Channel: Riad Ouarzazi
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the Honister No one asked us for whenever we let him show that and we see them we say yeah Marina may have the level for Lambo Villa home or your bill for the Harrier why should that alert you know hang on my wife devilishly killer worship, Mohammed Abdul Rasul of Allah you Hola Hola Hola. Hola como la welcome over a year como
como se immunogenicity Mazda was a lot the other lady Gemma and if he had waited Mubarak era la de
La Villa Illa Allah
there's a men
who divorced five wives in one minute.
Not four, five
Do you know how he did that?
How can you divorce five wives in one minute?
I'll tell you inshallah, but not now.
I tell you towards the end of this topic of this talk.
As you heard the ingredients of a successful
marriage, actually I call it ocean of love. Mahalo.
This is the My name that I chose or the the title that I chose for this topic. But
the ocean of love we tend to feel shy talking about love.
Like the mother said, you know love maybe mentor women which is totally wrong.
If not famous Natalie explains it beautifully.
Given this description of love,
then you said there are two types of love love with is a shallow love and hate and love. Unfortunately, when we hear about love, we tend to think of Isla Elena
habla Romeo Juliet, right? Thinking of love, or maybe those inappropriate love that gets built. When people will know they try to chat on MSN. And then they develop this kind of love, and they come to your show help. I need to get married now because there's love involved. But my parents are against this marriage. So chef, is there any federal law? And I'm telling you, this is serious. Is there any federal law whereby I can marry the one that I love through MSN? The one that I love
without the consent of the parents?
And they're asking me this question. So you want me to perform this Nika without the approval of the parents? Yes. Is there any federal
in there any opinion Imam Abu hanifa can be Hanafi or Shafi I can be sure for your humble you can just give me a fatwa. This is the type of hair on love that we're talking about. Today we're going to talk about the header love have been Hillel
as the ocean woman is he and Harada come in and physical address as well. It is cuando la jolla, which are anabaena commodity animasi signs
that he has put amongst you love and mercy
that you may dwell in tranquility.
Let us know
that you may dwell in tranquility and and he says that then he has put amongst you love and and mercy. He said love first and mercy and my word that
the meaning of my word here is love.
It is the ingredient that is needed for the successful marriage. Very soon inshallah tada shortly I'll make you wear your aprons and I will take you to a kitchen called the kitchen of love.
To talk about these ingredients on how to improve or develop this love between husbands and wives between spouses. I'm going to give you 20 points.
I don't expect you all to remember these points if you have if you have any if you can take notes of him the left you cannot then the brothers are recording this.
As a matter of fact, these points were actually in hamdulillah.
uploaded on the on several websites and also on some magazines.
So let's try to talk about this hub.
When we go into restricted between husbands and wives, between spouses
How can we increase this love?
And don't tell me that I've been in? I'm 60 years old. Tell us I'm too old for that.
Are you better than the Prophet I said,
when he used to pamper his wives at his Stata center.
So don't tell me I'm 56 of them. 60 or helaas, it's dumb, the buses gone.
And I'll maybe talk to my daughter or my son later, I'm talking to you too.
How can we increase this love?
Here goes, number one.
The chef has mentioned this point and this is extremely important.
In the importance of this relationship between spouses, it is extremely important. Because my brothers and sisters, let me share this with you personally, I perceive love or I perceive marriage as a ship.
sailing in the midst of the ocean,
whereby the captain is the man the husband, sailing the ship.
And the wife,
she is the commander in chief,
guiding the captain sailor ship, because the captain himself cannot say that ship.
The ship is called marriage.
The ocean is called dhania world. So this ship goes through this ocean, that sometimes this ocean is rough. Sometimes it's Smurfs, likewise dhania world sometimes you go through hardship sometimes it is beautiful.
That's how I personally perceive it's
so for the successful marriage, only the price has been enterprise wife to both come together to sail the ship of marriage. Number one,
like the brother said, exchanging gifts.
As the prophet SAW two sentences in the Hadith, reported by Abu Hassan
Abu exchange gifts amongst each other, it will develop love, it will trigger that love amongst you
to head out to handball and heavier
sisters is having a dis gifts presence
can be a form of maybe a smile or a beautiful word which we're going to talk about. Because what's worth this piece of goal that you want to bet your wife and then in return, all she gets from you is cursing swearing, she does not need that piece of gold she does not need that flower by the way by the end of Sharla the purpose here is not to make any lineup by the flower shops after the end of this lecture. Although inshallah tada we wish that to happen and we hope for that to happen. And as a matter of fact, we get a lot of calls from some sisters saying yes
we need another ocean of love lecture because you know handily In the beginning we started getting some nice treatments and some nice flowers and gifts and whatnot and after some time so we need another those of ocean of love
exchanging gifts amongst each other
will increase that love to have to happen
it could be as simple as far as I said, well it could be creative you happy you see something nice
and then you bite your wife let's say and then you say Masha Allah when I saw it in that in the the mannequin wearing that thing it didn't look so nice but now that you weren't in it
you be creative you use your watch these Egyptian the best Mashallah in the isn't it? Try to mimic
something like that I thought she put she put in operations you say national businessman No, no, no does not really have a smell but when you put it
you see see the thing here had a minute my word that this is love. exchanging gifts amongst each other will trigger that love. That's number one. Number two, extremely important to allocate time to sit together
have time spent some time together you and your wife. This one you just you and your wife to talk about issues problems whatnot, it you know, just have to start conversing with your wife and with your husband is extremely important.
Number three, mother,
God will show
the look of love.
Hmm, I see some of you smiling. I don't want you to dream here.
I'll keep dragging you.
Because when you look at your wife, you should, you should understand what she not her needs. And the fact that she looks at you should also understand what you need. Just through the look.
There's a hadith that actually was reported by as soon as narrated by I will say the country by this head, it's just for the amount of an enum that this had it was classified as weak.
But we'll mention it here that the Prophet alayhi salatu salam says in the washroom is another one in associati. He knows he knows.
When a man a husband looks at his wife, Allah surgeon will look at them with a look of love with a look of mercy. The look of mercy.
It will be so beautiful if this Navara if this looks are coupled with touches
with hugs, hug
TV and a wish list and mosquito net. So what Oh, hey, baby, Hey, no, can't do that. Why not? Huh? Experts they say that for the women. This is not me.
Women to feel safe and secure. They have to be touched 30 times a day
or less. This is what they've said. I don't know how they make up this 30 times I could argue with that. Because maybe my case with this is more than 30 so what is the only way 30 but for the women or a woman to feel secure, come here like that. For the woman to feel secure. She has to be touched 30 times a day. And what I did was I went to my wife and I said Okay, here we go 1234 514 she says no, that's not how it works.
A little touchy little hug there.
For them to feel secure. Hugs. How do you feel when somebody comes and give you a really hug? I don't want you to give me that just thing Yeah, like the basketball players or
not that's not the kind of hug I'm talking about.
Because sometimes they come in they give you that hug and it's your problem you're the one who's sitting there come back this is the hug This is the way they hug
what kind of hug is this?
Well I just took a shower this Monday yeah there's nothing wrong and if you can give me a really good sound sound sound heart I want to feel you
that's the kind of heart that your wife needs from you.
should be what yours yet.
And I'm not too good with this
can i because I only have 15 more minutes I guess with this
warm greetings number four
welcome greetings especially when you come home
as the profit is awesome you see the whenever he used to come home The first thing he used to say as salaam alaikum.
bozhou any language you like listen, it's okay. Just say
that's the first thing the Prophet our system used to say bringing peace into your home.
praise the wife and not compare her with somebody else. This is extremely important. Like the brother said, if you want to live happy, never compare your wife with somebody else.
you stop competing here with somebody else. Your friend Allahu Akbar. She cooks Masha Allah
you know your husband must be extremely happy.
My mother Oh, my mother used to talking about his mother. I have some students they have this problem. You know the the wives actually call my wife and they start complaining that you know that we don't he does not converse with us. He just talks to his mother but he does not talk to me. It's a big problem. Phrase your life liberal competitor with somebody else. never compare him with another way for another sister. They don't like that.
Masha. Allah is that lucky when she does something as well I can level fakie alash Baraka Masha, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, but Yaki less lucky la under Nick Offerman praise her. This will give her some sort of encouragement to do more next time this month.
Brothers and sisters, my sisters, this also applies to you. I'm not giving this message only to the brothers. And then you go home and then the sister will come to you say, Did you listen to the show said
Are you ready? That is
it applies to both
praise. There's one sister who wanted to praise her husband.
And then he came home and he was really, really upset. So she said, Why are you upset? She wants to give him a no she wants to comfort him. Are you upset? He said
he had him up here the donkey. He says method shaman. The shaman passed away.
And then she says, oh, what should I say to convert him? She's What?
She wanted to convert him.
She said you are better than 100 donkey.
What's wrong? No, no, you better than 100 donkey and then she just spoiled it. Oh,
no, no, no, I meant you're better than those don't pass away.
hikma. Yes, I'm hikma.
That's number four on number five. Number six. Participate together in the household, the Corps of chores of the household, it is extremely important. Because some husbands my brothers and sisters, they think that there are ministers of Finance. Their work is on the outside, paying the bills and whatnot that they when they come home, it is not my responsibility to participate into the chores of the of the of the household. It is the responsibility of the wife who says are you better under the Prophet I said when I
would describe him
in the book, there's a whole chapter in Bukhari
that talks about this
How was the prophet and he saw the same kind of feedback
he was in the service of his wife when he was asked how was the Providence was met? Well, he was in the service of his wives always service in his wives work in supporting his wives participate in the throes of home that there's nothing wrong my brothers and sisters have us sometimes cooking you get sick of this buddy Anybody? Anybody any salsa Okay, here My turn. I cook something else and then maybe you can if you burn it It's okay. But give it a try.
Help maybe so can you like the brother said you cooked I wash the dishes
help it's very important ingredient by the way you want in your problems because we're in the kitchen now. The kitchen of love talking about these ingredients that will help us develop this love.
Number seven kind words.
Because kinda is my brothers and sisters of Southern
Alka Lima Posada
say something nice.
You don't have money to give as charity you can see beautiful watch, you'd love to be counted as a charity. It's a form of charity is a form of very bad.
It could be as trivial as a smile in the face of your wife.
A smile in the face of your wife is considered to be bad
because my brothers and sisters there's some brothers actually who comes to the mission. Hmm
they smile and they laugh as soon as they go home.
The killer the general the smiles the bus has come home. No smile whatsoever. Why? Because I'm the boss. I shouldn't show them that I'm smart that I smile. Why? Because they may show my weakness so I don't smile at home I only smile outside lash.
I said earlier
they I see a smile in the face of your wife is a form of a charity.
Don't give her that yellow smile. I call it yellow smile.
Give me a smile from your heart. Show it from here coming from here a nice smile. Like the hug as I talked about a beautiful smile a beautiful hug a beautiful cinema in a coma beautiful, gritty and beautiful word. These are all things that will help in Charlottetown to develop that word. Let me speed up here. Spend time out together. out together, dine out together, you know go out no parks together whatever just you need to spend some time out together with your wife. It is extremely important
into the into flourishing and embellishing the the relationship between spouses
extremely important. I cannot emphasize it enough my brothers and sisters, to try to spend time together out with your wife's
peaceful gatherings number nine peaceful gatherings to discuss issues, jokes, anything but hope to have those peaceful gatherings with your wives.
a husband has to be balanced
manner What do I mean balanced? there certain husbands always say, yes. Whatever they asked for Yes, yes. Or no husbands? No. Hello? No, no, we gotta be manners Marina
I want to visit my mother by Let's go together and shabbaton I want to sometimes you know, there's certain people certain husband they always either Yes, or they either know, somebody No, we have to be somewhere in the in the middle balanced. Number 11
show your interest and support and care.
Especially when they're sick. Because they remember the day when they're sick and they need you and you weren't there while lucky they show you how when they get better. And they said you know the member that they want I needed you in there. And they will keep in mind you know about that time for the rest of their lives.
That's how they are Subhan Allah. Allah has created men with some characteristics and created women with other characteristics. They tend to remember these little things as us men.
Yeah, and there may be a lot of good things and you forgot about them. But she does you know you do one thing or one little bad thing to her. She remembers that for the rest of her life. So the karasuma salatu salam
Nabila Nick foreman machine
when the Prophet Allah Association says that the cover underneath what kind of cover this is what to do towards your husband's when you know sometimes your husband they do so well good things towards them and then they don't show praise back. But the day when their husband does something, do something or does something bad? Right. They keep reminding them about that thing. Did they when they would say Marla at Minka Ferran. I've never seen something good from you know, I'm never seen. I've never seen nothing good from you. You've never told me anything about anything good. Anything nice. You've never taken me out. You've never know hugged me You've never kissed me but I was they
forget about all those good things that they when you do something bad. How could you savasana but inshallah sisters, I'm not from those. And I don't want to create any Fussel conflicts here. Our sisters out here and our mothers and they're not from those these are no people who do not who actually do not connect themselves or not connect themselves with a lot of Xhosa.
So show your support and your interests and care.
Number 12. This is extremely important. Break the routine. Always the same thing. You come home cinema and you come you go have dinner, you go to your bed, you go watch TV, and then you know break that routine, especially with your wife. surprise her. Well surprise him. He comes home he's tired. He goes to his home. He goes to his bed. He opens the bedroom, the door and then he finds I don't know flowers everywhere.
What what what what am I saying something?
No nice when she comes home. And then you're there. Maybe you came in home before her.
And then she was she wants to do some shopping and then she came home and then she smells something nice. What's going on? Honey? I cook dinner for you tonight? Yes, you have such a beautiful evening.
surprise her and break that routine routine is Jani used to notice when there's that routine or the student needs to travel for three four days, change things and then come back just to break that rhythm. Always the same thing always the same thing. Some people say oh should I be able to create a fight? No, no no that's not what I'm saying.
Well we need to break this routine. But I'm not saying create not have a fight law. Yeah and a break the routine by doing something different. Surprising your wife or surprising your husband.
That's number 12 number 13. pamper her
they love to be pampered.
Now I'm what's going on here.
I put your husband here. Have you Betty? Yeah, yeah, this Yeah, better. Yeah, whatever you want to call her and call her with the most beautiful names. In the edible massage. There is a chapter called cornea to Nisa, cornea. The name
The Prophet alayhi salatu salam used to call Isaiah sometimes Yeah.
you wish. Whatever. Yeah. hamara Blondie.
Blondie. What was she Blondie? Well, she blew it and now you just bumper his bumper in her elbow it because she likes to be called in on that. If your wife likes to be called honey call her honey. If she likes to be called honey bee color honeybee in a vinegar, vinegar, whatever. I don't care.
Yeah, honey, whatever. Yeah. Anything to just pump on the web. That's beautiful. That's nice. Same thing, you know, so there's some husbands who call their wives Yo.
yo, buddy. Okay. She's your buddy. Yo, yo, yo, what? is this? You?
Does she like it? No, she doesn't. But for me, it's easy. Oh, it's better than a floppy mouth. But you'd be on what's going on? Your bush?
No, she likes to be in a pump with her. Yeah, yes. Yeah, you know, things like that same thing for your husband's my sisters. Same thing bumper each other.
To increase love amongst you. It will differently Krzysztof amongst you.
Number 14. Don't hide your feelings. Being straightforward. If something harms you or something hurts you, talk to your wife, talk to your husband, not in front of people.
Not the front of your kids. Never in front of your kids. You have a problem. Go to the site, which I've just shown you often talk about it. Don't just pick up the phone that because a lot of sisters they come in brothers economy complains about this. Any little argument that happens? Pick up the phone Dad, you know what he did? What did he did again? Oh, he did the anahola.
But and then they started cursing him Why? If you have a problem, solve it between you and your wife. You don't have any little thing. You just pick up the phone and call the mother or the father or whatnot that tried to solve your problems just between you peacefully between you and your spouse's? Not in front of your kids. Again, extremely important, never in front of your kids, and never argue in front of your kids. There was a this is a true story. It happens. A sister she was with her husband and then he sort of yelled at her and then she started crying.
And then her parents showed up.
So she opened the door and then she was dripping some you know some tears. And then they said, What are you crying? She could have said what do you know what he did? But she didn't say sir. She didn't say that. You know what she said? She said, Well, I was thinking about you. I missed you. So I started crying.
Had the hill Masada.
I thought about you and I started growing. And then they came in. She welcomed them. She cooked dinner and then she acted like nothing happened.
And the husband was there. He noticed he says what's going on here? As soon as the parents left he went and he bought a very nice gift. And then he came to his wife and he said, is that lucky? Is that lucky? Well, he taught me a very nice lesson second lucky.
Another way she had a problem with her husband and she went to the chef.
Yeah, Chef, my husband doesn't listen to me always argues with me. He does not come home and this and that. And then the shift told her listen.
I want you for one month, never argue with your husband.
Whatever he says just go along, move on, go along. Come back to me and see me after one month this is your prescription.
After one month she tried to call a chef she couldn't find him.
For after a couple months. He tried to call them again. She was able to get a hold of him and she told me she had been trying to come to California for the past couple of months. And he says okay, how is it tell me? He said she says My husband is like a ring in my finger.
Whatever he says, I say TK
whatever I say he says TK or she says TK Okay, whatever. Okay, okay. No problem. arguments. You want this Carlos Bismillah fine.
pumper her call her with her Most Beautiful Names. I just mix those into.
Don't talk about your problems at times.
stand up, please. Stand up. Please. Stand up. Stand up.
Everybody stand up, please. Now, everybody stand up. Please.
Give a hug to your brother. Give a hug to
Somebody next to you give him a hug. Everybody give a hug to each other. Hug each other Bismillah
a nice one a good hug
from the heart from the heart.
Thank you. Nice Nice.
Have a seat please have a seat. Have a seat.
Have a seat.
This was also hug each other.
Let me know when I should proceed. Can I proceed by
Have a seat. Have a seat please.
Number 16 Now
Let me know whenever you want me to start.
I should have just four more points to Charlotte and I'm done.
You're recording? No, you put a pause on this.
You see number 13 you know pampering the wife and and calling her with her Most Beautiful Names are two different points. Okay.
Number 16. As I said don't talk about your problems at the time of going to beds Lana because some May Allah forgive him. Some sisters, they are professionals in doing that. The time if you want to go to bed and arrest, they have a list. A list of expenses, bills problems awaiting you.
You're not going to have a beautiful night's sleep, you will have nightmares.
When you go to bed, the bed is time to relax. It's time to talk about beautiful things. As a matter of fact, experts they say that we should actually invest in our bedrooms more than the living rooms because what people tend to do now when you go to their homes
we tend to spend a lot of money trying to decorate our living rooms why not the guest rooms the family rooms, but percentage time if I were to ask you how much time do you spend in your living room versus your massive bedroom?
Roughly speaking, how much time sometimes you don't go to your living room for a week after somebody shows up but your master bedroom you go that every day at least eight hours a day isn't it the expert they said that's what we should invest more Why make it look nice make it look romantic, a beautiful beautiful pillows silky things whatever. Make it a room What if you were to go you will feel extremely happy, extremely peaceful, a serene environment you and your wife yes
that's the bedroom and I know one of my students I know I'm not saying this please sisters don't take it easy on your husbands. He went and he told his wife I want you to really create renovate my bedroom going by everything brand new new beds, new sheets new everything color paint everything. Well Extreme Makeover thing it happened to the master bedroom right after he heard this so I'm not saying this just make your bedroom somewhere where you would go and feed peace. Nice not talk about your problems in your bedroom.
Number 17 shore tanks.
shore tanks just like love him. When she does something nice Jenny show your support. As I said it goes hand in hand with the some of the other points but showing thanks, man, let me let me just go to law.
Who does not think people who wouldn't take a law?
Take people thank her whenever she does something like I need to
apologize. This is number 18 apologize at times of errors and mistakes. There is nothing wrong about you saying are you sorry, I'm wrong. I'm sorry. Because some husbands or some men, they think that's going to show how weak I am men and it actually shows
When you do something, yeah. And when you make a mistake and then you say I'm sorry is that Please forgive me. Please forgive me. It really shows that other side of you.
Number 19 respect. Marriage with no respect would not and shall not last forever. It can't. You have to have respect in your marriage.
Your respect your wife
And you respect your husband. And number 20. Last but not least, contemplate the seed of the Prophet it sorta Sam, I hope I think maybe Sheikh Mohammed or shift. Naveen talked about this today, contemplating the seed of the Prophet RSR to Sudan. How's the Prophet SSM with his wives, read the books in the Sierra that talk about the treatment of the prophet to his wives, as he used to race Ayesha and used to beat her once. And she used to beat him and race him, you know,
once and then and then he used to say, Yeah, I show her
how she reported his Muslim, she says that, you know, the Prophet used to sit on my lap. And he used to this at the end. And she used to play with his hair. And he started to sit and imagine sitting with the professors and the Prophet leaning on her on her lap. And then she's playing with her with his head with his hair, and his recital. And yesterday, what kind of beautiful gathering is that?
He's with the Irish, and he told her, she told me, tell me about the worst, your worst hardship. And then he told her about the time when he went to a bar if, you know, in this gathering here, he stood in her life and all he had, and then he and then he told her, and then and then he went, and he got a cup of milk. And then he said, I'd like you to drink. And then she says, Yes, please drink first. She says, No, nyesha, please drink first. She drank first. And then he took a cup of milk. And then he turned it from the same spot where she drank from, and then he drank from it. This is called the art of love. And then he picked another piece of meat. And then he said, Yeah, I should please have
a bite. Please, you have a bite first. He said, No, no, I'd like you to have a bite. First, she had a bite from this meter moreso of this piece of meat. And then he had and then he took from the same spot when she had the bite. And then he had another bite to
know germ sharing and whatnot.
This is again, the art of love.
This is how life or how marriage can flourish and prosper.
We need a hotel. There's so many problems my brothers and sisters happening in our society, unfortunately, between husbands and wives.
As I talked to him in our mentioned in the beginning about problems about divorce, and the man this man, it's a true thing. You know what, actually, I don't know how true it is. But I heard it from somebody who said this man who divorced four or five wives in one minute. He was married to four wives. He told us, he got an argument into an argument with one and he told her
the second wife, she said to ABA, well, she didn't do anything. And then he says you are part of
your divorce too. And then the third one, she came and she says yeah, Hey, what's going on here? They're both twice in 10 seconds. He said, You are divorced twice.
And then the fourth why she says, Well, I can't imagine.
He was crazy. How can you divorce your two or three wives in no time? He says you are the worst
the neighbor while she was listening. What kind of crazy man is he? He was four waves in no time. He says you are the most to if your husband agrees. The husband says I agree. She says you're divorced
in less than a minute
leahlani my brothers you should really be careful because I'm telling you really seriously I get some calls sometimes from them by the seen ya know some sisters complaining about you know, just for any little thing. Ballack Ballack Ballack la la, la la la la, la semilla of Holloman Hanukkah, Muslim and what I mean metallisation head pastor practice center coffee, please as I said again, I don't want to have you know, they say no the flower shops been packed only tomorrow in Charlotte early morning. We want this to be a continuous process. The another profit is AutoSum says in the Hadith reported by Al Bukhari Muslim on all hockey for most of the work.
Annie Lama he
the Prophet alayhi salatu salam says the best is the most beloved is in the sight of our continuous deeds, even if they're trivial, but continuous deeds, something that you do continuously. I don't want you to go and buy your wife today a flower with a little rose or maybe some KitKat or some chocolate and the philosophy that she wants see that for another 10,000 years melasma should help us to practice on the COVID Allah subhanho wa Taala and stuff in the corner.