Musleh Khan – The Marriage of Zayd and Zainab – Al-Ahzaab Unveiled – Class 7
AI: Summary ©
The importance of men and women in Islam is emphasized, along with the challenges of practicing and accessing Islam, including the need for practical knowledge and access to Islam. The speaker emphasizes the importance of protecting oneself and others from the "monster" factor, as it is rare for one to be true. They also encourage people to be patient and not give out the " honest" feeling, and to be patient and not give out the " honest" feeling.
AI: Summary ©
Alhamdulillah, wassalatu wassalamu ala rasulillah, alayhi afdalus salat
wa man wala amma ba'd.
Today, we're going to get into some really
uncomfortable stuff, okay?
So, no, I don't think we're at 32,
we are at 35 or 36, somewhere in
there?
30?
29.
Can I get a 31, anybody?
29, you really wanna go on it, eh?
Alrighty, bismillah, let's go, let's go.
So, just to refresh what we've been discussing,
I'd like to go back a verse or
two.
So, we have already introduced this section of
Surah Al-Ahzab.
This is going to get into the personal
life of the Messenger, alayhis salatu wassalam, particularly
when it comes to his wives.
And then today, we will get into the
marriage of Zayd and Zaynab.
And just really what the Surah teaches us
with respect to that marriage, and eventually the
marriage of the Prophet, alayhis salatu wassalam, to
Zaynab, okay?
Now, we mentioned that the wives of the
Prophet, alayhis salatu wassalam, now are in a
separate category.
They are the elite of the elite, the
greatest example for especially women, but for the
entire ummah as well.
But specifically, this is, if you're looking for
role models in life, these are the role
models now.
These verses now have put them in that
category.
Prior to this, they were not there, but
now they are official, and Allah has made
it official.
Now they have certain standards, we talked about,
that the regulars don't have.
And it took a while for some to
understand that.
And we looked at the verse that some
of them came to the Prophet, alayhis salatu
wassalam, asking him for some more of certain
things and, you know, material things and whatever.
And eventually, verses were revealed to guide them
through that.
Then the pledge began, who wants to live
the life of this world, or who wants
to sacrifice that life, and just concentrate in
the akhira, and not have any sort of
wealth or attachment, really, to worldly things.
Who was the first person to begin that
pledge?
Aisha radiallahu anha, and the rest followed, okay?
وَإِن كُنْتُ نَتْ تُرِدُنَ اللَّهَ وَرَسُولَهُ وَالدَّارَ الْآخِرَةَ
فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ أَعَدَّ لِلْمُحْسِنَاتِ مِن كُنَّ أَجْرًا عَظِيمًا
So this is the ayah that gave the
ultimatum, and this was the other side.
But if you desire, so remember, the previous
one was this.
It was all about hayat al-dunya, so
the world and its luxury.
Then, this was the other group.
But if you desire Allah and His Messenger
ﷺ and the everlasting home of the akhira,
فَإِنَّ اللَّهُ So the everlasting home is this,
وَالدَّارَ الْآخِرَةَ It's one of the titles for
the afterlife.
You refer to it as the everlasting, the
eternal life of the hereafter.
دَارُ الْآخِرَةَ is the Arabic way of saying
that.
فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ أَعَدَّ لِلْمُحْسِنَاتِ Then surely Allah has
prepared a great reward for those who do
good.
Do you see what just happened?
Let's see, did you pick up how Allah
referred to women, to wives, who prioritize the
akhira over everything?
He did not call them mu'minat.
He did not call them muslimat.
He did not call them qanitat, mutasaddiqat, sabirat.
Just look at the word that He called
them.
مُحْسِنَات مُحْسِنَات, plural, but it's in the feminine
form, referring to.
Everybody knows what a muhsin is.
مُحْسِن is the person who has the quality
of ihsan in them.
What is ihsan?
Ihsan is the climax of iman.
It's the highest level of faith.
There is nothing after ihsan.
There is nothing after that.
When somebody reaches now, what is the first
sign the Prophet ﷺ told us?
That you are at the stage of ihsan.
What's the first?
But he sees you.
What does that even mean?
To worship Allah as though you see him.
What does that even mean?
Like how does that even answer the question,
what's a muhsin?
Listen, if you remind yourself that Allah is
always watching, you've already taken care of taqwa
when you're alone.
Taqwa will become firm, strong, even permanent when
you're alone.
The person who has taqwa, who has their
faith, their iman, and they don't struggle when
they're alone, and they turn their alone time
to Allah time, tahajjud, dhikr, reflection, doing righteous
deeds where nobody knows, sees, or even hears
about.
When you take care of your private time,
that is the tap into the state of
ihsan.
Because ihsan is you live your life as
though Allah is always watching and monitoring.
But we know Allah does that.
When is the time where people forget that
Allah is watching them?
When they're alone.
So flip it.
If you're alone, but you turn that into
Allah time, you will tap into ihsan.
Let me say to you one more thing.
Ihsan, when you're there, the ulama say that
it is the first taste of Jannah.
You will feel like you are tasting or
experiencing a little bit of Jannah life.
Nothing in this world will bother you when
you take your private and alone time and
turn it into Allah time.
Nothing in this world will disrupt you.
Every problem and struggle and pain, personal, socially,
globally, it's going to be a problem and
you'll deal with it.
And you'll deal with it with patience.
You'll deal with it with knowledge and wisdom.
And you will live the most peaceful and
content life ever.
One more thing, tahajjud is also a sign
of being in the state of ihsan.
Now go back to these women.
Allah called them muhsinat simply because what?
They want Allah and the Prophet ﷺ.
This has nothing to do with marriage anymore.
Do you know that not one wife of
the Prophet ﷺ called him my husband or
Muhammad?
Not one of his wives referred to their
husband as my husband or Muhammad.
Or some sort of wife-husband nickname.
No.
They all called him Rasulullah or Nabi.
What does that tell you?
What do you learn from that?
When your husband drives you nuts, okay?
And you know, morning time you appreciate him,
respect him.
Afternoon time you wish you could choke him
and see how long he can continue breathing.
But then night time, it's back to normal.
All of that goes away when you see
Islam in him.
At least it's supposed to go away.
All of that frustration goes through a very
quick healing process for the wife.
When she sees, you know what man, the
Islam though in him.
Yeah, maybe he's annoying and he doesn't help
me with chores or he doesn't do certain
things.
And I'm talking about trivial things.
I'm not talking about major things, right?
If there's like things that are major, that's
a different story.
I'm just talking about the little things that
annoy all of us in marriages, right?
Everybody who is married, you know exactly what
I'm talking about.
But those annoyances are not things that are
detrimental to the relationship.
You just like, my God, it's so annoying.
All of that goes away when you look
at Islam.
The husband, the man, is the one that
can be the Imam of Islam in the
home if he does that.
And she will be amongst the Muhsinat if
that's all she focuses on.
The Islam, Islam in him.
99% of the problems are resolved or
they can be resolved.
There's more we're going to talk about this.
Because when we come to the marriage of
Zaynab and Zayd, we're going to delve into
why that marriage broke apart, okay?
وَالدَّارَ الْآخِرَ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ أَعَدَّ لِلْمُحْسِنَاتِ مِن كُنَّ
أَجْرًا عَظِيمًا A great reward for them.
يَا نِسَاءَ النَّبِي مَن يَأْتِ مِن كُنَّ بِفَاحِشَةٍ
مُبَيِّنًا Now the warning, okay?
A woman of a Nabi, go back for
a second.
Nothing about women of a Nabi.
يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِي Nothing about the women of
a Nabi.
So, what do you see here that just
happened?
They got a new title.
The women of a Nabi.
Now they are directly linked and connected to
him ﷺ, right?
Because now the pledge is over.
These are the women that have chosen Allah
and the Messenger ﷺ.
Next ayah, oh now you're not no Nisa
anymore.
Now you are Nisa al-Nabi.
You are the great noble women of the
Prophet ﷺ.
Why didn't Allah say Azwaj al-Nabi?
Zawj, plural, Azwaj.
Spouses.
Why did Allah call the wives Nisa?
You see, this is how you tap into
secrets of the ayat and you tap into
wisdom.
And you'll be surprised, almost every time you
do this, you can find answers no one
else sees except if they do this.
So, the translation is all wives, but we
know Nisa is not the Arabic word for
wives.
Nisa is women, but it's used here to
refer to the wives.
Why?
You know, it's one thing when you say,
this is my wife.
It's something else when you say, this is
the wife of all wives.
So this is a woman, a wife of
the Prophet ﷺ.
No, no, no.
These are the women of all women.
Those who are married, those who are not,
these are your role models.
This title is not in the generic way.
This title adds honor and respect to these
women, not just to other women that are
married, but to all women.
These are your role models.
It's incredible because how do we know this?
Because of the attachment of An-Nabi.
Okay, because of the attachment.
In Arabic, we call this Mudaf and Mudafunilayb.
The point is, because An-Nabi is there,
then you know that this is something very
specific and exclusive to the Prophet ﷺ.
There are going to be ayat that will
say, Ya Nisa, but it'll be addressing different
things.
When we get there, we'll see that.
So wives of the Prophet, if any of
you were to commit a blatant misconduct.
You all have heard the word Fahisha, right?
Fahisha, a better translation to really capture what
it entails is shame.
So when we say blatant misconduct, meaning shameful
behavior, shameful acts.
Not just within the family, but even socially
and anywhere.
So basically, you women, wives of the Prophet,
if you were to commit any shameful behavior.
Give me an example of shameful behavior.
The most common things that we hear about
and see.
Backbiting, slandering, showing off, exposure, *, all of
those things, right?
So Allah is saying, if you were to
fall into any of these things, Mubayyina.
You see this word here, it's not going
to be hearsay anymore.
It's been clarified and confirmed that somebody has
been up to no good, has been up
to shameful behavior.
So Mubayyina is like nobody can falsely accuse
them of anything.
Because if they do that, Allah will protect
these wives.
And it's already happened, right?
Remember Surah An-Nur with Aisha, it's already
happened.
So Mubayyina, now we put aside the rumors,
it's been confirmed.
The punishment would be doubled for her.
Does that make sense?
Why it would be doubled for her?
Okay.
وَكَانَ ذَلِكَ عَلَى اللَّهِ يَسِيرَ That's very simple
and easy for Allah.
Just for those maybe online that the reason
why their punishment is doubled, because the expectations
are higher.
The standard is higher.
You want to be the king.
Well, you also are going to be subject
to the most painful punishments as well, right?
So, all Allah calls them directly.
This is another thing to keep in mind.
I'm glad I put that there.
This is the first time Allah speaks to
them directly.
It's remarkable because go back to it.
They chose Allah and the Prophet ﷺ.
How do we relate to that then?
The wives.
How would you relate to that?
That they chose Prophet and Allah.
They prioritize Akhirah.
So, Allah talks to them directly.
Allah won't talk to us directly now.
So, how do we relate to that verse?
How would you relate to that?
Let me ask you.
Do you ever feel like Allah is talking
to you?
What happens that makes you feel like Allah
is talking to you?
Okay.
When you go back home and you're living
your day, your life, do you ever feel
like Allah is talking to you?
What causes you to feel that way?
Our way to connect to this?
The more you remember and you do your
Adhkar, the more you will feel like Allah
is listening and talking back to you.
You remember me.
What does Allah say?
I'll do it right back to you.
You see that feeling when you connect with
Allah, especially when you're alone.
It's the time when you will feel like
Allah is the loudest, if that makes sense,
right?
You will feel, really, really absorb and feel
something is different about the way I remember
Allah when I'm alone.
That's why the ulama, they say that Al
-Khalwa, like being isolated and alone, Al-Khalwa
Feehi Baraka.
It is a time of complete Baraka.
So you do something really small when you're
alone for Allah, and it will just sky's
the limit of how far that khair will
go.
When I used to teach students to memorize
Quran, I used to tell them that all
of the difficult surahs that you struggle with,
memorize it when mom and dad have gone
to the house and you're home by yourself.
So instead of going on Nintendo or watching
TV or whatever, just sit down with the
hardest surah and memorize it then.
So some of them actually followed through, and
all of them experienced the same thing.
Now those surahs become the easiest surahs for
them.
That's Baraka of when you're alone.
And obviously, we don't need to talk about
that.
To do that is also the biggest challenge
as well.
To take alone time and to turn it
into something as productive as that for Allah
is also a major, major, major challenge.
Why are there punishment double higher expectations, more
access to the sunnah?
See this?
Really, really important.
Can we relate to that?
Those of you who have husbands that not
are scholars, not are teachers, not are khateebs
and imams.
They're just practicing men.
And they have a genuine interest.
All of the mothers here and wives, your
mother and father, whether they are alive or
have passed, growing up when you were a
kid.
If they told you to do one little
thing, don't swear.
That's wrong.
That's all they said.
It stayed with you, didn't it?
Like there was nothing they needed to explain.
They didn't need to go into the different.
And this man had said no, whatever little
they knew, they gave it to you.
And that was all.
That was your entire Islamic upbringing, right?
So what you learn from this is that
somebody doesn't need to be of the highest
caliber of Islamic knowledge in order to experience
these things.
That's the point that I want you.
I want you to appreciate from this.
You don't have to be married to somebody
like the prophet alayhi salatu wasalam in order
to just relate to some of these ayat.
Many of you, if not all of you,
who have husbands that practice the deen and
have a genuine interest, but know very little
knowledge, but whatever little they know, they hold
on to it.
You can directly appreciate ayat like this.
And you have more access to Islam as
a whole just being married to someone like
that.
And of course, it also works the other
way around.
وَمَنْ يَقْنُطْ مِنْ كُنَّ لِلَّهِ وَرَسُولِ وَتَعْمَلْ صَالِحًا
نُؤْتِهَا أَجْرَهَا مَرَّتَيْنْ وَأَعْتَدْنَا لَهَا رِزْقًا كَرِيمًا Whoever
of you devoutly obeys.
وَمَنْ يَقْنُطْ We're going to come to this
word when we get to verse 35.
When we talk about وَالْقَانِتِينَ وَالْقَانِتَتْ We'll talk
a little more about it, but for now.
وَمَنْ يَقْنُطْ مِنْ كُنَّ لِلَّهِ وَرَسُولِ Whoever devoutly
obeys Allah and His Messenger.
وَتَعْمَلْ صَالِحًا So number one, of the women,
of these wives.
Whoever of you devoutly obeys Allah.
Number two, وَتَعْمَلْ صَالِحًا Follows that by doing
righteous deeds.
نُؤْتِهَا أَجْرَهَا We will grant her double the
reward.
مَرَّتَيْنْ And the last one, وَأَعْتَدْنَا لَهَا And
we have prepared for her رِزْقًا كَرِيمًا An
honorable provision.
We don't know what that is.
We don't know what they will receive.
Some of the scholars say they will have
a certain level of leadership of the women
of Jannah.
Other scholars say that this reward that Allah
is talking about is specific only for the
wives of the Prophet ﷺ.
So we don't know what it is.
The Qunut of the Prophet ﷺ is not
the same as any other husband.
So when he's leading his wives in Salah,
or they're praying behind him, it's a different
experience, right?
And to be able to pray behind the
man who Allah listens to and accepts all
of his duas, like that kind of access
to Allah through this individual, now you're married
to him, is really unique.
Can husbands use this ayah with their wives?
You know what?
I just want to stir some trouble here.
So let's see where this goes.
So can husbands use this ayah?
All jokes aside, I put that there because
I have had husbands who quoted this ayah
when they were not happy with their wife.
They say, oh, look at the wives of
the Prophet ﷺ.
I just want my wife to be devoted
to Allah.
So when she's cooking and stirring, Astaghfirullah, astaghfirullah,
la ilaha illallah, do you have the salt?
La ilaha illallah, Muhammadur Rasul.
Alif and just constant, that's what they expect.
Never make any mistakes, right?
And they said, look at the wives of
the Prophet ﷺ.
This is the surah, this is what I
want.
And can they use this ayah in that
scenario?
I hope the answer is clear here.
No, why not?
Why not?
Be very confident.
100% no.
Why?
Who's the audience of this ayah?
Their standard is nobody gets there.
Only them.
That's it.
Simple.
I'm not married to the Prophet ﷺ, unfortunately.
No, don't do that.
But, no, you can't use this ayah for
situations like that, right?
One for being a believer and for going
out of her way in being a Roma.
Okay, those are just some reflections of the
ayah.
Now the honor begins.
So we finish talking about the rewards, the
responsibilities.
Listen, it just keeps getting better and better
now for them.
Done.
You are not like any other women.
Period.
So that alone answers the previous question.
Can people use this ayah in their marriages
today?
This intro here makes it very clear.
إِنِ اتَّقَيْتُ فَلَا تَخْضَعْنَا بِالْقَوْلِ فَيَطْمَعَ الَّذِي فِي
قَلْبِهِ مَرَضٌ وَقُلْنَا قَوْلًا مَعْرُوفًا There's lots happening
in this ayah.
Lots.
If you are mindful of Allah.
إِنِ اتَّقَيْتُ from Taqwa.
So if you are conscious of Allah.
So sisters, pay attention.
These are qualities that are priority to Allah.
In a woman, especially a wife.
But because it's referring to the wives of
the Prophet ﷺ.
Don't just ignore them.
Just pay attention to them and see what
they mean to you.
إِنِ اتَّقَيْتُ Number one.
If you are conscious of Allah.
فَلَا تَخْضَعْنَا بِالْقَوْلِ Then do not be overly
humble in speech.
What does that even mean?
Overly humble in speech.
Oh God, I'm going to do it.
I told you.
This is going to get really uncomfortable.
And we haven't even started yet.
As-salamu alaykum.
As-salamu alaykum brother.
You look so handsome today.
You look young.
I love it.
We're not talking about a kid.
We're talking about a grown man.
MashaAllah brother.
I haven't seen you in 20 years.
And you still look young.
Wow.
Wish my husband looked.
No.
But you understand my point.
That's فَلَا تَخْضَعْنَا بِالْقَوْلِ Like don't let your
tongue get loose.
Even you're just trying to be kind and
humble.
Nobody pays attention to stuff like this.
Some people disguise this under this term.
Courtesy.
Kindness.
But the Sharia puts limitations to all of
that.
For the brothers, it's 10 times more stricter
than this.
Allah doesn't even get into talking.
Allah stops the men from their actions very
first.
Before you even say a word.
But here now, these women, these elite women.
The wives of the Prophet صلى الله عليه
وسلم.
They are no longer allowed to engage in
useless conversations.
Even if it's just very normal, very humble.
Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم build a beautiful
home for us.
No.
There has to be a wisdom or a
need to mention that to another man.
Otherwise, the conversation is done.
Unfortunately, another ayah that is constantly cherry-picked
and thrown at wives today.
This one here as well.
So then Allah continues.
Do not be overly humble in speech.
Look what Allah called this attitude.
Or those with sickness in their hearts.
So two things are going to happen here.
Either she may lose, you know, her tongue
and then say certain things that are crossing
lines.
Or she may be very cautious.
But the person she's talking to, she's taking
for granted.
You know how sometimes you'll meet a brother
that just, Sister, so how's things man?
So what did you cook today?
I don't know.
They're just talking wasteful.
Just making conversation.
You don't watch out for that stuff.
Because those are the things that silently destroy
Iman.
They silently shave off and burn Iman from
the heart.
That's why you will meet people who are
the kindest, most loving people.
And they will talk to everybody and anybody.
But just being polite.
At least according to them, just being polite.
This is the way I grew up.
It's my culture.
Whatever, right?
Okay, fine.
But you'll always notice the people who do
that.
The vast majority of their time, their Iman
is very stagnant.
Their Islam is the same when they were
10 years old and when they're 60 years
old.
It's the exact same.
This is a sign that you're climbing by
doing all of these great deeds in life.
And you're burning it out at the same
time because of this stuff.
And it's exactly what the Prophet ﷺ warned
us.
Do not be the student of knowledge who
is like a candle.
On the one hand, you bring light to
people around you.
But at the same time, what does the
candle do to itself?
It burns itself out, right?
And then it continues.
Or those with sickness in their hearts may
be tempted.
See, Allah is watching out for you that
if you might take that conversation for granted,
they might start to take the conversation a
little further.
You know what Allah said about men who
do this, who know how to like charm
a woman to talk to her and say
the right things?
You know what Allah described this behavior?
Allah described it as yasna'oon in Surah
Al-Nuh.
After Allah scolds the men to watch their
eyes and control them and control their behavior,
the end of the ayah, Allah says, Allah
is fully well aware of what a man
manufactures.
I'll give you an example.
Oh God, I really, I'm going to humiliate
myself but khair, you know.
A man will be like, As-salamu alaykum.
That's it.
Next day, as-salamu alaykum.
How are you?
You work here, huh?
Oh, okay.
You're the secretary?
Masha'Allah.
Third day, as-salamu alaykum.
What's your name?
Again, I keep seeing you every time I
come.
Fourth day, that's called yasna'oon, sunnatun.
When you see construction happening in Arabic, we
call that sana'a.
A man is very clever.
This is Allah's words, okay?
I'm not speaking out of experience or anything.
This is Allah's words, all right?
A man is very clever at putting a
plan together to get into her, to get
through to her.
They're very good at that.
So that's why Allah says, Oh, you think
one word, then it turns into a sentence,
turns into a conversation.
Okay, you know what?
It's better if we just text.
Just take my number down.
That sort of thing.
Yeah.
Allah says, I'm watching and I know every
step that you manufacture.
Then some people, they get clever.
They're like, okay, I'm not even going to
talk.
But you know, every now and then, I'll
just, you know, I'm at the lecture and
she's there.
Masha'Allah, you know, just checking on the
fountain, make sure it's good.
But really, he's not, right?
Because there's a Masha'Allah sitting over there.
So what does Allah says?
Allah tells us in another surah.
Allah says, I am tracking and keeping.
I know when the eyes steal, when the
eyes become thieves, they steal a glance.
Again, Allah is talking to the men because
we're really good at that.
Driving in the car.
Who's messing around with this mirror?
But really, he just saw a couple.
Masha'Allah, Tabarak, Allah is walking by.
Who was driving my mirror somehow?
Am I driving my car?
Oh my God.
Yeah.
Allah says, I know.
So don't take this stuff lightly, right?
And Allah continues and he says, but speak
in a moderate tone.
Did you see here?
When Allah says, speak in a moderate tone.
Allah didn't say, be quiet and don't talk
to men.
Got it?
Allah didn't say, don't talk to men.
Some, some.
It happens, right?
But you know, I mean, it happens, right?
But the point is, is that you as
sisters, these ayat empower you that you have
what it takes to detect and see this
stuff.
Stop telling and thinking, I don't know.
No.
Allah is saying here, you can figure this
out.
You know how we know this?
The last part of the ayah.
Speak in a moderate tone, which means you
can differentiate between when somebody is just trying
to talk smack and just prolong the conversation
to somebody getting to the point.
You know this.
Allah says, so the first lesson is Allah
does not say, don't talk to men.
Because that's not possible.
That's the Sharia doesn't do that either.
Number two, Allah says, Allah does not specify
exactly what this moderate tone looks like or
sounds.
You have to use your judgment and understand
when you're crossing a limit or someone else
is crossing a limit.
You have got to figure that out.
It's not outlined explicitly in the Sharia.
So Allah does give us some room to
figure this stuff out.
Okay, so really important.
And yeah, this ayah was all really about
this.
You know, if you flip this scenario, then
if you look at a woman's voice, you
know, the tone of her voice, the volume
of her voice.
That's not by accident, just because she's a
woman.
Allah designed her to have a calmer voice,
you know, a voice that is calmer and
nicer to the ears.
Why do you think almost all customer service
reps are who go into them when you
go to the malls?
Look at 90% of the sale reps
in every store.
Who are they?
Why?
Why do you?
That's not by accident.
That's not just by all their first applicants.
No, there's a very, I guess you could
say there's an underlying marketing scheme behind that
as well.
People just prefer that if they have to
have a conversation or get a service done
to talk to a woman.
That's not her problem.
That's not her fault.
Allah is just saying to us and reminding
us here that you're going to have this
problem.
This is going to be a fitna for
you.
And these are some of the things that
will happen to look out for and how
you protect yourself.
وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُّتِكُنَّ وَلَا تَبَرَّجْنَ تَبَرَّجَ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ
الْأُولَىٰ Settle in your homes.
So, first thing we got to talk about
is this.
Commit yourselves to your homes.
Okay.
وَقَرْنَ See this word here?
Remember this word.
قَرْنَ قَرْنَ which means to commit yourselves to
your homes.
What does that mean?
Unfortunately, people have interpreted and made their own
tafsir of what this means.
You go to the Arab world, they have
their own tafsir.
You go to the West Indian world, we
have our own tafsir.
You go to the Western world, own tafsir.
Everybody's got their own interpretation of what it
means for a woman to be at home.
And how long she should be there and
how long to stay.
So listen to this ayah.
Allah says وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُّتِكُ The fact that
Allah used this word قَرْنَ This is really
unique because it's not used to describe people
who stay in their homes.
قَرْنَ is not the word that's usually used.
مَكَثَ is used.
بَقَ is used.
عَاشَ is used.
Different terms that are more common.
قَرْنَ So what does قَرْنَ means?
قَرْنَ literally means exactly what you see here.
Most of the time when Allah says to
try Remember, we're talking to the wives.
The wives of the Prophet ﷺ.
Most of the times you need to spend
at home.
This is for the wives.
You know what for everybody else.
The Prophet ﷺ says That you do not
stop a woman from leaving her home And
she wants to go to the masjid.
وَبُيُّتُهُنَّ خَيْرٌ لَّهُنَّ But her home is better
for her.
Listen to the hadith again.
Do not لَا تَمْنَعُوا نِسَاءَكُمُ الْمَسَاجِد Don't stop
and prevent women from going to the masjid.
So what you're seeing here in comparison to
this ayah is that clearly the standard that
is mentioned in this ayah is far higher
than the average day-to-day Muslim woman.
When a Muslim woman we're not talking about
when she wants to go groceries or do
things of doctor school mall, get the kids.
That's all fine.
We're not talking about any of that.
We're just talking about the general rule of
thumb that you do not stop her when
she wants to seek knowledge or go to
the masjid.
And the principle is that she should always
tell herself that being at home and praying
and doing things there is more reward for
her.
That's it.
Not Oh, no, no, no, no, you should
because you know like jama'a is not
your thing.
No, no, no.
If she wants and she says, you know
what?
I'm not going for salatul isha at the
masjid today.
I'm just going to stay home.
She will be rewarded.
So the ulama differ on this.
They say that she will either be rewarded
more than the jama'a here or equal
to the jama'a here.
This is her praying alone at home.
So either more than us, which is the
majority opinion, by the way, she will be
rewarded more praying at home than if she
were to get to the masjid.
But if she says, no, no, no, I
want to go to the masjid.
I like it there.
There are other sisters there too.
And even if there's no other sister, she
is the only one that's perfectly fine.
The masjid is a safe place, a safe
haven for everyone anyway.
So there's no concern about that.
Right.
But so this ayah is setting the bar
as high as it goes.
For Allah's sake, literally stay in your house
as much as possible.
Period.
And do not display yourselves.
وَلَا تَبَرَّجْنَا تَبَرَّجْ الْجَاهِلِيَةِ الْأُولَىٰ Don't display yourselves
as women did in the days of the
pre-Islamic ignorance.
So back before Islam.
Students, what is tabarraj?
That word.
Remember this word.
It is one of the most common words.
If you don't know it, you will always
hear about it.
Scholars have written volumes about this word.
Beautify specifically for this.
Okay.
With the intention for this.
That's called tabarraj.
Some aspects cannot be hidden.
So you know there are some women that
no matter makeup or no makeup, dress up
or no dress up, she's always, always, you
know, going to catch the eyes of people.
Like people always see it.
She could be in an astronaut outfit with
a Halloween mask and still a brother might
look at her and say, Mashallah, man.
Look at her shoes.
Something.
She can't hide from it.
So when it comes to aspects of her
beauty, that no matter what she does, people
are still going to see and be attracted
to.
She's not accountable for none of that.
He can't just be like, listen, niqab is
going to be wajib on you from now
on.
You can't do that.
That's not her problem.
That's not her fault.
But now if she takes this beauty that
Allah has given her and adds to it
to enhance for the public view, that's a
different story.
That's called tabarraj.
Okay.
So nowhere in this ayah are we saying
wearing a little bit makeup, dressing a little
bit fancy.
All that stuff is wrong.
What we're saying is that just ensure you
follow some of these guidelines.
You're not doing it for nobody else.
You're going to a wedding.
You're going to a Eid gathering.
You're going to a nice little outing, but
you're with your husband.
You're with your family.
You're with other sisters, good sisters, et cetera.
It's safe.
You're not going around walking around downtown at
12 a.m. in the morning.
You're not doing none of that.
That's tabarraj.
The other thing here is that you see
if the wives of the Prophet ﷺ are
supposed to be mostly at their home, but
Allah says don't beautify yourself like how women
did before Islam, is not the same as
Allah saying don't beautify yourself at all.
You see the difference?
Allah does not say to them don't beautify
yourself at all.
Allah says to them don't do it like
those women in the past.
So does anybody have any sort of insight?
How did the women of the past before
Islam, what were they doing to beautify themselves?
So lots of jewelry.
The longer the hair, the more elite, the
more beauty is sort of like exemplified.
It's displayed.
Here's a good example that some of you
may have come across.
If you ever watch like those Arab shows
where they'll have like the women who will
have their hair open and they would like
do a performance or something, right?
But she will just stand there and just
wave her hair back and forth.
That custom comes from the old Jahiliyyah period.
It started there.
Because why?
Her hair is like a touch.
It's a sign of her beauty, right?
So those are the aspects that Allah is
saying, look, you don't have to go and
do it that way.
But if you're going to have tabaruj, then
make sure it's done well.
Now we have to talk about another uncomfortable
subject, okay?
And that is specifically, it's talking to and
directed to the wives, right?
We know now the wives of the Prophet
peace be upon him, their standard is very
high.
So what does this mean now for regular
day-to-day Muslim wives?
Now, how do they relate to this?
What do they get out of this ayah?
So the ulama all agree, the majority, majority
opinion is that especially in this part of
the world, if the wife wants to wear
a little bit of makeup just to freshen
up, right?
She's perfectly allowed to do that with one
rule.
The one rule is that it's done to
the extent of what is considered to be
normal for a good, pious woman in the
society and culture she belongs to.
So let me give you an example.
Is wearing like a little bit of, is
it eye shadow?
What's the black line called again that goes
around?
Eyeliner, okay, okay.
If she wants to put a little eyeliner
or a little bit of eye shadow, okay?
It didn't change her complete appearance, nobody can
recognize her.
No, she just wants to just brighten up
a little bit, right?
Is that considered here in Toronto where we
live, right?
Is that considered, oh my God, look at
her.
Or nobody can, that's the norm, right?
That's what I mean when I say to
the culture and the standard of people who
are considered or looked at as good people.
You know, people that are not gonna be
out there doing no good, no, no, no.
We're talking about just day to day regular
people who freshen up, who just wanna add
a little makeup and so on.
The ulama don't have a problem with that.
But if you go now to places like
Medina and just wanna put some eyeliner, blah,
blah, blah, take off your niqab and go
to the streets with a nice bright pink
abaya.
Now you have a problem.
Now you cross the lines of Tabaruj, because
why?
The culture over there looks at the women
who do that and there's a stigma attached
to that, right?
And they look at that and like, whoa,
she's standing out.
Wow, where did she come from?
So one of the rules of Tabaruj is
you never want to attract attention.
Attracting attention in appearance is not from the
sharia in any way, shape or form for
any, both men or women.
Yusuf Alayhi Salaam, when the brothers were told
to enter the palace from the father, the
father said split up, all right?
And go into abwaba mutathariqa, go into different
doors of the palace.
Why?
Why would they gonna attract attention though?
What's the problem?
If they were just their brothers, they're just
moving together.
Why can't they go through the same door?
But I mean, going splitting up, what if
some get lost?
Some don't know where to go.
Some don't get in, some don't get out.
Like when you're a family, don't you want
to try to stick together as a family?
Regardless what people take notice of.
The reason why Yaqub told these brothers to
do that, who is their brother?
Who is Yusuf in comparison, in terms of
his beauty, in comparison to all the mankind?
50%, Prophet Alaihi Salatu Wasalam told, 50%
of all of mankind's beauty is split up
in you and me, in all of human
beings.
The other 50% is in one person's
face, Yusuf Alaihi Salam.
Now these are his brothers.
You think they're just like some average, you
know, brothers walking into, no.
Think of Yusuf as like the Jibreel, and
these are the other angels that walk behind
him.
So people took notice.
The father knew he has some really beautiful,
handsome sons.
Nothing like Yusuf Alaihi Salam, but to protect
their sons, so nobody takes notice, nobody's like,
oh my God, there's how many of them?
All of that to avoid, go into different
doors.
So what do you think happened when that
happened, when they did that?
Nobody noticed that any of them walked into
the palace.
It worked.
Some Muslims, I don't know why they do
this, but they like that attention.
I don't know where it comes from.
I'm talking about like practicing Muslims.
I don't know, not sisters or like both
sides, I don't know where it comes from,
but for some people, they intentionally try to
act, to dress and behave in a way
where they can always be the center of
attention.
You know that one person, when all the
brothers talk, that one guy that has to
come in the middle, his voice is the
loudest, his opinion is the only one that
counts.
He has the final say, he has also
the first say, and nobody can get in
a word, that person.
I don't know where it comes from.
I think about it a lot, but unfortunately,
I end up noticing it a lot too.
That is not from the Prophet's way.
They could be, but just because you're an
extrovert, you don't have to be that out
there.
You don't have to attract attention to be
an extrovert.
And you don't have to be the other
extreme either, and be an introvert at the
same time.
There is a balance, right?
So the point that I want to make
with Tabaruj is, especially for the sister, that
whatever she chooses to wear, however she chooses
to present herself, that she tries her very
best not to attract the eyes and attention
of others.
And of course, that you try to allocate
this beauty of Tabaruj.
It is mostly encouraged in the home, in
front of her husband, for obvious reasons, right?
And we're going to talk, we're going to
dig into this even more so in the
next two ayat.
Yeah.
You're not accountable for that.
You're only accountable for...
They may not have noticed you.
I mean, I think she would know best,
right?
What, how much she puts and the difference
between if she does or does nothing at
all.
But there is a natural beauty.
Sisters, remember this, okay?
Verse 31 of Surah An-Nur, okay?
Allah tells...
وَلَا يُبَدِينَ زِينَتَهُمْ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا That,
this ayah.
So verse 31 of Surah An-Nur.
وَلَا يُبَدِينَ زِينَتَهُمْ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا Don't
expose her beauty.
She doesn't expose her beauty except that which
is obvious.
Which means, this is where I get it
from.
This is where we get it from.
There is a beauty in a woman.
Every single female in existence has this.
There is a beauty that Allah created in
her, in her physical appearance, she cannot do
anything about.
No matter, like I said, she could wear
a curtain and cover her entire body, still
be out there.
Somebody's gonna be like, well, they might freak
out, but still be like, mashallah, wow.
That curtain falls so good all over.
Like, doesn't matter what she does.
She can wear like six niqab.
Oh my God.
Her face is so beautiful, mashallah.
She can't do anything about it.
So when you ask these kind of things,
right?
No matter how little or how much or
in between, she just has to use her
judgment.
She has to know if she's doing a
little too much, if it's going to attract
the attention, if she's not sure, she can
figure it out as the days go by
and leave it at that.
You are not responsible at the end of
the day that no matter how little you
try to do, people still take notice.
You are not responsible for that at all.
So just keep that in mind.
Only women have this.
Men, unfortunately, you know, we're pretty much like
homeless people.
I mean, no matter what we do, we
have to groom ourselves to look appropriate.
A woman doesn't necessarily have to do that.
She could just be like in slacks out
there or whatever.
And there is a beauty in her that
Allah created her with.
You know, one last thing I'll say to
you about that is that, you know, it's
not a bad thing.
It's not a bad thing when Allah calls
you beautiful.
It's one thing when a stranger calls you
that, okay, fine.
When Allah is saying that she has a
beauty in her, what more of a validation
does she want?
You know, there are especially like high school
girls that have to like go to counseling
because their self-esteem gets really, really bad
when somebody looks at them, oh my God,
you look so like weird, so skinny, so
short.
Why is your nose like that?
Right?
It's just simple sentence, right?
But it affects them really, really bad.
Destroys their positivity in anything.
And hopefully, inshallah, you know, when she can
tell herself that despite what others say, Allah
called me beautiful, that she can just, okay,
I don't need nothing from nobody else.
Because Allah told me I'm beautiful and there's
nothing I can do about it.
That's everything for me.
Brothers, we don't have an A like this
at all, not even close.
Anyhow.
وَأَقِمْنَا الصَّلَاةَ وَآتِينَا الزَّكَاتَ So these are the
standard things.
Establish your prayer, pay your zakat, obey Allah
and His Messenger.
إِنْمَا يُرِيدُ اللَّهُ لِيُذْهِبْ عَنْكُمُ الرِّجَسَ أَهْلَ الْبَيْتِ
وَيُطَهِّرَكُمْ تَطْهِيرًا Allah only intends to keep the
causes of evil.
لِيُذْهِبْ عَنْكُمُ الرِّجَسَ See this word here, rijas?
That, immorality, okay?
Allah is saying the reason why I put
these rules of try to be at home
as much as you can, try not to
beautify yourself too much, dot, dot, dot, dot,
because of to protect you from any immorality.
And just think about what the world is
today.
Think about how women are exploited in commercials,
in posters, in just literally everything.
It's literally sold to us on a daily,
daily basis.
So Allah is saying the reason why I've
set these for you is لِيُطَهِّرَكُمْ لِيُذْهِبْ عَنْكُمُ
الرِّجَسَ أَهْلَ الْبَيْتِ Purify you completely.
And purify you completely, all members of the
Prophet's family.
See what happens at the end there?
Allah reminds because once again, you belong to
this home, you belong to this man, you
belong to this family, okay?
You carry the highest standards.
وَذْكُرْنَ مَا يُتْلَى فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ مِنْ آيَاتِ اللَّهِ
وَالْحِكْمَةِ Always remember what is recited in your
homes of Allah's revelations.
You know what's happening in this ayah 34?
Now, just imagine this for a moment, okay?
You are married to him ﷺ, and Quran
is being sent down to him whilst you're
sitting in the living room.
He's receiving Surah Al-Ahzab, like Allah is
talking to him.
You, out of all the Muslim women in
existence, Allah chose you to be next and
be married to the man whom Allah will
directly give Wahiya and inspiration to.
Like, it's just beyond words, just how important
and remarkable that moment is.
So what does Allah say?
Always keep the remembrance of Allah, and constantly,
constantly recite those remembrances in your home.
The ayat, the adhkar, and any prophetic wisdom.
This is Quran's way of saying, and any
of the house rules of the Prophet ﷺ.
So if you know, he just says, look,
you know, why don't you just like, when
it gets dark, leave that and just come
sit with me.
So what these wives will say, they would
not be allowed to say, but Ya Rasulullah,
can I just finish the sweeping?
Is this my last chores and I'm done?
I need to finish this, because it bugs
me.
No, not for the wives.
So hikmah here is a very beautiful and
subtle way of also being there and respecting
the Prophet ﷺ's preferences, if you'd like, in
the home.
It gets much more deeper and intimate than
that as well, and we don't need to
go into detail.
Surely Allah is most subtle and all aware.
This ayah here, ayah number 35, this ayah
is the most detailed and explicit verse of
the entire Quran about the subject of gender
equity.
The most detailed and explicit verse of the
entire Quran.
Now listen to it.
What are you already hearing about this ayah?
There's this beautiful rhythm.
It is also the most rhythmic ayah of
the entire Quran.
That's why imams and you have YouTube videos
of just this verse.
Just this verse alone.
Why?
Because it just sounds beautiful.
When reciters want to highlight their talent in
recitation, this is one of the verses they
will recite it out.
And the old classic reciters, they would recite
this entire verse in one breath, just to
display the gift that they have.
So let's just take a look at this
step by step.
Surely for Muslim men and Muslim women.
So what's happening here?
First thing is that the women are supposed
to pay extra attention to this surah.
Why did I put that there?
Because of all that we just went through.
We're talking about the wives, the wives, the
wives, the wives, right?
Now this verse came here.
So it's already now set this tone that
this surah, these ayat are of the most
importance, especially to her.
The entire surah, by the way.
So we're taking now our outlook on this
surah even further.
Now you're going to take all, whatever it
is, 73 ayat of the surah now.
When men are women and women are spiritually
equal in the sight of Allah, meaning they
are equal in terms of deeds and the
wrong deeds, the evil deeds.
So righteous as well as the wrong deeds,
they're accountable exactly the same in front of
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
So surely the Muslim men and Muslim women,
believing men, believing women, devout men, devout women.
So that's these ones we've already talked about.
We already discussed the difference between the two
as well.
No, I did it there twice.
Great.
What just happened there?
It didn't save here.
That's interesting.
Okay, that's fine.
I remember them.
Anyways, I just noticed that all of my
notes, I put about 20 additional slides are
not here.
Okay, that's fine.
Okay, this word here.
We saw in a previous verse, people who
are devoutly servants to Allah, that worship Allah
in a devoutly way.
What does that mean?
Khamiteen is like, no, no, no, no, no,
no.
I can't do that because that's wrong.
No, no, no, no.
I have to finish this surah.
You see, when you get uncomfortable because you
set a goal and you don't reach it,
and that goal is obviously you want to
recite something, you want to pray.
Let's say you set a goal.
I'm going to pray tahajjud every single night
for this week, but I'm only going to
do two raka'ats.
Then when it gets to the fourth night,
the sleep is just the best sleep of
your life.
And you're like, then you sleep through it.
You wake up for Fajr.
That feeling.
Oh my God, I can't believe I was
on such a good roll.
I was such a good rhythm.
I was getting used to it.
That's called Khamiteen and Khamitaat.
It's like when you feel like this desperation,
this willingness to always do things and serve
Allah, but at the same time, when you
fall short, it just bites you the wrong
way.
That's Khamiteen and Khamitaat.
How do you get there?
Devout men and women.
How do you get there?
How do you know you're there?
Exactly how we described.
If anytime you pray salah, and let's say
you pray it late, and it bothers you.
It just bugs you, man.
Like you're stuck in traffic.
Missed Maghrib.
Now your road rage begins, right?
Yeah.
That's when you know you have this Khamiteen
in you.
You have it.
So you just have to channel that in
the right way.
This is no way an open ticket.
Okay, your road rage is perfectly permissible now.
No.
Okay.
Truthful men and truthful women.
Wasadiqeen wasadiqaat.
How do you become somebody that is, you
have the quality of honesty and truth in
you.
How do you become that person?
Don't say to me just by telling the
truth, because we all know that people don't
really do that.
A lot of people don't do that.
So how do you become this person that
you're going to be truthful, whether it's for
you or against you?
That's your principle in life.
You live like that.
That's rare, by the way.
Right?
Okay.
You know Allah is watching you.
Give me something practical now.
Great start.
Allah is watching you.
Now, practically, how do you develop this?
Because the people who lie also know that
Allah is watching them.
Something is missing.
What is it?
Okay.
You're on the right tracks.
It has to do with people.
Where's my hufadh?
Oh, people of Iman, be with those who
are always telling the truth.
That's the number one way to develop the
quality of an honest person, is by surrounding
yourself with people who are honest.
You cannot do this alone.
The temptation and the call, the pressure to
tell a fib here and there, to bend
the truth here and there, is too strong
for one person.
You can't do this alone.
That's why Allah says, people of Iman, be
around those who are honest.
He didn't say, if you would like, this
is better for you.
No.
It's an open, explicit command.
But there's one ingredient you have to have
for it to work.
It's in the same ayah.
That's the ingredient for it to work.
That people who are honest.
And we all do this.
You all have people around you.
You're like, oh, my God.
If I was in your shoes, I don't
know if I could.
But we appreciate when we see it.
When you expect people to be dishonest and
they come to you in an honest way,
we call it out.
We'll say, man, that is so honest of
you.
I left my phone there and you looked
for me and brought it back.
You know, I found a cell phone when
I was in Medina, in the mall.
It was just sitting just like this on
the table.
So I picked it up, I unlocked it,
and I just called the first number.
I didn't want to see anything.
I just swiped the first number.
Somebody, some brother picked up.
After the first ring.
So I spoke to him in Arabic and
I just tell him, you know, look, I
found this phone here on the table.
And the brother said, where are you?
So I said, I'm sitting in front of
this restaurant.
Come here, so-and-so.
Within maybe ten seconds, he reached.
He hugged me.
I was with a couple.
He hugged all of us.
He paid for all of our food.
He went, got us some special Saudi dish,
whatever it was.
Nice, beautiful.
I don't know, man.
I think this meat came from Jannah somewhere
and it landed in this mall, mashallah.
Brought it.
He said, this is my gift to you.
Took his number.
He became our driver for the rest of
the Umrah trip.
For free.
Took us anywhere we wanted to go.
When you see people honest to you in
times where you expect the opposite, you can
only arrive there by surrounding yourself with honest
people.
Believe me, it's hard.
It's not easy.
Even for like people, like I'm surrounded with
good people most of the time.
And subhanallah, it is a real jihad.
Like you really have to fight to keep
that around you.
Because why?
That is just a fitna of life.
You are always going to be tempted to
bend the truth here and there.
So, they don't have a choice in this.
So, the journey of being truthful also needs
what?
You got to be really, really patient.
Yeah.
Because sometimes it might mean that you have
to distance yourself from people you grew up
with.
Because they are just too dishonest.
Yeah.
And they will like notice it.
Why aren't you replying?
Why aren't we hanging out like we used
to?
What happened?
We've known each other since we were kids.
Besides, I hate your husband.
Yeah.
See the...
You don't hate your husband.
Is your husband the one doing this?
Taking you away from me?
Yeah, he's evil.
So, you try to distance yourself.
It's hard.
SubhanAllah.
So, sabireena wassadiqat.
By the way, this is just my thing.
Okay, don't quote me on this.
As I look at this verse more and
more, I start to see there is a
connection with every group prior and after.
So, the first group is connected to the
second group.
Muslimeen connected to mu'mineen.
Then qaniteen is connected to ssadiqeen.
To get ssadiqeen, you need to be a
sabireen.
Walssabireena walssabirat now leads you to khashieeen.
So, khashieeen from khushu'a, humble.
When you're patient, we all know that.
You're just humble.
No, no, no, it's okay.
He's late for the 16th time in Ra'd.
You're just humble.
You still owe me?
Your past, yeah, it's been five days.
Alhamdulillah, it's okay.
When you're ready, inshallah.
You're just humble.
You're just nothing.
Your khushu'a, your fear only comes out
in salah in front of Allah.
You know what khushu'a means?
So, khashieeen comes from the word khushu'a.
Everybody knows what khushu'a is?
Khushu'a is when you stand in prayer
and you limit your movement as much as
possible.
The less movement you have, the more khushu
'a you have.
Okay?
Because khushu'a is that you're so scared.
Like if there was a tiger that stood
by that door, you freeze.
It's not because it's the right thing to
do.
You're so scared, you're like...
That's called khushu'a.
That's why we always tell each other, have
khushu'a in salah.
In other words, stop moving around.
Hijab, takiri, this, oh God.
I don't know, there's a lot of people
that do that.
All of the above.
Part of your concentration is to limit your
movement as well.
The Prophet ﷺ told us an authentic hadith
in Abu Dawood is that when somebody carelessly
turns their head and looks around, you know
how there's that one person?
They keep track.
They have sort of like a digital database
in their mind, tracking everybody who walks through
the door.
That person.
The Prophet ﷺ told us every single time
they do that carelessly, Allah turns his face
from them as well.
Which means that they lose the reward in
their salah at that moment for that.
You're losing reward, so you'll never get the
complete reward of salah.
I mean it should be obvious, we shouldn't
even have to explain that.
It should be obvious why that's like a
bad habit to have.
To just be doing that carelessly, right?
Yeah, I know what you mean.
Yeah, I know.
All jokes aside, I understand.
It is a very, very careless, unnecessary thing
to do.
And I just want you to rest assured
that this hadith and others, people are accountable
for that kind of carelessness in their salah.
They're accountable.
And the reward, especially when they're doing it
carelessly.
Yeah, when the elderly, they're not accountable for
nothing.
Don't be so hard on the elderly, man.
They're probably checking the cataract in their eyes.
I have a cataract in my eye.
Yeah, no, I'm just saying, they're probably not
sure if they see one of you, or
is there two of you?
I don't know.
Do you think it's hard to judge them
though?
Because sometimes they're going to be watching you
and not even seeing, right?
Well, I mean it could be a number
of things.
So that's why I was saying, just leave
it alone.
Even if it's somebody young, just leave it
alone.
You don't judge anybody regardless of their age,
right?
Well, let's pause there inshallah, because there's a
lot to hatch out.
And I don't like the idea of how
my notes did not get saved here.
So I have some beautiful notes that I
wanted to share with you.
Okay, let's stop here and next week inshallah
we'll resume.
Subhanakallahumma bihamdik.