Mustafa Khattab – Good Tom Bad Jerry

Mustafa Khattab
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the benefits of maximizing free time for children, including learning from the environment and improving understanding before asking questions. They stress the importance of learning in the formative years of one's life and explain the concept of "has been made out of" in Islam. They also discuss the prevalence of violent children in the US and the need to help children in their mental health, including balancing mental health with behavior.
AI: Transcript ©
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I bear witness that there is none worthy

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of our worship except Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.

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And I bear witness that

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Muhammad is the seal of the prophets and

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the final messenger to all of humanity.

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Whoever

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Allah guides, there is none to misguide, and

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whoever Allah

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leaves astray,

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there is none to guide

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alight.

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Today's huqa, inshallah, will focus on,

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the free time for our kids. We spoke

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before about raising our kids in Canada,

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and the challenges they face,

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about 2 months ago we spoke about this,

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but today inshallah we'll talk about how can

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we maximize

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the benefits of our kids,

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in their free time. I know tomorrow the

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March break is gonna start, and they would

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be at home for 10 days. 10 days.

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What are they gonna do with this time?

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And after 2 months, they would have the

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summer vacation

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from June till August. That that's 3 months,

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or even more. They will be sitting at

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home. The easiest thing to do is just

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give them a phone, or give them a

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laptop, and tell them, okay, enjoy life,

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so you and the rest of the family

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can go out, or go shopping, enjoy your

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life. So we're basically trying to kill the

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time, and while we're doing this, we don't

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use it in a very,

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in a very good way, so we end

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up using this time and, and wasting the

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life. Learning nothing. Useful or beneficial.

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So this is the formative years of their

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life. Whatever they learn now, this is what

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they will take with them, to the rest

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of their lives inshaAllah.

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Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala,

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says in Surah Anahm,

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Allah

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brought you forth

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out of the wombs of your mothers while

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you know nothing.

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Then Allah

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gives you the ability to hear

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and see, and

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comprehend.

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What does that mean? You come out, no

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knowledge whatsoever,

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then He gave you the tools to learn.

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What are the tools? The eyes, because we

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are visual, we look around and we learn.

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And he gave us the ears, we listen

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to Khutba, to the teachers, to our parents,

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and we learn from the society around us.

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And Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala gave us Afida,

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the intellect.

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So we can

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understand

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and reflect

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and perceive knowledge.

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And this is why during these formative years

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in the life of your kids I hope

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we can turn off the lights at least

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in the front, please.

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So during this time your kids ask a

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lot of questions.

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From the age of 3 till the age

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of 6 and 7 they ask many questions.

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Some of them are, you know,

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are funny, but some are really logical questions.

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For example,

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they will say okay,

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who created this phone? You say some guy

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in China.

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They say Masha Allah.

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Who created this guy from China?

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You say Allah.

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Then they say, who created Allah?

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Assar Haag wakaf ifrasal alal. Some people do

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this, right? Get out of here and they

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throw a shoom at you and you know,

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sometimes.

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But some people,

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they do the right thing, they try to

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explain to them, in a logical way, that

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Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is not like us,

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we're not able to see Him at least

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in this world, and Agha and Jannah InshaAllah

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will see Him, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is

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the creator of everything,

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but He was created by no one. He

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is beyond our imagination

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and our comprehension.

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So this is one way,

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this is one question they commonly ask, where

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is Allah? What does Allah look like? Who

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created him? Like, they have these questions,

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and they deserve to know because this is

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the formative years of their life, and they

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want to learn.

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Also other questions are, you know, sexual in

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nature. They will say,

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okay, where did I come from?

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Of course,

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same thing. Some are very,

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like,

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un or illogical in their approach.

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They will either tell the kid, shut up,

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Alil Adha, don't ask these questions in my

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house, you're not my kid anymore.

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And some try to explain to them.

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With with this sense of shame that we

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should have, but they deserve to learn. We

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learned these things after Azhar growing up, we

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learned about maturity, we learned about Tahala,

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and so there's an answer for every question

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in Islam, but it depends on the approach,

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how to put the answer.

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Some will dumb down the kids and they

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don't explain to them. They say, oh, they'll

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just little kids, they don't understand anything. Just

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tell them anything to keep them quiet.

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But these kids know.

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They are logical, they understand, they ask logical

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questions, and they deserve to learn.

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So one kid, for example, asked his mom,

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where do we come from? And she said,

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honey, she tried to dumb him down and,

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you know, to give him an evasive answer.

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Not knowing that the kids are intellectuals

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in their own world, little world.

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So he said, where did we come from?

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And she said, honey,

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what happened,

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at night I had some sugar, I got

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some sugar from the kitchen, we had a

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carpet in the living room, so I lifted

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the carpet, I put the sugar, and in

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the morning I lifted the carpet and there

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you were, I found you then. So you

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were made out of sugar.

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Okay. So that night before the kid went

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to bed, he tried to do the same

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experiment. He went to the kitchen, he got

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some sugar, he put it under the carpet,

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and in the morning before his mother woke

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up, he woke up and he went there

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and he didn't find kids, he found, sure

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enough, roaches.

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They were all over the place, under the

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carpet in the living room. So So he

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went to his mom in, in her bedroom

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and he was like terrified and he said,

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Ma, look what I found. I put the

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sugar just like you did and I Look

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what I found, I found roaches.

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So his mother was worried, she said, I

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didn't know we had roaches in the house,

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why? Did you kill them? He said no.

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And she said okay why didn't you kill

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the roaches? He said how can I kill

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my own kids?

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These are my kids.

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These kids are logical man, so they know.

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So don't try to fool them, try to

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explain to them in a logical way

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inshallah and and and they will understand.

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So every question they ask is a step

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towards learning.

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So try to explain to them inshallah in

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a very logical way and using analogy and

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different things, like the plants, this is how

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Allah created us. And Allah says that in

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Surah Anu Wa Allahu ambatakum minaqartina baata. We

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are like plants,

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there is the seed, there is the fertile

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land, and we come out of the land

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like a plant. Using analogy is an effective

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way.

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Also,

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during their free time, because they want to

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learn, and sometimes,

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this is the problem with many of us,

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we don't have time to explain to them

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and sit with them, The easiest way is

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to give them a DVD or a video

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game, go and watch this, and leave me

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alone, because they don't have time, you know.

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So they go and watch,

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and

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during my years of learning English, I used

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to watch a lot of movies just to

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learn English, and I came across some terrible

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things in the movies. I love cartoon movies

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and stuff, and there are some horrible things.

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These are three observations from some of the

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movies I have seen in the past, long

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time ago.

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So, we start with Akida issues.

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Tinkerbell for example. These are some of the

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very popular cartoon movies out there, and there

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are also, there are video games. And we

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think, while protecting our kids when we keep

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them at home, and they watch things not

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knowing that some of them are are terrible

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in nature.

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In terms of theology,

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in terms of violence, in terms of sympathy

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with criminals and wicked and evil people.

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So we'll share some examples with you. So

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Tinker Bell, I saw one of those,

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you know, they they have a series like

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several movies under the same title, Tinker Bell

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and something.

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So in one of the movies, in the

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like 3 4 minutes

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into the movie,

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I saw some of those fairies,

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so what they were saying to each other

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basically, let's go

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and bring about spring. So there was winter,

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ice and the snow and stuff, they said

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okay, let's,

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bring about

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winter.

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So they started to sparkle things, magic things,

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and the spring came, and the flowers were

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blooming,

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and and the fruits and everything, and they

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brought about sun and heat, and, someone was

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praying for a kid, so they send a

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stork with a baby, you know, in the

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back. So, if these fairies, in the movie,

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they bring about

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wintertime,

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and they make the trees

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bloom,

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and they give kids to people.

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What is Allah doing? Like, if they're doing

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everything,

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you know,

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They do everything, what is left for the

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creator of the heavens and the earth? Right?

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So we need to explain to the kids

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that this is not true, this is just

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like, they stretch their artistic license and they

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do things that are not appropriate. Allah is

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the creator of everything. He creates kids, he

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creates flowers, everything.

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There was also another movie by the name

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Hercules, and it's a very popular cartoon movie

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for kids, and in that movie there was

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the God of evil, and the God of

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good, and the God of life, and the

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God of death, in in in the movie.

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So all these Gods, and the kids are

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watching me, ah there are so many Gods,

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and they are in control, and everything.

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Again, Allah is the only God. The Quran

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talks about this, there are no other gods,

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there's only one God. But because they watched

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this at a young age, it's ingrained in

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their brains now that, yeah there are so

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many forces in the world, they are in

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control.

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So this is something we need to explain

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to them.

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The other problem is violence.

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I remember one time, a few years ago,

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a sister came to the masjid with her

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son and she said my son is very

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violent, like he is out of control. He's

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always jumping and kicking his brothers and biting

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his sisters, and he's he's out of control.

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And my first question was, does he watch

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violent cartoon movies? And she said, yes. The

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whole day he's watching Looney Tunes,

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the what is his name? The, you know,

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the coyote,

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and the what is the speedy rider? And

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they are beating each other, bombing each other

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all the time, explosions all the time, and

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Tom and Jerry explosions biting with an axe

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and killing,

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and and people are laughing. And this is

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also ingrained in their personality, and the store

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the, studies show that the kids who are,

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watch violent cartoons and video games are 80%,

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more likely to be violent. Because they see

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these things all the time,

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and they think in real life, I can

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do the same thing because,

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Jerry

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is giving Tom a hard time. He's always

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hitting him with a stick or an axe,

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and he gets away with it all the

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time. He wins all the time.

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Same thing, if you play video games,

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the more people you kill, the more people

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you shoot in the game, the more points

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you get. So I was talking to my

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kids this morning,

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before they go to school, I talked to

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them a little bit, and I told them

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I've never seen a video game where if

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you help a homeless person in the street,

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you get some points. If you find a

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blind person in the street, you help them

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cross the road, you get points. There there's

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no such game. Why?

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If you play in a mouse on time,

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you get points.

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Why is it all about shooting people and

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killing them and getting points?

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And and this is why in any place,

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especially in the US, the kids will go

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to the school with guns,

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and they shoot 15,

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of their college, or they shoot their teachers

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because this is they do every day

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and you know it is fun. They think

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it is fun,

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right? It is not fun. Violence is not

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fun. But again, this is something that our

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kids are exposed to every single day, and

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this is something that we need to consider

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inshaAllah.

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Also,

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this is something that I have seen in

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many,

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movies, especially for kids. They get you up

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to a point where you sympathize with evil

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people very easily.

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Like,

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Rapunzel,

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Flynn Rider, this character this is a very

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popular cartoon movie, and this guy basically,

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beyond the good looks, this guy's a thief.

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He's a thief,

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a wicked person in the movie, but they

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get people, especially the kids, who love this

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character, and whenever he got in trouble, the

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officers are about to capture him because, You

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Allah, I hope he would escape.

00:15:10 --> 00:15:12

You Allah, I hope he is able to

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steal the treasure from the palace.

00:15:14 --> 00:15:15

I hope he will be able to steal

00:15:15 --> 00:15:18

the horse or the bag from the 2

00:15:18 --> 00:15:21

other evil guys. So they get you subconsciously

00:15:21 --> 00:15:23

to side with evil and wicked people.

00:15:24 --> 00:15:26

And they show in cartoon movies like Donald

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Duck and Tom and Jerry, and some other

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new movies,

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that the evil person always wins at the

00:15:32 --> 00:15:33

end.

00:15:33 --> 00:15:36

The evil and violent and wicked person always

00:15:36 --> 00:15:37

wins in the end.

00:15:38 --> 00:15:40

So what kind of world do we expect?

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Like, when you ask kids in,

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like,

00:15:44 --> 00:15:44

kindergarten

00:15:45 --> 00:15:47

and grade 1 or 2,

00:15:47 --> 00:15:48

every single one of them, what would you

00:15:48 --> 00:15:50

like to be when you grow older?

00:15:51 --> 00:15:53

They say, well, a doctor, a teacher, an

00:15:53 --> 00:15:57

engineer, all these beautiful jobs. And SubhanAllah, we

00:15:57 --> 00:15:58

wonder how come

00:15:59 --> 00:15:59

that

00:15:59 --> 00:16:02

in many communities, not Muslim community, but in

00:16:02 --> 00:16:04

general, there are so many thieves,

00:16:04 --> 00:16:06

there are so many crooks.

00:16:06 --> 00:16:09

Right? So if everyone started off at the

00:16:09 --> 00:16:11

same point with all these high expectations and

00:16:11 --> 00:16:13

wishful thinking that I'm gonna be a good

00:16:13 --> 00:16:15

person, how come that so many people drop

00:16:15 --> 00:16:18

out of school, they become violent, they join

00:16:18 --> 00:16:19

gangs and drug dealers,

00:16:20 --> 00:16:21

and why?

00:16:21 --> 00:16:22

I don't know, maybe

00:16:23 --> 00:16:24

this has something to do with it. Like,

00:16:24 --> 00:16:26

in their brains,

00:16:26 --> 00:16:28

it is good to be an evil person

00:16:28 --> 00:16:30

and wicked person if you smile and, you

00:16:30 --> 00:16:33

know, cheat people. This is not nice.

00:16:33 --> 00:16:35

Come on. This is real world here.

00:16:35 --> 00:16:37

So, this is what we are talking about.

00:16:37 --> 00:16:39

We ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala to help

00:16:39 --> 00:16:41

us raise our kids in a good way,

00:16:41 --> 00:16:43

so make sure inshallah before your kids play

00:16:43 --> 00:16:45

video games or watch movies,

00:16:45 --> 00:16:47

make sure what is the content of the

00:16:47 --> 00:16:49

movie. What is it talking about? Shirk or

00:16:49 --> 00:16:53

violence or, you know, sympathizing with evil people?

00:16:53 --> 00:16:54

And we need to talk to our kids

00:16:54 --> 00:16:56

and try to keep this balance that this

00:16:56 --> 00:16:59

is not acceptable, this is not right. We're

00:16:59 --> 00:17:01

good people, and and in real life we

00:17:01 --> 00:17:03

try to help people and not shoot them

00:17:03 --> 00:17:04

for for points, for example.

00:17:05 --> 00:17:07

We ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala to give

00:17:07 --> 00:17:08

us the best in this life and the

00:17:08 --> 00:17:10

best in the life to come, missAllahu Wa

00:17:10 --> 00:17:10

Ta'ala.

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