Nadim Bashir – The Fortunate #07 – Applying Modesty
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The speakers discuss the importance of"the best way" in translating Arabic words into English and avoiding negative consequences. They emphasize the need for a higher understanding of one's ability to connect with others and avoid negative consequences, as it is considered a culture of fear. The speakers also emphasize the importance of protecting oneself and others, particularly women and men interacting, and caution about dressing oneself in public. They stress the need to be patient and not let one's attention go into the heart, and emphasize the importance of staying away from certain behavior and not allowing one's attention go into the heart.
AI: Summary ©
Bismillah Al Rahman Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah he Muhammad, while early he was a big marine about. So, today in sha Allah, there is a topic that I would like to talk about, which many of us we have trouble understanding. And not only that, but the word is you cannot find any translation of the English and the English language of this Arabic word. This is something that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam has mentioned that this is part of the nature of a believer. This is one of the signs of a believer. This is one of the branches of faith as a Prophet sallallahu it was something he mentioned in a hadith. And then not only that, but
he's also mentioned that this thing that Allah subhanaw taala has created, that if you and I we have it only brings hired and only brings good to us, and that is the subject of hire. Now if I were to ask you to translate hire, many people have translated in different ways. Some some people say it's modesty, some people say bashfulness many people don't even understand what is the word bashfulness mean anyway, many people say that it is the right thing to do and is staying away from the wrong things. So first of all, is that haiga is something that Allah subhanho wa Taala he creates within all of us to begin with as a fitrah is part of our natural behavior. And this is what Imam Ghazali
Muhammad Allah Allah He mentioned. In fact, the best way I can add the best example or the best definition, I will say, that I have found of HYAH is HYAH is a trait and a behavior or is a character, that it motivates you to do something good. And not only that, but it also means to have this character that if you did something wrong, and people were to find out about that you did something wrong, then you will be shameful about it, okay, this is probably the best way I can, I can really translate this and this is the best explanation that I have found And subhanAllah if you go through all the examples that we will go through right now, you will fit this definition and this
definition fits everywhere in our life. First of all is that the word HYAH means life. In general, you can ask, we know this for a fact, when you have a body that is alive, every organ in the body is functioning, every organ in the body has an objective, it has a job to do, when the entire body is functioning properly, the person is able to do everything that he wants, when the body is not functioning when the organs are not doing its job, then the person slowly and gradually internally he becomes sick and he begins to die internally. When a person has HYAH they have life in them spiritually they are connected to Allah. But number two ethically they are connected to they are
able to connect with other people in the appropriate way. But when a person does not have higher is as if they are dead inside. And you know when a person is dead inside, it does not matter what you tell them, they will nothing will penetrate them. You can talk to them and they are they are not affected at all. In fact the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he has also mentioned a hadith very beautiful Hadith that tells us that what is a person without higher he says in nama adelakun Nurse Min Kalam in Naboo waddle Hola. This is a Hadith the Prophet saw some he says that one of the admonished Sins of the previous prophets that was conveyed to the people, even in this OMA is what
either lamda stuffy, if you have no hire first, not a machine, then do whatever you want to do. When a person has no hire, they're absolutely dead inside. And this is why, you know, we're gonna go through this right now. But when a person does not have higher, you look at animals, just look at animals. This is a creation of Allah subhana wa Tada. This is a creation that does not have any higher, none whatsoever. This is why when you see animals the way they behave, they don't care who's around. They don't care where they are. When you see animals when they relieve themselves, they really themselves anywhere, when you see animals mating, they made anywhere they don't care about
who's watching and what's going on. This is because they don't have any higher Allah has not created them with this ability of higher or this understanding of higher but the human being is a is a creation of Allah, that they have this higher within them, and they have it fifth or attend they have it as a part. This is how Allah has programmed us. And how do we know this? When Allah subhanho wa Taala he tells us a story of our demonic Islam, that when he ate from the tree for them, that was shudder water, but that Lahoma so to Houma that when they ate from the tree, the very first thing that happened is
Allah took the clothes of Jana from them. And when Allah took the clothes of Jana, from them Did Allah how to teach Adam and how well what to do naturally what they did was, they took the leaves of the tree and they covered their body. This is what fifth rotten means. And there are two types of hijab one is the fifth rotten higher the Allah has created within all of us. One is the higher that we are we develop based on our society. Now Subhan Allah, I'm going to give you some examples here going forward. But if you look at the society that we live in Subhanallah This is a very immoral society that we live in. Everywhere you go around, in modesty is being preached in modesty is in
modesty is the behavior of our society that we live in. And so I'm gonna give you some examples of this going forward. First of all, is the highest level of modesty is what to have modesty when it comes to Allah subhanho wa taala. What does it mean that you are modest with Allah, it means that to do that, which Allah has ordered us to do, to stay away from the things that Allah has made prohibited, when it comes to the melodica How are we supposed to show mercy to the melodica we all know that the melodica surrounds us the only two times when the melodica they go away, is when a person goes to the restroom. And when a person is with their with their spouse, besides that the
Malayaka are around them. Now imagine sometimes we feel like we're all alone. We do things because we know that no one is watching us. But once again, if I do something that people later on, if they were to find that I would be ashamed of that means that we did something immodest. Now, let's go into some examples about because there's modesty with Allah subhanho wa taala. And then there's modesty with the Moloch in the creation of Allah subhanho wa taala. First of all, hyah immodesty in the way we dress. There is a way that Allah subhanho wa Taala has told us how to dress. You know, the other day, there was a brother that came to me. And there were just asking me about, you know,
different cultures, the way they dress and so forth. And I had to explain to them and I'll explain this to right now very briefly, there is certain there is not any certain way that a Muslim man or woman is supposed to dress. In terms of cultures, we all come from different cultures, there's all different ways of dressing. In our deen. There are certain standards, there are certain key rules that our Dean has taught that a woman has to do such and such things. A man has to dress in such a such way. Now after that how you dress is how you dress. But these are the key standards that have to be have to be fulfilled. But when we dress, do we dress in a way that is modest, or we dress in
ways that are immodest? The way the more we show off our body? The more immodest we are. Part of modesty is we cover ourselves as much as we can Subhanallah look at the look at the animals. Look at the animals once again, do we see animals wearing clothes? No, we don't see animal wearing clothes. In fact, if you see an animal wearing clothes, it's weird. It's weird. Why? Because this is how Allah has created them. But the human being is such that we should be covering ourselves as much as we can. Today. Subhanallah we're living in a culture that the more we expose ourselves, the more recommendations we get in our society. This is against the modesty of Islam. And I will go further
ahead and say this, we should also be careful of how we dress inside the house. How we dress inside the house is very important. I always tell parents, if you have sons, and you have daughters, you have sons and you have daughters. This is once again how you run things in Your own home is your choice. But part of modesty is that trying to keep yourself covered as much as you can. The boys should not be walking around in shorts inside the house. While you have women inside the house. It does not matter who it is. I remember one time we went somewhere. We went for hygiene. And in our room in our room. There was a there was a brother that was walking around in underwear. This happens
many times people are just walking around, even in the houses, they're walking around in their underwear. You know, even the culture that we live in. There are a lot of people who are proud they walk inside their house naked. Why? Because there's health benefits to it and so forth. Whatever it is, this is immodest, especially when we have children inside the house. We have to be extremely careful about this. We have to teach our children what exactly is higher, and therefore men and women when they dress inside the house, especially when you have children. We have to be very, very careful about this. A man came and asked the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam about being naked
and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, avoid exposing yourselves in front of each other, avoid exposing yourself in front of each other. In fact, in fact, I will go even on a limb and say this too, that some even women have come
Me too. And they have asked that What about if I, as a woman, if I want to go see an OBGYN specialist, can I go to a male? Now I understand there are a lot of male, you know, people in first of all, it doesn't make any sense to me. But nonetheless, there are ways male physicians who are OBGYN ins, but it is not allowed for our Muslim women to go to them exposing your older like that unless unless there's a very dire situation, a very dire situation, fine. I understand our deen has permitted us, but just going for a regular checkup and going to a male doctor and exposing yourself like that. It is not correct. And so if there are alternatives that we go to the alternatives, you
know, there might be some other there might be some other female doctors that you probably aren't comfortable with. But we have to be careful about these kinds of things. Something else that we see in our society happens Allah, Allah, the youth have come to me and asked me about this way, especially when they play sports, the shower together. It's a culture that we live in, you know, athletes, they shower in front of each other, they naked in front of each other. I had youth who have come to me and asked me the same question that can we shower from each other? And I told his youth No, you should not be it is against immodesty. I mean, it's against modesty. It is immodest to
shower in front of each other, if you need to take a shower, come back home and take your shower. But do not take your shower over there. But this is something that a lot of our Muslim youth, they want to play sports, and they get into this. And then this happens. So this is why is very, very important. How we dress exposing ourselves in front of others is very important that we understand these things. Number two HYAH in terms of reading something, or watching something, watching, a lot of times what happens is that there's something that's coming on television, telling our kids go away, don't watch this, you know that you're watching something which is completely wrong, okay.
Now, one is that if there is something going on TV, then you know that there's some kind of discussion that is going on, they might be inappropriate for children. That's something different, but you know that you're watching something that is considered as completely filth, then you should stay away from that, because that's also against modesty. Higher, how do you apply higher in, in how we talk? There are some people that when they talk, that the only thing that comes out of their mouth is, is profanity. You know, we say you know, galega Roach, you know, they're just every single word that comes out of their mouth, is profanity. This is against the modesty of Islam, how we
speak, how we talk, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when you reflect on the way he would talk, these are not words that will come out from the province of someone's mouth. A lot of times these kinds of things happen. And not only that, but when we talk when we're talking about talking, and so forth, and being verbal, I want to also discuss that when it comes to asking questions when it comes to asking questions, questions, especially related to the subject of, you know, acquiring Dini knowledge or religious knowledge. And those kinds of cases, you should not be shy. There are some cases where people were shy, for example, in the case of Oliver, viola, Don, he knew that his
father in law is Rasulullah, sallAllahu, alayhi, wa salam, and all the Sahaba whenever they had questions about religion, they will come to who to Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, but a colleague of your town he mentioned, he says,
Come to Raja and Muda. And there is a certain discharge that a man has. And when this discharge takes place, it does not it only requires a person to make Lulu. Now when he comes to the power Summit, he asks him this question, he's going to be uncomfortable. So what did he do? He sent another man to go as was was awesome. The same question why? Because once again that modesty kicks in and the modesty gets applied. At the same time, there was a Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that there was a a woman who came in she asked the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam, the name of this woman was almost so lame or the Allah Tala on her, and she said that she
asked the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam, about a woman seeing a certain dream and Does she ever take a whistle or not? And the Prophet SAW Allahu Allah, he was some he was very upfront about it. They Yes, she has to take a whistle. And at that time, all of a sudden, I was sitting over there, and she had covered her face out of higher She covered her face. And then later on, she asked us allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the Prophet saw some told her, but nonetheless, you see, what does higher mean here how, you know having this understanding and having a deeper level of protecting yourself is higher. It's one of the signs of higher when it comes to treating each other
when it comes to interacting with each other, especially when it comes to men and women interacting with each other first
So what is the Sahaba the prophets of salaam he would interact with the women to during his time, there were women in the battlefields nursing and taking care of the wounded Sahaba, or the Ultra and home. So the question is that how are men and women? How do you apply higher when they have to be together or when they have to communicate with each other? There are so many different rules of Elder Law, the very first thing is, no man and woman should be alone in one room. Why? Because the next person or the third person is shaytaan. The next thing is if I need to communicate a lot of our youth, they have difficulty understanding this when you need to, you don't like Subhanallah, there
was a young brother who came to me he said that I had been put in a group study circle, were 10 of us. I'm the only man and there are nine women with me. Now, what do I do now, of course, that in that class, there's only three men, there's 27 women, okay, so if you do the math, there is no way you're going to be you're going to be only with the men. So I had to explain to him that what are the etiquettes of LT loud first of all you talk if you need to talk to the opposite gender is regarding the business in itself. Number two, you meet in public number three, talk in front of each other while there are other people around you. Number four, if you need to meet you meet at a public
space. Number five, if you need to meet you meet a daytime. So there are certain these kinds of certain rules that when you have to do is Tila with the other and the opposite gender, then there are some certain rules that we have to apply in place. Go back to the story of Musa alayhis salaam Musa alayhis salam comes into the city. We all know the story. He helped us two women, those two women they went home they told their father about the story. The Quran says Fauja to the Houma Tam, she is still here that when she came to Musashi Assam she never came to Musala asana and began flirting with him and talking to him and so forth. She came the Quran says she came in the state of
Hyah. She applied higher the My Father is asking for your presence, he wants you to come over to our home. So the Quran says that she came with immense amount of HIA not only that, look at the higher of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, a woman came and asked the Prophet SAW Sanlam that after my menstrual cycles, what am I supposed to do and how should I clean myself? The problem is some verbally told her, this is the way you should clean yourself. This woman she never understood that she wanted more of an elaboration. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam at that time, he realized that going more into detail is going to make him uncomfortable. What did he do? He covered his face,
he covered his face, there was another Sahabi he covered his face. And then I usually allow that on her. She came she took that woman on the side and then explained to her that how do you clean yourself and how do you take care of your needs. This is once again the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam applying higher in his life, because he knows that going into these kinds of subject matters can make the situation uncomfortable, or there are some certain details that I will not be comfortable in explaining. So let my wife Aisha, and she came and she took the woman aside and she was able to explain to her, how about higher when we go to places going to places once again, that
if you and I we know that if other people found out we will be a shame about it about it. Therefore we should not go to those kinds of places. We learned from the story of Musa alayhis salam
also about the fact that when he wanted to go and take a shower, we there's a story a long story
of the Hadith the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam they read about or whatever the Allah I know that he talks about Musa alayhis salam that Musa lays on when he wanted to take a shower he went to a separate place. Now that people bunnies saw yield there were saying that the reason why Musa takes a shower by himself is because he has some issues. And so and so and there are some skin diseases that he has. And therefore Allah subhanho wa Taala he was able to clear that but Musa lays on putting his clothes on the rock in the rock began to run and he when the rock came in from the people, the reason why this happened someone can say that is in this against modesty that ALLAH
SubhanA wa Tada made Musa some expose it for another people. Initially if you go back to the action of Musa Assam, he went separately some other place to take a shower. In this case Allah subhanho wa Taala wanted to clear the name of Musa alayhis salam. Therefore this is why this situation took place. So this is why and not only that was Subhanallah even in the case of Aisha Viola and Ana, we all know if you go to Medina, the house where Aisha was, this was the same place where the person was buried. And not only that, but even her father. We know that her father is buried over there. And then amaro Thanos
braid over there. So it mentions is mentioned that when after the death of the Prophet SAW Salem, and after the death of her father, whenever she would have come inside her home, she was me she was comfortable. So she would take, she would expose herself and so forth. But when Alma Vaughn who died and Alma was buried in that same place, after that never did I shall ever go back to that home and expose herself, because she said that even though Omar is is not even alive anymore, and he's buried and he's under the ground, still because of my higher, I'm not going to expose myself even though Omar is buried in that same place. This is called hire. This is how the Sahaba they applied hire in
terms of how they conducted themselves and so forth. Now, there are two things that are left. Number one is how do you develop that hire and how do you maintain that hire a few things number one, we always go back to the Quran and the Sunnah, following the Quran, found the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam number three, protecting the gaze. You know, a lot of times we don't understand what is the hikma behind protecting the gaze. See, when you see something, your mind begins to work. When you see something, you know, you can hear something, and your mind won't begin to work as much as if you see something. You don't keep your gift. You don't protect your gaze, and
you look at something that you're not allowed to look at. Automatically, your mind begins to work, you began to think about it and so forth. This is why Allah subhanho wa Taala has told us about herbal medicine, because what our mind begins to think. And we start thinking and thinking and thinking and it comes into the heart, and then we want to act upon it. The very first thing that brought that idea into our mind is the fact that we saw something, this is why you have build muscle, protect your gaze. If you're not going to look at something, you're not going to even think about something if you're not going to even think about something, it's not going to come into your
heart if it's not going to come into your heart. You're never going to act upon it. That's why the huddle bizarre, the next one is that if there is something absolutely difficult,
there is a Masia, there is a sin that you want to commit to stay away from that no matter how much your desire. This is why one of the things one of the three knifes is called one three knifes is knifes. Amara, what is the Amara, there is enough Samara. There's enough Salawa and enough Sumatra in Nuff said, Amara, is that knifes that pushes you to go do something, you want to do something right? That NAFSA Amara pushes you to go do something right? When you want to do something wrong that knifes Amara keeps on pushing you to go and do something wrong. This is why it's very important that when you and I when we want to commit a sin, and we want to stay away from it, we have to be
absolutely patient with fighting our desire to that time. And the last thing is sitting in the company of those people who have higher sitting in the company, those people who have higher when you sit around these kinds of people, then eventually you'll develop higher. Now what are some of the things that can destroy our higher, the very first thing is to be boastful about the sins that we commit Subhanallah we live in a time where people feel that it is cool, I will fit into a group if I expose my sins, never expose your sins. These are one of the people who are the most despised by Allah subhanaw taala next thing is to be dress to be dressed in a way that where our bodies are
not revealed. This is something that we all know what's going on the way we dress, the way men are dressing the way women are dressing, and so forth. We have to keep ourselves less expose as much as we can, even though nowadays, I mean, subhanAllah we have people who are, excuse me, who are dressed, but they're dressing so much in such a way that you can see their body figure and so forth. Or sometimes their clothes are so see through this is against modesty, then not only that, to talk to a woman or talk to an opposite gender. And not only that, but because once again, shutdown can always come to come in our minds and so forth, and in and bring ideas in our mind. That's why
talking to an opposite gender or talking to someone of the opposite gender, and
not applying the rules of the law. This can also destroy modesty number, the next one, talking to someone talking to someone
or talking to another person, it can be a man or woman about the secrets about you and your spouse.
These are things that are not supposed to be shared with other people. What goes on between you and your family and you and your spouse stays between you and your spouse, there is no need to to expose that there's no need to share that with other people and so forth.
Because even today Subhanallah you know, I've mentioned this before, when men and women get married one or two days later when their friends come along and they said tell them they they moody Subhanallah in some cultures, this is a practice people, the women of the family, they come to the new bride and say to her, tell us what happened. Subhanallah I mean, this is something between the husband and wife, you keep it between the husband and the wife, there is no need to share what goes on. There Prophet SAW Allah hottie he was sending him one never share with his other wives. What would happen in his other homes? Never. This is part of modesty. And lastly, to keep yourself
covered as much as you can. This is also something or not covering yourself properly, can lead someone to immodesty. So I ask Allah subhanho wa Taala once again, that He gives us the ability to apply higher in our life. Once again higher can apply to clothing higher can apply to your behavior hierarchy can apply to the way you speak and you say things and then not only that there's higher with Allah, there's higher with the monologue of Allah subhanho wa Taala and once again, if you and I we don't have higher we are absolutely dead inside and eventually we become like animals because the Prophet saw some says either learn to study first nah man shit when you don't have higher you do
whatever you want to do, we ask Allah subhana wa Taala that he gives us higher so that we can gain hair from Allah subhanho wa Taala May Allah subhanho wa Taala protect us from those things that can destroy our higher or that can destroy the higher or upcoming generations. And finally ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to grant our children higher Melosa behind grant or families higher mirabile Alameen Zakum Allah Subhana Allah Who McGraham dig
into that stuff, we're going to be the exact Malachite said I'm already gonna kill you but I'll catch you later.