Safi Khan – Soul Food Self Improvement for the Sake of Allah
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All righty sha Allah. Let's go ahead and get started Bismillah
Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah what are the early
he was happy he edge Marine salamati como rahmatullahi wa
barakaatuh who everybody, sha Allah everyone is doing well
welcome home, welcome to roots
Hamdulillah, we are really fortunate in sha Allah tonight to
go through a conversation, that hamdulillah is going to make every
single person in here think about something from their own point of
view. And the beauty of this conversation tonight is nobody can
think for anybody else. No one can speak for anybody else, that this
is going to be a conversation that is going to be extremely
intrinsic, you're going to have to look deep within your own heart to
answer certain questions that Insha Allah, we will be discussing
tonight. And this topic, the scholars in our faith, they speak
very, very, you know intensely about why because it has so much
to do with not only you, but it has to do with your relationship
with Allah. It has to do with your relationship with the people
around you. And it has a lot to do with you as a person and how you
see yourself. And this is the conversation of this topic in our
deen called maraca. Okay, the conversation of self improvement,
the conversation of who am I and where am I going in my own life?
And what am I doing? Islam actually encourages us to ask
these questions. You know, a lot of times we get really
misconstrued with the deen that we think that in Islam because of our
own cultural baggage of the way that we've been taught Islam
growing up that this is a religion of no questions. Okay? Just do
what you're told. There's no There's no answer to your
questions. There are no Islam encourages healthy questions.
Islam encourages a person to ask themselves, why am I doing what
I'm doing? Right? And again, like I said, there will talk about this
in sha Allah, there's a Hadith of the Prophet salallahu it
Salam, Min Arafa NAFSA who forgot the Arafa or Abba? who a person
who now who knows and acknowledges themselves, they have an idea of
who they are and why they are forgot the rfl robber who
subsequently they will understand Allah subhana wa Tada that much
better. They will appreciate Allah subhanaw taala that much better.
Y'all ever heard of that? That statement that you're angry for
all the wrong reasons? This is going to be a session that will
address that no longer in sha Allah, will you be angry for the
wrong reasons, you will understand why you are the Way You Are you
you'll understand why that certain things happen in your life, the
way that they happen, you'll understand why, you know, you
struggle with certain things very innately. Okay, so in sha Allah,
we're going to dive into this together today, the first thing
that I want everyone to do in sha Allah and hamdulillah we're where
we have a solid group of people here today. So we can kind of
engage in this together in our individual groups. I want everyone
to think about this. When it comes to self reflection, when it comes
to self improvement. When it comes to self betterment. There has to
be a very concerted effort at the individual level for a person to
seek time, in order to think about these things. Right? How many of
us in here we are coping mechanism is actually to kind of occupy our
time as much as we can. So we don't have to think about certain
things that trouble us, right? Like, you know, there's like this,
like inevitable looming date coming into your calendar. It's a
week away, and maybe a few days away, and you're like, Yeah, I
think there's a spot on the counter that gotta clean real
quick, you know, you're distracting yourself constantly,
because you don't want to deal with it, right. But again, you
know, coping mechanisms kind of vary from person to person, and
sometimes they may be healthy or unhealthy. But Islam does
encourage us to take time to take time to think be alone if you need
to be right. Because sometimes even our friends that are good for
us can be means of distraction for ourselves. That, you know, we know
who our friends are, we know their names, we know their character,
but we might not even know who we are. We're just playing this role
that we kind of came to, right? We're playing this character in
this really weird movie called life. So Islam encourages us to
really get in tune with who you are, and know who you are. Okay,
so the first question, think of a time in your life when you felt
you need a time away. Okay, y'all ever heard of like that out of the
office? Kind of, you know, statement? I'm not here. I'm away.
I'm not I'm not in right now. Think of a time where you felt
this about your life. You just needed a break from life. And why
was it necessary? Okay, so what I want everyone to do, mashallah, we
have a lot of people who scattered through the entire hall today, I
want you to kind of Huddle up with a group near you. And I want you
to talk a little bit with your group about a moment in your life
where you felt that you just need a time away, you needed a break,
you need a little bit of space, right? And talk about why why did
you need that space? All right, so inshallah go ahead, and Miriam's
gonna talk to the couch next to her, I'm just kidding.
So talk to somebody in sha Allah around you and discuss these two
points and we'll reconvene together inshallah
Okay insha Allah let's talk
All right, so who wants to start us off in sha Allah a time in your
life where you felt like you needed a little bit of time away?
And why did you feel that you needed that time away? Anyone want
to start us off in sha Allah
yes go ahead
school it's like four months of like constantly grinding like
clubs and like work and like patronages classes. So I usually
take like the first two to three days before like break either
whether Christmas break or summer break to like just relax
away from like
Yeah, very good. So he mentioned Masha Allah He said that after
some big semester or like a big kind of like project or a big you
know time in which you kind of exerted yourself a lot it's always
beneficial to take a little bit of time away from people from
socializing from going out etc. And just kind of enjoying the time
with yourself just a little bit okay? MashAllah good anyone else?
Anyone else want to share a time and why okay go ahead
week and you're just like cracking down on your classes got to time
your essay
you got to
just have time for your subjects subject and then
you section off but like yeah you're
okay good mashallah very, very good. Okay, good. Anyone else?
Anyone else have a time in which they felt Yes? Go ahead
sure
Yeah, very good. So early morning hours right making sure that like
you don't have that distraction variable in your life where people
will hit you up and text you also you know which friends like oh
professor I was getting
this is a really messed up thing. You shouldn't you should judge
other people. But no, it's very right right. Like you're waking up
in the early morning to kind of like get some time for yourself
not you know, introducing that variable of distraction by other
people and other things. MashAllah very, very good. Anyone else?
Anyone else have any moment? Yes.
Okay, very good. So after like a conflict, okay, very good. Allows
you to decompress a little bit, okay, Masha, Allah, you know, this
is interesting. I want to share something with you guys. So, the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam was a very balanced person. I want
you guys to know that. So the Prophet SAW Selim was never too
far to the left, nor was he too far to the right. He was not a
person who socialized until the night ended. Nor was he a person
of isolation to the point where he neglected his relationships. If
anybody wants to look at what the model of a human being should be,
again, look at the cannula computer Sula, he was what on
Hasina, right? That his his life, quite literally is a blueprint,
right? Like if you were to measure your life up to his to see where
you are in the way that you handle yourself when it comes to family
or work. It's a great litmus to see what type of aspirations as a
believer that you should have. And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam as a person who was a human being just like you and me,
I want you guys to understand and appreciate that he also went
through moments in his life, where he realized that he needed a
break, okay. And this is very interesting, because in tradition
of the people that he belonged to the Arabs in Mecca, right? They
had this tradition that they would call to hunt north, which
basically means to like seclude to like retreat, okay. And the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was at the end of the day a
Qureshi man, right? So you know not
Everything has to do with Islam or not Islam, you know, this whole
idea of culture versus Islam, sometimes they can coincide.
Right? So the Prophet SAW Selim used to actually partake in this
very frequent, very strategic time away from everything in his life.
And not just that, everyone knew that when a person was kind of
going through that stage that 200th, that they would actually
allow them to have space. How many of us, like, appreciate the
friends in our lives that actually appreciate our space? Right? Like,
when you go MIA for like a day or two, they're not like, hey, hey,
what's going on? Like, why don't you respond to my text messages,
you're like, Man, this whole thing I'm reconsidering, but they a good
friend, they know that sometimes you do need your space, a good
friend, they know that in order to be there for you. They also need
you to be there for yourself. And so the prophesized that, um, he
would go through this 200 situation where and his spot was
very interesting. It was in hot ahead. It was in the cave of Hera
in this mountain called Jable. A newer, and this again,
subsequently was where he received his revelation. Right? And again,
it was not like an Islamic thing, because it was done before Islam
came, right. In fact, they're scholars that ride the bus, they
say, What can a valley commitment a 100th of equalization vilja idea
that the Quran is actually used to partake in 200th? In their their
period of ignorance, so people used to go to a retreat, right?
Like, I think retreats. How many of y'all have you ever been on a
retreat before anyone? A retreat, like going out of town? Man
SubhanAllah. So many Muslims in here like retreat? Brother, my
parents made me come home at 5:30pm. What what retreat? Are you
talking about? Right? SubhanAllah. But this is a tradition. Okay. Um,
and while he was away, he would just kind of sit in seclusion. And
he would go inside this cave. Anyone ever seen how to head off
before with your own eyes, like if you were there in person, if
anyone's ever seen pictures of it, it's incredible. Is it big or
small without a hit on anyone? Very, very tightly packed. It's
like a tiny little cave. I wouldn't even call it a cave. I
would call it like a little crevice within a mountain. So the
prophets also, it wasn't like a hangout spot. You know how like,
we're like, Man, I need a break from humanity. And then you hit up
like your eight group chests that you're in. But that's not a break
from humanity. That's just you like being bored. Okay. The
profits are some chose got a hit on number one, because it was what
his grandfather Abdullah Matata used to do. But also, he used to
be able to see Makkah from far away. He used to still be attached
to home to a certain degree. But it was also small enough of a
space where he knew that he couldn't give into like that
social pressure of being like, alright, friends come along,
right. It's like a social vibe. We're all gonna go grab boba and
gotta head out tonight. No, no, he was like, I need to do this alone.
I need to be alone for a little bit. And I want you guys to think
about the scholars they write about this. When we talk about
self refinement, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam
received the greatest gift of all humanity, in a time of seclusion
away from people.
And I want you guys to think about this. But the moments in which you
have some of your most intimate time with Allah, right, and you
will have intimate time with Allah in gatherings like Ramadan and
totowa and whatnot. But is our entire Dean our entire faith
experience? Is it just a social experience? Or is it something
personal?
Can I close a door and have a conversation with Allah, just as I
do with 1000 people around me in Ramadan nights, right? Like, can I
do that? And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam, he
would be doing 200 But the scholars, they would say, for the
purpose of Todd, but for the purpose of worship, he wouldn't
just seclude because he was like, yeah, man, like, sick of my wife.
Like, no, that's not what he was. In fact, his wife was such a, an
amazing person. These are the Allahu anha that she would
actually encourage him. You're like dreaming now. You're like, Oh
my God, how nice would it be for my parents to encourage me to like
take time away? Your parents thoughts of time away is sitting
like right next to them on their lap. Right? Telling me better
about problems like you are the problems getting.
So but like really, right? Imagine having supportive family members
who tell you hey, takes take some days off. In fact, these are the
Allahu anha she would make food for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam. She was like man you need time away I got you let me
just cook you this like naughty real quick for the last few a few
days. Go have fun of there, right like just spend some time alone
and the
Prophet SAW Saddam was appreciative. And this is why by
the way, that when he received that revelation, a Quran Bismillah
Bacala. The HELOC Why do you think her deja was so supportive of it?
Because she knew that he received this extremely beautiful gift from
God in a moment that was supportive,
that they almost did this together. That perhaps if she, if
she told her husband, no, no, you're gonna stay at home, you're
not allowed to go out and have like these little retreat camping
trips by yourself that perhaps Allah would not have revealed him
the Quran at the time that he did it that he gave it to him. So this
idea of kind of taking time away is an extremely important one.
Okay, so now we're going to ask this question, and now we're going
to kind of divulge a little bit deeper. How does one's ability to
refine the self have an impact on their closeness with Allah
subhanaw taala the first thing that I wanted to share with you
guys and this is incredible. Okay, this is actually insulted hour off
check this out. It's beautiful. Allah he says, was quoted Rebecca
fee nuff Sikka. He says, remember your Lord within yourself.
Remember your Lord within yourself.
Remember Allah when you're by yourself? Again, going back to
that principle we talked about? We don't want Islam to become like a
social movement for us. hamdulillah there are moments in
which we appreciate that social nature of our deen. But at the end
of the day, we can't live and die by it. Because guess what, on the
Day of Judgment, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he
addresses it. He says that you will be raised by yourself, you
will be by yourself to the point. Think about it. On the Day of
Judgment, you will be looking to the right and to the left of you,
and you'll see your mom. You'll see your dad. And you'll be like,
Oh man, hamdulillah man, my mom's here. She always got my back. And
all of a sudden, your mom's gonna be like, hey, so that good deed
that he did? Can you like a little bit away from him and more to me?
I'm like, Mom, what are you doing like this is make it or break
time. You can't be selfish like that. But guess what, on the Day
of Judgment, the promises I mean tells us that the nature of the
Day of Judgment will be so severe that even parents will be trying
to steal deeds from their kids.
And I don't want you guys to go home and like side i Your mom
tonight. We like I know about you. Right? I'm praying issue by
myself. And I know. I like don't do that. But the reality is at the
end of the day, this is the severity of the hereafter.
You will have to understand what it's like to be alone sometimes.
So do we structurally break down when we're alone? Or are we
together when we're alone? Sometimes, right? And so what's
called a rug back coffee enough. See cup, Allah says, remember your
Lord within yourself. You know what he says? While Do not judge
every minute? Only he says, and you don't have to actually say
anything out loud, even. You don't have to like, be loud. You don't
have to be like, Oh Allah, I'm here for you by myself. Sometimes
just sitting in silence is such a beautiful gift from Allah.
Sometimes just being by yourself is a beautiful gift from Allah
Subhan. Allah to Adam. Okay, now, I wanted to share something with
you guys, which is kind of interesting here.
That the soul right, bettering the self has to do with understanding
yourself. And yourself is very, very interesting. Because Allah,
Allah created you in different kind of facets, different parts of
you. How many of you all have ever like, you know, watch those movies
or those TV shows where there's like an angel on your right
shoulder and then like the devil on your left shoulder and you're
like arguing with yourself about like, what you should do what you
shouldn't do. In Islam, we actually believe that there's a
certain reality to that, that that that that stereotype that
exaggeration, that Allah to Allah did create you at different levels
of yourself, actually. And you're you yourself are supposed to
struggle with certain things naturally. And so to know
yourself, is one of the greatest ways to understand who Allah and
what your deen is. And so the soul is essentially broken down into
three generic parts of who you are. And now check, check how this
is going to hit you all kind of deep. The first that the scholars
they talk about in the Quran, they say, there's a part of you called
the knifes that is always inclined towards things that are bad for
you.
And by the way, you can't always blame shaitan your entire life.
You know, like that part of Islam where you're like, Oh man,
subhanAllah shaitan has got me shaitan always gets me right like,
no, no, you can't blame shaitan forever. And what am I teach?
just taught me something very fascinating where he said that,
you know, even blame is a side kind of, you know, effect of
trust, that if I blame somebody, I almost expect them to own up to
that blame. Right? So if I say, you know, well, this brother over
here, you know, he took my drink. Like, I have a little bit of hope
that that brothers can be like, oh, yeah, my bad man, that was
your iced latte. Okay, fine. You know, I'll go get my own.
Imagine Subhanallah imagine a person who goes through their
entire life hoping that shaitan will own up to all the bad things
that he's done.
Imagine going up to Allah on the day of judgment and saying, Allah,
I know, all those photos I missed from age 18 to 28. That was
shaitan not me.
We can't rely on shaitan like that, you know what shaitan is
going to do? Because you're going to be like, Oh, shaitan like, can
you please like, come and like, just own up and fess up to all the
crimes that you committed in my life. And shaitan is gonna sit in
the back and he's gonna say, I had nothing to do with you. I don't
even know who you are. This guy's entire existence is based upon the
lies that he tries to deceive people with? How can we ever rely
on him to ever come to our aid when it comes to the truth?
So the scholars they say, to understand that there's a part of
you, that is influenced towards your desires, is something that's
going to aid you to the better of the Hereafter, right? And this is
something called Nussle Amara Bisou. Okay, and the scholars,
they say that this is the knifes that overwhelmingly commands a
person to commit sins. This is the first type of knifes and the sign
that a person that has this type of knifes is that they willingly
sin. They blatantly sin, they remorse lessly sin in any way that
they want to. And we talked about this last week, by the way that
the Nuff said a motto just becomes more and more and more prevalent.
With frequency and consistency. The more that we allow ourselves
to expose ourselves to things that are bad for our hearts, our hearts
are going to forget what good even felt like in the first place.
Imagine a person who is in a room that is filled with complete
darkness. All they do when they look around is just darkness. And
the minute that small little sliver of light is introduced to
them, their eyes go blind. Y'all ever seen those kinds of like,
those those videos on the internet about people going into those
quiet rooms that are completely insulated with foam. Like they go
nuts after a while. Why? Because they forget what sound sounds
like.
They forget what it feels like.
So when we satiate that knifes within us that only wants to like,
man like I should, I should lie, it's so easy to lie.
I could easily just like slip in that little back bite, you know
right there. Like that little backbiting moment right there. I
could slip that in and no one would notice. The more that we
satiate that knifes the greater the appetite grows as scholars
talk about that. They say your soul feeds off of appetite. If you
and think about Subhanallah how how, how familiar and how parallel
the spiritual self is with the physical self
up person in Ramadan, I want you guys to think about this in
Ramadan, while you're fasting during the third 29 or 30 days of
Ramadan. The day after on either I can guarantee you that everyone
gets full very easily. Even though you have the spread in front of
you.
The minute that you Brittany, you finish your eat salah, you go to
that first person's house or you go out to eat with the family,
whatever it may be. You take like a few bites of food you finish
like half your plate, you're like I'm done. I know this for a fact
because after this Ramadan was over my family and I went we went
to Damascus. Allah preserve them. And we started eating and I was
like, it's a buffet, right? So you're like, Oh God, I gotta get
like two or three more plates after this one. And then we go for
a second plate. I'm like, bro, there's nothing more unappetizing
than this food right now. Why? Because your body was trained for
30 days to eat minimally.
Think about our souls like that.
Your soul when given the food, of desire, the food of shower, the
food of sins, the body, the soul begins to crave more and more and
more of it.
And I gave that example last week. And this is why when everyone when
when anytime young people, they come up to me and they're like,
oh, you know, like, I feel like what's like the job of like,
getting to know somebody for the sake of marriage. And I'm always
like,
have a strategy. Don't just wing it. Like, yeah, but like, what's
the harm in a text message? I'm like, okay, and they come back to
like the office like in two to two weeks and like, Oh my God, God
went too far. I'm like, Well, yeah, that's what the soul wants.
Because when the soul tastes a text message, the next thing it
wants is a phone call. When that phone call becomes redundant, the
next time it wants is a FaceTime call. When that FaceTime calls
becomes boring, not wants to meet up in person with friends. And
then when the friends become a little bit of a nuisance now we
want to meet in privacy. And all the sudden, what was something
tiny now has become a very serious situation. But that's the appetite
of the soul. Right? And that's your enough cell Amara Bisou the
one that keeps wanting more. So you have to be a strong person to
be able to kind of control that. You know that eating like eight
pieces of like chicken noodle is not good for you, bro.
But sometimes you'll want it the hunger of the eyes is real. So the
hunger of the soul is also real. So that's the first type of knifes
The second type of nuts. So this is interesting already for this
because everyone is going to feel this one. The second type of
knifes that Allah talks about in the Quran, is a type of knifes
called enough's a lo wham I don't know what that means. The word
lawanna means the one that is self blaming.
Like it keeps asking like why did you do that? Why'd you why'd you
cheap? Why did you lie? Like why did you do that? You dummy? Like
did you have to? Like why couldn't you just done the right thing? And
you're like sitting in your car at 8am before class starts yelling at
yourself. The guy next to you thinks there's like a gin
possession going on. Like what like well, this is your knifes a
lawanna because they say that knifes allawah Is the knifes that
itself regulates. It brings you back to equilibrium. Sometimes it
brings a person to sin Sure.
It because sometimes your knifes will make you sin, but right after
the sin that knifes a lawanna just kind of hold you accountable.
Hey man, why did you do that? And this is why by the way, Hassan Al
buslee He says that knifes Allah Juana is actually the knifes of a
believer.
Don't just think that in order to be a believer, you have to be
like, the best thing ever.
Because when Allah says yeah, you have ladina and Manu, don't you
think that Allah knows that every single person that he's addressing
his fault? It has faults?
Do you think that Allah to Allah knows things that every time he
says, Yeah, you have ladina Avenue. It's people that pray five
times a day gives charity doesn't look at anything that they should
look at, is good to their families never speaks ill word nothing. No,
Allah knows. Yeah, you have Ludhiana and Manu is a large net.
It's a large amount of people.
Allow yourself to breathe a little bit. NAFSA lawanna. Okay, but this
is the knifes that it will claim rahamallah Who says that the sign
of having enough. Salawa is precisely that when they commit a
sin, they feel remorse and regret. They feel guilt and they feel
shame. They feel embarrassment, they wish they could take it back.
If you ever felt this way in your life, know that hamdulillah
everyone's right now take a pause right now, if you've ever felt
that way, say Alhamdulillah right now Hamdulillah
that Allah has given me this has given me this mechanism of self
regulation.
Could you imagine if you're just robotic, and you didn't feel that
way? Alhamdulillah a moment where you did something a little bit
kind of, you know, not to Allah is pleasing Hamdulillah that Allah
has made you with a self regulatory mechanism within you
that says, oh, man, I feel bad about this.
That's what a believer is. Okay. And he says it'll claim he says,
they may even intend at that moment that they will never do it
again. But they might fall back into it. But then he puts in a
hadith where he says that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam
one time he said that if all of humanity was perfection, like if
every human being on Earth was perfect, Allah would destroy every
single creation of his and re mold all of creation to be one that
sins, but then asks him for forgiveness.
Which should now teach you that perfection is actually not the
goal.
Perfection is not the goal.
Have you all ever set goals for yourselves that are so high that
you psych yourself out from even starting that journey?
Like in the beginning of Ramadan, you're like, Alright, my goal is
to do two Huttons this month, and brothers been stuck on Alif Lam
Meem directly tabula rasa Buffy for the past two days, right. This
person was like, Alright, I'm going to do this and this and this
and this and because of the lofty expectation
You just don't even get started.
What knifes Allah teaches us is to understand that Allah does not
expect perfection from you.
And I want you guys to think about this. Don't you think that Allah
knows what you're capable of?
Don't you think that Allah knows that this person's capacity is
this and that person's capacity is that and every single person's
life is tailored specifically for them? Don't you think that Allah
knows that?
So know that Allah subhanho wa Taala knows you better than anyone
else, even better than you know yourself. Okay. And then number
three, the last one and we'll talk about this in sha Allah, this is
beautiful. I'm going to mention a hadith about this at the end. But
the last one check this out. Now this is the goal. This is the
knifes that's actually like it's never it's never always there.
Because a human being like I said, is not meant to always be there.
This type of knifes this third part of you is called knifes ol
motto my inner.
Okay, Allah mentioned this is just a refresher. Yeah, you have to
have enough so most of my inner it'll Jerry la robic your audio to
metal dia for the Holy theory body what holy Jannetty
this knifes most of my inner Y'all know what it means? It means the
one that is just filled with contentment.
They're at peace. They're happy with who they are.
They're not troubled. And check this out. The description is
Subhanallah it's incredible.
It moves by him, he says the sign of this knifes is exactly what was
just mentioned, this person not only abstains from sin, but they
no longer desire it.
They no longer feel like they want to do things that are like against
what Allah would like for them to do.
But it's not common sense. But they have desire, because human
beings are made with desire. But now their desire is only towards
things that would make Allah happy.
Their desire no longer goes against what Allah wants. Their
desire goes with what Allah wants, everything that they have in their
life reminds them of Allah.
And check this out.
Even though you may not and I may not have been at that status for
all time. How many of y'all check this out? How many of y'all have
felt spurts of that in your life?
You looked at something and you're like, oh, man, I remember when
Allah did that small thing. You saw something that reminded you of
Allah.
That means that a little bit of Neph Salam o to my inner, you
experienced it.
And at that moment, you felt this extreme piece within yourself that
you probably never felt before.
And you felt and you wish that you could hold on to it forever. But
you know, you can't.
And that's why the Scholars they say that nafcillin multiman inner
ultimately, can only be felt perpetually in Paradise.
Allah gives you a taste of it in the dunya.
He just tries to motivate you with a little bit of it in the dunya
y'all ever had those moments? Like when you prayed for treasure,
proud of yourself made good wudu may have gone to the masjid. And
you're like, man, Hamdulillah I could do this Muslim thing. It's
not too bad, right? But then like half a day later, you're like,
back to Zhang Li 101 Again, and that's fine, because that's what's
that's what sometimes is supposed to happen. But you haven't that
taste of knifes ultimate inna is supposed to be enough for you to
want Jana now. Imagine what Jana is going to feel like, imagine
what like just looking at people that you might not even like
really know or like and you see them and it just makes you happy.
Think about how much hostility people kind of keep in their
hearts. They just feel anger. Y'all ever seen people that get
angry just by looking at certain people? They're just looking at
Mohawk days, Ron, brother, he didn't say anything to you.
Like what? Why are you so angry? That's a discontent hard enough to
multiply into is the opposite of that.
They're happy, they're good. They think well of other people. The
next time that Muslim ignores your son, I'm at the grocery store.
Y'all know who I'm talking to? happens in my life every day. I
don't know why I really don't know why I'm like said I'm wanting them
to like, walk the other way. Mule soft Murphy talks about this a
lot. We're just we're just weird people. But you'll never have that
that feeling of discontentment in your heart ever again. Okay. So
now, I'm going to share a small little story and inshallah we're
going to end with a beautiful conversation together.
You know, there's a very famous scholar by the name of Abu Hamid
Al Ghazali Rahim Allah He
He went through like a very interesting like life crisis at
one point and I'm sharing this with you guys because I want
everyone to know that if you go through like a life crisis of like
the self, it's not like an unassuming thing. Like if you go
through like a crisis of faith or a crisis of like, you know, like
just knowing who you are your identity, don't think that you're
a bad person, some of the greatest closest people to Allah to Allah
have gone through the exact same thing. Imam utilizzati Ramallah
was like an absolute genius, like an absolute genius. He used to
mashallah teach used to teach at this, you know, this college and
Bill Dodd, and he at like a young age used to teach people like way
older than him. So imagine like a 20 year old, teaching a bunch of
40 year olds, like that was his life. Okay, that's what he used to
do. And everyone used to flock from around the nation, the area
of that time, they used to come to LA, I want to learn from him want
to learn from him. So you know, like that hype that gets built up
around a person's like, just kind of like a persona. Like, like
imagine like, if you saw somebody famous on like, Instagram, like
walk down the street, and like, it's done blue checkmark is a
follow them around, I don't know. Like all this, like mysterious
origins kind of follows them around. So Emanuel has that he had
that about him. People used to want to sit with him, people would
want him to just kind of bask in his just his presence. Until what
and you know, subhanAllah, while he was famous for teaching, y'all
know this, he was famous for teaching the purification of the
heart. So he would teach people about being sincere and honest,
and, you know, being humble and being kind and generous and
avoiding things like arrogance and ignorance and jealousy. He used to
be like a Master of Teaching, like the inward kind of functionalities
of the heart. And at one point, how many of you all have ever gone
through? And this is something that's very personal. So I want
you guys to ask yourself this question. How many of y'all have
ever gone through a moment in your life where you're just sitting,
just doing something that you regularly do in your life? And
you're like, What am I doing?
Like, why am I doing this? Why am I pursuing a degree in pre med?
Like, why am I doing this right now? This trauma is sitting around
this room right now I can see the faces in here. Please, I don't
want you to get to quit your careers tomorrow in sha Allah.
This is pretty motivational, not demotivating. But it's like think
about it. You're sitting there ask yourself, why why am I doing
biology right now? Why am I sitting here? Why am I doing this?
So he had a moment where he went through that line of questioning.
And the scholars and he actually writes about this in his own
biography, he says, At that moment, I was sitting in front of
a class and I was about to teach something. And my mouth would not
allow me to operate what I wanted to teach.
Like I was about to talk to somebody about like, the
importance of being humble. And like, literally, I went mute.
And being the person that he was, he didn't just think that this was
coincidental. He was like, this is something that Allah Tala
definitely put in my life for a purpose.
I'm not being able to speak because of a reason there's a sign
behind this.
And just like any, like, amazing person, you know, what he decided
to do?
He went and did Hutch. He's like, at any moment of like, spiritual
crisis is go to Hodge bro. I gotta get out of here. I gotta go do
Hodge, I gotta just kind of like, get my mind away, again, to 100th
important. If you have a moment of just kind of crisis, give yourself
a break. Give yourself time away, take some time. Don't be shy about
it. He went away. And after he went to hudge, he actually went
completely off the grid, how many of us dream is to go off the grid
at some point in your life? Some of my some of my, some of my
colleagues we talked about are like men, retirement sounds so
nice. Like the Clean Slate Ryan's gonna basically make like a bunch
of burner accounts.
He's like, he just went off the grid.
And you know what he did? Subhanallah check this out. He
told him so because well, I have to work for it. Like I have to do
something to kind of gain money. I gotta do something with my life.
So he takes up a position of custodianship in a masjid.
Bro, this is like, this is like Mustika money going to your local
Islamic center and be like, Hey, do you need your bathrooms
cleaned? up like nothing? Please put that put that broom down? Are
you kidding me? Like, that's what he did. But at that time,
obviously, years and years and years and years, centuries ago, no
one knew who he was by obviously just looking at him because
obviously no pictures nothing like that existed at that time. So he
said, I served in a masjid as a janitor.
As a janitor, you know, trippy thing. He said. He goes, I used to
literally hear the Imam of the local Masjid being like, political
Islam. Allah zali. In his book, Baba was said this. And he would
be like sweeping the kitchen floor next door. He's like,
and he said, Whenever I heard my name, I would Dart I would run. I
would run because I wanted to refine myself. I didn't need the
Things that would just like say sheet that Nestle Amara Bisou
anymore.
Because when you're around people that just gassed you up too much,
it's not good for the heart.
You need to take that broom and start sweeping, you need to take
that vacuum cleaner and start going up and down those carpets.
You need to take that that that mop and start mopping around those
floors. We have to be okay doing that. And you know what we're all
fighting and this is very hard. What we're all fighting against
here is this idea in modern day society that like some people when
you reach certain heights in your life, that you're way too good to
do certain things. Like oh, like you mashallah have this degree and
that degree in this degree that you don't need to do that stuff
anymore, man.
That's why I told the story one time a few months ago, that you
know, when people come to root and they're like, oh, I want to get
involved with roots. How do I do that? I'm like, so there's couple
of like Dyson vacuum cleaners in the in the in the closet and some
brooms in our, in our in our, you know, in our in our little closet
one closet too, you can just grab one of those and start brewing
there and I want to do more. I'm like, Alright, you're out. I'm
just kidding. Like, but but but really though, no one's too good
to do any of that stuff. And he said I needed it.
And that's by the way when he wrote his most famous book, the
book that everyone remembers him for a on a Monday and that's when
he wrote it.
He was leaving mopping floors.
Same thing with the profits or something. He was sitting in a
cave big enough for one and a half men.
That was it. And Allah gave him literally the greatest gift of all
humanity, the Quran, right? These aren't just coincidental things.
Okay, so now I want to kind of throw this question out to
everybody. Inshallah, we only have a few minutes left before we want
to pause for a moment and everything like that, but I want
everyone to Inshallah, take a minute, take one minute, talk to
the person next to you. And I want you all to answer this question up
on the screen. When a person goes through self refinement and self
betterment. How does that affect the other elements of their life,
not just the self, it affects their family, that affects their
friends, their work, their religion, et cetera, et cetera, et
cetera, how does that happen? And why does it happen? So inshallah
I'd like everyone to kind of turn to each other really quickly talk
to each other really quickly bring about one or two points from this
question and inshallah we'll reconvene and we'll give some
really practical tips to take away in Sharla to end our session
tonight go ahead Bismillah.
Alright inshallah rapid fire let's talk about this real quick.
All right, Bismillah Here we go. What do we got? Inshallah, can
somebody start us off with what we have here? What is a way that self
refinement can actually affect other elements in one's life? If a
person is in tune with who they are, and their relationship with
Allah how does that affect other elements of their being? Yes?
Okay, hum de la Very good. You start seeing the world clear,
right? Very very good. Mashallah. I like it. Very good. Anyone else?
Yes, go there.
Uh, like morals principles, mannerism, they teach on like
basically how to be a good human being. So when you like do these
types of things and you implement that in your life you have you see
improvement in like your relationship with your family and
friends and work and everything because you're just implementing
good and healthy mindsets and just being kind and being good. Very
good. You start seeing that impact that bought a car, right? Like we
talked about this a few weeks ago, and it was maybe a month ago, we
talked about the concept of baraka and how Barack has like
contagious, right? But when somebody does things the way that
Allah wants them to do them in their work life, Allah will put
happiness in their family's life. Right? We talked about this last
week, that was a famous scholar one time he said that I realized
the days in which I used to be very in tune with Allah, my
obedience towards Allah, I used to come home and my wife and my kids
would be happy with me. And I thought that was a coincidence in
the beginning and then I realized it's not that when I realized when
I give my time to Allah the way that he deserves my family
benefits from it. Why do you guys think that you know, even people
who Subhanallah sometimes because of certain life circumstances,
they have to be away from the people that they love for extended
periods of time, but they're doing things for their love for Allah
and the love for their family? Why do you think they have such good
relations with their family when they get back? You forgot you guys
were our ask those questions. Like the professor son was a busy man.
How is it possible that one, he used to go for expeditions right
he used to go travel for periods of time for the sake of Islam for
the sake of Allah and he used to come back and his family was just
like right there with him even though he was gone for weeks or
possibly months.
That's not a coincidence. When you do things for Allah Allah will
take care of things in your absence, right? Powerful Very
good. Anyone else? Yes.
While Subhanallah in the Halacha
Bayona in Al haram Beynon that when you it's a hadith by the way,
that when a person is in tune with themselves they know what things
they know the truth of the realities of things they no longer
confuse what is good and what is bad anymore right they realize now
like this is not good for me. When for so long, I used to think that
this thing was actually good Subhanallah powerful very good
yes, it was my god
you have the capacity or the ability to actually be a better
person to Subhanallah right a person who is not nourished cannot
nourish other people right Subhanallah how many times like if
we were to gauge like our lives in like a like a almost like an
artificial like energy like electricity like a battery? Like
how many of us would be very guilty of being completely near
empty yet still trying to kind of bring other people up trying to
help other people out trying to recharge other people's batteries
when our batteries are completely gone.
A Muslim a believer knows that they can't give any good if they
don't have any good within themselves. Right? So very, very
important point beautiful. Anyone else? Go ahead Thomas good
very good. So being a positive influence for the people around
you, right? Leading by example not having to lead by word very, very
good. Mashallah. Anyone else? Yes? Very good.
itself. So I feel like by kind of using the knowledge that we've
learned, the areas of focus that we're supposed to pay attention to
in this moment, for example, focusing on certain relationships
focusing on focusing on spending time with yourself I feel like
looking at a bird's eye view make sure that you're not
very good. Yeah, like understanding limits,
understanding your own personal limitations and your own personal
capacities. Very, very good. We'll take one or two more inshallah
anybody? Yes. Good.
pushes your dumpster
and then
like there's a stream below her that she should drink from when he
tells her to shake
hands
yes
Subhan Allah, beautiful Masha Allah, masha Allah very, very
good. I love it. I love it. Let's get him in the back row
controller. Good. Now Yeah, yeah, yeah. So
I'm going through something similar like this, like, the last
six months.
It is a little bit challenging at first because not everyone is
worldwide. Right? Like people have their own time, place of
realization. So, first, like, we might be kind of like the odd one
out. But like everyone says, like, as time goes on, and they see
like, the light, they read into the table, like, they can't help
but like, ask you and learn more, and then all of a sudden, they
start to
rub off.
As far as like friends, like
there's some that got
stronger, yeah, subhanAllah powerful, powerful, very good,
very good. And I also draw attention to how everyone's kind
of reflection here was a little bit different, which is something
to actually reflect about the entire conversation today, which
is understand that self refinement is something that is very personal
for everybody, right? Everyone has their own Avenue, their own routes
that ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada provides for them. Right? You
know, but as long as as long, you know, well may yet duck in La
Jolla, Allahu Maharaja, as long as you have Allah on that journey,
whether you are going through something serious with a
relationship or you're going through something serious with
work, or you're going through something serious with a family
member, well may yet Dakila your Allahumma kraja Allah will make
for you an exit Allah will give you a way out of that situation,
Allah will help you in a way to a new situation. So inshallah we
wanted to end with a very beautiful statement from the
Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam and a couple of statements that
inshallah back it up who wants to read this and even want to read
this real quick and Shama? English? There's no Arabic in the
Hadith inshallah. No want to test you guys. Anyone want to read the
English inshallah up there on the screen? Oh, I'm going to pick guys
listen, I got my teacher education degree. I thrive in picking people
Alright, before I go ahead, go ahead.
On the authority of
the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu sallam said, the strong believers
better and more beloved to Allah and the weak leader, while there's
good in both, strive for that which will benefit you seek help
from Allah.
If a misshapen happened to all you then do not say only
they would
rather say, either allow or my shop. This is from the decree of
Allah, and he does whatever, for a deed saying only what was the
very, very good, this is so powerful in such a beautiful note
to end with. I couldn't have said it any better. And no one could
say better than the Prophet saw some himself that when you go
through something in your life, right, that understand that a
believer who's on this path of Maha Sabha of accountability, of
taking into account of their development, they will have this
entire kind of trail behind them of things that they may not have
been proud about. But know that a believer also knows that every one
of those moments have low happened in their life for a very specific
reason. So when a believer looks at their past, they're not yes,
they might feel accountable for it in the in the means that I want to
now remedy it, but they will never go back and allow that to affect
their future relationship with Allah ever. Because when they go
back and say, I had so many years where I miss salah, they don't a
believer doesn't say Oh man, I'm gonna sit here and kind of mope
about Hi masala a believer says now that I do pray salah, I'm so
happy that I'm able to be a part of this journey. Now. When a
believer looks back and they look at all those things that they used
to do that may not have been okay with Allah Subhan Allah Tada. Now
they look to the future and they're present and say
Alhamdulillah I'm able to taste the sweetness of Allah to Allah's
pleasure. That's what I'm happy about now. And they are able to
say as the
Prophet Solomon says, God but Allah, wa Masha artha that the
believer is able to look with hindsight and say hamdulillah
everything happened to me for a reason. And there was always a
wisdom in Allah Subhana Allah to Allah scope that I may not have
seen, but it happened to me for a very specific cause. And you know,
just a piece of advice Insha Allah, I want to leave everybody
with here. By him, he says, you know, if you really want to be a
person of Maha Sabha of accountability, of refinement of
improvement, he said, he and this is a beautiful point that he
mentioned, he says that a true believer, they understand that
they should benefit from understanding about the faults of
one soul from the feedback of other people around them. To the
point you know, we're able to claim he says that you should
actually even look at your enemies and again, mind the word enemy
because you know, this was written a long time ago in Arabic. But he
says that a believer keeps in mind the feedback of their enemies
because he says, For a hostile AI brings out defect, it may happen
that a man or a woman can benefit from an enemy who reminds him of
his faults, more than from a close friend who may merely compliment
and flatter him and hide his faults. So a believer even takes
wisdom from people that don't actually like them. What an
incredible and this is why the prophets are some used to say, the
believer is such a fascinating being. They bring good from every
small part of their life, even if that part seems seemingly not so
great. May Allah subhanaw taala allow us to be people who are
people of Maha Sabha of improvement of refinement and we
ask Allah subhana wa Tada to allow Betterment to be a consistent,
perpetual journey that we're all in sha Allah on up until the day
that Allah to Allah calls our name and we ask Allah subhana wa Tada
to allow our improvement in our betterment and our intentions to
become closer to Him to be very heavy on the skills of good deeds
on the Day of Judgment insha Allah Tada and we ask Allah subhana wa
Tada to accept from us all and forgive all of our mistakes
whether they be minor or major We ask Allah subhanaw taala to pardon
them all. I mean, little bit, I mean Subhanak Allah Houma will be
Hambrick when a shadow Allah Illa Illa and Nesta for Luca wanted to
break I have a formal apology for everybody. I really, really
intended on doing the q&a today, but the conversation was so good
in sha Allah we will definitely definitely I will hold I will make
you guys hold me accountable in sha Allah Allah have an attendee
so food be like, please, please stop at like 820 Inshallah, next
Thursday, so we can in sha Allah start the q&a session at the end
of next week's session, which is going on everybody, thank you so
much for coming today. In sha Allah Muhammad will be in the
masala in just a few minutes or said I'm taking Rahmatullah here
but accountable.