Safi Khan – Soul Food
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Alrighty.
We'll go ahead and begin.
Everyone. How's everyone doing?
Good. Good.
Ready? Everyone
everyone good with 2024 so far? Alright? It's
like week 3, almost week 2, week 2
and a half.
I hope everyone is in good health, and,
hopefully, everyone's
in in good spirits.
You know,
obviously, you know, this tragedy in Palestine has
been going on for
decades decades and, you know, the most recent
resurgence of it since October 7th.
Sometimes we do, unfortunately, as human beings, this
is just kind of natural for human beings.
We have the tendency sometimes to kind of
allow things to become normal, right,
if you're exposed to it enough. If you
see enough of, you know, a certain
situation unfolding and happening, it just becomes normal
after a while. I wanna just kind of
really
push
very emphatically
that we should never allow a day to
go by without making dua for the fullest
thingy people.
Never allowed the situation to become normal for
us. Right?
And, you know,
tragically, there are daily occurrences that actually disallow
us from making this normal. Right?
Every day, there's something new that comes out.
Every every week, there's something horrific,
that basically kind of is like an update
to the already existing difficulties that are going
on over there. Right? So,
you know, as much as
life does continue on for a lot of
us, we continue going back to our jobs.
We continue going back to our classes. We
continue to go back to our friends and
family. We just have to be very vigilant
as human beings, as Muslims,
to never allow ourselves to
become lazy
with our spiritual upkeep in regards to that
situation. Our duas,
our salah, our tahajjud, our qiyamul layl. Right?
These are things that we should keep on
just keeping on every single week. Right? Even
if tahajjud is not, you know, practical every
day,
make it a weekly habit. Make it, like,
a twice weekly habit. Whatever you can do.
Right? Make sure that you keep up with
this kind of spiritual,
the spiritual,
practice that you have in your life. And
again, at the end of the day, you
will see the fruits of this and, you
know,
we had that session, right,
in the I believe it was, like, the
end of December,
with Sami Hamdi, where he said that you
the the the the the sake of the
Palestinian people should not be,
you know, sought after
to see results in this dunya.
You will see the majority of the fruits
and the benefits after you pass away. Right?
And that's the hope for a Muslim with
anything that they like in their life. Right?
Your salah, your fasting, your dua, the majority
of your religious,
you know, efforts,
the reward of it will not be seen
here. Because just to be quite honest with
you, there are just certain religious acts that
are too beautiful to be rewarded in this
dunya. Right? When you're waking up every morning
for fajr or you're praying Ramadan,
when you are giving sadaqa to people privately,
is there really any dunya reward that is
gonna kind of amount to the beauty with
that that that which with that deed was
done? No. Absolutely not. That means that in
the akhirah, Allah will give you something that
you couldn't even even imagine that was possible
in the dunya as a reward. Right? So
just a small PSA to myself before everybody
else,
just continue to keep pushing. Right? Continue to
keep pushing. Continue to con you know, keep
praying. Keep making dua. Continue to keep being
an advocate. Speak up. Speak out.
We have to make sure. I mean, there
are so many
human tragedies that took place over our lifetime
that we allowed to kind of hit, like,
a climax, and then it just kind of,
like, you know, deescalated in our lives at
least, but it never deescalates for those people.
We gotta make sure that
this current situation in Gaza is something that
we do not allow to deescalate in our
lives. We have to continue to make sure
that it stays up on the priority list.
Right? Because to be quite honest with you,
and in a really strange,
weird, and fascinating way,
it has made us all better Muslims.
It has made our it's it's made us
all closer to Allah.
And
as
hard as that is a pill to swallow
because it took for this to allow us
to be closer to Allah,
we can't let go of that.
We have to continue. Okay? So
just a small little reminder for all of
us before we begin our session today. I
wanted to begin our session, right, for all
of those who are here for their you
know, they they weren't here last week when
we started the series.
We're doing a series called cultivating character
in regards to the 49th chapter of the
Quran Surah Al Hajjurat,
which gives us
beautiful life lessons
in terms of the character of a Muslim.
Okay?
And we ended last week with ayah number
3 that you see up on your screen
actually.
And ayah number 3,
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala,
he addresses
the people who believe. Right? He
says, indeed, those who lower their voices in
front of the messenger
those are peep who those are people
There are people whose hearts have been tested,
that have been polished with taqwa. Okay?
And for those people is a beautiful forgiveness
and a great reward.
Okay?
And one of the the the lessons that
I wanted to share here
is that,
you know, and we'll kind of touch upon
it today as well.
But a lot of people talk about, you
know, what is this big deal about lowering
your voice in front of the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam? There are multitudes of reasons
why Allah kept on just emphasizing this point
in the Quran. Lower your voice in front
of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. We
released the real today, sister Sunnis, Masha'Allah, released
the real today from last week's soul food
about what it means.
Do not put yourself ahead of Allah and
his messenger. It means that when it comes
to Allah and his messenger,
they are the ultimate authority in your life.
Right? What you think is
right or wrong
from your opinion, just purely your opinion,
your inhibitions, whatever it may be, like your
thought process comes secondary to what Allah and
his messengers say. Because there are a lot
of times where as Muslims naturally, like your
fitra,
your natural disposition, whatever Allah has given you
when you were born, it will align with
Allah and his messenger. But there are some
times where we do have parts of ourselves,
our that will actually betray
our loyalty to Allah and his messenger. Right?
And there are so many examples of this.
You know, think about yourselves this past year.
How many times did you know
what Allah and his messenger would say about
a certain circumstance in your life, but there
was a certain part of you that was
struggling with a weakness?
You were struggling with a temptation. You were
struggling with a desire. You were struggling with
a shahua. That kind of negated what Allah
and his messenger would want you to do.
And because you have that part of you,
it's important to remind yourself that no. No.
No. I am not the ultimate authority in
my life. And to be quite honest with
you, that statement might irk a few people
who do not have that spiritual compass.
I'm not the ultimate authority in your life
because secularly,
you're taught to grab the bull by the
horns. Right? Like, you're supposed to be the
one in control. You're supposed to be the
one that makes your own decisions. You're supposed
to be the one that doesn't let anybody
else speak for you. You speak for yourself.
And although in terms of dunya,
in in secular terms, sure, like, yeah, be
a go getter, go be proactive, be hardworking.
Yes. Yes. All these all the above.
But when it comes to your spiritual salvation,
you never wanna be the one
who ultimately
makes your rules.
You never wanna be that person.
And that's why Allah has lifted the burden
off of you from being the authority spiritually
in your life.
So whenever you have a spiritual conundrum in
your life, turn to Allah.
Turn to Allah. Turn to Allah. You Allah,
what do you think?
Would you be pleased? Would you be displeased?
Oh Allah, am I following what your beloved
Habib Rasoolallahu
alaihi wa sallam did?
Did did did I did I fulfill that
trust that you that you gave me, this
Islam that you gave me? I mean, I
didn't I didn't earn this you you Allah.
I mean, how many of us were ever,
you know, in our lives, we ever thought
about that? Like, what do we do what
do we do to deserve to be Muslim?
Like, I didn't make some, you know,
something no. No. Perhaps you be you were
Muslim because of the piety of a of
an ancestor.
Perhaps you're a Muslim because a great grandmother
of yours said la ilaha illallah,
the first one in her family. Right?
So you may not have done anything to
be Muslim, but you just you received it.
And this is Allah's wisdom, Allah's qadr
of why you received it. Allah deemed for
you to say and
not a person perhaps that lives across the
street from you. So if you have the
honor,
you have that honor,
Put Allah and his messenger in front of
you. Because Allah and his messenger and, you
know,
we talked about how Allah blessed you. Now
you talk about how
probably none of us would be here if
it would be here if it wasn't for
the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
If anybody has ever read any part of
his biography,
look at the tragedies he went through. Look
at the struggles he went through. Having trash
dumped in front of him. Having the insides
of animals
tossed on his doorstep. Right? Having stones
being pelted at him. Right? Having,
boulders being placed upon the the torsos of
his beloved companions. I mean, these things happen
to him, so we could sit in a
city called Dallas, Texas 1500 years later, and
sit and reflect over this beautiful religion that
we all have this blessing of being a
part of.
So anytime we say, Mohammed,
no one should sit
without saying,
oh, Allah,
send your blessings
and your your your blessings upon blessings upon
this beautiful person, Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam. Without
who? We would probably not even know what
Islam was.
It's because of a lot of his selflessness
that we're sitting here, and we can pray
Isha
in this country,
possibly.
Right? And so, you know,
why not raise your voice above his voice?
Because we owe him that.
We owe him that.
Lest you have your good deeds
taken away from you. Right? Lest you have
your good deeds become worthless. And ayah number
2, Allah says that.
Don't speak above the prophet. Don't disrespect him,
lest you have your good deeds taken away
from you. All the good that you do,
don't allow it to be taken away from
you. And there's a couple of hadith that
I wanted to share with you guys, or
one hadith particularly that I wanna share with
you guys that really illustrates this. And this
is found
in Sahih Muslim where the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wasallam one time he says,
Allah he says in the messenger of Allah
he said that a person, a man might
utter a word that pleases Allah even though
he does not recognize
the significance of that word. Didn't even realize
how beautiful that word was. They thought it
was insignificant,
but because of how weighty it was
on its account, paradise will be written for
this person. But then he says the opposite,
which is scary. He says,
He says, and a man or a person
or a woman, anyone,
might utter a word carelessly
that displeases Allah.
And on its account, this person will be
cast into the fire further than the distance
between the the
between the heavens and the earth. Meaning,
that, you know,
you could be doing something and Allah Allah,
he mentions don't raise your voice above the
voice of the prophet. Some people are like,
yeah. I'm just loud. Who cares? I didn't
mean any disrespect by it. No. No. No.
You may not have realized that your actions
were offensive.
You may not have realized that those words
that you didn't think were harmful or hurtful
were actually hurtful to somebody. And so because
of that, you didn't realize it, that will
be the word or that will be the
habit that will cast you into the hellfire.
So be aware of that. Right? And so
Allah gives us this warning in the prophet,
he shares his beautiful advice with us. So
now, we move on.
We move on now to verse number 4
and this is where we get to a
really cool part of the story.
So Allah, he mentions in ayah number 4,
he says,
He says,
indeed,
Those
who call you from behind the chambers, the
apartments,
the majority of them, they don't know. Now
what does this mean? Okay? So this is
a part of a really interesting story.
So this here is a story
that involves a group of people
of a tribe that
became Muslim. Okay?
And y'all know, when the family expands,
the tribe expands,
sometimes you gotta start dealing with people's quirks
and personalities. Has that ever happened to you
guys? As your friend group starts to expand,
it's not just you and the homeboy anymore.
It's not you and the homegirl anymore. Now
it's like 2 more people, and those 2
people grew up differently from you. Trust me.
I just got back from New York City.
Okay. I was visiting my in laws.
I'm just kidding. New York, May Allah bless
New York. I'm just convinced. I told my
sister-in-law, we were with her all week. I
said, I'm convinced that New York is not
a real place. It cannot be. It's just
not. It's impossible.
There there cannot be this type of culture
in this world. It's just nuts. Right? No,
but, inshallah, you know, it's a very interesting
place. Right? I mean, you'll you'll have, like,
you know, and weirdly enough, I kept on
repeating this because, you know, myself and Ustad
Abdelhman, we just got back from Umrah, like,
2 weeks ago or like a week and
a half ago. And so when I went
to New York this past week, I was
like, man, this is like overseas stuff right
here. Y'all ever felt that? Y'all run to
New York City and you're like, this is
like this is like right outside the Haram
and Mecca type behavior. You know what I'm
saying? Like, right when you leave the Haram
and Mecca, it's all these shops. People just
don't sleep. They just walk everywhere, run into
you. They don't care who you are. They'll
walk right through you. Like, it's like overseas
type stuff. So I was in New York
and and but one thing I realized, my
subhanallah, is, you know, when you have this
many people, Allah just begins to test you
to see how much patience you have with
humanity.
Right? Like, man, life is easy when you
live out in, like, Denton. Right? Like, ain't
nobody there. Your nearest neighbor's, like, 80 miles
away from you. You live, like, north of
DFW. You live in, like my my sister
lives in Saksi. Right? So, like, literally, we're
combining prayers when we go visit her. I
mean, you know, like, literally, like, you're you're
so far away. And sometimes in more remote
areas,
you're not really tested because you're not you're
really that involved with so many people around
you all the time. But when you live
in a very populated place and your tribe
starts to grow, your population starts to grow,
Allah starts to kind of, like, test you
a little bit to see, like, what you're
made of. Yeah. Yeah. You're a good Muslim
when you're, like, around, like, 2 Muslims. Right?
You're a good Muslim when you're praying in
that little tiny little masala with, like, 10
other masala.
Okay? But what about now when you pray
and there's, like, 500 people praying with you?
Can you, you know, can you be kind
to that other person there that lives completely
differently culturally from you? Right?
Like, I'm sure every single person in here
has stories and experiences
of walking into different masajid in their life
growing up. One's like a Desi mosque. Right?
One's an Arab mosque. There are Arabs walking
to the Desi mosque. Everyone yells that your
your pants are below your ankles. The Arabs
are like, what's the big deal? Right?
Everyone's, like, in the desi mosques only eating
zabiha only. The Arabs are like, what's up?
Chick Fil A's delicious.
Okay. Like, what's going on? Like, why is
this happening? Then you walk into, like, the
Somali masjid, Masha'Allah. Those those guys are amazing.
Right? Like, they're heart heart filled with beauty,
and then you walk into, like, the Yemeni
masjid. I'm not advocating for different cultural masjids,
by the way. I'm just saying
this stuff exists. Okay? It just happens. I've
walked into like, I've walked into like Bengali
masjids. I'm like, bro, that country is smaller
than like the the state of Rhode Island.
Like, what's going on? What's going on here?
Why why do we have a message that's
dedicated to these people only? But, you know,
we have these types of of of diversity
because, again, Allah is testing you to see
how you can handle the differences of humanity.
Right? And so this tribe,
they come up to
Al Hujurat. Now, I'll explain what a Hujurat
is because that's the name of the surah.
Right? Hujurat
is the plural of Hajjurat, which basically means
like a like an apartment. Customarily,
it's like an apartment that has like a
small little yard courtyard in front of it.
And this was actually to describe the homes
of the wives of the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. Okay? So each of them had
their own apartment. The each of them had
their own home
because they deserve their own privacy.
Right?
And, you know,
for all the Muslims in the contemporary world
who don't understand, like, oh, like, the prophet
had multiple spouses and how did that work,
and how could, you know, you do justice
to this. 1st and foremost, one thing you
have to understand is before we start asking
these questions, we have to understand who this
person was. He was the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wasallam.
Any standard that you have for an average
person know that he transcends those standards.
I mean, like, there's no comparison between him
and another human being. Right? So if there
was a person that could handle multiple roles
and responsibilities in a life, it would be
him. Okay?
And one of the most beautiful you know,
I've had this conversation with multiple people. Right?
They talk about, like, oh oh, like, wow.
The prophet married Aisha. She was so much
younger than him. You know what? The the
one thing that I tell people and there's
multiple articles. Yaqeen has written about this several
times. The one thing that I say I
don't have to go into a giant, like,
research paper kind of, like, you know, argument
about this. The one thing that I say
is
go ask the person herself,
the person in question. Why don't you go
read some narrations from
about the prophet.
Oh, he was her favorite person in the
world.
She spoke about him like
he was on one side of the universe
and everybody else was on the other side.
She would write about how he would she
would hold on to him while she would,
like, watch the Abyssinians dance.
And the prophet was not interested in it
really, but she would ask. She would wanna
do it. She would wanna watch on the
prophet. So are you done? No. I'm not
done yet. Okay. Cool. 5 more minutes. Are
you done? No. I'm not done yet. 5
more minutes passed by. Are you done? She's
like, yeah. I think I'm done now. And
later on people would ask, you know, what
was up with that? Like, you kept on
you kept on saying that like, no. I'm
not done yet. Why? And she said, Wallahi,
I had no interest in watching those people
dance. I was literally just enjoying being close
to the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.
So, you know, he was a person who
did such justice
to the responsibilities
he had.
And so, the Hujurat
were the homes of the wives of the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
And so, the story is
that
there was a tribe
that came to the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa
sallam. They were called the Banutameem
and they arrived in Medina
in, like, the late afternoon.
And, again, these were Bedouin people.
Y'all ever had, like, a Bedouin family come
visit you? Not talking about, like, a random
Bedouin family, your Bedouin family. Like, you're Bedouin
side of the family. Right? Like, some of
y'all are, like, Dallas people. Right? Like, you
guys go to Clyde Warren in your free
time. Okay?
Some people out here, like, visiting you from,
like, rural
Alabama,
some random, you know, cousins that you got
or, like, some random auntie or uncle who
lives in, like, some random desolate area in
Iowa, whatever it is. Right? They come in
and, like, Ramadan Mubarak, and you're like, oh,
god. Right? Like, they're here to spend the
month with you or they're here to spend
Eid with you. And now all of a
sudden, like, these people are, like, leaving glasses
everywhere. Your room is now completely taken away
from you. I feel very personally about this
because growing up, I was always a sacrificial
lamb for the family. Whenever somebody came over,
it was me that had to leave my
room for a month. Okay? Because, you know,
everybody else
apparently paid bills and I didn't. And,
at age 12, right, my my mom was
like, alright. You're going to living you're you're
staying with your grandmother. I was like, but
she wakes up for tajjat, like, 2 AM.
She's like, yeah. Maybe you should pray with
her. So
that was, like, my my role growing up.
And, you know, subhanallah,
when when people of different backgrounds come to
stay with you, live with you, what are
the things you realize is, man, like like
I said,
just
differences
of culture. You just have to realize it's
a part of life. Allah
mentions that in the Quran.
Right? That we've created you from men and
women, nations and tribes.
So that you may know one another. Right?
Like, you're not just supposed to hang out
with people that are just like you. It's
important to go out and see the world
sometimes,
man. It's important to go out and just
like men and and and and by the
way, I'm not trying to continue to like
harp on Umrah here, but Umrah is a
great opportunity to do that. Go to Mecca.
Go to Mecca. Stand in a line in
the in in Mecca. I said the word
line very loosely.
Go stand in a line. Wait for your
food. See what happens.
You be there until Fajr the next morning.
Like, yeah. I'm waiting in line still. Habibi,
like, 8,000 people came and left before you.
You gotta, like, running back your way through
that joint. You know what I'm saying? Like,
that's the culture.
That's just the culture. And so these people,
they came to the prophet
and in the late afternoon anyone know customarily
Sunnah wise what the prophet used to do
in the late afternoon between Duhar and Asr?
What did he used to do?
Yeah. Exactly.
The prophet SAW Salam
customarily
would actually take a short rest period
in the afternoon.
This is a part of his sunnah. He
just used to do it.
Again, he was busy in the mornings, fajr,
praying at night, sahajjud. Right? And then he
would
spend
being with the community, being with people.
Then obviously, business and work and whatever happens
after fajr in the morning.
So naturally, in the in the late afternoon,
the prophet would take a little bit of
a break.
And so these people, they come up,
and they come out to him. 1 of
the homes that he was in at that
time, one of the homes of his spouses.
And they yelled from outside, and they would
say, Yeah, Muhammad.
Oh, Muhammad. Come out. Come out to us.
We have questions for you.
And again,
they're not evil people.
They're Muslims.
They said La Illa Hillel Allah.
So they're upon the deen of Allah, but
they're coming to the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam
with this kind of like Bedouin vibe.
Oh, Mohammed, come out, man. We got some
stuff to talk to you about.
The Medina and Muslims are like shocked. Like,
how dare you?
There's a process here. There's like this respect
and adab that you show the prophet before
you approach him. But the Banu Tamim didn't
know any of that.
So Allah he says,
The people that call out to you, You
Rasool Allah, from outside of the chambers of
your home or the apartments of your spouses,
your family.
The majority of them just don't know any
better. You know, one of my my my
I'll tell you guys something really beautiful about
Islam.
One of my favorite
elements about Islam
is how Islam
will always address both sides of the story.
I'll give you guys a great example.
The topic of jealousy.
Right? Y'all follow me so far. The topic
of jealousy.
Islam
tells the person who is jealous,
beware of jealousy. Why?
Because jealousy
eats up good deeds like
fire eats up like firewood. Right? Because jealousy
kills you on the inside. So stay away
from jealousy. Don't don't be jealous of people.
Wish them goodness.
Right?
Want good for people. Don't want bad for
people. Don't always go after the material possessions
of people. You'll never be happy. That's what
Islam says about jealousy from that side. But
what does Islam also say about the opposite
side
in terms of people who have things that
they show off?
Don't show off.
Don't show off. Don't be a person who's
boastful.
Guard yourself.
Read your before you go to sleep at
night. Make sure you protect yourself. Right? Both
sides of the story. Because the reality is,
there are inevitably gonna be people in your
life that will be jealous of you.
So sometimes
even if you do,
you know,
do certain things the right way, Allah says,
no, there will be certain people jealous of
you. So make sure you guard yourself. Right?
Don't be boastful. Don't be gloatful. Read your
read your Quran before you go to sleep
at night. Read Ayatul Kursi. There'll be an
angel assigned to you that will watch you
while you sleep over through the night.
And Allah also tells people, don't be jealous
of other people, which is good upon them.
So there's both sides. Allah addresses both.
So here you see the same thing.
The first thing Allah addresses,
the people who call out to, maybe
even disrespectfully because the Madinans in Medina would
not do stuff like that. Allah says
The majority of them just don't know. Give
them a pass this time.
You know? And I and I and I
always go back
to, you know, the the the the analogy
of family coming to visit you. Anybody ever
in their life ever have family come to
visit them and they just kinda, like,
the brain was not processing. Right? Like, one
of these people gonna the 1st day they
get there, like, so, like, how long y'all
stay in? Like, just comes out. Right? Like,
you didn't think you you're already excited to
drop them off at the airport. I can't
wait, or I'm gonna mark it on my
calendar. Like, it's difficult.
It's hard.
But guess what?
Guess what?
Your job is to observe patience with people
that may not know any better.
That's your job.
Your job is not to assume that everyone
knows what you know.
Right?
I mean, think about it, guys. There are
certain people who come into religious spaces, and
this is, by the way, why roots is
and and and again, I'm so
grateful to be a part of this community
because
we function off of that prophetic model of
understanding
that not everyone
is assumed to be at the same level
of Islam as the person sitting next to
them.
It's not fair. That's not what it was
like in Medina.
That's not what it was like in the
prophet's community in Medina. Just because you're Muslim
doesn't mean that the person sitting next to
you, you this guy this person sitting next
to this person maybe, like, a half of
the Quran, the person next to them may
not even know how to read Quran.
How is it possible for me to have
the same expectations of both these people? They're
different from different backgrounds.
So for the people that don't know any
better,
Be merciful for be merciful on these people.
Be patient with these people.
How many times in y'all's life had you
had to hold yourself back because you told
yourself, no. No. No. This person doesn't know
any better.
I can't.
I can't go off on them. They just
don't know.
Right? They just have they they they haven't
been taught any better.
This happens with kids a lot. Right? Anybody
in here have younger siblings?
You wanna, like,
you know, like, you're, like, already planning, plotting.
Right? But you have to hold back.
You have to hold back. And this is
why parents, you know and and, again, like,
I I had a sister that was 5
years younger than me. Growing up, my my
parents were always, no. No. No. Safi, you
know better.
She's 3. You're 8.
Like, but she's evil. You don't understand. I
was kidding myself. She lives here, and I'm
very happy that she lives here.
It's so funny, man.
Sibling relationships are so weird. Right? Like, you
grow up as enemies, and later on, you're
like, hey. How's it going? I miss you.
Why are you moving? Right? Like, here's this
is a weird, big dynamic.
But
your parents tell you, no. You know better.
Why? Because that person's younger. That person's doesn't
know as much as you. You're more mature
than them. You know you've seen more life
than that
person. And this goes back, by the way,
to a very important principle in Islam,
And I want you guys to all be
very vigilant about this, which is
the more you grow as a Muslim,
the more you grow as a believer,
the more merciful you should be within your
heart to other people.
This is one of the greatest things I've
ever heard from my elders,
which is if you're trying to get closer
to Allah and you see yourself becoming less
merciful to people,
you're actually working the opposite direction.
You're not getting closer to Allah, actually,
because a person who grows closer to Allah,
they actually have more mercy to people.
Fabbima Rahmatimin Allahi Lin Talahaom, Allah said about
the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. It was
only because of your mercy,
did they stay with you,
that they didn't go away from you.
The prophet was the most religious person ever
to exist,
but people would flock to him. Anybody, like,
think about that. Like, nowadays, when we think
about religious people, we think about people that
I mean,
I I I I I, like, I tense
up in front of.
Like, I can't beat myself in front of.
I gotta, like, kind of, you know, like,
gotta, like, shake myself through this, like, you
know, family gathering because my uncle, he's here.
Right? He prays on time all the time.
Right? I gotta, like, make sure that he's
not judging me from across the room, this
Jahili kid.
Like, no.
No. No. No. The prophet
was a person
who people were comfortable in front of even
if they were sinful.
The most sinful person could go up to
the prophet and
say, you Rasool Allah, I wanna sit and
talk.
The same as a person who was like
Abdullah ibn Abbas, a scholar,
would sit with a prophet and have the
same level of comfort as a person who
is sinful. What does that tell you about
him?
The more close you are to Allah, the
more accessible you are to people.
The more
distant you grow from Allah, you'll also see
a trend, which is that you start growing
more distant from people around you.
You want good for the ummah, you have
to love the ummah.
You can't sit in, like, your on your
high horse and be like, oh, yeah, man.
Like, the Ummah is this problem and that
problem, and, man, look at these Muslims here
and that Muslim there, and look at all
this stuff that the Muslims are doing. And
who do you think you are?
Are you like a different, like, sanction of
Muslim? Masha'Allah Tabarak Allah Allahu Akbar Allah, like,
puts you on this No. No. No. You're
right there with
them. If you're complaining about them, that means
you're not with them enough.
You haven't been with them enough. You haven't
tried to be merciful to them. You haven't
tried to be kind to them enough.
Change that mentality. Right?
And so, he says most of them don't
They they they they don't know, but then,
Allah addresses in verse 5.
He says,
And if they had been patient
until you had come out to them You
Rasool Allah, it would have been better for
them. But Allah Allah,
Allah is all forgiving and all merciful.
So then Allah addresses the etiquette and the
standard.
Yeah. For the average person who doesn't know,
be merciful to them. But here's the lesson,
though. Now that you do know, it would
have been better if you waited for the
prophet to come out for to you.
I'm gonna give everyone
I wanna do this. I want actually, I
made it a promise to myself to do
this. I'm gonna give everyone, like, 4 minutes
to turn to the person next to them.
And I want you to discuss one really
cool, interesting prompt of a question, which is,
in this scenario,
right,
Not going up to the prophet, calling his
name, and not translate this to like a
person that you know in your life or
something that's been, you know, a situation in
your life. What is the what is the
thought process of a person
who may be told, like, hey. You should
just wait for this person to come out
to you. Don't, like, don't go you know,
like, don't don't transgress the bounds of privacy
and bother a person.
What harms
can that bring up, And what benefits can
it bring up to give a person privacy
and the space that they actually deserve as
a human being? Understand the prompt inshallah? So
I want you guys to talk to the
person next to you, discuss the harms of
infringing upon privacy and the benefits of giving
people space and respect and privacy inshallah. And
we'll discuss as a group as soon as
y'all do. I'll give you guys inshallah 4
minutes. So 7:55, we'll reconvene inshallah.
Alright. Inshallah. Let's reconvene real quick.
Alright. Bismillah.
What do we got?
Alright. Let's,
we can begin with,
we can begin with,
what are some of the
the,
the harms
of
approaching someone or,
infringing upon someone's space and privacy?
What are some of the harms of that?
And you guys can reference, you know, this
scenario or another scenario that you had in
your own life or something like that. Let's
get a couple of people to share.
Anybody? Yes. Go ahead.
Yeah. Okay. Go for it.
Shows a lack of respect. Right? It's like
my time.
My time is more important. I need you
to come out to me. Right? I'm on
a tight schedule. Okay.
Good. Good answer. Anybody else?
What's a what's a harm or what's like
a a con of a person who is,
like, not respectful of another person's time, privacy,
space, etcetera.
Yes.
You know something I heard that's wild that
kind of triggers my memory here now that
she said that?
I was speaking to some of,
like, you know, coworkers and people who serve
in the community.
And, you know,
a lot of people and by the way,
there's, like, a story of Ibn Abbas that
I wanted to share with you guys in
regards to this. But, you know,
obviously, this is regarding the prophet in the
Surah, but the the the
the the mufasirun, they actually mentioned that this
is the way that you actually treat anyone
of, like, knowledge. Right? A person of scholarship,
a person of, of piety. You wanna give
them the same honor as the principles of
this verse that, you know, that that that
this ayah covers. And so he was speaking
to me. And, you know, I know people
who approach, you know, scholars and, you know,
imams and, you know, like, questions, you know,
personal questions, heavy questions.
And, you know, there's this common narrative and
stereotype like, god. That dude never gets back
to me, man. Like,
just, like, takes days. Right? Like, I gotta
wait, like, a week before this guy gets
back to me. I'm so tired of this,
like, celebrity Sheikh culture, bro. Like like, they
never respond. They just think they're too good
to us. You know? Like, I was having
a conversation with an imam
one time, and he and I were kinda
going back on this. And he was saying
that,
well, Laihi, if people just had a little
bit more of me, like good assumption of
me, they would learn
that the reason why I never answer heavy
questions the moment that I get them is
because I think it's disrespectful
to not think about their question for at
least a 24 hour period
before I formulate my thought.
Isn't that crazy?
So this person may be sitting here like,
dang, man. Come on. Right? Like, I got
things to do.
But the person who they were approaching
had so much, you know,
as an honor for them that they didn't
just wanna kind of give them, like, a
cheap answer. So they're like, let me think
about this.
And by the way, if any of you
guys know me, some people have, like, maybe
asked questions or approached me with certain social,
spiritual, whatever issues.
You all know a 100% that I audio
note back. Right? Like, I that I don't
text. Usually, I audio back. Why? Because I
and I always share that with people. I
was like, I feel like text doesn't do
justice to the to the to the answer.
You can misread it. It doesn't really, like,
translate well over words. Like, let me, like,
share you, like, like, an emotion. Right? Like,
because sometimes when you hear a voice, there's
an emotion attached to it, not just something
you can read on like a like a
like a like an LED screen. And so,
subhanallah, what she said was powerful that
you might not actually get what you want.
Like, you're approaching somebody, like, hey, man. Come
on. Like, I got I I gotta I
gotta go. I need something from you quick.
And that person's like, well, like, you're rushing
me. Right? Like, I don't I can't give
you what you're asking for because you're not
even giving me enough time. So it's powerful.
Very, very powerful. Very good. Let's get an
let's get another person to share a, a
setback, alright, of a person who doesn't appreciate
privacy and yes.
A bad first impression.
Very good. Yeah. Or, like, the first time
you meet somebody
and you're rushing them by the way, you
know, subhanAllah, there's an entire hadith of the
prophet
that talks about 2 characteristics that he loves,
And one of them is a characteristic that
is called alhelm in Arabic.
And alhelm
means not being hasty,
being forbearing,
being patience and gracious with your time,
not seeking things back immediately.
And by the way, I'll tell you something
that's kinda fascinating here.
Weirdly enough,
the same way
that we treat people
with our hastiness
sometimes translates over to the way we treat
Allah.
Like, when we want, like, our text messages
responded to right away, when we want our
emails responded to right away from, like, our
work or school, whatever it is, when we
want, like, our DMs responded right away, sometimes
when we make dua and, like, we don't
see
results right away, we're like, same thing. Right?
Why is this dua taking so long?
Because I I expedite it, man. Like, I
did things right. Like, why is this du'a
taking so long for me to get back
to? And and and you think to yourself,
man, subhanallah,
I just
translated a habit that I have with people
over to Allah.
And that's where, subhanAllah, you take it to
another level of danger,
which is with people, subhanAllah, you know, like,
you can ask for forgiveness and you can
make it up. But with Allah, now you're
affecting your relationship with the way that you
see your creator.
You're robbing yourself. Right? So first impression, powerful
answer. Okay? Alright. Anybody else?
Yes?
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Absolutely. And you give a very practical example.
Right? Like, if you have women in the
house, you know, maybe, you know, people who
are who are guests or cousins, whatever it
is maybe, and you need to give them
time. Right? Give them time to kind of
make sure that they're they're they're they're they're
comfortable
before you enter. Right? It could harm you.
And again, at the end of the day,
Allah will ask you, why did you infringe
on their their their time and their privacy?
Right? Couldn't you have given them 10 seconds?
Could you have given them 20 seconds, 1
minute? Is that too crazy of your time?
One minute is not that long when you're
scrolling on TikTok.
You do that for about 50 minutes straight,
but now all of a sudden 30 seconds
to you is, like, yomulkayama?
Took 55 years? Like, what's going on? Right?
So
powerful. Right? Very, very powerful. Now let's switch
over to the other side.
What are the benefits,
right, of observing
proper etiquette and manners when it comes to
space, privacy,
and time, etcetera. Anybody wanna share? Yes.
Yes. Very good. You are able, she said,
You are able to set healthy boundaries with
the people that you're around. Right?
You understand
that everybody
has
things that they're going through in their life.
And in in in accordance to the Surah
by the way,
people who used to just see the prophet
as, like, a Muslim resource,
they forget that he had a daughter by
the name of Fatima.
They forget that he had a wife by
the name of Aisha.
They forget that he had moments in his
home that were private.
You rob yourself of
understanding
that people have private lives.
Maybe they're doing something
that they just need privacy for. Right? They're
resting.
They're just spending time alone.
Like, this is stuff that you like, like
and and and what happens is and going
back to the the what we just asked,
like, you know, where the harms, you're basically
assuming the worst of that person.
If, like I'm sorry, Habibi. No one is,
like, on their phone waiting for you to
please. I cannot wait till this person texts
me so I can get back to them
right away.
No one's doing that.
No one's doing that. Some people I mean,
and I I've had people come up to
me. They're like, oh my god. I thought
this was my friend. I'm like, I really
needed something. And she basically ghosted me for,
like, 5 hours of the night when I
really really needed her about something serious from
my life. I said, how do you know?
How do you know that she wasn't going
through, like, a family emergency at that moment?
How do you know that she wasn't catching
up on 5 hours of sleep because she
only slept for 3 hours the past 2
days?
How do you know that maybe Aruz, protect
her? How do you know that she didn't
just get into, like, an accident? Or how
do you know that she didn't go through
something traumatic just, like, while you while you
were sitting here assuming that, oh, yeah. She's
just purposely ignoring me.
Right? Or, yeah, he's just like a person
who ignores. He never gets back to people
on time. How do you know that that
person is not going through something? And then
on the day of judgment, when you finally
find out the truth,
you are the person who's gonna look like
you have egg on your face because at
that moment, Allah will tell you, yeah. You
know those 5 hours where you were just
assuming the absolute worst of that friend that
you had, that so called friend that you
called a friend?
Yeah. That person was actually spending time with
their mother because his mother or her mother
was not feeling that well that night.
So they wanted to put their phone away
and just spend some quality time with their
parents.
And you're sitting over here saying, oh, how
bad of a friend this person is. In
fact, this person was actually gaining Jannah
while you were thinking horribly of them. So,
Gotta protect ourselves. Very good. Anybody else?
Another pro. Yes.
Elaborate a little bit.
Yes. Can I respect that? Yes.
Yep.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Putting that respect
on
each party. Right? You guys understand there's a
process. There's manners. And by the way, that
was one of the reflections that I actually
wrote down so I didn't forget is that
Islamically,
it's not about what all the time. It's
about how.
I mean, these people may have to actually,
subhanallah, we think about it. The people of
the Banu Tamim tribe that came to the
prophet, you Muhammad, you Muhammad, come and tell
us about so and so and such and
such. They may have been asking about something
beautiful.
They've been they may have been asking the
prophet, how do you pray to Hajjood?
They have they may have been asking the
prophet, oh,
how do you pay how do you pay
zakah? How do you perform Hajj?
All these questions are incredible questions. Right? Things
that will lead to people's Jannah.
But
the manner of how you ask can actually
change the quality of that question.
Right?
And think about that. Right? There are so
many ways
that you can apply this lesson in Islam.
It's not about what you're doing. It's about
how you're doing it. A person can be
sitting here at soul food
and taking in
reflections and knowledge and, you know,
beautiful lessons from the Quran, but
they go home and they use it as
a mechanism to put other people down.
And the other person who came into the
exact same thing could be going home and
jotting down notes for themselves to reflect on
for that entire week and not really, like,
pushing it at anybody else's face. Those 2
people did seemingly the same thing that night,
but 2 completely
different results because of how they did it
and the intention they had behind it.
Does that make sense to everybody? Something really
interesting to think about. Okay? I wanted to
share just one small story before we, inshallah,
wrap up and head out for Isha. I
don't want anyone to be late for Isha.
There was a beautiful story here that kind
of, you know, attributed to this verse specifically
right here. That perhaps, it would have been
better for them, you know, had they waited
for the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam to
come out to them,
you know,
And so
there's a story of, you know, Ibn Abbas
radiAllahu an. He was the cousin of the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. And so ibn
Abbas radiallahu an,
he was a very curious
Sahabi. Right? He was a very, like, student
oriented Sahabi. He would always, like, kinda soak
up knowledge from everyone around him. He was
younger. Okay? He was younger than a lot
of the companions. And so whenever he wanted
to inquire about any hadith or any sunnah
or any whatever the prophet
he would go to like a more knowledgeable
companion and he would go to his house.
And the story actually says, ibn Abbas, he
goes, and when I used to go to
their houses,
I used to just, like, sit in their
driveway.
So some of y'all are thinking, like, nest
camera, like, creepy,
but, like, obviously,
no technology back then. No one knew he
was out there. He was just waiting in
the road. Okay?
And he said, I would wait there until
the more knowledgeable Sahabi
would come out himself.
And so when he and when he would
come out on his own, he said, I
had moments
where,
you know, they would ask me, oh, ibn
Abbas,
oh, cousin of the prophet. They, by the
way, would use that phrase. What does that
mean? Why would they use that phrase to
to to to to call out to him?
Why would they say, oh, cousin of the
prophet? Why wouldn't they say, even Abbas?
They would say, oh, cousin, because you're so
close to the prophet. You're like his family
member. If anyone could knock on my door,
it's you. Right? Like, you're asking about something
that your uncle said.
Like, that's like that's like like that's like
a son
going to, like, his aunt's house waiting in
her courtyard or, like, her yard and, like,
waiting to ask her a question about his
mother. She's, like, if anyone has the right
to ask me about your mom, it's
you. Right?
So they would tell him, oh, Ibn Abbas,
if there's anybody you're the cousin of the
prophet,
he said, you're the cousin of Allah's Messenger.
Why did you not knock at the door
and inform me that you were here?
And so, Ibn Abbas radiAllahu ta'ala Anhu, he
would say,
a scholar in his community or a pious
person in his community is like a prophet,
and Allah has directed us
that we should wait until the prophet, sallallahu
alaihi wasallam, would come out on his own
with his time to address us,
and he references aya.
And so,
this is so powerful.
It teaches us so many beautiful depths of
lessons
of just our own
behavior
with our surroundings.
Don't assume that you're the most important person
in the world.
Don't assume that other people's lives are on
your watch.
Don't assume the worst of somebody when they
don't get back to you right away.
Rather as a Muslim,
understand
that there is a process,
an etiquette,
a protocol
to how we handle ourselves. And by the
way, one of the most incredible things that
it says here in verse number 5 that
I want you guys to take note to
take note of is
that
it says,
lakana
khayron lahum.
It would have been better for them.
Better how?
Better in the dunya and better in the
akhirah.
Because if they had waited for the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, in terms of dunya,
he would have actually come out to them.
He would have been ready for their question.
He would have been in a better mood
because he could have possibly been well rested.
It would have been better adab in the
dunya for them to actually wait for him.
And in the akhirah,
you just made Allah happy because of the
way you treated his messenger.
It's both.
It's both.
Don't think that any moral
ethical
manner
that you observe in this dunya as a
Muslim is just dunya.
When you're nice to a person, oh, you
will be rewarded in the akhirah.
When you forgive a person, you'll be forgiven
in the akhirah.
When you are
good thinking and well wishing of a person,
Allah will just
beautifully gloss by your sins in the akhirah.
It always has a reflective
element,
the way you handle your dunya and the
way that you will see it manifest in
the Akhra.
So with that InshaAllah, we ask Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala to make us of the people
who observe the mannerisms that the prophet salallahu
alaihi wa sallam taught us. And we ask
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala to never allow us
to fall into the traps of Shaiban
thinking that we're more important than everybody else
around us. We ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
to protect us from arrogance. We ask
Allah to protect us from a high ego.
We ask Allah
to protect us from ill manners. We ask
Allah
to give us friendships and relationships in this
dunya like the relationships of the prophet sallallahu
alayhi wasallam had with the sahaba. We ask
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to free the people
of Palestine. We ask
Allah to replace the homes that they lost
with homes in paradise. We ask Allah
to allow their children to carry them into
Jannah and Yom Alekhra. We ask Allah
to end the occupation in Gaza. We ask
Allah to reward these people with the highest
levels of Jannah, And we ask Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala to allow us to benefit from
their iman. And we ask Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala to accept from all of our goodness
and forgive us for all of our mistakes.
We will see you guys next Thursday,
for the next session. Stay tuned. Next session,
we're about to get into the real interpersonal
stuff
in So next week is gonna be super
super interpersonal. We'll see you all insha Allah.
Isha is in the masjid, in the Quran
prayer hall at 8:15. So insha Allah, if
everyone wants to go over there to pray
their salah and jamaah, it'll be hosted there.
Take it easy.