Naima B. Robert – Advice for Muslim Women on Feeling Like a Failure

Do you know how many sisters I have

spoken to who are super women and don't

even know it.

These are women who juggle homes and families

and careers and studies

and extracurricular

activities

and menus and diets and sports and working

out and Quran and Arabic and family and

all these different things, juggles, balls that they've

got in the air, all at once, all

the time.

But when you sit with them

and they're honest and share with you,

they will tell you that they feel like

a failure,

That they feel like they haven't accomplished anything.

That they're not as good as so and

so.

That they haven't done as well as this

one or the other one.

That they don't have confidence.

That they don't know themselves.

That they've lost themselves.

Sound familiar?

If only you knew, my dear sister, how

amazing

you truly are.

I see it.

Anyone with 2 eyes can see

it, including you.

It's time to see yourself

with clear

eyes. Let go of the baggage.

Let go of the guilt. Let go of

the shame.

Let go of the comparison.

Silence the inner critic, silence that inner mean

girl, and see yourself for who you truly

are.

Because I guarantee you,

if you were to see yourself as you

truly are,

you would see the hero

that is within.

She's there.

She's there. She's turning

up. She's showing up every day. She's doing

what needs to be done. She's getting the

job done.

She is the source. She is the comfort.

She is the glue. She is the rock.

She is there showing up every single day.

It's just that you're not recognizing her.

And so what I'm going to invite you

to do,

soon as you finish watching this, just sit

down,

get a piece of paper,

and write down a list of 25 things

that you should justly be proud

of. And when I say anything

and everything, I mean anything and everything.

And I'm including the things that you don't

even think are a big deal. Deal. Things

like making your children pack lunch.

Things like knowing how to make your husband's

favorite dish.

Knowing how to do accounts,

being good with languages,

knowing

how to do a cartwheel,

being able to ride a bike,

memorizing Quran,

helping your neighbor,

being a source of comfort for your family.

All of these things count

because this is who you are.

Because we are not made up

by the sum of our huge accomplishments, the

ones that the world sees and recognizes.

No.

We are made

up of the decisions that we make every

single day.

The small things, the little things, the things

that you think don't matter,

but make the world of a difference

to those around you. Those who love you,

who trust you, who respect you, who need

you.

A lot of women that I spoken to,

they think that cooking a meal every day

is no big deal.

But I say this,

nourishing your family,

giving them healthy food,

food that they enjoy,

ensuring that they are fed

and nourished,

this is an act of Iberda.

All that's that's missing is the intention.

And if you have the ability to do

that, that is a blessing.

So acknowledge it. Because that's what I'm gonna

ask you to do today is

acknowledge

yourself. Go to that woman in the mirror.

Tell her how much

you admire

her, how much you love her,

and how proud you are of her.

And then go and write me that list

of 25 things, 50 things that you do

well.

Because it's time that you showed up.

It's time you saw

how much you already show up

and be the true hero of your own

life story.