The importance of human ability and balancing personal relationships is emphasized in this video. The speakers emphasize the need for actions and recounting actions to avoid confusion and suggest finding balance in life. They also recommend taking care of family members and building a bond with children. The mission is to make Muslims easy, including learning the Arabic language and teaching the Quran to as many people as possible, and the Arabic studies program encourages people to pray for their parents and not to give them too much. The speakers encourage people to be more measured and forceful when praying for their parents and not to give them too much.
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Somalia
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hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala via evil mousseline rather early he
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was sama
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Allah tala of enemies on wealthy man was not because
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he suddenly were silly Emily was Dr. Melissa Hokulea. I mean, I mean,
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inshallah, my intention tonight is not to give you a super long lecture, I think I want to hear more
from you this evening. After I give my initial thoughts for hopefully less than 45 minutes, I'd like
to take about 15 minutes worth of questions from all of you and shout out to either about some of
the ideas that I hope to share with you today. I do think that some of the ideas that I'm going to
share with you tonight inshallah are a little bit different than what you might have been used to
hearing. And I know I have talked about these things before and on different forums in the United
States, I don't think to my, to the best of my knowledge, any of this stuff is on YouTube. So it is
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probably new for a lot of you inshallah, Tada. The Quran teaches us a lot of different kinds of
concepts in very unique ways. And tonight, we're going to explore one of those ways. Some of you are
familiar with the ayat I began today with, when I recited the Arabic portion of the listening part
of this talk, I actually recited a couple of ions from solotaroff man.
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And in sort of refine, the arguments are actually pretty unique. The beginning of it, the gist of it
all is that there are non Muslims, actually, not just non Muslims, non believers who are refusing to
accept the call of the messenger, sallAllahu, alayhi wasallam. And the reason that they have for not
accepting the call is it's not convincing enough for them to believe in a book where they haven't
seen anything miraculous. They say that they're only going to believe if they see. And I've talked
about that part of it, at least extensively, that a lot as well in this show, right? So Thomas Mann
basically says, you're human beings, you can reason at a higher level, you don't have to be
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convinced of something just because you've seen it, you can actually reach conclusions by reasoning
by thinking about something, right. So the human ability to communicate through language makes us
more sophisticated than other creatures, right? So we can reason with each other through language
and talk about things that we can't even physically see. This is something that happens in
universities all the time higher institutions of learning all the time. You're learning literature
and history, you're looking for example, even let's take history, you learn a lot about history
without actually seeing the events. You learn about them through reading about them, through
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discussing them. You learn a lot about justice without actually seeing the abstract concept of
justice. You learn about it through discussion through learning, right? So much philosophy and
wisdom is taught through language without actually resorting to something physically that you can
see. I mean, actually Slahi, a great scholar, just talking about this concept. He said something
brilliant. He said, you know, animals, the only reason based on their five senses. So for instance,
if your there's a fire in a building, human beings can be told through a mic system or something.
There's a fire, please exit the building.
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I don't have to see the fire. If I if I hear the announcement, it's enough for me, but a cat or a
mouse or a dog, they're not going to leave the building until they smell the flames or they see the
fire you understand. So when people said that we're only going to believe when we see a lot of xojo
responded a rough man.
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Allah Collinson, Allah Maha.
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In fact, he taught the Quran, yes, and font should be enough because he created the human being not
an animal. And the human being has been given the ability to use communication our Lama will ban.
That's the one of the rationales of the beginning of the sola. But I want to take it a step further
today. That step further is really, really important. And I think one of the most important
fundamental principles of the Quran, and that is, that revelation or on came
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on came to give us a man, but the miracles of Allah, that should lead you to a man that should lead
you to the conclusion that in fact, there is a God that in fact there is a law, and that he will
hold you accountable. All of that you could have concluded yourself without revelation, even without
the Quran, where should you get that information from? It actually should come from you thinking
about the creation around you.
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So when they
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said listen to this part carefully now when they said we will only believe when we want. When we see
we're only going to believe when we see Allah says really because you have plenty to see. a sham
Tsukamoto because bad one knows more shalom Yasuda. masama arafa Mara, however, the Alameda
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visa, the IRS start talking about the sun in the moon, the sun and the moon are following a perfect
calculation. Allah says you want to see something amazing that will make you believe Why don't you
look at the sun in the moon? So how could an argument be made by Allah, you know what he's saying?
What he's saying is, you are denying the ayat of the Quran now. But actually, every single morning,
you've been denying the idea of the sun. And every single night, you've been denying the
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moon, your denial is not something new. You've been in denial for a long time. And only now, when
revelation came the AI out of the game, you're denying those two. But the denial began a long time
ago. This is not a new cover for you. This is not a new disbelief for you. This is old. This is a
continuation of something you've been doing from before. So how to LA. But I want to highlight
something about sort of refining this beginning. In addition to just the denial of the IRS. Allah
says that shampoo and camo will be hosts by now think about this.
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We when we when we talk about responsibility, right that tonight's talk is about responsibility.
responsible people have a lot of respect for their time. irresponsible people waste their time.
That's basically the difference between responsible people and irresponsible people responsible
people get to work on time, in response to show up late, responsible students finish their homework
on time finish, get ready for the exam on time, etc, etc. irresponsible people don't. that's
fundamentally the difference between responsibility and irresponsibility. Responsible Muslims wake
up in the morning for a pledge of irresponsible Muslims don't isn't that the case? So responsibility
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has a lot to do with respect for time, doesn't it? Now think about this. There are two basic
calculations for time. There's the clock.
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And there's the calendar. There's the clock, and there's the calendar on it within a day. Throughout
the day, what do you rely on
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the clock? And within the week and within the month and within the year? What do you rely on the
calendar, right? So you basically have two functions of time that you base all of your
responsibilities on? Look, you need to finish the assignment in the next couple of weeks, you're
gonna look at the calendar, you have to get to work by ADM, you're gonna look at what the clock at a
daily at a daily scale, you're looking at the clock at a monthly weekly excetera scale, you're
looking at the calendar, unless had what two things in the sky a shampoo? Well, karma Ruby has been
the sun and the moon follow a very precise calculation. The sun is actually our clock.
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The sun rises, and our slot clock as
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the sun gets a little higher, and our slot clock says love. The sun is actually keeping us keeping
keeping our revolutions of the clock isn't it? And guess what we do especially for Muslims, the
Islamic calendar revolves around what
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the moon, the sun and the moon are actually our clock and our calendar. Our entire sense of
responsibility to Allah as Muslims, and even beyond as Muslims as human beings revolves around these
two things, on the one hand, the sun on a daily basis, and on the other hand, the moon on a monthly
basis, the cyclical the cycles of the moon, right? So it's like a lot in this if you think of you
know how you have a wall in your house, and you hang a clock on the wall, and you hadn't hang a
calendar on the wall. Well, Allah has a ceiling for us the sky, and he hung a clock on it called the
sun, and he hung a calendar on it called the moon, and therefore we never were we as human beings
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should never be irresponsible with our time. Because here's a clock and here's the calendar. You can
never miss it.
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Like I would I put my clock Oh, it's kind of bright up there. It's there.
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You know? So hon Allah, what we're learning in these IOD, what we're learning already in these IOD
Is it a genuine respect for time, respect for time. Allah says you don't seem to seem to notice the
sense of urgency in believing. Why haven't you really thought about the precise calculations of the
sun and the moon?
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Why haven't you reflected on them? And thinking deeply about the sun and the moon is the first
exercise I wanted to do today because we are going to talk about responsibility. He says what
shampoo welcome shampoo will come around because ban, let's talk about this a little bit.
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The word horse barn in this ayah can be understood fundamentally in two ways. Our Mufasa rule
traditionally have gone one of two ways, talking about the worthless ban in this ayah. I'll explain
both of them. The first
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one comes from his habit, which is calculation. So the sun and the moon are, are, are determined or
committed to a very precise, extremely accurate calculation. That's what a lie saying. So what a lie
is saying then is, we learned this from other places in the Quran, what is the most honored creation
of Allah, what are called kolomna. Very Adam, we honored the son of other human beings are the most
honored creation.
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Allah azza wa jal gave us in Santa Fe x, Anita qui many of you know that I created the human being
in the best possible form with the best creation. If we're the best creation, then we're supposed to
reflect the best qualities, we're supposed to reflect the best best qualities. Now I'm going to stop
for a second on this subject. And I'm going to go on a tangent, but it's a really important tangent
to build these ideas. Okay, so I want you to stay with me as best you can. Because I am in Bahrain,
and I talked about this yesterday, too. So I'm going to pick up from where I left off. You guys are
very familiar with brand names. Yes.
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So if you see somebody walking around with an iPhone, even from a distance, can you tell it's an
iPhone, you could tell? If somebody is driving a BMW, those of you that are into cars, they're
driving an M five, they're a little bit far away four or five cars ahead, can you tell us that I'm
five, if you're into cars, you can tell, you can tell a brand.
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The thing is, there are certain really good manufacturers are really famous designers,
manufacturers. If you're into fashion, you see somebody close, you can tell who the designer is. If
you're into art, you can see a painting and you can tell who the painter is or what kind of painting
it is. If you're into architecture, you can look at a building and say I think I know who the
architect is, you understand, every designer has a certain signature, a certain style, like Apple
has a certain style as a company, right? They designs things with a certain kind of style. And you
can tell Okay, that's an apple kind of product. You can you see what I'm saying? So a car company
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has a brand signature, a design, you know, architect has it an artist has it? Well, a lot as our
agenda is an architect to the universe. He's a designer of the universe. He's a creator of it, and
manufacturer of it. And like every manufacturer has a signature, right? You could tell their style.
Allah also has a style in how he designs things, how he makes things. And according to this ayah
shampoo and kamaru because we are learning something about the style that Allah likes. The style
that Allah likes, is things that are precise, precise, that follow a particular calendar that follow
a particular clock schedule, that don't delay the schedule that stick to a time. And he likes that
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kind of design so much that human beings are life on this earth is actually it revolves around these
two creations of Allah, which should remind us how important it is to allow how much he likes that
his creations stick to time that they have respect for time. So if you and I feel like we have a lot
of free time, or we can do whatever we want with our time, the reminder against that is not a long
lecture. The reminder against that is actually the sun and the moon. That's the reminder in the eye,
it's very deep. What Ally's saying is very, very deep. But that's the first understanding the second
understanding of the word postman
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beautiful, and suitable calf. There are two gardeners to have a conversation with each other. one's
a little arrogant and full of himself because he's got a lot of money. And he makes the other one
feel bad. And when the other one feels bad. He says Why are you showing off like this? You know?
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at any Hiraman genetic Oh, you sit on a a Husqvarna Minnesota symbol shows well come on. Because man
Oh, you said it was violent Minnesota. The word was bad in the Arabic language also means
destruction. Actually, one of the rare meanings of the word is destruction and HELOC, but it's a
specific
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I have destruction, destruction that is at a very particular time. You may not be into cartoons, but
I am
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in some cartoons they have the the TNT and it's got a little
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you know what I'm talking about?
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And there are some that have the the tn T and it's got a timer on it.
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Right 10 Nine, eight and Tom better get out of there really quickly because Jerry set it up already.
Right? The idea that it will go off at a very particular what time a lion saying in this ayah the
sun and the moon are about to be destroyed at a very particular time. And they have reached almost
the destruction stage. Why is he saying that? He's saying that because right before he said he
taught the Quran? Yes. Who did he teach the Quran to?
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Who did he ever teach the Quran to who's the first student of the Quran on this earth? Rasulullah
and Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam is one of the greatest signs, if not the greatest sign of Judgement
Day.
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of all of the signs of judgment day that judgment day for humanity is coming near the most powerful
of those signs in the hula almanzar
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He is the ultimate sign of judgment a and what's him coming mean? Him and Quran are the same. In
other words, that will soon coming to la hora de Santos is the same as the Quran coming the Quran
coming is the same as the Rasul coming sallallahu alayhi salam for us nowadays we separate those two
right so the Quran is the book and also Salaam is a book of Sierra he's a book like Buhari and
Muslim and, you know, didn't meet the individual. It's, that's that's the size of them. But at the
time of the Sahaba, were they getting called on from from the same mouth? Were they getting some now
from from the same academics? One, it's not two entities. It's one entity that they're experiencing.
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So when we talk about Quran being taught, and we talk about the messenger coming sallallahu, Alayhi,
wasallam, the Sahaba, the Quraysh everybody else, they don't actually separate those two entities
they can't. They're getting them from the same source you understand. So a legend said he taught the
Quran, which means he gave the one of the greatest signs of Judgment Day, and the disbelievers said,
I will only believe when I want. When I see it, Allah says the only big thing left to see now is
that the sun and the moon are about to be destroyed. You're looking for something to see, that's the
only major event left.
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You understand the logic of the ayah It's incredible. It's incredible. Now when Allah says the only
major event left to see after the Quran being taught, is the sun and the moon collapsing them
falling apart. Is that supposed to give you a sense of urgency?
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Absolutely. It's supposed to put you in a sense of seriousness, a shampoo camera was born. Which
gives you another appreciation of what najmul was Sharia Sudan. The next one.
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This is really important too. And I don't want to go into a long discussion about what Naja Naja,
Mashallah she's done, there's a lot of a lot of opinions about what is meant by these two, these two
things, the tree, you know, this, the star in the tree makes sense that there are lots of opinions
on this. And we don't have the time this evening to go through all of those opinions, but I'll give
you just one of them. That's really interesting. And it's in line with the discussion as it
continues. And that is that the Arabs back in the day, in the ancient times, not today. But in the
ancient times. They did not have beautiful buildings in their landscape, they did not have highways
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that are lit, they did not have any of this stuff. So when they did, there wasn't much things to
look at outside in Arabia that were beautiful. Except in the desert. If you find a tree, it really
catches your eye. Hmm. Like I've been looking for a tree for a while since I got here. Right so a
tree will really catch your eye. And at nighttime, what is the most beautiful thing in desert life?
Let's start with two things that are mentioned and najem was shujaa are actually the most beautiful
symbol of beauty in the day. And witches are in the night rather the star and the most beautiful
symbol of beauty in the day for the Arab landscape, which is the tree which catches his eye and he
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says about both of them they are going to be making such as a forum can be thought about as present
tense or future tense. And one of the interpretations of these ideas is when that judgment day
comes, you will notice these two things that you look up to that are symbols of beauty for you
falling down into what size the stars are going to be falling trees are going to be falling. When
that day comes crazy. When that time comes when najmul washes over us. Of course the other
interpretation is that even today, they are
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in a state of such that if you reflect on it, but that's a longer discussion, I'm not going there
yet. Now the part that I really want to talk to you about, that's really the crux of what I want to
share with you today. how deeply put on presents ideas, the idea of reflection on the Koran, and
deriving benefit from the Koran. You know, when you really get into the subject and extract what our
amazing tradition has to offer, if your students of philosophy or poetry or literature, you'll be
blown away by how Koran presents things, really, this is one of those places to me. He says what
sama arafa ha, this is actually a unique thing in Arabic grammar, it's called mush, whoo, hoo, those
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of you that are into Arabic grammar, rule B, he has mentioned twice was sama and then it's repeated
Aha, that was mentioned again, it's twice once before. And once after referring to the same thing.
This is unusual in the Arabic language. And this is Arabic, when this when someone is really proud
of what they've done. To make it simple for you to understand, let's just say that you allow the
student did your homework for the first time.
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When you do your homework for the for at this time you actually did your homework. So you come to
your mom and said,
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homework, I did this.
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You're so proud of your homework, you say homework, I did it. You refer to it a couple of times,
because it's a matter of significance to you. I'm giving you a silly example to get a point across.
The point is this kind of language is used when the Dewar really wants you to think about their
accomplishment. It's not something that you should overlook. We should really pay attention to it.
And allies the duer in this ayah was sama rafaela. de la ha, the sky. Ally's The one who elevated
here he elevated it the sky itself. Have you thought about the sky? You said you're only gonna
believe if you see, have you looked at the sky?
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What about the sky? He says, Well, hold on.
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He raised it and put a scale down in it. This is where our conversation really begins. Allah wants
us to reflect upon the sky. Has he already mentioned something about the sky in these IOD?
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What are the things that have come up that have to do with the sky already?
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stars have come up? What else has come up that has to do with the sky? The sun and the moon? Yes.
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So plenty of reference to the sky has already come up. And by the way, where does Kron come from?
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comes from the sky. And now he's explicitly mentioning the sky and mentioning how high it is. And
then he says he put a scale in the sky meezan is used also for balance. You ever see a picture like
at CT and CT of the two sides of the scale,
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you know that we're looking blind lady holding the two sides of the scale, right that's, that's a
reason two sides of the scale that are balanced, unless as you put a balance in the sky.
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But this this idea of balancing the sky, he balanced the distance between the Earth and the sun, the
sun in the moon, the Moon and the Earth. He balanced all of these things and put them perfectly in
place so life can exist on this earth. He put the stars at a perfect distance from us. He put this
earth in a in a situ in a place in the galaxy perfect for life to exist. You know life according to
the atheist is an accident. The atheist argues life on this earth is an accident. This is one of the
most statistical absurdities ever stated that life is an accident. statisticians standard people
that study statistics, not religious people, people that study statistics will tell you that is the
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most ridiculous claim in the insets that the life on this universe isn't or in this earth is an
accident. There was some organic soup, it was boiling for a long time and all of a sudden the frog
came out or, you know,
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I'm not going to go into that subject by itself, maybe at another occasion one day. But it's you
have to understand this, this place was so beautifully valid for life to exist for us to exist for
the things around us to exist that Allah will then talk about in these ions that are coming. But
think about this. He put balance in the sky, right. And of course the sky is a beautiful symbol of
balance of things in order and they stay in place. They stay where they're supposed to. Right. The
sun is very reliable. You are going to be late to work. I'm going to be late for a lot but the sun's
not going to be late for sunrise.
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I am going to be late by a day or two finishing my assignment but the moon's not gonna be late. The
New Moon is gonna come out. You understand? It doesn't wait for you. Oh wait, he's not finished with
this assignment. Hold on. Wait a minute, let him wake up.
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Cuz he's not gonna wait for you.
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She's not gonna wait for you. Ramadan is not gonna wait for you, when he hasn't finished the entire
season three yet. Don't let Ramadan start.
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Let him finish watching this series, then we can get into trouble.
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Not gonna happen. It doesn't wait for you it's got a schedule and it follows it and it's got a
balance that it commits itself to now one of the most incredible transitions in the Quran
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transitions in the Quran, you know what that means? If the Arabic term is empty thought, Allah
talking about one thing, all of a sudden, he starts talking about another thing. A lot of times when
you're reading the English translation of the Quran, you're like, What just happened? How do you go
from one thing to just a totally different subject? How does that make sense? That's what's
happening in this ayah. Now, he says what sama arafa however, the Amazon and Tato film Isn't
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he made the sky, he raised the sky and put a scale in it, put balance in it. So you you don't cheat
and don't violate, in when it comes to the balance. You don't cheat when it comes to the balance.
You don't do wrong when it comes to the balance. Oh my god, wait, wait, wait, what? We were just
talking about the sky. And now we're talking about who you mean.
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And he's connecting these two things. He's saying The sky has something to do with you.
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If you understand this connection, you will understand today's conversation.
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This was the whole point I was trying to get it. If you understand what I'm going to get at now. The
sky is perfectly balanced. And unless has I balanced it. And the reason I balanced It is so that you
have lead a balanced life.
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Allah says he made the sky balanced. So you lead a balanced life. That's what he's saying. And so
now what in the world does that mean? Imagine back in the day you own a grocery store, and you sell
vegetables and bananas and fruits and whatever you sell, okay? And you are you know, of course, you
put the weights on the one side back in the day, and you put the fruits on the other side, until
they get what balanced. Now you are a little bit of a cheater. So it says two kilograms, the weight
says two kilograms, but it's actually 1.9 kilograms.
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So you give your customer less than what they pay for it. And this is how you make a little bit
extra money.
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So you are technically cheating in the skills. Now there's a government official body that comes and
make sure that your skills are up to date, and you're not cheating in them and all of this stuff.
But you know what this is saying? What official reminder is there that you should never cheat in the
scales? What giant scale is always there.
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The sky, the store owner should never cheat in his skills. And the only hooked by he needs is to
look out the window. Oh, yeah, this guy.
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Okay, I better be fair in my dealings.
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Because here's the connection now. Because this scale that a lot put in the sky, so long as that is
intact, you have a chance to do the right thing. When a love breaks that scale, is there a day when
a level break that scale of the sky, things will start falling apart? Yeah. When he breaks that
scale, your scale will be raised the scale of your deeds.
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Until that skill is intact, you have a chance to do the right thing. What am I saying in this ayah
is that human beings if they do serious thinking about the universe, then they will learn that they
have to have respect for time, and they have to achieve balance in their life. Two lessons from the
sky. so far. Those are the two items that if I can talk to you about these two lessons, we're
talking about responsibility. What are those two lessons again, from the sun, the moon and the sky,
we are learning number one, to respect time. And number two, to live a life of balance, to have a
scale in our life. So now I'm going to talk to you about balance. I believe personally in my life
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and in your life. And in the life of this oma one of the biggest things missing is balance. We're
missing balance. Men are missing balance. Women are missing balance. Children are missing balance.
Teenagers are missing balance. husbands are missing balance and wives are missing balance. Parents
are missing balance. Employers are missing talents. Employees are missing balance. People are
missing balance. And we each of you has a different scale. They're not all the same scale. So I have
to at least walk you through a few of them. So who should I pick on first? I'll start with husbands.
00:29:54 -->
00:29:55
Sorry
00:29:57 -->
00:29:59
if you're a husband and a father
00:30:01 -->
00:30:15
By the way, how many husbands and fathers at the same time and then the law he went on, I feel your
pain. Okay, but I'm going to pick on us first. Look, we have a lot of things to balance. Your
parents wants your time. Yes.
00:30:17 -->
00:30:44
Your mother wants your attention. Your father wants your time. Your wife wants your time your
children wants your time your job wants your time, mustard wants your time, the learning of Dean
needs your time exercise needs your time, friends need your time, you yourself just to keep your
sanity, need some time for yourself. The commute to work, need some time, keeping up with your job
and you know, learning more needs some time continuing education needs some Oh my god.
00:30:46 -->
00:30:59
There are too many things that need that are pulling at you. Give me give me give me if you imagine
each one of them is a chain on you. You are chained to like 20 things, and each one of them is
pulling at you until
00:31:00 -->
00:31:00
you're torn.
00:31:02 -->
00:31:33
Right. And it's really hard to achieve balance between all of those demands. And we're in the middle
of it. Congratulations. We're in the middle of it. So our children many times feel like we don't
give them enough time. And the wife feels like we don't give her enough time. And some of the wives
are like thank Allah, he doesn't give me enough time. But some other wives are like no, I, he
doesn't spend any time with me doesn't talk to me. He's always busy. He's always on the phone, he's
always on the computer, then your friends are like you never hang out with us. You never give us any
time.
00:31:34 -->
00:31:39
Then you go to Juma and people, the mom says you should learn your deen and you're like I don't give
learning anytime.
00:31:40 -->
00:31:45
Then you go home from work early, and the boss says hey, you don't give the company anytime.
00:31:46 -->
00:31:54
You know, everybody's telling you you're not doing enough. That's the job of a man, congratulations,
nobody will ever be happy with you. That is what we signed up for.
00:31:55 -->
00:31:57
We don't tell our young men that when they're getting married.
00:32:00 -->
00:32:03
Congratulations, no one will ever be happy with you ever again.
00:32:04 -->
00:32:20
But you know what? This balance, finding a balance between all of those poles is your
responsibility. And if you forget that responsibility from today on you, and I should just look at
what
00:32:21 -->
00:32:21
the sky
00:32:22 -->
00:32:40
is look at the sky holla changes life doesn't it? Just the way our the way Allah makes us look at
the world changes. Now for men, I'll tell you something, what happens most of the time is it's not
easy to balance those things. Sometimes you have a really good marriage. Some brothers like
00:32:49 -->
00:32:54
sometimes you have a really good marriage. But your relationship with your father is pretty tough.
00:32:56 -->
00:33:21
Sometimes you have a really good job situation, but your marriage is really tough is not going well.
You know, sometimes your job is okay. Families, okay, but you don't make any time for your friends.
Or you don't do anything really for the dean or something like that. Right. So when this imbalance
happens, you know what most people do? Most people pick the things that they're good at.
00:33:22 -->
00:33:59
Just because you can't be good at everything. So you pick a couple of things that you're good at.
And you start putting most of your time in that. And you start ignoring everything else that's not
convenient, that you're not so good at. So you have a brother who is not very good with his wife.
She's kind of upset with him. Right? So he's going to be the guy that shows up five hours before the
program and starts reorganizing the chairs. And you ask him, what are you doing this? He said he
didn't know if he said he didn't know, the sake of Allah. I'm volunteering, actually. And he's not
even going home after the program is done there must always like please return lights off, please
00:33:59 -->
00:34:00
get out of here. No, no, no, I want to stay here. If
00:34:02 -->
00:34:39
that's you, you got something at home that you're running from. You're not dealing with it. Let's
say you're busying yourself with other things. You're staying late at night hanging out with friends
because you don't want to deal with the upset wife. There's a problem with that. There's a serious
situation our children, people say how do we raise our children right? How do we give them a proper
Islamic education? How do we give make sure that they live by Islam and all of that will lie for
fathers. I'm still picking on fathers. The biggest thing that they need from us is our time. They
just need our time. We need to spend time with them. Our relationships with our children have become
00:34:39 -->
00:34:59
so artificial. The only thing you talk to them about is did you do your homework. How was school and
you don't even wait for the answer. How was school ever did? It was good. Okay. ugly, ugly bad. Did
you eat dinner? Okay, go to sleep better i got i was i was gonna watch the news. Or better I was
gonna watch something that you shouldn't be watching. Go to sleep.
00:35:03 -->
00:35:14
You know, we have a really shallow relationship with our children. We're supposed to be playing
sports with our kids. We're supposed to be hanging out with our children, we should know what their
favorite if you're letting them play video games, you better played with them.
00:35:16 -->
00:35:51
I'm not here to pass you a fatwa. If you're gonna let them play, you better play with them. You
better be better at it than they are. If you're gonna do Street Fighter, do Street Fighter, I don't
care. But do it with them. Don't let them be on their own, you should know their favorite character
is you should know all the special combos you should know this stuff. That's your dad, you should
know this stuff you should know their favorite athlete is, what their favorite sport is who their
best friend is, you should know this stuff. This is your job. As with your boys, especially and also
with your girls, and with your girls, fathers. Look, I feel your pain, guys. I'm not better than you
00:35:51 -->
00:35:54
in this. This is a struggle for me like it is for you.
00:35:55 -->
00:36:11
We have a really hard time paying attention. A lot did not make men capable of paying attention to a
lot of things. So it's a nightmare of a lie that you're sitting here listening. So you're like, What
just happened? Where am I? What is this place?
00:36:13 -->
00:36:22
So we have a hard time paying attention there. You get some of the best sleep of your life during
football tomorrow. Right? So that's, that's just who we are. We come here. The hottie begins in
Alhambra, Linda?
00:36:24 -->
00:36:24
Like, you know?
00:36:26 -->
00:36:39
And then you can miss a lot of time. Oh, yeah. You know, like, that's, that's how we are. But you
know what, and especially with our girls, our girls, they you know, little ones, especially they
talk a lot. They don't stop talking.
00:36:40 -->
00:36:40
And they
00:36:44 -->
00:36:57
don't stop talking. And you know what, you have to actually sit there and listen, you have to
actually listen to all of that book was pay attention and ask interesting questions about what they
just said. Not Aha.
00:36:59 -->
00:37:00
shaba Very good.
00:37:02 -->
00:37:10
That's the most artificial, I'm listening. And the girls know you're not listening. They know you're
like we have very good haha.
00:37:11 -->
00:37:25
They know. They can see right through it. That's why girls are smart. Like one of my daughter's one
time she knew I wasn't listening, right? She's telling me all this stuff. This happened in school.
And that happens like, Mm hmm. And she goes about you promise you give me $25. And I was like, Huh.
00:37:28 -->
00:37:31
And I was like, wait, what, what
00:37:32 -->
00:37:33
is a he.
00:37:36 -->
00:38:14
But they need that we have to find that with them. Don't come home late when the kids already
asleep. Don't do that. Don't be sleeping on the weekend until like 12. And the kids are just sitting
there watching cartoons or whatever. If you don't build a relationship with them at early ages, they
are not going to have a relationship with you by the time they're 1314. They're not, they're not
going to be interested in you in you because that you weren't interested in them. You know, this is
a balance you and I have to find, and especially fathers and daughters, that's a really important
one. I talked about this yesterday. But it starts early. This is a balance we have to find. Now let
00:38:14 -->
00:38:39
me talk to you about some other aspects of balance our wives, many of them are very unhappy with us.
They are very unhappy. And you get angry at them. I pay the bills, I go to do the work. I provide
everything. Look at this light. I turn it on, I turn it off. You see, you know why? Because I do all
the work. Now let me watch CNN, like and she says you don't give me an onion. You're like, Why are
you always talking to your friend? Or you're always on the phone with her. Never get off the phone
with her.
00:38:40 -->
00:38:41
Cuz you don't want to talk to her?
00:38:42 -->
00:39:21
How was how was working? I just work. I don't want to complicate your small brain would work you
know, just just why don't you just cook or something. Just let me let me deal with work, okay, you
don't worry about it. Come on. If you keep neglecting them in conversation, then obviously they're
going to be frustrated with you. They don't feel like they're a partner in in your affairs. Some of
the most crisis situations in the prophets life Salalah alayhi wa sallam, he got the Omaha meaning
involved. He got the mothers of the believers involved and some of the most crisis situations. I
learned this actually I learned this later on in life in my in our organization. When I'm about to
00:39:21 -->
00:39:28
hire somebody. I do the interview and I'm about to hire someone I actually consult my wife but up
before I make the final decision.
00:39:30 -->
00:39:39
You know, I value her input. I also want to show you know what it actually helps the it puts Baraka
in the work I do at work, but it also puts a lot of other kinds of home.
00:39:40 -->
00:39:57
This is important, making them feel included. And part of that balance. Guys. Now this is the hard
part. You have to have my recommendation. This is not from our Dean, but it's my personal
recommendation. My recommendation is you should have one day at least in the week where you take
care of the kids and they get to hang out with their friends.
00:39:58 -->
00:39:59
One day in the week
00:40:00 -->
00:40:03
Where you're taking care of all the kids I know sounds like odd, I know.
00:40:04 -->
00:40:22
And they get to just socialize with their friends. And what that does is two things. One, it gives
them room to breathe, because it's hard taking care of kids, too. It gives you an appreciation of
how hard it is to take care of children. When you have to take care of children, just by yourself
for one hour.
00:40:23 -->
00:40:33
No, let's not make one hour that's too long. 20 minutes 20 minutes, you will feel like you are
running out of oxygen. Where have you been? It's been like five hours.
00:40:35 -->
00:41:05
I thought you're going to talk to them and meet your friends and come back. Are you coming back next
week, what is going on here? I haven't even left I was just leaving hasn't even five minutes. For
you. It's very hard. And that's actually an indication that you haven't spent enough time with your
children. That's why you're not comfortable spending 100% of your time without any, you know, female
supervision with them. It's kind of hard. This is part of balance. Your mother wants to spend time
with you. But your wife says don't go to your mother's house.
00:41:07 -->
00:41:11
Your mother, you go to your mother's house, hey, I never want to see your wife, I hate her.
00:41:14 -->
00:41:33
And you're these two women, I don't know what happened. You don't want to know what happened. But
they hate each other. They really, really hate each other. And guess what? They're not going to tell
each other that they hate each other? Who are they going to tell all the time, you one year over
here when you're over here.
00:41:34 -->
00:41:38
And you're going to have to balance the insane rage of two women.
00:41:40 -->
00:41:47
You know, and you have to show both of them love and every time you go and you forget to call your
mother. She says your wife told you not to call me half
00:41:49 -->
00:41:51
a new one it and knew it.
00:41:52 -->
00:41:56
And then you go spend a little 20 minutes at your mom's house your wife calls, why don't you just
live there then?
00:42:00 -->
00:42:28
And in the middle of it all. And they asked why are you balding, so fast than you know? Why are you
losing your hair so quickly? Well, here's how you do something about that. First of all, you because
you have to maintain the sanity of your household. You have to learn to not get frustrated with your
women, with your mother, with your wife, with your father, etc. So you, you should not get
frustrated with them. So if your mother says I hate your wife, he says, Yeah, we should kill her
together.
00:42:30 -->
00:42:30
Let's do it.
00:42:33 -->
00:42:39
If your wife says never talk to your mother again, like yeah, you're right. I you know what? Never,
I'm deleting her number right now.
00:42:41 -->
00:42:42
You know,
00:42:43 -->
00:42:45
can I delete your mother's number two.
00:42:51 -->
00:43:19
But you have to learn to joke it off a little bit. You if they have a lot of tension, you have to
release the tension. You have to release the tension. And you cannot and part of this balance. And
we haven't learned this and much of the oma, you did not marry a servant, you married a wife. You
married someone who is somebody whose daughter and they used to protect her and take care of her and
give her dignity. And now that became your responsibility. You did not marry a maid for your mother.
00:43:20 -->
00:43:56
You did not marry a servant for your mother. That's not our Deen. You cannot tell her just to you
know, treat your mother like you treat your mother, you owe your mother, you or your mother, your
wife doesn't owe your mother You have to this is part of balance. She has a harp on you. And she has
she's responsible to you, you cannot make her do things that she's that's not even part of the
agreement. So you're going to do this for my mother, you're gonna massage your feet, you're gonna do
this and you're gonna do that, and you're gonna get treated like garbage, because we've watched
enough Indian movies to know that that's how things are supposed to be. And they get going on here
00:43:57 -->
00:44:41
is because of the sweat and tears of your father. And the set the sacrifices of your mother Show
some respect, show a little bit of respect for what they've gone through. You know, it's not easy
earning a living. It's not you try doing it. You try doing it if you think it's that easy. Stop
being a baby and asking for and is throwing tantrums and having attitude problems. Learn to be act
like mature adults. You know, as far as I was telling the younger group earlier as far as our
religion is concerned, if you are if you reached maturity. In other words, if you reached the age of
puberty, men and women, as far as our Deen is concerned, you are adults, you better start acting
00:44:41 -->
00:44:51
like it. Stop acting like just because your friends around you are acting like children doesn't mean
you have to. And if the friends around you are really mature, find older friends.
00:44:52 -->
00:44:58
Honestly find older friends. There's no harm in that and spend time with older people that will
mature you faster.
00:45:00 -->
00:45:14
Spend time with them. If your dad's running a business, spend time with him at the business, it will
mature you faster. If the if your mom goes to a Hanukkah with older ladies, go join it, it's going
to be boring for a little while, but then you will mature, you'll learn from the wisdom of elders,
it'll make you smarter.
00:45:15 -->
00:45:29
It'll make you more mature this is these are important things. And so now I'm giving advice to the
teenage boys in particular, and the young young men in particular, please listen to this carefully.
based on my personal experience, this is advice only based on my personal experience.
00:45:31 -->
00:45:40
Honestly, my parents because of financial reasons and job reasons, they had to leave the United
States when I was young when I was about 1718 years old.
00:45:41 -->
00:46:04
So we have to make it my sister just got married my older sister, she was living in New Jersey, I
was going to college, and I had a job in New York, but I live with my family. But they had to make
the decision to go back. And because of my education, they decided that I should stay back in New
York by myself. So I'm a guy that 1718 years old, by myself living in New York City.
00:46:05 -->
00:46:28
I have no parental supervision, I can do whatever I want in the day, and whenever I want at night, I
can do whatever I want with my time, nobody's going to check on me. Nobody's gonna check who I
called, or who I text message, or what websites I visit, or who I hang out with, or what I listen
to, or what I watch, nobody's gonna check. I have no supervision over me none.
00:46:29 -->
00:46:37
On top of that, I'm making my own money. I don't know anybody money. I have my own job. I'm earning
it myself. I'm completely independent.
00:46:38 -->
00:46:44
That that age, independence and New York City are not a good combination.
00:46:46 -->
00:47:03
That's not a good combination. That is a lethal combination. You understand? You know, the, and I
didn't survive that because I'm some righteous person. I did it. I survived that only and only
because I was too busy to do something stupid.
00:47:04 -->
00:47:05
Too busy.
00:47:06 -->
00:47:26
I was taking 12 credits in college, I was working 40 hours a week, and a little empty time I had
somehow I developed the interest to one to learn Arabic. So I was I used to have 20 hour days. I got
four hours of sleep a day. And I was loving it. I was exhausted. I didn't have time to be an idiot.
00:47:27 -->
00:47:30
You know, the biggest crisis of young men today.
00:47:31 -->
00:47:32
free time.
00:47:33 -->
00:47:37
You got free time and it's just trouble. And you don't have to be in New York City.
00:47:39 -->
00:47:43
The internet is widely available. Hmm. New York City can come to you.
00:47:45 -->
00:48:29
Our young men have to do work. If they're too young to get a job, put them in an internship. If
they're old enough, put them in the business with you have them sit in the office with you make them
do make them make photocopies or do something else. keep them busy. Keep young men busy exhaust
them. If they don't want to do work, put them in sports. Don't have them sit idle, young men sitting
idle, you are guaranteed to have trouble. It's not you might have trouble. You will have trouble.
There is no other way of thinking about it. There's no there's no second option. It is absolutely
guaranteed. Absolutely guaranteed. young guys, you want to save yourselves get a job early.
00:48:30 -->
00:48:47
What's the earliest age you can get a job in this country? I don't know what that is. 18? I don't
know. Is it a second you turn 18 get a job. I don't care if you're changing tires at a tire shop.
Get a job. I've gone through maybe 15 jobs in my youth, but just means I got fired a lot.
00:48:49 -->
00:48:54
But regardless, it saved me and the other thing it does let me tell you what a job does it makes a
man are you.
00:48:56 -->
00:49:05
When you get yelled at by your boss man. When you get paid almost nothing for doing like
backbreaking work, you got respect for money.
00:49:06 -->
00:49:24
You got respect for what you earn. You get a new respect for your father. You get new respect for
them taking care of an entire household. You don't complain anymore that they didn't get you the
newest toy and the newest video game because you know what it takes to earn that kind of money.
00:49:25 -->
00:49:39
New respect. I had a very wealthy friend who who son smart kid, he graduated high school. A student
you know got a got into a college and his father was so proud of him bought a BMW, brand new
00:49:40 -->
00:49:42
three series. Nice car.
00:49:43 -->
00:49:44
crashed it in two months.
00:49:45 -->
00:49:46
Oops.
00:49:47 -->
00:49:50
Dad yelled at him. Cars beyond repair.
00:49:52 -->
00:49:56
a month or two went by convinced his father to buy him a Lexus.
00:49:58 -->
00:49:59
Six months go by a crash that too.
00:50:01 -->
00:50:12
Then the father called me and said, What should I do to cars? This boy's already destroyed. I was
like, Why you are so smart? If you were not smart, you wouldn't be making that kind of money. Why
are you so dumb with your child?
00:50:13 -->
00:50:16
What happens to your brain? stopped?
00:50:17 -->
00:50:19
things, tell them earn it yourself.
00:50:20 -->
00:50:21
Go buy your own car,
00:50:22 -->
00:50:29
go get a job. So this boy gets a job. He worked at the gap, folding t shirts.
00:50:30 -->
00:50:41
Right? He's earning minimum wage and he's putting Dollar After Dollar together until he gets about
$2,000 together and he bought like a 1988 Buick
00:50:44 -->
00:50:55
and he's shining that thing every day and he's he loves he takes pictures of it and he's it's never
crashed it stays under the speed limit. even give it a name?
00:50:57 -->
00:50:58
Basanti
00:51:02 -->
00:51:19
Why, why did he Why did he have such so much respect for this guy, it's the ugliest car he has. He
had a Lexus before this. He had a BMW before this is a hideous car. But you know what this was from
his own earnings, his respect for it. We have to give our kids respect for money.
00:51:21 -->
00:52:01
You know, if they if we keep giving them things they will not have respect for money. They won't
have respect for money is really important. We do that. You know, the same thing with with girls, if
you can find work, do it. If not, volunteer, volunteer to hospital work, volunteer to clinic, help
out at a shelter. Do things please keep yourself busy, especially at that critical age. And it will
save you from a lot A lot, a lot of trouble. These are some things about balance and responsibility
that I wanted to highlight. I just want to leave you guys with the following. If we saw how to love
we raise our children, we want the best for our children. And we want them to have the best things
00:52:01 -->
00:52:18
in life. Sometimes you feel like I'm earning all this money. What's the point of it if I can give my
children a good life? Right. So you buy them things and you get them things out of love for them.
Obviously, it's a natural feeling that a parent has. But I am telling you that if you keep buying
things for your children, then you are actually poisoning them.
00:52:19 -->
00:52:52
You're actually hurting them not helping them. I'm not saying you shouldn't buy things for your
children, but you should taper it off. And you should not make it like a regular thing. Where they
just become greedy and what this they all they do is they want from you. And all you all they are
all you are to them is a cash register. That's a sad state. You know, that's not where you and I
want to be the best thing I keep saying it. I keep seeing it. I keep saying it the best thing you
can give your children as time go to Ramadan with them.
00:52:54 -->
00:53:01
No Ramadan regularly with them. You have zero such a awesome evening, can you I can't tell you what
I would give to be able to go to Omaha with my children.
00:53:03 -->
00:53:28
How awesome that would be. And you guys can do that like jello, gelatin gelatin gelatin is get up
and go. So easy for you take advantage of that. Do road trips with them, do activities with them.
You know, if you have the means travel with them, it builds a bond. And especially fathers, I'll
tell you fathers one last time, if you take if you have a lot of children, because we're Muslims, so
you know, chances are,
00:53:29 -->
00:53:31
but if you take a couple of your children,
00:53:32 -->
00:53:36
just you and two of your children, three of your children and you go on a trip
00:53:37 -->
00:54:12
and spend time with them. 24 seven, you're responsible for them sleeping, waking up eating, drinking
everything mom's not around, it will even if you do that for five days, six days, 10 days, whatever,
it will build a real connection with you and your children. It's really important. Make time to do
that. Even if you don't go somewhere exotic. It doesn't matter if you just go like down the street
somewhere. Go stay at a friend's cousin's house or something, do something like that. But do make
the time outside of your regular routine with your children. It builds that bond, I wanted to
highlight only family responsibilities. There are more things I wanted to talk to you about like
00:54:12 -->
00:54:45
work responsibilities and balance at the workplace. paying your employees fairly right. paying your
taxes fairly. not cheating in you know your your financial transactions, not lying in financial
reports. Not over billing people when you're a consultant. Right? So you build them for 500 hours
but you only did 200 hours of work but it's okay. What about the slip it in? That's also a part of
losing balance. We have to become a lot of old filmyzilla and what our team will do was double
pistola
00:54:46 -->
00:54:56
to either dedicated of making sure we stay on balance I pray that Allah azza wa jal makes us a
balanced oma and people that are trying to find you know,
00:54:57 -->
00:54:59
if you find a way to give equal rights to
00:55:00 -->
00:55:37
Every side that I pray that we have balanced husbands and balanced wives and balanced children and
you know balance parents in this entire oma and I pray Allah azza wa jal accepts all of the efforts
that we do. Thank you so very much for listening to me these last couple of nights before I take a
few questions from you guys. I just wanted to make one quick announcement if you can pay attention
in sha Allah tala, and that is that I might my mission, some of you are familiar already. My mission
in life is to try to make two things easy for the oma, I'd like to make the Arabic language easy for
Muslims. I think for a long time, we've been intimidated by this language, and we there's a way to
00:55:37 -->
00:56:15
learn it without being scared of it. It's it's easy, Allah made it easy. And one of my missions is
to help you know, make it easy for as many Muslims across the world learn this language as best as
possible. The second thing I'd like to do is to help the oma understand at least the basics of the
Quran. And eventually, even at the at the deepest levels, I want to be able to explain it to you and
to highlight to you what's missing in translation. There are so many wonderful things in the Quran
that we just overlook, right? And they're so beautiful that when you find them out, you're like,
wow, I was missing this. I could have you I could really use this in my life, you know. So I
00:56:15 -->
00:56:51
discovered those things for myself. And I felt like the oma should know people should know about
this, and I don't feel enough is being done. And I'm not saying I'm the only one you can learn from,
but I'm saying that inshallah, if I can start a trend, maybe others far more talented than myself
can come along and further this awareness of the Quran. So I'm trying to put an effort together with
at least a family an average Muslim family that's not super knowledgeable, that isn't versed in
Arabic, you don't know what that seed is necessarily. Maybe you have a translation of the Quran at
home, and chances are you found that confusing to read many times. If that's your scenario, I'd like
00:56:51 -->
00:57:33
to be able to teach you the entire Quran in simple language, especially paying attention to the
parts that are really confusing in translation. You know, what are those parts in particular mean?
So for that effort, I my team and I have dedicated ourselves to building a video library of Quran
studies, and a video library of Arabic studies. The Quran studies video library from beginning to
end it's called the cover to cover project and it's on being a TV, but you know.tv some of you are
subscribed to that and some of you this is the first time you're hearing about it. My request to you
is that tonight inshallah tada you guys check it out. Those of you that have it please share the
00:57:33 -->
00:58:10
information with others share the resource that you have with friends and family. Many of you are
benefiting from it and many of you are not my hopes are as many people across the world benefit from
this resource as possible. I'm doing things like parenting from the Quranic perspective, the entire
series on it shame from the Quranic perspective higher entire series on it, I eventually am going to
do you know, women heroes in the Koran, entire series on it and things that I need, I want to have
these things available for my daughters. And if my daughters will benefit them, the daughters of the
oma will benefit. I believe it I believe that, why should I restrict that to my own child? You know,
00:58:10 -->
00:58:45
I have concern for all of our children. That's what we're supposed to have a shared concern for the
oma the same thing. I really want to teach my children Arabic, but I could have just told her
myself, but I decided to record the classes. I teach my dog, my 10 year old daughter like Arabic
grammar and to understand the Quran, and some of you are following Arabic with hosting online, it's
all there on Vienna TV. So I want you to be able to access this resource and inshallah Tada, over
the years benefit more and more from it. One of the exciting things I want to tell some of you might
not know or do know, we have a full time Arabic studies program back in Texas, where I'm from, and I
00:58:45 -->
00:58:57
most of my years spent teaching that I take 60 students, and I beat Arabic into them. And I'm not
like this when I'm in class. I'm a very mean teacher, you know, because
00:58:58 -->
00:59:34
Dallas, and Dallas, right, so it's a nine month program. And it's hard for you folks to come all the
way out there. And it's I can understand that. And now there's a demand for that kind of a program
to exist all over the world. So I'm hoping within the next year and a half, I put the machinery in
place to be able to replicate that program all over the place and in places like Bali and inshallah
tada so that the working professionals here, the mothers here, the women and the men here, the youth
and the adults here that are interested in Quranic Arabic can take advantage of our successful
curriculum. It's already helped 1000s of people in the US why can it help other people all over the
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00:59:51
world? Why not in Charlottetown, and I'm hoping to produce teachers from within you like to take a
few of you train them, and then start them off in your own communities in shallow data when the time
is right. I need about a year and a half to put all those things in place. But I'm announcing that
to you now. So you guys remember that project and you're
00:59:52 -->
01:00:00
now we're able to do that in shallow tada for the men in our community and the women in our
community here. It was just an hour
01:00:00 -->
01:00:17
Absolute pleasure, pleasure getting to talk to you guys today. I hope you guys benefited from
today's conversation. I can only take three or so questions from the brother side. And three or so
questions from the sister side. We'll go one and one. Try to be as loud as you possibly can. When
you ask, show of hands. Anybody on the guy side? Yes.
01:00:27 -->
01:00:28
This is from the sisters.
01:00:34 -->
01:00:37
Okay, what's the relationship?
01:00:39 -->
01:00:59
Good questions. It's been said that there are no rights without responsibilities, and there are no
responsibilities without rights. And what do you think about that? I think a lot of things about
that. First of all, let's talk about our relationship with Allah. Okay, Allahu Allah buena Eliza
rub, which makes us right. And by definition, ABA has no rights.
01:01:00 -->
01:01:05
And employer, moreover, has rights and has rights, but
01:01:07 -->
01:01:11
has no rights. Yes. But it like gives us gifts anyway.
01:01:12 -->
01:01:49
So Allah has all the rights and we have none of the rights. I don't have a right to have two arms. I
don't have a right to have two legs. I don't have that. Right. There's a gift from Allah, you
understand. But within human relationships, yes, there are rights. And there are responsibilities.
So in a marriage, I have certain rights as a husband, and I have some responsibilities as a husband,
you have certain rights as a wife and certain responsibilities as a wife, you have rights as
children, responsibilities as children, it's always going to be there. However, what is the
relationship between them, this is the important part in every one of those relationships. And every
01:01:49 -->
01:01:55
one of those relationships. The mistake people make is they're always looking for their rights.
01:01:56 -->
01:02:32
That's the mistake they make. Children are looking for their rights. Parents are looking for their
rights, husbands are looking for their rights, wives are looking for their rights. And everybody
says if I get my rights, I will fulfill my responsibilities. Right? That's the mentality for most
people. And guess what? When you have that mentality, when the husband says, I will get I will give
my responsibilities when I get my rights. And the wife says while I will give my responsibilities
when I get my rights, both of you will have a miserable marriage. Chances are you're Pakistani
right, that's
01:02:34 -->
01:02:35
that's what that's what that's gonna do.
01:02:36 -->
01:02:42
The right way to go about this. She got for me questions, man.
01:02:43 -->
01:02:44
I got a flight. Yeah.
01:02:45 -->
01:03:10
So the right way to think about this is Muslims have to concern themselves with their
responsibilities, and they have to stop expecting their rights. have to stop expecting your rights.
And by the way, when you lose your expectations, then you only start expecting from Allah. And then
even if you get a little bit, you're really happy. And when you keep expecting from people, you're
always disappointed.
01:03:11 -->
01:03:19
This is gonna leave you to be miserable all the time. because let me tell you, yeah, there's no
there's no way your husband's gonna be meeting your expectations.
01:03:21 -->
01:03:25
I believe that that's the first thing he said that I agree with you.
01:03:26 -->
01:03:30
There's no way but if you stop it, stop it. No.
01:03:32 -->
01:03:32
I'm not gonna stop.
01:03:34 -->
01:03:34
No.
01:03:36 -->
01:03:39
Are they gonna turn the lights off? Is that what they're gonna do? Oh, yeah. Okay.
01:03:40 -->
01:03:43
So I'll start with that question. There's two more questions.
01:03:44 -->
01:03:46
Some of them I'm from Dallas, Texas.
01:03:48 -->
01:03:57
I would like to know should we force children seven eight to nine years old to pray when they don't
want to? Why don't they want to what is wrong with you? What have you been doing?
01:03:58 -->
01:04:01
And what what do you mean forced them to pray? You can encourage them to pray.
01:04:02 -->
01:04:04
You could Yes.
01:04:05 -->
01:04:05
Okay.
01:04:21 -->
01:04:27
Yeah, no, it's at that age. I would I actually believe in being forceful a little bit.
01:04:28 -->
01:05:00
Like a measured forceful not like a super crazy like, you know, slap you across the room forceful,
but forceful enough that they say okay, mom serious. I better pray. And you can't say well, then
they're praying for the sake of mom and not for the sake of Allah. At a certain age. They have to do
that they have to pray for the sake of meeting mom's expectations. And as they mature, they'll thank
you for building that habit into them. Right. So that it's important to be we be a little bit of an
authority. We can't be softies on all of our parenting. You can't do that. Okay, one last question.
You
01:05:00 -->
01:05:08
Talking about responsibility. What is the responsibility each Muslim has towards the Quran? How much
minimum Quran should we read daily? Oh, that was my last question. Okay, fine.
01:05:09 -->
01:05:15
Okay, how much? Should we read daily as much as you can, as much as you can, but don't
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01:05:46
keep talking about balance, right? Find a time in your day where you can give to a large book. My
recommendation is after fudger before fudger around that time, 10 1520 minutes if you can recycle on
your good. Even if you can't, if you can't give 20 minutes give 10 minutes. The oma is at such a low
point. I don't want to put high expectations on you just start somewhere, read something, read
something from the last book. You know, and you guys get stuck in traffic a lot, I'm guessing. Yes.
So I have beneficial things to listen to in the car.
01:05:47 -->
01:06:00
Have recitation to listen to go through a sutra that you're memorizing over and over again. Listen
to it that seat in the car something keep keep that up as I have it in shallow tada and the car.
Okay, last question. And I'm gone.
01:06:02 -->
01:06:17
Just like Hello, Clayton, for each and every word that you deliver. My question is, how can we
strike a balance among non methylome colleagues and family? You live in a non Muslim country? were
shaking hands showing respect. So how can we say no without hurting them?
01:06:18 -->
01:06:20
Was it about you or me?
01:06:22 -->
01:06:23
But
01:06:24 -->
01:06:31
look, we're I mean, at least in the United States, we're a pretty free society, right? So you could
do pretty much anything you can shake feet.
01:06:32 -->
01:06:44
And even the silliest things, so when when you know a woman sticks out her hand, some people are
comfortable with shaking her hand and they'll quote a fatwa or something and whatever. I'm
personally not comfortable.
01:06:46 -->
01:07:21
shaking hands with women. I'm not giving you a fatwa. I'm just saying, I'm personally not
comfortable. And I'll just say, you know, I just, we have this thing in our family where we only, we
only touch women within our family, and we have too much respect for women outside to we don't have
the privilege to be able to touch them. It's a thing. It's a Muslim thing. You know, so I instead of
turning it into something like you, you can't hear I can't touch you. I turned it into Listen, just
out of respect for women, unless they're in our family, we don't get that we don't have the right to
touch them and say, I hope you can respect that. And they do. We just got to find a smart way of
01:07:21 -->
01:07:31
saying things. You know, you don't have to just say, you know, well, we believe in them and we
should equal and majus. We believe that Timo shikun are filth, and you clearly are mushnik.
01:07:33 -->
01:07:42
So you're lucky I don't have a gas mask on right now to tolerate your presence. And therefore
shaking my hand is out of the question. But here's my sock, you can shake that.
01:07:43 -->
01:07:48
That's another way of going. You decide which one suits your personality.
01:07:50 -->
01:08:01
Thank you so very much. Everybody's like come alongside him for listening. I have to rush out of
here because I have to catch a flight tonight. And if I don't, I am going to be the beehive at home.
So
01:08:02 -->
01:08:09
please make lots of art for me. I'll be making lots and lots of draw for you on my trip back. Be
responsible people some article
