Thematic Study of Sura Luqman #04 – Counselling without knowledge

Musleh Khan


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Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah Allah He have total Salah a woman while Mr. Barrett so you understand my answer. I'm not leaning to one side or the other because that would be wrong.

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And the only way I can do that is if I was involved in counseling a couple that had this problem then I could literally say, Okay, well

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Well, in this situation, here are the problems. And if you're unfairly and wrongfully throwing this responsibility on him, and just by default, like, all this is what I want to do, and I just don't care, as long as he's here, he can figure it out. No, he can say the same thing to you.

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I have to go to work, I have a full time job. So you need to just take care of the children and figure it out. So why do you have that choice and not him? Like I can sit there and just dig through and come come at it from that angle. But a general fat twin? No, it would be fundamentally wrong. Everybody's family situation is different.

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Okay. So let's get into we got a lot to cover today. Okay.

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We're finishing up. We've done this part of the we finished this a correct?

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Okay, we were here I believe,

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talking about commanding good and forbidding evil.

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And we said that commanding good and forbidding evil is really not a very accurate translation of a little bit of marital for Nicki O'Neil, Moon CO, it does capture some of the main

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trend and some of the main terms that are mentioned, but doesn't really capture the full extent of the intent behind the idea. So

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what we said is that I'm robi Murad off. When we say command good, is this, some more or less leaning towards command? Good meaning stand up for what is right, stand up for what is decent, whether in life, in your home, in society and so on. So your your ability to say no, that's wrong, has its time and place, it could simply mean that you wish, okay, you know what everybody else is going to go that direction, but that's not the right direction to go. Then just unfair direction is here.

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This mo Bill motto for now, here in Moncure.

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A lot of those who are advocates of the vaccination use versus like this and say, Look, you know, this is the right thing to do. And I for one, you've heard me say it already, it's the right thing to do. Unless somebody is going to cure Corona. This is the option you have whether you like it or not, whether if there's politics attached to it or not, I get all of that. But it's the right thing to do. Even if you are uncomfortable or you dislike think about the overall extent and picture behind it, the outcome later on the effect that it has on the people around you, the betterment of mankind. All of those things. Let's all this is why I'm saying this is what I'm standing up for.

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This is why I'm getting vaccinated. This is why I'm doing it. Avoid attention or public embarrassment, wisdom, wisdom, wisdom is the key. Now when Napoleon Hill mancha is also standing against what

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indecency. So it's the opposite of standing up for decency, you're standing up against any form of harm in decency and justice so on and so forth. So you see the difference when I say to you commend good it's it restricts the area to you literally standing up and voicing what you like or don't like.

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That's not how it works. Most of the times, it doesn't work that way. And that's why I wrote wisdom, wisdom is gotta be wise in how you

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practice this order in the Quran. Okay. So that makes you stand up in front of Allah and train says to stand up for Allah in front of everyone else. So take a look at it. So Allah makes you stand up in front of Allah and trains us to stand up for Allah

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in front of everyone else who is standing up for other than Allah.

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So Allah makes you stand up in front of Allah and trains you to stand up for Allah in front of everyone else.

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Make sense?

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Standing up for what is right easy, nope. Take a bird's eye view of life today.

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Two dimensions of personality. You either are grateful Shoka and if you're grateful, along that comes with sugar is patience. They go hand in hand they need each other. When you have patience, you're grateful you have this patience. And when you're grateful that requires a lot of patience. So it's two sides of the same coin. You lose patience, you lose gratitude. They go hand in hand. Look at my example. Open the fridge.

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All of us go through this. You open the fridge

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nothing to eat. Meanwhile, the fridge as well.

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is full

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you know if you really believe that it's one thing if there's nothing that I hoping to find in this fridge is one thing it was like oh we need to go do groceries

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you need to go and restock on this or that you got to really stop and think for a moment way are really saying all of these things are a reflection of your gratitude

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and again if you don't have it you start losing patience in everything in life so just keep that in mind

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well that'll sorry Kelly Nance will attempt she field model fill out the model in account in hola hola yo hippo coulomb of Italian for her oh man I love to say don't make faces at people while I also heard that Kelly nurse to saw a hot DECA saw out a hot dog. A facial expression that shows your pride or frustration there's no words all action facial expressions have to also be humble. So Allah says don't make faces that people you know some people when they look at you like this

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brother anyone even say brother or sister or anything

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Yeah, that's to say that calenus

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You don't say nothing people notice you from a distance and they're like, Oh my God, because why? Most unhappy person in the whole masjid.

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And guess what? They're in charge of something.

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They're in charge. So it's one thing when you're just unhappy and it's another thing when you're given some kind of leadership or control you're the wrong person for the job unless it in an in another soda? Nola Hey moto calm. And to adult amenity. Isla Alia Allah ordered you to give responsibility to the people who are right for it. Don't make people do things that you know that they're they don't have no patience. They're always bitter. They always lose control. And if you really want to see this come to life, just go for Jomar somewhere

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and see how volunteers act. I'll have just Ecolo heighten for your service. volunteering your time. There's another problem though. That you have is you're not nice to people. Be nice to people if they're sitting in the wrong spot. Oh, brother, what are you doing? Oh Subhanallah your ears do they work over there? Don't talk you don't have the right to talk to people like that.

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Haram una like you will be accountable for Allah for showing that in front of Allah for showing attitude.

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That's to slide deck. This is one of the advice of Lokman earlier he said to his son don't make faces and then next don't while attempts you fill out the motto hell and don't walk on the earth posing and struggling you know that is

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you just walk Yeah. How's my mess? Should I help you see that brick over there? I put it there. See that door I installed there is grass. I cut it. See the parking lot I

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see this message see this school? See this institute? Yeah, I gave the biggest donation. And I saw this one time. A brother sponsored a Syrian family and poor family, right? Mother Father and they had like five kids. Just a beautiful war torn fat family standing in the corner. They don't understand English brothers sponsor them literally shouted at all of us when we were around those after Jumar one day and say yeah, this is my family. I sponsored I bought them. Yeah, I'm glad they came. Because you know, I really worked hard. And I spotted the he almost talked to me like he purchased slaves from somewhere, right? Yeah, I got a discount. Here they are.

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That's what attempts you feel are the motto here. Don't just walk in act as though you own something, you own nothing. You actually don't even own yourself.

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we own ourselves.

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Does anybody know the idea? To prove that? What do you say when somebody dies?

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What does it mean?

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What does it mean? We all what belongs belong to? What do you say that we all do? We say it all the time. We all are owned by Allah.

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Even though people we say this a when somebody dies, the idea was revealed to dead people or people who are alive.

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People who are alive.

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So even though it's used to remind yourself you're going back to Allah, Allah, the audience of the I O where people were the Sahaba

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was right in front of us. I said, there's teaching them in LA he went in a lake or Jordan. So well that time she fell out of the Motorhead, this is stage one of pride.

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Okay, so make sure you note that pride has three main stages, we're going to see all three of them in a moment. This is the first stage where someone has pride in their facial expression.

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And that eventually trickles down to their behavior their action.

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In Allahu Allah you hippo Kula Matalan for her is the next stage of pride. Allah does not love any of the motel and the whole.

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motel comes from this word, Heil.

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Look at what Hi Alice,

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you ever watched those like, videos where you see the beautiful horse just kind of running around in the farm, and the main of the horse and the tail is waving. And it's, you know, it's just beautiful.

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If you look at beautiful images of anything, what, like animals are so on what's always going to be in that image, a beautiful horse, it is one of the most beautiful animals ever. And it's also a representation of beauty.

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Hale is that kind of horse. It's the kind of horse that strikes around showing off its beauty.

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And it's lost. It's almost like so if you apply that with human beings, it's like somebody who's lost in their own imagination of who they think they are. Not how others perceive them. So somebody will be like, you know?

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Yeah, man. I mean, it's an extreme example, but somebody who's like yet Oh, some people. Yeah, I mean, I might be sick, but I don't look at. I mean, look, my skin is great. My posture is perfect. I exercise every day. Yeah, man. Nobody can ever tell.

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Nobody that's called hail.

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Right? You're you're lost in this imagination pretending to be somebody you're not.

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Young people have this big problem more more so than anyone else. Because why they're exposed to it. You see a guy you know, go to high school or what have you and walk a certain way, act a certain way behave a certain way. Now all of a sudden you get your son back home and you can't understand what he's saying you can't recognize the way he looks. That's called height. Unless he hates people who have height and Allah Allah doesn't love them anyway. Someone who has an imaginative perception about him or herself through the strut around like a horse, pretend to be something you're not for horror.

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For horror, so this is the second stage of pride.

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This is the full extreme pride in and of itself. So three stages Mara motel and for horror all mentioned in one Aya Mara motel in fact, whoa, what is moto? This is Mark, guys. Just so you capture right here. So Allah says that he doesn't like people who behave and act as though they have pride Moto and to sign hada is hard. That is one number two, motel and number three for horror. Okay. And it's right here. So now you know what for horror is. So for horror is a combination of motel and model for horror. You have it all now, not only do you have pride in your action, not only is it in your, like facial expression, but now you even have for horror for horror. It's in your voice you

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talk and you sound like somebody's full of themselves.

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May Allah protect us from the

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welcome Sidhi Misha look at the last piece of advice Look, man, give to son now. What's the female shake? Well Ludeman soltec be balanced in the way that you walk meaning avoid extremes and lower your voice. So your voice should keep calm even when advising or getting yelled at. So what was said fi machinic

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Let's just relax. Walk like a normal person. Number two, local well do the mean Celtic.

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Wildwood comes from the word hot dune.

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Students have sought it unknown Do you guys remember the a of lowering the gaze?

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Remember, we talked about your eyes?

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To control what you look at will ultimately result in controlling what you do.

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If you control your eyes,

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your heart will never suffer the consequences of your action.

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So if you make a mistake, your heart doesn't make that mistake. It's just your action because why your eyes are under control. If you lose sight

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Have you lose control of your eyes?

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Then it's easy for your heart now to become desensitized to what is wrong. So it wants to now follow and do whatever it feels like doing so your actions manifest from them.

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Allah says here we'll build them in so tick, lower your voice in Ankara. Tila salt Wilhemina. No doubt about it. The ugliest sounds that can be made is the sound of a donkey.

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In cultures all over the world,

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perhaps even here as well. How are donkeys perceived?

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Okay, don't, don't answer. But you will all know how donkeys are perceived. How do you call somebody who acts crazy and out of their mind or playing stupid? Think about it, right? Cultures all across the globe do that. They associate stupidity to the donkey. So that's why Allah spoke in this manner. It wasn't to shame the donkey itself. But if this is while people could really truly grasp, grasp the point of this verse. Allah says, When you listen to the sound of a donkey, that's how you sound if you can control your tone of your voice.

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So basically, Allah is saying, the ugliest sounds that can be made is the sound of a donkey. So in other words, if you're somebody that struggles to control the tone of their voice, Allah says, Yeah, you know, sound like a donkey donkey. And that's the ugliest voice by the way. Imagine telling someone that

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encounter encourage us worthless, a little heavier. Every time they raise their voice carelessly. This is not time as somebody who naturally has allowed was just somebody who intentionally raises their voice to for whatever reason intentionally done. Why is Look man comparing his son to a donkey. If you get loud, you didn't internalize anything. Why don't people get loud? Intentionally? Why did they do that?

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Why do people raise their voice? In anything? Whether or not just an argument, like if you're just trying to get across instruction, and it's not working the first the second time? Then the voice gets louder and louder. Yeah.

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Okay, so they believe like my way or the highway kind of thing. So why the loud voice?

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Okay, so to gain the attention, but there are other ways to do it.

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You don't necessarily have to raise your voice specifically, why raise your voice?

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It's the demand to be in charge and control.

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Is that right? Does that sound right? You're wrong.

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Secondly, another reason why people raise their voice is usually because they're running out of things to say.

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Think about an argument, husband and wife going at each other. And then you know, he gets stumped. Or she gets them like there's don't oils.

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I don't care. They just go at each other. So another reason is usually because you're running out of things to say so just start screaming. Think about a hater. Think about somebody who loses their mind out there. What is what did they do? If you're too smart because you respond with intelligence and they don't know how to respond to that just scream at you. What did Allah say to do when somebody screams at you

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like say salaam like actual word Salah

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You're right? Tell me what

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so when you say say salam put it together, what you're doing is you're responding in a dignified in a civilized way. So it could be ignoring, but it could also be someone's yelling, it was like, just relax. Actually, I'll wait till you're finished. You done. Okay, you ready to talk? That sort of thing?

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That's salah.

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And sometimes if it's really out of control, you just walk away.

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That's salah. Or even if you can calm the person because you know some people they're fueled by your communists,

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their fuel or what? You think you're better. They just go at you even more.

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So sometimes you remember you got to be wise how you do that. But the point is, they're loudness is not breaking you down. When you can keep yourself together. You

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You fulfill Salah you fulfilled what Allah wants peace keep things as peaceful as possible. Easier said than done right?

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Why is Look man comparing himself to his son to the donkey? Because just like the donkey, the way the donkey behaves in the way that it sounds it's it's not a pleasant sound like nobody has a ring tone of a donkeys voice

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right? You have like a cat or something but nobody has a donkeys voice and if somebody did, what kind of attention would that bring? Oh, what in the world so that's why look man says it's like as if you you got nothing, because you're still acting this way out of control, complete disregard for you know authority for being civilized and and you've completely disregarded everything. So you'll essentially just become like that. Like a stray donkey just roaming around. No one cares about yella.

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Lm taro and Allah.

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Didn't they see? Allah Subhana Allah coolmath is somewhat you wanna fill out that Allah submitted for you everything in the sky and the earth. Now we have shifted away and completed the advice of Lookman Alayhis Salam. Now we move on to the next section of the surah which will lead us to the end.

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So now when it's all said and done, this is Allah's voice. This is Allah's conversation. He takes it over now. Lm Tara and Allah has LM todo en Allah subhanaw taala Kumasi semi wet woman fill out didn't they see that Allah submitted for you everything in the sky and the earth?

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Well as Bella Ali he Nerimon who Avahi rotten Well, Tina, and he unleashed completed and filled onto all kinds of His favors.

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The ones you can see, and the ones who can't even see let's pause right here, okay. When you see the entire sky and earth subdued to you, what should that do this

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when you see the sky and the earth, all at your service, when we need sunlight we needed if Sun if the sun stop setting and excuse me stop rising, but what happened to Earth

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would be in in inhabitable, you would never survive here. The sun is the source of life by Allah's Will for not just this planet, but all the planets, right? That's why when you look at all the planets orbiting space, the biggest planet of course is the sun and within within its parameter is all of the different planets so Earth Mars Mercury Juppe all of them Saturn Pluto Neptune everything and they all feed off and get the gain their energy from the sun. So Allah is telling you and I

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that this is actually one of his greatest favors that you see the sun every day. And you see the moon it's it sets it because too much sun is also deadly. So when you look and you reflect on all of that, it should cause you to be somewhat humble and appreciative. My question to you students is this why are we reading this a p&l? Why did it come after the the advice of look man Ali's

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Why is Allah talking to us about the world around us after the advice of Lookman?

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Okay, look, man already did this. So where does that leave his son?

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It's just like, it's like the father already experienced it. So what about his kids?

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Pretty much so the boundaries

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so that does that guarantee that his son is going to appreciate the lesson in the say.

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You still teach your children.

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So here's the thing, what was the secret behind all of the advice of Luqman Alehissalaam to his son.

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There's a hidden gem which will connect you directly to this. So follow me. Look, man and his son. Is that an individual conversation between him and his son? That's it. There's nothing to do with the world around you. Right? What do you call that? When you're being advised?

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one on one and you're being taught one on one. This is therapy. This is counsel, this is one on one teaching. What's the goal behind one on one teaching? Is it to help the world around you or you're just helping the person in front of you? Just the person in front of you. So what happened just now is we came out of individual training. It was about you, once you fix yourself, then you can appreciate the world around you.

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That's what happened here.

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How do we teach Islam generally to our children?

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Think about it.

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We usually tell us to be nice to people don't back like that. We teach them basic mannerisms. And sometimes we forget. But once we bring them back to our home, you know, when they go to the guests, okay, sit there, don't move, don't talk mobile, you discipline at all. But once they get to their home,

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they become like literally tornado type tilt children just out of control.

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It should be that the way they behave outside should be the same as as much as possible on the inside, whatever I say seven, say about the best of you are the ones who are best to whom.

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Especially who

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there's one person that's singled out from the whole family, another Hadith, the best of you are the ones who was best to they're

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the wife, mom.

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So if you want to be good to your whole family, where's the starting point?

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Take care of Mom, take care of your wife.

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You take care of her, your rest, the rest of the houses will function, it's peaceful.

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Who thinks about it this way? SubhanAllah. That's my point. You know, I could say all of these things to you, I can quote them too. But then when you look at and you apply that, in contrast to what happens in our homes in life,

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it's just really, really disappointing.

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And when we teach our children Islam, we want them to be the best representation of us, Don't embarrass us, they'll make a fool out of me, blah, blah, blah, blah, which are great, important rules. But what was the priority to Allah, the last like, six, seven verses Allah was all about you look in the mirror, you, you, you, you, you fix yourself, before you start going to join the board member of the masajid to go and volunteer your time at Charity, to give to the community, you need to put your heart in the state of spiritual emergency and fix that you have a problem.

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And you need to address it. And only then now you can start to appreciate and be grateful for things around you. Subhanallah, right.

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We see this example all the time, but I'll get to it a little bit later. Okay.

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So the sun never flares up. So in contrast, we'll get the sun never flares up, the sky never falls, everything stays on CT, on course. That's called S Bella. So you're grateful for all of his blessings. Now that you have light guidance of how to communicate, walk, carry yourself, speak wisdom, humble. So all of look, man Alehissalaam his advice. So you don't become like a donkey. Now you've done all of this now you can start to appreciate a life.

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So I'm going to ask you all something.

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How do you?

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How do you instill the advice of lachemann or Alayhis Salam in 2021 to your children?

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You don't have to quote me I know. So now you've seen the advice we've dissected. We've looked at it, we understand it. So how do you do this?

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Do you have to sit and make time and lecture your children?

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Sometimes do you have to sit and maybe teach them once in a while? Hey, look, you know this story of of this of Sora Look man, I really want to tell you about it. Sometimes you should. Yeah.

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You should have so here's a here's how you can take a lot of his advice and implemented in families of today. Number one, you have to have Halaqa time with your children at least once a week. You know what Halaqaat time is

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you got to be able to just sit and have a conversation about Islam

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just Islamic stuff.

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And that should always include something from Quran or Hadith somewhere anything you see your your children just playing with toys or you know the Prophet, the Prophet peace we were used to play with toys to with kids. He used to sit with them throw rocks and they would draw like in the sand with these rocks is to do all of that is the left for children.

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You see like your wife cleaning or something sweeping or whatever.

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So, you go and you take the vacuum like oil Do you know the process seldom used to do housework?

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Yeah. used to clean up sweep is to do housework.

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So you you make moments in your daily life a point of reflection and reminder, you got to do that.

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You must do that at least once a week where you are sitting at the dinner table you're eating, what have you, and you're just chatting. Don't make it weird. Like don't be like, okay, sunset Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim, Al hamdu Lillahi wa, like, Don't make it weird. Just be yourself.

00:35:39--> 00:36:07

Number two, if your children are not in a class, and Islamic class once a week, it's a tragedy. It is an absolute tragedy in the family when it comes to instilling Islamic Guidance in them. Why? Why would you trust your child to be in an environment six and seven hours a day, that is not an Islamic environment. But trust that they will come full with Islam at the end of the day?

00:36:08--> 00:36:24

And they have nothing to counter that exposure? In places like this, they have none of this. Why would you? Why would you expect that ultimately at the end, they will still be proud of their identity. That's how you start to corrupt

00:36:25--> 00:36:47

their actual their state of mind, which ultimately now starts to affect their fitrah they know who Allah is. They understand what the right thing to do. But their mindset, their intellect, their intelligence, doesn't allow them to do it. Why? Because they're not being taught. They're not countering all the things they're exposed to, with something positive tragedy,

00:36:48--> 00:37:01

absolute tragedy, really difficult to recover if it's too late. So there's two things. Number three, if your children need counsel,

00:37:02--> 00:37:22

give them counsel, meaning you may not be the person if they have any sort of really like strange problems, things on their mind. They need to talk to somebody provide that opportunity for them that open space for them to talk. What makes a good listener students. How do you know you're a good listener?

00:37:24--> 00:37:24

How do you know?

00:37:28--> 00:37:28


00:37:31--> 00:37:32

would the advice you give

00:37:34--> 00:37:39

you become a graphic No, okay. No, that just means that your ears work.

00:37:40--> 00:38:01

Especially when you tell somebody Okay, repeat what I've said. And they repeat it to you. It doesn't mean they're a good listener. It just means that they're hearing they're hearing is good. Mashallah, you heard everything I said? How do you create a space where people can be heard? This is how you do it. These are experts for me, experts tell teachers this

00:38:03--> 00:38:20

you become a good listener. When you eliminate distraction, and you create a space for somebody to be heard. So your phone you put that away. There's a whole Suppan lemon, really? Oh my gosh.

00:38:22--> 00:38:24

Okay, okay, just, just just hold that thought. Give me one second.

00:38:26--> 00:38:30

Ron, you're the wrong person. You need to go home. You're not the right person to talk to.

00:38:31--> 00:38:33

Here's how you should respond.

00:38:34--> 00:38:39

Eye contact. Most important, look at them. Number two.

00:38:40--> 00:38:43

Experts teach us respond with

00:38:44--> 00:38:49

affirmation. Like, really supine. Oh, tell me more.

00:38:50--> 00:39:01

On that point you just mentioned how'd you feel when that happened? When you do that, if they'll tell you him or him a hula said, you have mastered 90% of

00:39:02--> 00:39:47

90% of knowledge now will be given to you because you've created a space either for yourself or someone else where they can be heard. The number one audience for that as your children use I know when mom's cooking Yeah, what's out what are you crying for? Go get a tissue come back. We you should do is okay, when I'm done. I'll come back to you. Don't go anywhere. I promise you when I'm done here. I'll sit with you. You will be shocked that if you do that maybe once or twice you have you would have solved solve the problem that could have lingered and lingered on for weeks, months and maybe even years. You killed it right there because why you provided a space for somebody that

00:39:47--> 00:39:52

they can be heard. Psychologist and experts say

00:39:53--> 00:39:55

90% of counseling is what?

00:39:58--> 00:39:59

Just listening

00:40:00--> 00:40:05

giving the person the opportunity to say what they want to say but at least making them feel that they're being heard.

00:40:06--> 00:40:07


00:40:09--> 00:40:13

at the end of the day, all that look man either he salaam did,

00:40:14--> 00:40:26

and for his son to be able to internalize and understand, gave His Son the opportunity that he can advise and that the son can listen and learn.

00:40:27--> 00:40:34

Really, really simple but very effective. Above it, he Nero Mahoba hero 10 Rebel Tina.

00:40:36--> 00:40:38

Then Allah continues on he says,

00:40:39--> 00:40:48

the ones that you can see in the ones that you can see, so there are things around us we can see, tell me something that we can see students that's a blessing to us. What can't we see?

00:40:50--> 00:40:51

We're inhaling it right now.

00:40:53--> 00:40:53

Okay, what else?

00:40:55--> 00:41:00

Tell me something just in life you can't see but Subhanallah without it to be nothing.

00:41:05--> 00:41:06


00:41:07--> 00:41:25

Our internet, the internals of our bodies, we don't know anything about what's going on in there. But alhamdulillah your hearts working? brains working, your eyes are working. Meaning just everything is just working. So like if you sit down and you start thinking that way, you will never stop the list will never be exhausted

00:41:30--> 00:41:47

will mean an SE may you judge? It'll filter behavior any mean whatever who don't want to Kitabi Munia. And then there are some people who debate about Allah. Without any knowledge will mean an SMA you deal with filler. Jeddah Allah.

00:41:48--> 00:41:53

Allah said in another sort of wedge deal whom Billa t here arson jendela

00:41:54--> 00:42:37

is right here. So we have a couple of things. When you put something on domesticate an animal science, think about chaos, they think about the universe. So this goes back to the conversation about in context, how scientists study the sky, the Earth, the rotation of planets, the rotation of the Earth, orbiting the Earth, all of these things. This is one of the eight that help us to understand some of the functionality behind it and again, blessing from Allah. Right now you have the International Space Station that orbits the Earth like 16 times a day out of space every single day all day, they see the sunrise and sunset, a roughly over a dozen times in one circle. So to be

00:42:37--> 00:42:50

able to do that, and create a system or machine that can orbit the Earth and study the planet and study space and nnn all of this is captured within this amazing, amazing, amazing science.

00:42:52--> 00:43:05

Well as both are really narrow Mahoba hero Tom LaBelle, Tina Isbell, the leave no stone unturned in a finishing test. This is the word that I want to get to Jeddah from GDL aggressive form of debate.

00:43:06--> 00:43:17

Take a look. When they're aggressively talking like that about Allah. Every one of us knows this a this part of the A because we we experienced this all the time.

00:43:18--> 00:43:44

Brother Brother, what are you doing? A staford Allah, that's called G del, you might be saying the right thing. But when you're aggressive in your tone in your speech and your choice of words, like you ever see like on YouTube guys arguing Islam, or arguing with an atheist, a Christian and so on. Yeah, but your Bible says this and others go Yeah, but the Quran said that and they're just going back and forth. That's called G del aggressively debating Allah.

00:43:46--> 00:43:54

Allah is upset and dislikes that. That's not. That's not how you introduce Allah to someone.

00:43:57--> 00:43:58

Think about now go back to parents.

00:44:00--> 00:44:02

If you eat that ice cream before dinner

00:44:03--> 00:44:05

shaitan is gonna come into your dream.

00:44:06--> 00:44:09

That's Jeddah. That's Judah. Kids gonna be terrified.

00:44:12--> 00:44:22

Kids got to be terribly. That's what Allah says. Don't do that. So if you're talking about the beard, the hijab, and getting and it's all getting you upset. That's when you know you're falling into jail.

00:44:23--> 00:44:31

And you see, you know, your daughter likes that guy. Oh, the biller. That's how I raised you shaitan went in you. As a matter of fact, you're shaitan now

00:44:32--> 00:44:33


00:44:35--> 00:44:58

It's called being a human being. And we were given something called feelings. That's an expression of it. She likes a see like somebody or somebody likes her or your son. You know, sometimes, you know I meet couples have some time. A lot of times I meet parents, whether Musleh is obviously pre COVID to bring their kids to me and other ones. So please, counsel counsel, okay, what's going on?

00:44:59--> 00:44:59

Probably wants to

00:45:00--> 00:45:03

To get married SubhanAllah. And he's in love with a girl.

00:45:04--> 00:45:21

Okay, how old is he? He's 30 years old, but he's still in universities almost fit bubble oval. Like, no, I'm not going to counsel, you should be very happy, first and foremost that he's actually thinking about marriage. And he's like, oh, yeah, he got some girl pregnant.

00:45:23--> 00:46:04

Or he moved out of the house without you knowing. So Hyundai learner, with a muffler, please do some roll here on him. So he can just come to you talking about it stuff, we're still trying to figure out how to counsel Believe it or not. I understand the emotion though. Because when you're a parent, and your child comes to you with these kinds of feelings or conversation, it's scary. And I think that's where giving the benefit of that where a lot of parents are coming from, but just really not very good at expressing it is that they're scared because they don't want their children to be vulnerable or make mistakes. So if that's the case, yes, we can work through that and help nurture

00:46:04--> 00:46:25

and guide that your children. But when they come to and be like, Yeah, I have a crush on him. Or you always see that whenever he's around. He's always just like, close by fixing the hijab every five seconds, and he has the neatest beard in the world. And his Twitter's cologne, you can smell it from here, all the way to the traffic light. And it just only happens to be when your daughter is around.

00:46:26--> 00:46:28

It's not necessarily a bad thing.

00:46:30--> 00:47:12

Right? You don't don't look down at moments like that. Because especially when they are two good people, your child and the other person. It's something that you need to investigate. That's all just investigate and be proud and say Alhamdulillah, that it could have been so much worse. Preserve your dignity with three things mentioned in this verse, knowledge, guidance in the book of light. So three things in this one verse are all captured, that help us to preserve dignity, respect for ourselves and those around you. You have to seek your N. Allah blesses you with guidance, and you have the Quran, three things, you have these three things you hold on to them, you will always have

00:47:12--> 00:47:16

that sense of respect and dignity for yourself and those around you.

00:47:17--> 00:47:21

You must have more respect for Allah's book, not just a formality.

00:47:22--> 00:47:34

Spoons versus the reminder, we're coming to that, okay. When I say spoons, like the actual spoon versus a remind. So the reason why I say spoon is

00:47:36--> 00:47:39

the Quran uses a term called horror or

00:47:41--> 00:47:56

horror or horror or means something that is deceiving, but you depend on it. So like a spoon, like, it's just a spoon, but you don't look at the spoon like God, where would my life be without you.

00:47:58--> 00:48:05

It's just a spoon. So when you're done with it, you just whatever. And if you lose it, break it destroy, you just buy another one case closed.

00:48:06--> 00:48:45

So Allah tells us that don't get caught up in horror. Because this kind of conversation, this kind of this level of debate where the shouting match happens on the arguments and so on is a kind of a whole, you could be easily convinced that you need to express Islam in that way. But you're actually causing a whole lot more damage. So don't depend on presenting yourself in that manner. And instead, stick to the reminder. Parents What's the secret when it comes to teaching your Islam to children? One secret? Don't ever forget it. But you all know it. Does anybody have an idea what it is?

00:48:46--> 00:48:53

Never give up on reminders.

00:48:54--> 00:48:57

Never give up reminding your children.

00:48:58--> 00:49:17

The biggest tragedy ever. If you can't teach them fine. They won't listen to you fine. They'll never come to the class fine. They'll never go to a class on their own fine. You're trying try and try. You know there's one thing that never ever shuts down.

00:49:18--> 00:49:20

Just reminding your children

00:49:21--> 00:49:30

Oh, that's not right. Why you have to talk like that. No, go, go put something on a little bit better. That's what Allah loves. Come on. Did you pray today?

00:49:31--> 00:49:35

You're 56 years old. Did you pray to her?

00:49:36--> 00:49:49

That you pray also? Your mare you have grandchildren? You have great grandkids Did you pray? Did you fast this one. Are you fasting today? And you know something moms are the best at this.

00:49:51--> 00:49:59

Moms eventually break their kids. Sometimes it takes a long time but when you have a mom that is old and frail

00:50:00--> 00:50:01

She's still looking at her son.

00:50:02--> 00:50:06

She's just got days left in her life. But she says like, do do pray.

00:50:08--> 00:50:14

Oh, man, at some point, it breaks the side just like oh my god. I never listened to you in my whole life.

00:50:16--> 00:50:20

Now, when I want to listen to you, I can barely hear you.

00:50:22--> 00:50:36

Moms are different. And we have already talked about that. Mums are different is everything about them? It's just different. And even if somebody isn't your mum, but they are a mother, when they talk to you, it's different.

00:50:37--> 00:50:41

When they talk to you is different. You know, one time a sister came to me, I was in Montreal.

00:50:42--> 00:50:50

And, you know, I believe she passed away. She was one of the most hard she was one of the hardest working volunteers in Canada.

00:50:52--> 00:51:30

And one day she saw me at a conference and she came up to me she says, like hon, I said, Yes sister, old sister lady, and I have a thing with the elderly. I enjoy their company quite a bit. Style Sudan Somali Come sister, how can I help you? What can I tell everybody leave me alone. Like let me talk to him or sister said look. I really want you to do me. Do me a favor. do me one favor. I said okay. He said that every time you get a chance to do something for free without any return to it, and and make dua for me when you're doing it.

00:51:31--> 00:51:53

So anytime I do any kind of sadaqa charity work, whatever, just remember her and pray for her but keep doing that as much as you can. That's all she said. I never saw her again and like I said, I heard she passed away. And subhanAllah till this day. That advice came to me as if it came from my own mother.

00:51:54--> 00:52:10

I just like man, mothers are different even if they repeat a sentence you've heard your whole life but when they say it is different. This is why I say to you mothers and fathers both never give up on your children never give up on

00:52:13--> 00:52:14

let's continue

00:52:15--> 00:52:25

when it is said to them what is up Ilana Houma Toby OMA ins that Allah whatever it is set to them, closely follow what Allah has sent down.

00:52:26--> 00:52:38

They would respond Palu Bella Jatin Ali burner, rather we'd follow we will follow whatever our forefathers committed to

00:52:39--> 00:53:11

Palu Belknap Tebbe Roma, jedynie la he had an A so this is culture. When you when the Koran says that we're going to follow what our fathers or our forefathers left behind that's culture that's like the same as you and I saying, Well, this is how I grew up. So my parents taught me and then a community taught me is how I did it my whole life. So Allah is equating that attitude with the how the machinery machinery causing us to respond to the process. We did this our whole life and now you're going to come and tell us to do it differently. Same thing.

00:53:13--> 00:53:30

Oh, well can listen to this i Oh, can a shaitan he had the room ILA either be scarier. Or had it been that shaitan was calling them to the punishment of a blazing fire. You see what just happen? When people are married to culture, then the ultimate result is punishment.

00:53:32--> 00:53:47

When people are addicted to cultural practices, I'm not talking about the halal stuff. I'm talking about the things that cross Islamic boundaries. Islam never came to eliminate culture it came to clean it up.

00:53:48--> 00:53:55

You can have your culture but the bad habits that come along with that that's what Islam said okay, okay. You can't have that

00:53:56--> 00:54:25

Yeah, before you used to like sing after your prayers you can't do that that was a cultural thing don't do that anymore. Before used to eat a certain way used to act a certain way used to celebrate a certainly used to dress a certain way. You can't do that because Islam said no. And then Allah credited that that's how shaytaan calls you some kind of law. So keep that in mind. Parents form respect but not everything they say is correct. Look man was given Williams wisdom and not all fathers have it. Okay.

00:54:29--> 00:54:45

Oh, either Peter Schiff, woman and so woman Ustream watcher who Illa Wahoo Emerson, okay. And whoever would submit his face while may use slim watch her who Illa whoever submits his face to Allah.

00:54:46--> 00:54:55

Well, who are Morrison Wiles he excels in his submission. So what is Morrison comes from the word Exxon. Do you guys know what Exxon is? Right?

00:54:56--> 00:54:57

What's going

00:54:59--> 00:54:59


00:55:01--> 00:55:02

What's the lesson?

00:55:05--> 00:55:16

Good. So, process Selim said, Seven is when you worship Allah as though you see him even though you can't see him he sees you. Okay, what does that mean?

00:55:18--> 00:55:22

Worship Allah as though I see him. How do you do that? Is that even mean?

00:55:23--> 00:55:24

It's like this

00:55:27--> 00:55:31

you're living your life as though you're always being watched.

00:55:32--> 00:55:33

That's called

00:55:36--> 00:55:47

all there's 24 hour a day surveillance from the sky, and you're always conscious of it. That said, and the one who practices Sn is called Morrison

00:55:48--> 00:56:06

that says that's the title they're given process. Some says that Sn is the highest level of Eman. If you really want to taste how sweet faith is, and even is, that's where you want to be. You want to be at the level of asset how you get there is a whole course by itself.

00:56:08--> 00:56:09

Quick question.

00:56:10--> 00:56:11

Finish this area for me.

00:56:13--> 00:56:15

What Bill Well, he Dany

00:56:17--> 00:56:18


00:56:19--> 00:56:22

and be good to your parents. I said.

00:56:24--> 00:56:36

Well, Bill Well today, Mom and Dad. Allah says that when it's time to respect your parents, you need to have a son. Same word. So put it all together. Watch how amazing this is.

00:56:37--> 00:56:44

The peak the climax. The Mount Everest of Eman is called SN.

00:56:46--> 00:56:54

Allah says when you're treating your parents, the way you treat them, you start with SN

00:56:56--> 00:56:58

that's what you start with.

00:57:00--> 00:57:04

So there is no room to mess up when you're dealing with your parents.

00:57:05--> 00:57:12

That's how Allah wants you to start you start with the best version of yourself.

00:57:14--> 00:57:26

Unbelievable. Just the language alone sets the tone of the relationship between children and parents. If only it was understood that way. You start off with her said.

00:57:29--> 00:58:18

Allah continues and he says vaca stem circular Otowa till with all what you Allah here are pivotal more, then he is held on into an anchor. And Allah alone, the final outcome of his of deeds are going to be sent. So in other words, he excels in his submission. But he holds on in hope that Allah will accept this now from him. So you hold on it's it's a it's imagery in the Quran. Because he knows that the end of the day is that not only is he going through the exam, which is this world, it's like a big test, but the results and the grades, the outcome, all of that's going to be submitted to Allah as well. Right? So that imagery, then Allah continues.

00:58:20--> 00:58:29

Woman cafardo Fela zonecheck Khufu then whoever disbelieved don't let their disbelief grief you

00:58:30--> 00:58:32

students what is that talking about?

00:58:33--> 00:58:37

Wherever disbelief don't let the their disbelief grieve you don't let it upset you.

00:58:39--> 00:58:43

So if anybody reversed their faith and they went into disbelief

00:58:44--> 00:58:47

Allah is saying don't let it get to you too much.

00:58:49--> 00:58:51

What less Elaine

00:58:54--> 00:58:59

in to us is their final return Elena model Giro home

00:59:01--> 00:59:13

to us they're going to come back and they're going to in their final return is going to in going to be stripping is going to be then we're going to thoroughly inform them.

00:59:15--> 00:59:17

Fenn will not be or home Bhima needle

00:59:18--> 00:59:19

what they used to do

00:59:20--> 00:59:28

in Allah Ali Moon be that your pseudo Allah is fully knowledgeable of the nature of their chests, students what does that mean?

00:59:29--> 00:59:35

Allah is fully knowledgeable of the nature of their chests because I mean take a look right here

00:59:38--> 00:59:47

you know, somebody will be like really nice to you. Cool, Mashallah. You're getting married, but in their chest in their heart, they're like, Damn, you

00:59:49--> 00:59:49

can't believe you're

00:59:51--> 00:59:58

there like yeah, I just got engaged to so and so. But meanwhile, he or she was hoping to get engaged. No

01:00:00--> 01:00:04

May you end up in divorce before you're married? You know that kind of feeling inside

01:00:06--> 01:00:06


01:00:08--> 01:00:18

That's what Allah says. Yeah, those thoughts you have in your chest Oh yeah, I'm going to ask you about them. So look, we get asked about our feelings too

01:00:20--> 01:00:32

Allah continues no material whom Allah Allah says leave them for some no material whom Allah let them enjoy for just a bit then we will drag them

01:00:34--> 01:00:49

to an unrelenting punishment. So many third room Isla either been Holly youth in this world luxuries, health car toy, they have it all. So let them enjoy the stuff for a little while.

01:00:50--> 01:00:58

You know, this area when it really got to me, when I started to feel myself slowing down through age,

01:01:00--> 01:01:05

all of us go through that, right? You start feeling yourself you're not running as fast as you used to.

01:01:06--> 01:01:08

When you think I'm not old.

01:01:10--> 01:01:15

I appreciate I'll take that as a compliment. But don't be fooled by the hidden that I use. Okay.

01:01:18--> 01:01:26

We notice you. You notice when you walk up the stairs and you're just like, who added an extra five stairs to this house like Subhanallah

01:01:27--> 01:01:33

and then every time when you're at the mall, and you see that bench

01:01:34--> 01:01:41

that is like almost the only reason you go to the mall. Forget the stores you see that? Want to sit on it.

01:01:43--> 01:01:56

You start getting like that. That's when you realize the panel lemon. That time where you enjoyed all the energy and all of these toys and luxuries men. It really just came and went.

01:01:58--> 01:02:18

Oh golly. It's hard that punishment. If they don't realize and they get addicted to this stuff, Allah says he will drag them to an unrelenting punishment. This is a one of dozens of words in the Koran to describe punishment, Lille, Lille. It's the kind of punishment that has no conscience.

01:02:20--> 01:02:32

So just think about like, how the soldier will beat the enemy, just to the ground, don't nothing. You can plead your case all you want, it's done. That's the holy of

01:02:33--> 01:02:57

if you were to ask what to insert into human Holocaust, some wealthy will outlay a pool lunula if you were to ask who created the skies, and the earth, they would absolutely say is Allah, that's how much should be cone and disbelievers in general will respond if they were really truly honest. It's called fedora. Fedora is the thing, it's the knowledge that you and I were designed and created with.

01:02:58--> 01:03:07

And nothing really can corrupt it. So for example, every single religion on the planet is connected to the one true creator in some way, shape, or form.

01:03:08--> 01:03:17

Or they understand that there is an ultimate god out there. But they have their own version of how they choose to worship. And we'll get to that one God,

01:03:18--> 01:03:20

every single one of us.

01:03:21--> 01:03:31

We were born with this fitrah that we know when we do something good, it feels good. Nobody has to teach you to feel good when you do something good. That's called your FITARA.

01:03:32--> 01:03:47

When you do the right thing, you don't just say man, it's been such a terrible day. I've been obeying laws and following rules, horrible. You don't do that. It's naturally instilled with us. So Allah is teaching us here as well.

01:03:48--> 01:04:06

That this particular AI at the end of the day, when those who disbelieved to the with the Prophet Ali's salt was set up. They still would say Allah, you know, we know he's there, but we just don't. We don't worship Him. You guys know the name Abu Jamal. Who is he?

01:04:10--> 01:04:11

Who was Abuja hell

01:04:17--> 01:04:19

were saying, Who was he to the Prophet Selim?

01:04:21--> 01:04:22

I will gehele was

01:04:25--> 01:04:38

he was the tribe, one of the biggest tribal leaders who came from the same lineage Oh, the process of them. You're thinking about Abu Lahab Okay, on color processor. So Abu Jahad really close knit it right.

01:04:40--> 01:04:59

Well, Jana was a worst worst enemy to the process of so much so that scholars deferred, who was a worst enemy to Allah, Abu Jahan, or fear I own? There's a difference of opinion. That's how bad he was. I will gehele did everything in his power to humiliate, embarrass and kill and assassinate process

01:05:01--> 01:05:02

Look what happened one day.

01:05:04--> 01:05:05

One day,

01:05:07--> 01:05:17

he was seen by people in Mecca, standing by the processor in his house and listening to a processor I'm reading, or N. He's just standing there just listening

01:05:19--> 01:05:22

to some men walked by and they saw him and they said me doing

01:05:23--> 01:05:24

that, oh, nothing

01:05:25--> 01:05:27

left. Next day,

01:05:28--> 01:05:33

same men were walking by they see a Buddha Hill standing by for systems house listening.

01:05:34--> 01:05:44

Okay, what are you doing? They don't worry about your third day. And this kept on going for some time. So eventually they stopped them and said, Yeah, about Gen.

01:05:46--> 01:06:20

Y, let me tell us the truth, as I will tell us the truth. Do you believe that Mohamed, Salah Harleys. And that he's telling the truth that he's upon the truth? You know what a Buddha has said, so yes, I believe he's upon the truth is a worst enemy. Said Yes, I believe. So they asked him. So why don't you just follow him, instead of making us do everything that we're trying to do to expel him and do and hurt him? Like, why don't you just follow him just submit his message. You know what he said, he's like,

01:06:22--> 01:06:26

if I submit to His message, then that means I would lose power.

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Because he was in charge of the government of Mecca at that time, he had his own political party, and he was the leader of the biggest tribe, most powerful tribe, he's, I'm going to lose it all.

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So when you ask them, if Allah is real and exists, see, yeah, even Abu Joho could do it. Call Al Hamdulillah bellick Federal homeland area Moon sale Hamdulillah. But most of them have no knowledge last day.

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You know, there's quite a few notes here. So let's go through it real quickly. gratitude to Allah is a subset to Alhamdulillah and what's the greatest gift to look man? So we've talked about that.

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Hand, not in return for anything. So we've talked about that is the difference between saying thank you shocker and hummed Alhamdulillah when you say shocker, gratitude, you expect something in return. Like if I if I have if I say shukran or thank you to you, that's gratitude, I expect you to say something or at least technology. If you expect nothing that's called a hunt. Where your return is only from Allah subhanho wa taala. Right. Allah is worthy of praise and because of who he is a hand every imaginable hand belongs to Allah. So every form and expression of Alhamdulillah belongs to him. subhanho wa Taala hand is specific to the tongue, you cannot show it whereas sugar can be

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shown. So here's another difference between the two.

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Use another difference between the two, you can act out shocker. You can help somebody you can donate, you can do things to show your gratitude. Whereas Hamed specific to the tongue process and says, saying Alhamdulillah fills the scales,

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Students do you need a reason to say Alhamdulillah to be part of this hadith? No. One it's one of the biggest misunderstandings with Alhamdulillah

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is lots of Muslims feel like they need something to happen to sit to respond with a hammer now, you can just be walking around by yourself and have

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Allahu Akbar humble, you know, you're looking at the sky, you're looking at your car, you're sitting in a car, you're drinking coffee, whatever I'm

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just saying and hamdulillah Subhanallah you're scared your scales are getting filled. Med is another word for praise, but also a false one and something you don't have control over. So what I did here is just wanted to show you a little bit of difference in terms of the wording med it is also a type of praise but it can also be a false praise where you say to somebody men who are amazing today but they came in last place by the way.

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Oh man you Oh wow. You came in 27th place but you were like new or better than first place okay. That's called Med show code is also for Allah but only done in response of a favor done to you

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okay, let's take this last A and then I'll flip it back to the other sweetie for those of you are writing

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to Allah belongs to the heavens and the earth Lahemaa is summer worthwhile out in the law who will Hercule Hamid certainly He is Allah He Allah is the ultimately independent. You're trying to invite others to Islam but

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They're not inclined, Allah affirms nothing missing. I own everything. So this is a summary of all the yet we just looked at, even if they are you don't say Alhamdulillah. I am Hamid anyway. So having had in need of your hand.

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And with that being said, if you don't understand the meaning of Alhamdulillah, why does he need all that praise? This is one of the questions lots of people ask, Why does your God need so much praise so much? Like why do you have to keep saying Hamdulillah? And unfortunately, out of arrogance, people even just say things like, why does he talk about himself so much?

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And that's why you need to really be reminded that Allah does not benefit from a hummed. That's your answer to that question. Why do you guys have to, you know, keep saying Hamed and praising him all the time. You and I, if we're praised all the time, we get something out of that. That's why those questions go, why do you got to praise him all the time and fill his head with, you know, why do you got to do that? And Allah affirms, Look, I get nothing out of your hands. So you do it because it's part of your submission to the praise leads to arrogance. Why can't I say that about him? Allah never says medulla. So basically, in conclusion of today's session is basically Allah never ever

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commend you. Medulla like, say, a hammer in a way that I need it. Holy hamdulillah is what you what Allah, Allah says, say Alhamdulillah meaning, affirm your praise to me something I already have affirm that in your life, to the difference is that as you give me Alhamdulillah affirm and confirm Alhamdulillah in your life, that's what I want you to do. Really thin line but very distinct, as far as they're in sha Allah and next week, we will finish off the sort of Villa Subhanak Alohomora hum Tikka Chateau La ilaha illa Anta Sofitel, our tube relay? May Allah azza wa jal accept from us our efforts, all the students who are probably listening online if you have the opportunity and you're

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able to come into class please join us for next week, which will be our final session of the surah and the final session before the winter break. And also I will introduce our next surah the is Neela. After all in the new year in sha Allah Who Tada Okay, so now I'm ready to work.