Hitting Women A Look at 434 & Beyond #02

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Nouman Ali Khan

Channel: Nouman Ali Khan

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Every minute volum or Mocha just somebody's been an alum from Oct T and another finance guru who I will Masai comanage guru who Allah Nam Salli ala Rasulillah, Accra, the shara, Phylicia Mia noodle.

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Well kita Bill welcome. Well Kamal in between our heart and say the weather the item under the under the bus Shalabi here receptor Maria with Olivia Sati Ibrahim alayhis salam in a currently offer we will cover a debate in Lahore haram for sallallahu alayhi wa sallam while he hated Omen, a Latina BarakAllahu be him Gafford and NASA la Birmingham Elijah. For hamdulillah Allah de la mia Taka is well done with me Aquila, who Shari confirmed wolky with me Aquila, holy human only what can be hota Camilla? What hamdulillah under the Angela Allah Abdi him kita well image Allah whoever will hamdulillah Allah the Nakamoto who when I said you know when I started when we went to work, he when

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I wrote below him and Shuri and fusina Omen sejati Malita when you had to hit Allahu Allah mobila woman you follow her the Allah when the Chateau La ilaha illallah wa hula Shan eCola when the shadow Ana Mohammed Abdullah he Rasulullah sallallahu Taala Buddha within you fella who Allah Deen equally water Fabula he Shahida for sallallahu alayhi wa seldom at the Sleeman Kathira and Kathira Ahmedabad in that circle Hadith he Kitab Allah but how you al Hadi Have you Mohammed in some Allahu alayhi wa sallam were in natural Ohmori matter to how we're in Nikola Tesla Tenba are cooler with atom Bala Akula voila that's it for now. Allah azza wa jal vikita Karim an Akula bIllahi min ash shaytani R

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rajim.

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Regina Luca Muna Allen Nisa, EB ma football Allah Hobart Bahama Bob will be my infomine I'm Wally him for Sally how to call it out on half Ivatan ABB Mahaffey Allah we're lucky to have food and shoes Ohana ferry, Vahana Johanna Phillimore budgetary, Audrey buena for in Atlanta comfortable la hinda Sabina in Allah Kana Ali and Gabriela from Shahe Sabri were silly Emery looked at me listening Coco Lee, Alma Tabitha and the multi billion Ilaha illa Allah homage I lamina Latina Amman and when I mean to study hard, but also be happy whatever Sabi sub mineral banana mean. Today's the second installment of this ongoing series of hot days I've dedicated to Ira number 34 of pseudo Nyssa and

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onwards. This IRA as I mentioned last time is at the center of a lot of supposes controversy about Islam's role in Islam stance towards women. The particular phrase that a lot of people pick on and create a lot of noise about is hitting women while the evil one nine strike them that occurs inside of this IRA. And I introduced last time that I'm going to dedicate a series of goodbyes to each phrase in this IRA and beyond, to help us contemplate these words of ALLAH to understand them properly, and to do justice by them. Because as a believer, you and I are never ashamed of anything that Allah says. In fact, we stand by it with pride. And it's also important that we not only stand

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by the word of Allah, but we understand it properly before we stand by it, we don't, you know, engage in a shallow or a half baked interpretation of what Allah is saying, or a biased interpretation of what Allah is saying, driven by our fear, or by our own cultural bias or whatever and we read that into the Word of Allah, and then we interpret or present something and we pass that off as Allah himself speaking. So my prayer to Allah my sincere dua to Allah, for myself and for all of you is that we engage the word of Allah with humility, that we engage the word of Allah sincerely and he opens the doors of his the wisdom and understanding onto our hearts so that we're able to not

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only understand His word clearly, but able to express its meanings to others clearly as well which is part of the role that we have in this oma in the Latina taboo, but they you know, we like to bother him Why not ah, Rahim? Allah says, the you know, the people who don't fall under Allah's curse are people who repented and they they fixed themselves. And then they clarified meaning clarified well actually says, right so clarifying what Allah says, is part of our our journey to being those that Allah accepts there, Toba and may Allah accept all of us from among those people. So last time I spoke to you about the Gianluca Muna Allah Nisa, that men are Kawan over women and

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the entire hobo was dedicated on the meanings of the word column. As a brief overview, it is people that are committed men are committed caretakers, and maintainers and protectors, of women, those all of those meanings, nourishing, protecting, taking care of and being committed to all come within the meanings of the word karma. And the mobila for means they demonstrate that role towards women over and over and over again. Ignore Assura Himalayan is famous, deceived, to hurried with and we made a very precise analysis of the language of this first phrase, because it sets the tone for the rest of the idea

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and he mentioned

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And that in the Quran when Allah refers to husbands, Husbands or when he refers to wives, then the Botha is used so nisab will come for example, or will that ohana, for example, there's an attribution we saw with some of the old husbands with Hannah, etc. Okay, but here we find our visual our Muna Anissa we don't even find a Regina, Luca Mona Lisa em, men are maintainers over their wives. It's over women. And in doing so Allah has actually even later on the IRA will narrow the scope to husband and wife. He started with the larger point that I made last time and I'm going to reinforce this time. That is that as a man, Allah made me the caretaker protector, and maintainer of

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my mother, my sister, and all the women in my family, like as a man, Allah didn't just make me responsible for my wife, he made me responsible for the women in my family. So he gave me this protective role. He gave me this caretaking role. And he gave me a role to make sure everybody all the females in my family that direct females in my family are okay. That includes my daughter, that includes my sister, that includes my mother, that includes my grandmother, etc. I have this direct role to play with them. This is why the prophets I seldom would even say about your aunt, meaning your mother's sister, a holla to be highlighted on that your highlight your maternal aunt is like

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your mother, she's the same study you should give her the same love with reverence, respect care, as your mother. Now so that's that's the first precedent that has been set in the Quran, the responsibility has been given to men over women in general, in our deen men are responsible for them. And this is why what I look at the Salah, it was stupid, it makes sense. Tell your family to pray and stay firm on that yourself. Right? So you're responsible for them in every way, even in their religious nourishment, you're responsible. So as a son, for instance, it is my responsibility that if my own mother was doing something haram Alhamdulillah she's not but in in the theoretical

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case, that she was that somebody's mother is engaged in a haram business, for example, or doing a lot of rebar or something else, that as her son, my job is to take care of her not only in this world, but also make sure that she's not throwing herself into trouble in the next world. So I need to sit my mom down, no matter how angry she gets. And I have to tell her mom that needs to stop that's LIBOR. And that's no good for you. And whether you like to hear this from me or not, the angels are recording it. And they you can't yell at them, you can yell at me, but you can't yell at them. Right, and they're gonna record this against you, that needs to go away from your life. And

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I'm saying this to you, because I love you. And you don't just hear you don't do this to your mother in front of other people. Right, you don't just do this tariffs, she's talking about somebody at a party and you just start lecturing your mom in front of everybody hold on a second, the word alone means you protect them, meaning you protect their feelings to you protect their dignity, too. So if you have to correct or find the right time in place, find a mum find a moment where her dad is not listening, you're not listening. And when I told her to,

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though, because that's that's you're embarrassing her now, you have to find a time that safe for her to even corrector. So this the word called rom takes into account that we do not make men do not make passing comments at women in their family. We don't make sarcastic remarks. And it could be that you are on the receiving end of a lot of sarcastic remarks. It could be that your sister makes a lot of comments about you, Hey, Fatty, you're here again, or something. Or your wife makes sarcastic remarks about you. Or at a gathering your mother says things about you or whatever the women in your family, they tend to, they tend to maybe get a more free license to run their mouth

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towards you. Yes, but you know what, you're still go wrong. So you're not going to respond in kind. You're going to respond to patients silence and good advice when it's the right time, when it's the right time. And so it could be for example, those of you that have sisters.

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And you know, your sister might be really good at taunting you or teasing you or saying things and saying things and saying things until it gets under your skin. And eventually you say one thing and she starts crying.

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Like she could be saying the same thing to you 100 times over, and you're taking it and then eventually you've had enough and you turn around and you say one thing to her. You know what you're ugly. You say something? And then she's sitting in a corner crying? I can't believe you said that to me. You know, that really hurt. Really, you see you call me a dinosaur all every day like you. There's all kinds of things to be How come I can't do that? No, because you're Kalaam bro. You're supposed to take care of her. You're human made different. You're given a different task. So even if you want to correct her, you want to stand up for yourself. There's a way to do it. There's a more

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delicate approach that you have to take with all of the women in your family, with your mom, with your sister and everybody and then you know what, what else will happen? And this is again before we even go any further setting the stage sometimes the women in your family hate each other.

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They hate each other. So your wife hates your mother

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or your mother hates your wife, or one sister hates the other sister or whatever, some drama, right? Or the aunt hates this one, or that one or the other one, or your mom hates around his sister. And she says, don't talk to your holla. Right, you could have any version of dramas, every one of us has a different soap opera going on at home, right. So whatever version of that drama is taking place, where women are hating each other, oftentimes, they use You the man as the weapon of choice.

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So you if you love me, you won't talk to her. And if you love me, you won't spend weight with your mom asks you to do groceries, you're gonna do the groceries for her now.

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Seriously, as your dad, like not available to do that, you're gonna do that. And so your wife is not telling you to not do something for your mom. Or your mom is telling you. Oh, so are you listening to your wife again? Hmm, you're gonna take her out for dinner again? How? Oh, I guess you, you work for her? Now? I see how that is. I understand. So mom's training you against your wife. So what happens sometimes is when they have conflicts among each other, you are being used to show you know, loyalty test, right? So you're being pulled in opposite directions. And when you're kalaam, guess what you're going to do? You're going to stand by what's right. Doesn't matter whose feelings get

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hurt, hey, listen, my mom needs help. And I'm going to help her and I still love you. And it takes nothing away from your love. But you know what? You can't No, no, no, if I'm, if I'm taking any of your rights away, let me know. If I'm doing something wrong to you just tell me. And if I'm not, I'm still gonna take care of it. And your mom can hate your wife while she wants. She stole your wife, you still got to protect her. She can yell at you all. She wants your mom, she can't yell at her. Because you're Columbo your wife too. You got to protect her. You sometimes have to protect your wife from your sister, or your sister from your wife, or I or anybody in between. So you're

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basically the rough. You're basically the one that's keeping everybody all you know, at bay. And what a lot of men do often is they see so much drama in the family. They're like, keep me out of it. You know what, I'm just gonna watch the game. You guys kill each other. Let me know whoever survives, give me some pass me some fries. So

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I'm not gonna deal with this. So life comes until you know what your mother said to me today. You know what your sister said to me today? Listen, I don't want to deal with it. Whatever they said, they said, Okay, why don't you Why don't you say something in response. So you don't want to hear it. And then the other side comes, you know what your wife did it mom just enough. I don't want to deal with it. So you check out. You're, you're basically you're there but you're not there. There's a shadow of yourself there. And you just you pretend you to not listen to any of it. That's not you being Kawan.

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That isn't you being calm. Your job is to calm the situation down. Your job is to de escalate. Your job is to settle things and if there is wrongdoing, and sometimes there is wrongdoing. And sometimes wrongdoing can be somebody did something wrong. But the way they told you the story is much more exaggerated than what actually happened, right? So you as a Kawan, what's your job to understand if a wrong was done, if 10% of the wrong was done, you at least have to acknowledge that was wrong. You know, you can skip the exaggerations, that's fine. But just because somebody exaggerated doesn't mean they don't have a legitimate complaint to begin with. You don't get to delegitimize somebody

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else's concern, you're the protector, you're the security, you're, you're the maintainer of peace, you're the maintainer of stability in the home, you have to do these things. And so in order for you to do that, you and I have to take a very delicate role

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says that role will be put to the test over and over and over again. And the wisdom of using the word called wham, which is fire owl is someone who has to accommodate behave more,

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like over and over and over again. Right? So it's tested in different ways all the time. And that's your role as kolomela says, Why are you going? Why have you been put in this role?

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And he's talking to the men he says Be my football Allah Who about boehmite About if ALLAH because ALLAH gave on account of the fact that Allah gave preference to some over others, because Allah gave preference to some over others. This is also profound language. Now let's first think about the word preference. Let's understand the word preference as used by Allah Himself.

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of the nations in the world. Allah chose the nation and preferred them over all other nations. He says, Well, football nakoma Alamy Yeah, but he saw he was Curonian Matteotti and unterlagen Well, me football tucan Alameen remember my favorite on you? And remember that I gave you preference over all other nations of the world? What preference then Allah gave the bunnies sorry, that Allah give them more gold than anybody else that will give them more oil reserves than anybody else, a bigger army than anybody else, that Allah is older, provide them a better economic condition than everybody else know. Allah gave them

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more profits than anybody else, Allah give them more revelation than anybody else and therefore, Allah give them more responsibility than everybody else yes or no. If that's the case, then when Allah prefers someone you know what that means? Allah give them responsibility.

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Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Allah tells him about the messengers of Allah Delica Rusu football da Baba home, Ira Rog, those messengers, we give preference to some over others, the ones who are given more preference study them and what do you find that women as women are also they were given heavier responsibilities?

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So when we hear the word preference, we think, Oh, I'm better. Right? When the Quran says preference, what's the Quran talking about? You've been given a heavier duty,

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you were chosen for a harder task. So when Allah says in this IRB, malformed Allah Allahu Allah, you will prefer to take a harder job,

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you will prefer to take a harder task. This IR is not about the superiority of men is about the greater responsibility of men. Be true to the text, be sincere about Allah is saying, on account of the fact that Allah has given preference to some over others. Now preference in what way in a heavier responsibility kind of way that's why the IR began with the responsibility itself. Why should I be taking care of them? Why shouldn't they be taking care of me?

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Why should I be protected, they should be protecting me. I'm the one paying the bills now going to versus coming. That's the next part. But before then you need to know that you are given this preferential status of being the protector and taking the role of caring and concern yourself with the upkeep of everyone. Because Allah has given you this remarkable honor. Allah chose this Allah. Allah chose the Arabs, Allah chose the Sahaba he gave them tough deal over all of the people in the world. He gave them a model Rasulullah sallallahu. You know what that means? He gave them the heaviest task ever given to anybody else. They became a sobre una Cibachrome. Quran Quran calls him

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the first of the first, the first and foremost, why, because they had the most responsibility, and they carried it. So don't, don't allow yourself and I shouldn't allow myself to separate the notion of responsibility from the notion of preference because the Quran doesn't separate those two things. So I don't get to. So the only thing that therefore, the only thing that makes me preferred in the family is the fact that I'm carrying more responsibility. And by the way, let's go back to the Israelites, when they refuse to carry their responsibilities. They went from being the preferred to the cursed.

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So that was the Sunnah of Allah, He gives you preference. And without preference comes responsibility. When you don't carry that responsibility, you lose your preference, and you instead instead of being the one preferred, you become the one cursed.

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You become the one curse.

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Think about for example, and we will go into it later on. But think about divorce law in Islam. It seems like it's heavy handed, that the man has a favor at first glance, the man can just say the lock and it's over. Well, you could say it. It's done. So it's as easy as the word. Right. So Mazza and like a major advantage, right? So in that advantage, what does it seem like? Well, it seems like he has a formula preference. What am I speaks about this. He gives warnings to men like nobody else. When I talk is why Atilla he was wah wah Angela communicated with Hekmati. I couldn't be with tequila, lagoon. lahmacun Morocco, oh my God over one commandment. And then he says, You better know

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you're gonna meet him. You burn it on make a joke out of Allah's ayat, you better be mindful of Allah, like, none of those threats would have been enough multiple threats. Why? Because you were just given an advantage.

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Which means if you play with this advantage, you're in more trouble than anybody else. I as a man, and I'm in more trouble with Allah than anybody else. Our religion, it makes no sense if you take the Taqwa of Allah out of the equation. If you just have the rules, and those rules are so separated from mindfulness of Allah, then those rules become a means of injustice. Without Allah, it is only with the doctrine of Allah that are deemed delivers justice.

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Then delivers fairness and beauty. So that's what happens here. These are other talked about with one thing missing from the conversation the Taqwa of Allah. It's missing from the conversation what certain certain bizarre has lots of rules. Where does it begin? Yeah, you harness it.

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That's where it begins. So everything you're going to study in certain Nyssa better have the mindfulness of Allah's authority at at in your mind, you're going to put those lenses unless you read everything. None of none of which you get to take your glasses off the stock glasses off. So he says now be about football. Allahu bah bah bah bah. Let's pause here for another

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important. So the first consideration I wanted you to have in this whole bar is the relationship between preference and responsibility. The second consideration is I started, and it was correctly pointed out that the aisle opened up with men being caretakers of women, not husbands and wives alone, mother, sister to everybody. No one here will say, I have a higher preference over my I have I've been preferred over my mother.

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I have a higher rank than my mother, Nobody of us will dare to say that. We know that that our Jada MACOM of the mother, in our team, we know that and Allah says after he mentions worship of Him, He mentioned the Santa parents. And then he goes into elaborates not the worship of Him, not the ExxonMobil parents, he starts talking about what the mother does. So the status of the mother is no joke in our religion, it's a pretty serious thing. So very high, the rank of the mother. So when you read this iron you read because Allah has given preference to some over others. He could have said, because Allah has given them meaning men, preference over women, but he didn't say it like that he

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deliberately created an ambiguity and Abraham. He didn't say be my football Lahoma Allahu Allah hinda be my football home Allah. I know him. Now that would mean because Allah has preferred men over women. He didn't say that he said female football Allah who bought the home about some have been given preference over others. In fact, in my relationship with my mother, Mom has been given preference over me.

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I can earn I can earn Allah's forgiveness, and I can earn the status of your son by being the best of my mother. Hasn't she been given a preference? Allah says Allah Homi Bhabha, whom Allah evolved in Kiki tabula, the relationships of the womb, I have priority in the book of Allah. So what I'm trying to get at is, in some things, men have been given an advantage. In other things, women have been given an advantage. Allah decides in What things does man have an advantage? And in What things does the woman have an advantage and in fact, what he mentions next is an advantage that women have and what's that advantage will be man Falco, minim, Wiley, him, for example, do you have been given

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that preferential responsibility plays, because in your case, you must be the ones that spend because you they spend from their own money, demand for Coleman and rally him? What does that mean in our entire lives, we men have a financial responsibility, not just an emotional and a social and religious responsibility to the women in our lives. But we also have to take different degrees of financial responsibility towards the women in our lives. And you know, as for example, your parents are getting older, right? And you have your three or four brothers and sisters, and your sisters, your only one brother or two brothers, and you know, three sisters, your sisters got married, they

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have their own lives, etc, etc. And the brothers also got married, they have their own lives, etc, etc. In light of these ions, even though you don't your sister send your parents some money sometimes. Yeah. But you know, who's actually charged with doing something financially supporting the parents, not the daughters, who has been charged the sons will be mine fuku minimally him, they have to do that. The sons have to take a role. How many households be fine, the girls are taking their college education seriously. They're getting a job sooner. They're earning and they're paying the bills. They're taking care of the rent of the home, the groceries, everything else paying the

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parents medical bills, and the son is playing Playstation until the age of 29.

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You know, he's he's busy on Call of Duty or something else, there's the the actual call of his duty is gone. There's only like Call of Duty left. You know.

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So, the, this is the spirit of the Quran. And the message of the Quran creates men that are financially responsible.

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They're financially responsible. And then again, go back to aka one, once you're the breadwinner in the home, you okay? You pay all the bills, fine, you got the job, you're making the money, you're paying your responsibility. Okay, now that it's your responsibility, you don't get to decide who gets more or less based on somebody else's feelings. You have to decide who gets what based on the principles Allah has given you.

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So your mom, for example, says I want to throw a very fancy wedding for one of your sisters.

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But you're that money that you want to use to throw a very fancy wedding? Your your daughter's also deserved that money. Your son's also deserved that money. Your wife also deserves that money. You understand? But now your mother says if you love me, then we have to get the Taj Mahal

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We have to get catering from this place that's $40 a plate. And we have to get, you have to rent this car, and we have to fly your relatives in. And we have to get this hotel we have. So your mother's creating this entire thing. And because you're the son, she'll even quote desire or demand for cooling and while he will be valid at Asana, then summer, hon, you're doing you can't even make your mother happy. Look at your sister's, he's crying, and then the sexual pretend cry.

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I don't have a seven star hotel for my third walima. You know, so and now you're taking hard earned money, the rights of which belong with your children, the rights of which much of which belongs with your spouse, your household, and you're doing it for the luxury or the good feeling of your mom. No, no, no, no, no.

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They your mom can compel you to do is laugh. She can compel you to overspend on something that's not a need. Similarly, neither can your wife, neither can your children. Nobody can make you spend on what they think is right? You unfortunately have to be man enough to make that decision.

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And when you make that decision, let me tell you, it might be the situation that once you make that responsible decision, with only allied mind first and justice in mind First, when that happens, then everybody might hate you. Your mother might say your your wife, slave, and your wife might say you're just a mama's boy. And everybody's gonna think that you hate them, but you stood by the right thing.

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And you'll hear all kinds of things and in through hearing all of that you don't become enemy to any of them, you remain calm. Congratulations, nice job you got there. Here, here you were thinking this IR gives me this really nice, you know, lofty, you know, bit first class seat in the family.

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This idea puts us on the hook, we become responsible with our with money decisions. And at the end of the day, we'll be more informed on him because of what they spend from their monies actually now means I have to keep an eye on where money should be going and how it should be going. And sometimes you're not making a lot of money. Sometimes the budget is tight. Sometimes you don't have enough to go around to everybody. And you have to make some tough decisions. And when you make tough decisions, there will always be people who don't like one of your decisions. You have to in those kinds of situations, you have to take for the hula Allah He was really Allah Rasool, like, take it

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take the thing back to Allah and the messenger. I called you, for example, you married your wife. And when you made her, you took responsibility for her. When you became her Welly, when you did that, then you basically told her father, all the protection that you used to give her and all the security that you used to provide her you don't have to worry about that anymore. I'm taking that role. I'm taking that same financial and religious responsibility that once she had under your care, and now you take her from that family, and now you treat her like she serves your mother, or you treat her like she doesn't have any access to any funds or any any of your earnings. Or she she

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needs to just shut up when it comes to your real family. Right? She's just a visitor, then you aren't living by this if I'm not living by the CYA, we have to do justice. And again, this the flip can be true to the flip can be that you marry a woman she you're absolutely crazy about her. And she out of her emotional attachment to you, convinces you that your parents are the enemy.

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Can this is your your father, your mother evil, they're just greedy. They just want your money. You know, they don't love you, right? They just love your money.

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That's all they love.

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They don't care about anything else. And you know what, let's just pretend. For her sake, let's just pretend they only want your money. Let's give her that.

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Even then you be the best of them.

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Even then, first of all, you can decide whose intentions are what.

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Nobody has a microscope to see who wants what in reality. So these judgments, do not listen to these things and poison your thoughts about loved ones, not towards your spouse, not towards your parents, not towards your siblings don't allow that to happen. Why not because you're the one that has to stay standing upright, Guam, so I end with where I started the word karma Yakumo means to stand upright. The word Mala Miu Mr. Lien, okay, Jennifer is to have bias.

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Allah made you and I alum, industry family, where everybody that you love and care for is going to try to pull you towards them. And when they're pulling you towards them, what are they also doing at the same time, pulling you away from someone else? You understand? And your job is to get pulled by everybody and stay standing straight. You gotta you gotta stand straight. You can't be pulled by anybody. So we'll be my unfuckable men um while him financial responsibility

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goes to us. We have to spend our monies. And because we have to spend our monies, and we have to take care, then this, this is the flip side of it. Now this is what men have to do. And the brothers will listen to me and say that mashallah great football about making men feel bad? What about the women? Are they well, I don't have to worry about that Allah takes care of it. So what's happening in the next part of the IoD of this idea is actually well, this is what men must do. And this is their responsibility. Well, what's women's responsibility? What do they have to do? And the rest of this is going to be on this next portion of the AI is going to be what do women have to do? How will

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they live up to this idea? Where do they stand when they win the measure of this is given. So we have to judge ourselves, look ourselves in the mirror and judge ourselves by the standard that Allah has revealed. Notice, I started by saying this is the idea that many people use at the heart of controversy, right? It's politically incorrect IRA. There's symposia. Western academics have symposia on this idea to discuss the problem of Sharia law, and how barbaric it is, and look at how profoundly and beautifully the wisdom of Allah has put men in a position where they can stand up right and live a good life. Because when you stand up, right, your family is going to be okay.

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You're going to regulate everybody's emotions to you're going to be the source of stability, you're going to be the anchor in the family, everybody else calms down, because you are the source of calm. You're there. And that's, that's once that position is set, then we're ready for the next conversation. So the next next week is going to be about what are women supposed to do? Now I know some of the people physically sitting in the audience are like, I'm gonna make sure my wife attends next week.

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But the idea still, we so the last thing I'll share with you is as follows look, we love we love REITs. And we hate responsibilities. It's just the thing. I love the paycheck, I just hate the job. That's just how it works. You know?

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What, every everything in life, I love what I get. But I hate what I got to give.

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So what we do in Islam, we bring that bias. And we love hearing in Islam, the stuff that we get.

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And we hate hearing in Islam, the things we have to give and the moment we hear what we have to do, or in our mind to flex and says, Yeah, but what about what they have to give? Are you gonna keep talking about what I have to give? What about what they have to give, you know what that is, that's a way of you demonstrating a really demonstrating that I don't want to take my responsibility seriously, I just want to hear about what I'm going to get.

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So let me clarify something for you, whether you get what you deserve or not.

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Okay, and let's talk about the worst case scenario, let's say you will not get what you deserve. Let's say you will not get what you deserve. You being men, being a warm over women, is not conditional.

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on them being a certain way with you.

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You're not being Kalaam over them, because they are this way with you or that way with you. You're being calm over them. And I'm being calm over them. Because Allah mandated that for me. So it is not dependent on what they do. It doesn't depend on what they do. It doesn't depend on the kindness or the roughness of your mother,

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or the gentleness or the bitterness of your wife or your sister. It doesn't depend on any of that you are Kawan because Allah told you your co well.

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It's not a reciprocal thing. You that and that's a clear thing we have to understand. When Allah is talking to me about my responsibilities. I wouldn't dare say okay, yeah, well, let's balance the vision a little bit. No, no, no. Let's hear about what I need to hear about first. Right and then inshallah next week, we're going to address the next portion of the science alumni. So it's going to take a few 100 bucks to get through the entire thing. And I hope that shallow Tala gives us clarity on these concepts, this wisdom that he has given us, and we are all able to live by these beautiful teachings and only increase in love and understanding and removal of ill feelings from all those

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