Owning Our Mistakes

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Omar Suleiman

Channel: Omar Suleiman

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Episode Transcript

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Dear brothers and sisters when we talk about the concept of Toba when we talk about the concept of repentance, there's a very famous Hadith from the Prophet sallallahu wasallam where he said another move Toba? That regret is repentance. And that doesn't mean that regret is the only ingredient of repentance means that regret is the fundamental ingredients of repentance because obviously, it is not sufficient for a person to simply express regret and not to take any action after that regret. But you cannot take any meaningful step back towards Allah subhana wa tada in your repentance unless you start off with another. This idea of sincere regret when Medina is alfalfa hay, Shelton, Alamo

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and foster home the cattle love those who when they commit an act of shamelessness, or they have wronged themselves they remember Allah subhana wa tada esta foto de don't obey Him and then they seek forgiveness from Allah subhanho wa Taala until the end of the ayah. So it starts off with that sense of acknowledgement, that sense of regret. Now obviously with the emphasis on toga in the wake of our, you know, frequent deaths, the emphasis on returning back to Allah subhana wa tada regretting our mistakes and repenting to Allah subhanho wa Taala becomes a whole lot harder when other people are involved. Why because that requires us to swallow our pride as well. And that's

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harder for us to do as human beings, it's easier for us to repent from a personal sin between us and Allah subhana wa Tada, knowing that we're not going to be shamed by Allah subhanho wa Taala we're not going to find the brokenness of our pride with Allah subhana wa Tada. But when it comes to owning up our mistakes when they involve other people, then I have to swallow my pride, as well. And that's where you start to find greater difficulty and tension that a person will insist on their wrongdoing, even if they know it's wrong, because I can't get over that bear of pride. And this is why in relationships, when you talk about the argument impasse, where I feel like acknowledging my

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wrongdoings will give you the upper hand or disrupt the proportionality. So I can't acknowledge my wrongdoings in a relationship. Because if I do that, then you're going to take advantage of that. And you're going to do you know, you're going to claim the upper hand the upper edge. So what do I do instead, I feel like we both did wrong, but you did more wrong. And until you acknowledge you're wrong, I'm not going to acknowledge my wrong. And that will keep us a little bit even. So I'm going to continue to insist on my wrongdoings and on my position, I'll use more use statements instead of I statements. And I'll continue to deflect with blame on you. And that's how marriages end. Because

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the two parties cannot show that level of humility, Subhana Allah, even the Prophet sallallahu I think he was someone who is a prophet of Allah, if you want to talk about claiming authority, he could have in his relationships, put his foot down and said, I am the messenger of Allah.

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You know, we should stop this argument right now. This is how you kill any argument. I am a little luck. But what is the profit slice that I'm due? He demonstrated excellence. So it has to be that way that a person is willing to acknowledge some wrongdoing some mistakes, and listen to the other perspective. And that takes a great deal of humility. Now there are different levels of acknowledging our mistakes or our wrongdoings in the midst of you know, our interpersonal dealings. One of them is when someone gives us no see how when someone gives us advice.

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And we don't like that advice, or we don't like the person that's giving the advice, or we don't like the way the person is giving the advice. Right, but now see how to me to own my own wrongdoings to acknowledge and own my mistakes. Now, when it comes to that type of exchange, there are two sides of the same coin. Why? Because the profit slice I mentioned, he mentioned pride, as

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you know, condemning people looking down upon people and both of them happen and rejecting the truth. When it comes to the first side of that, which is the one offering the advice. in a way that's a condemnation, with a judgmental attitude, with condescending behavior to the other person, the Prophet slicin. I'm told us about these two men from Benny Islam. He had two brothers, one of them was a sinner. The other one was an avid was a worshiper. And so one day they get into an argument and the one that sends a lot says to the one that's a worshiper that Allah sends you as a watcher over me, and what does he say to him, Allah will not forgive you. And what is

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The prophets lie Some say happen a lot of generals, the two brothers up and said so the one who said that Who told you

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who I forgive and who I don't forgive, how dare you write? That is a person playing God. You don't get to play Allah in your condemnations or your advice. That's disguise or your condemnation that's disguised as sincere advice. You don't play God. You leave that to Allah subhana wa Tada. That's to the divine route. And you can give advice, but you don't offer that judgment. The second side of that the other side of that coin is not playing God, but it's playing the devil. Why? Because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, and this is my authentic hadith, where he said his Salatu was Salam. The most beloved of words to Allah subhana wa tada are some Hanukkah Lama will be handy

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go into a lot of

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glory and praise be to Allah have blessed is your name and exalted Your Majesty. And there is no god but you and then he sets a lahardee he was an unbelievable calamity Lola and Nikola Raja Raja de tequila, the worst words to Allah, the Most angry words to Allah subhanho wa Taala is that someone says to another person, be mindful of Allah subhana wa tada fear Allah, think about what you're doing. And the person responds, Allah, you can be half sick, mind your own business. That's the other side of the coin, rejecting the truth, because I don't like the person giving you the advice. Or I don't like the way they're giving the advice, or I just don't like being advised. And the

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prophets I said, that's the worst person that the people don't even give the person advice anymore.

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You don't want to deal with his mouth, let him run his mouth. Let him ruin himself because we don't want to talk to the person anymore. Because they don't take advice. And this is the behavior that olara xojo tells us and

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what either Tila Tequila, ha ha ha that is a bit different.

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You say to a person, fear of loss of hundreds out of Be mindful of a loss. I think about what you're doing. I'm trying to help you fix your ways. I've heard that too, is that if that person is held captive by their sense of Iza is a by the way, is usually a good thing. It's dignity. It's honored. But there's a false sense of ERISA, which is just arrogance. It's not addicting in honor it's pride

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with their sin, and so what do they do? They send more, they reject the advice and to make a point they get worse. They go further and further and further their oppression. And what's the opposite side of that? The husband who Johanna right so that person the only thing that's gonna suffice them is to hang them in the hereafter. On the other side of that let me not nassima yesterday enough Sahaba de la la la la la, la la, la la right after that, what is the law tell us? There are some people that have sold themselves in the pursuit of a loss of animals as pleasure. What do you want?

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You want honor Allah gives. And that person does not consider their knifes their selves in the pursuit of mental health and love and the pursuit of a loss of pleasure. And so when they see anything that comes their way, pleasant or bitter, that can potentially bring them closer to Allah. You know what, I'll own it. Does that Allahu hadal Thank you for helping me see an ad in Arabic or UV Rahim Allah

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or UV I should thank this person. Thank you for helping me see that does that the left head for pointing that out? You know what, let me acknowledge my wrongdoing, that person's wrongdoing will be between them and along the Day of Judgment. I don't want to be destroyed by my wrongdoing on the Day of Judgment. Does that

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mean yesterday enough? A person has no neffs they sold their selves in the pursuit of Allah Subhana Allah, the other person is captive by their knifes captive by their pride and so they don't hold themselves accountable. And there are a few ways in which this transpires. The first one is with oppression with lone with tyranny. And this is the, by the way, the context of these verses and sort of buckle up is in regards to voting. These people that are spreading facade, corruption on Earth, hurting people consuming people's wealth and they're taking pride. They're seeing the pain that they're causing. And they're high fiving each other and saying look at us, right they're they're

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being grown in their Kibet in their pride. And so with tyranny, what happens with the tyrants with an oppressor with a violin, and I'm talking about our own selves and our own interpersonal relationships, people start to backbiting gossip one another, and then what happens? People start laughing at it and they egg one another on and when you have your foot on someone else's throat, or you are taking away their honor, they're well, you're oppressing them and

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someone tells you to fear Allah subhanho to Allah, what's happening to you? You smell blood. And like a shark, some kind of love. That human being truly a second assignment to me about him. Allah said, a human being has the capacity to be a devil or an angel, a shape or an angel. We become grown until the end and oppression, we smell blood. And so you go further and further and further. You have cheerleaders. And so because you have cheerleaders, you can't hear your own conscience anymore. You can't hear your sincere critics anymore. Because you're winning. And one of the prophets I send them say, scary. Heidi, by the way, in a La Jolla, yummly. Laval, Allah azza wa jal lets the

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oppressor grow and grow and grow and grow Hector either.

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Lam you flutter, once Allah grabs that person, he never releases him.

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person feels like I'm winning. I have the upper hand, I've got the support, I've got this, I've got the power to do this. And this and that's not their arrogance grows their pride, gross, then a lot of snatches that person and never releases that person again. When it comes to personal sin, and someone gives you sincere advice, loving advice. And a person insists upon that sin. Why? Because I don't want to be told I'm doing something wrong.

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every type of advice towards me is an attack on. And that's how we start to interpret you know, things. Everything that comes my way is an attack. Everyone that says anything that's mildly critical is trying to destroy me. And so my immediate tendency is defend deflect. Right and so Hannah law that's why the Prophet sighs so the more in this of what the

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the belittling of Since you insist upon these sins, why? Because I don't want people to think that I gave this up just because this person said that I should give it up. I've had people unhedged with me, that had a turn of heart, a change in their lives, and they're about to go home, and they're thinking about how they're going to, but if I change this, or if I give this up, if I start talking differently, dressing differently, walking differently, doing things differently, they're gonna say, oh, that person went to Hajj and Oh, they did this. We've been telling them to do this all along. hamdulillah they finally listened. I don't want to give the satisfaction to those people. That's not

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how it works. Why? Because you're seeking mental health to love the pleasure of a lot. So your personal accountability is not driven by success in this life. It's not driven by winning something in this life. It's driven by meaning a loss of Hannah was added with a clear conscience, and with a sincere effort to meet him clean. And with this headache, dear brothers and sisters, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said in the Hadith from abroad a lot about the Allah tala, and manifests at South Africa to mean that

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wealth is not decreased by a person spending it and charity. Your wealth is not going to decrease when you spend in it and charity. One, the law who I've done behalf when in law is

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and a lot does not increase a servant in pardon and forgiveness except for look at the word, his glory, glory. Even if it's temporary humiliation, Allah increases them and is in truth as

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the glory the Praiseworthy form of dignity, not the false one, that the hypocrite continues to insist upon the prophets lie some use it in the same capacity of what just like your charity, you might see the numbers on your bank account decrease. You might feel like you're giving up but you're not you're actually increasing the bulk of your wealth. The same thing with your honor. When you humble yourself when you increase in forgiveness a lot grows you and the prophets I saw them finished one not to la la I hadn't Leela Illa Baba Hola. And no one lowers themselves for Allah except that Eliza elevates them. May Allah subhana wa tada allow us to be a people that seek His

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pleasure and all things that own their mistakes that seek forgiveness from Allah that reconcile with the people that seek glory from Allah subhanho wa Taala. May Allah subhanho wa Taala do away with pride so that it does not destroy us in this dunya or in the African Allah. Amina colocado Marisa Muslim infrastructural in a hole for him hamdulillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam ala rasulillah Karim Allah Allah He will be a marine Rama Nina will not well mostly mean or Muslim or even normal, not. in Mecca, Semyon caribou moody but there was a lot more filler in our cabinet or for under

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opennebula and personnel in them tougher than out of Hamelin akuna Hosni La ilaha anticyclonic in akuna. Meanwhile, I mean, a lot more ciliary dinajpur hamanaka marrowbone se la la la habana as far as you know the reality no kurata ariano Jana dealing with subpoena Emma la

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So this one must have been a theme a shout out to Nevada we have a lot of light at the end of the bargain was originally planned on unveiling himself and he developed a lot a lot a little gladly would assemble each

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one and in fact, you will moon carry will never come to come to the Kuru Kuru La Jolla. Kuru Kuru one and now he is one of the crolla he acquired voila, who Yamato stonework himself.