Mustafa Khattab – Fairness Children
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses lessons learned from the Quran and the importance of justice among children. He explains that in the Quran, the lady's treatment of children is equal to her treatment of her siblings. The speaker also discusses the importance of giving gifts and not just giving them at once. Finally, he explains that expenses for marriage are not equal to expenses for children.
AI: Summary ©
So today, inshallah, we'll continue
our discussion
about
lessons that we learned from the Sahaba of
the Quranins and the prophet
And today's lesson is
justice among your children.
A poor lady came with 2 girls, her
2 daughters to Aisha, to
ask about something or to ask for something.
So Aisha, gave
her 3 dates, the fruits.
So she gave each of the 2 girls
one date, and the lady kept one for
herself. And when she she was about to
eat the date herself,
the kids, one of them, wanted to eat
it. So she split the date into half,
two halves, and she gave one half to
this and the second half to the other
one. So Aisha alaiha alhaab was surprised
because of the justice of the lady to
her kids. She she she could have just
given it to one of them, and that's
it. It is not a big deal.
By her justice to her kids.
Just that little
good deed at a time.
And I've seen this a lot. Yanivad Al
Aba,
they make their kids hate them,
and they make their kids hate each other
because of the treatment and also because
giving some
more
attention or some gifts more than others or
even in the distribution of miroth.
They don't like the distribution that Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala has given in the Quran.
They give more to some, and they don't
give some they don't give them anything.
And this is equal to saying that Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is not just.
If you don't
like the laws of inheritance that Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala has given us in the Quran,
this is equal to saying that Allah is
not just, and you do it your own
way.
And what happens after your death is the
kids hate you, and they hate each other,
and they don't talk to each other for
life.
And now you're not happy in your grave.
You wish you did it the right way.
And Nur
Mahinde bashir, one of the great sahaba, he
said that his mother bugged his father for
a whole year to give him a gift,
an extra thing that he didn't give to
the rest of his siblings.
So eventually,
he gave up and he said, okay. Okay.
Stop bugging me. And this is the word
used in the hadith. She was talking to
him day night for a whole year.
Eventually, he came to the prophet
and he said, my wife has been asking
for a whole year to give a gift
to my son. Something precious.
So the prophet said,
I came for you, oh prophet of Allah,
to witness over this. So the prophet
said, have you given each and every one
of your kids the same thing, the same
gift?
So I said,
okay. Quite frankly, no. So the prophet said,
go and ask for another witness because I
don't witness over injustice.
In another version of the hadith, the prophet
said, fear Allah
and be just to your kids. If you
wanna give one of them a gift, you
have to give each and every one of
them the same.
So the says
in that authentic hadith
that you have to when you give gifts
to your children, you have to give all
of them the same.
Boys and girls, you have to give them
the same thing. If you give each of
them a $100, you have to give, you
know, to everyone.
And as I said, back in the village,
back in the day, in the aid, they
used to give the boy
twice
the gift they give to the girl in
the aid. And the prophet, SAW, says in
the authentic hadith,
be fair
to your kids when you give them gifts.
Give them the same
to girls and boys. And if I were
to give to some more than others, I
would have given to the girls more than
the boys. He's talking about gifts.
Okay?
Inheritance is different, but now I'm talking about
gifts.
So when it comes to inheritance, we know
that in Islam,
the brother gets twice the share of his
sister his sister for two reasons. Number 1,
he has to provide for the family.
If there's no one to provide, he has
to provide. The lady doesn't have to provide
for no money. She keeps all the money
for herself
unless she willingly wants to help.
Number 2, at the time of marriage,
the man has to give a dowry, a
marriage gift to pay all the expenses for
marriage. Islamic league, the lady doesn't have to
pay anything.
To give to 1 more than the others,
you have to ask for the permission of
the rest. And if they agree, it becomes
a gift from them to their brother or
their sister in case someone of them is
very young or is handicapped or has a
mental problem. You can give him more with
his brothers or sisters after greatness Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala.
How about a different in nations? It's not
fair to give,
a $100 for 3 years old and $100
for 17 years old.
Okay. Pay a hadith. You give them the
same.
Because they're all at once, sometimes they work
and they have their own thing. So laptop
for 17 and laptop for a set of
3 years old. Okay. Look at this. If
you have someone who goes to college,
you pay them 1,000 of dollars
for fees and stuff.
But this is something you have to to
pay for them. But this is not a
gift. It is something you have to get.
But the little ones, if they go to
the, you know,
get that much. But the gift, which is
a sign of love from you to them,
has to be the same. But the expenses,
it doesn't have to be the same.
Like college
fees and stuff, you can give different money
to based on the age and their necessities.
But the gift has to be the same.
But it's a good question. We'll give you
candy.
Four questions.