Naima B. Robert – Biggest Barrier To Pleasure For Muslim Couples

Break it down for me. Biggest barriers to

pleasure for Muslim couples. What's going on?

Fear,

shame,

guilt,

sometimes inherited guilt,

and trauma.

Mhmm.

This is from from

men and women.

Growing up in households where * was not

discussed,

growing up in households where the sister couldn't

say that she was on her period and

had to lie and pretend that she fasting

because, no, your brothers can't know, and any

talk about the body was forbidden.

It comes from

relationship trauma, because whether whether it is haram

or not,

Muslims have * outside of marriage.

And sometimes they do it in a way

where they expect that there's gonna be a

different outcome. But when the outcome is

this person just had * with me and

left me, it can leave you with relationship

trauma.

So now you feel guilty

for doing this act, and then you you

you you focus that guilt on yourself. You

start to shame yourself.

It comes from a lack of education

and a fear at getting at at getting

the education. You know, you have Muslims who've

been married for a number of years who

are like, Angelica, I can't, you know, read

this book that you told me to read

because what if my husband sees me reading?

I said, what if your husband sees you

reading a book about *? That's you're trying

to be

the best partner for your husband in this

life that you can be. What what is

where is the fear coming from? But you

have people who have this

deeply ingrained mistrust of their own bodies

and a fear of sexual education because they're

afraid of of of

Allah not loving them. I've had people say,

well, Allah will not love me if he

knew how much I love *. I said,

well, let me let you in on no

secret, sis. Let me let you let let

me let you in on a little secret.

Allah already knows.

You thought you were hiding it.

But the cat literally is out of the

bag. Like It's gone.

A lot already knows. Oh. But but but,

you know, peep people see a lot as

babies. Is Allah is vengeful. I've had sisters

tell me in tears

until I started talking to you, I thought

Allah hated me all these years.

I thought Allah hated me. So it really

comes it it it always goes back to

Allah. It always goes back to Allah. What

do we think about

our creator? What do we think about our

bodies that are creations of Allah?

How how do we connect to ourselves and

how do we connect to another person? How

can * be bad if it's the very

act by which the majority of humankind was

created?