, Let none of you wish for
death, nor pray for it before it is to come. Meaning like, don't
think that, uh, you know, like, the whole thing of oh, I should
have died. You know, like the whole concept. Oh, I should have
died so many times. No, it's okay to reflect over that as like a
form of sugar and gratitude. But don't be like oh my god like, Man,
I'm like this like crazy like kid who like basically Dodge Death
eight times in my life. All right, you know, the Prophet said, don't
wish for death or pray for it before it's to come. Because
again, agile is one of those things that angel Jibreel Allah
His Saddam He breathed into your soul when you were when you were
in your mother's womb. Y'all remember the Hadith of the Prophet
SAW Selim where he said that, you know, you were in your in your
mother's womb for a certain period of time. You were you know,
something called medulla, not for Allah. Right, those three things
and then after those three things, you become an embryo and Angel
Jibreel basically brought breeds your soul into you. And along with
that, he comes with the cutter of Allah, how long you're going to
live? It could be five years, it could be 10 years, it could be 50
years. It could be 90 years, Allah awesome. But don't don't curse
your years. Don't say like, oh man, like I'm living this like
miserable 90 year old life now. Right? Man and hamdulillah Maybe
Allah subhana wa Tada kept you alive for 90 years because you
still need to do something that a 50 year old already? Did. You ever
think about that? Like the reason that you're still alive is because
Allah knows for you. There's unfinished business on the table.
You haven't completed it yet. You haven't done exactly what Allah
has told you to do yet, okay. And he says, Verily, when one of you
passes, his work is brought to an end. You're done. What you can do
with your own hands, is now complete. And verily a believers
lifespan only increases him in good. But note the word he said a
believer, not just a human being a believer, a believers lifespan
will only increase them in good. Every single breath that a
believer takes, it's an opportunity for that believer to
c'est la ilaha illa Allah every second, it could be that La Ilaha
illa Allah, that will get you into paradise. So Allah is keeping you
alive for that one more. But then there was also that opposite,
where people who humbly Allah are so close to God, they are excited
to meet him. How many of y'all have ever met people, elders in
your life Subhanallah family members that could have been sick.
And you saw them, and there was some sort of Sakina that they had,
right before they passed away. Y'all witnessed that before. Like,
it was almost like they were ready to go. I remember this with my my
grandfather, may Allah have mercy upon him, he passed away.
And subhanAllah my mother would tell me that when she spent her
last few moments with her father, she said that there was like this,
almost this atmosphere of just sukoon surrounding him. Like
everybody else was worried. But he was just like
hamdulillah
and some of the scholars even right is that some people that are
close to death, they can almost feel Allah's Presence already in
this dunya
they can feel it in front of them. That's why they're no longer in
even in that, that headspace. Where, you know, everyone else is
already grieving and mourning. That person is actually almost
like happy in a very strange way. Right. And so, you know, it's so
interesting that,
you know, there's a beautiful statement, it was a poem, where
all this is the there was a poet who says, well called the psalm
two on the left on a dirty, the hairy Coulee, her, Wyoming,
Wyoming, they all come that fit through crme he says that when a
person who is close to Allah passes away, they say, I have
fasted Yet Allah from all the delights and luxuries of my life.
And the day that I meet you is the day that I break my heart
asked
it's almost like I've been fasting my entire life yet Allah I've been
fasting from everything you told me to stay away from Allah I
fasted from cheating and lying and I fasted from things that were
desirable to me. I fasted from so many things is fast from saying
that thing that would come so naturally to me when that person
hurt me, I almost wanted to get them back by saying something to
them. Ya Allah that fast was for my entire life. And the day that
I'm with you is the day that I'm going to bite into that date in
the hereafter. What a way to think Subhanallah that you can't rest
until you finally meet Allah subhana wa Tada abou hasm is a
famous scholar, he said, he was asked, How is the arrival to Allah
for the obedient one, like what's it like when a believer arrives in
front of Allah? And he says that it's like the arrival of an
absentee to his family who's eagerly waiting for his return.
And you got to think about it right? Like that famous idea that
every one recites whenever somebody passes away in Melilla,
he were in LA he Raji Arun, that were from God Lilla he were from
him. What in not And verily, e la, he to him is our ultimate return.
broads your own it's forever. That Roger your own is not just a
return that you're like, oh, you know what, I'm back from a trip
but I'm gonna go on another trip. When you return to Allah, you are
now humbly law, your home, your home, the heart feels at peace.
Finally, after so long the heart feels at peace. And this is why,
by the way, for anyone who's lost anyone, and this is like my
sincerest and I felt this pain as well. When anyone has lost any
single human being in their life. There's always that feeling that
man, I almost feel like guilty. That like, you know, I almost feel
guilty that I there's so much time has passed since the left. But I
want you guys to know right now that they are literally with Allah
just smiling. There with Allah smiling. You know what those
parents who lose children? What's the narration about children, kids
who pass away before their parents, who are they in the
company of Prophet Ibrahim Prophet Ibrahim alayhis. Salam is
babysitting all the children who left their parents before their
parents passed away.
And it says that when these parents will enter the hereafter,
the children just like they did in the dunya, that they're going to
go up to their parents and grab them by the fingers. Because these
children never got to grow to the point where their hands could
grasp the hands of their parents. Their hands can only wrap around
one of the fingers of their mothers or their fathers. And
without any question, just like kids do, you know, they will drag
you to wherever they want you to go, Mom, come come, I want to go
here and the moms like no, I don't know, I don't know about that. I
want to I want to drink coffee furs. And the kid on the Day of
Judgment will be forcibly dragging their mom and dad into paradise.
And the mom and dad will say I know. I didn't get judged yet.
What are you doing? And the kid will say forget about it. You're
coming with me. I've waited so long for you meet Ibrahim. He's
right here. He's really nice. Can you imagine what a scene that
would look like? Right? And this is why Abu has him he says that.
It's like the arrival of a person who missed their family for them
who missed their family for so long. And they're eagerly waiting
their return. And this is like Allah.
Allah was waiting for you. Don't you think Allah misses you?
Isn't that incredible to think about? We never think about Allah
though. Wait, but Allah misses us. Like this. Dunya. Again, Allah is
different from a human being because he doesn't have the same
emotions that we do. But Allah misses you.
Like this dunya is separation from between you and Allah, in the
hereafter when Allah gets to have you again. It's like a family
member. Welcome back. You're here now you're with me. And you will
say Alhamdulillah Allah, I'm so happy. We just can't imagine it.
Because again, our dunya is so limited in scope. We're like,
Yeah, home is like 1234. Shady Grove. That's where home is.
Right. George Bush Turnpike. That's my street, right? You
Auntie that's my spot. Like, that's my life. No, no, that's not
your life.
Your life is back with Allah. This is just like a little temporary
spot that Allah has given you to be in for a period of time, right?
And so I'm looking at how can we prepare for this, and I want you
guys to really, really focus on this one, because it's so
powerful. Remember, there's only one time in the latter years of
his life. He was a matter of writing letters. He used to write
letters, by the way, so a lot of his books ended up being letters
that he wrote before that people just compiled together. So there
was a letter that he
wrote, where he said, This is a letter about greeting death. I
want to write a letter about greeting death. And so mmm because
it he says,
You have asked me to write a letter about the readiness for
death. And he says, No, that death is just an expression used, that
you and I have made up in our human language for the journey
from this world back to Allah. That's what death is. We've made
it a fancy word, but all it is is us packing our bags and getting
ready to go see Allah. And he says, anyone traveling to one who
has the majesty that Allah has al Karim Allah for this, this being
that has this most majesty, they need three things for their
journey. Okay, the first thing is, they'll need some provisions for
the road. Just like any trip you take, you will need some supplies
for that road trip, you will need some supplies for that, that trip
you're taking. The second thing is you will need to cut off certain
things that are holding you back from that journey. You'll need to
cut off things that are going to be impeding your ability to
travel. And the third thing is he says you will need a gift to give
to your host when you get there. You can't show up empty handed.
Y'all daisies and Arabs know about this right? And everybody else
probably knows about this, that you can't show up empty handed
even if it's like that one like candle that that Auntie has 40
times over. You still have to give it to her right? Welcome. This is
a candle for you. Right? Like imagine you can show up empty
handed. So a man with his data. He says, What are these three things,
the provisions you take with you for the road, he says this is none
other than your taqwa in Allah.
This provision that you have on you like your bag of provisions,
it's your ability to know that Allah is waiting on the other side
for you. You have to believe in it.
You cannot give yourself any chance to believe that after
death, it's just blank screen.
Because how sad would that be?
That Salah did not mean anything. Fasting did not mean anything.
Hajj did not mean anything. No, no, no, you're provisions for your
journey to Allah is that you're excited to see him. You know that
those Salawat meant something to you. You know, every moment of
charity meant something to you. All of those things will now add
up to that ultimate meeting with Allah. So that's your provision,
your taqwa, your God consciousness, your your knowledge
that Allah is there. Number two, that severing of ties that
prevents one from going forward. He says a traveler may be tied
down by his or her debtors, as if they were holding on to the very
tails of their clothing and preventing him or her from moving
towards their destination. In order to advance on this journey,
the traveler must free themselves and break the ties that hold them
back. And I want everyone to do this right now.
Because everybody has these demons in their closets, including me.
And skeletons in their closets, including meat. What are the
things that you have a hard time separating yourself from? Make it
real for yourself? Like I can't imagine leaving And subhanAllah
you know, and again, this is hard to talk about. I can't imagine
leaving my family.
I can't imagine leaving my home.
I can't imagine leaving my community. How am I going to how
am I going to separate myself from that? But those are what Imam
Ghazali mentions as severing those ties, you have to you know,
subhanAllah This is so powerful, you know upon the death of the
child of the Allahu anhu, the beloved wife of the prophesy
centum you know, who informed the prophesy centum about the death of
Khadija it was Angel Jibreel himself.
He came to the Prophet Allah Himself to sit down. And again,
the worry what's gonna happen when I leave my family? I don't want to
I don't want to leave who's going to take care of my kids and my my
grandchildren and my home and my spouse and all these different
things I haven't made I haven't come to terms with that. And the
profits are some was feeling the same way. And Gibreel added his
Sadam, he goes up to the Prophet so I said um, and he says, Yeah,
Mohammad Rasool Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he goes, you've
taken care of her so beautifully. You've taken care of her so
honorably and so you know, you've just done so much good to her.
Now let it be Allah Who takes care of her.
There's a palace made out of one singular Pearl waiting for her.
These are the Allahu on
this
ceilings of her palace are 70,000 feet tall.
There are rooms that are unfathomable the number of them
that are going to be within her palace. And so when Gibreel told
the prophets of Salaam, this, he finally was able to at least
understand now that Khadija is going into the caretaking of Allah
azza wa jal.
So think about this for yourself, what is the thing that's holding
you back? What's the thing that's holding you from moving forward in
your life? Right? And then the third thing he mentioned the man
was it he says, the gift that you present to a host of the Majesty
of Allah subhanho wa Taala because you can go to Allah empty handed,
but what can you give Allah that he could be happy with? Right?
Allah has everything Allah doesn't need anything from you. Imam Al
Ghazali he says, the gift that a traveler to the hereafter should
prepare to Allah for Allah subhana wa Tada is their Iman their Eman
that no one was able to see in the dunya for all the years they were
alive. No one was able to see their Iman they could see small
snippets of it. They could see like their devotion and Salah once
in a while. But again, that wasn't done for the people that was done
for Allah. So there was no sort of like scale or register on their
arm or on their shoulder on their back that said well Eman level was
right here their Eman Tang is pretty high or low that was all
protected in the dunya. So now finally in the hereafter Imam does
it he says that a believer is able to almost quite literally pick up
their Eman and say Allah this is for you.
This is for you, Ya Allah.
I kept this more beautiful on the inside for 70 years, because you
told me to have sincerity. So I never went around and bragged
about it to other people. But Ya Allah, I'm here, presenting it to
you right now. Okay. And finally, I wanted to share this narration
with everybody and please have patience with me because this is
hard for me to share with everyone.
We have to address the concept of how we deal with death when we see
it with other people.
One of my favorite stories that really just shakes me a lot, and
it makes me think on so many different levels is the story of
honest abnormality, or the hola Juan
so unassuming nomadic, he narrated this himself. He said my mother
also lame. He had a mother. Her name was on Solane he says she
gave birth to a son and sent me with him to the messenger of allah
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam so honest of nomadic, he had a baby
brother born from his mother on Sudan. And she told him, oh,
Anna's take your baby brother to the Prophet. salAllahu alayhi
wasallam that was what they used to do. Okay. And so unless being a
young person himself, he was excited. He said, I took my baby
brother
in my arms, and I went to the prophesies that I mean, he says
Yato so Allah, this is my brother. Imagine like a little kid, like
taking his brother and his arm. So this is my brother, to the
prophets, Islam, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he
took a date, a little date, and he softened it with his teeth. And he
let the little baby just kind of suck on the date for a little bit.
Again, there's a lot of wisdom behind this because it was the
Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam. Right. So he chewed it and he
basically gave it to the baby just a suck on for a little bit, just
so he gets some of that, that under that blessing, right.
And so, Anna says that, after a little while,
the son of unschooling became very sick. My baby brother became very
sick.
When Abu Talha
the husband on estranged husband, Obatala.
He went to the masjid, for prayer one night, that little baby passed
away.
And also Elaine.
She told her family, including unassembled Malik, she said,
please do not tell him about this news without me telling him first.
I want you to think about the pain of a mother who just lost an
infant.
She said she's dealing with her own her own mind right now. She
said please don't tell my husband without me telling him first.
When Ebola returned from the mustard, he said, How's my baby?
How's my son doing?
And she said
he has more peace.
For now, I will tell her than he ever was.
And so she brought him his food.
And he ate thinking that his son was there with him.
After eating a bottle hurt, he laid down to sleep.
And I'm Celine. The narration says that she spent time with him that
evening, being a husband and a wife.
I want you to think about the emotions going through her heart.
And at the end of that night, where they spent valuable, you
know, quality time with each other.
Um, Salim said, Oh, Abdullah,
if some people were to borrow something from another group of
people,
and that original or that group that was borrowed from us for its
return, what they refuse to give it back to them, like if a family
borrowed from another family, and that family said, Okay, now I need
you to return it back to me. She said, Would it be wrong if that
family refused to give it to them?
And he says, of course, he says, of course it'd be wrong to not
repay a debt.
And she says,
For in a NACA Kana idea, 10 min Allah
for Qabalah, who, for estado Jarrah will Hamidullah. She says,
Verily, your son, my son, was a loan from ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada.
And today, we had to return him.
So we should say together, verily, from Allah, we come and to Him we
return
an apple doll, how God so he was, I mean, think about this guy's he
thought his baby boy was near him.
And he got angry. He got emotional. And he said, No, this
no, why why wouldn't you tell me earlier?
And he said, You didn't tell me and I, and I thought that he was
right here. And so he went to the prophets of Allah are they he was
on them. And he says, yada so Allah, my baby boy passed away.
And again, this is why a lot of times when death comes to the
family, people can miss direct their anger and a lot of different
ways because everyone's trying to figure out their emotions. How do
I handle this moment? And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam he says, after he heard his entire story, he says, Baraka
Allahu Allah Kuma Fie, Leila T coma.
He says, May Allah bless you, and the night that you and your wife
spent together.
And that was the end of the Hadith.
I want you to think about
how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam not once questioned what
I'm so lame did, because he already knew the immense heart
ache she must have been going through
the pain that she had in her heart as a mother.
And even after that she was trying so hard
to keep her husband free, at least for a little while from the pain
that she felt.
And so when he found out he broke down,
but her strength, her courage, her
Eman
it gained the dua of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam
as a man who buried five of his six children that he had.
I want you guys to know that in Islam, there is nothing wrong with
grieving.
Because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam taught us he
said, the eyes may be crying tears of sadness. And the hearts may be
absolutely heavy with pain and suffering. But we will never ever
utter a single word that is displeasing to our Allah subhanaw
taala
so know that death is inevitable. But at the end of the day death is
something that is a part of our journey back to Allah subhana wa
Tada and it is wise of us to reflect over it once in a while to
keep us honest with our Creator.
And we ask Allah subhana wa Tada to accept from all of us, me know,
but I mean, can you really quickly come can you possibly Instagram
live in sha Allah, and I would in sha Allah like to now as I
promised, all of you all, do a little bit of q&a in sha Allah to
Allah with everybody. Okay, I know this was heavy. I know that, you
know, this was something that was very, very, you know, thought
provoking and deep for everybody. But in sha Allah, hopefully we can
end
With a small little five minute q&a, that inshallah will be of
some benefit. So there's a QR code up on the screen for everyone in
sha Allah, you can kind of hover your camera over it and we will
answer some questions in sha Allah Maghrib is in about five six
minutes so in sha Allah will answer some questions in the
meantime Yes, you had a question go ahead
sorry
dua is the only thing that can train change your color Yes. But
at the end of the day, God there is I want I always teach people
that God there is of two levels. There's other that is obviously
something that you know about and there's clutter of color that
Allah subhanaw taala knows about. So Allah still knows that you're
doing I will change the color that he knows, right? So something to
think about Inshallah, right always keeps a little bit of a, a
formal distance between us and Allah subhana wa Tada which is
healthy, right? Beautiful. Very good.
Okay,
let's start answering some questions. First 100 Allah here we
go.
Is traveling alone as a woman haram? Is it Instagram live off
Akram?
Hamdulillah.
So you're saying that this can No, you can keep that on that's
recorded that can be edited. So this can no way get back to me,
huh? All right. Okay. So
there is a, there is a narration that mentions that traveling for a
woman alone is not the most ideal situation because just of safety
and logic and best practice, but it actually, the scholars have
said, through their Quran and their Hadith, that there were
moments in which the prophets of Allah Who are they who was salam
would actually allow his wives and his family members to travel
together, alone, in periods of time. So when it comes to woman
traveling, let's say for like, ombre or hudge, or, you know, out
of country for certain purposes, if it is accompanied by a
Muharram, right, and the mom can actually be played by a person of
trust in the community, like an email or a scholar. And also if
it's in a big group, there is actually room for conversation
within that scope. And this is why by the way, you know, places like
um, you know, obviously a woman who are traveling with other woman
can go to Amara together, et cetera, et cetera, and hamdulillah
it's something that has been established in our deen, okay, a
safe way meet halal. Is that like the Impossible Burger?
I'm assuming it is.
Can Work Okay, I gotta look this up in sha Allah, I don't want to
miss answer anything. But I will look it up in sha Allah and get
back to you. Okay. If we have a family member who is terminally
ill, what is your advice on how we should act toward them? If a
family member is terminally ill be there for them as much as you
possibly can? To be quite honest with you read Quran for them every
single day so that they can hear you. Try as hard as you can to do
that. If they're terminally ill tell them that ALLAH SubhanA wa
Tada again, that narration of Allah removing pain and sin from
them by each millisecond of pain that they're going through, remind
them about this, okay? And this is something that will inshallah
cause some sort of Sakina to enter the heart in sha Allah Tada is
enlisting in the military haram Lord have mercy. This q&a session
went a whole different direction than I thought
is enlisting in the military haram. I want you to one thing I
want to share by the way, Haram is a very, very strong word. Okay.
Haram implies there is sinfulness that is without a shadow of a
doubt. Okay. For something to be haram, it has to be extremely,
extremely what we say in Arabic and in fifth, Qatari, which means
that it has to be definitive. Okay. Are there moments of being
enlisted in a military? Not not not permissible? Sure. But does
that make the entire experience haram in and of itself? I cannot
say that. So if a person hasn't been through that experience, and
you feel bad about it, or you're feeling questionable about it, may
Allah subhanho wa Taala ease your pain and your your anxiety, but
you cannot call the entire thing haram just because there's certain
components of it that are somewhat questionable. Okay. What if your
parent died? When you're young, and he may have some debt you
don't know about? How can one relieve their father or mother
from this? First and foremost, understand that Allah to Allah
will not burden the soul with another person's burden. Okay.
Your parents debt is not your duck. But if you would like for
them to have relief and and Sakina in their afterlife and you want to
do this for them out of the goodness of your heart, then
you're more than welcome.
to pay off their debt if you inshallah want to and again, what
person would not want to for their parents, if they know that there's
something that exists at the time of their death, but also if you're
not able to, I don't want people to think that you have to
basically take loans to pay off your parents that that's not
something that Allah subhanaw taala would ever ask of a person,
make the offer them, ask Allah to forgive them in sha Allah?
Yeah, okay, very good. What is the purpose of the date in the mouth
of that baby? So actually, there's actually there's actually
commentary on this, that there is actually a blessing in even the
saliva of the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam. Some of the
prophets are some chewed on the date. And he basically allowed
that child to basically kind of chew on it themselves. It kind of
gave blessings. I mean, people would, by the way, guys, people
would collect the sweat of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam
there's baraka and all of that Inshallah, okay? I'm not going to
answer number three, because I already have found a Muslim girl
handler
How do you find a Muslim girl? They're everywhere. hamdulillah
right, everywhere. Everywhere mashallah, right, more of them
than men? I think so. Be a good person. Inshallah. Don't try too
hard. No flexing Instagram Stories, roots on the law. Okay.
If the Prophet saw some said the only one of the sects in Islam is
correct one. How do we know which one is right? Good question. I
would ask a knowledgeable scholar about the details of each of which
ones you're asking about specifically, and I would be very
keen on not making this like a public journey, but something
that's a little bit more between you and Allah subhanho wa Taala to
allow the most sincerity to be a part of it.
Again, I follow the mud hub of Quran and Sunnah of the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And so whatever the Prophet saw some did
and advised hamdulillah I'll follow it blindly in sha Allah,
okay. All right in sha Allah, we'll get to some more
26 Lord have mercy. Okay.
Inshallah, we'll address some of these next time. I believe it's
time for a motive. So inshallah we'll wrap up with that and we'll
do some more q&a In sha Allah after next Oh, if we did not hold
on y'all sit on ya can learn how to live together.