The speakers discuss the use of "har merchand" in the context of "monster" and the importance of context in finding the right words to use when making decisions. They also explore the history of Islam and the importance of respecting spouse's emotions and emotions in relation to their behavior. The speakers emphasize the need for people to have peace at home and avoid overwhelming pressure on oneself. They also discuss the conflict between their mother and their father, the importance of studying and not bringing others into situations again, and the difficulty of making people happy and avoiding forgiveness.
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wilhemina shaytani r rajim Bismillah Ar Rahman AR Rahim yohanna being Ulema to Henry mama llama hula
Tabitha Lima bata as well as Chica la foto Rahim rubbish Aki sorry were silly MD, after Tamil
dishonor, to leave and hamdulillah lillahi wa Salatu was Salam O Allah Rasool Allah, Allah Allah He
was happy. So once again everyone salaam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. We are now starting
section one of this surah and section one is made up of IR number 123 This the first three out of
the surah our makeup section one, Allah azza wa jal says yeah you have to be I'll give a rough
translation first prophet addressing him directly. You can say noble prophet because that will it
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can be
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well yeah, we'll attack him because I like some say that when you say you hide can have multiple
meanings one of them can be for honoring so noble Prophet, the motto heavenly mama handle, ah hulak
Why do you prohibit what Allah has made permissible?
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Actually, what Allah has made permissible for you to tell him about his magic, pursuing the
contentment and pursuing the satisfaction of your spouse's will law who have fought over him, while
Allah is extremely forgiving, always loving and caring. We're going to discuss a lot of things about
this ayah The first thing I want to talk to you about is the use of Yeah, you have to be the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi Salaam, of course his name is Mohammed. His other name is also mentioned as Ahmed
in the Quran and sort of stuff. But in the Quran, Allah never called him Dr. Muhammad. Nor does he
ever called him Yeah,
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actually, Allah says, Yeah, Adam was gonna call Jana ya know? Yeah Brahimi as a courier yah yah, yah
yah Odia Messiah Isa, you'll find other prophets called directly by their name Yeah, Ibrahim, you
like I said before, but you know, you don't find your Mohammed in the Quran. On the contrary, there
is a narration that has to do with another Medina surah. So to which a lot which will do soon in
Sharla, where some veterans came and said, Yeah, Mohammed oferuje. Elena, they came to the prophets
apartment and said, Mohammed come out, we want to talk to you, which is not much different from yada
yada yada, yada, yada, yada. And yet that Yeah, Mohammed was so offensive to Allah. He said Under
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Armour lucam.
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You know, Coca Cola, God, don't you call him like you call each other, all of your good deeds will
be taken away and you won't even know you didn't curse him. You didn't talk down to him. You just
called him by his name. Just you said yeah, Mohammed. And that was enough.
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That was enough. So there's a sensitivity in the Quran towards the Prophet size element, how he
should be addressed. And this is part of the the honor and the nobility granted and afforded to our
messenger so I solo so when Allah Himself addresses him, he says, Yeah, you have a soul. Yeah, you
wanna be messenger, prophet or messenger or prophet. Yeah. You have Muslim men. Yeah, you have
madatha you know, he'll give him these names when he lemercier Mohammed Oh, yeah. But that never
happens in the Quran. And interestingly enough, even if he uses the word Muhammad, he titles it. So
four times Mohammed occurs right? And all four times three out of four times Actually, he says
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Muhammadan rasul Allah Valentina, Mara, Nakata, Mohammed Al Abadi, murjani como la Qin rasulillah
salam ala rasulillah. Yet remember this Mohamed, what where do you even if you don't know the Arabic
what two words do you keep hearing? Muhammad? Muhammad, Muhammad was right and so over and over and
over again, except one case when the Xena Armando Ali had well I'm an OB mnos Allah, Allah, Mohammed
and Manuel Hakuna Matata him so Mohammed itself, and that's actually purposefully because there were
people in in Medina who were hypocrites, who actually wanted only to recognize him as a messenger,
but not as a person. In other words, he's only valuable when he gives us Koran otherwise he has no
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value.
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And so Mohammed came to highlight that he has value even when he's not giving you put on so Allah
refused to use the word Rahul, when you wanted to highlight Mohammed just for his own sake. Some
Allahu alayhi salam, so that's actually done purposely in South Mohammed. But even then my lucila
Allah, Mohammed, what was sent down upon Muhammad, meaning revelations implied anyway, even then
it's suggested. So the first thing is, yeah, you shouldn't be. The second thing I want to tell you
is the difference between the use of Yeah, you have to assume messenger, versus Yeah, you have to be
prophet. The word nebby comes from the word number, which means news information. And you'll find
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that this is actually the more generic usage of the word for a prophet, because he receives news
from a law that others don't have. When the word is used. It's actually used in the context of the
messenger having a responsibility to deliver a particular message to a group of people. In the case
of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam,
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you'll find that whenever Allah wants to highlight his superior status among people,
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he'll actually use the word nebby. That is actually a privilege on
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The other hand, when he highlights the responsibilities of the profit slice on him, and he
highlights his, the tasks that he's been loaded with, you'll find Rasulullah moundsville economic
spread what has been given to you, but if he's if he's to use his status as the Prophet among the
people to give a certain message that maybe is used, you'll also find that in this particular store,
there's a literary function of the use of the word Navy. I told you the word Navy comes from the
word nebat News. And there's going to be a lot of discussion about where did the news come from?
Where did you get this news from, which is going to be part of the story in this era. And that's why
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the word nebby is also appropriate and how the profit is addressed. Some Allahu alayhi wa sallam, by
the way, when the surah begins with the iu hanabi prophet directly like that, what does that tell
you? It tells you that obviously the soul is going to have something special to do with the prophets
personal life, or something very direct with the Prophet sallallahu Sallam it gets your mindset is
ready to we're going to learn something about our messenger honey subtle Sam in the surah right
Allah will comment on our Prophet personally in the surah on the very beginning because the opening
of a surah basically set the tone for the rest of the Surah Now he has a list of ham, the other two
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Linda Bhima Robbie and euro Corbin FC binominal am Melissa a turban well Ali woman will allow men
come as a hobby Delica electronica Babu facility. I agree with this commentary of Ignacio de la
Rahim Allah, Who says that Allah asked him why do you prohibit what Allah has made permissible? This
is a question, isn't it? Why do you prohibit what a lie is made? permissible is the question. You
could also make it into a prohibition don't prohibit what Allah has made permissible law to have a
Holla Holla isn't it? But why? What's the difference between asking a question and making a
reprimand asking you a question can actually be much more subtle, softer, and it could actually be
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he interprets and says I'll make it simple for you. Take it easy on yourself. Why are you making so
much harm on yourself? What allows me
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it's actually not reprimand he's saying it's not a job. It's not no harm. It's actually done feel
from Allah is actually making things soft and easy from Allah to the prophets. I seldom, Allah is
telling his messenger, you're being too hard on yourself and we're going to explore that a little
further. Those who do say that it is him being corrected or him being you know, scolded by Allah.
Like to be Rahim Allah says this very eloquent. He says, What's the who and the humara button?
Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah Kabir, you know, when when do you get corrected when
you do a mistake?
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Right, which in the religious sense is a sin? When you make a mistake before Allah, you've done a
sin. Now you can do a problem into the profit committed sin soliloquies. No, that's not the case. So
he says, actually, when Allah corrects him, it's called Allah, which means there was a better way to
do things. This was good. There was better. And then when the prophet SAW Selim is corrected, it's
not right versus wrong. It's good versus better. That's all this is. This is not a small sin or a
big sin. We don't attribute either of those to our beloved messenger so Lola Honda he said them How
about now Now the other thing Lima to remove Why do you prohibit
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who did he What did he prohibit? You remember in the narration
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he prohibited honey on who on the moron himself.
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Okay. But Allah did not say Lima to her remove Alana fsic mahalo la hudak. Why do you prohibit upon
yourself what Allah made permissible? he simply said, Why do you prohibit and he excluded the
language upon yourself. This is language that's used elsewhere by Jacob by Yahuwah. Instead of a
llama Rama is La La, la FC, and FC.
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All kinds of food was permissible for Jacob for yakou.
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Except what he prohibited upon himself. He didn't like camel meat. Yeah, who didn't like camel meat.
So he didn't need it.
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Like somebody offered him chicken versus camera is no thanks. I'll have the chicken. This is how do
I Marlin FC. You know in our culture nowadays, when you say hi, Ron, what does it mean forbidden by
God.
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But in old Arabic, and in the language of the Quran, haram actually is contextual. You can say Haram
is also what I don't like to do.
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Well, for example, if I was living 1400 years ago, I could get away with saying tea, coffee, and
cappuccino is hot Armani.
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Hot ramen doesn't mean that I give a fatwa that they're wrong. Or I'm in trouble with the law. I
just I don't like them.
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I don't I avoid them.
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Okay, I'm into chocolate milk or something
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that will actually liberate the language for that would be Haram.
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Nowadays because Muslim culture has been fossilized for so long. When we use the word haram we
usually mean something prohibited by Allah. Right? But that's not the meaning here. He didn't say
that. It's Haram.
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By Allah He just said I'm not gonna have it anymore
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but so the meaning isn't Why do you make haram? I don't like that transition. Why do you make
impermissible? Why do you prep it yourself? And actually, again, I shouldn't say yourself because
Allah remove those words and we have to explore why.
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The thing is when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam prohibits something
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in his personal life,
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he was actually very cognizant of the fact that this will have ramifications on the entire Ummah,
they are obsessed with him. Salallahu alaihe salam, they will want to do everything the way he did,
they will eat what he wants to eat, they will ignore what he wants to ignore, they will dress like
he will dress they would talk like he would talk they would like walk like he would walk.
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So Ally's making it clear to him also, not only was the messenger clear now I already know that the
messenger was clear about this. How do I know that?
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Because he told his wife, what?
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Don't tell anybody. There's no reason to keep such a trivial thing hidden unless he knows there are
ramifications. Allah reinforces that by saying when you prohibit, know that the prohibited
prohibition is not adjust towards yourself. That's why l and F ck is not here. It's not just limited
to yourself. You'll be limiting honey from yourself, those who love you in this generation and the
generation after generation after and there will actually be believers from now until the day of
judgment, who as soon as they're about to take a look a little lick of honey, and somebody says
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Rahmani Allahu taala and who? Kala Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Leonard Allah who I'm not
gonna have honey ever again. And he believer with any ounce of love for the province I love will put
me right back.
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My messenger didn't have it. He swore he won't have it.
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He swore he won't have it. And honey is something called answers why fish evolved in us? It has
healing for people. It has healing for you. And then there will be a debate in the oma is that I am
and Sue's because of the practice of the prophets lies on them.
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And then there will be a set of items.
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And oh my god,
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all because he just told his wife. It's okay. I won't have honey.
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Do you understand the high profile position he's in? Like the little things he does how they become
a big deal. How books would have been written about this. There would have been volumes written on
honey. Eliasson Fie Sonata Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam
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chapters and discussions and then there would have been loved and the rod of the rod, and then my
God, and we are a fifth of the world's population, which means much of the honey produced in the
world, is produced by Muslims. And that wouldn't be produced anymore.
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We just collapse that entire industry,
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just by ourselves, the world would look different.
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Because the prophets lies, told his wife, I won't have honey.
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This is heavy stuff. The Prophet is being taught your actions have very, very major ramifications.
But there's another very subtle lesson here.
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And the subtle lesson is that the oma
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Look, this word got out. Like the secret if hadn't been kept desired wouldn't have come right.
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Which means the Prophet would not have had any again,
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hypothetically speaking, the Prophet would not have had honey again, and the secret would have been
maintained. The thing of it is, even now that we know that he made that off,
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we could only understand the words of the Prophet size for them, because we know the entire
backstory is not the case.
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If you only knew the Prophet said to his wife, I will never have honey again. And all you had,
that's all you had. Wouldn't your conclusion be that honey is at least haram or moku or something?
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So what I'm trying to say is the oma Allah knew the oma in a large, like population is going to be
susceptible to making conclusions without understanding context.
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That this oma is not going to be prepared to reach conclusions after thinking through what was the
full story, what was going on in the background without without before jumping to a conclusion.
Their love and zeal of obeying the son of the prophets I saw them is so intense, that when they hear
a Hadith, when they hear something, the prophets I seldom did. They don't want to know what the
background was, did you want to do it?
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Does that tendency still exist? Yes. And that tendency can lead someone to very wrong conclusions
out of love of the profit slice of them, you understand? So that's one of the other ramifications
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This is huge, it's huge. Sometimes somebody will call ahaadeeth. And they won't tell you what
happened in the background.
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They won't tell you. And if you knew the background, it's a completely different story. It's
totally, totally different.
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And both sides are actually taking their action out of love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam, but this tendency had to be avoided, this tendency has to be taken care of. So the first
step of that is that words that are said by the prophet sallallahu, alayhi wasallam, should not be
spread carelessly.
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without context.
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They shouldn't be. And the first prohibition of that came to even the wife of the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam, even you cannot share a Hadith of the Prophet, because people aren't mature enough
to understand the context. Even companions won't understand the Can you understand what I'm saying
here? This is pretty heavy. Like, I'll tell you a personal position of my own.
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When it comes to a Hadith, there are different kinds of Hadith in my estimation, I look at things
from I try to look at things from a systematic point of view. There are Hadith about Darfur,
entering the house, the offer going into the bathroom door for changing your clothes, da da da is
beautiful volumes of Hadith just on law. They are, these are the promises about the virtues of doing
something if you do this, you get this many reward. If you do that, you get that many rewards.
There's a huge volume of collection of relief dealing with that subject, yes. Then there are Hadees
about incidents.
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But this incident, that incident there are about incidents. If you want to understand them, you have
to understand the full incident, not just that quote, because one sentence, one soundbite out of the
entire story will lead you to the wrong conclusion. You need a lot of context, the offer entering
the house, do I need a lot of context or no? No, I just don't have to enter the house done. I'm
done. No problem. Some things the province iclm said are easy.
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Some things he said are very contextual. Now, sometimes there are matters of prohibition. Do this.
Don't do this. Say this Don't say that.
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When he says those things? Are those contextual? Absolutely. Is there a particular situation where
he said something to a particular person? Yes. And if you don't understand the specifics of the
situation, you might come up with the wrong conclusions. famous example, that I heard when I was
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for so many years, the sheets, I'm allergic to them, but still. Who next your mother who next your
mother whole next off your mother. Oh, and then perhaps maybe if you have time your father
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inspired by Elisa prophesizing. By the way, who should I be the best to your mother? Who your
mother, who? Your mother, who doesn't who your father.
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The problem is I was actually talking to a person who's not good to his mother.
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He knows he's not good to his mother.
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So he says you should be good to your mom. He doesn't want to hear that.
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So he says Who?
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Who after that. He says your mother, you're not getting it. You're not paying attention to the first
thing I told you.
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He still says who next?
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Your mom?
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Who next fine, you don't wanna listen, at least we could hear that.
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At least we could hear that. The problem is I sent him can diagnose people when they walk up to him.
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So when they asked him for a prescription, then he gives them what they need.
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You know, when you say Who should I be the best to he should have said the Messenger of Allah.
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You should be the best of the Prophet is the prophets. I saw them more dear to us than our parents,
yes or no. He is. But he diagnosed this guy. And he sees that he has no problem honoring the
Messenger of Allah.
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He has a problem honoring his mom, he needs to hear that.
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That's the context. People come to the province I sent him and say, Tell me something that'll take
me into genda?
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Don't give them an answer. Some other guy walks in and says Tell me something that'll take me into
agenda. He'll give them a completely different answer.
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What are they two different ways to go to gender No, II diagnose them. You your gender this way,
your gender this way. That's context. That's the one of the most valuable lessons we get out of this
first lever to how to remember
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is the value of context. Anyhow, let's keep going.
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First of all, he didn't say don't You don't? Why do you prohibit upon yourself Remember that? But
when he said Maha Lala, what Allah made permissible, he didn't leave it open. He said mahalo Allahu
laka. So he's not Allah enough sake on the other side, but look on this side, what Allah has made
permissible for you, and in doing so Alliance highlighted something. Allah is highlighted that he
doesn't go Allah doesn't go out of his way to prohibit but he does go out of his way to make halon
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Love goes out of his way to make things open for you to open the doors of Hillel for you. Hi laka
laka muffle of the Jamia, he created in your favor whatever for you for your benefit whatever he put
on this earth altogether.
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Actually he describes himself you have, the more Allah He will have if he made only the filthy
things proved impermissible for you. Everything else you just opened up? You know, in Islam, we
don't actually ask the question is this, Helen?
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We were really into that question nowadays is this, Helen, because the default position the favor of
a law on us is that he actually made the world What? Hello.
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You know, he opened that door up for us. And he only took filthy, vile things and made them
impermissible.
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So that's in heilala hulak. And, by the way, laka also suggests that these open this open
prohibition that we are the open permissibility that we enjoy the world of halaal that we enjoy, is
actually first and foremost a grant given to our messenger sallallahu alayhi wasallam laka halala
Holika.
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Another implication of that is that there are certain things that are made permissible for the
Prophet that are not permissible for us. There are certain things like for example, number of wives,
the permissibility, for the Prophet is different than the permissibility for the Muslim or the
regular Muslim. So there are certain things that Allah has opened the door for for those of them
that he hasn't opened for us. And by the way, like some Allah would even go on to say, the Annapurna
Willa who shukran de la la tierra often minyama de Waal hija de la, why would you stop yourself from
enjoying what ultimate halaal for you? Because when you enjoy what Allah made for you, you become
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grateful to Allah. That's your way of showing gratitude to Allah, you acknowledge that Allah has
done you a favor. Why would you block a pathway to gratitude?
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So don't block yourself like you're not more religious by making more things hard on yourself, which
is a sick mindset. By the way. There's a sick religious mindset that is programmed to think the only
way I have more Acquavella is if I have a gun with me and I just calm everything. And the more
things that are Haram, the more religious I am.
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What religion is that? I don't know.
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Look at the word mine. This ayah number two Halima Allah, Allah Allah, the word ma means whatever
Allah made permissible, the word why they say in Arabic is mobile, it's open ended. This is the word
itself illustrates how boundless halaal is. Because if the halaal was specific, you know what he
would have said, and levy halala hulak. That would have, you know, Locanda located, it would have
been limited, but Allah opened it up. Then he says about the Prophet, it's so beautiful, you know,
if you if you look at this story, again, I keep asking you the same question because I want you to
stay active in your thoughts. What did he prohibit on himself, honey? That's what he prohibited on
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so one thing but unless has Lima to how to remove Maha lalala? Why do you continually for prohibit
what Allah has made permissible? In other words, this is not just how rumba what why did you make
prohibited what Allah has made permissible? This is a tendency of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam that is being described, you actually, for some reason, which we will see in a second, you
seem to hold yourself back from things that you shouldn't hold yourself back from
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you there are things that Allah has made for you luxuries Allah has made for you convenience his
allies made for you, that you seem to not take full advantage of you seem to have this tendency is
that just one behavior? This one behavior was the excuse for this ayah to come down, like Dr.
Ackerman properly put, you know, has learned that we said this before. These narrations are not the
reason for which revelation came these narrations are the excuse to solve a larger problem.
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Like there's simply an occasion that allowed for a timeless guidance to be sent about something.
This is what the Quran itself says. You know when unless I spoke with Alan falaknuma holy Takara who
Allah Nasional moccasin Koran we separated it so you can read it on to people at the right
anticipated occasion. So my creates these occasions so universal guidance can come down. So this
tendency of the prophet will be talked about in shallow Tyler.
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Why, why does he prohibit this again? Why did he say I won't have honey anymore? He said he won't
have any any more to make your spouse happy.
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But look at the language WWE Mahabharata as logic. I love this phrase, oh my god.
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you pursue the contentment or the satisfaction of your wives.
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you pursue the contentment of your wives.
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But the story was about one wife.
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All of these wives didn't come and say You smell like this. One of them did. Two of them had made a
scheme. But only one of them said because they said whichever one he comes to will say it
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So the language should have been, you are in pursuit of making your wife happy.
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But he says you are in pursuit of making your wives happy. You want to satisfy your wives, what is
the lead telling him you actually, this is not a one time incident, you have a tendency to do stuff
for your wives.
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You keep doing you keep bending backwards and backwards and backwards to make them happy.
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00:25:29
Here, we have to pause and really look at this very deeply.
00:25:30 -->
00:25:33
You know, I'll get into the language of it in a second. But
00:25:35 -->
00:25:46
love the relationship of love, whether it's parental or siblings, or the spousal relationship, love
can often lead to some kind of pressure.
00:25:47 -->
00:25:53
One party putting pressure on the other, if you love me, you will do this. If you love me, you won't
do that.
00:25:55 -->
00:25:59
I can't do this. He hates it. I can't do that she hates it.
00:26:00 -->
00:26:08
And sometimes those things have nothing to do with a law prohibited. It's just you're not
comfortable with something. You don't like it.
00:26:09 -->
00:26:24
Now, I'll give you silly examples to get the point across I mean, we hear here have the example of
honey, but there was a there was something behind the honey, wasn't it? It wasn't honey wasn't the
problem. Something else was the problem. What we're learning sometimes is people on the outside say
I don't like you doing this.
00:26:25 -->
00:26:43
But if you dig a little deeper, there's actually a deeper psychological issue. Here's the deeper
psychological issue is actually jealousy, insecurity. There's a deeper issue here. Right? So some
our wife says to the husband, I don't like it. I don't like when you go out to dinner with your
friends. I know you only go once a year. I don't like it, though.
00:26:45 -->
00:26:45
I hate it.
00:26:46 -->
00:26:48
I feel like you're abandoning the family.
00:26:50 -->
00:26:52
Man. Okay, I won't go.
00:26:53 -->
00:27:08
Now, is that completely normal for the guy to go dinner with his friends? Completely mundane,
harmless? does it actually take anything away from him? No, it doesn't. But she hates it. And he
knows if he goes and he's gonna get the silent treatment for like a month.
00:27:10 -->
00:27:15
He's gonna forget this Laila, Laila, Laila lane, forget that. Sharon,
00:27:16 -->
00:28:00
is gonna get that so he doesn't go. Now what happens over time, what happens over time is, there are
some things that human beings want. It doesn't take anything away from the relationship, but they're
only holding themselves back because the other is uncomfortable. And the frustration of not being
able to live up or to enjoy this thing that Allah has made completely acceptable for you. And you're
only making it hard on yourself, for your loved one. That frustration keeps building inside doesn't
go away. My desire to have a friend doesn't go away. The desire to do the simple things don't go
away. But they simply you're only denying yourself because of this pressure from this loved one. And
00:28:00 -->
00:28:17
as that pressure mounts, you start developing a resentment towards your loved one. I'm only denying
myself this because he doesn't want it because she doesn't want it. Because my parents don't want
it. It's completely permissible. And the only reason they don't want it is I don't even know why
they don't want it.
00:28:18 -->
00:28:36
I don't even know why they keep saying no, I don't even know why she hates it. I don't even know why
he hates it, you can't even tell. But that's because maybe you didn't dig deep enough, there's
something else going on, that needed to be addressed. something deeper needed to be addressed, you
know. And so as a result of that, eventually you get an explosion.
00:28:37 -->
00:28:41
People fall apart. When you close the doors of * and
00:28:43 -->
00:28:45
you keep closing them and you keep closing them in on yourself.
00:28:46 -->
00:28:48
Guess which door starts opening up
00:28:50 -->
00:28:51
the doors of harm.
00:28:52 -->
00:28:53
When you close the doors,
00:28:54 -->
00:28:56
and close, the doors start opening up
00:28:57 -->
00:29:08
and you out of pressure from the spouse say this door is permanently closed. And you start out of
that frustration you start even fearing Allah and the door that Allah closed, you're willing to
open.
00:29:10 -->
00:29:21
But the door that your spouse or your parent or your child or your brother or your uncle, the one
they close, you're not willing to open because you don't want to take get into conflict with them.
You'd rather conflict with a law.
00:29:22 -->
00:29:23
That's what ends up happening to people.
00:29:24 -->
00:29:29
That's a scary situation to be in. Now let's step back and think about this another way.
00:29:30 -->
00:29:31
This is important to understand.
00:29:32 -->
00:29:39
Different people have different jobs. And some people have very important jobs. Somebody who's the
head of a hospital,
00:29:40 -->
00:30:00
lives depend on them. surgeries depend on them. schedules depend on them. somebody's head of air
traffic control at the airport. You know, they have heavy, heavy responsibilities. Somebody is the
governor of a city or the chief of police or the president of a country right or the general of a
military in the middle of a war. These are high pressure jobs. Yes.
00:30:00 -->
00:30:05
Cirno when you have a high pressure job, it takes a lot of time away from home does it not?
00:30:07 -->
00:30:27
Because the more high pressure Your job is, the more you work, you have to put work into your job.
And of course, the more work you put in here, the less work you can put in there. That's just
logical. So you'll find the most important people in the world that do big, big, big, big things are
basically always working. And you wonder when do they have time? For what?
00:30:28 -->
00:30:38
When do they have time for their families? How are they going to make time for their families? The
profit slice of them has a there's nobody who has a bigger job than the prophesies of them.
00:30:39 -->
00:30:46
And 23 years he has to communicate in speech and in practice, the final revelation of God to
humanity.
00:30:47 -->
00:30:57
There is no bigger job and he doesn't even know if he has 23 years by the way, we can look back and
say yes 23 years. He doesn't know that. The mount the pressure on him is
00:30:59 -->
00:31:01
I mean, just look at sort of
00:31:02 -->
00:31:34
low ends and of course Allah Java in Java eight Ohashi and matassa dannemann Casa de la had we
revealed the Corrado on a mountain it would have exploded, a mountain would have collapsed and
exploded with the weight of the Koran yet in a sanuki alayka colon satilla we've dropped on you a
heavy word, the profits lies on him. He's to carry what a mountain can't. So when you say I have
mountains of pressure on me, you don't know what you're talking about. That's mountains of pressure.
So when he has that kind of pressure on him
00:31:35 -->
00:31:40
and just look at this think about his life in Medina. What kind of problems does he have to deal
with?
00:31:41 -->
00:31:45
He's got the hypocrite problem. He's got the Jewish tribes scheming with
00:31:46 -->
00:31:51
the Qureshi now making alliances with different tribes and zombies around the corner.
00:31:52 -->
00:32:01
He's got revelation that's coming down. He's got believers he has to train and by the way, he's also
the Imam of the masjid. Yes. If you ever know the amount of a machine you should know something
about them.
00:32:03 -->
00:32:05
Everybody come to them with their problems, man.
00:32:06 -->
00:32:07
And if they're soft hearted,
00:32:09 -->
00:32:15
the problem becomes their problem is the prophets lesson softhearted will move mini narrow for him.
00:32:17 -->
00:32:19
For me, Mara met him in Allah He lent Allah whom
00:32:20 -->
00:32:32
you give everyone time you listen to everybody's story. Everybody says if they feel the most
important with him, you know how draining that is? The prophets I saw them is constantly being
drained, constantly being drained.
00:32:34 -->
00:32:37
And on top of all of this,
00:32:38 -->
00:32:49
his wives, some of them are jealous that he's spending a little too much time somewhere else. So
they're making this whole honey thing happen.
00:32:50 -->
00:32:54
When you're under that much pressure, where do you need to have peace
00:32:56 -->
00:32:56
at home?
00:32:57 -->
00:33:04
When you start getting drama at home, even if it's a tiny little bit of using smells like herbs
00:33:06 -->
00:33:14
are the one place where you can just relax Li dusk uno, la Ha. So you can stop moving around and be
00:33:16 -->
00:34:01
I can be I can relax. I can be myself. Even the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam needs
a place where he can relax. He needs a time where he can relax. What is his relaxation, the time he
has with his family, the time he has at home, if he can't find that there, and drama starts over
there. And he will not have the energy, the enthusiasm, the strength to do what he needs to do
outside. And what he needs to do. Outside is way, way, way too big. So the prophets I said him, his
his peace at home and his happiness at home and his relaxation at home. And no pressure for him at
home has to be protected and it's protected by a law. Why do you prohibit what a law made
00:34:01 -->
00:34:20
permissible for you? You need to keep things permissible for you at home and not feel pressure.
Because of this pleasure or that pleasure. The only pleasure you need to worry about is a loss
because you have a bigger task than anybody else in humanity. You understand? That's the pressure
he's under sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So now something about
00:34:21 -->
00:34:30
so beautiful. Let me of course of Hana huya De Lima, Lima waters logic. Prophet. Why do you try to
make your wives happy?
00:34:31 -->
00:34:59
Why do you pursue the satisfaction of your spouse's? Why did he say that? Why didn't I just say
that? Because a lot actually in this ayah prohibited one thing and not the other. A lot of
reprimanded or a lot corrected that you shouldn't put limits on yourself. restrict yourself from
things Allah didn't restrict you from but actually trying to make your spouses happy is a great son
of the Prophet salallahu alayhi salam. So there's a healthy way of making your loved one happy and
there's an unhealthy
00:35:01 -->
00:35:07
Make your spouse happy. Just don't make make them happy by denying yourself from what Allah has made
00:35:08 -->
00:35:47
for what was made permissible. Don't deny yourself to make someone else happy. Don't put yourself in
misery to make someone else happy. It'll backfire here a human. It's not gonna last, you're gonna
snap eventually. And then he goes in, he snapped, he snapped. I don't know what happened to them.
What's wrong, nothing's wrong, you're just human. You put an unreasonable condition on yourself.
Like Allah says about the monks in Christianity from our Oh Ha, ha, carry it ha, they weren't able
to live up to the unreasonable expectations they put on themselves. Human beings are human beings,
you know, by the way that things allies made halaal for us, are also things that were made desirable
00:35:47 -->
00:35:53
for us, he put an inclination inside of us to want those things. And when you can't have those
things, something goes wrong inside you.
00:35:54 -->
00:36:01
If you only eat bad tasting food, you're gonna be in a bad mood, it's gonna affect your personality,
it's gonna happen.
00:36:02 -->
00:36:19
If you're never around your friends who you miss all the time, you're going to be a miserable
person. It's going to reflect on your work, it's going to reflect on your demeanor, it's going to
affect you. And, and human beings are just a weird mix of things. You can't just say I'm doing bad
emotionally, but I'm doing great spiritually.
00:36:20 -->
00:36:26
everything's connected. If you're doing bad, physically, it's going to affect your emotions, it's
going to affect your spirituality, everything's connected.
00:36:27 -->
00:36:39
The things that lie is made permissible are things that are that are fulfill our emotional needs,
that fulfill our physical needs, that fulfill our appetites, that fulfill our spiritual needs.
There's all these needs are taken care of at the same time,
00:36:40 -->
00:37:16
you're going to just mess yourself up. If you put yourself in that situation. And the prophets
lesson we begin with him. We begin with him. I want to give you a grammatical example, before I deal
with the subject matter because it's a little bit technical. I'll give you two English sentences and
compare the two of them. Okay. He stood up out of respect the first sentences he stood up out of
respect. And the second sentence is he he stood up respectfully. So the first one was, he stood up
out of respect. And the second one is he stood up respectfully, now these in their meaning are
worlds apart. And the first case when you say he stood up out of respect, what is the reason for
00:37:16 -->
00:37:17
which he stood up?
00:37:18 -->
00:37:28
Respect. So actually, the freeze out of respect tells you his rationale behind doing something,
isn't that the case? But when you say he stood up respectfully,
00:37:29 -->
00:37:57
you're not describing why he stood up. You're actually describing how he stood up? how he did it.
You understand that? Now that when you when you answer the question, why this is the Arabic Now,
when you answer the question, why that's a law. Let's call it a law. And when you answer the
question, how that's called hon. Why and how are totally different? If you read this translation,
why do you prohibit what a law has made permissible upon you, or for you,
00:37:59 -->
00:38:01
pursuing the contentment of your spouse's
00:38:02 -->
00:38:44
pursuing the satisfaction of your spouse's. You might misconstrue this to mean, you do this because
you pursue the contentment of your spouse, it might sound like that's the reason for which you do
it. But actually, if that was the case, the language would have been Lima to hardly move my hand
Allahu laka, empty ha amaravati as logic, the word would have been empty ha, but the Arabic word
here is Delhi. It's the melodic form. The Madonna actually here is Han, which means Allah is
describing a beautiful quality of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, not why you do it, the
prophet is way too mature to know that even if I don't stop drinking, if I stopped drinking, honey,
00:38:44 -->
00:39:16
that's not going to make them any happier. He's way too wise to know there's something much deeper
going on. It's actually just in that spur of the moment. For now, I am going to calm the situation
down. And the way in which I will deal with it is the is the how out in a way that will make them
happy. So it's not the rationale of the profit slice alone, but rather the way in which he made the
spouses happy that's beautified here, so panela I know that's a subtle thing to understand, but I'll
say it another way. The problem is if someone comes in the wife says that smells weird.
00:39:17 -->
00:39:22
And he very gently and very lovingly says I'll never have it again.
00:39:24 -->
00:39:40
He doesn't say one la de la, la la. You know Atlanta or la sala, aberdyfi, hayati? Nothing like
that. Nothing like that just gently and lovingly, the way in which he did it is actually beautified
in the Koran. It's highly
00:39:42 -->
00:39:49
Why do we Why is that important to note? Sometimes we do things for our loved ones, but we don't do
them in a very loving way.
00:39:50 -->
00:39:52
I even bought you flowers.
00:39:57 -->
00:39:59
Yeah, but you did it the way
00:40:00 -->
00:40:08
You know the reason because I love you? Yes, your your endo was good. Your reason was good, but the
higher the way you did it was horrible.
00:40:10 -->
00:40:14
That's not when you get flowers, you stabbed her with the stem.
00:40:16 -->
00:40:17
That's not how you do it.
00:40:18 -->
00:40:22
Okay, I'm gonna take you out to dinner and you're like, angry the whole drive
00:40:25 -->
00:40:26
doing this for you, you know?
00:40:29 -->
00:40:31
You know what I would really rather you didn't do it.
00:40:32 -->
00:40:44
I'd really rather you didn't do it. Because the way in which you're doing it is far worse, I would
have been better just depressed at home, then fearful of the next outburst in the car. You
understand?
00:40:45 -->
00:40:53
The beauty of the prophesized Sam's character is not just we do things out of love. But the idea
highlights, you do things in a loving way.
00:40:55 -->
00:40:58
The way in which you do something, so hon Allah talk to him about
00:40:59 -->
00:41:08
such a deep, deep lesson you're going to do and there are broken relationships in which people do
things for each other, but they do them in terrible ways.
00:41:09 -->
00:41:14
You know, I did that for you. Really? It hurt like crazy. He did that for me.
00:41:15 -->
00:41:16
I couldn't tell
00:41:17 -->
00:41:21
you no, because you just turn into the Hulk. And then I don't know what to do with that.
00:41:22 -->
00:41:35
So this is the theme of data as magic now a little bit of a few more subtleties. inshallah, I'll
stop at the side because this by itself is too epic. So we can't go any further. But there are there
are a few more things to teach you guys about this.
00:41:36 -->
00:41:54
Gentleman. While Elmo slides out. First of all, I made it plural. Even though the narration from
Buhari Muslim makes it abundantly clear that this was about one wife, I said this before to you, you
know, in this one Alliance done, Alliance has actually made her a secret.
00:41:55 -->
00:41:56
Allah didn't expose her.
00:41:58 -->
00:41:59
The narration exposes her.
00:42:01 -->
00:42:02
But a lot doesn't.
00:42:03 -->
00:42:15
The Quran doesn't expose her. And that, by the way, is not even a hadith. It's a narration of Homer.
And why is that? Okay? Because that's his daughter, right? So a father can talk about his daughter a
certain way.
00:42:16 -->
00:42:46
But the She is the mother of the believers, is she not? And so she should be spoken about
respectfully. And if she's done something that deserves reprimand, then we should cover for her. And
you know, who teaches her how to cover for her? Allah Himself, because he covered for her by
including all of the spouses, not just her, you did this, you're doing this in pursuit of you know,
or you did this pursuing the the contentment of all your spouses, he kind of put it in a group and
didn't let it get singled out.
00:42:47 -->
00:43:00
This is a very important lesson for us. Loved ones should not be reprimanded, shall be highlighted,
we should cover for them. A lot of covers for her. Well, the Allahu talana. This is actually an
internal conflict I was having.
00:43:02 -->
00:43:31
As I studied these I art I realized that a lot covered for our mothers in so many ways. He doesn't
want us to know about the honey. Actually, he didn't. He didn't want us to know about the secret
what it was. He didn't want us to know what it is that the Prophet made prohibited. And what he made
halaal he didn't want us. And by the way, if you wanted to tell us about honey, could you tell us
about honey, nobody's more rbn than Allah. Nobody's clear in speech than Allah. But he's keeping
things ambiguous.
00:43:32 -->
00:43:41
He's purposely hiding the situation. And that itself is huge guidance. It's huge guidance. Why
expose something Allah has kept hidden.
00:43:43 -->
00:43:51
And then on the other hand, my conflict was but despite the vision Buhari is narrated by a lot of
the lohana who, how can I hide Hades?
00:43:52 -->
00:44:00
So you got to share this Hadees. But then I imagine, you know, the conflict I have the conflict I
was imagine how solid the long line is sitting in the audience.
00:44:02 -->
00:44:07
And I'm talking about her having a secret conversation with my mother, I shall be alone, hmm.
00:44:08 -->
00:44:12
And then they got caught. And then I asked him, would she feel good about that?
00:44:13 -->
00:44:15
Would you feel good a speech being given about you?
00:44:17 -->
00:44:19
And their mother, they deserve better? Don't.
00:44:20 -->
00:44:31
They deserve better? So this is a conflict. There's a very real conflict. We are being beaten, no
doubt about it. They are our mothers. I'm talking about my mother.
00:44:32 -->
00:44:34
How comfortable am I talking about my mother in this way?
00:44:35 -->
00:44:51
She and she's more than my mother. Well, the Allahu talana. So to me, how did I was able to
reconcile this problem to me Actually, then I realized something I realized that Allah azza wa jal,
reprimands His Messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam
00:44:53 -->
00:44:56
a number of occasions, and I have to talk about it.
00:44:57 -->
00:44:59
And even though I love my mother, and I honor her
00:45:00 -->
00:45:04
honor her and honor her. I can't even begin to compare how much I honor who
00:45:06 -->
00:45:11
our messenger is how to set up. And we have to declare and study when he's reprimanded.
00:45:12 -->
00:45:27
Allah put them are the most noble of creatures on this earth, these noble role models for us, he put
them in those embarrassing personal situations. So you and I will learn never to put others in those
situations again.
00:45:28 -->
00:45:34
They pay the price. So we don't put others in that. And that bus.
00:45:35 -->
00:45:49
That's the that's the lesson here. We begrudgingly reluctantly have to study ABA. So what oh, Allah
insha Allah, we have to study it. We have to study off Allahu Allah. Allah, Allah, Allah, we have to
do it.
00:45:51 -->
00:45:53
We have to study it out of docudrama, the prophets being told.
00:45:55 -->
00:46:02
No, on the problem is being corrected. When the problem is being told, why do you prohibit what
Allah made permissible? We have to study it.
00:46:03 -->
00:46:15
And that's as different. Can you imagine how difficult these are? For the prophet to hear himself?
someone loves? No, I can't even imagine what the mothers of the believers were going through when
they heard these IOD like,
00:46:17 -->
00:46:18
out of court on about them,
00:46:20 -->
00:46:26
and about them, and not, as you go to the IR you'll see gets in get serious.
00:46:28 -->
00:46:35
But then, you know, finally will not hold over him, you're in pursuit of the contentment and
satisfaction of your spouses.
00:46:36 -->
00:46:38
One more thing about us watch, by the way.
00:46:39 -->
00:46:42
I'll give you an example. I have a student Rama.
00:46:44 -->
00:46:48
And I say Rama failed Arabic. Or I made an Arabic mistake.
00:46:49 -->
00:46:53
As opposed to saying my student made an Arabic mistake.
00:46:54 -->
00:47:01
Is there a difference between those two? When I said I have made an Arabic mistake. Okay, well, what
do you expect?
00:47:03 -->
00:47:07
What if I say my student made an Arabic mistake? What am I trying to say?
00:47:09 -->
00:47:25
As my student I expected so much more, isn't it? Both of them refer to the same person. But when you
give the title, then that title comes with certain expectations. And those expectations have been
disappointed.
00:47:26 -->
00:47:27
You understand?
00:47:28 -->
00:47:33
In the later if you will see a southern w Illa. Bobby as YG he had even
00:47:35 -->
00:47:49
when the Prophet slice alone gave and secret, something to some of his spouses. He highlights the
word spouses wives. Why? Because as a wife, you were expected to guard a secret more than anybody
else.
00:47:50 -->
00:47:58
You're supposed to pursue the contentment of your spouses, you're going out of your way to make them
happy. And yet they didn't go out of their way to keep your secret.
00:47:59 -->
00:48:14
So the word comes with expectations is what I'm trying to highlight. And the conclusion of this Iowa
law for Rahim while Allah is exceedingly forgiving, extremely forgiving, always loving, merciful.
This does two things. One, it ensures the Prophet size on them that you shouldn't worry, you're
forgiven.
00:48:16 -->
00:48:29
While I am saying all of this, it's not because you're in trouble unless already forgiven, and less
forgiving and merciful. The second highlight is also an important there's a contrast. You are doing
this so your wife isn't upset with you.
00:48:31 -->
00:48:34
But let me tell you, the only one who truly forgives us a lot.
00:48:35 -->
00:48:39
And the one who truly gives unconditional love and mercy is Allah.
00:48:40 -->
00:48:49
So other than Allah, making someone happy is very difficult. please learn this lesson in life making
people happy, very difficult.
00:48:50 -->
00:48:55
And you know what we've done? Unfortunately, Muslims, we've made people believe that making allies
difficult.
00:48:57 -->
00:49:10
Allah says making your spouse can be making your spouse happy can be difficult, but I'm easy to get
unforgiveness from and I'm easy to earn love and mercy from just worry about me everything also gets
sorted out Holla
00:49:11 -->
00:49:22
Holla It's so sad when people come to me especially I don't know maybe this is I've only noticed it
in the subcontinent the indo parts of continent people truly genuinely believing that allies out to
get them
00:49:23 -->
00:49:27
genuinely believing that allies mad at them. Allies angry at them and they're just going to burn.
00:49:28 -->
00:49:31
I don't know who what Shabbat taught you Islam.
00:49:32 -->
00:49:34
Because that's not the law we believe in.
00:49:35 -->
00:50:00
That's a really evil thing that's been done to people that genuinely believing they're going to burn
genuinely believing there's no hope for them, genuinely believing they will never earn a less
forgiveness. So hon Allah the way people treat you and the way people judge you is not the way
alleges is not the way electorates know lousy which will make us hopeful in his mercy and His
forgiveness. And may Allah not put out make us put ourselves in difficult situations. So that that
concludes our discussion on the first
00:50:00 -->
00:50:03
If barakallahu li walakum wa salaamu alaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh
