Safi Khan – Soul Food For College Students Dear Beloved Son #6
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AI: Transcript ©
Okay.
Everybody. How's everyone doing?
Everyone doing okay?
Now that Malarib is coming in a little
bit earlier and earlier every single, day,
Obviously, we're going to
eventually make the switch, when Mokgrib comes in
at, like, you know, like,
7:30
or 7:20 that we're gonna start the session
inshallah most likely after salah.
But for now, we have a little bit
of time crunch in in terms of just
kind of, like, making sure that we do
everything before the time of Maghrib comes in.
So today, I think Maghrib's around 7:56
ish.
So what I'm gonna do, we're gonna do
about, like, 35 to 40 minutes of session.
And then, I really, really wanted to take
a good amount of time, like 10, 15
minutes at least,
to do a q and a with everybody
so everyone can benefit.
So,
we're continuing on with Ayuh Al Waleed,
the the the letters that Imam al Ghazali
he wrote his student.
And
in today's letter that we're going to read
and reflect upon,
Imam al Ghazali
he talks extensively
about the idea
of why we do what we do. Okay?
What is the purpose behind each and every
single one of our deeds? Last week, we
talked about deeds,
and the the the idea of deeds and
hard work mixed with the taqwa and the
tawakkul in Allah, that
a person
cannot just work hard, but they also have
to
be locked in in their spirituality,
in their ribadah, in their worship.
That one needs a healthy combination of both
in order for their blessings and the the
their hard work to truly pay off. Right?
And so today, Imam Al Ghazali, insha'Allah, we're
going to reflect over the idea of why
do you do what you do in the
first place. Right? Going back to home base,
asking yourself, like, am am I doing things
for the right reason? Why am I doing
what I'm doing? Are my intentions completely clean?
Why am I here in the first place?
Right? And he'll give us some really, really
vivid examples. And sometimes and you'll see this,
by the way. Imam Ghazali
he writes in a way that's extremely,
extremely, like, upfront and abrupt. He does not
shy away from calling people out. Right? Certain
times, you'll see certain authors who are like,
well, you know, it'll be best to avoid
this or be be be best to be
wary of this or that. Imam Al Ghazali
says, why are you doing this?
Think about why you're actually doing what you're
doing, and sometimes it makes the heart feel
uncomfortable. But guess what?
Always being, you know, super, super soft and
subtle and not being direct sometimes is more
harmful for a person. Right? I'm sure we've
seen multiple peoples types of people in our
lives, people who address things head on, and
people who can never really get to the
point. They have, like, circular reasoning when they're
giving you advice and never really tell you
exactly what they're trying to tell you. Just
to say feelings, they try to go around
in circles and circles and circles, and sometimes
that leaves you a little bit more confused
than you would be if if a person
was just direct. So Imam Al Ghazal is
a little bit more of the direct type.
So
he begins,
and he says,
how many nights, you ayu halwalad, oh, my
beloved son, my dear son, my student.
He goes, how many times
have you remained
awake seeking knowledge and reading books,
and you forbid yourself from the pleasure
of sleep.
Okay?
So
he says something really interesting. Okay. He says
that
you, oh, my student,
have been staying up nights reading and writing
and studying and, you know, seeking knowledge and
looking up things on Reddit and whatnot. Right?
And you're searching up answers to deep conversations
and very you're challenging your mind.
But then he says,
but you are forbidding yourself from the pleasure
of sleep.
One thing that I wanted to kind of
share as a beginning portion of this today
is
the idea
of that these are very lofty things then
that cannot be shallow
in terms of your life. For example, if
a person is doing something as pious,
right, as staying awake,
seeking knowledge,
trying to connect with Allah,
there can be no mistake that that deed
that you're doing has to be for Allah
and Allah alone. There's a difference in staying
up until 2 AM, playing video games, and,
like, hanging out with your friends and kind
of just doing dunya things
versus a person who's staying up up until
until 2 AM,
quote, unquote,
studying and praying and making dua.
Right? If a person is staying up and
just doing dunya y things, they don't have
to do it for the sake of Allah
They're just doing it to relax. Right? They're
doing it to spend time. They're doing it
to kind of, you know, just kind of
unwind at the end of a tough day,
a long day, a long week, whatever it
may have been. Right? So that doesn't necessarily
have to be in pure intention for the
sake of Allah,
but how foolish is it for a person
who says that I stayed up all night,
and I was going through books and studying
about Islam and watching lectures and, you know,
making dua.
And then it comes to the fact that
they only did those things so they could
post about it.
So they could, like, tell other people about
it. Imam al Ghazali says, what a terrible,
terrible transaction here. Right? And not only that,
what you've done now is, he says,
He said, and you have made
haram for yourself the pleasure of sleep. You
should have just gone to sleep.
Right? If you're gonna stay up night doing,
quote, unquote, religious things,
right, you might as well and and and
and you haven't done it for the reason
for Allah,
you haven't done it for the sake of
Allah, sleep would have been actually better for
you. Sleep would have been better for you.
Why? Because when a person performs,
when they're performative, they're not substantive. They're performative.
They do things because they want other people
to see them. They want other people to
notice them. They take that picture of that
book that they're reading, and they're posting it
on their Instagram story, and someone's gonna look
at it like, woah.
1:30 AM. This person's crazy woke. Right?
This person is fooling themselves.
This person's fooling themselves. Who are they trying
to fool? Who are they trying to trick
here? Are they trying to, like, show people
that, like, you know, hey. While you lowly
people are sleeping, I'm out here, like, grinding
away at, like, Hadith, man.
While you lowly people are, like, snoozing, catching
some z's, no. No. No. No. I'm out
here reading Sultan Naba. You won't even catch
me on that sleep schedule. Right? Like,
they're trying to almost convince other people that
I'm this type of weight.
And imam Al Ghazali says, and you've deprived
yourself from the beauty of things like sleep.
And by the way, this is why, subhanAllah,
I wanted to share this hadith with everybody.
The hadith of the 3 that will be
punished first and foremost on the day of
judgment is extremely eye opening.
Extremely eye opening. The first three people that
the prophet
he mentions will be punished on the day
of judgment are number 1, a martyr.
A martyr.
Number 2,
a charitable person, and number 3,
a scholar.
Doesn't that sound very, very, like doesn't that
sound very weird to you?
A martyr,
a charitable person, and a scholar, an alim,
an alima?
Why? Why would people who are so clearly
pious be the first to be punished on
the day of judgment? Well
and this is hadith Qudsi, by the way.
The prophet
he
says that Allah
he said that
when he sees these people coming up to
to coming up to Allah
for judgment, Allah
will say,
what did you do in your life? And
the martyr will say, I fought for you
until I was I was killed and I
was martyred. And Allah
himself will say, no. You have lied, and
you did, but you fight you fought for
your own sake so people can call you
courageous.
The second person, the charitable person, Allah will
ask them what they did, and this person
will say, oh, Allah, I gave you I
I I did so much for you. I
I I gave for your sake, and I
gave and I gave and I gave from
the the the the nam that you gave
me. The blessings that you gave me from
the, I gave for the sake of Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala. I gave for your sake,
you Allah, and Allah will say, no. You
gave so other people can call you charitable.
The last person, an alem, a person who
who who recites Quran,
memorizes hadith.
Allah will ask them, what did you do
with your life? And this person will say,
you Allah, I memorized Quran. Your words.
I memorized hadith, the words of the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.
I did this all because of you, you
Allah. And Allah will correct them and say,
no. Be honest with yourself. You did so
why? So other people can call you knowledgeable.
They can call you extremely wise and and
and and and and super, super deep and
connected to spirituality,
spiritually in sync. And these are the first
three people the prophet,
he says, they will enter the punishment.
Why? Because what you're doing here is you
would have actually been better off if you
were a layman.
If you're a layman, if you're a regular
person who didn't study Islam, you didn't give
charity, you didn't die in a battlefield, like,
you would have been better off. Why? Because
at least you didn't do those things with
the the the the false claim that you
did it for Allah, except that you did
it truly to show off.
And because of that showing off, Allah
will invite those first three people to be
punished on the day of judgment. Why? Because
of the loftiness
of what they apparently did and the lowliness
of
why they truly did what they did.
And this is why I tell people, you
know, I'm gonna be really, really kinda, like,
abrupt here and and and super, super blunt,
but this is why this, like, open up
TikTok and recite on on on the Internet
culture is, like, super, super dangerous.
I'm I'm real.
And everyone's so mesmerized.
Brother, finish the verse.
Right?
And everyone's like, wow. What a what a
voice.
What a voice.
The auto tune's in there. Right? Like, the
reverb's in there. Like, brother, do you just
sound like you're echoing all of a sudden
out of nowhere? Like, we hear all that
stuff, and we're like, wow. Wow.
But look what you're messing with.
You're messing with the words of Allah.
And by the way, no one's here to
judge you. No one's here to judge you.
No one's here to call you out and
say you're being insincere or you're being you're
being false in your intention, but
be honest with yourself.
Be honest with yourself.
Right? And this is why, subhanallah,
the the one of the greatest advices of
the ulama
is beautify for the sake of intention and
purity. Beautify your private worship as you do
with your public worship. Like, how do you
pray at Jumah? How do you pray at
Tarawih? How do you pray
at at Isha in the Masjid
versus how do you pray at home when
you're by yourself in your room?
Be honest with yourself. Right?
Are you being a person who is more
in tune with Allah when you're completely alone
with him, or are you this performative person
that does all these things? You deprive yourself
from sleep and you you know, subhanAllah, one
of the greatest things you can do for
yourself is be a private worshiper of Allah,
and you don't have to tell people about
it.
You don't have to tell people about it.
No one's gotta know that you're up until
1 AM making dua. Why? Because that's so
specific between you and Allah. Are there are
there not memories that you make with people
in your life that are only between you
and them?
Aren't there certain relationships that you have in
your life where you share certain core memories
with your friends or your family, and nobody
knows about that core memory except you and
this person?
How unique is that story?
How unique was that moment?
The reason why that memory is unique is
because the rest of humanity doesn't need to
know about it.
They don't need to know about it. Now
address and and and and try to make
that that that an archetype for your relationship
with Allah.
Yes. Will you be worshiping publicly at times?
Of course. There's reward in jamaah. There's reward
in, you know, attending halakat and doing all
these different things, sitting and reciting Quran with
your friends. Of course, there's reward in it.
But if that's the only time
if that's the only time I'm doing things,
and when I'm by myself,
the only time I feel enticed to open
up the Quran is if I can snap
a picture of it and put it up
on my Instagram story.
There's a problem there. Right? And Imam al
Ghazadi, he talks about this very, very openly.
And so he then he continues. He says,
I do not know for what purpose you
did this. He says,
He says, I don't know why you did
this.
I don't know what came across your mind
to to to to tell yourself that, you
know what? I'm gonna stay up all night
and, you know, study and pray and make
dua,
but you fooled yourself because you truly love
the attention that you would get from telling
other people that you did this. I don't
know why you did that. He says, if
it was for attaining worldly benefits
and securing
its vanities,
if you did so for attaining worldly benefits.
You know? SubhanAllah. I have a I have
a we
have a common joke that we make here
about roots. Right? Like, people come with the,
like, you know, isn't roots that place where
everyone just goes to, like, meet other people?
Like, isn't that where roots is? I'm like,
if you're here to meet other people reading
Imam Al Ghazali, you're really lame.
Like, you know, like, isn't that where everyone
goes to get married? Like, if you're getting
married over,
power to
you. But, like, that's not the most romantic
of places, honestly. Right? Like,
it's not gonna fulfill you. It's not gonna
give you, like, that that that that fulfillment
of what you wanted.
So if you are trying to go to
doing something, like, spiritual,
but you're trying to seek worldly benefit,
it's not gonna do you much good. It's
not gonna do you much good.
You're gonna pray and say, you know, my
prayer is also a form of, like, yoga.
You know? Like, it's really nice. It's gonna
get me in shape. What happens when that
salah doesn't get you in shape? Usually eating
pakora, like, 8 other days of the week.
Right? Guess what? That salah. Are you gonna
throw it out the window now that it
doesn't do any worldly benefit? No. Salah was
always supposed to be an akhirah benefit.
Right? That psalm, that fasting, people who say
that I I fast so I can lose
weight. What happens when you gain weight?
What happens when you fast all Ramadan Mondays,
Thursdays, and that the scale keeps on going
up? You know, that thing is broken. Right?
Like, it keeps going up and up and
up. Are you gonna stop just because of
that detail? No. You're gonna continue to fast
because why? You're fasting for the sake of
Allah. A person who does any form of
and
they have this front facing intention to gain
some worldly benefit from it, they have to
reorient why they're doing what they're doing.
I have to be able to tell myself,
if there was nobody else in the world,
no other creation of Allah
in the world, I would still continue to
pray salah as sincerely as if there were
a 1000000000 people in the world.
And this is why one of my teachers,
he always used to he's always used to
tell us and teach us. He say, when
you pray in jama'ah, when you pray with
other people,
act as though you are completely alone in
that.
I mean, how many of us are people
who, like, constantly think about the people next
to us. Right? We get so distracted in
our salah. Persons in front of us, we're
like, woah.
Nice socks the guy's got on.
I gotta do rakan this way. What's that
guy next to me gonna think? Right? You're
sitting in your your your dosa. You're sitting
in your sitting position, and you're, like, very
cautious about the way that you're gonna do
your. Right? Like, I can't reach my finger
too high.
Right? No. No. I can't be too low.
Like, that's the guy next to me is
gonna say about me. You're so concerned about
what other people are gonna say about you
when you're performing your salah that you forget
the main one who's going to be judging
you is Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
Right?
Ask yourself. Am I be am I impressing
Allah?
Am I making Allah
happy with the way that I'm doing things?
Forget about the people next to me for
a second. And as soon as you say
then you can say your your salaams to
everybody on earth, whoever you want to. But
when you're locked in, be locked in with
Allah
Okay? So he says, if it was for
attaining worldly benefits,
okay,
and securing vanities.
Right? You know,
he would say. Securing your own vanities, making
yourself feel good. Yeah. I feel more religious.
Yeah. I feel good about myself. You know
what? I feel more spiritual.
It's okay
to feel that you're working towards Allah,
making steps towards
Allah Allah loves those who are. Allah says
that in the Quran, by the way.
Allah loves those who try their best,
but those who try their best don't have
to tell other people about it.
Like, hey. You know, man? You're ordering a
latte over here. Be like, no, man. I'm
just trying my best, man. Just trying my
best to come to soul food every Thursday.
How big do we get it? Everybody is.
I'm trying my best to come to soul
food every Thursday.
We don't need everyone to know about it.
Come, enjoy,
be a part of the gathering, be a
part of the majlis, but be a part
of the majlis for a good reason.
You don't have to tell everybody you went
to the gym 5 times this week.
You're good. You don't have to take a
screenshot of your Apple Watch telling you that
you burned 700 calories at one workout.
It's okay. It's okay. We got it.
The the the the real people who are
making real changes, people can see that without
them saying anything.
I can tell this guy is working hard.
This guy's doing his thing,
The same author who wrote this book, you
know what he did for a couple of
years to avoid
the eyes of other people? He became a
janitor in a masjid
in which his own books were taught.
The imam next door would be in the
Musalla, like, yeah, and
he'd be, like,
sweeping the floors in the kitchen next door.
How weird is that? Wouldn't it be wouldn't
it be so normal for Imam Al Ghazali
to bust in that Musa, but, like, actually,
I know this book because I kind of
wrote it. So, Imam, step aside. Right? Like,
I got you. You got the night off,
buddy. Like, he could have easily said that.
But he you know what he used to
say? He goes, the minute that I heard
my name being mentioned,
the shaykh or the imam or the that
was teaching that class, I heard my name,
and I would go sweep somewhere else
so I didn't have to hear my name
being mentioned.
I mean, what's sincerity, guys?
What's sincerity?
You know, it's so interesting. Like, you know,
the human being loves being mentioned. Right? We
love being mentioned. We love being mentioned by
other people. Oh my god. That person mentioned
me. Oh my gosh. What did they say?
Right? We love
that. We love that feeling. Oh, wow. Like,
that's so nice of them. We like getting
tagged in photos. Right? We like getting tagged
in posts and all these different things. We
like that acknowledgment.
But ask yourself,
if all the people in the dunya did
not mention you, but Allah
mentioned you to the malaika, would you be
happy?
Would you be happy if your name was
being rung through the heavens?
Can you imagine?
When a person, by the way, is beloved
to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Can I tell
you something incredible?
Allah does not hold that love within himself.
You know what he does? Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala, he then tells the malaikah, the angels
around him. He says, you Jibril, you Mikael,
you Islafil.
You know, he says he he he calls
these angels and he says,
I love so and so,
so I want you to love them. And
I want you to tell all of your
companions
to love this person. So Jibril, alaihis salam,
will hear this command from Allah, subhanahu wa
ta'ala. Hey. Allah said that he loves this
person and this person, so we all have
to love this guy.
So he'll go around to the heavens and
tell all of his angels, the companions that
he has in his life, and he will
say, hey. Allah loves this person.
We all must love him.
Are you pleased with that, or are you
obsessed with being loved immediately with the gratification
of those people around you? No. No. No.
I have to be like I I have
to have a certain amount of followers.
I have to have a certain amount of
this. I have to have a certain amount
of people in my social circle.
Are we okay not being the most acknowledged
person but being acknowledged by Allah and his
angels? Are we okay with that? Ask yourself
that question. Which company would you rather be
acknowledged by? Okay? And he says,
if you're doing this for worldly benefits, securing
your vanities, it's status and position.
Right?
Feeling good, tahseeda.
Right? Are you are you obsessed with your
own status?
What will people call me? When I get
into a room, will people be like, oh,
man.
The Muaddith of the 2024
year is here.
Right? I walk in. Oh my god. SubhanAllah,
man.
He's here.
She's here.
Are we are we expecting that treatment?
Are we expecting it? Can I tell you
a story about Imam Abu Hanifa
One time anybody in here's parents won't take
them seriously? Raise your hands. Just be honest
here. I'm not I'm not I'm not gonna
grill you guys. Let's just be honest here.
K? Your parents, even if you're, like, a
full blown medical doctor, they'd be like, yeah.
Can you ask your friend that's a doctor
about what this diagnosis should be? You're like,
you're the one that told me to go
to school. I'm just kidding.
So, anyway, you know, sometimes you have the
story. Right? Parents are the last tool to
take you seriously. Right? They'll take anybody in
the world seriously besides you. They're all you're
always gonna be their baby, etcetera.
You're not so different from Imam Abu Hanifa,
by the way.
I know that sounds very funny.
Imam Abu Hanifa
one time and this is when he was
an accomplished
scholar. I mean, he was a Muhadid. He
was a Faqih. He was a he he
he was a he was a hafid. I
mean, so many accolades to this person's, you
know, knowledge. One time, Imam Abu Hanifa's mother
one time, imam Abu Hanifa's mother had a
question about some sort of, like, shariae thing,
like some sort of legal situation in her
life. Okay. Islamic.
And she asked her son, imam Abu Hanifa,
she said, hey. Can you go ask, like,
this slakshiq
in the city
about what his opinion is about this particular
situation that I'm in?
By the way, Imam Abu Hanifa was like
hudjatul
Islam of his time.
Like, he was the guy people used to
travel from out of town to come visit
and ask him for his opinions.
And so he's like, okay. He goes, I'll
go ask.
So he goes to the scholar, and he
asks he says, no, sheikh so and so.
He goes, my mother has a question for
you. What do you think?
And this imam, his face was, like, petrified.
Can you imagine? Like, I'm just gonna be
honest with you. Imagine if you guys have
studied Islam for, like, 2 years or 3
years. Right?
Imagine
Mufti Khemani comes to you one day, and
Mufti Khemani is like, hey. So,
Aisha,
what do you think about this particular, like,
you know, fiqh issue? You're like,
Mufti? Like, you're sick, stuttering?
How dare I answer a question in front
of this guy? Right? Like, you are the
person who we learned from.
And he go and and then so the
man, he goes so imam imam imam Abu
Hanifa asks him, and this guy, he goes,
okay.
You tell me. What would imam Abu Hanifa
say?
And imam Abu Hanifa goes,
my mother asked this question, and she asked
me to ask you, so I can't tell
you anything.
And he goes, sheikh, I have nothing to
say in front of you. Well, you need
to tell me the answer right now. I'm
literally, like like, I'm starstruck.
And so imam Abu Hanifa goes, if you
insist that I that that I share something
with you, I would share that the answer
to this question is this and this and
this.
And so the imam says, yeah. Okay. Okay.
Go home. Tell your mother that that was
my answer.
So imam imam Abu Hanifa goes back to
his mom. He goes, so sheikh so and
so said this and this, and she goes,
oh, I knew that guy was always smart.
Isn't it opportune at that moment for imam
to be like,
Got you. That was me. All me. Right?
Like, you should take me seriously from now
on. You have no idea what you're dealing
with. Like, he could go all in on
that, but he had to suppress his ego,
suppress everything about him, and say, Carlos,
I'm not doing this so my mother can
validate my feelings. And I know it's tough.
I know it's tough. Sometimes we work hard,
and we like to be acknowledged by people
around us, but we never go around seeking
that acknowledgment.
If that acknowledgment comes,
but we never make the makzah the reason
of why we do what we do to
seek the attention and the knowledge of people
around us. We don't do that. We just
don't.
If we're happy
if Allah is happy with us, I don't
care what the rest of people think about
me. I don't care what even my own
parents think about me.
I have sahina.
I have tranquility that I know that I'm
trying my hardest, and I know that if
I try my hardest, Allah will
reward me. And if somebody misjudges me or
says something about me, that's between them and
Allah
That's their own view, and I don't care
about it. Okay? So he says, if it's
to attain worldly benefits, securing vanities,
status, and position,
or or he says something really, really strong
here. He says
he says,
He says,
or to assert your superiority
over your
over your
peers
and
your friends.
If you want to be the most religious
out of your friends
and you wanna assert yourself as that person
in the friend group,
he says here something very serious. He says,
woe
to you, and again, thumma
woe loon lak. And woe to be to
woe woe upon you again.
Woe is you again.
Why? If a person
ever takes something as pure as Islam
and uses it
in a means to oppress other people,
I'm gonna say it right now, may Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala have
mercy for you
because you'll need it.
If you take the Quran
and you oppress somebody with it, if you
take a hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi
sallam and you oppress somebody with it, you're
gonna need the forgiveness of Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala more than a lot of other people
in this dunya.
You may as well have just, like, done
your own thing and been like a, you
know, a hadith person that didn't know a
a lick of Islam.
You may not you may as well not
have memorized any Quran or any hadith, and
you would have done better with that. But
you memorized certain ayaats in the Quran, and
you went around and you made other people
feel extremely bad about themselves,
what you were doing is you're using something
that Allah
created
to cause to be a form of peace
and tranquility
in people's hearts, and now you're raising people's
blood pressure because of it. How terrible of
a sin is that?
How horrifying of an outcome is that? The
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam one time he
would said he would say, al Muslimu
man salim al Muslimuna
min lisanihi
wa
yadihi.
He would say that a Muslim
is one who other Muslims
feel safe with
due to their
tongue
and their hands.
A true Muslim is a person who makes
other people feel safe around them.
A true Muslim is not a person who
walks into a room and everyone gets extremely
uncomfortable.
A true Muslim is not a person who
walks into a gathering and everyone feels that
I better be careful about what I say,
or I feel that that person is going
to, like, judge me or that person is
going to do this to me. Now is
there a difference in acting like an absolute
jahil or a jahilah? Yes. Of course. Like,
you should be somewhat conscious. Right? For example,
if, like,
a a a a a very pious person
walks into this gathering right now, we would
make sure that, like, we're acting properly in
good manners, but that doesn't mean that person's
scared for their life, that their honor is
at stake at this point.
Their dignity is at stake at this point.
That a true Muslim is a person who
never goes to a gathering and seeks the
false of people around them.
Yeah. Because I know this hadith, man.
You?
God.
You're like the opposite of the sunnah, brother.
Like, what?
Who gave you the the credit to be
able to ever utter something like that?
My teacher, one time, he said that
the the the test to see
how you're growing spiritually
is if you can find more mercy for
the people around you. You know why? Because
the more and this is actually logical. Because
the more knowledge you have, the more ways
you find for that person to actually be
doing something that's okay.
If you find some sort of part of
your knowledge, your Islamic knowledge that says, like,
you know what? Although this person may not
be doing the best thing, it's actually not
completely haram what they're doing. They're still learning.
They may be they may be doing something
slightly, like, discouraged, but, inshallah, we'll get them
out of there.
But, you know, like, the y'all know the
Haram police? They they, like, get on their
they get on their Haram police cars.
They put their haram police sirens on their
car. They go around Carrollton and Plano and
Irving and
Grapevine and, you know, Dallas and,
like, knocking down everybody. Right? Haram. You, haram.
Ticket.
8 days in the message. Right? Like, what
What what is this behavior, man? Like, what
is this behavior? We're going around judging sister's
hijab. I know that woman that got lit
up on TikTok that one day. All the
day I know this stuff. Like, you got
the brother this past week who said that
the most dangerous thing that happened is educated
women.
Same brother that that wants to go to
a woman only for his mother's appointment.
Like,
like, you you see what happens when knowledge
is, like, scarce?
There was a there there was a good,
I'm a tell you guys something hilarious, actually.
There was a good there was a person
that I know who said that we need
to do, like, a vetting system
before we hand out podcast microphones to human
beings.
Like, well, I I mean, man, like, going
to Best Buy and spending $48 is like
it's like it's like going it's like Texas
handgun licenses. Like, oh my god. Like, this
guy can do whatever he wants to do.
Licenses. Like, oh my god. Like, this guy
can do whatever he wants now?
It's so scary.
It's so scary. Right?
Going around just claiming that we can do
this and say this about this person, that
about that person. Right? Be careful about that
stuff. Okay?
Now he says something different. He says, but
if your purpose
he says, if your purpose is to
revive,
If your purpose is to revive Ihya,
the sunnah,
the way of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam,
then he says,
or he says, or it is to train
your character, right, to be better in your
akhlaq,
or
if it's to break,
faqasran nafsil amara bisui.
If it's to break the worst part of
you,
to suppress the worst part of you, then
he says,
He says, may you be blessed, and, again,
may you be blessed.
So ask yourself 3 things.
The things that I'm doing for the sake
of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Number 1, I'll
add a 4th thing. Am I doing it
for Allah before anybody else?
Am I doing it because I love the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, and I want
to follow in his sunnah?
Am I doing so because I want to
train my my my character, refine my akhlaq?
And am I doing so why? Because
I want to suppress the worst part of
myself. Those four things.
This is a great recipe if you would
like to ask yourself if you're doing things
for the right reason. Number 1, for Allah.
That's before everybody else. Number 2, I'm doing
it because I love the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. Number 3, I'm doing it to
refine my akhlaq, my character, to better my
character. And number 4, it is to suppress
the worst part of me, to train my
nafs to not go after everything that it
wants.
If you can claim those 4 things as
a reason to why you do what you
do, then,
he says,
He says,
may you be a blessed person.
Alright?
And then finally, he says something powerful. He
quotes a scholar and a poet. He says,
He says, a very, very,
you know, beautiful poet who spoke the truth
once said,
to spend the night awake
and weeping,
to spend the evening
awake
and crying.
He says,
for anything other than Allah
is an extremely,
extremely
foolish waste of your time.
He uses the word foolish
for a very particular reason.
Foolish. Why?
Because only fools,
people who are literally crazy,
believe that what they're doing
is correct for some odd reason.
You're a fool. You've convinced yourself that your
lies are in fact truth.
Your backwards is now forwards. Your left is
now right. You're believing the opposite of the
truth. That's why he says,
in Arabic means the opposite of haqq, of
truth.
You convince yourself that falsehood is actually true.
Right? And you've made a terrible, terrible transaction
here. And, inshallah, I wanna end before we
open up for q and a with this
ayah from the Quran. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
and so to Luqman, he says something very,
very powerful. He says,
He says,
these are the people, wamin Anasi, from the
from the grander scope of people. He says,
manyashtari
lahualhadith.
They made a terrible transaction.
Ishtira in Arabic means to, like, transact,
to buy and to sell.
Ask yourself,
have I made a transaction with Allah
that is beautiful?
I am trading in my sleep
to do things for the sake of Allah,
and I know that it's for the sake
of Allah. So when you sleep at night,
you feel good, and you wake up even
if you wake up, you feel good.
But a person
who trades in their sleep
just to grow their own vanity,
it's a horrible, horrible transaction for you.
A terrible transaction for you. Because not only
are you losing sleep by the way, Allah
says, what about sleep? Anybody memorize what an
Naba? What does he say? Wajarna
no makum
subata.
Allah has made sleep a form of
rest for you.
Sleep.
Enjoy your sleep.
Don't deprive yourself of sleep. It's not worth
it.
If you are going to stay up, make
sure you stay up for the right reason.
Because a person who takes sleep away from
themselves, and they're doing so why? Because they
wanna be called religious and do all these
different things, and they wanna glorify their vanity
and all these other things for their own
sake,
what what are they gonna do? They're gonna
end up missing Fedr.
They're gonna end up sleeping in. They're gonna
end up waking up and still feeling groggy.
Why? Because they know that they haven't truly
done what they should have done.
Give yourself time to rest.
Rest sometimes.
Stay up sometimes.
When you stay up, do so because you
love Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala and you love
his messenger, and you're trying your hardest to
improve yourself, and you're trying your hardest to
get over some bad habits.
Those are the reasons why you should be
doing what you do. Okay? So, inshallah, with
that, we're gonna pause, and we're gonna open
up for 10 minutes of q and a,
inshallah. So I want everyone to go ahead
and
go to the
Slido,
q and a,
portal.
And,
you guys will be able to see,
your
questions
or your your your prompt to to to
submit your questions
through this. So the the website is slido.com,
and the,
code you punch in is soul food. We'll
keep this code going for, the remainder of
class. So we have 10 minutes. So if
people wanna go ahead and submit their questions,
I'll take a look at these questions,
as they come in, and then we'll do
a little bit of kind of quick rapid
fire answering
some of the stuff that you guys have
to ask about.
Alright.
Okay. So the first question that I'm gonna
answer inshAllah is this one. Someone asks how
to change the topic during backbiting.
How do you how how can you be
a person who, like, quickly changes, like, the
topic of conversation when everyone around you is
backbiting? Well, I'm gonna quote the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam where he said that when a
Muslim, a believer, they see something wrong happening
in front of them, what do they do?
They change things with their hands. And if
not, they change things with their tongue. And
if not, at least they feel wrong about
it within their their heart. Right? So how
do you change the subject in a a
situation where there's backbiting going on? Before you
automatically jump to changing the subject, you have
to ask yourself, is that the best thing
to do? Let me assess the situation and
see if that's the best thing to do
right now.
Am I in a position to change the
subject? Because a Muslim, by the way, always
always, they assess in a situation whether what
I'm about to do is the best thing
for the situation. Right? And this is why
it's always dangerous as a Muslim to think
that, like, they're always going to be, like,
the main character of every problem solving situation.
Right? Like, if I see somebody doing something
haram or, like, if I see, like, a
brother out in the mall with, like, a
girl that I don't that he doesn't know
or that I don't know, I should go
in there and jump off the 2nd floor
balcony and just split them apart.
Right?
I'm gonna be that guy.
I wanna be the one who attains Jannah
because of this act of sacrifice. No. No.
No. You may actually cause much more harm
than you think. Okay?
So before you you you you try to
do anything, right, you should ask yourself that's
a hilarious so if you try to I
haven't seen that yet. If you try if
you if you do anything,
the first thing you should do is assess
whether
what I want to do is the best
thing for the situation in and of itself.
K?
So if you are in a position to
change the topic in a backbiting
kind of environment,
then what you should do is, honestly,
number 1,
either just praise that person, honestly,
find something good to say about that person,
or or
if you if that's not the viable solution,
then what you should pivot to is be
a person who just kind of stays quiet
or if you're in a position to walk
out of the room.
At the end of the day, if that
person's dignity and honor is being harmed and
you're in a position to defend it, say,
no. This isn't true. And if and if
you cannot do that, then praise that person
for what they've done. And if you can't
even do that, then you should actually just
walk away. Save yourself from the situation.
Allah's gonna ask you what you did. And
if you got up and walked away, Allah
at least you've shown Allah that you're not
okay being in a situation like that.
But more importantly, ask yourself what role do
you play in that environment.
Well, if I if I say something, will
my words be taken?
Right? Or if I say something, will that
person's dignity be even more on the line?
Right? Very important to ask yourself that question.
Okay?
How to stay humble and not think badly
of other people? Easy answer y'all is always,
always remember your own faults.
The minute you ever feel more, like, on
a higher level in terms of, like, Dean
than other people or character or whatever it
may be,
at that moment, challenge yourself and immediately remember
all of the sins that you have in
your life. I can guarantee you the minute
you think of your worst sin, that person
in front of you who you judge will
become lofty.
Guaranteed.
Guaranteed.
It's hard when you think so highly of
yourself.
Right?
Don't think so highly of yourself. Think a
little bit less of yourself than, like, the
status that you've, you know, self proclaimed. Right?
Very, very good.
Okay.
What if you have a parent with narcissistic
qualities
who is unable to take accountability
when they backbite about others or verbally abuse
their children?
May Allah
cause ease to to to to
to enter into this situation. May Allah protect
us from parents that are difficult.
In a situation where a parent may be
difficult,
they're unable to take accountability,
and they verbally are, you know, abusive.
1st and foremost, more seriously, I would 100%
say, if you're not a person who can
handle the situation on your own, please please
reach out for help. Seriously.
Please reach out for help. Don't don't don't
act like you can go do everything on
your own.
Be a person who reaches out when you
need to reach out to somebody. You can
only be pulled up if you put your
hand up there.
Right? If you reach your hand up, that's
the only time where you can be pulled
up by somebody else. Right? You have to
reach your hand out. In a situation where
if you have any sort of control of
the situation at all whatsoever, what I would
recommend for everyone to do is try their
hardest try their hardest
to
be the opposite of what you see.
Be the opposite of what you see.
Sometimes Allah
will will will will put you in situations
so that you will never become what you
look at.
Allah sometimes exposes you to difficult circumstances so
you never become that person in your life.
Learn from what is around you and be
the source of sakinah for everyone else.
Can I tell you something honestly? In tough
family situations,
I have heard from individuals
who
are they say, I I feel like if
it wasn't for me, my siblings would have
all just completely just left and disbanded from
this house.
Maybe Allah
puts you in that situation so that you
can be the source of sakinah for the
rest of the people around you.
Earn barakah through that.
Earn blessings through that. Never ever underestimate the
role that you play in your family.
Okay? So seek seek out, reach out, and
inshallah, never undermine your own role. Okay?
I'm wondering how to remember the things I
learn about in Islam. I try to gain
reminders often, but find I forget, and I'm
wondering how to improve and remember. Write.
Write.
Write things down. Please write things down. Writing
is one of the greatest things you can
do for your memory. There's a reason why
people wrote things down when it came to
the Islamic knowledge. Right? Hadith of the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam. People who use a scribe
and be a scribe for the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam and write down the Quran, there's
a reason why they did what they did.
Right? So if you have trouble remembering, do
what do what's most natural, which is write.
Jot down things. And, subhanallah, can you imagine
if you go back years after and you
look at your own notes, and you're like,
wow.
How special is that? Have you guys ever
done that? You open up something you wrote,
like, 5 years ago, and you see it,
and you're like, subhanallah.
You're surprising
yourself. You'll surprise yourself. You'll actually surprise yourself
how good of writers you guys are, actually.
Okay?
Very good.
How to know if a sister is ready
for marriage and if you can approach her?
Alright.
I knew it.
I knew it.
Usually, she tells you that.
But but but, seriously, if if how do
you know if a sister is ready for
marriage? I mean, you should either, you know,
formally,
introduce
yourself or introduce yourself to a friend and
say, hey. Can you,
you know, ask? And, again, every everyone has
different kind of approaches. Right? If you're a
more shy and you're a person who wants
to observe a little bit more kind of,
like, just kind of a little bit more,
you know, decorum when it comes to, like,
approaching in terms of marriage, you ask somebody
to to to to ask for you. Right?
Like, hey. Do you think this person would
be do you know them at all whatsoever?
Like, do you think they'd be interested at
all whatsoever? Yeah. Do that. The prophet
look.
Khadija
she asked another worker of hers to go
and observe the prophet
for a period of time.
That was her sunnah. That's what she did.
Right?
Just do the same. And and, also, my
my biggest advice to the to to to
you guys is try not to be, like,
weirdly, like, sketchy.
Like, don't try to, like, find out if
a person's available in weird ways. Right? Like,
stalking,
all that stuff. Like, it's weird. Well, life's
actually such a strange vibe we live in.
Like, culture, man. It's weird. Just be just
be be be honorable. Be an honorable person.
Right? Be an honorable, upfront, and honest person.
Okay?
Okay.
If I feel guilty about an action, does
that mean that I did something wrong even
if I thought I took the correct steps
and still feel guilty? No. Guilt okay. Guilt
is a weird word. If you if you
do something right for example, if you pray
and you go back and you feel guilty
about a better way that you could have
prayed, that's actually not bad.
That's living called nafsallawama,
the the soul that questions itself that it
could have done something better. Right? Don't think
that that's a bad thing. Now what I
will warn you guys against is living in
anxiety.
Don't be a person who lives in anxiety
about everything that they do. Oh my gosh.
Did I do that properly? I don't know.
Oh my god. Now I'm worried. No. I'm
gonna stress on out. I'm not I'm gonna
stress out. I'm gonna worry about what I
did and this. That's not good.
You can think about what you did, and,
again, you can't change the past. Right? Everyone
understands this. You can't change the past. The
only way you can change is do something
better the next time you have an opportunity
to. Right? So if Allah
allows you to pray Maghrib the next day,
what can you do? Learn from yesterday's Maghrib
salah. Right? Don't be a person who lives
with anxiety.
Live as a person who reflects over what
they've done, and everyone can do something better.
Can anyone ever claim that they're that they've
prayed their best prayer of their life yet?
No. There's nobody in this room that can
say that. Because if Allah allows you to
live until the next day, you know that
you have a chance to do something better.
Right?
So continue to think in that growth mentality.
Okay?
Somebody literally said, can you please reply to
your DMs? Thank you. That's hilarious.
Hit me up again, inshallah. I'll try to
answer you.
Okay. Very good.
Last question, and, inshallah, I'll answer some of
these next time.
What are some practical ways that we can
start spending the night for the sake of
Allah at the starting point like good small
habits? Easy. Can I tell you guys something?
Easy, easy way to spend a portion of
the night for Allah
do a little bit of dhikr.
Do a little bit of dhikr in the
evening.
Before you go to sleep,
recite your.
Read ayatul kursi. Do a little bit of
dhikr before you put your head on that
pillow. Simple.
It takes literally
10 minutes.
I know when we think about these things,
we think of lofty goals. Wow. What what
what part of sutul Baqarah am I gonna
start on tonight? Like, no. No. Calm down,
Habibi. Relax.
The other 2.
Allah
will assign an angel to guard you as
you sleep that evening.
Is that a small reward? No. No. No.
No. Start small. Start with your athkar. Start
with your thikr. That's it, inshallah. Okay? I
don't wanna make anybody late for salah. So,
inshallah, with that, we wrap up. We ask
Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, takes up from us,
and we ask Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, to
forgive us. And we ask Allah, subhanahu wa
ta'ala, to allow the people of Palestine to
be freed and to allow the people of
Palestine to be rewarded for all of their
hardships and their difficulties. We ask Allah
to end the oppression in Gaza. We ask
Allah
to allow the oppressors to be held accountable
for what they did in this dunya and
in the akhirah, and we ask Allah
to forgive us all for our lack of
mindfulness and thoughtfulness. And we ask Allah
to protect us and our families, and we
ask Allah
to continue to allow us to to taste
from the sweetness of this faith, from the
sweetness of Iman, and allow us to continue
to benefit from being people who call themselves
Muslimen
We'll see you guys next Thursday.