Mustafa Khattab – Talaq Made Easy
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
I bear witness that there is none worthy
of our worship except Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala,
and I bear witness that Muhammad salallahu alaihi
wa sallam is the seal of the prophets
and the final messenger to all humanity.
Whoever Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala guides, there is
none to
misguide. And whoever Allah
leaves astray, there is none to guide arayat.
Ramadan is only a few weeks ago. That's
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala in Ubelir in Ramadan.
We ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala to give
us the life and the strength to fast
in this Ramadan
and to get closer to Allah
So a lot of people are excited because
this is a special time. You get closer
to Allah
your sins are forgiven, you are raised in
rank, and so on and so forth.
But some people in the few weeks before
Ramadan, they are nervous
and they have issues for a totally different
reason.
And a lot of people, they have what
I like to call the PRTS.
This is what I what they call it
scientifically.
So
PRTS
stands for pre Ramadan talaq syndrome.
Because some people think
that it is haram to give talaq in
the month of Ramadan, so what they do,
they want to get this done with before
over with before the month of Ramadan. It's
a misconception that some people have.
So what they do, the few weeks before
the month of Ramadan, people go nuts. I
want to finish this before Ramadan.
You know, so they back me and they
back other imams.
So, MashaAllah, the phone calls,
non stop, every day, emails,
Facebook,
WhatsApp.
So to the point, of, like, I'm I'm
afraid when I go home, if I open
the fridge, someone is gonna pop out Taq.
So I'm I'm going nuts at this time
of the year. So as I said, people
do it because they think it is halam
to,
give tawaf in the month of Ramadan.
And, of course, we know that Shaitan
will be on vacation in Ramadan. Shaitan is
chained.
Shaitan
so Shaitan wants to close the case, the
file, just before Ramadan.
So Shaytan will relax in the month of
Ramadan.
So this is why people are going in
Naz.
So today, because there are so many misconceptions
about Talak,
so I decided to dedicate
the 20 minutes of the life of this
Khubba to give you the basics
of this concept in Islam because there are
so many misconceptions.
So the title of the Khubba, talaq made
easy. Not that I'm I'm asking you to
go and make talaq, but just to share
the basics,
with you, Insha Allahu Ta'ala.
So we need to understand
that marriage is
Allah called it,
It's a tremendous
commitment.
And Allah
wants the family to be together, and Allah
doesn't want people to go through duaq. It
is painful.
The family will collapse and the kids will
be the victim. So Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
wants to keep the family together. And Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala tells us in the Quran.
So Allah
is telling us, if you want the marriage
to succeed,
there has to be mawaddah and rahma in
the relationship.
There has to be love, respect,
mercy,
compassion,
hikmah,
wisdom, and sabr.
This is what it takes to be successful
in the marriage.
And I tell people over and over again,
if you want the marriage to succeed, as
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, you have to
have Muadhan Rahmah. And this basically means
for the husband
to treat his wife the same way he
likes his own daughter and his own sister
to be treated by her husband, with respect
and dignity.
And I tell the wife, treat your husband
the same way you like your own son
or your own brother, to be treated by
his wife with respect and dignity.
So these are the requirements.
And Allah
makes it difficult for talaq to happen because,
you know, the kids and the family and
this tremendous,
commitment.
Right? So for example,
they have this saying,
So the most disliked thing, which is halal
to Allah, is talaf. And most of the
scholars say this is not hadith. It's a
statement from 1 of the alama' or one
of the sahaba, but the meaning is acceptable.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala does not want talab
to happen. And this is why in sharia
we have different challenges when we have different
requirements
for talab to happen.
And say for example, if someone gives his
wife talab three times in one
setting, the chosen opinion in sharia is one
count of talaq happens. Because there is a
hadith, someone came to the prophet
and told him, Ishaab, bear witness that I
divorced my wife 3 times.
And the prophet
was not happy, and he said, if you
want to divorce your wife, give your taq
according to sunnah. Why count? You don't have
to do 3, just 1. 1 is enough.
And if someone, yeah, and he gives his
wife taq, in sharia, it is not over
with. There's iddah, 3 months, there are different
conditions, but 3 months, let's say. If you
give back to each other during the 3
months, Alhamdulillah.
But if the iddah expires, and they didn't
give back to each other, and they wanted
to give back after Ida, this is by
Nuna Surah, they get back to each other,
she can marry anyone
including her ex with a new and a
new because they call it, Bailun Surah.
And if they marry again with a new
If the same thing happens, they have quidah,
if it expires, they marry again, they have
a third chance.
If this happens,
there's no coming back, she needs to marry
someone else, Bainun al Kubra. She needs to
marry someone else before she marries him again
with a new mark and and a new
act. Atalat al Marutan in Surat Qafar. So
this is one of the, one of the
rules in in this case. Some people I've
seen some people,
they don't talk to each other like husband
and wife for 2 or 3 years. She
lives with his mom work with her mom,
he lives with his mom, and they think
this is talaq, and now they think about
marrying someone else.
And I tell them that the first marriage
is not over yet because talaq has to
be done in a certain way. You have
to say the word. But if you just
say, well, I don't want to live with
you, and they go and they live in
different places, this is not talaq. It's called
separation,
but not talaq.
And of course, if someone gives his his
wife,
Talaq during the monthly cycle, their chosen opinion
it doesn't count. And I'll tell you why
in a minute.
We know that, like,
typically,
a sister, for example, if she has her
monthly cycle
and let's say the monthly cycle is over
on the first of the month,
she has this period of purity for 21,
25 days more or less before the next
one. So if someone
has a relationship with his wife during this
21, 25 days, then he gives her talat
before the next period.
It doesn't count.
This is like they call it talatul bidri,
and it doesn't count according to the majority
of the scholars.
Let him know the
prophet says,
If someone does something that is not according
to the sunnah, then it is invalid.
So say for example, if someone
says like, why 3 rakafur malrib? I wanna
do more. I'm gonna pray 4 rakafur malrib
or 5.
His salah is not accepted. It has to
be done according to the sunnah of the
Prophet
So as I said, yes, I know there
is difference of opinion,
but the chosen opinion is that in the
case of, the monthly cycle, the the the
wart happens, or after childbirth, during the bleeding,
or within this period of 21, 25 days,
more or less, the period of purity,
if the worst happens, it doesn't take effect.
It is invalid.
Why? Because we understand for someone to make
a decision, the person has to be,
physically, emotionally, psychologically
stable.
But during this time,
typically,
the the wife is not emotionally stable, and
sometimes the husband would lose interest in his
wife.
Or after they have the relationship, the intimate
relationship, if he gives her talaq,
he fulfilled his desire, so khalas he lost
interest.
So in this case, the chosen opinion is
a talaq, doesn't happen.
And and SubhanAllah like, we have kids,
you take them to the store, they go
to Toys R Us or whatever, and they
see a toy, let's say for example Barbie
or something else, and they're going nuts. They
want the toy. They fall on the floor.
They are crying. They are making the scene.
They make you feel like you're kidnapping them,
and and they make you feel like they
are the most miserable kid if you don't
buy them the toy, and and you are
the worst dad if you don't buy to
them.
And if you buy to them, they will
be dancing in the street. So eventually,
you would just buy it for them.
And and, mashaAllah, you feel like that all
the problems are solved, no problem, they would
be happy,
3 days later they break the neck of
Barbee, and they break the leg, and they
throw everything in the garbage because they lost
interest.
Human beings are like this. So Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala does not want you to make
a decision when you lost desire or lost
interest. You have to be mentally,
physically, psychologically stable to make this tremendous
decision. Talak is not easy.
Then we have the issue of talaq and
mashrut. A lot of people are confused. Or
if someone says to his wife, you go
to Niagara Falls
or you go to Buffalo, I will give
you a talaq.
So basically, the ulama make the distinction between
two things. If if you say I'll give
you talaq if you go, if your niyyah
was a threat, you're just threatening,
in this case, it is kafaratuliyamin,
it is not talaq.
So if you said, if you go there,
I'll give you talaq.
She went dalabit pikalamikaratul
Hayat, and she went. In this case,
yamin kafarat yamin, because your niyyah was not
talaq. And again, there's difference of opinion, but
I'm giving you the chosen one.
And in this case, because she broke your
oath,
you will feed 10 poor people, or if
you can't, you just pass the 3 days.
If if your niya was talaq, then this
is one count of talaq.
It is it is very simple, very basic.
The other example is talaql al Khabbarib. So
one is very angry and they give talaq
to their wife. So again, in extreme anger,
the prophet says, If
someone is very mad and they give their
wife talaq in this case, then the talaq
doesn't count, but talaq talaq is basically extreme
anger. Because typically, anyone who gives talaq to
their wife, they are mad, they are sad,
they are not happy,
but it has to be extreme anger.
Like, your head is about to explode,
steam is coming out of your ears, you
don't know what you are saying, you are
going crazy,
you know, you don't know what you are
saying. This is talatul iqlat, and it doesn't
count in this case.
But just basic anger,
you know, if if someone gives his wife
talat when he's a little bit angry, talas
iris talak. But we are talking about extreme
anger.
So we ask the husband, how angry were
you? He would say Well, I was extremely
angry, I was about to kill someone or
jump out of the window or I would
just I was a little bit irritated and
I gave her talk. Little irritation, talk counts.
The extreme anger, then in this case the
talaq doesn't count. So these are some of
the basic,
rulings of Talak.
So now,
a couple of other things inshallah.
Let's say for example,
the wife doesn't live with the husband and
she filed for divorce.
Right?
Islamically in sharia, and legally I cannot, as
an imam, I cannot force someone to stay
with another person against their will.
I don't have the authority.
Like if the wife files for divorce and
the husband comes to me, I don't approve
of this marriage,
I have no say. I have no authority
as an imam. If they took it to
the judge, to the court, I have no
say as an imam.
Because this is not a Muslim country and
the judge is the highest authority.
If the husband issues talaq,
as an imam, I have to talk to
the husband
to confirm
the judge's decision. I talk to the husband,
I say, your wife doesn't want to live
with you.
I cannot force you. The judge cannot force
you to live with her.
And the same thing, like, one time, a
sister, like, came, his her husband was giving
her talaq,
and the sister said, I don't want talaq.
I want to stay with him. And I
said, I don't have the authority to force
your husband to stay with you. I don't
have the authority.
It has to be done consensually between both
of them. Right? So now,
if the sister files for divorce, Talat,
and she took him to the court, and
the judge says, you know, the husband has
to give her 50% of everything.
50% of the house, 50% of the car,
50% of his Facebook account,
50% of your kidney, and so on and
so forth. Like the rest of this video
a couple of years ago, this guy in
the US, he took the law very literally.
He gave his wife basically 50% of everything.
So he cut everything in half. The cut
in half with the saw,
the bed, the couch, everything will lie. He
cut everything in half. And the money, he
would cut it in half. No. This is
your 50%. This is my 50%. Right?
So now, Islamically,
you know what your rights are in Islam?
The maha and the nafakha,
so forth. And this is your haqq. And
the prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam says if
a judge gives you more than your right,
you are eating fire in your belly. You
shouldn't take what is more than your haqq.
Right?
However, there are exceptions.
Say for example, a brother and a sister,
they got married 35, 40 years ago. There
are cases.
Her mom was, like, 50, $70.
30, you know, 35 years ago, 40 years
ago, $50, $100
was something.
But now after 40 years, the $100,
you can barely
feed 2 people biryani with $50, $70. Right?
So the money lost its value.
And in this case, we talked to the
husband, you have to pay a little bit
more because the $50 $70 is nothing, ma'am.
So you have to compensate your wife. Give
her a little bit more.
You have to honor your wife and and
your relationship with her.
Another example
for the 50 50 percent, this is actually
a ruling in sharia that the wife will
get 50%
in one case.
If she started a business with her husband
and she was not getting paid for all
her work for 15, 20, 30 years
and he didn't give her any money, and
in this case, she will deserve something from
the money. It could be up to 50%.
Because now she is treated as a partner
with her husband in the business.
Unless she was getting, for example, a salary
or some payment monthly or something, then this
is a totally, different case.
To make it easy for everyone
and in order to settle any, conflict between,
court of law and Sharia and so on
and so forth, regarding the 50% of everything,
a lot of celebrities and famous people and
politicians and so on and so forth, when
they get married,
what they do, they do what they call
legally as a pre natural agreement. So this
this basically means, you'll go to the lawyer
with your wife before the marriage and you
will make an agreement
that in case of tawah, your wife is
only entitled to man,
and you will sign the agreement.
And this agreement is binding in the US
and Canada. If you have this agreement
and again, a lot of billionaires and billionaires,
when they get married, they sign this agreement.
Like, this is my money. Why would I
pay 50%?
So a lot of people have this mentality.
You know, people like Donald Trump
and Tom Cruise and all these people, when
they get married, they sign a pre national
agreement. In case of tilap, you will give
the amount and that's it, not the 50%.
So this is something to consider and in
this agreement, the husband and the wife, they
can put all the conditions they want. Not
only the husband. The wife can also have
con conditions that are, acceptable Islamically and in
this case it is binding
and this will put everyone's heart at ease.
So, inshallah, in the last couple of minutes
of the life of this Khubba,
we'll talk a little bit about Islam and
Mi'raj.
So, basically,
yeah. We're not for sure when it happened
in Rajab or somewhere else,
but the point was that Allah
comforted the Prophet
He lost his wife Khadija
He lost his uncle Abu Talib, and so
on and so forth. So Allah
wanted to comfort the Prophet
and he took him for this journey. So
I shared one hadith regarding al Isra wal
Mi'raj.
Isaiid Muslim, Abdullah ibn Masrud said
that when Allah
took the prophet
for this journey,
this memorable journey, He gave him 3 gifts.
Because when you receive a powerful gift in
your house, you give them something. Like, you
give them something sweet, you give them something
precious, you give them a gift. And this
is what Allah
did.
The prophet
received 3 gifts in that night.
So the first gift,
the last 2 ayat of Surah Baqarah, the
prophet
received them directly from Allah
without Jibril
in the middle.
And
the next
They say in this hadith Islamic Muslim that
the prophet received
it directly from Allah
not through Jibreel alayhi sallam.
And number 2, namaz, the gift of salah.
So typically
in zakah, hajj, and fasting,
Allah would send Jibreel
with the order to pray, sorry, to, give
Zakah and to fast and so on and
so forth. But Namal Salah, Allah
gave the order to Muhammad
directly.
And he offered him a gift, if you
do some if someone does something good, they
will get 10 rewards.
If they do something bad, one stay holy.
This is part of the gift, the package.
If you pray
5 namaz,
you'll get the reward of 50 because we
don't initially plus 50, so we get the
reward of 50. And finally,
the last gift that the Prophet
SAW received that night,
al marfirahli
alliblib dhrub, lal id dhrub. If someone does
something wrong, committed a sin, so the gate
of mercy is not closed. So the
Allah promised Muhammad
if someone does something wrong,
no matter how big their sin is, and
they make their tawba and they give the
rights back to, the israful owners, and in
this case, Allah
would be willing to forgive them. So we
ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala to give us
the best in this life and the best
in the life to come. We ask Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala you will hear Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala and help us to fast and
do qiyam and salah properly. We ask Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala forgive our sins and accept
our good deeds. And we ask Allah
to make it easy for our brothers and
sisters in Suriyah,
to Allah, to Palestine, to Allah, to Palestine,