Omar Suleiman – Fiqh of Pregnancy #3

Omar Suleiman
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The speakers discuss the importance of giving gifts before and after birth to prepare for the baby, as well as keeping a woman in critical situations during pregnancy. They stress the need to avoid certain practices and avoid certain forms of sadness, such as reciting the Quran and making assumptions about the child's health. The conversation ends with a discussion of a potential issue with a baby who may die before four months and the need for a permanent body. They also mention the importance of planning ahead for a baby shower.

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			extremely excessive she can even combine her prayers at that. At that point. The other scholars say
she says still pray on time, but she should just continue to
		
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			to keep something there to keep herself clean to keep her and it's considered had done which is
continuous discharge at that moment. Also in Salah in prayer, one of the concessions is that when
the woman feels excessive pain towards the end of her third trial, you know, over third trimester,
she is allowed to pray sitting down at that point. Okay, so she's been given that permission
		
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			to pray sitting down.
		
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			All right.
		
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			Now the next one is
		
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			if you go to the doctor, obviously, you're going to be told that you need to take prenatal pills DHA
and prenatal pills.
		
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			Now, with that being said, a lot of these pills have gelatin in them. Actually, the vast majority of
them have gelatin in them, right? So I actually wanted to, I wanted to make this presentation as as
comprehensive as possible. So I actually researched pills that don't have gelatin in them. And
actually, my wife used these which was nature made, there was a brand called nature made. If you go
to Whole Foods, you get a brand called nature made there is no gelatin and those prenatal pills also
handed out we have different Halal vitamin companies. Now, I don't know if they have prenatal pills,
nor vitamins and HNC. You can check if they have Halal vitamins, prenatal vitamins in particular,
		
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			nor vitamins and HNC. But if you're looking for a brand nature made does not have gelatin in it. So
it's not permissible to use gelatin in that moment, the next thing is the hair comb on your doctor
finding a doctor and Hamdulillah we live in Dallas here, there's plenty of female doctors plenty of
Muslim women OBGYN that can take care of that.
		
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			But what is the preference the order of preference there. So the scholars say the order of
preference when a person has to expose their out
		
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			for medical reasons Muslim woman is the first one. And if you can't find the Muslim woman, then
		
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			then who?
		
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			Then a non Muslim woman. And if you can't find a non Muslim woman than a Muslim man, and if you
can't find a Muslim man that it would be a non Muslim man. Now, obviously, you're gonna be able to
find a non Muslim woman anywhere. Okay.
		
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			But I was just mentioning that just so you can have that in your mind, you know, knowing the knowing
the filthy ruling on that the order of exposure of Allah when there's any medical emergency
actually, for that, you know, just on that note, any medical emergency, if a person has to expose
what is traditionally a job, that is the order that they would have to follow? All right, so
hamdullah being in Dallas, Michelle, it's a huge blessing, just having so many options in that
regard. hamdulillah
		
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			the next one contentious issue, baby showers.
		
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			I get asked about this all the time. And I'm so hesitant because people get so emotional with the
answer. Now, in principle, there is nothing wrong with it, in principle, don't just put Halal next
to it right away and say, All right, I'm not gonna listen to anything else. He says, in principle,
there's nothing there's nothing wrong with it because it's not religious in its nature. There is no
to Chabot because she you know, imitation is and things of Deen it's not associated with any
religion. And it doesn't compete with AIDS. So even the scholars that would say that it's easy to
add that comes every year its annual, like a birthday or something of that sort. It doesn't compete
		
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			with their eat, unless you get pregnant every year. Which many people do Mashallah.
		
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			But you know, at the same time, it's, it's not annual. So in principle, there is nothing wrong with
the idea of of coming together for a baby shower. But there's a few conditions obviously, number one
extravagance, a sloth has to be avoided. There's a lot of extravagance at these things. A lot of
wastefulness a lot of extravagance just like in weddings. Right. There's a lot of wastefulness, you
know, and it also puts people in a hard position socially, you're expected to give a certain gift.
And you know, if you're given a gift, you're expected to give a certain gift, this is wrong to put
people under that pressure is wrong. So it should not be treated like a must, can get mad at someone
		
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			for not attending a baby shower. specific practices, practices that are specific to the cultural
baby cultural baby showers that we have, shouldn't be avoided, specific practices should be avoided
as much as possible. Why? Because their show will hat they're doubtful matters. Okay? So you should
try to avoid the specific practices.
		
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			But in essence, if it's just a gathering to give gifts to the mom to prepare her, for her baby, then
it's fine. But I want to make a note on that.
		
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			It's much better to do that. So giving gifts to the mother and you know, helping them prepare for
the baby is a good thing, but it is much better to do that after she gives birth to the baby. A lot
of times I've seen that happen. It's heartbreaking. The baby shower is done. You have all these
gifts all over the place. And then you know, the baby dies, the psychological and the traumatic
effect of that, you know, it's not something that the city I would want obviously. Okay, so we
should not
		
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			We should not want that to happen. All right, so it's better. So it's better not to do that to
people to give the gifts before and have this party before it's better to do it afterwards. One
time, just bring your gifts maybe you can combine it with the speaker, right? It's good for the
people to provide gifts and you know, help the mother prepare and things of that sort.
		
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			So, again, in principle, nothing wrong with it, specific practices should be avoided. Okay, and we
should try to eliminate the non the non Islamic practices and it's better to do it afterwards. It's
better to do it after because then you'd also be fulfilling a sunnah at that point, which is help
helping the the, the new parents is actually a form of sunnah. As we'll come across, right, the
Sahaba would help each other out. Giving gifts afterwards is actually a sunnah. Okay.
		
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			Also in the last trimester, and the last trimester, many of the scholars particularly an Imam, Malik
Rahim, Allah and from the Maliki school, they say at that point, a woman can only dispose of a third
of her property, why the person does their will. Right? They can only Allah subhanaw taala has
already designated two thirds of everything that you own 1/3 of it is what you own right? You can
you can give charity with that. You can designate some of it to your family, perhaps you want to
give you know someone who's getting a share a larger share. So you can do whatever you want with
that 1/3 Some of their LMR they said that Rasul Allah say sallam said that a woman in their last
		
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			trimester and her last trimester because she's so close Subhanallah to death, especially in those
times, you know, you don't have the, the hospitals and things that we have today. Right, the
advancements that we have today that she's so close at that point that at that point, she can only
designate 1/3 of her property. I'm not saying I agree with that opinion, I just find it very
significant Subhan Allah just to mention it.
		
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			But there is no authentic hadith that I could find, at least that would that would designate that
but a person who's following the Maliki school, obviously, they would be bound by that opinion. But
just to show you again, your your if he had to teach, you know, Jihad and visa vie, Allah you're in,
you're in a position of being a soldier of Allah spawns at that moment, you're being pushed close to
death at those moments. And it's very important to keep that in mind.
		
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			What are some of the things that can be done during pregnancy?
		
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			Okay.
		
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			Number one is that children can hear things in the womb, right? See people with their headphones and
stuff like that walking around playing stuff on their iPad, iPod, or iPad, or whatever it is,
letting them listen to all kinds of jazz music or, you know, symphonies and stuff like that to try
to enhance their brains. And, you know, subhanAllah it's, it's been medically proven that when the
child is in a traumatic environment, I was listening to, to a doctor talk about this a child
psychologist, when it's in a traumatic environment, when is hearing yelling and screaming all the
time, even when it's in the womb, it'll come out and it'll already kind of have a bad attitude,
		
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			right? It'll already be traumatized a little bit from everything it's been hearing on the outside.
And you'll find that in the with the time of the setup for the memorial coliseum Rahim Allah P said
the seller used to recite the Quran to the child even when the child was in the womb.
		
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			Okay, they would actually recite the Quran to the child even when in the womb. And he said,
especially in the voice of the mother, because that's the relationship obviously, that's going to
need to be the most the strongest and one that's going to need to have the most trust in it and
things the component of trust. So in the voice of the parents, I mean, even the mother the father
also but hearing the Quran in that voice, so you don't just put Sundays on your stomach, what you
know, you recite the Quran to your child's panela while the child is in the womb.
		
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			And there are no particular sources for that. Alright, so I was seeing some websites like recite
every day so in fact you have 45 times to your child and then read kulula head 17 times all of that
is nonsense. Sorry, just reading Quran in general is a good thing to do reading Quran to your child
while the child is in the womb. And the amendments to the know him Allah to Allah He said that a
person should make the child familiar with the name of Allah subhanho wa Taala before the child
comes out of the womb, so even speaking to the child about Allah subhanaw taala making them familiar
with Allah's names Subhanallah even if obviously they're not going to come out you know like a Saudi
		
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			has set up and say in the Abdullah
		
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			it's not gonna happen if it does then Masha Allah but you know, we'd be pretty impressed with just
Baba you know, or mama you know,
		
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			but still just preparing the child and having a good environment around Subhanallah harmony around
the child, not lots of yelling and screaming and stuff like that. Okay, having harmony in the
environment, even while the child is in is in the stomach and obviously making dua for the child's
righteousness and health. You know, think about it, this is the time where you really need to step
up here.
		
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			Okay, so engaging into
		
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			not just making dua for agender shouldn't be doing that, making dua for righteousness for health.
		
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			Okay, and go for Zachary Alayhis Salam when he made that before Yeah. And as you know, he's in his
90s and he's making dua to Allah for a child before I even told him that okay, I'll give you a
child. He's already asking Allah Subhana Allah to Allah for all the qualities of the child, right?
Yeah. Do you feel any way are you feeling earlier I call Bucha. Yeah, he's already talking to Allah
about how he wants his child to be. Okay. So make dua for specific things. You know, make dua, that
Allah Subhana Allah grant you, you know, a scholar, make dua that Allah Subhana Allah grants you, a
Daya make dua that Allah Subhana Allah makes your child special, while the pleasing to Allah Subhana
		
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			Allah to Allah make dua that Allah makes your child intelligent, all those things, make the offer
that be specific, don't wait to see the child and then decide then how you're going to make that for
the child. Make sure ask for specifics, even while the child is in the womb.
		
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			So that I'm gonna go ahead and break for questions inshallah. And then we'll take a break, and then
we'll come back and talk three o'clock. Yes, sister.
		
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			I'm in my second trimester, and I get really dizzy and Head Rush coming from surgery.
		
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			So I've modified by sitting in my second and then my fourth. So I pop up for third.
		
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			I mean, it's better to maintain consistency throughout the salaah. So if you if you have the excuse
to sit, just sit.
		
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			Yeah, if you're gonna if you if you don't know, if you're gonna fall, you're gonna be dizzy or
things of that sort. So for example, if you want to pray like if you think you can make it to duck
eyes without getting dizzy, and it's not harmful to you at all, then you could do those two kinds of
sadhana that way, but you know, it's better not to just be alternating so much throughout the Salah,
just from the flick of summer.
		
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			If it's consistent, that's fine Inshallah, do as much as you can. That's fine, but you have the
permission if you have the permission to sit for one block and Salah you have the permission to sit
throughout the salon. If you're not able to stand for the entire salon, then you have that
permission.
		
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			Have you talked to a doctor about that and things of that sort? Okay.
		
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			Okay. Yeah. That's why masala women are. We had enough that time. All kinds of stuff happens, right?
		
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			I'll go one brother, one sister saw Yeah.
		
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			What's that?
		
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			password or
		
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			is it okay to ask for a daughter or ask for a son? It's okay.
		
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			It's okay to ask for it's okay. You can't use can't say it's haram to ask for a gender. Just don't
be disappointed if it's a girl.
		
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			Or if it's a son, you know? Okay. Yeah.
		
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			practices during lunch hours, but can you be more specific? I've never been to a baby shower. So I
can't give you too much specifics on, on what you need to avoid. But I mean, obviously, you know,
just things that are that are very specific, like to the culture right there. shobo hat, they're
doubtful matters. Right? So bringing flowers to a wedding is okay. But you know, when you start
doing like specific things, like turning around and throwing it in whoever catches in, like when you
do that kind of stuff. I've never been to a baby shower. I have no idea how baby shower looks.
Alright, but just avoiding specific practices, because they might fall into doubtful things.
		
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			Alright, so that's all. So just having a get together to plan for it. That's fine. Not being
extravagant. Again, it's better to do it afterwards. But it's fine.
		
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			Yes. So go back to that previous section. You mentioned that it's after four months.
		
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			miscarriage, we do the Janaza the naming rights and all that. But the main form is before four
months.
		
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			And it's to show you that there is no life. But there's a heartbeat to baby as well. Medically. So
do you? Are you not required to do for good? No, no, you don't throw it away in the garbage? I mean,
you still dispose in a reasonable way. But there's no soul at that point. That Oh has different from
the physical preparations and things of that sorry, the soul is difference distinguished. You can do
the naming is
		
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			no, no, you don't name at that point. You don't do that.
		
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			I should repeat questions. Right? The question was about if a child dies before four months, so you
still you're obviously not going to throw it away. You'll still dignify the the fetus, right? But
you're not going to name it and do janazah and things of that sort and also at that point, sisters
yes.
		
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			So you don't know
		
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			any doctors like maybe
		
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			you assume it has a soul? You assume that it was more because you take the safe side and that
failure? You build upon what certain so if you don't know if it's four months, it could have been
four months maybe a day younger a day older than you would take the safe side
		
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			Yeah, obviously it's Yeah. I mean, the setup didn't used to have like ultrasounds and stuff like
that. And you do you make your best judgment and you assume you always want to be you always want to
err on the side of caution.
		
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			What's that? Yes. And the blood will be fast at that time, you're assuming fully that it's a four
month fits on the board, or you're assuming it's a four month old baby.
		
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			Who raised their hands first? Go ahead. Yeah.
		
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			You mentioned that the committee also could be using Yes. So because it's a hodge it's not an
aurora.
		
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			It's not just a danger to the life.
		
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			No, because I had so the question is about deformity and things of that sort. And if the child has
some serious issues, and it's still within the four months, right, then at that point, it's still
it's still falls within Hajra it's still allowed.
		
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			Okay, sisters QUESTION Yeah.
		
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			1/3
		
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			of your property.
		
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			Did you guys attend the will part last night? The whole gathering okay. So yeah, in reference to the
will in a will. So right now if I want to give all of my money to my daughter because I feel like
that's fine.
		
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			But once you're done, you can say in my will I want to give everything to my daughter at that point.
It goes to the divisions that Allah subhanaw taala has made an inheritance. So in essence, at that
point, the my magic Rahim Allah said at that point in that last trimester, then you're like that
person. You can't just give everything up because you're afraid it's you're only allowed to
designate that 1/3 Yeah, I'll do one more question then we'll take a break inshallah. Yeah,
		
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			I'll get you a bit of money the next
		
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			four months or even before four months is considered
		
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			like a miscarriage after the soul or is it? It's a miscarriage regardless, but the fetus has the
soul after four months. All right. All right. So we'll take a break inshallah Tada, probably 10
minutes Shala give people a chance to refresh themselves I think Do we have any refreshments
outside? Yeah, we have tea and refreshments outside inshallah Tada. So we'll we'll reconvene
		
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			at three or five inshallah Okay, reconvene at 305 Does that common law fighter cinematic
		
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			Yeah, you know let me turn the mic off and everything is a personal opinion
		
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			when you see
		
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			that it has no performance because like I had a software
		
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			decision he was like
		
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			you want
		
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			to learn
		
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			so
		
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			like
		
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			to talk a little
		
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			bit more
		
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			it's making a decision
		
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			to start
		
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			listening to you unless you have to I want you to listen.
		
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			really late on a good day, everybody
		
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			it's nice to go see epic I'm seeing
		
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			Europe over there. I wasn't mentioned already this
		
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			summer so
		
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			officers interrogated
		
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			a lot.
		
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			came from a lot to
		
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			be said is not
		
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			You don't
		
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			have some
		
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			degree of authenticity
		
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			right and
		
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			it's just an hour
		
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			so we don't even know what
		
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			the solar cell contains